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[Hurricane iBrow]

CHARACTER POST

Some Pointers from Tahu
iBrow Comedy Productions

Someplace, Sometime:

Tahu: Alright men, listen up! Today I’m going to teach you all how to be heroes! And now those dorky Hero Factory heroes, I mean REAL HEROES!!

Furno: Hey, that isn’t nice. We’re cool.

Makuta: You are not. Hero Factory is dumb. Like Icarax over there.

Icarax: ...

Makuta: See? He’s so dumb, he’s speechless!

Icarax: ...

Furno: ... he’s dead.

Makuta: ... oh. My bad.

Tahu: SHUT UP! I DON’T WANT ANY MORE TALKING, YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!

Makuta: Whatever, bro. You and me, we’re tight. You ain’t gonna do nothin’ to me.

Tahu: YOU WANNA BET, PUNK?!!?!

Makuta: My ears hurt.

Furno: See, if you were a Hero Factory hero, you could put him on mute.

Tahu: ...

Furno: I think that might’ve been a bad idea. Yo Surge, get over here!

Surge: No way buddy.

Furno: I’ll let you use my jetpack.

Surge: Alright, I’m coming. Now, what did you- OH MY GOD!

The unfortunate Surge then found himself impaled by Tahu’s sword, which had been meant for Furno.

Tahu: SEE? THAT’S WHAT A REAL HERO DOES! SACRFICES HIMSELF FOR THE STUPID!!!

Surge: I don’t... wanna be a hero anymore....

Tahu: NONSENSE! EVEN MAKUTA WANTS TO BE A HERO!

Makuta: Yeah! Wait a minute, was that an insult? It was an insult, wasn’t it?

Surge: I feel sort of sick.

Tahu: NONSENSE! YOU’LL FEEL BETTER IN A MINUTE, ONCE YOUR PRIDE CATCHES UP! WHAT DOES FURNO HAVE TO SAY?

Furno: *snicker* Glad it wasn’t me. *snicker*

Tahu: YOU WILL SHOW RESPECT TO THE GUY WHO SACRIFICED HIS LIFE FOR YOU!

Surge: I’m gonna die?

Makuta: SUCKER!!!

Tahu: Ahem.

Makuta: Oh right, my bad. You’re the only one allowed to use capital letters. Sorry.

Surge: I feel cold.

Tahu: NONSENSE! YOU’LL FEEL WARMER IN A MINUTE!

Surge: Everything... going black....

Tahu: Nonsense! No dude, I’m serious, if you die, I’m giving you an “f” on this course.

Furno: Surge, you gonna be okay? Don’t die!

Surge: ...Furno...?

Furno: Yeah?

Surge: I just... wanted you to know... I always hated you the most.

Furno: ...we’ve known each other for like ten minutes.

Surge: I know.

Furno: Oh just die. And get off my desk. *Shoves*

Surge: I hate you. Bleagh.

Tahu: FURNO! TO THE OFFICE! NOW!

Furno: Fine... better than this class, at any rate.

Makuta: Zing!

Tahu: ...

Makuta: Uh, I mean, bad Furno! How rude! You’re dumb!

Breez: He is not!

Makuta: Oh be quiet, girlfriend.

Breez: I’m not your friend!

Nex: Yeah, she’s my friend!

Breez: I hate you both.

Nex: Oh... I feel depressed.

Makuta: You better. Hero Factory sucks.

Breez: Oh please don’t start that again.

Makuta: Just for you Breez, because you said please, I’ll continue. Hero Factory sucks!

Nex: That’s it.

Nex leapt at Makuta, only to be slammed to the floor by Tahu’s foot.

Nex: Ow....

Tahu: THAT SHOULD TEACH YOU A LESSON, WELP!

Makuta: Yeah! Bionicle 2, Hero Factory 0!

Tahu: MAKUTA! STAND UP!

Makuta did so, towering three times Tahu’s height.

Makuta: You asked for me?

Tahu: I ORDER YOU TO GIVE ME TEN PUSH-UPS, AND THEN I WANT YOU TO GO OVER TO THAT BURNING SKYSCRAPER AND SAVE THE INNOCENT MATORAN INSIDE!!!

Makuta: That seems to be asking quite a lot of me.

Tahu: ...

Makuta: I don’t think I’m going to go.

Tahu: ...

Makuta: Actually, I just had a brilliant idea. Imma go listen to what you told me to do. Be back in ten minutes.

Tahu: THE PUSH-UPS FIRST!

Makuta: Fine. One, two, three, four... five... six... *groan* seven... oh god... eight... hernia... nine... limbs turning to jelly... must... resist urge... to give up... think... pie... ten! Phew, that was hard. Alright, I’m off! See you all in ten!

Nex: ...

Breez: Weak as a duck.

Bulk: Aw man, I can only do six push-ups.

Tahu: BULK! I ORDER YOU TO GO TO THE BACK CORNER AND TRAIN IN YOUR ART OF PUSH-UPS!!!! I WANT YOU ABLE TO DO EIGHT HUNDRED BY THIS EVENING!

Bulk: You’re kidding, right?

Tahu: Do I look like I’m kidding?

Bulk: ... no.

Tahu: Well then.

Bulk: I’ll go start training.

Tahu: You do that son, you do that.

Breez: I find you to be an extremely cruel and outrageous teacher.

Sidorak: I actually find him to be quite interesting.

Nex: You’re a nerd.

Sidorak: I know... I hate my life.

Tahu: NOW THEN! RULE #34 OF BEING A HERO IS... BE COOL!

Sidorak: I’ll leave then.

Nex: Wicked! I am like, so cool! Not as cool as Breez though.

Breez: Giggle.

Tahu: ...

Makuta: PANT! COUGH! GASP! I’M BACK! PANT PANT! COUGH! ARGH!

Tahu: ...

Makuta: GOSH DARN IT, I’M USING ALL CAPITAL LETTERS AGAIN! GASP!

Tahu: I’m going to count to three.

Makuta: I’m gonna die at four.

Tahu: ...

Makuta: No I’m serious, I think I’m having a heart attack.

Tahu: ...

Makuta: Ah. All better. Alright then.

Makuta took his seat, kicking a cowering Sidorak out the window, much to the disapproval of Tahu, who made this disapproval known.

Tahu: A HERO IS NOT SUPPOSED TO KICK PEOPLE OUT OF A FIFTIETH FLOOR WINDOW!!!

Makuta: We’re on the 50^th floor? Crud! @@@@@@!

Nex: What kinda of a curse is that?

Makuta: It isn’t one.

Nex: Oh. Wow, only Breez could’ve fooled me better than that.

Breez: ...giggle?

Nex: Score 2 for Nex!!

Tahu: NOW! WHO KNOWS WHAT SUN TZU DID?

Breez: Uh, no. Who the heck is that guy?

Nex: I’m with Breez on this one.

Tahu: HE USED HIS MONEY TO BUY TWO OF EVERY ANIMAL ON EARTH, AND THEN HE HERDED THEM ONTO A BOAT, AND THEN HE BEAT THE socks OUT OF EVERY SINGLE ONE.

Nex: I’m sorry, but what relevance does that have for being a hero?

Tahu: That’s what you should do to the villains. Herp derp.

Breez: Animals don’t have socks.

Tahu: THEY DO NOW!

Nex: I think you’re stretching reality just a little too much.

Tahu: I DON’T CARE!

Makuta: Wicked! Only thirty seconds of class left!

Tahu: ...

