A Writerly Blog

This is the final preview for my upcoming comedy, BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded, which is coming out tomorow, which is going to be awesome.

So here's the preview, from Chapter 6:


Just before Mata Nui could jump, however, a voice said, "I wouldn't do that if I were you, Mata Nui."

Mata Nui looked around until he spotted a familiar black-armored being standing on the other side of the pit. It was Teridax, who was leaning against the wall on the far side quite casually.

"Teridax," Mata Nui said, immediately raising his gun. "What are you doing here? How'd you know I'd be here?"

"It was easy," said Teridax. "My Rahkshi were but a distraction, the prod necessary to make you come down here and face me. By putting the golden mask down here, I gave you another reason to want to fight me, rather than run away as you have before."

"It was just a lucky guess, then," said Mata Nui. "Right?"

Teridax stomped his foot against the floor. "No, no, no! I planned it all and you fell for it! I'm right and you're wrong! Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!"

"Okay, okay, geez," said Mata Nui, holding his hands up. "Don't have a man, cow . . . wait, I don"t think I got that right."

"Anyway," said Teridax, suddenly regaining his composure. "If you want the mask, Mata Nui, you will have to fight me to get it."

"And if I don't?" said Mata Nui. "What if I just take the mask really fast and escape, before you can stop me?"

"You won't escape," said Teridax as he snapped his fingers.

From out of the tunnels came millions of Rahkshi. They blocked every exit, including the one behind Mata Nui. Mata Nui didn't doubt he could kill them all if he had to (or even if he didn"t have to), but with Teridax being here, it would be far more difficult.

"My Rahkshi will make sure you do not escape before we clash," said Teridax as he unsheathed something that looked like a sawed-off shot gun. "Let us do battle. The winner gets the golden mask. The loser is banished to the pit below."

Teridax pointed at the gaping hole that was opened below the suspended mask. Mata Nui still couldn't see the bottom of it, but he had no fears. After all, he was Mata Nui, the gun-toting, butt-kicking hero of this comedy. How could he, the main character, lose?

So Mata Nui said, "All right, then. Bring it on, Teridax. I don't need the golden armor to beat you."

"Then why are you and your friends trying to get it?" said Teridax.

"Because you better shut your mouth or I'm going to shut it for you!" Mata Nui said as he launched himself into the air.

-

That's the end of the previews. Keep an eye on the Comedies forum tomorrow, Saturday, December 1st, where I will begin posting chapters of TLI on a weekly basis!

-TNTOS-

Here's the sixth preview for my upcoming comedy, BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded, which is coming out in the Comedies forum on Saturday, December 1st. This preview is from Chapter 6:


It was then that Mata Nui heard a hissing noise; a lot of hissing noises, actually. He looked around and realized that he was surrounded by what appeared to be thousands of yellow-armored beings, but they looked nothing like him despite sharing the same armor color.

They looked something like snakes mounted on humanoid bodies. They held two sided shot guns, which would have made them look fierce if they didn’t stand shorter than Mata Nui’s knee. If anything, these newcomers actually looked kind of cute, but that wasn’t on Mata Nui’s mind as he understood his situation.

“Rahkshi,” said Mata Nui, redoubling his grip on his gun. “Teridax’s sons, right?”

The lead Rahkshi hissed. “Yesss. We are hissss sssonsss.”

“Teridax must have gotten busy,” said Mata Nui, looking around. “I mean, look at all of you.”

“Sssssome of ussss are adopted, you know,” said one Rahkshi, sounding like his feelings were hurt. “Actually, mosssst of ussss are.”

“I see,” said Mata Nui. “Well, don’t let anyone tell you that just because you’re adopted that means your dad doesn’t love you. That’s a lie; a deliberate, harmful lie.”

Many of the Rahkshi shed tears at Mata Nui’s words, as though they had been waiting their whole lives to hear such encouraging words. That didn’t quite quell the desire in their hearts to rip Mata Nui limb from limb, but many of the Rahkshi gained a newfound respect for Mata Nui just the same.

“So let me guess,” said Mata Nui as he cocked his gun. “Y’all are gonna kill me, right? Just following your daddy’s orders?”

“Yessss, Mata Nui,” the lead Rahkshi said. “Daddy told ussss to kill you. We must obey our daddy’sssssss wishessss.”

“Teridax must be getting stupid, then,” said Mata Nui. “Thinks a bunch of adopted children can kill me? He’s losing his game, he is.”

