Zerothemaster Posted October 14, 2011 Share Posted October 14, 2011 (edited) CHAPTER 1: IN THE BEGINNING ----------------- Bitil: HELP ME I’M GOING TO EXPLODE Ehlek: Takadox: Bitil, what are you talking about? Bitil: I said HELP ME I’M GOING TO EXPLODE Takadox: … Bitil: In large capital letters? Takadox: … Bitil: Hey, Avak. Avak: Ay, laddie? Bitil: What do people who are about to explode do? Avak: Erm… I really dunno, lad, but I would suspect that they would run about in circles and scream. Bitil: *gets up and starts running around in circles* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Takadox: Avak, was that really necessary? Avak: Yes. Bitil: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Antroz: *leaps up and smacks Bitil with a frying pan* Antroz: Hooray for frying pans! Random People In Background: Hooray! Krika: Ummm… Excuse me, guys, but aren’t we supposed to actually do something today? Vhisola: We’re making a comedy, I think. Ehlek: What’s that entail? Vhisola: Well, let’s see. *flips through the latest edition of “Comedies for Dummies”* Well, it says here that we need lots of action hijinx, slapstick humor, witty commentaryand random interjections of randomness. Bitil: YOURS IS THE DRILL THAT SHALL PIERCE THE HEAVENS Ehlek: Vhisola: Randomness, check. Antroz: *Smacks Bitil with a golf club* Antroz: Hooray for 4 irons! Random People In Background: Hooray! Vhisola: Slapstick, check. Takadox: This is really dumb. Vhisola: Who asked you? Takadox: Nobody. Nobody: Yo. Vhisola: Wait, what? Who? Nobody: It’s me! Nobody! Vhisola: How can you be nobody? You have to be somebody! Nobody: No, I’m Nobody. Vhisola: Well, you must be somebody! I can hear you talking! Who are you? Nobody: NOBODY! Vhisola: YOU CAN’T BE NOBODY! Nobody: Forget this, I’m leaving. *Nobody walks away* Krika: *looks up* If nobody left, why did you say anything? Takadox: *facepalm* Ehlek: *looks over Vhisola’s shoulder* I think that counts for “witty commentary”. What else? Vhisola: It says “action hijinx”, but I don’t know where… *suddenly, the wall is smashed by a giant grey figure* Hydraxon: Mwahahaha! I have broken into your fortress! I shall now begin to conquer your studio! Random People In Background: Gasp! Krika: We live in a studio? I never knew that! Cool! Bitil: MY LIFE IS A LIE! *has a nervous breakdown* Avak: Och, be quiet, you oversized brakas monkey. *punches Hydraxon in the face* Hydraxon: Unph! *falls on his back* Random People In Background: Hooray! Krika: Who are those people? Avak: I dunno. Vhisola: Well! That about wraps it up. Thanks everyone! Krika: What? Takadox: That’s all? Vhisola: Yup. Takadox: Seriously? There was no plot, nothing interesting happened, it was just a random sequence of random jokes! Vhisola: *shrugs* so? Takadox: Nobody’s going to like this! We’ll be squashed so quick you won’t be able to blink! Nobody even knows why we’re here! I mean, I don’t even know why we’rehere! We at least need a plot of some sort. Vhisola: *opens her book* Sorry. “Plots and Intelligent Comedy” isn’t until chapter five. Guess we’ll have to wait! Krika: What about prose writing? Vhisola: Silly bear, that’s not until Chapter 34. Ehlek: Avak: *smacks Ehlek* Will you stop it with the blinking already? Vhisola: *looks at watch* Well, as much as I’d love to stay and chat, I have a class in fifteen minutes, so if you’ll excuse me… Takadox: But… wait! We don’t know where to go! I have no clue how I got here! What do we do? Bitil: DO A BARREL ROLL Ehlek: Antroz: *smacks Bitil with… I don’t know, a dictionary?* Antroz: Hooray for… Dictionaries? Random People In Background: Hooray! Avak: What is with those people? Do they have no life? Takadox: *sulking in corner* This stinks. This REALLY stinks. --------------------- I was third then. No need to be mean about it Nope, I was the first; you were the third. THEM'S THE BREAKS. -Smeag Edited October 14, 2011 by Zerothemaster Quote The Drawing Room (Comic) ~ Mata Nui Adventures (Comic)Lost Forgotten Souls (Comedy) ~ Bad Images (Comic) ~ Reality (Comic) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
