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Hello everybody, I have something new. Something bold. Something random. Including (but not limited to): Morgan Freeman, Majestic Unibrows, and Hand Grenades. The first few chapters will deal with introducing me and my friends' characters. Everything from then will be our mostly-made-up adventures. If you would like a cameo appearance, let me know. REVIEW TOPIC ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- <Terry> Terry awoke as he did every day. Get dressed, pretending to brush his teeth, and eating a hearty breakfast of cereal. He walked across his room and grabbed his dead phone, because a phone was better than no phone. He was going to charge it someday, just not today. He then proceeded to get ready for a long day of napping, playing with Lego, and target practice. Being a freelance mercenary was a hard life, which was why Terry lived in a cardboard box fort with optimal security. Leaching off of the next door restaurant was difficult without getting caught, so he routed it through the mayor's house, which was conveniently placed next to the restaurant. Also, since the mayor was his kid brother, Terry was next in line for the throne. For some reason, Terry's parents always favored his brother over him; it was probably the "cute" factor... As usual, Terry failed at hitting the bullseye with his crossbow. so went and played Call of Duty Black Ops with a bunch of noobs and STILL failed at getting a killshot. "Fudge this." He said as he decided to take a nap on his first-class pepakura couch. Unfortunately, Terry crushed his couch. But that didn't stop him from trying to sleep the day away. But he forgot about the huge pile of Lego he stashed under his couch... Terry shouted so many obscenities that not even a book the size of Moby Dick; Unabridged could hold them all. Even the restaurant's manager came over to talk to him. Nobody ever talked to Terry. So Terry blew up the manager with a grenade. Unfortunately, now Terry would have to do paperwork. But fudge that! He just burned it; and as a former Boy Scout, Terry knew how to start fires. He especially liked making fires out of the restaurant manager's five-star uber-greasy french fries. Seeing that he had no need for a manager's body, he burned that too. The smell of burning flesh brought all of Terry's doggy friends to his box fort, so he fed them well. "Who wants some chicken fingers?" Terry asked in an adorable Morgan Freeman impression. He had killed Morgan Freeman a while ago, mainly because he criticized Terry's toxic birthday cake that he had made for the mayor's birthday. That was the last criticism that Freeman made, because he ate the whole cake. A lot of people hated Terry for that, so he blew them up with grenades. But somehow, he managed to miss the mayor. Also probably protected by the "cute" factor, even though he was in his twenties... Because of the scientifically unexplained "cute" factor, this made it impossible to kill the mayor, so removing him from office was the closest he could get. As Terry wrote out his spur-of-the-moment plot to remove the mayor from office, he thought about how likely it was that he would get caught. Finding too many opportunities to get caught, he burned that plan in the dying fire. He decided to improvise his plan, he had taken theater in high-school before he was kicked out for being a psychopath. Even though the principal knew he was a sociopath. With Terry's fully not-so-thought-out plan, he left his fort and walked up the unguarded steps of the mayor's house. Since they were family, Terry's brother welcomed him with open arms. "Brother, I am thrilled that you are here." The mayor said. "Cut the Shakespeare." Terry said. "Why are you here?" Terry's brother asked as he pointed an M1911 at Terry. How did that happen? Because his brother was a wizard (but not a very good one). But then Super Fumble came and kicked the gun out off his hand and broke it with his unibrow. "Fear not citizen, Super Fumble is here!" Super Fumble proclaimed. Terry was getting annoyed, so he did what he always did when he was annoyed; he threw a grenade at whoever was annoying him. Namely, Super Fumble. Super Fumble absorbed the blast through his majestic unibrow, but realized his fatal error too late. "Oh ship." Fumble said as he blew up. "That's going on his gravestone." Terry said. "You really have no respect for the deceased, do you." The mayor said. "Now, why are you here?" "I got a job as a private investigator." Terry said. "Self-hired?" The mayor asked. "Yes." Terry responded. "Worthless." Terry's brother said. "I got an anonymous tip that you are stealing electricity." Terry said. "Mind if I take a look?" "Preposterous." The mayor said with disgust. "Thanks." Terry said as he shoved his brother aside. "Would you at least lose the outfit?" The mayor asked. "You look like Deadpool for God's sake." Terry flipped his brother off in response as he walked outside to do an inspection of the mayor's power supply. "Aha!" Terry exclaimed in delight. "Did you find something of interest, brother?" The mayor scoffed as he worked on his tan. "You've been siphoning the restaurant's power!" Terry said enthusiastically. "A crime whose punishment is death." The mayor stood up, spit out his martini, and made his tanning bed disappear (because he's a wizard). "Impossible!" Terry's brother exclaimed. "The proof is in the pudding." Terry said as he handed his brother a large bowl of the stuff. Terry's brother examined the bowl and its contents and