46 replies to this topic

[Pahrak #0579]

Here is where you can review BIONICLE: The Forgotten Bond, the first (as far as I know) story to combine Slizers, RoboRiders, Bionicle, and Hero Factory. New chapters will be added every Tuesday and Thursday.

[Nevermore]

Warden and Mayor from Megamind: He did it!

Movie quotes aside this sounds very interesting, I like the Slizers and the prospect of them being in anything is appealing to me. I have one All-Important (it's so important that it's capitalized) question: Why does the brick that was given to the GB's blue? Why not purple or orange or red or white or black?

[Iron Voltex]

The prologue seems a little on the short side; however, it sounds interesting- I'll be following.

-ibrow

[Pahrak #0579]

Light blue is the color of the energy the Brick was infused with. Not entirely sure where I picked that color up, but...want it to stay consistent.
Yeah, I'm sorry that the Prologue's so short--I just wanted to give a brief set-up and describe where and how this timeline changes from the original Bionicle story. Thursday is when the action begins!

[Nevermore]

But light blue is so cliche!!

[Pahrak #0579]

What do you call that color you post in, hmmmm?
Just kidding. Chapter 1 is up, and we begin crossing over with a battle between two different sets of heroes. I think we all know a scene like this had to happen.

[Nevermore]

Hahahahahahaha!!! HF got owned!!!
Great chapter, I like how Tahu beat Stormer.

P.S: my text color is dark blue, not glowing cyan, unless my dark side is active and then it's cliche red.

[Pahrak #0579]

Thanks, I figured it would bring in some additional fans if I showed them a scene of Bionicle superiority.
Still, this is just a warm-up battle...we have a lot more battles later, heheh...

[Iron Voltex]

I enjoyed chapter 1, however, it did feel a little out of character for Stormer and Bulk to both just rush blindly into battle without figuring out if the Toa were truly enemies.

However, it is cool that Hero Factory and Bionicle appear to be in the same universe/galaxy.

-ibrow

[Pahrak #0579]

The characters might be a little different here than in some other media. I especially took some liberty with the Slizers, so...prepare for that.

[Iron Voltex]

I've never seen any stories or anything with the Slizers, so they should be fine with me.

-ibrow

[Pahrak #0579]

Well, I'm tossing in a few original Slizers, plus the main Slizer story is long over by the time Forgotten Bond starts. (Since Slizers and RoboRiders are so old, I thought it might be fitting for their stories to be in the past, as opposed to Bionicle and Hero Factory whose stories are still going at this point.) So...a few of the Slizers are dead.

[Keizah the Kaleidoscope]

Lets see....we have people commenting about Bionicle, Hero Factory, Slizers....why have no Roborider fans stepped up yet?!?!

Anyway, loved the fight scene. I think it illustrates pretty well why the Toa Mata should have kept their golden Kanohi.

Edited by Keizah the Kaleidoscope, Jan 06 2012 - 02:13 PM.

[Pahrak #0579]

Because the RoboRiders were short-lived. D: I must breathe new life into the franchise!!
...Although that probably won't happen lol

Glad you liked the fight. The Golden Masks will continue to remain useful through the story, and I do wonder why they never brought those back into the official storyline...

[Millennium]

This looks interesting. I will be following it.

[Norik The Student]

I've been waiting for this for a month. This fight scene was bound to happen. Can't wait.

[Nevermore]

Neat chapter but I keep getting confused by the use of "Alpha Team" because when I hear that I think of the Alpha Team theme and not the HF Alpha Team and then I get nostalgic for the rest of the day.

[Pahrak #0579]

Sorry about that.
The new chapter brings in the Slizers and explains my Slizer timeline. Hopefully it won't be too controversial.

[Iron Voltex]

So confusd by Slizers
Must go research now.

-ibrow

[Pahrak #0579]

Seems I'm still bad at explaining things. D: Sorry about that...

[Keizah the Kaleidoscope]

Hooray, our first major fight scene with the Roboriders! I especially liked how their elemental powers differed from those of Toa, and the way you integrated the fusions into the story was very nice.

[Nevermore]

I'm beginning to see a trend in your stories, the villains always start out much more powerful then the heroes but eventually the tables are turned and it ends in one epic final battle.

I like how Von Neb has gotten a boost and would I be wrong if I guessed that his abilities are a form of elemental powers?

[Pahrak #0579]

There's so little material with the RoboRiders that I wanted to try to include all of it, so a lot of the combiner models will have at least small appearances. Glad you liked the fight--I was unsure when writing RoboRider fight scenes since they're fairly different from our standard bipedal combatants.
Von Nebula's new powers do include Elemental Gravity powers, although they might not be exactly Toa level.

[Keizah the Kaleidoscope]

You know, there's been something nagging at the back of my head the whole time I've been reading this: "Von" is German for "from" or "of." So Von Nebula literally means "from the Nebula," implying that he has a first name that is omitted in the toyline. For this reason, using "Von" alone is nonsensical, at least if the origin of the name is German.

Anyway, rant aside, I'm curious what is meant by "heart" in this chapter. Sounds rather ominous, especially when Makuro alludes to "harvesting" of some sort...

Edited by Keizah the Kaleidoscope, Feb 14 2012 - 11:24 AM.

[Pahrak #0579]

Hm...when you put it like that, maybe I should stop referring to him just as Von...curse myself for not knowing more about German!
"Heart", in the sense used in this story, is synonymous with "soul" or "mind"--the spark of life that makes someone who they are. (Again, I must work on my clarity...)

