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[spyder ryder]

Chapter 1
In which we meet our villainous heroes

Situated in the middle of the woods of Metru-Nui was a small, ramshackle shed. It was made of a variety of scavenged and stolen wood, and was slightly tilted to one side. Several signs surrounded the structure, with words of warning scribbled on them, such as ‘Keep out! Trespassers will be robbed and dumped in the lake!’.

“Meeting in session,” Vezon said as he banged the gavel on the old crate that served as the table. The three other members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club looked at him from around the crate. To his right was the slightly nerdy Spiriah, who peered out at the world through thick glasses and was wearing a polyester sweater-vest. Sitting across the crate was the large and intimidating Nocturn, who had been held back twice. To Vezon’s left sat the awkwardly-tall-and-skinny Roodaka, wearing a grey schoolgirl uniform. Vezon reached under the crate and pulled out the Notebook of Unfathomable Evil. “Our first order of business is to finish our discussion of the best possible way to get Ms. Helryx fired.”

“Maybe we could blackmail her,” offered Spiriah. Vezon retrieved a pencil from a pocket on his grass-stained overalls and wrote down the suggestion.

“Good, good,” said the Skakdi, “Any more ideas?”

“Well,” mused Roodaka as she twirled one of her long pigtails in her hand, “Perhaps we could slip sleeping pills in her coffee. Then we could tell Principal Artahka she’s sleeping on the job.”

“Steal her car?” suggested Nocturn. Vezon busily scribbled all of this down on in the Notebook of Unfathomable Evil.

“Second order of business,” he said, “Now that we’ve been banned from the Candy store on account of the salamander incident, where are we going to get our candy?” Everyone, including Vezon, laughed.

“It’s obvious,” giggled Roodaka, “We’ll steal it from the Toa-losers.”

“They’re down at the creek right now,” Spiriah said.

“Meeting adjourned,” Vezon said hurriedly, “Let’s go get some candy!” Everyone stood up from the crate and scurried out of the rundown shed that served as their clubhouse.


True to Spiriah’s words, the six Toa that made up the Super-Mega-Awesome-Team were down at the creek trying to catch tadpoles for the school assignment.

“There’s one!” shouted Tahu.

“I got it!” cried Pohatu as he raised a boulder over his head. Gali suddenly jumped in front of him.

“No!” she shouted, “What are you doing?”

“Catching tadpoles,” answered Pohatu. Gali sighed and put her hand to her forehead.
“Go over and guard the jar,” she said, “We’ll handle the tadpoles.”

“Okay!” beamed Pohatu as he eagerly went over to guard the jar the Toa planned to house the tadpoles.

“Hey, did anyone catch last night’s episode of Bat-Toa?” Onua asked as he swung a net into the water.

“You mean the one where he and Robin-Matoran have to solve-figure-out those clue-hints left by the Joker-Makuta?” Lewa asked excitedly, “Boy, that was awesome!”

“Could you two please focus?” Kopaka sighed, “We have to get this project done.”

“Aw, don’t be such a stick in the mud, iceman,” Lewa said. Suddenly a voice broke through the woods.

“Well, well, well,” said Roodaka’s voice, “It looks like the mud-eating Toa are after fish.”

“Tadpoles are amphibians,” said Spiriah’s voice.

“Did I ask for your opinion?” snapped Roodaka.

“It’s not an opinion, it’s a fact.” There was a sudden sound like a fist hitting a Kanohi. The Toa watched as four of the most vile beings in Metru-Nui stepped out of a nearby bush. Spiriah was tenderly rubbing his nose.

“What do you want?” asked Tahu, as the other Toa began to cluster behind him. Roodaka, who stood in the lead, laughed wickedly.

“We want candy, frog-face,” she said, “So hand it over or else we‘ll make you even uglier!”

“But that’s stealing,” said Pohotu.

“Thank you, Captain Obvious,” said Spiriah. Vezon took out his slingshot and aimed it at the Toa.

“Fork over the candy!” he said. Nocturn walked over to the Toa and grabbed them all in his four arms. He then proceeded to shake them upside down. A paperclip and a rubber band fell out of their pockets, but there was no candy whatsoever. Roodaka sneered at the Toa.

“Where’s the candy, booger-brains?” she said as she whacked Lewa on the head.

“We don’t have it with us,” said Kopaka, “Who brings candy with them when they’re catching tadpoles?”

“Fine then, you little freaks,” said Roodaka, “We’ll just take your paperclip and rubber band!”

“You can have it, horse-face,” said Tahu. Everyone grew silent as Roodaka gave Tahu a murderous look. Nocturn hurriedly dropped the Toa and returned to his place behind the Vortixx.

“Horse-face?” she hissed through clenched teeth. Her associates slowly backed away from her. They knew this was a touchy issue for Roodaka.

“Yeah, horse-face,” continued Tahu, “I bet when you wanted a pony, your parents told you to go look in a mirror.”

“My daddy could buy me a pony if I wanted one!” Roodaka roared furiously, “He could buy me a million ponies!”

“That’d be good,” snickered Lewa, “Then you wouldn’t be lonely.” Roodaka was so enraged that she could barely talk.

“I-…You…” she sputtered. Roodaka’s face turned an interesting shade of scarlet.

“Would you like a carrot?” Tahu asked mockingly. This was the last straw for Roodaka. She leapt at the red Toa and forced him to the ground.

“I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU!” she screeched over and over again as she pummeled him into the dirt. Vezon and the others pulled the hysterical Vortixx off of Tahu as the Toa carried the red being to safety. The Ultra-Super-Secret- Evildoers-Club dragged the kicking and screaming Roodaka back to the clubhouse.

“I’LL KILL HIM!” she shrieked in her in her shrill voice, “I’LL KILL HIM ’TIL HE’S DEAD!”


Around three hours later when Roodaka had calmed down, the four children once again sat down around the crate.

“Okay,” said Vezon, “Now that that idea has only succeeded in bringing us horrible misery, does anyone know anywhere else we could find candy?”

“The only other place to get it from is the store,” said Spiriah, “And we’re not allowed in there.” Vezon sighed and turned to Roodaka.

“Roodaka, your parents are obscenely rich, why can’t you just get your to buy some for us?”

“Why should I do that?” Roodaka said sulkily, “What have you ever done for me?”

“We prevented you from committing homicide today,” answered Spiriah.

“Alright,” grunted Roodaka, “I’ll get us some candy.”


Word Count: 1079

Edited by spyder ryder, Oct 16 2011 - 11:40 AM.

[Baron Von Nebula]

Nice! Is this related to the flashback from The Villains Go Directly to Jail where the villains are in high school, with Old Man Makuta?

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 2
In which we meet Roodaka's parents

Roodaka’s parents, Mr. and Mrs. Equine, were the richest people in Metru-Nui. They were both lawyers and lived in a large and ominous mansion at the edge of town. There was a rumor among the students of Mata Nui Elementary School that the Equines were vampires. Whether or not this was true wouldn’t have changed their opinion of them. The four members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club stood at the forbidding iron gates of the creepy estate.

“I changed my mind,” Spiriah said as he turned around, “You don’t have to ask them for money.” Roodaka grabbed him by the back of his shirt.

“You’re not going anywhere,” she hissed. Spiriah sighed and turned around. Nocturn opened the gates and allowed Roodaka to go first. She was always entitled to go first, she had told them, because she was a girl. No one wanted to argue with her, so they made this an official rule in the Notebook of Unfathomable Evil. As the four made their way to the dark and creepy mansion, Vezon noticed the numerous plants that were growing in the decorative garden.

“Hey, who’s growing the poison ivy and nightshade?” Vezon knew all about poisonous plants on account that he and his family lived deep in the forest outside of the city.

“I am,” answered Roodaka. Everyone remained silent on the way to the door after that. After they ascended up the porch, Roodaka threw the door open.

