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Before I post anything, I'd like to say that I'm not trying to be controversial with this list, nor am I trying to define anything. I so much as mentioned the list to my mother and she didn't want to read my thoughts because she thought I was trying to come up with some unnatural structure for relationships. I was not trying to accomplish that with this list, nor am I trying to explain exactly what it is I expect in a relationship. However, this list was fun to write since it put me into the mindset of what to do in a healthy and constructive relationship, and it allows me to reflect on what I value. The general subject itself has also formed some interesting conversations. It's a list of ideas, not an agenda of set standards. Again, I have no intentions of constructing artificial relationships.Unfortunately, points 46-53 were all religious, and I know that I want to avoid anything controversial as far as this blog entry is concerned. The point is not to make a strong statement or to start a confrontation, but hopefully to just throw some ideas out there with a positive attitude that some people might find interesting. So the last few items on the list were removed, save for #50.
53 Things a Couple Should Do Before Their First Kiss
1. Go shopping for groceries. Stay on budget and try to give a humorous review of every item in the store (works best in small stores). Use the food to cook a meal for one of your families.
2. Work together to build someone else up, because it’s not just about you.
3. Catch fireflies.
4. Watch fireworks and play with fireworks.
5. Find discarded recyclable items until you fill a bag.
6. Mow a lawn.
7. Climb a tree.
8. Write a long poem.
9. Put a puzzle together.
10. Watch the news and argue with the news commentators.
11.Roast marshmallows over a campfire. Stay up until late at night, then lie on your backs and gaze at the stars.
12. Fly a kite and observe the shapes of the clouds.
13. Visit the library and talk about books.
14. Visit an art gallery. Try to interpret the more abstract art.
15. Play with a dog. Or dogs.
16. Spend time on top of a roof. Fiddle is optional.
17. Draw on the sidewalk with chalk.
18. Make a big sand castle.
19. Go to a place where voices resonate well and sing your hearts out.
20. Attend a concert.
21. Hike on a trail neither has been down before. If you’ve been through all the trails in the local parks, make your own trail by walking through the woods. It’s lovely during autumn.
22. Go for a walk dressed as someone else but act normal. This does not count on Halloween.
23. Dress up on Halloween.
24. Rake the leaves off someone’s yard for free.
25. Visit the elderly at a retirement home.
26. Help raise public awareness of an obscure or ignored cause (such as spending time at retirement homes).
27. Feed birds bread.
28. Do homework together. If you get done too soon, help someone else with their homework.
29. Play a game you’re both good at. This cannot include video games.
30. Play a board game you both enjoy.
31. Try new foods you don’t like.
32. Make fools of yourselves doing something neither of you are good at.
33. Find out your own talents and try to teach them to each other (or at least try).
34. Play card games, and then try to invent a new one. After mastering it, teach it to your families.
35. Decorate a Christmas tree.
36. Go Christmas caroling.
37. Shovel your driveways and make snow forts.
38. Climb snow piles at the local wintertime snow pile dump, and if it’s something you both enjoy you can go sledding.
39. Use up a camera taking beautiful pictures of nature.
40.Fix something broken.
41. Clean a messy room (or rooms).
42. Enjoy the company of other friends.
43. Entertain little kids.
44.Make a cake.
45. When you’re both sad, cry.
46.Go on a mission trip.
...
50. Make a large donation to charity.
Your Honor,
Emperor Kraggh
Y'know, when I first read though this, I was left with the feeling of "I don't agree with all of these" but, when I would try to think of a reason...I honestly couldn't. And now I definitely do agree with all of them. Maybe not that they all have to be done before a first kiss (although I definitely support the idea of waiting a while before a first kiss, and doing a lot of these things), but definitely before engagement. This is awesome, man.
It also really speaks to true love -- if you can do all of this, before even a kiss, then that really means something, and really just shows what that other person means to you. I wish I could go into more detail, but I know that I'll very quickly end up breaking a rule (most likely, religion) if I do, so I'll leave it at that. I definitely want to write an essay about love and relationships one day. I've drafted up about five of them, but every time they start to stray into topics that I can't talk about BZPower, haha. Maybe someday I can write a good entry that stays within the rules.
But seriously man, this is awesome. I know exactly what you mean about not creating an artificial relationship, and I definitely don't think that's what you're doing here. This is just an incredibly beautiful blog entry and thing to do.