Jump to content
  • entries
    47
  • comments
    248
  • views
    47,944

Writing Style Experiment


They

1,431 views

Hey BZPower! As a writer, style is very dear to my heart. Another thing dear to my heart is having fun. While I was working on some basic sentence manipulation exercises this evening I had a thought: wouldn't it be cool to see how different people treat the same sentence? Yes, yes it would! :D

 

Take the following sentence and modify it stylistically. Yes, feel free to add a bit more detail, but the main focus of this little game is how you manipulate what's already here.

 

"The shore was quiet and the water was still and a soft light glittered across the black surface."

 

GO! What will you do?

  • Upvote 3

19 Comments


Recommended Comments

So, I take it the rules are to keep it as one sentence?

 

I'll give it a shot, Billy.

 

The waters of the silent shore stood still as light danced softly upon the surface of its deep, dark depths.

Link to comment

The shore was deathly quiet, the waters an unnaturally placid mirror, revealing the glittering light of the stars in the dark depths of the water below.

Link to comment

The shore was quiet, deathly quiet--as quiet as a tired beach, or perhaps a sleeping coast, one could say--since the water that usually beat against it so earnestly was this night so flaccid and lazy one was inclined to wonder how many swimmers it had swallowed this day (surely a sizable amount, for it sat in a satisfied, full stupor) and, reflecting off the dark, murky surface, the indifferent glance of the moon illuminated the ocean with the same enthusiasm the water showed in loud and rapid movement.

 

?????

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment

I stared out at the deathly silent shore; it was eerily calm (never a good sign in my experience) and the only disturbance being the shimmers of light that contrasted its dark depths.

 

I tried.

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment

It was a quiet shore, with black waters murmuring calmly against the sand as silver light danced smoothly across the surface.

 

I may use that one day...

Link to comment

Soft lights glittered across still, ebon waters that merely tickled the quiet and peaceful shore.

 

 

idk

Link to comment

Across the still waters, a light glinted across the surface, visible from the silent shore.

 

-TNTOS-

Link to comment

The shore was quiet, the water still, the stars soft and light, and there was absolutely nothing to do here why am I stuck on this Nui-forsaken rock?

  • Upvote 5
Link to comment

The water on the shore was calm and still as the soft light of the moon illuminated its inky surface. A lone pier shot out into the austere depths, creaking under the soft eddies, waiting patiently for a visitor, as it had for so long.

The wind soon began, whisking the faintest granules of sand up and skittering madly across the splintered wood of the pier. As the gusts grew, the water began to stir from its slumber and lash up against the pier, threatening to take the structure down once and for all.

Before it could, a lone hat blew from the shore onto the pier, affixing itself firmly onto one of the supporting poles.

The wind gusted once more, in a final and desperate attempt to dislodge the hat from its newfound perch, but every time it tried, the hat became all the more stubborn. Defeated, the wind retreated, doubtless planning to strike another day.

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment

The shore was quiet on that dark night, as the glistening light of the stars illuminated the water's waves. Nobody thought that it would be the day when a meteor fell down into the bay, raising gigantic tidal waves and, even more importantly, a cloud of gas and ash of simply grandiose proportions into the skies, spreading through the atmosphere and causing nuclear winter, what in turn led to massive changes in the Earth's climate.

 

And that, kids, is why we have no dinosaurs.

-Dovydas

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment

The eerie silence in the air was like a migraine, pressing in from all directions as the black tongues of the ocean stood still. There was little the moon's light could do but skip across its back, an ineffective remedy to the nothingness that assailed us.

Link to comment

The sole disturbance to the shore's silence was the susurrus of the sea's gently breaking waves, striking the stones of the bay with a gentle ferocity as the stars stared down upon them.

 

...

 

sibilance

 

- Indigo Individual

Link to comment
Guest
Add a comment...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...