That ‘adopted children’ bit enraged the Rahkshi, causing them to jump toward him with frightening speed.


Remember to keep an eye on the Comedies forum on Saturday, December 1st, where I will begin posting TLI. It's going to be awesome.

-TNTOS-

Two days to go until the release of BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded. And as I promised yesterday, here is the fifth preview, showcasing an excerpt from Chapter 5:

  
“Um, I dunno, man,” said Takanuva. “I mean, I think so, but . . . I dunno, man.”

“All we need to do is find the golden armor piece and we’ll leave,” Gresh said as he stopped hopping and skipping. “I was here once in Grand Di-Shogun Land.”

“Really?” said Takanuva. “When was that?”

Gresh frowned. “You know, I can’t seem to remember. Feels like someone took a giant eraser and erased part of my memory away. Think it had something to do with ninjas kidnapping someone and we had to save him or something.”

“Sounds stupid, man,” said Takanuva. “Then again . . . I dunno, man.”

“Well,” said Gresh as he looked around, “I figure the golden armor piece has to be around here somewhere. I have no doubt in my heart that we’ll find it, and when we do, it will be righteous!”

“Dunno, man,” said Takanuva as he picked up a flower and ate it. “I don’t see any golden armor pieces around here, man, but then again, I dunno, man.”


Remember to keep an eye on the Comedies forum on Saturday, December 1st, which is when I will beging posting BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded! Also stay tuned to this blog tomorrow, when I will post Preview #6.

-TNTOS-

Yesterday on this blog I mentioned that I had a job interview with UPS, which was supposed to be today at 11:30 AM. Thing is, the interview was to take place in a town about an hour and a half away from where I lived, which by itself isn't a problem, as I have been to that particular town before, so I simply left around 9:40 to give myself plenty of time to get there in case of unexpected delays or whatever.

The problem came when I tried to figure out where the UPS center was. I tried Google maps to help me find it, but either Google maps was messed up or I am terrible at reading directions because I ended up lost in that town for about an hour or so. I did eventually find the UPS center at around lunch time, but it was closed until 4:30 PM. As I didn't want to wait four hours for the UPS center to open, I decided to just go home, as I had already missed the interview by at least an hour and so doubted I was going to be interviewed at all.

As you can imagine, I'm not in a particularly happy mood right now. I didn't even get to do the interview, so I don't know for sure if I would have been accepted or rejected. I suppose I could call or email them and explain why I didn't show up, but considering the seasonal nature of the position I applied for, I wouldn't be surprised if someone else has already filled it by now.

So, unless something unexpected comes up, it's back to job-hunting again for me, it appears. What joy.

-TNTOS-

Only three days to go until the release of my upcoming comedy, BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded. In the meantime, why don't you check out this hilarious preview? It might give you a couple of giggles at least, so here is the preview from Chapter 5:


“I say we go left,” said Likus.

“Left scares me,” Tera said. “So we go right. Then again, going right scares me, too.”

“If you’re afraid of going right, why do you want to go right?” said Likus.

“Because conforming to other peoples’ opinions scares me,” said Tera.

“All right,” said Likus as he pulled out his air guitar. “Seeing as we can’t agree, how’s about we compromise?”

“Compromise scares me,” said Tera.

“And by compromise,” Likus continued, ignoring Tera, “I mean we’ll just break down this wall and go straight ahead.”

“Breaking walls scares me,” said Tera. “Y-You do it.”

“Then step back,” said Likus, “’cause it’s about to get rock and rolling up in here and you don’t want to be here when it’s rocking and rolling!”

Tera timidly retreated a short distance away as Likus strummed his air guitar. The champion air guitarist suddenly unleashed a string of awesome notes that completely obliterated the wall before them, thus opening a new path for them to go through.

“See, Tera?” said Likus as he strapped his air guitar to his back. “Nothing to it.”


Remember to keep an eye on the Comedies forum for BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded, which is coming out Saturday, December 1st!

-TNTOS-

Earlier today I applied for a part-time position as a Driver Helper at UPS, thinking it might be fun but not expecting anything to come out of it (as all my other job applications at other comapnies have thus far been either ignored or rejected outright).

But about half an hour ago, UPS called me and said that I will have a job interview at 11:30 AM tomorrow for the position I applied for. I'm surprised but pleased at how quickly they got back to me.

This is going to be my first job interview ever, so I'm really nervous but also really excited. Hopefully it'll go smoothly. If it does, I'll have bagged me a job.