Makuta: I mean... oh darn! Only thirty seconds of class left!

Nex: Hey Breez, I saw you eyeing that diamond the other day. I could buy it for you.

Breez: You’re pretty desperate, aren’t you?

Nex: ... maybe.

Breez: So... thanks?

Nex: Yeah. You’re welcome.

Tahu: ALRIGHT CLASS, TODAY’S CLASS IS OVER! I EXPECT YOU ALL BACK TOMORROW WITH FIFTY REASONS WHY KILLING SOMEONE IS BAD! CLASS DISMISSED!

Makuta: Man, I hate these homework assignments. It’s so much easier to just remove people from existence.

Tahu: HEROES NEVER TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT! THE EASY WAY OUT IS FOR WIMPS!

The End.

Thoughts?

-ibrow

Edited by iBrow Hearts Rarity, Jun 23 2012 - 03:28 PM.

[Mr. Chicken]

Wow... Tahu's rude.

But anways, I enjoyed this. Especially the part about beating socks out of animals... Uh, wait, that's not what it sounded like.

P.S. TO THE NUIMOBILE!!

Edited by The BIONICLE Hero, Jan 03 2012 - 02:45 PM.

[JL v2]

Tahu: HE USED HIS MONEY TO BUY TWO OF EVERY ANIMAL ON EARTH, AND THEN HE HERDED THEM ONTO A BOAT, AND THEN HE BEAT THE socks OUT OF EVERY SINGLE ONE.

I've seen this before. Where was it? It was this guy, talking to his puppets lined up on a fence with helmets. Said something about...'He fought everyone, and used his fight money to buy every single animal on earth, and then he beat the **** out of every single one of them.'

Where was it from, iBrow? It was like, years ago, and I forgot.

Anyways, nice chapter, although this was my reaction when I saw it -

Who is author? OMG YAY!
Wait, what tag?
OMG *****

And since when did they go to a 50th floor classroom? I mean, in most schools, lifts are only for teachers and disabled kids, so.......
Oh man, Bulk can finish his homework by leaving and arriving at school.

CONTINUE THIS, iBROW!

[Hurricane iBrow]

Wow... Tahu's rude.

But anways, I enjoyed this. Especially the part about beating socks out of animals... Uh, wait, that's not what it sounded like.

P.S. TO THE NUIMOBILE!!

Tahu isn't rude, he's just... k nevermind, he's rude.

Tahu: HE USED HIS MONEY TO BUY TWO OF EVERY ANIMAL ON EARTH, AND THEN HE HERDED THEM ONTO A BOAT, AND THEN HE BEAT THE socks OUT OF EVERY SINGLE ONE.

I've seen this before. Where was it? It was this guy, talking to his puppets lined up on a fence with helmets. Said something about...'He fought everyone, and used his fight money to buy every single animal on earth, and then he beat the **** out of every single one of them.'

Where was it from, iBrow? It was like, years ago, and I forgot.

Anyways, nice chapter, although this was my reaction when I saw it -

Who is author? OMG YAY!
Wait, what tag?
OMG *****

And since when did they go to a 50th floor classroom? I mean, in most schools, lifts are only for teachers and disabled kids, so.......
Oh man, Bulk can finish his homework by leaving and arriving at school.

CONTINUE THIS, iBROW!

It's from Meet the Soldier. An awesome quote to be sure. Socks are awesome too, so both of them together make one wicked line.
Maybe I'll continue this. It was certainly faster to write this script chapter than it was to write a chapter of Tahu vs. Tahu in prose.

-ibrow

[Nujanii: Kanohi Master]

The definition of dumb is unable to talk. Just so you know.

[Hurricane iBrow]

The definition of dumb is unable to talk. Just so you know.

Wow.
Makuta was actually right, then. Probably best not to let him know that, however.

-ibrow

[King Joe]

This was very funny. What I would like to see would be Mr. Makuro coming in somehow. I think that would be hilarious.

[Hurricane iBrow]

This was very funny. What I would like to see would be Mr. Makuro coming in somehow. I think that would be hilarious.

I'm starting to think I might be forced to continue this. Woot!

-ibrow

[fishers64]

This was very funny. What I would like to see would be Mr. Makuro coming in somehow. I think that would be hilarious.

I'm starting to think I might be forced to continue this. Woot!

-ibrow

Add my vote to the stack! This is actually funny! And it appeals to the zeitgeist of this community, who believe that Hero Factory has something to learn from Bionicle.

Suggestion: I think the reason for Tahu's rudeness is the fact that Bionicle is being canceled, or is it because he was de-Nuvafied, or forced to teach a class of less than inteligent persona? Or is it all of the above? I would like to see that explored a bit more.

And I second the Mr. Makuhero suggestion. Maybe Zib could make an appearance? I don't know, but this is really funny and I would like to see more of it!

[Hurricane iBrow]

This was very funny. What I would like to see would be Mr. Makuro coming in somehow. I think that would be hilarious.

I'm starting to think I might be forced to continue this. Woot!

-ibrow

Add my vote to the stack! This is actually funny! And it appeals to the zeitgeist of this community, who believe that Hero Factory has something to learn from Bionicle.

Suggestion: I think the reason for Tahu's rudeness is the fact that Bionicle is being canceled, or is it because he was de-Nuvafied, or forced to teach a class of less than inteligent persona? Or is it all of the above? I would like to see that explored a bit more.

And I second the Mr. Makuhero suggestion. Maybe Zib could make an appearance? I don't know, but this is really funny and I would like to see more of it!

Alright; consider Chapter 2 officially in the works.
Mr. Makuro and Zib will appear sometime, then. Tahu's rudeness will also be explored.

-ibrow

[ManiacToaLaco]

It's a well known fact that the only good instructor of any sort is rude, mean and vicious.

It helps if he knows what he's talking about, but that's only secondary...

I'm curious to see what you can do with this. I believe in you iBrony!

MTL

[Hurricane iBrow]

It's a well known fact that the only good instructor of any sort is rude, mean and vicious.

It helps if he knows what he's talking about, but that's only secondary...

I'm curious to see what you can do with this. I believe in you iBrony!

MTL

And so here comes Chapter 2! Some jokes return in this one, in the typical non-funny fashion (sorry Furno). Chapter 3 will go into Tahu's RAGE.

How to Be a Hero
Some Pointers from Tahu
Chapter 2
iBrow Comedy Productions


Tahu’s Classroom, Tuesday:



Tahu: HURRY UP CLASS!!


Furno: Aw, shush. Class hasn’t started yet.

Tahu: REMEMBER YESTERDAY, FURNO? DO YOU WANT A REPEAT OF YESTERDAY?

Furno: ... no.

Tahu: Precisely. NOW GET TO CLASS!!

Furno: This is gonna be a long day. Yo, Stringer!

Stringer: Wazzup Furno?

Furno: Did you uh... *whispering* did you do the homework.

Stringer: Duuuuude.... I totally got all the hoooomework done, man....

Furno: Ah. Could I-

Stringer: No.

Furno: Dang it.

The bell rang as the last few “students” walked into the room. Amongst them were a bored looking Breez, a way-too-eager Nex, Stormer, and Makuta.

Makuta: I’m so glad Sidorak was okay. He could’ve died! That’d be bad on my resumé.

Stormer: Weren’t you like, the main villain of the Bionicle line?

Makuta: That was just a job! I swear!

Stormer: Didn’t you like, wipe out entire populations or something?