“MOMMY!” she screeched, “DADDY! I’M HOME!” Her shrill voice echoed throughout the cavernous house. The only way to describe the interior of the mansion was to imagine a haunted house that was regularly swept and kept in order. Roodaka strolled inside, followed by her reluctant companions. At the top of the stairs stood two towering Vortixx.

“Yes, Roodaka?” called Mr. Equine. Roodaka stomped up the stairs, not at all intimidated by the creepy beings that were her parents.

“Daddy,” she said as she crossed her arms, “I want money.”

“But darling,” Mrs. Equine said apprehensively, “Your father and I already gave you your money for the week.”

“I want more,” responded the little Vortixx.

“But-”

“I WANT MORE MONEY AND I WANT IT NOW!” screamed Roodaka, “NOW, NOW, NOW!” Her parents turned and looked at each other grimly.

“Alright,” said her father, “I’ll give you some money.” He handed a crisp hundred dollar bill to his daughter. Roodaka smiled sweetly.

“Thank you Daddy,” she said as she skipped down the stairs. She and her companions wasted no time in leaving the house. It was only then that they realized the crucial flaw in their plan.

“Roodaka,” Vezon asked, “I thought we were going to ask your parents to buy the candy?” Spiriah sighed noisily.

“This is great,” he said, “We have money to buy candy with, but there’s no way we can go in the store.”

“Well,” said Vezon, “We could ask someone to do it for us.” Roodaka rolled her eyes at the Skakdi.

“Oh sure, we just hand a hundred dollar bill to a complete stranger and ask him to buy some candy for us. I’m sure that’ll go along fine!”

“How about her?” Vezon said as he gestured to a kindly-looking Ga-Turaga who was sitting on a bench and feeding pigeons bread crumbs.

“I dunno,” said Spiriah, “She looks legit.” Before Roodaka could object, Spiriah snatched the money away from her and walked up to the Ga-Turaga.

“Excuse me,” he asked, “Could you please go to the candy store and buy us some candy?” The Ga-Turaga shot an icy stare at the four.

“I know who you are,” she said as she glared daggers at the children, “You’re the little brats that stole my grandson’s birthday cake!” With no warning whatsoever, the Ga-Turaga swung her purse at Spiriah. The blow sent him tumbling back into his cohorts. Suddenly the Turaga was on her feet and swinging her purse around like a flail.

“You little miscreants!” she shouted as she struck at them.

“Ow Lady!” Vezon said as she hit him on the head, “What’s your problem?” The old lady replied by bashing Nocturn in the face.

“Run away!” cried Spiriah. The four members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club ran down the street with the Ga-Turaga in hot pursuit.

“How can she run this fast?” panted Spiriah.

“No idea,” answered Vezon as he sprinted ahead.


After they finally outran the crazed grandmother, the four slumped against the brick wall that ran bordered the park.

“Mata Nui, I had no idea Turaga were so spry,” said Spiriah, “She almost outran me.”

“It’s not that hard to outrun you, Slug-feet,” said Roodaka. Spiriah glared at her, but said nothing.

“So we’ve gone through all this trouble, and we still have no candy!” Vezon said as he threw his arms up in defeat.

“I wanna break somethin’!” shouted Nocturn.

“Hm,” said Vezon, “You know I could go for some vandalism right now.”

“Me too,” added Spiriah.

“So could I,” said Roodaka. The four huddled together and whispered amongst each other for about ten minutes. Then they hurried down the street, snickering wickedly to themselves.

Word Count: 850

Edited by spyder ryder, Oct 16 2011 - 11:41 AM.

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 3
In which some things are shown and told

That Monday at Mata Nui Elementary School, the only thing the students could talk about was how the statue of Mata Nui by the front doors had mysteriously lost its head. In the fourth-grade class taught by Ms. Helryx, everyone was buzzing about it as well. The only ones who were not talking were the members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club, who sat in the back with huge grins on their faces. At last Principal Artahka’s voice came over the P.A. systems.

“Students of Mata Nui Elementery School,” he said, “I’m sure you’ve all noticed by now that the head of our beloved Mata Nui is missing. I’m here to assure you that we will get it back eventually, and that the perpetrators will be caught and execut- I mean punished. That is all. Have a nice day.” After his announcement Ms. Helryx went up to her seat at the front of the class.

“Good morning children,” she said.

“Good morning Ms. Helryx,” said almost everyone.

“Now, who would like to go first for show and tell?” asked Ms. Helryx. Show and tell was always the first thing to be done in the mornings. Vezon raised his hand and jumped up and down excitedly.

“Ooh! Ms. Helryx! Pick me! Pick me!”

“Yes Vezon,” sighed Ms. Helryx. Vezon hurried to the front of the class, clutching a paper bag.

“This weekend I was out in the woods,” he said enthusiastically, “And I found this!”

“What is it?” Ms. Helryx asked politely.

“It’s a paper bag!” cried Vezon, “Isn’t it amazing?”

“Is there anything inside of it?” asked the Toa.

“I never even thought of that!” Vezon shouted as he opened the bag. Upon seeing what was inside, his grin grew bigger.

“Oh wow, this is awesome! I’ve never seen a bag full of front teeth before! Here, look at this!” he cried as he shoved the bag in Ms. Helryx’s face.

“That’s quite alright,” said Ms. Helryx, “You can go back to your seat now.” The little Skakdi scampered back to his seat.

“Is there anyone else who has anything to show us?” asked Ms. Helryx. The Toa immediately regretted the statement when Roodaka raised her hand.

“Okay then,” said the teacher. The little Vortixx skipped to the front of the classroom with a little smirk on her face, and took out the hundred dollar bill.

“This,” she began, “Is a hundred dollar bill. My daddy gave it to me because he loves me very much. I’m sure your parents don’t give you hundred dollar bills because they don’t love you.” She dangled it in front of everybody. “I get money because I’m special. It’s my money and you can’t have it. So take that, Tahu!” Roodaka stuck out her tongue at the young Toa of fire.

“Okay Roodaka,” Ms. Helryx said, “You can go back now.” The Vortixx went back to her seat with a smug grin on her face. To Ms. Helryx’s dismay, Spiriah raised his hand.

“You too, Spiriah.” sighed the Toa. The Makuta came up to the front and held out a lemon. It was quite an ordinary lemon.

“I’ve been experimenting with lemons for the past three months,” he said, “And I’ve figured out how to do something amazing with them.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful,” said Ms. Helryx, grateful that at least one child in her classroom could accomplish something, “Do they power little light bulbs?”

“Uh, no,” said Spiriah, “They combust.”

“You mean they blow up?!” cried Tahu, “That’s so cool!”

“Can we see it explode?!” shouted Lewa.

“Perhaps later,” said Ms. Helryx as she nudged Spiriah back to his seat. She felt a sinking feeling as Nocturn raised his hand.

“Alright,” she said in exasperation. The four-armed fish being walked up to the front of the classroom.

“Look what I can do,” he said as he picked up Ms. Helryx’s desk and held it over his head.

“Put that down!” cried Ms. Helryx. Nocturn dropped it to the floor, where it broke into pieces.


At recess, The Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club met in their playground headquarters: Underneath the slide. It had used to be under the jungle gym, but unfortunately the Super-Mega-Awesome-Team had kicked them out last week.

“So what do we do with the head?” asked Spiriah.

“We could bury it out in the middle of the woods,” Vezon said ecstatically, “And then we could make this map to where we buried it, and it’d be just like Treasure Island!”

“Oh please,” Roodaka said as she rolled her eyes, “We should hide it in Ms. Helryx’s desk. Then she’d get fired.”

“Can we eat it?” Nocturn asked. Spiriah mulled over the suggestions of his companions. Vezon’s idea was indeed awesome, but impractical. Roodaka’s was devious, but there was a chance they might get caught. Nocturn’s was stupid, but all of his ideas were stupid.