pulled out a picture of an extension cord leading to the restaurant (Terry put his extension cord underground to avoid getting caught). "My God!" The mayor exclaimed "I've been framed!" "Only a court trial can determine that." Terry said as a hawk dropped a note on the mayor's head. Terry picked up the note carefully and read it. "Speak of the devil!" Terry said. "There's a trial scheduled for tomorrow." Terry's brother stuttered and nearly fainted. "Fear not Mr. Mayor, I will defend you to the best of my ability." Terry said, even though he had no experience in being a lawyer. "Thank you, brother." The mayor said. "By the way, you may want to shower soon." Terry said. "I think that the hawk dropped more than a note." Terry's brother touched his hair and looked at his hand in disgust. "Ovoire." Terry said as he headed back to his cardboard fort. The next day began as the previous one did, even the new restaurant manager was blown up and burned. Terry examined himself in a suit and tie and decided that he looked much sexier in his work clothes, so he wore that to the trial. The trial was going well until justice Kakaru took over, and revealed that he paid off the jury after he pronounced the mayor guilty. But seeing seeing that he was protected by the mysterious "cute" factor, the mayor was sentenced to life in prison instead of death. "Well brother, it looks like this is farewell." The mayor said sadly as the police arrived and cuffed him. Terry watched with hidden sorrow as they hauled his brother away, the only family Terry had left. Hours passed, then days, then weeks. Terry finally decided that something needed to be done. He marched up the steps of the courthouse and entered justice Kakaru's office. "Justice Kakaru?" Terry asked as he opened the door. "Ah, the PI that found our mayor committing treason." Kakaru said. "I'm a legitimate private investigator now?" Terry asked in surprise. "No, I meant 'Pee-in'." Kakaru replied. "Because of you, we have nobody to lead us!" "Yeah, I suppose that there is something I should do about that." Terry said solemnly. "You're the mayor's brother, correct?" Kakaru asked. "Yes, but that's not what I'm trying to-" Terry was cut off as Kakaru began speaking again. "Perfect! You will lead us then." Kakaru said excitedly. "Um, no." Terry said. "I framed the mayor." "WHAT!?!?!" Kakaru yelled. "I NEED THE ARMY, THE NAVY, THE AIR FORCE, EVERYBODY!" Kakaru yelled into his phone. Within minutes, the courthouse was nothing but rubble as missiles, bombs, and bullets rained from the sky. "My cabbages!" A travelling merchant yelled with anger as his cart was blown up by a stray rocket, and soon, he was out to get Terry too. Everyone had a gun aimed at Terry. The army, the marines, the koalas, everyone. Then a green porta-john materialized in the midst of it all and knocked everybody backwards with its fowl odor. A young man, a bit younger than Terry, then stepped out of the mobile toilet and looked at the carnage that he thought he had caused. "I knew my ship smelled bad, but I didn't think that this would happen." The man said. He then saw the pandas, soldiers, and cabbage salesman on the ground holding weapons. "Oh my, what has happened here?" The man asked to nobody in particular as the crowd began stirring. "Now, if you don't mind, I'll be borrowing this man for some time. Cheerio!" "I'm not getting in there." Terry said in disgust. The man peaked out from around the door. "She's bigger on the inside." He said. Seeing as Terry's only other obvious choice was prison, sharing a magic porta-potty with someone else didn't seem as bad. So Terry got in and almost passed out from all of the awesome. Or awful depending on how you look at it. It was indeed bigger on the inside, with a disco ball, shiny lights, and anything you could dream of, but there were half-eaten pizzas, dirty clothes, and trash all around the main hub. "You like?" The man asked. "It's... interesting." Terry said. "I tried to make it feel as much like home as possible for you." The man said. "I can tell." Terry said, still disgusted that the man thought that this was how Terry lived. "You haven't told me your name." The man said as he flipped some levers and pushed some buttons on the main console. "My name's Terry." Terry said. "Oh no no. That won't do at all." The man said. "Has to be six letters." Terry rolled his eyes and then asked what the man's name was. "They, my friends, call me the doctor." The man said. "But my name's actually Gamepixel." "Doctor Gamepixel?" Terry asked. "Ah, that has a nice ring to it. 'Doctor Gamepixel'. I like it." Gamepixel said. "But I'll still go by Gamepixel. Shorter to write, shorter to say." "Where are we going?" Terry asked as he walked up to a monitor. "Everywhere." Gamepixel replied with a smile.
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It`s Halloween again, (or it WAS,) and time to make a holiday .... thing! CHAPTER 1-900 The matoran never saw it coming. All he did was get groceries, some soap, and a Bionicle set, and then he was attacked by... THE MUTANT KILLER HYBRID WERE-ZOMBIE CLOWN!!! This is how it happened: 1: He walked outside. 2: He saw the mutant killer hybrid were-zombie clown. 3: the mutant killer hybrid were-zombie clown said "hi". 4: matoran screams his head off and runs around the block for 1 1/2 hours (central standard time). Remember: if you meet the mutant killer hybrid were-zombie clown, and HE says "hi", make sure you run around the block for 1 1/2 hours eastern standard time, OR YOU WILL DIE! Happy Halloween