Makuta: No! Of course not! I wanted to rule them! I just... had to... make an example... a couple... times.

Tahu: GET TO YOUR SEATS! I WANNA START THE LESSON!

Makuta: Eep, fine. You won’t do anything to me anyway though, right? ‘Cause you and me, we’re tight.

Tahu: ...

Stringer: Brooooo, you are like, tooootally out of it, man....

Makuta: Shut up!

Makuta then kicked Stringer out the window. Luckily for Stringer, Makuta realized which floor they were on in time to yank him back in. Not that Stringer seemed to mind.

Stringer: Duuuude, that was like, awesome....

Tahu: LISTEN UP!

The class fell silent- even Nex, who was halfway through his seventh attempt that morning to get Breez to go out with him.

Tahu: Who did the homework I assigned last night?

Breez gave a so-so gesture, and Bulk’s hand shot into the ceiling, causing screams from the class above.

Tahu: Breez?

Breez: I got one: Because if you don’t kill them, they might like you instead!

Tahu: ...

Breez: Oh boy... here we go....

Tahu: THAT WAS HORRIBLE! BULK?!

Bulk: Well sir, I-

Tahu: DON’T CALL ME SIR! DO I LOOK LIKE A SIR?!

Bulk: Uh, no. I mean, yes! Sir! No! No sir, you don’t! Sir!

Tahu: ... just continue.

Bulk: Do I have to say my entire list? I knew nobody else would do it, so I kinda did 50 for everybody.

Furno: Dude, are you serious?

Bulk: Yeah. Why?

Furno: I thought you had to train yourself to do 800 push-ups or something.

Bulk: ...I did.

Nex: And you still managed to think up 1500 reasons why killing someone is bad?!

Bulk: ...yes?

Furno: That seems physically impossible.

Bulk: Hey, it’s not my fault Turaga Nokama owns the apartment I live in!

Makuta: Nokama owns an apartment building? Wow. Why is it only me and losers like Sidorak have to go to school?

Tahu: EVERYONE SHUT UP!

Makuta: Maybe I could become an assassin...

Tahu: Don’t make me go burnmad on you.

Furno: Haha, that’s funny. Do it!

Stringer: Yeah, man... you should tooootally do it. Like, that burnmad face is like, wicked maaaaan....

Furno: ... nevermind.

Stringer: Was it like, somethin’ I said maaaaan?

Furno: Please... just stop talking. Like, forever.

Tahu: ALRIGHT! GET READY FOR THE LESSON!

Makuta: Argh.

Tahu: ...

Makuta: Uh, I mean, awesome! Wicked, a lesson! Woot!

Furno: You are so lame.

Makuta: Am not!

Furno: You are so!

Tahu: I THOUGHT I SAID SHUT UP!

The class fell silent.

Tahu: THAT’S BETTER! NOW, TODAY’S LESSON IS: WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF CORNERED BY FOUR SENTRY GUNS?

Nex: That seems a little unbelievable. How would you get trapped by four guns that can’t move, that need to be built by four engineers? How would you get stuck in that situation? Seriously!

Breez: I’m gonna... have to... agree with Nex on... this... one....

Nex: Score 3 for Nex!

Breez: Ugh....

Tahu: ...

Makuta: I know! You go up, zap all the sentry guns with your lightning powers, and then kill the engineers through an assortment of your remaining 41 powers!

Tahu: YOU DO NOT! WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT KILLING PEOPLE?!

Makuta: Oh, right. My bad.

Furno: This class sucks.

Tahu: *Breathing heavily*...

Stringer: You guys like, toooootally just like, blew a fuse or somethin’... lawl....

Furno: I’m not kidding Stringer. Don’t ever speak when I’m around again.

Stringer: Saaaaadface, man....

Furno: Stringer!

Stringer: Sorry....

Furno: ...

Stringer: ...

Furno: Better.

Tahu:

Makuta: OH MY GOD RUN!

A few seconds later the other “students” picked themselves off of the ground; Makuta was nowhere to be seen.

Furno: Totally lame.

Stringer: I like, toootally agree man. Oops.

Furno: Augh... my ears are bleeding....

Nex: Don’t worry Furno! Here’s a band-aid!

Tahu: THAT’S A POINT FOR NEX! SOMEBODY IS CLOSE TO TRUE HERO STATUS!

Breez: Woohoo! Oh wait, crud.

Nex: Score 4 for Nex! Oh yeah!

Tahu: NOW, WHO ELSE IS GONNA BE A HERO?

Furno: Not me.

Tahu: ...

Furno: I’m actually considering going into the art of spy-hood.

???: No. You do not want to go into that particular job.

Furno: Who are you? Why can’t I see you?

???: *Steps out of shadows* Do you know me now?

Furno: No.

???: That is because I am a spy, come to kill you. Now go pay attention to your teacher.

Furno: No way! You said you were gonna kill me!

???: Did I? Oh dear. See what I mean, foolish thing? Being a spy is hard work! Anyway, adios amigos!

Bulk: Are you Spanish?

???: No! What a stupid question! Now, goodbye!

Furno: Bye....

Stringer: Like, toootally goodbye, man.

Furno: Stringer, I hate you.

Tahu: LISTEN UP! I’LL MAKE HEROES OUT OF YOU YET!

Furno: I doubt it.

Tahu: TO THE OFFICE! DOUBLE TIME!

Furno: Well, at least it’s better than this class....

Sadly, nothing happened. Which only made Furno feel worthless.

Furno: Guess that joke’s old now. Alright then, see you all.

Bulk: Just leave, you horrible comedian.

Furno: Oh boo hoo, nerd face.

Nex: That was funny.

Breez: I agree- sigh....

Nex: Score 5 for Nex! At 100, Breez’ll go out with me!

Breez: I’m scared for when that day comes.

Tahu: NOW THEN! LISTEN UP! THE BELL IS ABOUT TO RING-

Silence.

Tahu: Okay good, I thought Makuta was gonna pop that ugly head in here. THE BELL IS ABOUT TO RING, AND THAT MEANS CLASS IS OVER!

Makuta: Boo yeah! No more class for the rest of the day!

Tahu: ...

Makuta: Don’t worry, I’m leaving again. Just thought you might like my two cents.

Tahu: ANYWAY! HOMEWORK IS TO BUY ME SOMETHING WITH PEANUT BUTTER! THE BIGGER AND MORE EXPENSIVE THE BETTER- AND THE WINNER WILL GET FIVE HERO POINTS!

Nex: Wicked! What happens with those?

Tahu: The first one to 100 becomes a hero and leaves this class.

Nex: Awesome....

Tahu: THAT WAS A TRICK STATEMENT! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SAY IT SUCKED, BECAUSE YOU’D BE LEAVING THIS CLASS! NEGATIVE FIVE POINTS FOR NEX!

Nex: Argh.

Breez: Giggle!

Nex: Oh well, at least I have five points towards getting Breez to go out with me.

Breez: Sigh... mood killer....

Tahu: NOW GET OUT OF HERE!

To Be Continued.


This is where you guys come in- which character do you think should complete the homework? This chapter's options are:

• Stringer
• Breez
• Nex
• Bulk
• Stormer

Hope you enjoyed it.

-ibrow

[King Joe]

Bulk. Definitively Bulk. That would be hilarious.

AAAAAAanyway, the chapter was good. I could actually hear Furno from the HF movies in my head when I read his lines.

[Nujanii: Kanohi Master]

Bulk.

And does Breez like Nex or not? I can't figure that out...

