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Protohuman

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  1. Protohuman
    As many of you know, there are homosexual banners going round at the moment. And a lot of you people have a problem with it. But some people stood up for them...
     
    These people are a little thing called 'open minded'. D'you know why? Because gayness isn't wrong. I'm a bisexual, and I'm proud of it. Yeah, I've had boyfriends, and they were all awesome people!
     
    It's a natural thing for God's sake! Those intensely religous people are condemning a group of people for being themselves! Now, I don't often get angry over the internet, because it is pointless; but when so many people are against a part of me for no real reason, I just feel so much rage at them. Can you blame me for that? No.
     
    I think that if your God condemns people for such a harmless and totally natural way of being, then I don't want to follow him. I was on the BNG chatbox the other day, and talking to two members. We were talking about the gay picture fad on BZP, and they just went mental! They said it's 'sickening' and 'offensive'. Do you wanna know what I find offensive? Prejudice!
     
    And when I heard them say that, my stomach just turned. I felt so alone, and it was just making me sad. I was so offended that I asked to be banned for a week.
     
    Now let me ask you this, homophobes:
    Why is gayness wrong? Give me a proper and logical reason.
     
    That's my thoughts on this fad.
     
    P.S. Is there any kind of petition to allow the banners?
  2. Protohuman
    Welcome to my first BIONICLE comic strip!:

    MAKUTA LIFE!

    This comic depicts the lives of the Brotherhood of Makuta, as they tackle their every day goals;

    Whether they be solving personal problems, or trying to succeed in business.

    Character Collage

    The Strips:
    #1

    Drawn on Microsoft Paint, inspired by Dave Reddicks 'Trek Life'.

    I want to make this popular, so please, if you like it make a banner or advertise in your sig

    I also intend to post this on Kanohi Journal...


  3. Protohuman
    NOTICE: The thoughts expressed and characters in this document are fictitious and should not be taken seriously!
     
    Hi, I'm Protohuman. You may recognise me from other cooking places, such as 'Arthur Fiddlesworth's British Wine' or the more popular 'Harvey Wallbanger's Favorite Cheese'. Today I'm giving you (the audience) a lesson on creating the ultimate feast, with the help of the cult-followed Nero Spaggiloga. This fine powder is an old sentimental recipe from this lovely family I encountered in Italy.
     
    Yes, the Cappellettis were a fine bunch; The husband and father was a short, middle aged man. Old Benito was a wonderfully great family man, and nice enough to let me in on his families recipies. The wife and mother was a delightful woman, and great in the kitchen. She lived for the people around her, and never thought of herself; a fine example of a female. Together they had two lovely daughters and a son. The holder of the old, old recipe was the old, old granny of the family. She was rather lippy to me when I mentioned she was putting the wrong ingredients into her spag-bol; I mean, come on, since when did the sauce include fresh garlic, onion and beef mince? And then when I told her to go easy on the herbs, she had the nerve to say 'Perché non aiutare Benito in biblioteca'... whatever that means... A very scary woman she was...
     
    Anyway they were a great bunch, and fantastic friends; so therefore I arranged (by myself) to make their special recipies famous. Without telling them, although I'm sure they would be cool about the whole thing if they're watching this, I 'borrowed' their personal cookbook and took it back to England. Thanks to my team of researchers, I'll probably get pretty rich off this. But the Cappelletti family need not worry, I have them covered; I'm going to send the Christmas cards every year with pictures of my success, y'know, to keep the up to date. As for the money; I'll give a fair amount to the National Carehome for Donkeys.
     
    Now... The great feast...
     
    First you set up your tools; what you'll need:
     
    Pans
    Electric/gas Stove
    Any good mixing bowls
    Medium/Large sized basin
    Big huge bowl
     
    Ingredients:
    Eggs [3/4]
    Nero Spaggiloga [3 KG]
    Saffron [16 KG]
    Nutmeg [2 KG]
     
    Step 1:
    First you get a big heaping pack of Nero Spag' (hopefully available in shops soon (in the Middle East)) and pour a great big handful into your pan. Drench in olive oil.
     
    Step 2:
    Crack all your eggs over it, and mull things over.
     
    Step 3:
    Get Saffron. Lots and lots of Saffron.
     
    Step 4:
    Add a pinch of nutmeg (and by pinch, I mean 2 KG)
     
    Step 5:
    Your frying pan's probably overflowing now and dropping into the fire below, (did I mention to stove should be on low heat?). So that's when the basin comes in; assuming it's not stuck the the surface of the pan (in which case you must start over), slap the whole thing into it. Then stir (violently if necessary) for a good amount of time.
     
    Step 6:
    Assuming you have a rich creamy liquid, pour the mixture into the huge bowl on your table. Then divide it into the plates around, and in just a few hours, it will mature into...
     
    http://www.esquire.com/media/cm/esquire/im...ast-0808-lg.jpg
     
    Enjoy!
  4. Protohuman
    Sketch 1: Jim the Ninja
     
    JOHN: Hey, Jim, how's life on the Enterprise?
     
    JIM: It's pretty good, John, thanks!
     
    JOHN: (Holds in laughter)
     
    JIM:

     
     
     
    Sketch 2: Mr. Obvious
     
    NIEL ARMSTRONG: Hey, Buzz, where did you get your nickname from?
     
    BUZZ ALDERINE: I got it in the Airforce.
     
    NIEL: Why, because of the sound of the planes?
     
    BUZZ:

     
     
     
    Sketch 3: Tetchy Worf
     
    CAPTAIN PICARD: Mr. Worf, open hailing frequencies.
     
    WORF: There is no honour in that, sir.
     
    PICARD: (Scoffs) Everything's about honour these days, even the Romulans are more agreeable than you.
     
    WORF:

     
     
     
    Sketch 4: We Cool, G?
     
    (Charlie is on a plane when a flight attendent arrives)
     
    FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Can I get you anything, sir?
     
    CHARLIE: Err, yeah, could I have a dodo sandwich please?
     
    FLIGHT ATTENDANT:

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