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TMD's Fifth Annual Movie Awards Part Two

Posted by Ta-metru_defender , Jun 04 2013 · 94 views

Part Two of TMDs Fifth Annual Movie Awards
 
Alright guys. Time for the individual awards. As you should expect (if you've been following my awards [which you totally should be]), we've got my… unique categories. Which are the categories you should care about.
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Worst Movie
Basically, what sucks. These movies are not so-bad-they're-good, but are so-bad-they're-worse.
 
Nominees:
October Baby
A movie so heavy handed with its message the story barely gets told.
Rock of Ages
Great soundtrack! Too bad everything else sucks.
 
Winner: The Watch
This movie's main redeeming quality is Richard Ayoade. Sadly, he's not enough of a factor to save this lousymovie that had so much potential but just crashed and burned right out the gate.
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Baddonkey of the Year
Every good action movie's got him. You can throw an army and the kitchen sink at him, and he still prevails. And for that, he is awesome.
 
Nominees:
Abraham Lincoln, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
The 16th President uses a silver axe to kill vampires. That is all.
Judge Dredd, Dredd
Karl Urban's chin has never looked quite so manly and intimidating.
Black Widow, The Avengers
Proof that a Baddonkey doesn't have to be pure muscle or a man, Natascha Romanov earns her nomination due to fighting not just smart but hard too.
 
Winner: James Bond, Skyfall
James Bond really shines in this reconstruction of the James Bond mythos.
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Best Dialogue:
Is it stilted or awkward or does it roll of the tongue?
 
The Avengers
Joss Whedon. 'nuff said.
 
But if not, here's more: Y'see, Joss Whedon is a fantastically economical writer. He uses dialogue to quickly establish exposition without it ever seeming outright and can also establish characters with just a few lines. It's impressive (and something I am very jealous of). Then of course his dialogue is just brimming with wit. This man is one of the best writers of dialogue today.
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Best Comedy
Did it make you laugh? And more importantly, did it make you laugh well?
 
Ted
It's a foulmouthed teddy bear. if that's not your cup of humor, fine. But if it is you'll spend the movie's duration laughing incessantly. The humor's twisted and dark (due in no small part to, again, the incongruity of a foulmouthed teddy bear). It's hilarious, and you'll text your friend the thunder buddy song when it rains.
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Best Soundtrack
Music carries a film. Duh. Here's the best:
 
Nominees:
Rock of Ages
Lousy movie, epic 80's music.
The Avengers
This soundtrack is epic. Leaving the BluRay's menu on while getting ready to watch it yields the most epic walks down a hallway. You want a soundtrack that captures the heroism of this movie? Alan Silvestri delivered.
Django Unchained
Why? Because mixing Rap/HipHop into a Western about a black man is awesome.
 
Winner: Paperman
Just listen to Christophe Beck's score for this and try to disagree with me.
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Coolest Movie
This is the movie that makes you think "Holy snap that's frickin' awesome"
 
Nominees:
John Carter
This movie gets an oddly bad rap despite being a slick, really really cool piece of science fiction.
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
It's a relatively historically accurate biography of the 16th president except he hunts vampires. And. It. Is. Awesome.
Skyfall
It's James Bond being James Bond, only better.
 
Winner: The Avengers
It's Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, The Hulk, Black Widow, and Hawkeye on screen together fighting Loki. What more do you want?!
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Who needs character/plot development when you've got booms?
 
Nominee:
The Expendables 2
Sure, it's not as beautifully gruesome as the first, but it's still a wonderful action movie.
 
Winner: Dredd
It's not quite as mindless as my usual nominees for this category, but the slomo action scenes are just gorgeous. Who knew a skull exploding could be so beautiful?
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Most Innovative
This is the movie that did something new, something cool, or just special.
 
Nominees:
Dredd
It played with 3D and slow motion, using it as a narrative device as much as for spectacle
The Avengers
Proved that a superhero team-up not only works, but can be amazing.
Blue Like Jazz
Wait, a movie by Christians about a Christian that's not hawking dogma? Impossible!
 
Winner: Cloud Atlas
No, it's not an amazing movie, but it tried something new and kinda pulled it off. So props to them.
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Best Special Effects
If I need to explain this, then, well, stop reading.
 
Nominees:
Ted
The bear, man. Of special note is the fight between Mark Wahlberg and Ted. That's all around impressive.
Life of Pi
No bear, but the composite work with the animals deserves a mention.
 
Winner: The Avengers
ILM made a CGI model of a chunk of Manhattan. That alone would be enough for a spot on the list, but the Hulk just notches them up here.
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Best Actor:
Daniel Day-Lewis, Abraham Lincoln, Lincoln
I get the feeling this is the image of Lincoln everyone will think of from now on out (which is a shame; I wish everyone thought of him hunting vampires). But Day-Lewis' performance is so amazing no one else can even enter this list.
——————————
 
Best Actress:
Jennifer Lawrence, Tiffany Maxwell, Silver Linings Playbook
For the record, she was my pick before the Oscars. She was fantastic in 2011's X-Men: First Class and really took off in The Hunger Games, but it's in Silver Linings Playbook where we really see her shine.
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Movies That I Really Like For Reasons That I'm Not Quite Sure
These aren't the best movies of 2012, but they're up there.
 