[Hurricane iBrow]

Bulk. Definitively Bulk. That would be hilarious.

AAAAAAanyway, the chapter was good. I could actually hear Furno from the HF movies in my head when I read his lines.

Bulk vote noted.
Also, can you? It's been awhile since I've seen any of the HF movies, so that's pretty cool.

Bulk.

And does Breez like Nex or not? I can't figure that out...

Breez finds Nex distasteful.
Also, Bulk vote noted.

Also, what do you guys think of the banner for this that I made? I made a topic in General Art, so you can leave any thoughts on it there if you like. However, putting them here would be okay too.

-ibrow

Edited by iBrony, Jan 05 2012 - 05:35 PM.

[fishers64]

I'm actually going to be a nonconformist and vote for Breez, although I likely will get drowned out by the number of Bulk votes.

Why? Because it would be nice, since Breez is a girl, for her to make some culinary concoction (using the peanut butter) and Nex to try to get ahold of it before it gets to the Master.

[Hurricane iBrow]

I'm actually going to be a nonconformist and vote for Breez, although I likely will get drowned out by the number of Bulk votes.

Why? Because it would be nice, since Breez is a girl, for her to make some culinary concoction (using the peanut butter) and Nex to try to get ahold of it before it gets to the Master.

More like Nex would use the opportunity to try and slip his way into getting a nice comment from her. However, nonconformity is always good. Bulk votes will probably beat you at this rate though, yes.

I'm hoping to have the next chapter up either Sunday or Monday.

-ibrow

[ManiacToaLaco]

My vote is for Bulk. Or the mysterious assassin guy. He seemed like a swell fellow.

MTL

[Hurricane iBrow]

My vote is for Bulk. Or the mysterious assassin guy. He seemed like a swell fellow.

MTL

Mysterious assassin cannot be voted for, so Bulk will be counted.

-ibrow

[Hurricane iBrow]

How to Be a Hero
Starring Tahu, Makuta, William Furno
Chapter 3
iBrow Comedy Productions

Wednesday:

Tahu checked over the class list as his students shambled into class alphabetically, checking their names off as he went along.

• ALMIGHTY – Present
• Carapar – Present for half day
• Daniel Rocka – Arriving next week
• Dunkan Bulk – Present every single day. Don’t even bother checking.
• Gorast – Suspended for suspected relation to Icarax’s death
• Icarax – Dead
• Jimi Stringer – Who knows. Probably out drinking Eggnog.
• Julius Nex – Present
• Kohrak-Kal – Suspended for repeated volume
• Kopaka - Present
• Krika – Absent; note about appointment regarding depression
• Makuta – Present, sadly.
• Mark Surge – Dead
• Mazeka – Present
• Meltdown – Present
• Merrick Fortis – Absent
• Natalie Breez – Present
• Nathan Evo – Absent; note about weightlifting competition
• Nidhiki – Absent
• Preston Stormer – Absent; note about hardcore in the moment hero training
• Rotor - Present
• Sidorak – Absent; not about hospital stay for broken everything
• Takadox – Suspended for hypnotizing other students
• Thok – Suspended for repeated dizziness
• Turaga Dume – Present
• Vezok – Present
• Vezon – Present
• Vultraz – Absent; note about hospital stay for broken everything
• William Furno – Present
• Zaktan – Present

Tahu: Where is Merrick Fortis? Nidhiki?

Furno: Probably skipping. That’s what I would do if I wasn’t a role model for children.

Vezok: If you were a role model for children Furno, I would eat my pants. Because you’re definitely not a role model for children.

Furno: Don’t you eat pants already?

Vezok: No, that’s Vezon.

Vezon: I wish I didn’t have to be the crazy insane guy all the time, but pants are delicious. Better than socks, I’ll bet.

Tahu: ...

Furno: My bad- I can never tell you two apart.

Vezon: How can you NOT tell us apart?!

Furno: You both look the same!

Vezok: I’m blue! Vezon’s black! I have a spine! He doesn’t!

Vezon: Yeah, I’m spineless. Don’t count on me to save you from a burning building.

Vezok: He has a staff and a pet dragon. I have neither. He eats pants- I don’t.

Furno: Useful tidbits would be more useful had I known them before.

Tahu: SHUT UP! NOW, WHO DID THE HOMEWORK LAST NIGHT?

Bulk: *Pulls out jar of peanut butter sandwiches four times his size* There.

Tahu: ... I love you.

Nex: Hold your horses! Look out the window!

Everyone did so, to see a tower of peanut butter and crackers as big as the school where that burning building from chapter 1 had once stood.

Tahu: I take that back. Nex, I love you.

Nex: I love me too. Not as much as Breez though. Not nearly as much.

Breez: I’d say that’s creepy, but I think I should show you guys how much I got.

The lime green hero pointed out the other window, where a telescope stood. Tahu walked over and looked through before gasping, running over, and giving Breez a hug.

Tahu: Never mind! I love you Breez! A city of peanut butter products! Woot!

Breez: Uh... I feel awkward now....

Nex: *Looks through telescope*

Breez: ...

Nex: Breez, you’re the most amazing person I’ve ever or ever will know.

Breez: Thanks, Nex! That’s wonderful!

Nex: Aw yeah! Score 7 for Nex!

Breez: Mood killer again.

Bulk: Ahem.

The class glanced over to Bulk, who fired a Portal Gun sitting on the wall and gestured towards it.

Bulk: Shall we? Because this jar is simply the sample.

Tahu: ...

The class stepped through, to find themselves on another planet. A planet that happened to be made out of every peanut butter product known to mankind... and all not known.

Tahu: Bulk wins! Five points! And another five for sheer size!

Bulk: Do you love me?

Tahu: Of course not! You took too long!

Bulk: Oh well. At least I’m ten points ahead of everyone. Fifteen ahead of Nex.

Nex: Someday those points will return to me! Even if I have to kill to do it!

Tahu: ANOTHER MINUS FIVE POINTS FOR YOU, NEX! STUPID!

Nex: Argh....

The class then returned to the classroom.

Furno: If I ever hear the words “peanut butter” together again, I’m gonna throw up and die.

Makuta: Peanut butter!!

Furno: ...

Tahu: MAKUTA... WHAT DID WE LEARN LAST WEEK ABOUT TRYING TO START A CONFLICT?!

Makuta: That it’s not nice. Sigh.

Tahu: PRECISELY! SO SMARTEN UP, SMARTY!

Makuta: I suppose I could make an attempt to show some brains during this operation.

Tahu: YOU BETTER! I’M GETTING TIRED OF STUPID PEOPLE IN MY CLASS!

Stringer: Duuuude, do I have to like, leeeeave of sommmmething...?

Furno: Stringer, go die in a hole. I’m serious now- if you speak while I’m in the same room once more, I’m just going to explode.

Stringer: ...

Furno: While killing you.

Stringer: ...

Tahu: FURNO! TO THE OFFICE! FOR THE LAST TIME- WE DO NOT KILL PEOPLE!!!!!!!

Furno: The office again? Geez... well, it’s better than-

Bulk: Don’t try that again. If you ever try to become a professional comedian, you will fail miserably and begin living off of chocolate bars.

Tahu: SEE? THAT’S HOW YOU THREATEN A PERSON! BY NOT THREATENING THEM!

Furno: You’re playing favourites. I’m the one who’s a role model for children!

Vezok: You are not! I’ll bet Stormer is though.

Furno: Look at that blimp out the window and tell me what’s plastered onto the side.

