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Sunken Cities Discussion

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95 replies to this topic

#81 Offline Shaquille O'Kaithas

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Posted Jul 21 2013 - 02:54 PM

Um, it's a bit too powerful for my tastes. Tone it down and you should be fine.
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#82 Offline avmatoran

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Posted Jul 21 2013 - 03:07 PM

If I remove a Cordak turret and some of the Cordak blasters, will it be better?
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Γαρ επιστιμη!


For science!

(Literally, it means "For knowledge", but it can be taken as "For science")




#83 Offline Shaquille O'Kaithas

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Posted Jul 21 2013 - 06:20 PM

Still not too sure about the water cannons, but for now, that's okay.Just be warned, the monster may take interest.

Edited by The Fourteenth Lakefish, Jul 21 2013 - 06:21 PM.

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#84 Offline Jamags

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Posted Aug 10 2013 - 02:38 PM

Name: Kaju

Because rules: Water, water, everywhere, and all the boards did shrink. Water, water, everywhere, and not a drop to drink. :P

Gender: Male

Species: Po-Toa

Faction: His own, but sometimes works with the Seekers.

Powers: Stone powers

Skills: He is a talented swordfighter, and skilled at navigation. He is also quite agile.

Equipment: A long, brown, coat, and a few navigational instruments

Weapons: A short, curved, sword, and a Cordak blaster

Kanohi: Arthron

Appearance: His mask is brown at the top, and fades into yellow closer to the bottom. His chest armor, hands, and feet are brown as well, with yellow limbs and highlights. He is not an imposing figure, but he is physically fit, and rugged-looking. His armor is old and damaged, and his coat tattered.

Personality: Kaju is arrogant, flamboyant, and quick-witted, more likely to attack with a witty quip about his supposedly amazing skills than he is with a blade.

History: Kaju always spent more time near the water than other Po-Matoran. One day, a dying Toa washed up on the beach of Po-Metru. He gave Kaju 6 Toa Stones, and told him to seek out 5 other destined Matoran. The Matoran became Toa, and set off on a quest, the details of which are only known to Kaju himself. Regardless, only Kaju returned from the mission. However, he was a changed man. He was surly, rebellious, and grim. Eventually, he stole a boat from Ga-Metru, and wasn't heard from for a long time.

 

He's back. His small ship travels the seas, searching for treasure, and taking it from others when possible. He also operates as a bounty hunter, often taking contracts for the Seekers.

 

Ship:

 

Name: The Kardas (Formerly the Aquatic Fikou, renamed when stolen from Ga-Metru)

Appearance: A small ship, barely large enough to be considered one, the Kardas  is an unassuming vessel. It is fast and small, and used to be a fishing boat, until it was stolen and converted to a combat capable ship. It is made of metal, and has a lot of hidden compartments, and even a hidden room, in case the ship gets captured.

Armament: Four large cannons, and several harpoons. The cannons are primarily intended as a warning, rather than a genuine offensive mechanism. The harpoons are there to attach onto an enemy ship, to allow Kaju to board and steal whatever it is he attacked to steal.

 

Faction:

 

Name: Kaju's Crew (He's not all that creative.)

Goals: To become rich and powerful.

Size: No NPCs. I won't be adding any subsequent characters of my own to it. If any players feel like joining, I'll add them, but I want to keep it small. Maximum of 6 people, counting Kaju.


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"I've got a dramatic pose, a dramatic background, and a dramatic sunset. Now get me some dramatic music!" - Me

Credit to Matoran Onknu and Takuma Nuva for sprites used in avatar and signature.


#85 Offline Shaquille O'Kaithas

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Posted Aug 10 2013 - 06:04 PM

Okay, yer approved, matey. Post whenever.I'll have one up soon for Flare and Waz.
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#86 Offline Wazdakka

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Posted Aug 10 2013 - 07:01 PM

Welcome to the game, Jamags!

 

I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask this, but is it fair, that my character being a weapons master, carries a cache of weapons around with him to put in his place of residence for use? 