“I’m in favor with Roodaka’s idea,” the Makuta said at last.

Word count: 816

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 4
In which some people lose their head

The next morning the members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club did something entirely out of character for them. They arrived at school early.

“Here’s the plan,” said Spiriah, “Nocturn and I will keep watch. Roodaka, you and Vezon will put the head in the desk. Is everything clear?”

“Transparently,” said Roodaka. The four entered the building and made a beeline for their classroom. Spiriah and Nocturn waited by the door as Vezon and Roodaka went to the teacher’s newly repaired desk.

“It’s locked,” Vezon said as he tried to pull open a drawer.

“You’re not pulling on it right,” Roodaka said as she pushed him out of the way, “Let me do it.” She tried to pull it open, but it wouldn’t budge. She sighed noisily and pulled a bobby pin out of her hair. Roodaka stuck it in the keyhole, turned it slightly, and the drawer popped open.

“That’s awesome!” said Vezon. He took the statue’s head and tried putting it in the drawer. He frowned.

“It won’t fit.” Once again, Roodaka pushed him out of the way.

“Do I have to do everything around here?” she muttered.

“Roodaka? Vezon? What are you doing here?” asked a familiar voice. Both children stiffened up in fear. Slowly they turned around to see their teacher standing over them, arms crossed, with an unhappy look on her face. The two delinquents stared dumbfounded at Ms. Helryx. There was absolute silence for approximately two minutes. Then, all Karzahni broke loose.

“It was Roodaka!” cried the Skakdi.

“It was Vezon!” cried the Vortixx.

“He was trying to put the head in your desk!”

“I tried to stop her, but she was crazy!” Both children continued to babble on about how they caught each other trying to stash the statue’s head in the desk. Ms. Helryx didn’t buy a word of either story.

“I’m very disappointed in the both of you,” she said, “I’m afraid I’ll have to send you to the Principal’s office.” A look of horror stretched across the faces of the two children.

“B-but,” stuttered Vezon.

“I can’t go to the Principal’s office,” cried Roodaka, “I’ve never gotten in trouble before!” This was true, Roodaka’s parents had never punished her in her life. Before anything else could be said, Ms. Helryx grabbed them by the hand and started hauling them down to the office. Once they arrived she seated them in the plastic blue chairs that were right in front of the secretary’s desk. Roodaka and Vezon stared in horror at the secretary, who was the same Ga-Turaga that had chased them down the street.

“These two need to see Mr. Artahka,” said Ms. Helryx, “Please send them back when they’re finished.” The Ga-Turaga smiled.

“Of course,” she said. Ms. Helryx thanked her and left, leaving Roodaka and Vezon alone in the office. The two finally broke out of their shock-induced trance.

“Do you think they’re going to paddle us?” Vezon whispered fearfully.

“They’d better not,” Roodaka said shakily, “Or my daddy would sue them for everything they’ve got.”

“They’re teachers,” said Vezon, “They’ve got immunity ‘cause they work for the government.” Roodaka had never thought about this, and was now absolutely terrified.

“I don’t want to be paddled,” she whimpered.

“Oh, you kids have it easy,” said the Ga-Turaga, “When I was your age they had great big iron sticks they’d hit us with in class. Nowadays they just uses those wimpy oak paddles.” The two guilty children shrank into their chairs.

“I don’t suppose we can have a last request,” asked Vezon.

“What might that be, sonny?” asked the Turaga.

“Could you please tell my parents that all my comics are hidden beneath the corner floorboard in my room?”

“I’ll see what I can do.” At that moment, Principal Artahka emerged from his office. He was a large and intimidating figure, prompting both children to stare at him intently.

“Are you two here to see me?” he asked in a quiet voice.

“That depends,” said Vezon, “Are you going to paddle us?” The Principal sighed.

“Come on in.” Roodaka and Vezon had no choice but to comply. They sat down on two plastic orange chairs as Principal Artahka sat down behind his large wooden desk.

“Now,” he said, “What’s this business with Mata Nui’s head?” The children continued to stare at him quietly, looking very much like frightened owls.

“We…Uh…” said Vezon.

“We found the statue’s head,” said Roodaka, “And we were just giving it Ms. Helryx so that she could give it to you.”

“Yeah,” agreed Vezon. Mr. Artahka gave them both a long, cynical stare.

“I take it you think your Principal is a low-watt bulb?” he said. The two pupils in front of him looked at each other nervously. They suddenly threw themselves to the ground, got on their knees, and began to beg.

“Please don’t paddle us!” bawled Roodaka.

“We promise we’ll never do it again!” added Vezon.

“We can be good,” Roodaka said, “We promise!”

“We’re scum!” Vezon said, “We’re good-for-nothing, lowlife scum!”

“Alright, alright,” Artahka said over the groveling twosome, “I’m wasn’t going to paddle you.” A look of relief washed over the faces of Vezon and Roodaka.

“Thank you sir,” Vezon said graciously.

“We’ll be good from now on,” said Roodaka. Artahka rolled his eyes.

“Yes, now please go back to class,” he muttered. The two children rushed out of the office.


As the two delinquents entered the room, they immediately went for their seats. Nearby sat Spiriah and Nocturn, who smiled weakly as Vezon and Roodaka sat down. If looks could kill, the glare the two beings gave their comrades would have reduced them to ash.

“We saw Ms. Helryx coming,” Spiriah whispered, “We were gonna tell you, but it was too late.”

“You’re going to die today,” Roodaka said, “Very, very painfully.” Roodaka’s fists suddenly made impact with Spiriah’s and Nocturn’s faces. Ms. Helryx turned from the blackboard at the noise.

“Is something wrong?” Spiriah was about to raise his hand, but then saw the icy glare Roodaka shot him. He said nothing. Roodaka smiled and spoke.

“Nothing Ms. Helryx,” said Roodaka, “We’re all fine and dandy back here.”

“That’s good,” said Ms. Helryx as she turned around.

Edited by spyder ryder, Oct 17 2011 - 06:56 PM.

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 5
In which something goes up but doesn't come down.


At recess, Spiriah and Nocturn wasted no time in climbing to the top of the tallest tree in the playground. Roodaka stood at the bottom screaming up at them.

“Come down here and take your punishment!” she screeched, “Or I’ll have my daddy call the lumberyard and have them cut down this tree while you’re still in it!”

“Oh come on,” Spiriah shouted, “Like you wouldn’t have done the same thing we did!”

“He has a point,” Vezon said. Roodaka ignored his comment and stomped on his foot.

“If you’re not coming down here, then I’m coming up there!” cried Roodaka. She grabbed the lowest branch and began to climb up. Vezon shrugged and began to follow her. The entire way up Roodaka ranted and raved about how she was going to kill the traitors.

“First I’m gonna tear off Nocturn’s arms and beat Spiriah with them,” she screamed, “Then I’m gonna use Spiriah’s face to bash Nocturn’s head in!” Above them the two terrified beings tried throwing twigs and acorns at the Vortixx to slow her down.

“I’m gonna pound you first!” roared Nocturn. Roodaka laughed deridingly at his comment.

“Oh please,” she guffawed, “I’m a girl. You can’t hit me.”

“Darn,” muttered Nocturn, “We’re dead.” At that moment a skinny arm grabbed the branch he rested on. Then an enraged face appeared, followed by the rest of an angry Vortixx.

“Prepare to die!” she screeched. She leapt upon the two unlucky beings and mercilessly began to beat them. Vezon then came up, and saw the spectacle.

“Wow!” he exclaimed, “I did not know a spine could bend that way!”

“Don’t just sit there you moron!” cried Spiriah, “Help us!” Vezon looked grimly at the snarling Roodaka.

“Do I have to?”

“YES!” bellowed Spiriah. Vezon sighed and was about to help, when he suddenly looked down. His eyes went wide, and he gulped.

“Uh…guys…” he muttered. They did not appear to hear him, so he spoke a little louder.

