Jump to content
  • entries
    85
  • comments
    216
  • views
    63,507

Hostility


Pomegranate

2,590 views

What is it about plastic construction toys that make people so unpleasant?

 

I'm just trying to have fun and talk about magic robots but I spend most of my time tiptoeing around battlegrounds and eternal grudges, heated disagreements about things nobody has any business even caring about, avoiding saying the wrong keyword of the week like I'm avoiding a landmine, lest it revive a nasty discussion whose only real conclusion is the immediate and permanent derailment of any topic, or get myself on someone's naughty list and see my name pop up in random places in unflattering contexts.

 

I go to BZPower, tumblr, other unsavory and unfriendly sites, anywhere to just find a safe haven, but all the same calamities of the day are being blown up everywhere in addition to the general nastiness due to all the rivalries.

 

Do you have a personal vendetta against someone for whatever reason? Private message them and sort it out, instead of vagueblogging and making nasty passive aggressive remarks about them in all your comments and topics on BZPower, and waging all out war across several other platforms. Have a strong opinion about the Matter of Pure Personal Preference of the Week? Post to your heart's content in the relevant topic, but don't inject it into every other discussion, or cram it down anyone's throats and be extremely bitter about it for the rest of time, waiting for someone to bring it up again. Hate an entire community? Stop visiting it and ignore it like a rational person, instead of obsessing over everything they do and actively complaining about it and attacking anyone and everyone associated with it.

 

Keep it to yourself, or keep it between yourself and your target, and for broader issues keep it where it belongs and don't say it more than it needs to be said. It saturates and pollutes the entire community and it ruins the fun for everyone else.

 

There's a time and place for everything. It'd be nice if the default wasn't "all the time" and "most places". The Bionicle fandom has been more vile than ever, lately, and it's not even for anything actually Bionicle related, usually. Either lighten up or deal with your issues directly because the rest of us shouldn't have to see all the negativity and be left with no choice but to: join in on it and argue with the rest and get drawn into a nasty, hostile war; stay quiet and not enjoy ourselves, watching everything go horribly wrong around us; or just leave and find someplace nicer.

 

I'm close to just leaving. Lord knows I'm tired of the negativity and the hostility and trying to defend friends or diffuse arguments or avoid the hot buttons, and I definitely can't stand just watching everything go down and hang around and associate myself with it. Maybe I'll just buy my sets, watch my webisodes, post my fanart when I make it, and not check in on anything the rest of the time. I don't have it in me to start fresh with another (hopefully much more pleasant) core of the fandom, like the Russians.

 

Mata Nui, give me strength. I've tried so hard to ignore it and be patient and stay for the good stuff. Don't make me regret coming back in the first place.

  • Upvote 21

21 Comments


Recommended Comments

Right now I'm only into Bionicle for the sets. I used to like the community, but some of the vileness I've seen has been off-putting. People frequently going off-site to write passive aggressive blogs about somebody behind their back is not what I see as healthy in a good fandom. It's a shame, since people like that ruin it for the rest of us.

  • Upvote 3
Link to comment

See, this is why my involvement in the Bionicle community has remained contained to BZPower itself (outside of steam and skype chats with other members). If anybody is writing stuff about me, I figure I'll find out eventually, but if I don't find out I don't care, and if I do... well, congrats to them, I guess?

Link to comment

I agree with this so much. Even though I'm probably more guilty of it than a lot of people. I do try to keep disputes onsite, but that's less out of principle and more because, when I have seen discussion about my posts or opinions offsite, it's not usually good things. :(

 

I'm trying to do better. Recently I developed somewhat of a vendetta with another member here, and ever since a staff member called me out on it I've tried to use the only conflict-avoidance method that's ever really worked for me—just trying my best to ignore that member's posts. So far, it's working—when I keep myself from getting riled by their most offensive or inaccurate opinions, I've even found that some of their more positive posts are actually funny or clever.

 

Anyway, none of this probably matters to you, but I'd personally hate for you to leave. If decent members like you are driven off by the flaws of the community, those flaws are only going to get worse. As it is members like you are what keep the community strong and make it one of the brightest parts of this point in my life.

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment

It has been my observation that fandoms, as they age, become increasingly volatile – sort of like how rotting fruit spoils. I fear the bonkle fandom has reached that point. I can’t say I’ve ever really been that active in the community, but it’s always been dear to me. That being said, it saddens me that such a degree of toxicity has found its way into a fandom devoted to children’s toys. I more or less have the same stance as you, at this point. Although, hopefully the reboot will infuse the fandom with some much needed positivity from new members.

