Posted Aug 05 2012 - 11:23 PM
Haven't dropped in here in a while. But I wanted to share some comments about the epic thus far and I've reached all the way to part 8, which was the current chapter.
There are quite a few details here that keep reaching out to me. First off the Characters, and the first character I'll talk about is Evior.
It's interesting about Evior, because despite his purpose to be perfect and a lethal assassin, it's shown he has some serious flaws. He's already double checking his standards and morality, and his powers while various, aren't unlimited in supply and lack quality. To be honest, I'm rethinking about the reasons Evior was made in the first place, and somehow I feel like once we reach the end of this epic it's going to reveal that Evior has been being used by the Makuta since day one.
As far as his character development goes (maybe not his character back story and the character himself), it's solid. I thought he was a an okay character at first, but he's raising the bar. His change is really believable considering he's not anywhere near the perfect "Faux Makuta" he was made to be (or that I thought he was at the beginning of the epic). It's obvious why he's doubting himself. The being has been given complete freewill and has never seen anything outside shadows all his life, so I feel like a new scenery should surprise him. I'm interested in where he's going to end up, and though I believe he's going to be joining the good team at the end, his reasons for doing so will be a principle part of this epic. I look oh so forward to it!
For the next, my favorite character is Ineha so far, and by far. She has a clear view on things, on what she wants to become and what should happen. Constantly reading her frustrations about her not reaching her goals, really relates to the reader. She has great skills, but having misfortune continue to plague her is realistic. She's tough and straight forward, but very caring toward her friends and even Evior to a degree or as much as she'll allow. She's not annoyingly powerful or all knowing and stereotypical like a LOT of rougher characters can be. And her dialogue with her mentor and Evior is good, which often isn't very deep or symbolic and just real conversations with a hint of heart in them that drive the story forward. (Do not change those conversations! <3)
If I have anything bad to say, I think it's the pace of the plot... I like the story, but I'm wondering what the Makuta are going to think once they find out that Evior has saved Ineha. And also now that she's hurt, I'm wondering how long it'll take for her to heal. And will her journey continue to dwell in the fortress or will she make it to Metru Nui? And another person I'm wondering about is Faux Ducha, who I hoped would get a little more time and back story. :/ It's going a little slow, or I'm totally wrong and maybe I'm just really anxious. Either way, the quality of the writing matters, and it's fantastic!
And that's all I really have, since this epic is more character driven I thought I'd give my thoughts. =D I'm really enjoying the epic so far, and I think you're doing a wonderful job, which knowing your stuff, that's to be expected! Evior has my attention, Ineha has me hooked, and both are continuing to get better.