Wish me luck for tomorrow, 'cause I'm definitely going to need it.

-TNTOS-

In four days, BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded will be coming to the Comedies forum. In the meantime, however, here is the third preview, an excerpt from Chapter 4:


“So, where is this golden armor piece we’re supposed to be after?” said Tahu. “Oris, you have the map Mata Nui gave us, right?”

Oris nodded, but his head was shivering so badly that he nodded several times. “Y-Yeah. H-Here it i-is.”

Oris pulled the map out of his bag -- quite a feat, considering Oris’s arms were frozen to his sides. He handed the map to Tahu, who unrolled it and looked at it.

Unless Tahu was mistaken, the map appeared to have been drawn with crayon on construction paper. It showed a badly drawn house (labeled ‘HOME’ in big, childishly-drawn letters) and then a squiggly line representing a path leading to a bunch of poorly-drawn mountains (labeled ‘BIG SCARY COLD PLACE’).

All in all, the map made no sense to Tahu whatsoever, so he held it up in front of the sun. Perhaps there was a secret message encoded in it, although knowing Mata Nui’s lack of subtlety, that didn’t seem likely.

It was then that the sun fired a laser beam of energy down at Tahu. Luckily for Tahu, he had coincidentally chosen that exact moment to hold the map up in front of the sun. The laser beam thus struck the map, completely incinerating it.

“Whoa,” said Tahu, blinking. “Didn’t see that coming.”


Keep an eye on this blog for Preview #4, which is coming tomorrow. And remember to keep an eye on the Comedies forum for the comedy itself, which is set to be released on Saturday, December 1st.

Tell me what you think in the comments .

-TNTOS-

It's time for Preview #2 of my soon-to-be released comedy, BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded, which is coming out in six days on Saturday, December 1st. Here is today's preview, from Chapter 5:


“So do we even know the location of the golden armor piece we're looking for?” said Kiina as she and Ackar walked. “Or are we just gonna wander around for days and get nowhere?”

“I know where we’re going,” Ackar said as they walked. “Or, um, actually, I don’t. But I’m sure we’ll find it. The plot demands it.”

“Stupid plot,” said Kiina, folding her arms. “It’s a big bully, making us do all the work while it just sits around and gets praise from everyone for being so clever.”

“Back in my day, plots used to work,” said Ackar. “Nowadays, though, I agree they’ve gotten lazier. It’s like they just don’t care anymore, you know? That reminds me of the good ol’ days before those darn hippies-“

Ackar walked into a signpost that had magically appeared out of nowhere just then. He fell to the ground and cursed, but Kiina ignored him and read the sign, which read thus:

“Do you have what it takes to impress Death himself and win the golden trophy? If you think you can, come to the Death Dome and try your luck at winning eternal glory, bragging rights, and the golden trophy!”

“The Death Dome?” said Kiina. “Hey, Ackar, do you think that golden trophy might be the golden armor piece we’re looking for?”

“I want my prunes,” Ackar replied as he sat up. “You might be onto something, however. We should compete in the Death Dome and see what the prize is.”


Tell me what you think in the comments . Also, remember to check out TLI when it comes out on Saturday, December 1st!

-TNTOS-

I don't know how many people are aware of this, but exactly one week from today, on Saturday, December 1st, I will post the final comedy in the Legend Trilogy, BIONICLE: The Legend Imploded (TLI).

To build up to its release in the Comedies fourm, I will be posting one preview a day starting today and going on through December 1st. Each preview will feature a short excerpt from TLI itself, which should hopefully garner more interest in it or at least give y'all a few giggles at any rate.

And now, without further ado, here is the first preview (from Chapter 4):


“Are we there yet?”

“No.”

“Are we there yet?”

“No.”

“Are we there yet?”

“No!”

Berix and Bucket-head were trekking through the jungle of Bota Magna and Berix had been annoying Bucket-head for the past hour or so by asking the same question over and over again. What made the situation even worse was that Berix was riding on Bucket-head’s shoulders -- something Mata Nui had insisted upon before they’d left, although Bucket-head could see no reason for it other than to humiliate him, as Berix was perfectly capable of walking on his own.

“Well, are we there yet?” Berix asked.

“No!” Bucket-head cried. “What part of ‘no’ don’t you understand?”

“Um, I don’t quite understand the ‘N’ part,” said Berix seriously. “And ‘O,’ that’s very hard. They should make words simpler.”

“’No’ is one of the simplest words ever,” said Bucket-head. “You’re just too thick to realize it.”