Vezok: ... “William... Furno... a supporter of... children everywhere... and a fighter... of crime and evil.”

Furno: See?

Vezok: Crime and evil?

Furno: ...

Tahu: CRIME IS EVIL, STUPID! YOUR BLIMP SUCKS! GO THE OFFICE!

Nex: How come I lose Hero Points and he doesn’t?

Tahu: SHUT UP, NEX! MINUS FIVE MORE HERO POINTS!

Nex: You’ve gotta be kidding me....

Breez: It’s okay Nex, I feel for you.

Nex: Sore 8 for Nex!!

Breez: ...

Tahu: FURNO! OFFICE! NOW!

Furno: I’m going, I’m going. Hey, does anyone want some chicken wings while I’m by the cafeteria?

Stringer: Duuuude, toootally-

Furno: Except for Stringer, Bulk, or Makuta.

Makuta: That seems discriminatory to me. Hero Factory sucks.

Furno: No Makuta, you suck. There’s a difference.

Nex: Zing!

Makuta: *punches Nex in the face* Take that- I’ve wiped out entire legions of Toa with that... punch....

Nex: *stands up and punches Makuta back* You want a brawl, you’ve got one, bro.

Breez: Wow! How did you stand up to that punch? You must be really strong.

Nex: Score 9 for Nex, baby!

Tahu: ENOUGH! NO MORE FIGHTING! I’D LIKE TO ACTUALLY GET SOMETHING DONE IN THIS CLASS!

Unfortunately, Tahu’s words were lost to Makuta and Nex, who were busy tussling on the floor.

Tahu: It’s alright Tahu... just count to ten... no, count down from ten... come on... ten... nine....

Bulk: I’ve had enough. You guys are dumb.

Breez: I agree. I’ll get Nex, you get Makuta.

Bulk: Oh, thanks! I get big, powerful, and ugly.

Breez: It was Nex who withstood a punch that could knock down a building.

Bulk: Never mind, you can have Nex. Heave!

Makuta: Get off! Get off!

Bulk: I have free donuts.

Makuta: You can’t bribe me!

Bulk: I also have five dollars.

Makuta: Not a chance.

Bulk: I also have a pen with orange ink.

Makuta: ... alright fine. Gimme.

Breez: Nex, come on, get off.

Nex: Why should I?

Breez: Because... uh... because... you might get hurt?

Nex: So?

Breez: I don’t want you to get hurt?

Nex: Are you possibly suggesting that you care about me? =D

Breez: ... sure.

Nex: Alright, I’ll get off! Score 10 for Nex! I’ll take you out to the king’s palace for dinner tonight!

Breez: It’s gonna be a looooong night.

Tahu: Good job Breez! And Bulk, I guess.

Bulk: The lack of enthusiasm for me is disappointing.

Tahu: Breez gets five hero points, and Bulk gets... five as well, I guess.

Bulk: Seriously, the lack of enthusiasm is causing me to worry. Also, fifteen hero points. Woot!

Tahu: Now, the class has been taken all up unfortunately-

Makuta: Or fortunately, depending on your viewpoint. My viewpoint is “fortunately”, because I’ve really been waiting to take over the building they’re demolishing for awhile.

Tahu: ...

Makuta: Uh, I mean, my viewpoint is “unfortunately”! I haven’t been waiting to take over any buildings! At all!

Nex: You are so bad at buttering him up.

Tahu: THAT’S BECAUSE YOU CAN’T BUTTER ME UP!

Nex: Good point.

Bulk: Homework?

Tahu: Hmm? Yeah, sure, whatever....

Bulk: Yeah, I’m starting to feel concerned.

Tahu: Sure Bulk, whatever. By the way, I might send you a chainsaw.

Bulk: Definitely concerned for my own safety now.

Tahu: ANYWAY, THE HOMEWORK TONIGHT IS: PLANT A TREE AND MAKE IT GROW WITH BONEMEAL! THE ONE WITH THE BIGGEST TREE WILL RECEIVE FIVE HERO POINTS! NOW GET OUT OF HERE!

To Be Continued.

Alright, so for this chapter's homework, you can pick from:

• Bulk
• Breez
• Nex
• Makuta
• Vezok

Also, you can pick from the class list who you'd like to see make an appearance in future chapters.

-ibrow

[King Joe]

Fortis should be in.

And have Breez do the work, while nex stands in awe.

[fishers64]

Vezok should do the homework.

And I want to see Turaga Dume's epic dissaproval of all the craziness in here.

[Nujanii: Kanohi Master]

Bulk. Enough said.


Poor Breez.

[Hurricane iBrow]

So one vote Bulk, one vote Breez, one vote Vezok.
One more person vote for one of these three for tie breaker!

-ibrow

[Meta Nuva]

I can barely breathe...this is killing me.

Tahu: HEY! AND ESPECIALLY NO DYING OF LAUGHTER!!!

I'd have a long way to go in this class . Just one question: which Tahu is this?

Vote: Bulk for sure. No questions asked.

~TTG~

P.S. Man is the TvT topic dry as a desert. When's Chapter 11 coming up?

[Hurricane iBrow]

I can barely breathe...this is killing me.

Tahu: HEY! AND ESPECIALLY NO DYING OF LAUGHTER!!!

I'd have a long way to go in this class . Just one question: which Tahu is this?

Vote: Bulk for sure. No questions asked.

~TTG~

P.S. Man is the TvT topic dry as a desert. When's Chapter 11 coming up?

Uh, this is just Tahu. This comedy isn't related to Tahu vs. Tahu in any way; it's another original creation by yours truly.

As for chapter 11, go to the TvT topic and ask and it shall be answered.

-ibrow

[The Writer]

Tahu: NOW! WHO KNOWS WHAT SUN TZU DID?

Breez: Uh, no. Who the heck is that guy?

Nex: I’m with Breez on this one.

Tahu: HE USED HIS MONEY TO BUY TWO OF EVERY ANIMAL ON EARTH, AND THEN HE HERDED THEM ONTO A BOAT, AND THEN HE BEAT THE socks OUT OF EVERY SINGLE ONE.

Poor Sun Tzu. He actually took revenge on someone who had his kneecaps removed as a general. And I pity Noah too, for being culpritised.

[Hurricane iBrow]

Psh, I'm sure Noah doesn't care.

-ibrow

[Norik The Blood Elf]

Tahu: NOW! WHO KNOWS WHAT SUN TZU DID?

Breez: Uh, no. Who the heck is that guy?

Nex: I’m with Breez on this one.

Tahu: HE USED HIS MONEY TO BUY TWO OF EVERY ANIMAL ON EARTH, AND THEN HE HERDED THEM ONTO A BOAT, AND THEN HE BEAT THE socks OUT OF EVERY SINGLE ONE.

Poor Sun Tzu. He actually took revenge on someone who had his kneecaps removed as a general. And I pity Noah too, for being culpritised.

Whose kneecaps? I think it was a diciple of his, not Sun Tzu, who had his kneecaps removed.

[Hurricane iBrow]

How to Be a Hero
Not Responsible For Awesomeness Overloads
Chapter 4 – The First Chapter with a Name
iBrow Comedy Productions

Thursday:

Furno: I’m telling you, I’m definitely not getting kicked out today.

Makuta: Suuuure. Like you could do that.

Vezok: Yeah, you cheater.

Furno: I’m not a cheater, and I so too can do it!

Vezok: You paid a blimp to say you’re a role model for children.

