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Jurassic World: Welcome to the early 1900's

believe victims

Entry posted by believe victims

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I have said many a word of how Jurassic World seeks to bring dinosaur science of the 1980's to the public. I apologize, for I have spoken in error.

 

They're going back further than that.

 

vvrhETy.jpg?1

 

That's right, it's a tail-draggin' dinosaur, right out of the early 1900s, for your viewing pleasure. Mind you, this tail posture is impossible for Stegosaurus (with one of the most compelling reasons for this being that its cloaca would be crushed), and has been known to be so by palaeontology since the Dinosaur Renaissance (the very revolution in thinking of dinosaurs that the original Jurassic Park brought to the big screen), and even a one-minute consultation with almost any palaeontology expert would be enough to keep something like this out of the film.

 

Honestly, at this point, just stick the sauropods in the swamps and put heat lamps in the exhibits for the cold-blooded creatures. While they're at it, they can lay off their palaeontology consults, because clearly they're being paid for absolutely nothing. There is nothing in this film so far that shows they did any research beyond watching the first film. It is, quite frankly, pathetic.

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Lyichir

Gosh, your topic title makes me think of how much cooler (and sillier) the series would be if it were steampunk.

 

"What do you MEAN the Iguanadon wasn't born with a horn? Try again! We shan't have inaccurate dinosaurs in OUR gallery of amusements!"

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CyclonatorZ

I think all these Jurassic Park posts you've made are imprinting themselves on my subconscious. See, I had a dream a couple nights ago, in which I went to a showing of Jurassic World (for what reason I can not fathom), only to discover that the trailers were all lies, because the dinosaurs in the movie were actually feathered, and the movie was actually good.

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Makaru

OKAY HERE'S WHAT I DON'T GET

 

Okay so, these are how the Stegosaurus' look in the new film, right? Set AND filmed after Jurassic Park: Lost World

 

jurassic_park_lost_world_stream.jpg

This is the groundbreaking movie that cast Vince Vaughn as "the animal rights activist who screws literally everyone over"

 

 

Film research GOT WORSE over the course of 18 years.

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Lyichir

Gosh, your topic title makes me think of how much cooler (and sillier) the series would be if it were steampunk.

 

"What do you MEAN the Iguanadon wasn't born with a horn? Try again! We shan't have inaccurate dinosaurs in OUR gallery of amusements!"

Oh hey, I came up with a better idea. Jurassic Park... but instead of a dinosaur zoo, it's a ren faire. Clone a bunch of medieval-era Englishmen. Raise them Truman Show-style, without ever knowing that it's the year 2015. It's even easy to make it as inaccurate as Jurassic Park—just leave out anyone who isn't white, like Hollywood does! Or, y'know, mix in frog DNA. Whatever works.

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Makaru

Oh hey, I came up with a better idea. Jurassic Park... but instead of a dinosaur zoo, it's a ren faire. Clone a bunch of medieval-era Englishmen. Raise them Truman Show-style, without ever knowing that it's the year 2015. It's even easy to make it as inaccurate as Jurassic Park—just leave out anyone who isn't white, like Hollywood does! Or, y'know, mix in frog DNA. Whatever works.

 

 If I may... Um, I'll tell you the problem with the scientific power that you're using here, it didn't require any discipline to attain it. You read what others had done and you took the next step. You didn't earn the knowledge for yourselves, so you don't take any responsibility for it.

 

You stood on the shoulders of geniuses to accomplish something as fast as you could, and before you even knew what you had, you patented it, and packaged it, and slapped it on a plastic lunchbox, and now

 

teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles-smash-up-20

 

You're selling it, you wanna sell it. :)

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Portalfig

I feel like you would enjoy the most recent xkcd, Saruyama. (#1527, future readers)

 

Not entirely sure I can link it, though? Also on mobile so.

 

Yeah. First thing I thought of was you, haha. You've succeeded in making your campaign for dinosaurs etched into my brain and now I will probably never be able to enjoy these movies, of which I have seen none.

 

I think your plan is working.

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believe victims

I feel like you would enjoy the most recent xkcd, Saruyama. (#1527, future readers)

 

Not entirely sure I can link it, though? Also on mobile so.

 

Yeah. First thing I thought of was you, haha. You've succeeded in making your campaign for dinosaurs etched into my brain and now I will probably never be able to enjoy these movies, of which I have seen none.

 

I think your plan is working.

 

A friend of mine also recommended it to me (though I also regularly check xkcd because it's one of the many webcomics I follow.) It's excellent.

 

Also considering my plan is to get people to think critically about dinosaur movies, *stands in front of a Tyrannosaurus skeleton with my hands making peace signs with a big Mission Accomplished banner*

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