 

I.e. I let Gariar pick from my box o' goodies, and now he and I are armed with weapons that were not in our profiles, specifically knives and explosives for me, and an underwater flashbang launcher for him.

 

Obviously, these aren't going to be OP-insta-kill weapons, but I'm worried that this is unbalanced.

 

So is it OK? My first RPG, so I'm just trying to play it safe. 


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Steam Name: Toa Onua - always ready for TF2 or a good chat.Xbox Live Gamertag: PluggedSky51173 - Halo 4 for (4) the win!Minecraft Username: ThePoohster - sometimes play on T9K.Wants: 2003 Jaller (from Jaller and Gukko set), Exo-Toa, Turaga Nuju, Turaga Vakama, Black, White, and Grey Krana, Heat Vision, Sonic, Fire Resistance, Power Scream, and Shadow Kraata, Axonn, ORANGE FIKOU.

I got rid of my picture, are you happy?

 

 

 


#87 Offline Jamags

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Posted Aug 10 2013 - 09:41 PM

Okay, yer approved, matey. Post whenever.I'll have one up soon for Flare and Waz.

 

Added to profiles topic.


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"I've got a dramatic pose, a dramatic background, and a dramatic sunset. Now get me some dramatic music!" - Me

Credit to Matoran Onknu and Takuma Nuva for sprites used in avatar and signature.


#88 Offline avmatoran

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Posted Aug 17 2013 - 12:34 PM

What's a Pa-Toa?


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Γαρ επιστιμη!


For science!

(Literally, it means "For knowledge", but it can be taken as "For science")




#89 Offline Shaquille O'Kaithas

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Posted Aug 17 2013 - 12:38 PM

Plasma. I may have messed up and not used a canon abbreviation. I apologize XD
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#90 Offline avmatoran

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Posted Aug 17 2013 - 01:49 PM

Yeah, canon is Su-Toa.


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Γαρ επιστιμη!


For science!

(Literally, it means "For knowledge", but it can be taken as "For science")




#91 Offline ToaDraconixMahvi

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Posted Aug 18 2013 - 03:40 PM