Tahu: Alright class, listen up.

Furno: I didn’t pay the blimp! The blimp just did it! And I... didn’t stop them.

Vezok: You’re dumb.

Makuta: Hero Factory sucks!

Tahu: AHEM.

Furno: Hero Factory does not suck! We replaced you!

Makuta: Took you ten years to do it too, and you were still virtually Bionicle sets until 2.0.

Furno: I DON’T CARE! We’re better than you! You suck!

Tahu: DON’T EVER SPEAK IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS AGAIN. TO THE OFFICE, NOW.

Furno: ...

Makuta: *Snigger*

Furno: Shut up.

Tahu: NOW.

Furno: Sigh.... Alright, I’m going.

Nex: I’m not kidding- why does he never lose Hero Points?

Tahu: NEX! INTERRUPTING IS SOMETHING VILLAINS DO! MINUS FIVE-

Makuta: Lawl! Nex is losing more- crud.

Tahu: MINUS FIVE HERO POINTS FOR NEX AND MAKUTA!

Makuta: Darn. I like, totally cared about those things. Tooootally.

Stringer: Duuuude, you’re like, toooootally talking like meeee now duuuude.

Furno: *Pops head in* Could we kill him? Please?

Tahu: GET OUT!!

Furno: Eek!

Tahu: ANYWAYS! WHO COMPLETED THE HOMEWORD LAST NIGHT?!

Vezok: Oh! Me! Look!

Vezok pulled a rather crumpled sapling out of his pocket, which Vezon then leaned over and decided to snack on.

Vezok: ...sad face....

Vezon: Don’t worry brother, that thing definitely wasn’t winning you any Hero Points. I saw Breez’s.

Vezok: Argh.

Breez: He’s correct. My tree, as you can see out the window, stands 25 feet tall.

Makuta: We use things called “bios” here lady.

Nex: Don’t call her a lady!

Makuta: Why not?

Nex: Uh... you know what, never mind.

Tahu: MAKUTA IS CORRECT! NO HERO POINTS THOUGH, BECAUSE HE USED IT AS A THINLY VEILED INSULT!

Makuta: Why does he always pick up on that?

Tahu: BREEZ WINS!

Bulk: Ahem.

Makuta: You’re kidding me. You did the best homework again.

Nex: If Furno was here he’d be getting so mad.

Bulk: If you will follow me into my portal once more, you will see my homework.

Makuta: I think we should ban alternate universes. He clearly has too much time on his hands.

Vezok: Why do you care? It’s not like you do the homework.

Makuta: I wasn’t here to get the assignment, how could I?

Tahu: EVERYTHING IS ON THE INTERNET NOW, STUPID! NOW GET INTO THE POTRAL! *Kick*

Makuta: I could say “ouch”, but I’m above that, unless you count what I just said. Then I’m not.

Bulk: Ta-da!

Tahu: HOLY.

Vezok: Wow, I’m never even going to attempt homework again.

Breez: This is making me lose a lot of confidence.

Nex: Don’t worry Breez, we all still love and support you!

Breez: Thanks, Nex. That means a lot.

Nex: Serious?

Breez: Of course!

Nex: Score 11 for Nex! Alright!

Breez: And depressed again.

Nex: Here, have some hot chocolate.

Breez: Thanks... oh my gosh.

Nex: What? Is it too hot?

Breez: No! This is the best hot chocolate I’ve ever had!

Nex: I put cinnamon in it!

Breez: You made this? You made the greatest hot chocolate ever?

Nex: You bet I did! Score 12 for Nex!

Breez: I’d be depressed again right now, but this hot chocolate is just too good to feel sad.

Bulk: Stop taking away the spotlight!

Tahu: This tree is friggin’ huge.

For information that I’m sure you’re all dying to know, Bulk’s tree was currently the size of a mountain and growing before their eyes.

Bulk: You would not believe how much redstone went into the circuit pumping the bonemeal into that tree.

Makuta: Like I said before. He clearly has far too much time.

Breez: So... delicious!

Makuta: ...

Nex: She means the hot chocolate dude. Relax.

Makuta: Phew.

Tahu: ALRIGHT! BACK TO CLASS! FIVE SECONDS!

Makuta: Five seconds for the entire class to get back through the portal, into the classroom, and sitting down and then calming down enough to learn?! That’s how long it took me to... *looks around* guys? Wait a minute, where did the portal go?

Back in the Classroom:

Tahu: NEX! STOP STARING AT BREEZ!

Nex: *Shakes his head* Urgh... awesome overload....

Breez: ...

Tahu: VEZON! YOU BITE THAT DESK ONCE MORE, I EAT YOU!

Vezon: Tasty! Wait, never mind. I thought you meant I’d eat you for a second.

Vezok: ... I am so disappointed.

Tahu: MAKUTA! STOP BEING INVISIBLE!

Vezok: ...

Merrick Fortis (henceforth known as Fortis): I don’t think he’s here.

Tahu: ... I SAID MAKUTA, TURN OFF YOUR INVISIBILITY! NOW! OR I KICK YOUR BUTT!

Fortis: ... did you not listen?

Tahu: ... you know what, you’re right. He didn’t come.

Nex: Woot! Makuta’s gone!

Tahu: MINUS FIVE MORE HERO POINTS! And also five more Hero Points to Bulk, I guess. Stupid Bulk.

Bulk: The direction our relationship is taking bothers me Tahu. I think we should go to marriage counselling.

Nex: You and Tahu are married?

Bulk: Of course not! I just don’t think there’s any sort of other counselling that might come close to fitting the bill.

Fortis: In my extremely deep and manly voice, I shall say that perhaps you should just get regular counselling.

Bulk: Nah, that’s for when you have trouble beating people up.

Tahu: SHUT UP! *Beats Bulk with his sword*

Bulk: OW! You know what Fortis? You’re right.

Fortis: I am always right my friend. Sometimes it takes awhile to find out, that’s all. (Are you imagining his deep, manly voice?)

Breez: Your voice... it’s so... it’s so....

Nex: I think I’m losing ground here.

Breez: So manly. So... perfect.

Fortis: My dear Breez, I would not wish to break your friend Nex’s heart.

Nex: Is this the part where I’m supposed to get like, super jealous?

Breez: But...!

Fortis: Hush Breez. Give it time, and your affections for me will die down. Deep down inside, you know you’re in love with Nex.

Nex: Yeah! Hold on, I’m getting really confused here. Seriously, is this where I’m supposed to be going to drastic measures to remove Fortis from the equation?

Breez: But I love you, Fortis!

Fortis: Breez, give it time. If you still love me so in one month, then we will forget about Nex. (Remember his deep, manly voice!)

Nex: Oh dear.

Breez: I think I could live off of just your voice.

Fortis: Dearest Breez, do just one thing for me: do not try to live off of just my voice.

Breez: Anything for you, Fortis:

Nex: Ugh.

Tahu: STOP HAVING A COMPLICATED LOVE TRIANGLE IN MY HOW TO BE A HERO CLASS! IF YOU HAVEN’T NOTICED, NEITHER BIONICLE OR HERO FACTORY HAS HEROES FALLING IN LOVE!

Vezon: That’s because LEGO sucks!

Vezok: ... I don’t know him.

Tahu: IT DOES NOT SUCK! THEY ARE JUST A LITTLE AGAINST THE NOTION OF US FALLING IN LOVE! WHICH IS A GOOD THING! LOVE IS SELFISH, AND BEING A HERO IS NOT SELFISH AT ALL!

