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The Bz-Nui Hack Wars

BZ-Nui hack wars lewa0111 repost mib

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#1 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Oct 25 2011 - 12:45 AM

Hello, everyone, Lewa0111 here! As several of you probably know, I recently held a vote in my blog for which of my prose comedies I would repost and update first, and the winner was this comedy, The BZ-Nui Hack Wars. As a result, I will be reposting old chapters once a day until I catch up to where I was originally, at which time I will try to write new chapters twice a week, most likely Wednesdays and Saturdays.

 

For those of you who never read the original topic, this comedy is based on the true events surrounding the MiB hackings of BZPower's forums in the spring of 2009, during which I myself was hacked and temporarily banned. Several actual BZPower members who were a part of the original movement to get me unbanned (and several who weren't) applied to be in the original topic, and since the story wouldn't make sense without them, they will still appear. If you want to appear in the comedy, just let me know! My real-life college friend, who is known as Gabriella0111: Toa of Music here on BZP, also co-authored a few of the chapters (and was involved in the original events), so if I'm ever too busy to update sometime down the line, I might ask her to post the next chapter instead. And now, presenting...

 

THE BZ-NUI HACK WARS

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 1: Lewa0111

 

Tava: Hey, cool! That's a lot of '1's in that title! By the way, did you know that '1' is the second number in Pi? Pi goes like this: 3.14159265358979323--

 

Random Guys From Monty Python: SHUT THE KARZAHNI UP!!

 

Tava: Fine... *leaves*

 

Author Me: Well, that was weird...this is supposed to be a prose comedy anyway! Oh well, on with the show!

 

Deep within the tangled labyrinth of a planet that is the Internet, known as Cyber Magna, lies a secluded and largely-forgotten island called BZ-Nui. Its population of OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND! members, led by the almighty Staff, work hard to keep the island free of the constant plagues, spam, and all-around bad things that were constantly around the rest of Cyber Magna. Despite this, the occasional attack still occurred, such as the time the infamous Spam Trio, made up of conner, king at the sok factoree, and leeningtower of pizza, broke through BZ-Nui's gated walls and sprayed graffiti about things like 'do we rly hav 2 follow the ruls', 'brakelatabasaasta feed me :wacko: ', and 'my foot on a toenail' all around the island. They were eventually captured, although the graffiti was left there, mainly because of how hilarious it all was. Or the time when a crazy Maori warrior went on a killing spree and destroyed several members before being banished forever. But all of these times, life went on...yet that was about to change...

 

"Ouch! Darn Board Message..." groaned Lewa0111, massaging his hand where the large, metal Board Message had slammed shut on it, crushing the notebook in which he had been writing out the latest chapter of Ask Matau!. "Not again. Why do these things always show up whenever I'm about to post a comedy chapter?"

 

Behind him, Toa Gabriella: Toa of Music laughed. "Make sure it wasn't the Rahkshi of Coincidence Control again...otherwise, I'd say it's just bad luck. I guess we'll both have to take a walk until this thing lifts."

 

"Yeah, probably. I was planning on going over to Bioniclestory.com for a while--I heard there's a new story cereal up!"

 

"Don't you mean 'serial?'" asked Lewa0111.

 

"No, I mean 'cereal.' Haven't you heard of the new "Reign of Shad-O's?" Packed with 9999999999% of all nonessential vitamins and minerals! Perfect for evil universe masterminds!"

 

"Uhh...I think I'll just say :blink: to that one," said Lewa0111. "Anyway, I'm not feeling too hungry right now. I'll probably be heading back to the Home Page to take a break for a while. Maybe tomorrow I'll try updating some comedies again, ok?"

 

Gabriella shrugged. "Sure, I guess. I'll see you tomorrow then! Maybe sooner if I can manage it!"

 

" :howdy: " waved Lewa0111, leaving the blocked Comedies Forum and exiting through the main gates of the BZ-Nui forums, entering the Home Page.

 

He noticed a large store currently selling the latest BIONICLE foam weapons, next to a newsstand with a headline proclaiming the release of said foam weapons. "Redundancy is redundant," said a random Matoran walking by. Lewa0111 nodded and sat down, opening his Word Processor and trying his hardest to recall as much of the chapter he had lost due to the Board Message. Just another typical day in BZ-Nui...

 

* * *

 

High above the steel walls of BZ-Nui, sitting inside a hot air balloon, two shadowy figures watched. No, they were not Jessie and James from Team Rocket, and if you thought they were, then I have a message for you: WRONG STORY! Anyway, they were just two generically shadowy and mysterious figures whose identity is not to be revealed at this time (although they are not Bob the Pirate :pirate: and Joe the Coffee Rahkshi :wakeup: either).

 

"There it is. Do you think we can get inside?" asked the first generically nameless shadowy mysterious figure.

 

"We have to. There is no other alternative," said the second.

 

"Wait, isn't 'other' already implied in the word 'alternative?' So basically you're saying 'other other option,' which makes no sense at all."

 

"It makes perfectly sensical sense."

 

"Redundancy is redundant!" said the same random Matoran who had passed Lewa0111 in the Home Page, flying by on a jetpack for no apparent reason.