“Guys.”

“What?” sneered Roodaka. Vezon pointed downwards. Roodaka glanced down, and yipped. Spiriah and Nocturn looked down, and saw what they saw.

“That’s…That’s a long way down,” gulped Spiriah. Indeed it was. What the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers club failed to realize when they climbed to the top of the tree was that it was a very, very long way down.

“How do we get down?” asked Nocturn.

“We’ll have to climb,” said Spiriah.

“But we could fall,” said Vezon. Spiriah suddenly spotted the Super-Mega-Awesome-Team playing on a nearby basketball court.

“Hey you guys!” he called out, “HELP!” The little Toa below looked up at the four helpless children. They promptly pointed at them and laughed.

“How’d you morons get up there?” Tahu asked.

“That doesn’t matter,” barked Spiriah, “Just get us down!” At that moment the whistle of the yard teacher sounded off, signaling the end of recess.

“Maybe later,” said Onua, “Recess is over.” The four members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club stared openmouthed as their enemies walked inside the building, leaving them stranded in a tree.

“They can’t do that!” cried Roodaka, “They’re supposed to be the good guys!”

“Now what?” asked Nocturn. Spiriah looked at his watch and groaned.

“School’s going to be over in half an hour,” he said, “What are we going to do?”

“Well you’d better figure out something,” Roodaka said, “Because I’m not spending the night up here.” Spiriah glared at the Vortixx.

“You’re the reason we’re up here!” he shouted. Suddenly he grinned. “You know, there is another way to the ground. Would you like to go that way?”

“Which way is that?” asked the Vortixx. Spiriah plucked an acorn off of a branch and tossed it to the ground. Roodaka stared at it and gulped.

“Guys, guys,” Vezon said, “Fighting each other isn’t going to solve anything. We’ve got to find a way to let people know we’re up here.”

“But there’s no one here,” said Nocturn. He was right, the playground was deserted.

“Maybe we can get someone’s attention from the street,” suggested Spiriah. They all turned their attention to the west side of the schoolyard. There was a chain-link fence that separated the grounds from the street and sidewalk. Occasionally a car would drive by.

“I’ve got an idea,” said Vezon. He took an acorn from a branch and put it in his slingshot. Eventually another car drove by. As it passed Vezon shot the acorn. It went right through the windshield, and the car swerved off the road into a lamppost on the other side of the street. The children stared wide-eyed as an angry Toa emerged from the car and started screaming profanity. They slowly hid themselves amongst the leaves, and did not come out for several hours.


By nightfall, the four were still stuck in the tree.

“Move over,” whined Roodaka, “I don’t have enough room!”

“Nobody does,” grunted Spiriah, “What makes you so special?”

“I’m Roodaka,” said the Vortixx, “My daddy says I’m the most important girl in the world!”

“Well your daddy‘s not here right now,” said Nocturn, “So shut up.”

“Do you guys think we’ll see any UFOs?” Vezon said as he looked up at the stars, “Maybe the aliens will help us!”

“Speaking of which,” said Spiriah, “When is the mother ship coming to pick you up?” Vezon ignored him and continued to scan the sky for any saucer-shaped aircraft. Suddenly a loud boom sounded off in the distance.

“Uh-oh…” mumbled Spiriah. Vezon squinted as he looked at a cluster of clouds in the night sky.

“Looks like rain,” he said. Suddenly lighting streaked across the sky. The children jumped in fright and huddled together.

“I hate to be the one to say this,” said Spiriah, “But lighting typically strikes tall objects that stick out from the ground.”

“Shut up,” said Roodaka. A heavy sheet of rain began to fall from the sky, pelting the four with raindrops. The wind howled noisily, causing the tree to rock back and forth.

“This is cool!” Vezon shouted, “It’s just like we’re on the mast of pirate ship in the middle of a storm!”

“SHUT UP!” screamed everyone else.

“I’m just trying to make light of the situation,” said Vezon.

Word Count: 1031

Edited by spyder ryder, Oct 22 2011 - 12:13 AM.

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 6
In which a rescue is made.


By morning, the foursome were miserably clinging to the branch of the tree. They were soaked, tired, and extremely uncomfortable from sleeping on the branch.

“My back hurts,” groaned Spiriah.

“My front hurts,” said Nocturn.

“I hate this tree,” muttered Roodaka, “I hate it.” Vezon, however, had somehow remained cheerful through the ordeal. Currently he was watching the sunrise and smiling broadly.

“Look at that!” he said as he pointed to the golden orb as it rose into the sky, “I’ve never seen a sunrise like that before. We should do this more often!”

“Shut up,” said Spiriah, “Or we’ll throw you out of the tree.”

“Well excuse me for loving nature,” said Vezon. He suddenly perked up.

“Hey look! Someone’s pulling into the parking lot!” Everyone was immediately looking at the paved area next to the school, watching an old beat-up station wagon pull into the parking lot.

“HELP!” shouted Spiriah.

“We’re up here!” cried Roodaka. The station wagon parked, and the little Ga-Turaga stepped out.

“HEY! OVER HERE!” shouted Vezon. The Ga-Turaga looked up to see the pitiful creatures looking at her with pleading eyes. She suddenly broke into long peals of laughter. She continued until she went inside the building, where they could still hear her chuckling. Discouraged, the four slumped down on the branch.

“This isn’t fair!” whined Roodaka, “My parents are probably worried sick about where I am, and nobody wants to help us!”

“To be honest, we’ve never really given them much reason to,” said Vezon. His comrades gave him a sideways glance.

“What do you mean?” asked Spiriah.

“Well, we’ve kind of been mean to a lot of people, haven’t we?” said Vezon.

“Well duh,” said Roodaka, “It’s fun.”

“We’ve always laughed at others who have problems,” continued the Skakdi, “And now in turn they’re laughing at our problem.”

“What are you getting at?” asked Nocturn. Vezon sighed.

“I just know there’s a correlation between the two facts, but I can’t figure it out.” Suddenly a familiar voice rang out.

“Vezon? Is that you up there?” The four members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club looked down to see Ms. Helryx standing below the tree.

“MS. HELRYX!” shouted Vezon, “We’re stuck up here!” Ms. Helryx’s mouth dropped open.

“How long have you been up there?”

“All night,” Spiriah said miserably.

“Mata Nui!” cried Ms. Herlyx, “I’ll get the Principal!” She ran off to the school while the four waited.

“What do you think the Principal’s gonna do?” asked Spiriah.

“I dunno,” Vezon said as he shrugged, “Maybe he’ll paddle the tree until it lets us down.”

“That’s stupid,” said Nocturn, “He’s obviously going to give it detention.”

“You’re all wrong, as usual,” said Roodaka, “He’s going to call my daddy, and he’ll sue the tree!”


In actual fact, all four of them were wrong. Principal Artahka called the fire department, and they arrived shortly afterward. Many firefighters were shaking there heads about how kids these days don’t know how to do anything by themselves. As it turned out a good many recognized Vezon, who had a habit of getting himself stuck in unusual places. After the four were taken out of the tree, they were immediately taken home. Roodaka’s parents had been searching the city for her, and once they got her back they bought her an entire city of dollhouses.



The next day after school, Spiriah made his way to the clubhouse. Under his arm he clutched several scrolls of paper, which he handled with care. He knocked on the door of the rundown shack, and Vezon’s voice came from the other side.

“Password,” he said.

“Jingle Bells, Artahka smells,” replied Spiriah. The door opened, and Spiriah stepped inside. The rest of the gang was already there waiting for him.

“Alright,” said Spiriah as he laid the scrolls on the crate, “The oak tree incident made me realize something. We need a new base at the other end of town.” Roodaka raised an eyebrow.

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m going to tell you,” answered Spiriah as he unrolled the scrolls. Sketched on the papers were drawings of what looked like an elaborate tree-house. The Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club clustered around them and looked at the diagrams with eager eyes.