Vezok: Isn’t true love where you like, will do anything for another person?

Tahu: OF COURSE IT IS!

Vezok: I now fail to see how it’s selfish.

Tahu: IT JUST IS!

Vezok: Fine.

Nex: So, Breez....

Breez: Go away Nex. I’m hanging out with Fortis tonight.

Nex: Sniff... I’m... so... so... so... depressed....

Fortis: I am busy tonight. And also every single night. I do not have one single spare moment that I can spare for you, Breez.

Breez: That’s alright!

Nex: This disgusts me.

Tahu: I SAID STOP HAVING A LOVE TRIANGLE! MINUS FIFTEEN HERO POINTS FOR NEX BECAUSE ALL THREE OF YOU FAILED TO LISTEN!

Nex: Oh, come on!

Vezok: I’m not sure it’s a love triangle. Nex loves Breez and Breez loves Fortis, but Fortis clearly doesn’t love Breez.

Tahu: SILENCE! ANOTHER MINUS FIVE HERO POINTS NEX, BECAUSE YOU COMPLAINED:

Nex: I think Furno was right. Being an assassin does sound good.

Tahu: ...

Vezok: Shield yourselves! The burnmad is coming!

Tahu:

Nex: AUGH, MY FACE!

Breez: Ew! Your face is red!

Nex: AUGH! I’M SPEAKING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS! AUGH! PAIN! I’M ON FIRE!

Vezon: You are not. Lies!

Nex: PAINFUL!

Tahu: SHUT UP!

Nex: nsdkjfhbgskdjfhgskldjf!

Vezok: ...

Fortis: ...

Breez: ...

Bulk: ...

Vezon: I believe we just heard Nex’s version of a curse when he is in the most extreme pain possible.

Bulk: ... I’d hate to know what Sidorak said then.

Tahu: ENOUGH! HOMEWORK!

Bulk: Going for three in a row!

Tahu: THE HOMEWORK TONIGHT IS TO NAME IBROW’S FIRST BZPOWER NAME!

Vezok: Who’s iBrow?

Vezon: What’s BZPower?

Nex: His first name?

Fortis: Certainly a challenge... I like challenges. (Remember: deep, manly voice).

Breez: Sigh... you’re so wonderful Fortis...

Nex: Ugh.

To Be Continued.

Options for Homework:

• Bulk
• Fortis
• Vezok
• Nex
• Vezon

Also, I'd like you guys to pick signature-worthy quotes from Chapters 2, 3, and 4.

-ibrow

[fishers64]

Well, I decided to give this a try:

Bulk: Hey, it’s not my fault Turaga Nokama owns the apartment I live in!

Makuta: Nokama owns an apartment building? Wow. Why is it only me and losers like Sidorak have to go to school?

* * *

Bulk: Are you Spanish?

???: No! What a stupid question! Now, goodbye!

* * *

Vezok: He has a staff and a pet dragon. I have neither. He eats pants- I don’t.

* * *

Furno: The office again? Geez... well, it’s better than-

Bulk: Don’t try that again. If you ever try to become a professional comedian, you will fail miserably and begin living off of chocolate bars.

* * *

Tahu: Sure Bulk, whatever. By the way, I might send you a chainsaw.

Bulk: Definitely concerned for my own safety now.

* * *
Furno: Hero Factory does not suck! We replaced you!

Makuta: Took you ten years to do it too, and you were still virtually Bionicle sets until 2.0.
* * *
Makuta: I think we should ban alternate universes. He clearly has too much time on his hands.

* * *
Fortis: In my extremely deep and manly voice, I shall say that perhaps you should just get regular counselling.

Bulk: Nah, that’s for when you have trouble beating people up.

Tahu: SHUT UP! *Beats Bulk with his sword*

Some of those might be a little long, but that is what I think is amazing enough for possible sig status. The best one is probably:

Makuta: I think we should ban alternate universes. He clearly has too much time on his hands.

As for the homework, I'll vote for Nex. Time for him to get back at Fortis.

[Hurricane iBrow]

I'll add your top recommendation to my siggy now, along with a notification that Chapter 4 is here. Woot!

Also, Nex vote noted. Bulk is so going down!

-ibrow

[Norik The Blood Elf]

Hopefully Nex, Bulk as usual and Fortis, with Nex correct. Go, Nex!

My three recommendations, but your present onre is good.

Bulk: The direction our relationship is taking bothers me Tahu. I think we should go to marriage counselling.

Nex: You and Tahu are married?

Bulk: Of course not! I just don’t think there’s any sort of other counselling that might come close to fitting the bill.

Fortis: In my extremely deep and manly voice, I shall say that perhaps you should just get regular counselling.

Bulk: Nah, that’s for when you have trouble beating people up.

Vezok: I’m not sure it’s a love triangle. Nex loves Breez and Breez loves Fortis, but Fortis clearly doesn’t love Breez.

Tahu: SILENCE! ANOTHER MINUS FIVE HERO POINTS NEX, BECAUSE YOU COMPLAINED:

Tahu: THE HOMEWORK TONIGHT IS TO NAME IBROW’S FIRST BZPOWER NAME!

Vezok: Who’s iBrow?

Vezon: What’s BZPower?

Nex: His first name?

Edited by Norik Ta Hagah, Jan 13 2012 - 12:54 AM.

[Nujanii: Kanohi Master]

Bulk. Definitely Bulk. Also, I want him to do it the best without alternate universes.

As for a sigworthy quote, you can't do much better than your current one.

[Hurricane iBrow]

2 votes Nex, 1 vote Bulk.
The current quote will stay where it is then. Perhaps after each chapter I will include a sig-worthy line or two. Might help with advertising.

-ibrow

[Meta Nuva]

Bulk. Sorry Nex, but there's always nex time .

I don't know HOW they'd complete the hw though...

Good chappy. And quote. KUTGW, iBrow.

~TTG~

[Hurricane iBrow]

2 Nex, 2 Bulk. Tiebreaker necessary.
Also, Bulk has alternate universes- that's explanation enough for how he'd complete it.

-ibrow

[The Lonesome Wanderer]

I have hust started reading this, and I love it!

I vote vezon, because him getting it right would be extreamly ironic

[Hurricane iBrow]

This chapter begins a six-part "mini series" in How to Be a Hero, where the class (except for those absent/dead/suspended) will try to capture three unlucky students being used as makeshift villains; however, this one is more of an introduction than anything else.

Also, this mini series will see the debut of several new characters that we saw the names of in Tahu's class list in Chapter 3.

How to Be a Hero
Capture the Villain, Part 1
Chapter 5 - What
iBrow Comedy Productions

Friday:

Tahu: ALRIGHT CLASS, LISTEN UP! I WANT TO GET THE HOMEWORK OUT THE WAY RIGHT NOW!

Makuta: Psh, that’ll never happen.

Nex: Oh! I did the homework! I did the homework! Your first BZP name was-

Bulk: Hush up man, I did the homework. Those hero points belong to me.

Nex: No way!

Bulk: Yes way.

Tahu: SHUT UP! BOTH OF YOU WRITE IT ON A SHEET OF PAPER!

Both Nex and Bulk did so before flashing their answers to Tahu, who sighed.

Tahu: It seems you are both correct. Bulk, take five Hero Points.

Bulk: You bet! I’m one fifth of the way to becoming a true hero now!

Tahu: Sure Bulk. Whatever.

Bulk: Ugh.

