Omegafest: Levacius Day
Entry posted by MT Zehvor
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Here's Lev's day. Don't have a lot of time so I won't comment on it right now.
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Lightning Elemental Commander: Sir, it’s your time slot. Are you ready?
Levacius: I was born ready. Tell the troops to put on a presentation. We’re thinking Iron Man 2 here.
Lightning Elemental Commander: We have one problem. The bus full of Ga-Matoran got shot down.
Levacius: How does a bus get shot down?
Lightning Elemental Commander: Very carefully.
Levacius: *Sigh* Do we have anyone else that could do it.
Lightning Elemental Commander: We could have the female elementals do it.
Levacius: Okay, I’ve had you guys for a long time now, and I never knew you had genders.
Lightning Elemental Commander: What did you think we were, sir, amoebas?
Levacius: You’re composed of energy, and you’re created upon the death of another as a reincarnation. Seeing as the only reason you have the body shape of a toa is because of a manifestation of my will, I didn’t realize the need to have gender was in your species.
Lightning Elemental Commander: Sir, don’t over think these things.
Levacius: Fine, I’ll do this show without the fireworks and Ga-Matoran… *Walks out*
Greetings, attendees to Omegafest! I’m glad to see everyone who could make it here did make it here. As anyone who has seen my blog, the Lightning Realm, will have already found out, I am working on two comedies and one epics at the time.
In three days time, on Monday the 31st of October at 5 PM pacific time, I will put up the first chapter of the comedy Bionicle in 300 Words. This comedy is fueled by randomness injected with fifteen gallons (because we refuse to use the metric system) of liquid sugar. Each year of Bionicle is parodied in 300+ words. Maybe 600 or so. Because you all have chosen to attend this event, I have the first chapter here three days early for you to enjoy.
CHAPTER 1 - 2001 in 571 Words
BEACH OF MATA-NUI
Tahu: *Wakes up* Where am I. *Picks up sword* This is heavy. *Puts on mask* Wow, now I have super powers! (he walks off into the burnt forest)
BURNT UP FOREST
Tahu: Gee, this seems like a great idea, going through a forest. *Spike trap comes up* Ah! Spikes! *Cuts spikes with fire sword*
Jalla: *Gasps and pops up* He has a sword! And can set things on fire! He must be the hero who will save us! Take him to Vakama!
(Matoran escort him to Vakama)
TA-KORO
Vakama: Tahu, you must save the island.
Tahu: Why?
Vakama: Becuase, you have to. Makuta is evil, becuase he has shadow as a power.
Tahu: Oh, okay. How do I do that.
Vakama: Find the Kanohi masks. And remember - gotta catch 'em all.
LATER, SOMEWHERE
Kopaka: I hate my life. And you.
Pohatu: ... and so then I said, like, "Hewkii, you're never going to be a toa, so, like, shut up" but he was all "I'm gonna be a toa like you and I'm gonna save your sorry but". As if... hey look, other toa!
Tahu: *Looks up from talking to Gali, Onua, and Lewa* Hey look, other toa.
Kopaka: We should kill them.
Pohatu: OTHER TOA! *Runs at them with arms open wide*
A FEW BEATINGS LATER
Lewa: *Acts goofy*
Tahu: ... so we gotta catch 'em all.
Gali: How do we catch them?
Tahu: Well, there are these evil monsters guarding them, and we beat them up and take the mask from them.
Lewa: Whee!
Onua: We have to beat he who must not be named.
Pohatu: Who's that?
Onua: He cannot be named.
Tahu: You mean Makuta?
Island: *Splits in half as a giant shadowy storm whips up and Cthulu rises from the ocean, then comes back together and Cthulu goes back underwater*
Onua: Don't say his name!
LATER
Kopaka: *passes out from being hit by a block of ice*
Wairuha: You must fuse together to become me!
Kopaka: *Wakes up and looks down* Shoot, this ice block is melting. *Jumps and almost lands in the lava*
Lewa: Yay! *Saves him*
EVEN LATER
Tahu: Alright, we have all the masks...