Blue Like Jazz
It's not the most amazing movie, but it gets points for its honesty and dedication to telling the story it wants to tell.
 
The Cabin In The Woods
I'm a big fan of deconstruction and post-modern storytelling. This film takes that and applies it to a genre I usually avoid and creates masterful results.
 
The Amazing Spider-Man
Yes, I liked this one more than the old ones. Maybe it's casting Andrew Garfield, Emma Stone, and Martin Sheen, maybe it's the closer focus on telling a story about Peter Parker, maybe it's because freakin' Marc Webb's directing, or maybe it's because Till Kingdom Come is in it.
Probably all of the above.
 
Skyfall
There's just so much going for this masterpiece of a movie. It's a reconstruction that serves as a brilliant, fun movie that's able to capture both highs and lows.
 
Silver Lining's Playbook
I don't even know where to begin with this movie, just that I really really loved it.
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Best Animated Film:
Paperman
This is probably my favorite non-Pixar piece of animation Disney's produced since Tangled (and before that, The Lion King). It's magical, something that suddenly makes the world outside the animation seem more real. Coupled with the phenomenal soundtrack and, it's beautiful. Just beautiful.
——————————
 
Best Moving Picture:
The Avengers
Look, you knew this was coming. I wrote too many Essays, Not Rants about it, but let me list the reasons why this is unquestionably the best movie of 2012:
  • Incredibly deft screenplay that balances exposition and action
  • The team dynamic hits the appropriate speed bumps
  • Every main character has an arc
  • Joss Whedon's banter is in full effect
  • Fantastic action that never loses the characters
  • Great special effects
  • That one long shot of each of the six during the final battle
  • It paid off on the last four years of hype
  • Shawarma


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Vorahk1Panrahk2
Jun 04 2013 10:32 PM

Maybe it's because society (see: AMPAS) keeps telling me not to do it, but it seems strange to see you lumping Paperman in with other full length films. I do agree that it is a wonderful short, though, and props for mentioning Beck's music. I'm pretty excited to hear what he'll come up with for Frozen.

 

Also I have to say your category for soundtrack seems super eclectic to me. I like it.

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:kaukau: Worst Movie: Gotta think this through, since I don't necessarily hate it, but most people would probably list Battleship as a candidate.  However, I'm not sure if I would personally put it at that level, since it was a dumb idea but not terrible.  I'd have to think back to every film I watched this year.  There might have been some that I'm overlooking because they were bad enough.  However, I am good at avoiding truly bad movies, so chances are that I'm really not qualified to judge here.  From what I here, it's probably the last Twilight movie.  From what I've personally seen, however, I'm looking back through my reviews and I would really have to settle on Red Dawn.  Total Recall was also a pretty bad remake, but at least it wasn't bland.

Baddonkey of the Year: Seriously, you listed Black Widow?  Shame on you.  Everyone knows that the most awesome person in that movie was Maria Hill.

maria_hill_drawing.jpg

That piercing gaze, her nonchalant self-assurance, her graceful poise, the authority with which she carries herself, the way you know she's secretly better than Nick Fury at everything.  Maria Hill, my friends.  Remember that no matter how much you achieve in life, you will never be as cool as her.

Best Dialogue: Lincoln, by a mile.  It was truly beautiful and profound, without being stilted and fake.  I could truly buy that the lines came from their speakers' guts.

Best Comedy: I like clean comedy, personally.  I can't think of anything I saw that was specifically a comedy, although The Expendables came close.

Best Music: The only score I really walked away with last year was from Prometheus.  I really want to watch Paperman again, though.  I just wasn't paying attention to the music the first time around, and I don't know if I would qualify it on the basis of it being a short film.

Coolest Movie: The Avengers

Who needs character/plot development when you've got booms?: The Expendables 2

Most Innovative: Hard one for me to call, since I haven't seen Cloud Atlas and the trailers make it look pretty innovative, but since those can be deceptive, I'm not going to go out and say it.  From what I've seen, I would agree with your runner-up, The Avengers, since it truly did surprise me with a legitimately good superhero mash-up.  However, if we're including short films, the innovation of the year that really caught my eye was the animation techniques used for Paperman.

Best Special Effects: Sorry, but the Chitauri looked like extras from a video game, and I didn't even need to freeze the frame to see it, to The Avengers was never on my list.  I was mainly impressed by The Life of Pi.

Best Animated Film: I won't compare Brave with Paperman.  It's really not fair.  There's a reason why the Academy puts them in separate categories, and for their respective fields (shorts versus feature films), they were both the clear winners.

Best Actor: Daniel Day-Lewis.  I have truly never seen a performance as immersed or as unlikely.

Best Actress: Of those that were nominated, I only saw Jenniger Lawrence's, though from the glimpses that I got, I was rooting for Emmanuelle Riva and Quvenzhane Wallis.

Best Picture: Lincoln

 

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