“From the way I see it, we’ve got a pretty nice clubhouse here,” explained Spiriah, “But our mortal enemies, the Super-Mega-Awesome-Team have not one, but three clubhouses, scattered among the city.”

“So you’re proposing that we expand our criminal empire by situating more bases around Metru Nui,” said Roodaka. She gave the little smile she made when she was thinking something devious. “I like this idea.”

“This is gonna be so cool!” said Vezon, “We’re gonna have a tree-house! Now I can launch aerial attacks.”

“So where we building it?” asked Nocturn. Spiriah pulled a map out of his pocket and pointed to a location near Le-Metru.

“Somewhere near here,” said Spiriah, “I’ve already found the perfect tree to build it in. The only problem I have is finding some tools and supplies.”

“My dad has some,” said Vezon, “Come on, let’s go get ’em.”

Word Count: 847

Edited by spyder ryder, Oct 19 2011 - 05:33 PM.

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 7
In which we are introduced to Vezon's parents


Vezon’s house was rather small and rustic looking. Not that it was by any means a dump, but it wasn’t exactly tidy. As the four children walked up to it, they were able to hear two voices screaming obscenity at the top of their lungs. Everyone except Vezon slowed down and looked nervously at the house.

“Come on guys,” said Vezon, “That’s just my parents. They do this every day.”

“They do?” asked Spiriah.

“Yeah. They’re watching TV. They have this weird habit of yelling at the people on the screen. Hey, I think my mom just made dinner. Why don’t you guys come and eat with us?”

“I’m worried about getting eaten,” muttered Roodaka. Vezon rolled his eyes and threw his arms up in the air.

“So that one stupid kid goes missing on my dad’s property, and everyone naturally assumes we ate him. Come on, you don’t really think we did that, do you?” No one answered. “Come on, just come over and meet them. They’re awesome.” Again, there was silence. “Alright, if you don’t come over, I’m not getting the tools we need.” Spiriah went against the nagging doubt in his mind and spoke up.

“Alright, alright, we’ll stay for dinner.” Roodaka shot him one of her angry looks, but said nothing.


The inside of Vezon’s house was unimpressive, but not quite that bad. Even so, Roodaka sneered in disgust. As they walked through the door, they spotted Vezon’s parents. They were sitting on the couch and screaming at the television. Immediately Vezon’s friends shrank back in fear.

Vezon’s father, Irnakk, was gigantic and muscular, and had a huge golden-spined head. He was without at doubt the most terrifying person to ever live in Metru-Nui. His wife sat next to him. By Skakdi standards, she was beautiful. This meant that she was the biggest, strongest, most vicious creature imaginable. Unlike her bulky husband she was somewhat lean, but other than that she was not really that feminine.

“Hi Mom! Hi Dad!” said Vezon, “Look who I brought for dinner!” Roodaka, Nocturn and Spiriah shuddered. Vezon’s parents looked them over.

“These the little whelps you hang around with?” his father said in his thunderous voice, sounding very unimpressed.

“Yep,” said Vezon. His parents continued to look at the three with scrutinizing eyes.

“Well it’s a good thing you dropped by,” Vezon’s mother said, “You all look starved to death. Especially you,” she said as she pointed a finger at Roodaka, “You’re skin-and-bones!” Roodaka looked offended, but said nothing. Vezon’s parents got up from the couch.

“Come on in the kitchen,” said Vezon’s mother, “Dinner’s on the stove.” As they left the room, Spiriah muttered something to Vezon.

“She leaves the stove cooking unattended?” Vezon turned and gave him an odd look.

“Doesn’t everybody’s mom do that?” Everyone shook there heads. Irnakk suddenly bellowed up the stairway.

“VEZOK!” he cried, “DINNER’S READY!” A tough-looking Skakdi of Vezon’s age came running down the stairs. All the children recognized him as Vezon’s brother, who was part of the Six-Skakdi-Gang. They had another name for their organization, but were
not allowed to use it because it was a very bad word. The blue being stopped on his way to the table to look at Vezon and his friends.

“Hey guys,” he said, “Thanks again for letting Vezon into your club.” Although the Six-Skakdi-Gang and the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club were rivals, they couldn’t stop thanking them for allowing Vezon into their club. He had once been part of their own, and had been killing their image. Everyone walked into the dining room. Once again, it wasn’t elegant, but not too shabby either. They sat down at a large table. Vezon’s mother tossed some paper plates, napkins, and plastic sporks onto the table.

“You kids want some soda?” asked Irnakk. They nodded their heads quietly. “Well too bad! If you want soda, go to a restaurant!” Irnakk let out a hearty laugh. At that moment Vezon’s mother set down a large bubbling pot on the table. She opened the lid to reveal a brownish substance that was somewhere between a liquid and a solid.

“Dig in,” she said. Although they were disgusted by it, the children did as they were told. The four members of Vezon’s family were the only ones who ate it without hesitation. Spiriah, Nocturn, and Roodaka slowly began to shovel little spoonfuls of food into their mouths. They somehow managed to resist the instinct to gag.

“What is this, Ma?” asked Vezok. His mother shrugged.
“I dunno,” she said, “Something Fenrakk brought home. I couldn’t tell what it was.” Spiriah, Roodaka, and Nocturn froze mid-chew.

“So what you kids learn in school today?” asked Irnakk.

“Not a lot,” said Vezon, “We have to go back again tomorrow.”

Word Count: 795

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 8
In which there is a brief yet horrifying ordeal.


After the horrifying ordeal of eating dinner with Vezon’s family, the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club managed to slip out of the house unnoticed.

“My stomach hurts,” muttered Roodaka, “Your mother’s a terrible cook.”

“Oh really? Your mother can’t cook at all!” retorted Vezon.

“Okay, that’s enough,” said Spiriah, “Let’s get the tools.” Vezon lead them to the adjoining garage by his house, and opened the back door. Inside it smelled of wood shavings and motor oil. Vezon led them through the stacks of clutter to the area where his father kept his tools.

“Here they are,” he said as he pulled a rusty toolbox out from underneath a sawhorse. He forced open the lid and showed his friends what lay inside. Irnakk’s tools had been passed down from his grandfather, so it was no surprise that they were little more than stone hand-axes.

“Is this it?” Roodaka asked.

“What?” Vezon said, sounding slightly offended.

“There aren’t any power tools,” Roodaka said as she gave Vezon a glare, “How are you three supposed to build a tree-house if there aren’t any power tools?”

“Us three?” Spiriah said, “You have to help too!”

“And risk getting injured?” Roodaka said contemptibly, “I think not!” Roodaka then directed her anger at Vezon. “Are you telling me we had to sit through that atrocious dinner for some stupid rocks?”

“They’re not stupid,” Vezon said defensibly. “And…and…” Vezon’s eyes grew large with fear, and he smiled weakly. “Hi Dad.” His three companions turned around stiffly to see the two ogre-like beings that were Vezon’s parents.

“What are you doing with my tools?!” bellowed Irnakk, “I told you never to touch them!”

“Atrocious?!” Vezon’s mother screeched in Roodaka‘s face, “Atrocious?! I’ll show you atrocious, you skinny little brat!” Roodaka squealed like a stuck pig as the monstrous Skakdi wrapped her claws around her pigtails and dragged her back into the house. Her three comrades watched in horror. Then the angry voice of Irnakk disrupted their thoughts.

“Clean up this garage,” he ordered.

“Where do we put the garbage?” squeaked Spiriah.

“THERE IS NO GARBAGE!” yelled Irnakk. Not wasting a moment’s time, the three terrified youngsters got to work. But because they were not allowed to throw any of the obvious garbage away, the task looked to be impossible. There was absolutely no way to clear the floor with everything still inside.

“We can’t do this,” Spiriah whispered to Vezon as he pushed a damp cardboard box into the corner.

