83 replies to this topic

[Toa Zehvor MT]

Well, I managed to get the plot spoiled for me anyway, so oh well.

In all actuality, I'm kinda glad it did get spoiled. The ending was so stupid, I don't even want to buy the game anymore. In fact, I think I'm done with the series as a whole. That was just...

That was so bad, I would have preferred the whole "it's a dream" cop out to that.

But now, the ending practically lets Halo 4 secure it.

I don't know about that. Despite how bad AC3 and ME3's endings were, there have been some fantastic games this year. Borderlands 2 was an incredible sequel that went above and beyond what the already great original did, and Dishonored was another fantastic title that really, in all honesty, produced in my opinion a better assassin's experience to the AC games so far, and did it all while incorporating some supernatural elements, but not feeling stupid. Xenoblade was another great game with a good story, marking the first time in quite a while that the Wii has had any sort of decent third party game to speak of.

There's also some others, like Journey, XCom, Torchlight, and GW2 that I'd like to get around to eventually.

But no, I don't think Halo 4 has anything wrapped up. In fact, considering they have an entirely new development team coming in, along with an entirely new branch of storyline and new enemies, I wouldn't put a head scratching ending past them, either. I sincerely hope that doesn't happen...but I'll reserve any predictions for GoTY that I have until after its release.

(which is rapidly approaching, I might add)

-MT

[JL v2]

Ignoring timezones, 6 days.

Although it does take time to get to where I am.....

Hopefully not a long time.

And I did Pre-Order the LE (From Mighty Ape), so maybe I'll have a chance to talk about the 'limited' things which was quite literally a massive scam and ripoff by Microsoft.

And watch them stay limited as the game progresses.

[JL v2]

Chapter 43: You know your friend sucks if he shouts at people over the internet.

 

Somewhere above the Indian Ocean...

 

Aexid sat on his throne room. Swiveling his chair left and right, he pressed the A button on his controller. "Ah.....Halo 4. The game created by those money-cowing milks." Selecting to play online, he said to nobody else around him, "What k/d do you think I'd get, hm? 0.23, like the last Halo? Hmm, hmm. Thats a good prediction. But, I would like you al to know, my loyal subjects, that.....I've made a Montage!!!"

 

The wind blew.

 

"And that signifies an increase in skill. Obviously my new k/d would at least be 3.14, isn't that right, subjects?" The wind, this time, didn't blow. "Fine, fine. Go ahead and just watch me pwn all the n00bs. Mostly 10 year olds from 'Murica with dang oblivious parents. Why couldn't I have an oblivious parent? If they were oblivious they wouldn't have forced the world to be it's slave. Oh well."

 

Tapping his feet on the ground as the game slowly searched for a lobby to join, the monitor eventually showed a lobby.

 

It also showed hacks, or as Aexid called them.

 

As the lobby came up, Aexid put on his mic, and instantly heard a screaming voice, obviously belonging to a rager. "I'LL PWN ALL YOU NOOBS DANGIT!" the rager said. Aexid calmly replied (Since nobody else actually had a mic), "Oh sit down, buddy. I'll pwn you before you pwn me."

 

"NOPE! I'LL BEAT YOU, SO BAD, YOU'LL THINK I'M HACKING!"

 

Aexid smiled.

 

=====

 

 

Somewhere in the Apartment...

 

Hahli Mahri: Hey, Jaller. You know thermal expansion, right? You're a Toa of Fire.

Jaller Mahri: Huh? Uh, yeah. Sure.

Hahli Mahri: So......um.......if I heated up my brea-

Hewkii Mahri: No, you flat-chested woma- (SMASH!)

Hahli Mahri: I.....said.....BREAD! Stupid boys.

Somewhere in the bedroom: I'LL PWN ALL YOU NOOBS DANGIT!

Hahli Mahri: (Faceplant) Somebody, make him shut up.

 

In the bedroom.....

 

Furno: Grrrr......*click click* Why won't he die?
Aexid: BECAUSE I'M BETTER THAN YOU! HAHAHA!

Furno: No! I'll beat you! Look! I already got my sniper from my ordnance!

Aexid: Yeah, well Ordnance is Random! But guess what? I got my skillful hax!

Furno: Wait, what? Hacks aren't skillful!

Aexid: Yeah they are! You need time and money to create a modded haxbox 360! And as we all know, Time and Money is what's required from girls! So you could say I tamed a girl to give me all her time and money! Which requires skill!

Furno: You....WHAT? 

Aexid: (Snipes Furno)

Furno: Dude, you ####### hacker! I'm reporting you!

Aexid: Hahaha! Do it! Lets see who at Microsoft cares!

Furno: (Turns to Stormer) Um, could you, go and, uh, teleport JL back here?

Stormer: Where did he go?
Furno: Apparently somebody got a phone call saying they were in the US. You should be able to track them.

Stormer: With what?

Furno:.....Nuparu's Stupidity Tracker 9000.

 

Later...

 

Stormer: HNNNNGH! (Pushes the Stupidity Tracker 9000 to the teleporter) Right! Finally! So, we just turn this on, annnnnnd it shows us the most stupid people ever. And number 1 on that list is at......(Checks location)....here. Right. Says he's also the one playing the Xbox 360 right now. Riiiiiiiight.

Nuparu: Um, lets get to work, We can recalibrate the quantum efficiency physics for it to search for specific people, by creating an alternate current in the space-time continuum so you can use ideas and recognization to send your quantum brainwaves into the machine, which can then detect any similar persons of similar name, shape, size and stupidity.

Stormer:...English please?

Nuparu: Um.....If you have a retarted person that you want to kill, think about him and we can find him.

Stormer: Oh.

Nuparu: So we're looking for JL, right? We can just think of him, and we'll know. 