My profile will b two in one, a alternate personality one in fact. Everything after the / is the alternate personality.Name: Galvixx/RevanantGender:maleSpecies: Av-toaFaction: (A custom one) the Exo-wanders.Powers: can use light, and uses a self-made kanohi Miru fused with a kakama, that was poured on by a small vial of energized protodermis, for when the monster suddenly appears.Skills: Is great with the whole flying ship thing, having a crew of 7 and a kanohi nuva of fused speed and levitation, and has sniper-level accuracy, so great is thought of being a sanok wielder. Mostly because kanohi nuva formed to look like a sanok for some unusual reason. Also highly skilled with swords/wonderful with modified heatstone rifle, and skilled with using light to utilize the second ammo, lightstone grenades.Equipment: Spyglass, armor made of protosteel, sniper red dot scope, and a set of maps and a compass.Weapons: a sword and lightstone rifle modified for shooting heatstones.Kanohi: fused kanohi made from slicing and welding together a kanoka kakama and kanoka miru, made to look like a calix, then had energized protodermis poured over making it change shape to a sanok.Appearance: Looks like toa Lewa Nuva, you know, nuva armor, but has metru shoulder armor, and body looks like a metru body, mixed with a mata body, with nuva style limbs. Armor colors are toa nuva of Air, so when pirates look at and prepared for toa of air, and get hit in the face with a blasr of light, well, let's just say, looks on their faces-or what's LEFT that is-is just priceless. Also mata head, and green right eye...red mechanical left eye.Personality: slight paranoia, with great wonderfully friendly easy-going nature, except for when combat mode turns on/has a ruthless nature, killing all that dare try to take his ship, the Exonaut.History: Galvixx was once a normal Av-toa that loved the color green, and wandered the universe, before a Makuta had used him as an experiment, giving his binary mental natures a seperation, and a split personality was created from the more lethal, destructive side. After the flood occured and the Makuta was having the armor get destroyed, Galvixx escaped thanks to using his powers over light to create a solid tube around him and 7 others, and the tube extended to air, sealing out the waters that flouded the underground lab that was used by the makuta. After some time, one of the 7 that Galvixx saved, the only other toa, a toa of Iron, reached out of the tube and grabbed a few kanoka of regeneration, strengh, and levitation, as well as three of speed, and some scraps of metal. That person created the Exonaut, and Galvixx had had brought them up to the surface, and there was a LOT of floating metals, mostly just iron, and the toa of Iron used it all to create the Exonaut, with levers to have the kanoka bang against when enough damage was sustained, and a bunch of other cool stuff. Galvixx was thanked by each saved person, and they all joined him, the toa of iron becoming second mate to Galvixx, and the other 6, a Ta-Skakdi, Fe-vortixx, Ga-Matoran, an a pair of Le-skakdi, have been sailing together since.Ship name: the ExonautAppearance: long, sleek, heavy ship, having been made out of medium-powered kanoka miru, and three tons of iron, normally would not float, but the kanoka miru let's it float, the entire supply of regeneration disks on the inside of the hull, with two kanoka kakama for the propulsion on the back of it. Has a little rust on it, since some of the iron was rusted big time.Armaments: 4 repeating lightstone rifles in case of toa of air pirates, a single cordak revolving blaster, and a repeating kanoka disk launcher for ship-to-ship combat.History: Is a semi-famous ship, well known for its captain, and its crew, thanx to having foiled 34 pirate attacks done to it, and that it seems to never sink, and never get damaged for long. The first mate, a toa of Iron named Martill, who wore a kanohi Calix, is the one person that was positively identified as what he was. The famous captain is still an enigma by all that trade with him. Very little about where the crew met is known, as well as why they all seem to be friends, even the ga-matoran is friends with the skakdi and vortixx!This is where the crew are placed, each one. I would like to have some people play as my crew...Name: MartillGender: maleRace: Fe-ToaFaction: Exo-wandersPowes: control of everything metal.Skills: can control the protodermis disks from repeating disk launcher to make sure they always hit. Has no experience in anything else, except shaping tools.Equipment and weapons: none.Kanohi: Pakari, and a kaukau for when the metal supplies for disks get low.Appearance: like toa lewa nuva, non adaptive armor version that is.Personality: to the point, calm, collected in the face of danger.History: unknown, since had the whole amnesia thing. Only knew name, how to use powers, and what kanoka is what by touching it.Names: Lestron and StrotillGender MalesFaction: Exo-wandersRace: le-skakdiPowers: weird skills with air thanks to the makuta.Skills: can fly on their own, have special advantages with the lightstone repeaters on the Exonaut, and ones a sword master, the other, scythe master.Weapons: Lestron uses a sword, Strotill uses a scythe.Equipment: whetstones, lightstone and heatstone grenades.Appearance: like thok.History: what's to say? These two are good guys, and hate evil makuta and pirates. REALLY hate pirates in fact. No one knows why but them.Name: GaviraGender: femaleSpecies: Ga-matoranFaction: like the last four, since every faction listed gonna be the same for all 8.Skills: great at reading maps. And throwing daggers.Weapons: throwing daggers.Equipment: map-reading gear and a few telescopes.Appearance: metru nui Ga- matoran.History: same as the last 3, being Martill, Lestron, and Strontill, in other words, unknown, since she keeps secrets a lot.Name: SeveranxGender: FemaleSpecies: Fe-vortixxFaction: Exo-wandersPowers: none, because of makuta experiments with elements.Skills: good accuracy, and great with the lightstone repeaters.Equipment: ammo clips for the lightstone repeater she is always at-even when asleep!Weapons: noneAppearance: just like Roodaka.History: is Roodaka's older sister. The rest is not known.Name: Hunter (since hasn't given real name yet)Gender: maleSpecies: ta-skakdiFaction: exo-wandersSkills: only good at fighting at medium range. So he uses the cordak on top of the ship.Appearance: Avak with hakann feet.Weapons: a small pistol version of the cordak gun, and the cordak gun on the ship.Equipment: light armor, but one that's very durable.History: was part of hand of artahka, but other than that, he doesn't tell a soul.Powers: has seriously strong mental walls, and telescopic vision.
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#92 Online Simon the Digger

