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The review topic for my epic, The Legends of Atara Nui I suppose this is as good a place as any to explain this, so here goes: The general premise of this epic is essentially set on a heavily altered Mata Nui, with different Matoran elements, principles, environments and characters. Please, do tell me what you think.
The Legends of Atara Nui In the time before time, The Great Spirit Mata Nui descended from the heavens, bringing with him us, the ones called Matoran, to this paradise. The island of Atara Nui was our home among the waves, and in honor of the Great Spirit, we took his concepts of Unity, Duty and Destiny, and created the principles by which we lead our lives. The Su-Matoran, the artists of Atara Nui, conceived of the principle of Creativity In the midst of their production, the Fe-Matoran invented Malleability The Vo-Matoran, always hard at work on the high seas, applied the principle of Practicality The Ba-Matoran, to reflect their ways of thinking and contemplation, thought up the principle of Spirituality While they worked with their herbs and labored over their lumber, the Bo-Matoran created Brotherhood The De-Matoran, as they practiced their nomadic hunting lifestyle, took the principle of Honor to heart. But all is not well, for Atara Nui has many secrets hidden away from the Matoran, and strange forces are at work. Change is coming, but so is hope, legend tells that six Toa will band together to defeat these strange forces, and with Mata Nui’s help, restore paradise on Atara Nui. Welcome to Atara Nui, let’s hope you know how to keep secrets. Chapter 1: On the High seas As the ever so harsh waves of Paro Bay continued to wash against its rocky shores, with the booms of thunder sounding off in the distance, gradually growing stronger with each crack of the sky, the Vo-Matoran Virna was getting very, very frustrated. “Are you absolutely sure about this?” she asked, looking away from the oncoming stormclouds to regard her first mate. Her first mate nodded incessantly. “Yes, the storm is going to hit Vo-Koro. But they’re in the middle of their annual Bazaar, so they’ll probably be too busy to notice” Vo-Koro was the name given to the landlocked settlement of Vo-Matoran in Paro Bay. Virna herself had been there only a few times in her life, given that she and many of her kin were of the kind that spent almost their entire lives on the high seas around Atara Nui. “Is there anyone else around?” Virna asked. Deep down she knew the answer was no, but she’d gone out to gather food for one of the many water-bound fishing piers she lived on, and she had a reputation for always getting the job done to keep up. The dilemma was settled before it really got off the ground. “Heh” Virna mumbled as she took note of her using an expression like “off the ground”. She herself had hardly ever had the privilege of walking on solid ground, in a sense she was “off the ground” as well. Her first mate shook her head. Virna sighed and turned to take a look at the incoming stormclouds. She could almost swear she heard the thunder taunting her, as a foreboding omen of trials to come. “Wake up the crew” Virna ordered “we’re going to have to work fast if we’re going to reach Vo-Koro in time. The first mate nodded and went under deck. Soon, the sound of complaints competing with haphazard grunts of acknowledgement could be heard. One by one, the ladies of The Weeping Ruki came crawling up on deck, the last crew member hurriedly straightening her Kanohi as she exited the lower deck. “Alright, girls” Virna called to her gathered crew “there’s been a change of plans” Her gaze flicked across the crew, noting their confused faces and worried gazes at the distant stormclouds. “That storm is going to hit Vo-Koro, and it’s our job to get there and warn them in time” Virna said, projecting the statement with her usual flair of stern determination and fervor. Her crew gave a collective nod and a “Aye, Captain” in response. “Good, then get to work. Xarya; raise the anchor, Tyrell, Maya; get the sails ready, Rilvi…” she paused, the silence between the two broken by the sky cracking open yet again to release a rattling boom to pound their eardrums. Virna closed her eyes in defeat, and gave the order “Rilvi; throw the fish overboard” The look of confusion plastered across Rilvi’s Rode was almost comical, had this been a different situation, Virna might even have laughed. Not today, though. “All of it?” she asked, the question buzzing in Virna’s ears like a fly. Of course she meant all of it, the less the ship weighed, the faster it would go, and the fish was the only cargo they could afford to drop on such short notice. She didn’t use that tone when she spoke out loud. Instead, all that came from her mouth was a stern confirmation: “All of it” As the sun slowly receded below the skyline, the medium-sized fishing boat caught onto the eastward drift that was pushing the stormclouds, scuttling off in the direction of Paro Bay and Vo-Koro. Virna was at the helm, keeping the boat on a steady course as the wind pushed it forward. Occasionally she looked up, seeing the sky above her gradually grow murkier and foggier as the storm caught up to them. The first streams of gray vapor crept over the skyline like cold fingers reaching out after them. “This is going to be close” she called “Xarya; be prepared to make a run for it once we hit solid ground” “Will do” the Kakama-wearing sailor replied, running up to the bow of The Weeping Ruki to be ready