- JL - Posted October 14, 2011 Share Posted October 14, 2011 Repost from HiPor, right? Quote GT: Jl1223 X <----add me :3 (╯◕_◕)╯ BZPRPG Profiles 2013 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerothemaster Posted October 14, 2011 Author Share Posted October 14, 2011 Repost from HiPor, right? eeyup. Which was a repost from here. (Can you mention that site? Has BZP repealed that rule?) BUT NOW I CAN POST: CHAPTER 2: SOMETHING IS REVEALED Takadox: *sobbing* Oh, Mata Nui! What have I done to deserve this? I was never that bad of a person! Well, if you disregard the mass murder… and the “rebel against the robot” fad… and that little tyrant fling that I had back in ’86… If you forget that, I’ve been a really good guy most of my life! So why am I stuck here, in an abandoned studio with a bunch of total freaks? Ehlek: I think I’m insulted. Takadox: I could have had power! Money! Friends! What did I do that stuck me here? Bitil: *puts his hand on Takadox’s shoulder* I think I have some helpful advice for you, friend. Takadox: *looks up* What? Bitil: *twitches* HEY LISTEN Takadox: Say what? Bitil: HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN Takadox: I’m listening! Get on with it! Bitil: HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN Takadox: Ehlek: Avak: This is really sad. Antroz: *smacks Bitil with a macbook* Antroz: Hooray for Apple! Random People In Background: Hooray! Krika: MY COMPUTER! MY THOUSAND DOLLAR COMPUTER! Antroz: Thousand dollars? You need to learn how to spend less. Krika: It’s a great computer! AND YOU RUINED IT! Antroz: No I didn’t! It’s as good as new! See?*hands the badly smashed computer to Krika* Krika: There’s a giant, Bitil shaped dent in the screen. Antroz: But it still works. Krika: The middle of the screen doesn’t show anything. Antroz: But it still works. Krika: No, it doesn’t. Antroz: I hear it whirring. Krika: That doesn’t mean that it’s working. Bitil: I remembered what I was going to say! Takadox: What? Bitil: DO A BARREL ROLL! Takadox: Bitil: What? It’s good advice! Vhisola: Hey guys! Avak: Vhisola! Ehlek: You’re back! Vhisola: Of course! Why wouldn’t I be? Takadox: WHY DID YOU ABANDON ME? Vhisola: I didn’t! I had a class! Antroz: That took two days? Vhisola: … Well, I didn’t come right back. Krika: We’re starving! Vhisola: There’s a fridge with food. Why didn’t you get any from there? Ehlek: Yeah, Krika, why didn’t you? Krika: … You mean you knew about it? Ehlek: Yeah. You were busy playing games. Krika: My dark yellow mage is almost level 658! You can’t ignore something like that! Ehlek: Vhisola: Unfortunately, I can’t. Bitil: Hey Vhisola! Vhisola: What? Bitil: *Trollface* REMEMBAH ME? Vhisola: Krika: *looks up* That emote has been used far too much. Avak: Is there somethin’ we could actually accomplish today? Vhisola: Yes! I brought our producer to meet you! Takadox: Our what? Krika: Is it edible? Vhisola: No. He’s the guy who shows our comedy to the world! Antroz: What comedy? Vhisola: Shush. I’ll bring him in. *leaves**comes back in with Tahu* Vhisola: Guys, this is Tahu. He’s our producer. Tahu: Hello, peasants! Ehlek: Pheasants? Bitil: Are they the ones that go “quack”? Avak: No. Bitil: Darn. Tahu: It’s quite nice to meet you all. I would have come earlier if I wasn’t so insanely popular that I couldn’t fit it into my schedule. Sorry about that. Takadox: So you show our… comedy… to the world? Tahu: Yes. Your idea was the best we had! So, we went with it. Antroz: What was the idea? Tahu: That we take a bunch of characters who