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Posted Aug 21 2013 - 12:50 AM

In a word; No.First of all, the issue that is present in every single one of the profiles; I am not approving a faction manned entirely by your characters, especially one with no defined goal, no defined behavior, and no defined reason for being other than "They're all survivors". And frankly, "Exo-Wanders" doesn't make any sense as a name. You don't need to have a faction to have a ship, nor do you need one to have several characters together. The faction is superfluous. Much like the one Lorax submitted on the first or second page, not approved.

 

Galvixx is overpowered in every way imaginable. That mask effectively grants him two powers, plus you state that is accuracy is nearly that of a Sanok. Speaking as someone who has staffed before, what that really means is that their abilities will be treated at or just below that level. His element is not one that I can approve without severe limitations, simply due to the sheer power it wields. His appearance isn't really described, and his bio... I'm sorry, but it doesn't work. He wouldn't save himself let alone anyone else with a tube of solid light. Metal doesn't float, so there would be no materials to craft the ship with, and the tube wouldn't even have made it up from the bottom. Disapproved.

 

The Exonaut is not approved. It has far too much armor, far too many weapons, and far too much potential for quick regeneration. And it's bio is not allowable. Thirty four pirate attacks? Famous for not being sunken? Disapproved.

 

Martill is a bare-bones profile, not even enough for me to actually consider him a character. And he looks suspiciously like he was designed just to augment the Exonaut. Plus, he can't always make sure his attacks hit. Disapproved.

 

Lestron and Strontil should have their own profiles, and that profile isn't detailed enough for one character. Disapproved.

 

Gavira has even less to work with than the last three. I cannot approve a profile in this state. Disapproved.

 

Severanx has all of the issues of the last three, plus a canon snarl; She can't be Roodaka's older sister. Just doesn't work. Disapproved.

 

Hunter, again, has no real profile. I cannot approve it. Disapprove.

 

Honestly? My suggestion is thus; Cut out at least half the characters you were planning here, and focus on what remains. Polish them up, bring them to a proper power standard. They all need serious detail and revision, and it wouldn't hurt to scan them for grammatical errors. And as for my last tip... Comparing them to canon characters isn't a proper way to relay an appearance.


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#93 Offline Jamags

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Posted Aug 21 2013 - 03:03 PM

I think I'll make another one.

 

Name: Denix

Gender: Male

Species: De-toa

Faction: Seekers

Powers: Creating, controlling, and absorbing sound.

Skills: Is skilled at stealth in his own right, complimented by his kanohi, and is gifted at hand-to-hand combat and martial arts. Has high accuracy, and is also quite intelligent.

Equipment: Smoke bombs, a grapple gun, and a small laser cutter.

Weapons: Two daggers, a lightstone rifle, and a light staff (can only fire small light blasts, and takes approximately 5 minutes to recharge between blasts.)

Kanohi: Volitak

Appearance: In set form, he would be Inika Build. He is tall, thin, and imposing. His mask, chest armor, forearms, and lower legs are black. His shoulder armor, upper legs, and feet are dark grey. His armor is sleek and polished, but angular and sharp. It is also not heavy armor, designed for mobility and stealth.

Personality: He's smart, devious, smooth, dedicated, charismatic, and tricky. He can convince someone that their most prized possession just fell in the ocean and that they need to go retrieve it, but isn't afraid of simply pushing them overboard. He's manipulative and sneaky, but not above getting personally involved. Despite his devious nature, he's also brave and loyal to his own cause. He's not afraid of killing, but will only kill those he feels deserves it. Which would be a lot of people.