for when they got within reach of Vo-Koro’s docks. “Land ho” Maya called from the lookout. She could see the myriad of lightstones that were clumped together under the full moon on the horizon. Virna could feel the wind starting to pick up, and the thunders, ever increasing in volume, where slowly interspersed with erratic flashes of light as lightning bolts joined the fray. A Lightning bolt tore apart the sky above them with a loud crack, as if the sky itself was breaking apart. “Everyone prepare for landing” Virna called, twisting the ship a little to the portside in order to align with the brig. It hadn’t taken two seconds before Xarya had jumped off and darted off in direction of the still ongoing festivities in Vo-Koro. The others remained and fastened the boat before Virna ordered them off, too. “Go, I’ll finish securing the ship” she shouted, trying to drown out the growing howl of the wind. Her crew looked like they were about to protest, but all Virna needed was a stern glare in their direction, and all such qualms seemed forgotten. They took off, leaving Virna on her own against the storm. “Sails first” she thought, clambering up the rope ladder, almost flapping in the strong wind, to loosen the large pieces of cloth. The ship was starting to rock, as larger and larger waves washed against the shore, forcing her to cling to the rope ladder like a Brakas Monkey to stolen goods, still she pressed on. A quick glance in the general vicinity of Vo-Koro showed Virna that the number of lightstones had dropped substantially; it seemed her crew had gotten the warning to them in time. She herself had just barely managed to finish with the sails, and she figured it would have to do; it was time to get to safety. The sky cracked open again, and a spear of white light was flung from the black void above and right at the foot of The Weeping Ruki’s main mast. Virna herself was knocked to the floor in cover of the shower of splinters that sprung forth from the point of impact. That was the least of her problems. The largest wave yet came closing in, rocking the ship back and forth like something being played with by the aforementioned Brakas Monkey’s ungrateful little spawns, and that was the last straw for the already ailing mast. The loud creak hit Virna’s ears with a dry prominence, as a contrast to all the wind and humidity around her, she looked up… And was abruptly pinned down by an enormous weight being thrown upon her person, she cried out in exasperated pain as the mast did unspeakable things to her back. Try as she might, she could not get loose, for all intents and purposes she was stuck there. It was a cruel irony (or was it, she wasn’t even sure what irony meant, she’d had no use for learning that). Her first priority had been getting everyone else to safety, and now she was the one in danger. The rain set in, tiny needles of cold and humidity showering upon her head, arms and feet. At least her injured back would remain dry, the thought made her snort. But then, to Virna’s shocking surprise, she felt a warm, fuzzy feeling spread through her body, it started in her stomach, and slowly spread from there, all the way from toes to fingertips. And as the feeling grew, she noticed that her sight had gotten a black tint around the edges, one that was growing as her eyelids begun to feel heavier and heavier. Her environment grew blurry, drifting in and out of focus as if she was underwater. She felt herself growing heavier, sinking to the seafloor, slowly, the blackness engulfing her mind. “Virna” a voice called to her from the deep, a melodic, soothing voice, its every word like poetry in her ears. “Come to me, come to me. You’ve earned your rest. It it’s time” “Yes, I’m coming” Virna replied, her voice sounding hollowed out and discarded. She heard a muffled voice call her name, and a light appeared above her, someone was calling for her, someone… a friend. “Please, Virna, wake up” the voice begged. It was unmistakably Rilvi’s voice calling to her. Always so sensitive, that one “You’ve done your part” the soothing voice from further down in the black depths called “you deserve to rest” “Virna, please” Rilvi’s voice continued to plead “we need you” Virna turned to look down in the black depths. “I am needed” she said simply, before she began swimming up towards the light. “Come now, Virna” the melodic voice persisted, putting more force behind its words. Such that Virna was overtaken with a near overwhelming need to join the beautiful voice in the depths below, but another plead from Rilvi turned her attention back to the light above again. “You have given enough, it’s time to join us” the voice said, that was when an alarm went off in Virna’s head. “No” she said “I still have plenty left to give. I have to go back, to do otherwise would be irresponsible” Virna turned again, and swam the last few strokes toward the light. As her entire field of vision turned white, she heard the melodic voice calling to her one last time, saying. “You’ll come eventually” And then everything went black. When Virna woke up, she saw her crew leaning over her, with a fifth face also present; Vo-Koro’s healer. “You took quite a nasty blow out there” she remarked. Virna sighed in response. “I was just trying to make sure the ship wouldn’t go up in splinters, I realize now that it was irresponsible of me” “Nobody’s perfect” Xarya interjected “but you were lucky we were there to get you out from under the mast.” “I guess so” Virna replied with a mild smile “Thank you” Review Topic