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Hi there, while we hope you enjoy browsing through the site, there's a lot more you can do if you register. Some perks of joining include:
  • Create your own topics, participate in existing discussions, and vote in polls
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  • Much, much more!
Enjoy your visit!

Squid in a Cordak Blaster


Dollhouse, why do you do this to me?

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Aug 22 2013 · 642 views

Recently, I've acquired the habit of shrieking things like "No! STAHP! STAHP THE DYING THING!" and "OTP FEEEEEEEELS!" at the TV.

On a completely unrelated note, Vance has been sitting further and further away from me with every new episode. Maybe I need to shower more or something.



Why women's shampoo scares me

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Aug 21 2013 · 1,062 views

Disclaimer: Turakii is in no way supporting the idea that shampoo can be gender-specific and wholeheartedly supports every man's right to use shampoo of every color and scent.


The Magic of 21 (or lack thereof)

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Aug 14 2013 · 1,437 views

When you reach the age of 21, something magical happens.

It's not the first time something magical has happened. Apparently, on your 18th birthday, your chances of exercising pyromania suddenly plummeted, so you were finally allowed to purchase lighters. You also must have lost the ability to grasp simple probability, so you were allowed to purchase lottery tickets too. And being alive 18 years also gave you the right to make valid political decisions! It was a magical time of fire, useless paper, and picking future authority figures based on how cool their last names were.

But when you turn 21, you go through the most magical transformation of all. You finally acquire the responsibility necessary to drink that mysterious, grown-up potion known as... alcohol.

A whole new world of delicious, blissful flavors opens before you! You can finally pop open a can/bottle and have gorgeous models appear around you, or move backwrds in time, or become the most interesting person in the world, just like in the commercials! And bonding with friends no longer requires conversation! Somehow, just because your beverages all contain the same mysterious liquid known as "alcohol"... a true kinship is finally born.

Well, that's what I thought. Except nobody told me something very important about these beverages.



People have certainly tried their best to convince me otherwise. And I'm sure that many drinks are very enjoyable --- if you have an unquenchable thirst for slightly more palatable cleaning fluids.

They've given me wine (which tastes like grape juice, if you made grape juice with mostly disinfectant instead of grapes).

And vodka (which tastes like it's made entirely from disinfectant).

And someone even bought me a shot of whiskey and said it was "the good stuff." Nope, they lied. There was absolutely no "good" involved there whatsoever. (Except maybe good for scrubbing mold off showers or something.)

So, overall, these magical new rights are pretty disappointing. Too bad I can't return them for something cool, like a pet unicorn or wizard powers.



Hey, woah, I exist

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Aug 12 2013 · 793 views


So I was at Brickfair and realized, "Woah, BZP still exists, and so do I, so maybe our existences should coincide more often."
Anyways, I have a story! *Ahem.* Once upon a time there was a member named Turakii who got married to a member named Toa Lhikan Hordika and moved to Santiago, Chile (in South America!) (speaking of which, Chileans get very offended if you call yourself an "American" because they technically are too, so you have to basically call yourself a "United Statian") (Actually, that wasn't really on-topic at all, so just ignore all these parentheses and move on).
Now, Turakii's mother (Macku: Toa of Bubbles) was a very wise bubbly Toa, and she always told Turakii, "When you're shopping, you should never leave your purse in the cart, because someone can just walk by and take it and you won't even notice until you reach the checkout line."
And the very first day Turakii was in Chile that definitely did not happen nope not at all.
But if it had happened (which it definitely didn't), then it would have really sucked for the thief. Most people steal stuff hoping to find money or credit cards or diamond belt buckles or gold teeth and other things that people usually keep in purses. This thief, however, was fortunate enough to walk away with:
  • A cell phone with no coverage in South America (SO MUCH USEFUL)
  • A passport (and they would only need a tiny bit of plastic surgery to make use of it)
  • A New York learner's permit (so if they ever happen to visit New York, they'll just have to find a licensed driver over 21 and they'll be able to drive legally! How convenient!)
  • A couple of books (in English) (the primary language in Chile is Spanish)
But he/she did get my adorable pink purse with the little dead animals printed all over it. =( I just hope they use it well.
Moral of this story: If you're not going to wear your purse on your arm, fill it with all kinds of useless stuff so you can laugh evilly as you imagine the thief sobbing, "Where's the money? Where are the credit cards? Who the heck brings BOOKS to a GROCERY STORE!?"
The End


My Little Pony

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Apr 22 2011 · 859 views

It's not... that... horrible...

*Runs away covering face.*

*Is pushed back to blog by certain someones who will remain unnamed.*

*Ahem.* Soooo... lookaround.gif

Okay, the art and characters are adorable.
Fine, since the characters can actually sing, the songs are bearable.
Sure, it's downright funny at times.
Alright, although it has lessons at the end, they're not sugar-wafer-sprinkle-covered-lessons dripping with chocolate syrup and shoved down your throat by a giggling protagonist.

However, the fact that I found myself watching ten episodes in a day doesn't explain why guys like it (and were the ones insisting I watch it). I mean, I'm a girl. I'm just never going to have as much manliness as the opposite gender. No matter how I deny and ignore its whispers, the Barbie aisle is always going to have some sort of weird pull on me. So the fact that a bouncing, squeaky little pink pony obsessed over lollipops somehow fascinates me isn't entirely surprising.

