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The Apathy Pit


Well, That's Just Cruel

Posted by The Present Automaton , Jun 20 2012 · 151 views

As a way of trying to restore some of the damage I do to my bank account with my random splurges, I proceeded to put the £40 I had lying around into it. Then on my walk around town before my first lesson in college, I realised I saw a book I'd been looking for for only £3 and realised I needed cash. The minimum I could take out was a tenner, but it still felt like a mockery to my efforts. Going through Sainsbury's, I then got the idea someone was deliberately taunting me as I found the Metroid Prime trilogy on the Wii that I'd been putting off Other M until I could play. Not that I'm actually excited about playing Other M after seeing what Samus has become. Luckily I managed to resist temptation. Then did something perhaps a little wrong, but still ensured that nobody would find it but I. I hid it behind a bunch of point and click PC games. Good luck finding it there, proper gamers! Well, after that all was going swimmingly until I went into WHSmiths and saw their weekly offer. £2.99 on John Connolly's The Burning Soul if I buy a copy of The Times. This newspaper I then forgot in the study area of my college and have never since been able to work out its fate. Huh, I guess I'll never know.

I really get the idea that the more I actively try to resist buying stuff, the more tempting the world around me becomes. Saving for university is going to be hard.


On Comics

Posted by The Present Automaton , Jun 16 2012 · 150 views

Before I start, allow me to throw a moment of celebration, having finally updated The Best Kept Secrets after about two gosh darn months of inactivity. Good Lord, that was bad of me. Still, if you're interested, I implore you to check it out. If not, that's fine by me.

Now, as for the subject, I recently updated my status with a thought that had been going through my head. I decided this blog entry would go a little further into depth on the matter and probably end with a request from any skilled comic writers.

I've been doing some pondering lately. Mulling over a couple of ideas, mostly plans for short stories and epics. But I've had one certain thought popping up repeatedly lately that I've gradually grown fonder of, as an idea. And that's a comic. Y'know, I used to make comics, back in the day. A few years ago, when I was trying my hand at literally everything. On retrospect, they weren't good comics, but hey, I gave it a shot. But the thing is, the comics I create if I got around to it, would be nothing like the ones I used to rush out.

No, what I'm thinking of is something of a more melancholic atmosphere. Melancholy is one of my favourite emotions, and words as well, and when done right, can be amazing. It was done perfectly in NieR, Adrian Von Ziegler can compose some pretty melancholic music and the webcomic Pictures For Sad Children fit this to a 't'. I'm not sure if it still does, the latest comics have made me feel uncertain. But the one thing I don't have in common with all of these aforementioned sources of melancholia is experience. I don't think I've ever created anything melancholic before, so that's what I'd like to try. Whether I succeed or not is another matter but that's the whole point of learning.

The only thing that stands in my way is the medium of comics itself. What I'd want to do is hand drawn, but I still consider myself incapable of putting pencil on paper to produce a satisfying finished piece. That leaves me with the other option, sprites. To use them I'd have to use sprite kits, which I honestly have nothing against. The only issue is that I'm limited in what I can do with them, I can't really experiment with angles, poses, all that. It makes the whole thing look curiously static. Y'know, more static than a still image usually does. Then there's the issue of backgrounds, which I certainly wouldn't be capable of creating, so would have to scrounge them up from around the net.

But onto the subject of the plot, the idea is fairly simple. The protagonist wakes up in a world they don't recognise and explores it. Unlike most comics I've read, this one will be slower paced and, most importantly, quieter. Don't get me wrong though, I've nothing against light-hearted comic writers. If you can make something funny, you've got a skill and I don't look down on anyone for that. I'm just trying to mix things up, add a touch of grey to a vibrant, colourful pool.

So, I guess what I'm asking is, if I go ahead with this, would any of you read this? Would you be interested in reading such a potentially bleak comic? Also, if anyone out there has advice in regards to the artstyle and backgrounds dilemma, it would be greatly appreciated.


Never Mind

Posted by The Present Automaton , Jun 15 2012 · 117 views

After requesting to take up a new subject and getting refused it looks like that wasn't an option after all. I guess all I've got is to do Film Studies and hope for the best.


What, So My Choice Is "or Death"?

Posted by The Present Automaton , Jun 14 2012 · 149 views

Y'know, I'm glad I go to college for all the useful and exciting things I learn. Todays hard-earned fact has been how it turns out you can't beatbox Kevin MacLeod's The Cannery. Not that I can beatbox, but hey, I could always discover some hitherto unknown hidden talent for making crazed noises with my mouth in the style of a song involving some rather maniacal piano tunes.

So I consulted some of the lecturers around my college about a certain issue regarding my A2 subjects. I'm aware that taking both Film Studies and Business Studies has been a massive mistake in my life and one I've come to regret. Don't get me wrong, I love the former with a passion, but most universities, on the other hand, don't. That would mean I'm meant to carry Business Studies into A2 which I've realised I intensely dislike and have no motivation. So my choice is continue a subject I enjoy but won't be regarded as a real qualification, or take a subject I have no interest in and probably get a lacklustre grade in it, though with the benefit of it being considered by universities. However, after some discussion with my tutor I've found I might have a third option which is to drop both subjects and take up the AS and A2 level of a whole new subject at the same time. Naturally that comes with risks of its own, such as how much time that'll take up and all the extra pressure I'll suffer, but it's interesting to consider. The question stands though, what I'd take up. Maths? Law? History? Psychology? Sociology? All strong competitors and some strongly relevant to my interests.

Of course, what's disappointing about that idea is I'd have to give up Film Studies, even though I just found out my coursework was an essay and presentation on a particular subject of our choice. I was considering the star signification of Jack Black.



Posted by The Present Automaton , Jun 12 2012 · 141 views

Jim Carrey made it look so easy in Yes Man. Turns out you can't play it all that well by flailing your legs like a panicked deer. Still amazingly fun though.

False life of the automaton

Ontario, Canada

English Literature

Creative Writing


Video games.

Complaining about video games.

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