“Hey!” said Berix. “I am not that fat.”

“That’s not what I- oh, never mind,” Bucket-head sighed. “Will you please get off my shoulders now?”

Berix picked what was probably a poisonous fruit off a tree and ate it as they passed. “Hmm, I don’t think so. Maybe when we find the cheesy grits I’ll get off.”

“You mean the golden armor,” said Bucket-head. “Right?”

“Cheesy grits, golden armor, whatever,” said Berix. “All the same to me.”


That's all for today. Remember to keep an eye on this blog tomorrow, where I will post the next preview.

Please tell me what you think in the comments section .

-TNTOS-

Happy Thanksgiving to my fellow Americans. I'm going to spend the day with my family, eating turkey, ham, and pumpkin pie, as usual. Won't be eating until later in the day, though, because my oldest brother doesn't get off work until later in the afternoon, but I can wait for turkey and ham (I think ).

Also, for those of you who care, today I successfully hit the 50k mark on my NaNo novel/fanfic, Dawn of the New Century. So I won for the fifth year running, which doesn't surprise me because I know how much I can write in an hour. The fic isn't finished yet, however, and will probably reach 60k or 70k before the month is over. I expect to continue writing it until early December.

I've recently started rereading through my first comedy, My Bionicle Road Trip. It's not very good at all, with at least a dozen storytelling and writing mistakes per chapter, but I'm feeling the nostalgia overwhelm me as I read it. It's amazing how much of it I still remember. I find myself going "I remember that!" in almost every chapter. It's just fun to read with all of its errors and problems, reminding me of just how far I have come since my early days.

-TNTOS-

Recently I have discovered this delightful little website called I Write Like. You basically paste an excerpt of your writing - blog posts, journey entries, comments, chapters of novels, short stories, poems, whatever - and the website tells you which famous writer you write like.

The best part about this website is that you can do it over and over again, having it analyze excerpts of your writing from different stories. This I did and got different results almost every time. Here's the full list, with certain names bolded for emphasis:

J. K. Rowling
Dan Brown
William Shakespeare
Margaret Mitchell
Kurt Vonnegut
James Joyce
Edgar Allen Poe
James Fenimore Cooper
Arthur Clarke
Harry Harrison
Douglas Adams
George Orwell
David Foster Wallace
L. Frank Baum
Rudyard Kipling
Neil Gaiman
H. P. Lovecraft

I always knew J. K. Rowling had an influence on my writing style (whenever anyone asks who I write like, I tend to say Rowling). But Shakespeare? Joyce? And a bunch of other writers, most of whom I have heard about but never read?

I'm thinking I channel the spirit of a different famous writer every time I sit down to write a story. How else can I be Shakespeare in one story and Joyce in another? Or Dan Brown and J. K. Rowling in the same story (Dimension Hoppers, for those of you who are curious)?

Go on and try the website. Tell me what famous writers you write like in the comments below.

-TNTOS-

Just filled out four different job application forms, three of which I just got today. I intend to hand them all in tomorrow and hopefully get a job.

Thus far, I have applied for work at three different places, but none of them have gotten back to me yet, so I'm doubtful about them. No idea if these other places will accept me, but it doesn't hurt to try.

-TNTOS-

Ugh. I woke up with a sore throat this morning, so I slept in a little later than usual. That was nice, but sore throats still aren't fun.

I'm not sure if I'll do any writing for NaNo today. By my calculations, I can miss at least ten days this month and still reach the 50,000 word goal. So if I miss today, it's no biggie.

Edit: Guess I'm not as sick as I thought, 'cause I just did a full hour of writing. Updated my NaNo word count, so I guess I won't be behind after all. Yay and stuff.

-TNTOS-

As of fifteen minutes ago, I cast my first ever vote in the U.S elections. It felt empowering to know that I am contributing to our society in some way, even if the guy I voted for President doesn't win.

So I can now say I have voted. I'll probably vote again come 2016, 'cause it really did feel empowering.

Edit: For those interested, I voted Obama/Biden.

-TNTOS-

Today is the first day of NaNoWriMo, which, for those of you who might not know, goes through the entire month of November, ending at midnight on the 30th.

I put up my NaNo content block in the upper right corner of my blog. As you can probably tell, it tells the name of my story, the current word count, and my feelings about the story. I will probably update it once a day, seeing as I write every day, so if I miss a day it is probably due to sickness or travel.

This is gonna be awesome.

-TNTOS-