But men? Men! What happened to you!? My faith in the stronger gender is shattered! ;.;



The Life Of Desmond

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Apr 14 2011 · 444 views

Desmond struggled as they dragged him to the chopping block, but to no avail. They pinned and trussed him firmly. As the axe rose above his head, glinting in the sunlight, his thoughts flew back to all that brought him here.

He was born in a small cabin in Connecticut, surrounded by trees and wildlife. His parents were poor, but their love for him had --THUNK!



My Interests List

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Apr 06 2011 · 407 views

Apparently, my Bionicle alter-ago decided that he'd had enough of my profile selfishly being all about me and wrote out his own backstory in the interests section.

On the bright side, I can now actually locate the bottom of my profile. I thought it was just a legend. =O



Days Of The Week

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Mar 27 2011 · 2,308 views

Guys, did you know that, on Friday, yesterday was Thursday!?

And tomorrow is Saturday!?

And Sunday comes afterwards!? Sunday! Of all things!?

ME NEITHER! =O But thanks to Rebecca Black, I'll never forget again!

I so excited! _icon_joy_.gif



I Have Plastic In My Eyes

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Mar 13 2011 · 653 views

So, after ten years of glasses, I finally decided to try that other option that doesn't involve shooting lasers in my eyes.

Open eye, insert plastic, see clearly without glasses. Sounds simple.

But there's something that never really registers up until that very moment...

Your eye doesn't want plastic in it.

Never mind that you'll be able to see yourself in a mirror from farther than five inches! You're attempting to not only touch your finger to your eye, but insert a foreign object! I don't know about yours, but my eye's total unenthusiastic reaction was basically the following:

"Oh, hi, you took your glasses off! My, things are blurry today, you gonna put those back on? Oooh, tiny little circley thingies... you know, you could probably see them better if you put the glasses back on. No? Oh well, your choice. Hm, those sure are tiny... wait, what are you doing? You can't need to hold them that close, honest, I could see them just fine before... wait! WAIT! Are you aware that you're trying to stuff that in your eye!? OW! Stop it! OW! What are you huffing in frustration for!? I'm the one trying to stop your insanity! I'm --OW!-- warning you! HEY! Just doing my job here!"

So eventually, you physically restrain your eyelids and ignore every cry of sense and reason that they scream at you, and after a few tries you can miraculously see! And then your eye just says, "Hm, this is actually quite nice... ooh, I can make out the pattern of the carpeting and everything... very nice, very nice, so we're just going to keep this in then? I think I can deal with... wait. Wait. NO! You don't need one in the other eye! We're doing just fine here, thank you, and --OW!"

Happily, after almost a week of practice, my eyes and I have reached an understanding. I pry them open and jab the contacts in them, they get to cry and twitch and redden as much as they please, and in the end we both get to see. Win/win situation! =D



Doctor Who Christmas Special

Posted by Turakii #1 Lavasurfer , Jan 07 2011 · 574 views

I saw it before now, honest. Flying fish are awesome.

But anyways, something's been bugging me ever since I saw it... why could Kazran Sardick come in contact with his younger self?

The Doctor Who topic offers the explanation that, since he was changing and becoming nicer, he technically wasn't the same person anymore. The question is, if that applies, how far does the "different person" part extend?

For example, in the Father's Day episode, couldn't baby Rose count as a different person because, unlike older Rose, her father actually made it to the wedding alive? Can the existence of one person make a difference? Or is it only inner changes?

(On another note, if Kazran could remember his past as it changed, why couldn't Rose? Why could she tell her father about him not being there when she and everyone else were, at that time, probably going to be eaten, and thus she'd have no memories?)

Returning to the original topic...

In the fifth Doctor episode Mawdryn Undead, two versions of the Brigadier (the leader of UNIT), from two different times, are unknowingly on the same ship at the same time. The Doctor mentions that if they touch each other, to paraphrase, time would pretty much blow up, or at least suffer serious repercussions. In a marvelous coincidence, when they inevitably touched, it was at the same moment the Doctor was being forced to transfer his remaining regenerations to another person, so all the energy went into that and both time and the Doctor went on their merry way.

But the Doctor wasn't performing anything like that, so why didn't time blow up? D=


Majhost decided all my cool images weren't importa

Also, apparently the titles have character limits.

This square is dedicated to Avohkah Tamer as an everlasting thanks for an everlasting Premier Membership. Thank youuuu! You are super great!

That Turkii Person

Name: Bob
Real name: Robert
Real real name: John Jacob Jingle-Heimer Schmidt
No, come on, man, I'm serious: John Jacob Jingle-Heimer Schmidt III
You think you're really funny, don't you?: Yes =D
You know I can just find it with a quick Google search, right?: Fine, Nose McNosypants.
Name: Christie

Temperament: Phlegmatic/Sanguine, INFP, Hufflepuff... the easygoing slacker who just wants to see everyone get along
Age: Super old. Like 21 or something 23 or something?
Status: Toa Lhikan Hordika's wifey
Power level: Level 26 Cereal Eater
Ancestry: 25% German, 25% Polish, 25% Italian, 13% English, 12% Irish. I am pretty darn white.
Adores: Tangled. All of the Tangled. Punzie is my homegirl <3
Current goal: Not dying. So far, a complete success.
Themesong: Shut Up and Dance - Walk the Moon
Rarely changing quote: "I spent years calling myself broken. One day I realized that humans don't get broken. They get wounded. The difference is that wounds can heal."

Posted ImageNo-longer-broken fanclub link!? You've got to click it to believe it! Posted Image

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