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Kraggh's Works ♫♪



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Forced Puns

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Movies, Humor Dec 18 2017 · 18 views
STAR WARS
:kaukau: Hey, I think that it was a huge mistake for Ben to become an enemy of his own father. You should never make a foe pa like that.

That spot where Rey stabbed Ben in the chest healed impectably fast.

The Resistance will Carrie on.

I'm a Kelly Marie Fan of the new character. She really Rose to the occasion.

Chewy has no money to eat expensive food and is a porg guy.

♫♪ Poe Rey Shmi Finn Solo Tico ♫♪


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Slideshow Articles

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Sep 23 2017 · 71 views

:kaukau: I absolutely have slideshow articles, and I'm going to tell you in detail why. Are you ready?

                                                                                                                                       NEXT >


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My Campaign Slogans

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Sep 22 2017 · 75 views
humor
:kaukau: I've decided that in three years I'm going to run for President of the United Mates. Lovely group of people who are all buddies and all get along with each other. Here are some of the campaign slogans that I'm considering:

"Read my lips: no new nucular weapons. . . please applaud."

"Jean!"

"They hate us cause they ain' us."

"We are number one! Hey! Hey!"

"POWAAAAAH! UN-LI-MI-TED POWWAAAAAAH!"

"Dew it!"

"I'm never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around. . . except when I'm running for president."

"Life is full of regrets. What's one more?"

"We have cookies."

"Trussst in meeeee, jusssst in meeeee."

"Because I'm not the other guy."

"Because I'm a woman furry."

"Increase circulation of money. Build a MALL!"

"You know you want to."

"I won't make any promises."

"I promise that I'll do something."

"With great presidents comes great responsibility."

"Pick me like you pick your nose."
"I am the one who knocks."

"On the bright side, at least it can't get any worse."

"I AM THE SENATE PRESIDENT!"



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Othello minus the t

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Sep 19 2017 · 89 views

:kaukau: Is "O hello."

A Shakespearean adaptation brought to you by and starring Tommy Wisseau.

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The Boom

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Sep 02 2017 · 96 views
The Room, humor, parody
:kaukau: "I did not nuke them. It's not true! That's fake news. I did not nuke them. I did naaaaaht! . . . O hai, Kim." -- Donny

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Terms and Conditions

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Jul 20 2017 · 97 views
Morgan Freeman
:kaukau: I figured out how to get people to pay attention to them. High profile sites with a budget should hire Morgan Freeman to read them out loud.

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Goals in Life

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Jul 06 2017 · 133 views
stupid humor
:kaukau: I'm a simple man, and I want simple things.

1. Become a rabbi.
2. Wear the skin of Leonardo DiCaprio on my face.
3. Climb Mount Everest naked (except for the part where I'm wearing Leonardo DiCaprio's skin)
4. Play four-square with Kim Jong-un, Steven Hawking, and the Pope.
5. Successfully eat bugs
6. Board a moving train by horseback
7. Walk across the country with an elephant.
8. Get a job at McDonald's.
9. Win an Oscar for my authentic method acting of a McDonald's employee (I was the only method actor humble enough to take the role)(Also, it helps that I was wearing DiCaprio's face)
10. Sharks with FREAKING LASER BEAMS ATTACHED TO THEIR HEADS. I could compromise for mutated sea bass.

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28th Amentment: The Presidential Dog

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Jun 13 2017 · 75 views
humor, poplitics, dogs, dog
:kaukau: A well-regulated emotional health, being necessary for the president's ability to govern, the need for the president to keep and bear a social animal as a pet shall be enforced.

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How to be a Reporter in 2017

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor Jun 03 2017 · 56 views

:kaukau: Find a tweet by a celebrity. Take screenshots of a dozen or so responses to the tweet.

???

Profit.

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Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Posted by Jean Valjean , in Humor, Events May 05 2017 · 156 views

:kaukau: This opening week in May has been real busy with an onslaught of special days. May 1 was May Day (also, if you were living in the Midwest, it snowed on that day). May 4 was Star Wars Day. And now we've reached the end of this crazy week of holidays, and we reach the most special day of them all...


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Me

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Username: Jean Valjean
Real name: N/A
Age: 23
Gender: Male
Heritage: Half Dutch, 25% Hungarian, 12.5% Swedish, 6.25% German and Irish
Physical description: Looks like the eleventh Doctor
Favorite food: Chicken, turkey, and beef.
Least favorite food: Vegetables of any kind
Favorite band: Queen
Favorite singer: Billy Joel
Favorite song: American Pie
Favorite movie: Schindler's List
Favorite TV show: Smallville & Arthur the Friendly Aardvark
Favorite play: Les Miserables
Favorite color: Silver
Second favorite color: Brown
Favorite board game: Risk
Favorite athlete: Michael Phelps
Lucky Number: 53
Past-times: Writing, reading, politics, drawing
Political party: Republican
Religion: Christian
Language: Not English, but American.

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