“I know,” replied Vezon, “He does this a lot. Just keep working, and he’ll eventually say you’re done.”

“Do you think we’ll ever see Roodaka again?” Nocturn muttered nervously.

“Of course,” answered Vezon, “You guys still don’t believe that story about that kid, right?” His only response was a pair of blank stares. “Oh come on! I know my parents! They may be terrifying, but they’re not that terrifying!”


As miserable as the three boys might have been, they were nowhere near as miserable as Roodaka. She stood over a sink, dunking dishes in greasy, soapy water. Vezon’s mother stood nearby, overseeing her work.

“Redo that dish!” said the Skakdi.

“I don’t wanna!” sobbed Roodaka. Vezon’s mother shot her a look that would have frightened Teridax himself into submission. Roodaka sighed and began to rewash the dish. It was fortunate that it was her last dish to clean.

“There’s one more thing I need you to help me with,” said the Skakdi.

“I thought you said you’d let me go if I did the dishes!” Roodaka whined. She turned around and froze. Vezon’s mother was setting the oven to preheat. The Vortixx’s eyes grew large and fearful.

“What are you doing?” she asked in a hushed tone. Vezon’s mother turned around and gave a dark smile.

“Making dessert.”


“Alright, alright,” grunted Irnakk, “That’ll do.” Vezon and the others gave a sigh of relief. After forty-five minutes straight of doing nothing but moving heavy boxes around, they were dead tired.

“Thank goodness,” said Spiriah. He turned around to leave, but felt Irnakk’s massive hand clamp down on his shoulder.

“Where do you think you’re goin’?” he asked, “You gotta stay for dessert!”

“D-dessert?” Spiriah asked nervously.

“Yeah,” said Irnakk, “Dessert.” Vezon’s grin grew huge.

“Ma made dessert?!” he hollered, “OH BOY!” He rushed into the house, followed by his reluctant friends. Inside on the kitchen table was a large plate of brownies, fresh from the oven. Spiriah had to admit they looked very tasty even if Vezon’s mother made them.

“Well what are you going to do, sit there and stare at it? Dig in!” said Irnakk. Vezon happily took one from the top of the pile and stuck in his mouth. Spiriah gingerly reached out and did the same. As he bit into it, he realized that it was one of the most delicious things he had ever eaten.

“Wow Ma, these sure are good,” said Vezon. He looked around the room, and paused.

“Where’s Roodaka?”

“Dunno,” grunted his mother, “She was here a minute ago.” Overhearing this comment, Spiriah was broken out of his state of bliss and looked around the room. Then as he chewed once again, he bit down on something hard. When no one was looking, he spat it out. When he saw what it was he nearly screamed out loud. Instead he shuffled unsteadily over to Vezon.

“Vezon…” he muttered blankly.

“Yeah?” Vezon answered through a mouthful of brownie.

“I found this in the brownies.” Spiriah showed him the little object he had found in his mouth. Vezon glanced at it unimpressed and went back to eating his brownie. Then his eyes got very wide and he looked up again. He slowly turned his head to look back at Spiriah.

“Is that…” his voice trailed off in a hoarse whisper. Spiriah nodded. Both children were utterly terrified.

Because the object was a button from Roodaka’s shirt.

“Uh…Ma,” Vezon said skittishly, “What did you put in these brownies?”

“The same as I always do,” she said affectionately, “Chocolate and love.”

“You didn’t…put anything else in, did you?”

“Well now that you mention it,” said the Skakdi, “I did add a little something extra.”

“Like what?” asked Vezon. His mother gave him a nefarious grin.

“I thought I’d try adding a Vortixx this time.” She took a big bite of a brownie. Vezon, Spiriah, and Nocturn screamed. They opened up their mouths and spat out the delicious brownies, and scraped any remaining crumbs off of their tongues. Vezon’s parents started laughing.

“Boy, you kids are easy to scare,” Irnakk guffawed as he turned to his wife, “Why don’t you let her out now?”

“Of course,” said Vezon’s mother. She opened the door to the cabinet that lay beneath the kitchen sink. “Alright, fun’s over, you can get out now.” Roodaka scurried out of the cabinet and hid behind her friends.

“You should’ve seen the looks on your faces,” Irnakk said.

“Uh…yeah…Good one, Dad,” Vezon said as he smiled weakly. “Hey uh, we kind of have to go do something now.”

“Yeah, sure, whatever!” said his mother as she wiped the tears from her eyes. The four members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club turned and hightailed it out of the house, leaving the two goons to their laughter.


“Your mother is insane!” Roodaka screamed at Vezon, “She dared to take a button off of my shirt and made me hide under that stupid sink!”

“By the way,” Spiriah said, “Here.” He handed the button to the angry Vortixx. She looked at it and sneered at the Makuta.

“You got teeth marks on it!” she cried angrily as she slapped him.

“Now guys,” Vezon said nervously as he held out his arms, “I’m sure they didn’t mean to be horrible. Let’s just forget about this whole thing and move on. Okay?” Three furious faces were his only response.


Principal Artahka was driving home from work when he saw three students of his school running down the sidewalk. Roodaka, Spiriah, and Nocturn appeared to be chasing Vezon and throwing an assortment of small rocks and sticks at him.

Word Count: 1345

Edited by spyder ryder, Oct 21 2011 - 10:05 PM.

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 9
In which Ms. Helryx is trolled.


“Alright class, did everyone do their homework last night?” asked Ms. Helryx. Most of the class raised their hands. As usual, the four members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club did not. Ms. Helryx sighed and turned to the blackboard.

“Who has the answer to problem one?” she said as she wrote 3 X 3 on the board. Gali raised her hand. Ms. Helryx smiled a little. Gali showed much promise in academics. “Yes, Gali?” the teacher said as she pointed to the little blue Toa.

“The answer is nine,” said Gali.

“Very good,” said Ms. Helryx, “Three times three is nine.” The Toa suddenly winced as she heard a familiar voice from the back.

“Hold on a minute,” it said, “I have a question.” Ms. Helryx turned around and sighed.

“Vezon, you have to raise your hand first.” The little Skakdi promptly raised his hand and spoke again.

“How can we be sure that three times three equals nine?” Ms. Helryx looked at him oddly.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“Can we actually prove that three times three is nine?” asked Vezon.

“Yes,” said the teacher, “Let’s say you have three baseballs. If you had three times that amount, you would have nine.”

“Where would we get the baseballs from?” asked Vezon, “I mean, how would we get nine from three?”

“I just explained that,” Ms. Helryx sighed in exasperation.

“Well you logically can’t get nine baseballs from three,” added Spiriah, “It’s impossible.”

“More importantly,” said Vezon, “Where would you get enough fields and players to use them?”

“Look, let’s just start over,” said Ms. Helryx, “Nine times nine-”

“I thought it was three times three?” Roodaka quipped.

“Yes, thank you,” said the teacher, “Three times three equals nine.”

“But why do we need three times three to equal nine?” said Vezon, “Why not just start out with nine? It’d be much simpler.”

“And another thing,” said Spiriah, “Since you brought up the subject of three baseballs, what does the three in the problem stand for? Is it three baseballs times three basket balls?”

“No, the threes are just threes,” said Ms. Helryx, who was by now starting to look a little bit addled.

“But there has to be three somethings,” said Roodaka, “Otherwise it would be zero.”

“The threes are just regular numbers!” cried Ms. Helryx.

“So we’re supposed to believe that a number, which does not actually stand for anything and is therefore hypothetical, times another hypothetical number, equals another hypothetical number?” asked Spiriah. A murmur of discord went through the entire classroom.

“What he say?” Lewa whispered to Gali.

“He says that we’re basically doing nothing,” she answered.

“He’s right, whatever he just said!” cried Tahu, “I’m not doing my homework no more!” Several other students cheered in agreement and threw their textbooks to the floor.