 

(Blank space to break up wall of text)

 

History: No one knows where he came from. Some say even he doesn't know, though when asked, he'll respond "What's it to you?" implying that he does know. One day, many years ago, he appeared on the southern continent, fighting off a Rahi attack on a small village. No one even saw which direction he came from. All they know is that he took down three Muakas unarmed. The village was Mahri Nui. He was there for a while, but was travelling on mainland Voya Nui when Mahri broke off. When the Great Spirit was injured in the Matoran Civil War, an earthquake sent Denix's coastal home into the sea. He later arrived at Zakaz, where he lived a life of secrecy until the Flood, when he escaped on a boat. He sailed to the Great Provider, but his boat crashed. He lived on the Provider for a while, when the Seeker fleet came on a supply run, and he joined them.


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"I've got a dramatic pose, a dramatic background, and a dramatic sunset. Now get me some dramatic music!" - Me

Credit to Matoran Onknu and Takuma Nuva for sprites used in avatar and signature.


#94 Online Simon the Digger

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Posted Aug 21 2013 - 04:09 PM

Approved.


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#95 Offline Toa of Anarchy

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Posted Nov 05 2013 - 10:54 AM

Name Srach

Gender Male

Spieces Vortixx

Faction None-Solo Pirate

Alligence Chaotic Bad, works as a solo pirate

Powers and Abilites Srach has excellent hand-eye coordination and piloting skills of all vehicles. He is a incredible marksman and is very good at camouflaging himself with his surrondings, especially underwater. He is also a expert at melee combat even underwater melee combat ;)

Equipment For his first piece of forigen technology, Srach carries a Vortixx Rhotuka Battle Ax. For his second, he carries a Energy Extraction Rifle.

Description Srach is Tall and broad, he camouflagues himself to his surrondings so his coloring is always in flux. He has bright light blue eyes and will most likely seen with his Battle Ax slung across his back and his Energy Extraction holstered on his right thigh, if he is above water. If he is below, he will where a Aquasuit mounted with a Cordak Blaster.

History Srach is a solo pirate, sinking ships, retriving the most precious cargo, and returning to Xia where he sells them.

Personality Srach has a powerful personality, always voicing his opinion and rarely listening, not that there are many people to talk to. He enjoys melee combat and interrogating prisoners. water water everywhere but not a drop to drink :afro:

 

Ship

Name Ika

Type Submarine (weakness is it can only stay underwater for 4 hours)

Apperance Ika is a one man submarine, run by Srach. It is painted light blue so it is hard to see in waters close to the surface. It is designed to be indetectible to sonar. Ika is aprx. 10 meters long

Armament Ika carries multipule torpedo launchers and plenty of ammunition. Its torpedos are designed to sink ships as fast as possible, as the torpedos fixiate themselves into the ships side or hull and then explode, causing massive flooding. Ika is equiped with advanced computer and systems. It also has a diving bay which pilots can use to exit/enter the ship.  

History Ika was designed by Srach and a group of other Vortixx. They were planning on selling it, but Srach stole it.


Edited by Toa of Anarchy, Nov 05 2013 - 10:56 AM.

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"A few grass mats, some cave drawings, the heads of my enemies mounted on the wall ... it could be quite pleasant."
— Vezon, Federation of Fear

 

"Where are we going? Why are we going? Are we going at all, or just sailing in a big circle? Or is it a spiral? I went down a spiral once: a big stone tunnel that went down and down and down, and ended in Zyglak. Whoever built it had no decorating sense at all."
— Vezon, Destiny War

 

"And you still haven't answered any of my one-hundred ten questions, or my follow ups."
— Vezon to Trinuma, Destiny War

 

"Quite a collection. I prefer sea-shells, myself. Sometimes leaves. Oh, and the heads of my enemies, though those take up so much space."
— Vezon, Destiny War

 

 

 

 


#96 Offline Black Six

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Posted Nov 05 2013 - 02:37 PM

As per this topic, RPG Contest 28 winners are no longer eligible for play.
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