appeared for one year and drop them together in one studio for comedic purposes! Antroz: Oh. Tahu: We needed something electric after “The Toa Mahri become Florists” and “The Toa Mata meet Bob Smith Jr, Auto Mechanic” flopped. Ehlek: I see. Avak: But why were just we selected? Pridak: Yeah! Zaktan: What about us! The Six Rahkshi: *singing* Why, oh why, were we not selected? (not se-lec-ted!) Tahu: We had a rigorous meeting to decide which seven to use. *BEGIN FLASHBACK* Tahu: Now, Pohatu, after I blindfold you, put your hand in the bowl and grab seven names! Pohatu: Sure! Gali: This is so exciting! *END FLASHBACK* Tahu: Very rigorous. Bitil: PINGAS Ehlek: Avak: sigh… quite a team you chose. Antroz: *accidentally smacks Avak with a CD case* Antroz: Hooray for… oh, dear. Sorry, Avak. Random People In Background: Hoo… uh, what? Avak: SORRY? YOU POKED MY EYE! I’LL SHOW YOU SORRY! Avak: *Aims large gun that randomly appeared out of thin air at Antroz* Antroz: Eep! Hydraxon: *Smashes through wall behind Antroz* Haha! I have armored my face! I can stand against your challenge! Avak: *Fires* Antroz: *ducks* Hydraxon: WHAT THE H- *Hit by explosive shot* EEEEEEEEEEEHHHHOOOOAAAARRRRRGGHHH Avak: …. Oops. Bitil: Hey! I’m the meme king around here! *shakes fist at air where Hydraxon flew towards* TAKE THAT BACK, YOU RUNNING GAG STEALER! Takadox: Yes, quite an interesting team indeed. Tahu: Stunning! Marvelous! Amazing! That’s the stuff that sells! Avak: Death and destruction? Tahu: Yes! Krika: What is this world coming to? Tahu: Well, I think I’m just ruining your creative energy! So, excuse me as I leave! *leaves* Ehlek: I have a creative energy? Bitil: All my dreams have come true! Krika: What now? Avak: Vhisola: Wait for the next chapter, of course! Takadox: WHAT? Vhisola: Um… what’s wrong, Takadox? Takadox: Take me with you! I can’t stand it here anymore! Bitil: I AM THE PROBLEM OFFICER Ehlek: Avak: Bitil, you just muffed that meme up so badly. Bitil: Sorry. Vhisola: I do see what you mean. Takadox: So you’ll deliver me? Vhisola: No. You need to bond some more! Takadox: I DON’T WANT TO BOND WITH THESE PEOPLE! Bitil: *hands Takadox glue* Bonding? Takadox: I’ll bond you, you meme-spouting bonehead! Come here! *Chases Bitil* Vhisola: Good! This is good! Well, I’ll leave you to it! *leaves* Bitil: YOU’RE TOO SLOW Takadox: SHUT UP AND LET ME CATCH YOU! Quote The Drawing Room (Comic) ~ Mata Nui Adventures (Comic)Lost Forgotten Souls (Comedy) ~ Bad Images (Comic) ~ Reality (Comic) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King of the Madness Isles Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 Great job, even as I read this again. Can't wait for you to get to new chapters! -PurpleBouncy- Quote "The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. No more half measures Walter." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MT Zehvor Posted October 15, 2011 Share Posted October 15, 2011 MT approves a second time. -MT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerothemaster Posted October 18, 2011 Author Share Posted October 18, 2011 CHAPTER 3: AND HERE COMES THE BREAKDOWN Takadox: *Smashes head against wall* Avak: Umm… Excuse me, laddie, but what exactly are you doing? Takadox: *sobbing* I don’t want this anymore! I just can’t take it! *falls into Avak’s arms* Avak: Oh, it’s alright, lad. Shoosh, now, it’ll be alright. C’mon, let’s get you to bed. Takadox: *Sniffs* Okay. Avak: *helping Takadox into the bedroom* It’s gonna be alright, Taka, d’nae worry yourself. Takadox: Really? Avak: Yes, of course… *looks at Ehlek, who is currently lying on the bed* EHLEK! GET OFF THE BED! Ehlek: What? Why? Avak: BECAUSE I SAID SO Ehlek: Okay, whatever. Avak: *lays Takadox on bed* Shhh… It’ll all be okay… Just go to sleep. Takadox: *sniffles and begins to suck