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The Notorious RBG

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Jean Valjean


:kaukau: Red, blue, and...green.


When we were kids, we thought that we had it all figured out. We knew that the primary colors were red, blue, and yellow. All other colors came from these three. Our kindergarten art teachers told us so, and who better qualified to give us such truisms than them?


Then we made it to fifth grade. We landed ourselves in a class with a science teacher who also had something to say about color, and she contradicted our art teacher. The three primary colors were not what we were taught all along. Our entire lives up until that point had been a lie. Yellow wasn't a primary color? That holy trinity of hues consisted of green?


You squint your eyes. No, it doesn't look balanced. And you can swear that green is a mixture of yellow and blue. It doesn't evenly balance out the color spectrum of the rainbow. It isn't symmetrical? Why, Mrs. Krstowicz, why?


You console yourself with the reminder that your old primary colors are still at least the three primary colors by subtraction. But even then, your middle school art teacher lied to you. She lied to you. The three primary colors of subtraction are actually yellow...and magenta and cyan. Slightly different. You ask your art teacher about it, and she explains that she didn't have confidence in you to grasp such concepts as magenta and cyan. She didn't trust you. She didn't ever trust you.


Then you see Vsauce's video called "This is not yellow," which explains things pretty well, but all that information about RBG pixels only serves to remind you, with a twinge of bitter reflection, of the dishonesty and wiliness of your conniving art teacher, who took advantage of your childish trust to feed you false information of the world. Red-blue-green, destroyer of your childhood memories. If I had never heard of you, I could continue living in my bliss.




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