“Calm down everyone!” cried Ms. Helryx as she clanged the cowbell on her desk. However, what had been set in motion couldn’t be stopped. The students had arisen from their desks and went to mingle with each other as they would do in recess. Towards the back of the room, the members of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club grinned.


“We’re geniuses,” Spiriah beamed as the four walked home from school.

“I know,” Roodaka said, although she really thought that she was more of a genius and that the others were merely her lackeys.

“So what about that tree-idea?” Nocturn asked.

“I’ve been going over it,” said Spiriah, “And I’ve come to the conclusion that if we really are going to go through with it, we should probably do it as soon as possible.” At that moment, all four of the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club turned their heads around as they heard the familiar jingle of the ice-cream truck.

Word count: 620

[Frezon]

pretyy good comedy here. here's my favorite two lines

"Why should I do that?" Roodaka said sulkily, "What have you ever done for me?"

"We prevented you from committing homicide today," answered Spiriah.

"Wow!" he exclaimed, "I did not know a spine could bend that way!"

keep it up. i'll keep my eye on this one.

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 10
In which Vezon encounters a sewer-dwelling reptile


Coming down the street was the large white vehicle that belonged to Sam the Ice-Cream Man. He was well known throughout Metru-Nui for making the single most delicious ice-cream that ever existed in the universe. He had come about it entirely by accident, and his ice-cream truck was the only place it could be found. It was said to taste like a mixture of every chocolate dessert ever made, and was simply known as the flavor ‘Deluxe’. It just so happened that the Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club were absolutely addicted to Deluxe-flavored ice-cream. They stared longingly at the truck as it drove down the street. It slowed down as it came to them. The window in the drivers seat rolled down, revealing the gangly Ko-Toa that was Sam.

“Howdy kids,” he said, “How are you today?”

“We’re fine,” said Spiriah. It took all of his willpower to respond. His mind was so focused on the ice-cream that he could barely think of anything else.

“You kids want some ice-cream?” asked Sam.

“YES!” screeched Roodaka as she leapt at the truck. She took the hundred dollar bill from her pocket and waved it enthusiastically in Sam’s confused face.

“I’LL TAKE ALL THE DELUXE-FLAVORED ICE-CREAM YOU HAVE!” she shouted. Sam took the money from her hand and looked it over.

“Well golly-gee-whilikers kids, I’d sure be grateful for this, but I don’t think I can make change for this.” The four children watched in stunned silence as he handed the dollar back to Roodaka. “I’ll be down in the town square later,” he said as he drove away. As soon as he drove around the corner, Roodaka suddenly whipped around and looked at her comrades with such determination that it frightened them.

“Alright,” she said as she put her hands on her hips, “We’re gonna get that ice-cream if it’s the last thing we do!”


Vezon looked down at the grate in the sidewalk. Beneath it was the sort of darkness one only sees in one’s nightmares. It was as if there was no light at all. All manner of grotesque, slithering things could have lived below the streets of Metru-Nui.

“Why do I have to go down there?” he asked his companions.

“Because,” Roodaka answered instantly, “You’re the smallest.”

“Well I know why I’m going down,” said Vezon, “But I’m wondering why I have to go down at all.”

“Because there are probably millions of quarters down there,” Roodaka replied in a contemptible huff, “Here’s the flashlight.” The Vortixx turned to Nocturn. “Nocturn?” The four-armed fish being reached down and lifted the heavy iron grate from the sidewalk as Spiriah tied a rope around Vezon. The Skakdi walked over to the edge of the rectangular hole, and stared down into it.

“I’ve changed my mind,” he said as he began to turn around. Roodaka rolled her eyes and casually pushed him in. He cried out as he fell, but it was cut short as he splashed into shallow, garbage-filled water.

“You okay?” Spiriah called down.

“…I think so…” came an echoing reply. Roodaka knelt down the edge of the hole and spoke to Vezon.

“Do you see any quarters?” she said.

“I can’t see anything,” replied Vezon. Roodaka once again rolled her eyes.

“Use the flashlight, stupid!”

“I can’t,” Vezon said defensively, “There aren’t any batteies in it! Can I come back up now?”

“Absolutely not!” snapped Roodaka, “Use your hands to feel around the bottom!” A weary sigh came from deep within the storm drain. Several splashes followed. Finally Vezon spoke once more.

“I found one!” he cried triumphantly, “Can I come up now?”

“Keep looking,” barked Roodaka, “There’s got to be more down there. You’re just not trying hard enough!” Several more minutes passed as Vezon continued to search. Suddenly he let out a scream.

“PULL ME UP! PULL ME UP NOW!” he shrieked. Before Roodaka could stop them, Spiriah and Nocturn began hoisting the Skakdi up. All three children stared wide-eyed as Vezon was brought back out of the hole. Holding a death-clamp on the seat of his pants was the biggest alligator they had ever seen.

“GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!” screamed Vezon. Nocturn and Spiriah began to throw punches at the leathery beast, until it finally released Vezon from its jaws and retreated back down into the sewer. The Skakdi scrambled away from the storm drain, picked up the grate with adreniline fueled strength, and slamed it down back over the hole. He was hyperventilating and shaking with fright.

“Gimme the quarter!” Roodaka demanded as she held out her hand. Not saying a word, Vezon dropped the coin into the Vortixx’s hand. It was covered in dirt and slightly oxidized, causing Roodaka’s face to screw up with disgust.

“On second thought, you can buy it.”


Word Count: 797

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 11
In which 3/4ths of the team is tricked.


True to his word, The Ultra-Super-Secret-Evildoers-Club found Sam in the town square. His truck was surrounded by dozens of children, all waiting to spend their allowances on the ice-cream. Roodaka started pushing her way through the crowd, dragging Vezon and the others behind her.

“Out of my way, losers!” she said. As they neared the van, She nudged Vezon ahead of her. “Listen, I want a triple scoop cone of Deluxe-flavored Ice-cream, with hot fudge, whipped cream, a cherry on top, and sprinkles.” The Vortixx edged her face closer to Vezon in an intimidating manner. “You got that?” The Skakdi nodded and went over to Sam. The Ko-Toa’s face brightened as he saw Vezon.

“Well howdy there,” he said cheerfully, “What can I get for you?” Vezon looked behind him to see Roodaka staring intently at him. He turned around and nervously spoke.

“I’ll have a triple scoop cone of Deluxe-flavored Ice-cream with hot fudge, whipped cream, and a cherry on top.” He handed the quarter to Sam.

“Is that all?” asked the Toa. Vezon nodded. Sam disappeared into the truck for a minute, and then reemerged with Vezon’s order. The little Skakdi gingerly took it, thanked Sam, and turned around. Right behind him was Roodaka.

“Gimme,” she cried as she snatched it away from him. She was about to eat it when she suddenly looked at it with shock and disgust.

“Where are the sprinkles?!” she shrieked angrily, “I told you to get the sprinkles! You bumbling moron!” She slapped Vezon several times over the head. However, Vezon smiled slightly.

“Does that mean I can have it?” he asked modestly.

“You don’t deserve it!” Roodaka sneered venomously. And with that, she threw the ice-cream cone to the ground. Vezon’s eyes began to tear up as he saw the irresistible Ice-cream fall into the dirt, lamenting over the waste of such good food. But he was only able to be sorrowful for a moment, because Roodaka started dragging him back to Spiriah and Nocturn.

“He forgot the sprinkles!” she cried aloud once more, “I can’t eat it without sprinkles!”

“Hey, what about us?” Spiriah asked. Roodaka gave him a glare that would have stopped Teridax dead in his tracks.

“What about you?” she said darkly. Spiriah smiled weakly.

“Nothing. Nothing at all.” She continued to leer at him, and Spiriah could feel her fiery gaze boring into his soul.

“Good,” she said quietly, “Now, there’s only one logical thing left to do. We’ve got to steal the ice-cream truck.” Her three companions looked at her in shock.

“Steal the truck?” sputtered Nocturn, “Are you out of your mind?”