Gali: Yep.
Tahu: And we're entrusting a group of matoran to defend our backs so we aren't eaten.
Jaller: Yep.
Takua: I'm the chronicler!
Jaller: Shut up *slaps him*
Tahu: Alright, lets throw all of our masks away on these statues! *Places masks on statues with other toa*
Golden Masks: *Appear*
Tahu: Yay! Our masks our gold now! *Puts on and walks into the Mangaia*
Lewa: How is this better-gooder? *Follows*
SLIGHTLY AFTERWARDS
Gali: AH! Crabs!
Manas Army: *Attack*
Tahu: Quick, form Voltron and use the sword to attack the pillars! Defeat the robobeast!
*Toa form into the toa Kaita*
Akamai: Bust ALL the pillars! *Attacks the pillars*
Waihura: My name sounds like a girls. *Attacks the pillars*
Manas: *Go asleep*
Akamai: *As Waihura walks onwards* Wait... so we're not going to finish them off?
A SHORT WALK LATER
Takua: *Following* I'z a stalker!
Toa Kaita: *Split into six*
Tahu: What is this I don't even...
Matoran: *Appears*
Lewa: Ah! Creepy matoran!
Makuta Matoran: I'm the bad guy. Rawrgh. *Turns into a mask in a pool of shadow*
Tahu: Combine your powers! *Attacks the Makuta shadow pool*
Other Toa: *Do the same thing*
Makuta: Oh no! Six toa defeated me, even though I have 42 plus powers, can create an army, and am basically an evil god. Gee, are they really that dumb they think this can beat me? *Fades away*
Tahu: Yay! We're dumb and we won!
Other Toa: Yay! *Leave Mangaia*
Takua: Ooh, look, teleporter! Ooh, look, Bohrok! *Uses Teleporter as Bohrok wake up* Ooh, look, Vakama by the water.
Vakama: Oh hi Takua! Good job! Now get away from me you red and blue freak!
Takua: Fine...
END
And so you guys can see just how silly and bad this comedy is going to be. Hopefully it will at least attract attention, to get some viewers for when I run my next comedy. Now, Bionicle in 300 Words will be posted on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Three days a week. This will continue on for three weeks. On the fourth week, 2010 and 2011 will both be written on Wednesday.
The week following will debut the opening of The Bionicle House.
The date is December 31st, 2012. The world didn’t end. Luckily. Or sadly. Depends on who you ask. A young boy, son to the rich human Ronald Kruntz, has recently read about a thing called BIONICLE, and had his father buy the LEGO company. And, in addition, every single BIONICLE toy ever made, including all special editions he could get his hands on.
But what nobody expects is what was about to happen on that day. December 31st, 2012. The day when… the BIONICLE sets of Kruntz Mansion came to life!
This sums up the basic opening idea behind everything happening. The Bionicle House will probably be written into up until I leave for college, and will start off with on room, then the whole floor, until eventually they find their way out past the mansion. Hero Factory will not be a feature, and the HF fans cried.
The Bionicle House will be posted every Monday anywhere from 4-8 PM PST. As such, some will not see it until Tuesday thanks to differing time zones.
For anyone interested on other things I’m doing, I’m finishing up my RPG submission for December ATM, and I’m also working on an epic called All Cardinal Points.
- - - - - SPECIAL - - - - -
To all participants of Omegafest;
I will be featuring no Guest Stars in The Bionicle House up until it’s had a reasonably long run. We’re talking, like, 15 chapters. However, I will be featuring PGS’s that may appear from Chapter 6 and forward.
The form is here –
Member:
Name:
Weapons:
Powers:
Appearance:
These forms may be PMed.
Any number may be sent, but it’s open only to those who attended Omegafest. Which is you, if you’re reading this.
Thank you MT for letting me do this presentation.
Questions?
-Toa Levacius Zehvor
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-MT
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