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Janus

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blog-0585763001360646402.jpgWith a mournful cry Wenglestum cradles his fiance's body and vows that he WILL have a funeral (and it's going to be AWESOME. I mean, that wedding budget has to go SOMEWHERE right?)

 

He's barely placed his beloved's body on the ground when there are MORE things to shoot (which honestly is pretty good, because he's kind of ticked. I mean not only did he lose his first squadmate EVER, but it just happened to be his FIANCE. What are the ODDS?)

 

Anyhow he walks a bit, shoots a bit, yells at Kaidan a bit (dude will NOT be quiet) and then sees some crazy robot flashlight eye things. WHAT WILL HE DO, oh wait, they killed a human so I guess it's time to shoot them. So he does and they're dead, and then--oh dear. Oh dear is that human seriously wearing pink and white armor? Like pink and white armor? As in PINK?

 

Yes unfortunately she is. Also she apparently got her entire squad killed by the robot geth flashlight things. Or at least her entire squad got killed by those things, and she maybe blames herself? Honestly, Wenglestum is kind of tired of all these people talking about things. HOW DOES HE RESPOND. (Also this one is a threefer because I AM NOT WAITING AROUND FOR ASHLEY)

 

1. Are you okay? - I mean seriously, she is willingly dressed in white and pink armor. If nothing else that is a sign of mental damage.

2. What happened here? - Pink. Armor. Wenglestum has to know how this happened.

3. We're on a Mission - Wenglestum can't stand to be around her, let alone look at her. I mean that armor.

 

BONUS POINTS IF YOU ANSWERED 1.

 

2.1. What Happened to the rest of your unit? - Yeah, did your wardrobe scare them off?

2.2. Fighting these things? - I guess flashlight robot geth death machines are somewhat important maybe.

 

BONUS POINTS IF YOU ANSWERED 2.1

 

3.1. Don't blame yourself - I Mean I guess she shouldn't feel bad about killing her squad. Her choice of uniform on the other hand...

3.2. What killed them? - Wenglestum reveals that he hasn't actually been paying attention to anything this entire time, or subtly indicates that he thinks that Ashley is a serial killer.

3.3. You abandoned them - Wenglestum is a butt, who does buttlike things because he doesn't like Ashley. Her and her pink armor. (It offends him because it will look so much better on him)

 

"Wheel of Morality, turn turn turn. Tell us the lesson that we should learn"

"Brush your teeth after every meal--this moral brought to by the American CANADIAN Dental Association"

 

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OKAY UHH

[11:06:42 PM] Kakaru: 1.

[11:06:56 PM] Kakaru: because reasons

[11:07:23 PM] Kakaru: 2.2, because Commander is clueless and legitimately doesn't know if there was fighting

[11:07:43 PM] Kakaru: 3.2 because he just doesn't know anymore

[11:08:37 PM] Kakaru: sometimes I pick the most ambiguous answer because someone tries to talk to me in the middle of a cutscene and I miss important junk

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