[Nevermore]

Hm... Theory time! I'm guessing that the Quaza used in the Hero Cores has some sort of semi-sentience of its own. Good to have the RoboRiders get more time. Von Neb seems to be more of the main villain then Makuta or Blaster but thats cool, I like Von Neb and think he should have been the main villain for longer.

On a completely unrelated note my Birthday is tomorrow!

[Pahrak #0579]

An interesting theory...
<.<
>.>
I never really decided on a "main" villain, but Von Nebula does got a lot of screen time due to his sub-plot/backstory.
Happy early birthday!

[Nevermore]

I was close, very close. Shoulda guessed that The Mysterious Entity helped Makuro out, I really should have at least suspected it. Not much action but the story is progressing nicely, we learn about the Hero Cores, Von Nebbie's origin and get to see Kopaka in all of his awesomeness. Now for my latest theories, The Mysterious Entity, I'm guessing that his name is...Legolord, eh? Also I'm guessing that Von Neb's old Hero Core reacted to the Cosmic Brick to help power his new body, I also think that that could be his undoing, maybe the RoboRiders and Toa could unseal the link and somehow find a way into Von's Hero Core and then do something to disable it.

-Kapura was here

Edited by MoC1: Technic Gladiator, Feb 21 2012 - 12:56 PM.

[Pahrak #0579]

Von Nebula doesn't have a Hero Core--it was my way of explaining why only one Hero Factory hero has ever gone rogue, since Lego never did. Of course, there could still be a way for the RoboRiders to access his systems...
The action will pick up soon, I promise. It's pretty much straight battles from Chapter 17 on to the final duel, so I hope you look forward to that.
Next chapter will show Power catch up to Von Nebula as he heads into the core of the RoboRider world. A surprising event will take place there...

Edited by SSJ Pahrak, Feb 21 2012 - 01:05 PM.

[Keizah the Kaleidoscope]

Dr. Makuro is a robot, right? If so, that makes me wonder how he came up with the names for the Heroes...

Von Nebula's turnaround made for some captivating reading. I especially like how you "choreographed" the fighting in this chapter, particularly the bits with Gali, Lewa, and Kopaka. It actually gave me a better picture of their teamwork than some of the canon fights in the books, frankly.

Edited by Keizah the Kaleidoscope, Feb 23 2012 - 12:08 PM.

[Pahrak #0579]

Yeah, Makuro's a robot. As for where he got the names...uh...I didn't think about that...
Glad you liked the fighting! I hope you enjoy the large battles still to come!

Chapter 16 will focus on the aftermath of Chapter 15, and also set things up for the first of two massive battles that lead right to the climax.

[Nevermore]

Sorry if this review is a bit hurried, I'm being dragged to the zoo, yay.

I like Von's entrance, it was close to what Stormer thought it would be but different. I can see that this is just the beginning of this battle with good guys and bad guys each having an enemy they target specifically for some reason or other. It's nice to see Vapor in this, he is one of the least used yet way cool characters like Kapura and its nice to see them get a bit of the spotlight.

[Pahrak #0579]

We'll be seeing a good amount of Vapor in the chapters to come...

[Nevermore]

This chapter is the beginning of the turning of the tide, I have a feeling that in the next chapter Blaster will beat Wairuha but then Millennium comes, having recovered from his despair, and fights Blaster in an epic duel that is won by the protagonist.

Guesses aside I like how you wrote the melee fighting, often powers will be focused on and less energy is put into writing the melee clashes.

[Pahrak #0579]

Well, that's not exactly what happens...I need to shake it up a bit!

Glad you like the melee! Powers are fun, but there's not much that's as satisfying as punching someone in the face.

[Nevermore]

Did not see that coming. I so did not see that coming. I'm just mind blown by how cool that is that Stormer is sorta "fused" to Certavus, granting him access to his amazing skills. On the other hand I have no idea how this is possible and need an explanation to understand this. So confused...

[Pahrak #0579]

Well, in the Forgotten Bond dimension, all of the worlds included in Slizers, RoboRiders, Bionicle, and Hero Factory coexist, including Bara Magna. Certavus died on Bara Magna, but the harvesting antenna at Hero Factory drew in his heart, which was then bound to a Hero Core, and that Hero Core was implanted in Stormer. At present, Stormer is releasing the locks that "supress" Certavus's heart, letting Certavus's skills and memories come to the surface--but since his systems cannot properly process something so complex as a heart, they will begin to slowly break down. Hope that helps clear things up.

Next week I'm planning to post chapters on Tuesday, Wedneday, and Thursday to speed things up just a bit, and the week after that I'll post the last two chapters! Expect to see the stakes become even higher next week!

Edited by Pahrak Cantus, Mar 29 2012 - 04:10 PM.

[Nevermore]

Sorry for not reviewing in a while, real life is annoying at times...

Anywho, epic duel time! This is going to be very interesting to see Technic Tahu and Technic Makuta fight it out with the universe as prize.

Why is the prefix "Technic" given to those who have Perfect Resonance? (it's so cool, I HAVE to capitalize it) Why not give them personalized prefixes?

[Pahrak #0579]

I went with Technic Tahu and Technic Makuta because Slizers, RoboRiders, and early Bionicles were all sub-themes of Lego's Technic line, and I figured that bringing them all together in one character called for a reference to this fact. (Of course, Hero Factory isn't really Technic, but...that's a technicality )
The duel shall indeed be epic! Chapter 29 is easily the longest chapter in the story--one of the longest chapters I've ever written for any story, in fact. I didn't want a duel determining the fate of four awesome Lego lines to be dissappointing after all!

[Nevermore]

...Ears bleeding from horrible pun.

Don't forget melee!