I mean really. A couple of days ago I realized I hadn't updated my staff bio in forever (read: 6 years), which means I was literally 13 when I wrote it. If you have ever encountered the average 13 year old online, you may have been slightly taken aback by the things they threatened to do to you and your loved ones. Needless to say, writing short paragraphs about their still developing sense of self in a humorous, yet not-incredibly-immature-sounding way is not one of their strong suits. Just look at the early days of Adventurer's blog for an idea of what I'm talking about.

My point is, I have a new bio (thanks Gata). The old one has been purged.

...

BUT that's not the end of it though. Fortunately for you and unfortunately for me, I decided to save it. I mean, what is the point of past mistakes if you can't learn from them? And also because something like that didn't deserve to disappear forever- it was a testament to my youth. A reminder of a different, happier time, when... er... Krika (?) and Tahu et al. were trudging around a swamp, with giant bat-Makutas flying overhead. And those Axalaras and Rockohs, how great were they? Good times, man...

Anyway, here is the screenshot. Enjoy.