9 replies to this topic

[Damaracx 7.0]

This is where u can review the topic HERO RECON TEAM ALPHA 8. A new chapter will be posted in every 12 hrs.

Edited by TOA PIRAKA HAKANN 2.0, Mar 02 2012 - 05:52 PM.

[Hahli Husky]

As per the Epics Forum Rules, you can only post one chapter per 12 hours. This is to keep people from overloading the forum. I merged your recent chapter with your first one, but you may post the second chapter again once it's been 12 hours since your first chapter.

Edited by Hahli Husky, Feb 29 2012 - 04:16 PM.

[Ultimate Sybre]

Seems good so far, but you need to check the grammar. And the first part had no action at all. It just described a Hero being built.

[Damaracx 7.0]

Seems good so far, but you need to check the grammar. And the first part had no action at all. It just described a Hero being built.

That was the point of it.

[Ultimate Sybre]

Seems good so far, but you need to check the grammar. And the first part had no action at all. It just described a Hero being built.

That was the point of it.

Oh. But what you could do about the grammar is run the epic through Microsoft Office Word and it could find grammar errors and even spelling errors.

[Damaracx 7.0]

Seems good so far, but you need to check the grammar. And the first part had no action at all. It just described a Hero being built.

That was the point of it.

Oh. But what you could do about the grammar is run the epic through Microsoft Office Word and it could find grammar errors and even spelling errors.

That is what did. and all the grammar is correct.

[Baltarc]

Word may think the story's grammar is correct, but according to actual rules of grammar it's pretty much as incorrect as incorrect can be. The grammar is a major issue, as it makes it difficult and tedious to read.

In addition, there is nothing about the story thus far that makes me want to read more of it. A hero was built. That's it. You said that that's the point, but the point is that that shouldn't be the point. There has to be more to it than that.

[Damaracx 7.0]

Word may think the story's grammar is correct, but according to actual rules of grammar it's pretty much as incorrect as incorrect can be. The grammar is a major issue, as it makes it difficult and tedious to read.

In addition, there is nothing about the story thus far that makes me want to read more of it. A hero was built. That's it. You said that that's the point, but the point is that that shouldn't be the point. There has to be more to it than that.

Could you please point these grammar mistakes out and BTW I am only on chapter 3 just give me some time to let the story mature plus chapter 4 is supposed to catch everones attention. BTW the rules of grammar are constantly changing almost as much as the definition of a planet.

Edited by TOA PIRAKA HAKANN 2.0, Mar 01 2012 - 05:48 PM.

[Baltarc]

I have copied the first two chapters and placed them in a word document, along with my corrections of grammatical errors. Things added are highlighted in yellow, things that should be removed are highlighted in green. I also added a few comments about ways I thought it could be improved.

Basic rules of grammar change rarely, if ever. Only trivial things - like whether the possessive form of "James" is "James's" or "James'" - change.

When I'm undecided on whether to read something, I pick it up off the shelf and read the first chapter. If it's interesting and makes me want to keep reading - usually by mysteriously introducing the villain, cryptically hinting at later plot developments, or placing the protagonist in an action-packed and/or suspenseful situation - I take it to the front of the library and check it out. If it starts off too slow, I just put it back on the shelf and look for something else.

[Damaracx 7.0]

I have copied the first two chapters and placed them in a word document, along with my corrections of grammatical errors. Things added are highlighted in yellow, things that should be removed are highlighted in green. I also added a few comments about ways I thought it could be improved.

Basic rules of grammar change rarely, if ever. Only trivial things - like whether the possessive form of "James" is "James's" or "James'" - change.

When I'm undecided on whether to read something, I pick it up off the shelf and read the first chapter. If it's interesting and makes me want to keep reading - usually by mysteriously introducing the villain, cryptically hinting at later plot developments, or placing the protagonist in an action-packed and/or suspenseful situation - I take it to the front of the library and check it out. If it starts off too slow, I just put it back on the shelf and look for something else.

Ok well just wait I am working on chapter 4 which is were the fun begins it will be uploaded in 1hr and 22 mins.

Edited by TOA PIRAKA HAKANN 2.0, Mar 05 2012 - 09:23 PM.