his thumb* Avak: *exits room and talks to Ehlek* I dunnu what’s wrong wit ‘im. He’s really taking this hard. Ehlek: Yeah, no one else is having problems. Bitil: *watching videos of ponies* I’M GONNA WATCH IT AGAIN! Antroz: *Smacks Bitil with a guitar* HOORAY FOR GUITARS! Random People in Audience: HOORAY! Krika: Yo, Avak? Could you grab my left eye? It’s by your feet. Avak: *looks down* What in the name o’ Mata Nui… Krika: It fell out when I was battling the Giant Left-Handed Dwarf of the Northern Southlands. He’s a tough fight, and I had to focus real hard. Avak: … Krika: I kinda didn’t notice. Avak: … Krika: But at least my Light Chartreuse Moon Warrior reached level 756! Avak: … Bitil: SON, I AM DISAPPOINT. Krika: Shut up. Bitil: No, really, I am. Krika: ? Bitil: My parents said DISAPPOINT when I was born. Krika: … Avak: :/ Krika: …awkwaaaard. Ehlek: I haven’t seen Vhisola for a while. Avak: Now that yoo mention it, I have nae seen her either. I wonder where she’s been. Vhisola: *enters* Hey, everybody! Ehlek: There you are! Avak: We were joost dizcussin’ ya, madam. Vhisola: Oh, really? *looks around* Say, where’s Takadox? He’s usually here to greet me by crying at my feet. Avak: *looks at Ehlek* Yes, well, you should probably see this. *Takes Vhisola to bedroom* Takadox: NO! NOT THE BEES! OH GOSH NOT THE BEES! Vhisola: *flinches* Ooo, that’s not good. Ehlek: He’s been getting worse since Chapter 2. Avak: What do you think we should do wi’ him, miss? Vhisola: Well, I would say that we need a psychologist… Ehlek: Yes…. Vhisola: But it’s not in the budget. Avak: >.> Ehlek: My I say something, miss? Vhisola: Of course. Ehlek: *ahem* SCREW THE BUDGET Vhisola: *gasp* what? Avak: YES! Bitil: *Still watching videos of ponies* I’M GONNA WATCH IT AGAIN! Antroz: *Smacks Bitil with a telephone* HOORAY FOR TELEPHONES! Random People in Audience: HOORAY! Takadox: OH MATA NUI, IT’S GOT CHICKEN LEGS Krika: *smacks table* Dang it, this stupid Cybernetic Maelstrom-wielding Elven War Hero is an impossible fight! IMPOSSIBLE! Bitil: Why so serious? :troll: Antroz: *Smacks Bitil with a computer cable* HOORAY FOR CABLES! Random People in Audience: HOORAY! Vhisola: But… but we can’t do that! It’d be… WRONG! Ehlek: Would it, Vhis? Would it really? Takadox: OH GREAT SPIRITS IT SAVED ROOM FOR THE CUPCAKE Avak: Vhis, we have to do something. Bitil: WE COULD ALL TALK IN ITALICS Antroz: Did you hear that? In some land far away, the fourth wall was destroyed and crushed a young matoran’s dreams… and his left arm. Ehlek: O.o Avak: :/ Vhisola: …Okay, let’s get him out of here. Antroz: Do we have a straightjacket? Ehlek: Or a muzzle? Krika: Or a portal gun? Everyone: *looks at Krika*:/ Krika: Whaaaat? Vhisola: Alright, open the door. Ehlek: …What door? Vhisola: …The one I come through every time I come here? Krika: And where’s that? Vhisola: *facepalm* On the WALL. Bitil: The FOURTH WALL? Antroz: *Smacks Bitil with a pair of shorts* HOORAY FOR SHORTS! Random People in Audience: HOORAY! Vhisola: Okay… Here we go. *opens door* *A BRIGHT LIGHT SHINES THROUGH THE DOOR* ???: Welcome to the outside, my friends. Takadox: Are… are you a Great Spirit? ???: Perhaps… But you can call me… Vezon. Quote The Drawing Room (Comic) ~ Mata Nui Adventures (Comic)Lost Forgotten Souls (Comedy) ~ Bad Images (Comic) ~ Reality (Comic) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King of the Madness Isles Posted November 19, 2011 Share Posted November 19, 2011 Wow. That was...hilariously odd.Everyone's going insane, and the random whacking was hilarious.The fourth wall breaking was a nice touch as well.Keep it up! Quote "The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. No more half measures Walter." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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