 

" :blink: " emoticonned the two mysteriously nameless generic shadowy unidentified figures as the random Matoran flew away.

 

TO BE CONTINUED...

 

Next: "The Most Evilestly Evil Plan of Evilness!"

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 03 2014 - 06:08 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#2 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Oct 26 2011 - 12:10 AM

It's time for another reposted chapter update!

 

THE BZ-NUI HACK WARS

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 2: Will the real Lewa0111 please stand up!?!?!?

 

Pohatu: By the way, I love exclamation points and--

 

Everyone: DON'T USE THAT JOKE!

 

Lewa0111: For the last time, this is a PROSE COMEDY! *Kicks Everyone and Pohatu out*

 

"A hole? That's your Most Evilestly Evil Plan of Evilness? How lame," said Mysterious Shadowy Figure #1.

 

"Why? What's wrong with a hole? We can make Hapori Tohu fall into our hole and then hold him hostage! It's a great plan!"

 

"Well, first of all, Hapori Tohu doesn't have feet; he floats around everywhere, so how the Karzahni are we supposed to make him fall in? Also, my plan is much better!"

 

"O RLY?"

 

The BZP member O RLY? appeared, bopped both mysterious figures over the heads with a rubber mallet, then disappeared. Once he had recovered, Mysterious Shadowy Figure #2 emoticonned, " :sly: " as he began to explain the details of his plan to the other Mysterious Shadowy Figure...

 

* * *

 

Several days later, Mesonak: The Shadow Warlord, another citizen of BZ-Nui, was hanging out around the newly reopened Comedies Forum. He had just finished posting the latest chapter of his comedy, "Ask Mesonak," and was hoping to run into Lewa0111 so that he could show him the update when his E-Mailbox began to beep, signaling a new message. He pulled out the small cell phone-like device and read the new message. "You have received a new Personal Message on your BZ-Nui Personal Messenger System," it said.

 

"Great," sighed Mesonak, as he put the E-Mailbox back in his nonexistent pocket and withdrew his BNPMS instead.

 

"You have received a new E-Mail on your E-Mailbox," the PM said.

 

He sighed again as he withdrew his E-Mailbox and read the new message. "You have received a new Personal Message..."

 

Random Narrator From Spongebob Who Speaks In Script: Three hours later...

 

"About time!" exclaimed Mesonak, as he opened his BZPMS to see a message from Lewa0111, the message that had started all of the nonsense in the previous paragraph. "I wonder what's going on?" He opened the PM and gasped. " :OMG: " he emoticonned. "WHAT ON BZ-NUI IS THIS!?" It was a poorly drawn cartoon of Hapori Tohu being stabbed with a cardboard foam cut-out of a BIONICLE weapon, along with the following message:

 

HA HA HA!!

This is an ultimatum. If BZ-Nui is not evacuated and abandoned by March 12th, 2009, we have the power to utterly ruin many important and prominent citizens' lives forever. This is not an empty threat. We are powerful. There can be no resistance.

 

Signed,The Ferrets in Beige

 

Mesonak stared. This couldn't be true--he'd known Lewa0111 for a long time, and he'd never seemed like the type to join an organization dedicated to the destruction of BZ-Nui...or was he? And what was with the lame name--'Ferrets in Beige?' Honestly. To Mesonak, this seemed like much more than he could handle. He would have to find Lewa0111 and see for himself. He spotted a hyperlink to 'Member Profiles' and hopped in, as the mass-transport system warped him almost instantly to Lewa0111's profile. There, he noticed Lewa0111, but it wasn't really him--it was clearly someone wearing a badly drawn silver Miru cut-out over his face and wearing a sign reading "i am te h reel lewa0111 ok?" around his neck. "Who are you?" he asked the Lewa0111 impersonator.

 

 

"i iZ tE rEeL lEwA011!!!!duh just read the sign!!!!donttalktomerightnow!!!!11!one"

 

"No you're not. I've known Lewa0111 for ages, and you're not him. You're just some moron wearing a badly drawn silver Miru cut-out."

 

"WHAT R U TALKING ABOUT I'M RAELLY LEWA0111!! BZNUI MUST DIE!1!! GET OUT OF HERE!"

 

Mesonak shrugged. He had to take this immediately to the staff. This was a job for the Report Button. Before the Lewa0111 impersonator had time to react, Mesonak slapped the nearby Report Button, which began to transport him away to the Staff Headquarters. Strangely, the impersonator made no move to try and stop him...almost as though he wanted Mesonak to report him...

 

TO BE CONTINUED...

 

Next: The Fate of the Banished!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 03 2014 - 06:12 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#3 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Oct 26 2011 - 10:23 PM

And it's time for another reposted chapter. Also, Gabriella will probably be posting the next chapter (which was originally one of hers) if I can get her to go on BZP tomorrow (which hopefully should happen!) Expect to hear from her instead of me then.

 

THE BZ-NUI HACK WARS

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 3: Banned! :o

 

Keelerak: Did you just use an emoticon in the title?

 

Lewa0111: Yes I did. So?