Nex: What I about me? I did the homework too.

Breez: Yeah, where are Nex’s points?

Nex: You want me to get my Hero Points?

Breez: Of course, why wouldn’t I?

Nex: Awesome! Score 13 for Nex!

Furno: 13 is an unlucky number Nex. You might want to try and squeeze another comment out of her soon.

Nex: Hey Breez, you look beautiful today!

Breez: ...thanks?

Furno: I said get her to comment you, not the other way around, stupid!

Tahu: FURNO! OFFICE! NEX- MINUS FIVE HERO POINTS, MEANING YOU GAIN NOTHING!

Nex: I hate this class.

Furno: Tell me about it... I’m virtually living in the office these days, and all the secretary does is eat doughnuts.

Breez: Isn’t the secretary Mr. Makuro?

Furno: Yeah.

Breez: Ew.

Tahu: ALL OF YOU SHUT UP! FURNO! GET TO THE OFFICE NOW!

Furno: One more chance sir, that’s all I’m asking for. Just one chance.

Tahu: ...

Furno: Please?

Tahu: ...

Furno: Please do not make me get on my knees and beg. That would be humiliating for a role model to children.

Vezok: I am going to stab that stupid blimp in the gut.

Tahu: Office.

Furno: Sigh. Alright, see you all tomorrow.

Tahu: And tell the secretary I wish to have you suspended.

Furno: ... you’re kidding.

Tahu: DO I LOOK LIKE I’M KIDDING?!

Furno: Nope.

Tahu: That’s too bad, because I am.

Furno: I hate you.

Tahu: ... I’m going to ignore that, because I have something to explain to you all that should be fun.

Makuta: Fun for you to explain, or fun for us?

Tahu: Both. Actually, just the latter.

Makuta: Wicked.

Tahu: ALRIGHT, LISTEN UP! NEXT WEEK WE WILL BE PLAYING A GAME WE HERE CALL “CAPTURE THE VILLAIN”!

Makuta: This sounds awesome. You all have one guess as to who he’ll make the villain.

Tahu: IT IS RUN BY ONE OF OUR TEACHERS HERE WHO GOES BY THE NAME OF ALDOUS WITCH-

Stormer: Great, that guy. I absolutely loved him in the storyline.

Furno: Was that for real.

Stormer: No. Complete sarcasm.

Tahu: -AND HAS TO DO WITH THREE STUDENTS FROM EACH CLASS PLAYING THE ROLE OF THE “VILLAINS”, AND THE REST OF THE CLASS TRYING TO CATCH THEM AND STOP THEM.

Makuta: Alright then, you all have three guesses. My bad.

Tahu: FROM THIS CLASS, I HAVE CHOSEN THESE THREE STUDENTS TO BE THE VILLAINS....

Bulk: I have a really nasty feeling about this.

Furno: Now that you mentioned it, so do I.

Tahu: THE FIRST VILLAIN IS DUNKAN BULK, THE SOUNDREL.

Bulk: Yeah, totally not a surprise.

Tahu: THE SECOND VILLAIN IS JULIUS NEX, FOR THAT HORRENDOUS LACK OF HERO POINTS.

Nex: It’s not my fault!

Tahu: Minus five Hero Points.

Nex: See?

Tahu: Minus five more Hero Points. Shut your trap!

Makuta: My chances are dwindling into the single digits.

Tahu: AND THE STUDENT WHO WILL BE THE LEADER OF OUR TRIO OF VILLAINS IS MAKUTA.

Makuta: Awesome!!!

Tahu: ...

Makuta: Um, I mean, uh... crud?

Tahu: ...son, I am-

Makuta: Don’t. That’s over used.

Tahu: -... so not surprised by your response.

Makuta: Nice save.

Tahu: Thanks.

Breez: So you mean I have to fight Nex?

Tahu: Yes.

Breez: Aw...

Nex: Score 14 for Nex baby! Groovy!

Breez: That was a pretty groovy statement there.

Nex: Score 15! At twenty the first real hints will show up!

Breez: Mood killer.

Nex: Hot chocolate?

Tahu: ENOUGH! You will all separate into teams to try and track them down Monday- here they are: Team One is Carapar, Daniel Rocka, Gorast, Jimi Stringer, and Kopaka.

Kopaka: Why am I even in this class?

Makuta: It’s about time you said something, chump.

Tahu: Team two is Mazeka, Meltdown, Merrick Fortis, Natalie Breez-

Breez: Squeal! Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!

Nex: Sigh....

Tahu: - and Preston Stormer. Team Three is Rotor, Nathan Evo, Vezok, Vezon, and William Furno. Zaktan and Turaga Dume will act as those lame guys who inform you of everything going on, and of course I will be monitoring and recording you all.

Furno: Those lame guys! They’re so lame!

Makuta: Indeed they are. For once we agree in something.

Furno: Ew! Stop agreeing with me, monster!

Tahu: PLUS FIVE HERO POINTS TO FURNO FOR ALREADY DISAGREEING WITH THE VILLAINS!

Nex: I do not want to see what this is going to do to my resumé.

Breez: Don’t worry Nex, my team will capture you as soon as possible, meaning you won’t have to do anything villainous!

Nex: Score 16, she’s going out of her way to help me!

Makuta: Evil plan forms! Institute long overdue evil grin!

Nex: ...

Bulk: ...

Makuta: What?

Bulk: ... let’s go into my portal and discuss our plan of action.

In Bulk’s Alternate Universe Thingy:

Bulk: So what exactly is the plan?

Makuta: Well, Nex is going to go back and be happy and everything about the fact that he’s just going to take over the doughnut shop across the street-

Nex: You mean Tim Hortons?

Makuta: Ew, no! I mean Dunkin’ Donuts.

Nex: Oh.

Makuta: Anyway, he’ll be all like “yay, I don’t have to do anything!” and then Breez’s group will go there. However, instead I’ll be waiting there for them, with genetically mutated donuts that, when eaten by Breez and Fortis, will cause both of them to become lovey-dovey with each other.

Nex: I hate this plan.

Makuta: This is only for one week, relax.

Nex: I only have a month to make sure Breez stays on my side.

Makuta: Fine. You’ll be there, not me, and when Breez eats the donuts she’ll become lovey-dovey about you.

Nex: That actually sounds like a far more villainous plan. But Breez will like me, so I’ll do it.

Bulk: And me?

Makuta: You’ll mutter to yourself about the library in the school- when Furno’s team gets there however, you’ll have a portal here, which you will of course be inside, monitoring. When they enter you’ll trap them in some sort of trap they won’t be able to escape within the week.

Bulk: Awesome.

Makuta: Meanwhile, I shall mutter to myself about waiting in Turaga Nokama’s apartment building complex; when Kopaka’s team searches there, they shall realize that I am not there. When they return to Turaga Dume and Zaktan, they will find both of them standing there. However, those will be holograms, and I will trap them with Zaktan and Turaga Dume in the zone of shadows or whatever it’s called for the entire week.

Nex: Sounds like a plan.

Bulk: Indeed, this is good. Let’s do this!

Back at the Classroom:

Tahu: You all should really be getting together and figuring out a plan.

Furno: Nah, a real hero learns on the job.

Tahu: What if you walk into a trap you can’t escape from?

Furno: We won’t run into any of those.

To Be Continued....

No homework, for obvious reasons. However, please pick out any lines that are sig worthy!

-ibrow

[JL v2]

I hate you iBrow.
You got me slightly attracted....
to Breeze.

****.