“You can’t steal from Sam,” cried Spiriah, “He’s the only one in town who hasn’t banned us from his premises!”

“Are you telling me what to do?” Roodaka said as she stood over Spiriah, looking down with her poisonous eyes. Her three comrades felt themselves wilting under her hateful, icy stare. “I asked you a question, Spiriah. Are you telling me what to do?” The Makuta shook his head slowly. Roodaka stepped back slightly. “Good. Now then, Sam will be driving down Elm Street at four o’clock. We will be there waiting.”

“What are we going to do?” Nocturn asked, his voice quavering with fear. The small, nefarious smile appeared on Roodaka’s face.

“Whatever it takes,” she replied.



“We have to do what?!” Spiriah and Nocturn asked as their eyes bugged out of their skulls.

“You heard me,” said Roodaka, “Get up in that tree and drop the rock onto his windshield as he goes by.”

“But he might get hurt!” said Vezon, “We can’t hurt Sam!” Roodaka slammed her foot down on Vezon’s, and the small Skakdi started jumping around and howling in pain.

“Anyone else want to question me?” Roodaka asked. Spiriah and Nocturn shook their heads and sighed as they started climbing the large elm tree. The branches hung over the street, and it was there job to climb up into them and drop a large rock onto Sam’s truck. It was Vezon and Roodaka’s job to stand on the sidewalk and flag Sam down so they would be able to drop it precisely on his windshield. Nobody but Roodaka wanted to through with this plan, but they were all terrified to death of her. In a matter of moments everyone was in their places. Spiriah and Nocturn were precariously perched up in the tallest branch of the tree, while Vezon and Roodaka stood on the sidewalk. A few minutes later, Sam’s truck came down the street.

“Hello!” Roodaka called as she donned a sweet little smile, “Mr. Sam!” The ice-cream truck started slowing down. Suddenly, Spiriah and Nocturn fell out of the tree, and landed on top of each other. Seconds later came the rock, which landed on both of them. Several loud crunches sounded out.

“MY LEG!” cried Nocturn as he clutched his shin.

“MY WING!” called out Spiriah as the damaged limb fluttered uselessly. Sam immediately jumped out of the truck and ran over to the two.

“Golly gee, that was quite a fall,” he said, “Are you boys alright?” The two broken figures of Spiriah and Nocturn tried pitifully to stand up. Before either of them could speak, Roodaka stepped in.

“Oh my gosh!” she cried, “What were you two doing?” She turned to Sam with false concern in her eyes. “You’d better go call 9-1-1!”

“Okay,” said Sam, “Where’s the nearest phone?”

“There’s a payphone down at the town square,” answered Roodaka, “You’ll have to run quickly! We’ll stay here and guard the truck!”

“Alright,” said Sam, who if you hadn’t guessed by now was not exactly the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree, “I’ll be right back!” He turned to address the two injured youngsters. “I’ll be back in a jiffy. Help yourselves to any ice-cream!”

“Oh, we will,” Roodaka said as she grinned her evil smile. Sam took off running to the town square. Her three companions looked at her in awe.

“You really can turn the situation around,” said Vezon.

“I know,” said Roodaka as she crawled into the back of the truck. Vezon went to help the others when he heard the little door in back slam shut. Immediately all three youngsters stood up straight, even Spiriah and Nocturn, whose bodies were bent slightly out of shape. They rushed over to the little door in back, and tried turning the handle. It was locked.

“Roodaka,” Vezon said, his eyes wide and fearful, “Uh…could you please unlock the door?”

“Nope,” was the giddy reply. The fear and shock of the three boys suddenly turned into anger and disbelief. They started screaming profanity and pounding the side of the truck, but even Nocturn’s mighty strength was unable to break through.


Roodaka laughed with wicked glee as she dragged the five gallon bucket of Deluxe-flavored Ice-cream from the rest of the buckets. Her eyes glittered with greed as she tore off the lid.

“It’s mine, all mine!” she cackled as she took several condiments from the serving counter. On top of the bucket she poured hot fudge, whipped cream, a cherry, and lots and lots of sprinkles. Then, using a plastic spoon, she took a big bite.

Word Count: 1204

[spyder ryder]

Chapter 12
In which Roodaka gets her just desserts.



“Please tell us, will our little girl be all right?” Roodaka’s mother asked with large, concerned eyes. Her husband stood next to her, outside of their daughter’s bedroom.

“It’s a distinct case of over-eating. I‘ve never heard of anyone eating five gallons of ice-cream in one sitting,” said Doctor Dume as he put his stethoscope in his bag, “She’ll be better in a few days. Until then, I’d have her stay away from anymore ice-cream.”


Roodaka lay in her bed, more miserable than she could ever recall being, and feeling very sorry for herself. Her face was dreadfully pale, and she looked somewhat like a python that had swallowed a pig. The worst part about her condition was that she was too sick to even complain about it. When she was ill she normally griped to her parents almost constantly. All she could really do now was lay with the blanket over her head and try to fall asleep. She almost managed it when she heard a knock at the the door. She peeked out from under the blankets to see her mother in the doorway. She had a cheery smile on her normally glum face.

“Roodaka,” she said, “Your friends are here to visit you, and they even brought a gift!” Roodaka’s eyes widened as she saw her three comrades standing behind her mother. Spiriah had his wing in a splint, and Nocturn was on crutches. Vezon had caught a cold from being down in the storm drain, and was snuffling like a steam train. In his hand he clutched a brown grocery bag. All three of them looked extremely angry with her.

“I’ll just let the four of you play up here,” Roodaka’s mother said as she went back down stairs. Roodaka shrank into her bed. Nocturn used his crutch to push the door shut. Vezon reached over and locked it. All the while they glared at her with furious eyes. Without speaking they hobbled over to her bed, and surrounded her. Roodaka was too sick to do anything about it, and was absolutely terrified of whatever they were planning. She began to sweat profusely, and her body trembled. Vezon reached into the bag and pulled something out. Roodaka’s face became a portrait of silent horror. In Vezon’s left hand was a triple scoop cone of Deluxe-flavored ice-cream, with hot fudge, whipped cream, a cherry on top, and sprinkles. In his right hand was a plastic spoon. Roodaka wanted to scream, but she was so sick that all she could do was utter a hoarse whisper.

“No…no…no!” she whimpered pitifully as Vezon took a scoop of the ice-cream and moved it to her mouth. He grinned wickedly and said something that made her blood run cold.

“This time we didn’t forget the sprinkles.”


Mrs. Equine looked up to see the three injured children walking down the stairs with disappointed looks on their faces.

“She didn’t explode,” Nocturn grumbled, “I wanted to see her explode.”

“I don’t understand it,” Spiriah said defensively, “I was certain we had more than enough ice-cream.”

“I shoulda punched her in the gut,” muttered Nocturn, “Then she would’ve exploded.”

“I kind of glad she didn’t,” said Vezon, “Gastric juices stain horribly and are incredibly hard to get out of carpets.”

“Leaving so soon?” asked Mrs. Equine.

“Huh?” said Spiriah as he looked up, “Oh yeah. She didn’t want to play because she didn’t feel good. We gotta go now.” The three youngsters started for the door. Mrs. Equine went up the stairs to her daughter’s bedroom.

“Roodaka?” she called as she opened the door. The only response was a sickly wheezing noise. Worried, Mrs. Equine rushed inside to make sure everything was alright. Roodaka was staring at the ceiling with a blank, traumatized look in her eyes. There was a trickle of hot fudge running down her chin.

“Roodaka!” Mrs. Equine said as she put her hands on her hips, “Have you been eating ice-cream?” A gurgle came from the bedridden Vortixx.

“Roodaka? Roodaka?”

“Bllleeeeauuuggggghhhhh!”

Word Count: 671

Edited by spyder ryder, Oct 28 2011 - 12:02 PM.