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The Story If you have an review, go post it. You don't have to read all of my senseless rambling. FIIIIINAAAAALLLLLYYYYY!!!!! Welcome, at long last, to my new...epic. I've already done enough whining over the fact that it is an...epic, so trust me, your criticism on that matter cannot match the amount of self-criticism I have already inflicted. For three. Whole. Years. (You have permission to laugh - I think it is funny too.) It turns out that I was attached to a particular character who was not a comedic character at all for this particular story, and writing a comedy without comedic characters, especially using the Arena Method (I still be doing experiments with that for fun and stuff.) is an enterprise destined for failure. However, my failure in these matters is rather graceful, as I have allowed the character to shine and dictate the lack of comedic-ness rather than trying to force something. In truth, this epic jumps all over the emotional spectrum, from hilarious to Voltexian levels of dark. But that doesn't make it a bad story - it just makes me bad at predicting the future. So here it is. Hope you all enjoy. --------------------------------------------------- This epic has about 36 chapters, plus a short epilogue. Each chapter has approximately 1000 words apiece - some chapters are longer, some shorter, but around there. The epic is entirely pre-written as two of my previous epics are, and as such will be posted weekly, on Thursdays. Every effort will be made to post things ON TIME as I hate when things are not posted ON TIME and don't happen ON TIME. (Hey, I can hold myself to my own standards. ) In the event of a forum crash, chapters will be reposted on the hour, and all interested parties will be informed. And you should go back up your stuff right now because both times I posted a lengthy epic on the forum the forum crashed. I guarantee it will happen again. I may accelerate to a bi-weekly schedule as the epic nears its end and I have more time in which to do so. And without further further ado, go complain about my bad writing or whatever else you wanted to say already. Comments, criticism, and everything else welcome!