Stormer: Ok. Thanks for the help! But why is Furno at the top of the stupidest people list?

Nuparu: Possibly because his lack of neurons and perhaps how each dendrite and axon are in some way genetically modified to be-

Stormer: English?
Nuparu: 'What did you expect.'

Stormer: Oh.

Stupidity Detector 9000: Ping! Ping!

Nuparu: Oh, we've found him. He's in America. Why is he in America? I thought he went to Disney. Which still makes no sense to me.

Stormer: Yeah, everything around us makes no sense. So we can just turn on the teleporter and find them. (Turns on teleporter, sets location, and pokes head through)

 

=====

 

In 'Murica, as the native residents like to call it....

 

Stormer: (Pops head out of portal)
JL: Woah what the heck sweet baby chocolate!

Tahu:......So you didwads finally decided to come and get us, did you.

Stormer: Yeah.....Furno needs some help with the Xbox 360. Says he needs you.

JL: Wow. I feel so ###### honored.

Karo: You should! Somebody in this world actually needs your help with something!
Stormer: *Murmuring* Yeah, and that person is the stupidest one on the world. I would feel honored too.

Karo: What was that? 

Stormer: Oh, no, nothing. It's all k, ok?

JL: Yeah, sure? Anyways, yay. I can finally get on the Xbox 360.

Stormer: Errr....about that....

Tahu Nuva: *Jumps through portal*

Tahu: *Follows*

Stormer: Right. Yeah, lets just get over here. I feel like this portal might close on my neck, severing my head.

JL: Um....ok. *Jumps through*

Karo: What about me? Guys? I've afraid its all just a lie...*Jumps in*

 

=====

 

Back in the Apartment...

 

JL: We're back. Ok.....so who needs help again?
Stormer: Furno. He's...raging.

JL: Ah, the classic 10 year old. Easily handled by a skilled pro-

Stormer: He's playing a hacker. He's too stupid to know it, but I could tell.

JL: Oh. That....means he might DDOS us! So....report him! Its not like Microsoft will let us to anything else.

Furno: Yeah, thats the issue. How do you report someone?
JL:...

Furno:...

Tahu:...

Tahu Nuva:...

Stormer:...

JL:...

Karo:....I have no idea why we're doing this.

JL: You...click 'report'.

Furno:.....Ooooooooooh. Kthx. *Presses Report Player*

 

 

=====

 

Microsoft Support: Oh, another report. Lets just ignore it, because we have to make sure our service is 100% useless, so people will keep on buying new stuff in order to play.

Hydrona: *Appears and snaps fingers* Human, you will ban that Xbox 360.

Microsoft Support: I...I will ban that Xbox 360.....why? That means our service will work.

Hydrona: *Snaps fingers* Because the annoying user of that Xbox 360 hid a tornado in my underwear as a joke. Made it look like I farted a dang water vortex into existence.

Microsoft Support: That...that sounds harsh. Yes, I will ban the user of that Xbox 360.

Hydrona: Good. *Disappears*

[Toa Zehvor MT]

I remember promising a while back to complain about flaws that I found...so I'll go ahead and keep said promise for this chapter.

 

Aexid sat on his throne room. Swiveling his chair left and right, he pressed the A button on his controller. "Ah.....Halo 4. The game created by those money-cowing milks." Selecting to play online, he said to nobody else around him, "What k/d do you think I'd get, hm? 0.23, like the last Halo? Hmm, hmm. Thats a good prediction. But, I would like you al to know, my loyal subjects, that.....I've made a Montage!!!"

Just wait until Aexid compares his montage with Master Chief from Arby n the Chief's one.

 

 

Hahli Mahri: Hey, Jaller. You know thermal expansion, right? You're a Toa of Fire.

Jaller Mahri: Huh? Uh, yeah. Sure.

Hahli Mahri: So......um.......if I heated up my brea-

Hewkii Mahri: No, you flat-chested woma- (SMASH!)

Hahli Mahri: I.....said.....BREAD! Stupid boys.

Somewhere in the bedroom: I'LL PWN ALL YOU NOOBS DANGIT!

Hahli Mahri: (Faceplant) Somebody, make him shut up.

This scene(and this chapter by extension)...was just an incredible pile of "what in the world" for me, which seems kind of out of place for a comedy which I've really enjoyed a lot for nearly its entirety. Scene's incredibly random, the dialogue doesn't make any sense whatsoever, and I believe the innuendo in the scene is against the rules as well. It really doesn't seem to have anything to do with the rest of the comedy; some explanation as to what in the world was going on in the first place would be nice as well.

 

Not trying to be overly harsh, but this scene really stuck out to me as a major "what the heck."

 

The actions undertaken by the characters throughout the entirety of this chapter seem far less thought out and much more spontaneous and random than they have been in the past. The action jumps from scene to scene with little explanation for what's going on or any real time to develop a humorous situation. I've often found that if you're going to try and run multiple scenes in one comedy at a time, you're going to want said scenes to progress through multiple chapters, so that you have time to develop them. None of these scenes relate back to previous chapters at all, so everything seems random and completely spur of the moment. While reasoning in comedies is by no means ever completely sound, just having characters suddenly decide to do something with no development as to why they want to do that or explanation as to what they're attempting to accomplish by it is essentially the same as just saying "pie" and expecting it to be funny. A little randomness here and there makes things funny, a lot of randomness everywhere dilutes it and it loses its humor value quicker then nearly anything else.

 

I realize it's the first chapter in a while for this comedy, so I wouldn't be overly worried, but nonetheless this chapter is a big step back from the quality you've been delivering on beforehand.

 

-MT

Edited by MT Zehvor, Feb 11 2013 - 11:49 PM.