 

Adieu,

~ MechaFizz

Link to comment

But don't you know it's far too sensible to actually try talking to someone you have a problem with? Why bother with that when you can create blogs dedicated to hating and making fun of them? That's obviously a better way of handling things.

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment

Pom, you're one of the most level-headed, positive posters I've seen around.  That you feel this way speaks loads about the community, and not in a good way.

 

At the end of the day, I guess it comes down to more people being like you and less like the stuff you've mentioned.  It can be easy to slip up - I'd be lying if I said I've never had dislike towards some members or groups, and I know there have been times when I could have handled said dislike better - but I wish more people had the same viewpoint that you do.

 

(If nothing else, MST3K gives words of wisdom, as always: "it's just a [toy line], I should really just relax.")

  • Upvote 4
Link to comment

My dad talks a lot about the "10% Dirtball Factor." Basically, within any large and diverse group of people, around ten percent will be ... well, dirtballs.
 
While I—like anyone else—have my own views as to who is right and wrong, I try not to let it get in the way of actual civility. Going after people with backwards views on things isn't going to help, regardless of when or where or why—and that goes for anywhere, not just this fandom or the Internet as a whole.
 
I would point out that most of the hostility I've seen is Tumblr-centric. Not that there's not drama on BZPower, but the amount has decreased over the past few years, and I think it says a lot about the overall maturity of this site (in comparison to others) that we can have reasonable debates.
 
For example, I don't think that the "GAY KISSING CONTROVERSY" of the olden times would be nearly as much of a forum-wide explosion of flared tempers and administrative action if it happened today.
 
Fandoms in general are strange things. Many I've seen (and nearly every one I've ever considered myself a member of) go through bouts of drama. The only way the fandom stays alive, though, is through the persistence of members who want to keep order and not let a split actually tear the fandom apart. Losing you would be just that much more of a loss in the face of the forces whose only seeming goal is to sow seeds of discontent against their ideological counterparts.

  • Upvote 3
Link to comment

Friend, you have taken words I have had in my head for months and said them in a much more eloquent fashion than I would have. Believe me when I say you're not alone in your observations or in your frustrations.

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment

I was literally thinking of posting something very similar to this...but you took the words right out of my mouth. Bravo, Pomegranate. You've said something that's needed to be said for such a long time. 

 

(I'm also catching a bit of irony in a few of these comments...)

 

-Rez

  • Upvote 3
Link to comment

(I'm also catching a bit of irony in a few of these comments...)

Funnily enough I was thinking the exact same thing.

 

I feel out of the loop. Who's got beef with who now? Is it people on the Twitters or something?

It's more an issue with Tumblr and people using theirs to spread hatred about other members without having to confront them.
  • Upvote 3
Link to comment

It's more an issue with Tumblr and people using theirs to spread hatred about other members without having to confront them.

Spreading hatred? Isn't that just standard for Tumblr? ;) Thanks for the clarification!

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment

I don't think it has anything to do with plastic construction toys. I think it's just the fact that wherever a bunch of adults congregate and interact, there's bound to be conflict. The thing is, adults should be able to resolve that conflict in a mature, effective and constructive way, without it turning into drama. When it turns into drama, that's when I leave.

 

-L

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment

I agree with everything in yonder blog entry. Yeesh, we're here to discuss Bionicle, already, without dragging in all of our other personal issues in here?

 

I may not agree with all of your opinions, Pom, but I most certainly agree with this one. All the dissension/mess actually started in the blogs (where it made sense that it would be allowed, since the blogs are about real-life stuff), and then it slowly spread to the forums, where it has settled in to poison a lot of otherwise civil discussions and spawn golems of its own. I goofed up and made it worse. 

 

Hopefully it will soon end. I'm overly tired of debating it, and without me to feed the flames and act like an idiot hopefully all of this will soon die.

 

:(

Link to comment

I said this in Letagi's entry too, but this is super weird to me. I've been on BZP since 2002, and this is the most mellow the place has ever been. When BIONICLE was running the first time, there were near-weekly flareups about the sets, story direction, etc. These topics would be in GD or in the news forum or the BIONICLE sets forum, and would last for pages and pages. They weren't any less angry or divisive as other things here are now. I think you guys are projecting a bit, to be honest.

Link to comment

I think the forums were even more mellow around 2011-2013ish than even the 2010 flame wars. With the gender things, it's become more flamey than that extremely mellow period, and now people are commenting on it. 

 

Of note is that many of these debates aren't even about Bionicle, like previous animosity - it's about people's feelings on certain controversial subjects. That can cause inflation of said animosity in people's minds more than any Bionicle discussion could ever do.   

Link to comment
Guest
Add a comment...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...