 

Keelerak: So? Nobody uses emoticons in titles! That's just...BEYOND ridiculous!

 

Lewa0111: I'm the author! I can use emoticons in my titles if I want! And haven't we already discussed that this is a PROSE comedy?

 

Toa Zaxvo: NO EMOTICONS IN COMEDIES!!! IT'S LOW-QUALITY!! ESPECIALLY IN TITLES!

 

Keelerak: Who's he?

 

Lewa0111: A guest star.

 

Keelerak: But the chapter hasn't even started yet!

 

Lewa0111: I know! AUTHOR POWERS!

 

*Zaxvo and Keelerak vanish*

 

ANYWAY...

 

The next morning, Lewa0111 woke up. For a moment, he had no idea where he was. Then, for another moment, he still had no idea where he was. Then he realized that he would still have no idea where he was no matter how many moments passed. He had gone to sleep in his Offline Dormitory within the Home Page, having as usual chosen to be remembered to avoid having to log in the next day. However, the place where he now was looked nothing like the Home Page...or anywhere else on BZ-Nui for that matter. He was in a place of horrific proportions, rampant with advertising, clogged with overusage, and featuring a commercialized rainbow title on its gates. This was a place on Cyber Mata where he preferred to avoid as much as possible. It was impossible that he had found himself waking up here, of all places.

 

He had awakened inside the smoggy, overcrowded, polluted city of Google-Nui.

 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he screamed.

 

Suddenly, a large Advertiser loomed up from the ground in front of him, blotting out the sun with its large mass, rampant with an advertisement displaying EBay's logo. "Looking for 'NOOOOOOOOOOO?' Find exactly what you're looking for today! EBay.com!"

 

Panicking momentarily, Lewa0111 grabbed his twin Air Katana from his invisible Member's Pocket™ and prepared to send a tornado laced with Comedic Author Powers at the Advertiser, blasting it away. He pointed his weapons at the creature and focused. Then he decided it really was time to panic.

 

His Elemental Powers were gone.

 

"Looking for 'Elemental Powers?' Find exactly what you're looking for today! EBay.com!" The Advertiser continued to advance on him.

 

"I don't want to buy my Elemental Powers on EBay! Get away from me!"

 

"Looking for 'I Don't Want To Buy My Elemental Powers On EBay Get Away From Me?' Find exactly what you're looking for today! EBay.com!" It was almost on top of him now. The thing's persuasiveness was overpowering. Lewa0111 felt himself getting sucked into the vortex at the Advertiser's heart, which would send him directly to EBay and a 'No Search Results' page from which he would not escape.

 

Luckily, he then remembered that despite having no Elemental Powers, his Air Katana still worked pretty well as swords. He crossed them in front of him, shoving outward and sending the Advertiser sprawling. Taking advantage of this, he quickly sheathed the weapons and ran in the other direction, toward where he could see the rainbow-colored logo representing Google-Nui's gates and dock looming overhead.

 

"Looking for 'Getting Hit With An Air Katana?' Find exactly what you're looking for today! EBay.com!"

 

Lewa0111 ignored this and kept running, not stopping until he had made it through the gates (after fending off several more Advertisers, a few Scams, and a Credit Report Score vortex). There was the massive dock, a large white box stretching lengthwise across the shore, from which innumerable watercraft were docking and leaving. Spaced evenly along the shore were several smaller docks, labeled with such things as 'Images,' 'Videos,' 'Maps,' 'News,' 'Shopping,' and 'Gmail.' He looked around at the main dock until he spotted a small empty speedboat, with an open Search Terminal near it. Rushing over to the terminal, he quickly typed in 'BZPower' and waited for the search results.

 

[PLEASE DEPOSIT 25 WIDGETS.]

 

"What?" asked Lewa0111. "I don't have to pay to use Google!"

 

[YES YOU DO. PLEASE DEPOSIT 25 WIDGETS.]

 

"No way! You can't make me pay!"

 

[EVERYONE PAYS. GOOGLE IS PART OF THE INTERNET. EVERYONE PAYS TO GO TO CYBER MAGNA.]

 

"What? I'm already here! I shouldn't have to pay if I'm already here!"

 

[WHAT IS YOUR INTERNET SERVICE PROVIDER?]

 

"I don't have one! I live here, you stupid search bar! Just let me search!"

 

[NO. PLEASE INPUT YOUR BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER, INSURANCE CARD, SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER, AND E-MAIL ADDRESS AND PAY 25 WIDGETS. YOU WILL BE REIMBURSED LATER WITH 2500 WIDGETS, 100 TIMES THE AMOUNT YOU PUT IN.]

 

Lewa0111 sighed. He should have known. He pulled out his Air Katana, pointed it at the search terminal, and glared. Within a few moments, the Scam hugging the terminal's surface began to change back to its usual disgusting greenish-brown color and the paper-thin creature began to slither away. After checking carefully to make sure there were no more lurking about, he once again typed in 'BZPower.' Luckily, BZ-Nui's listing happened to be the first listing available, and so he jumped in the boat, which began to speed away rapidly to what he hoped was BZ-Nui, where hopefully he would be able to find some answers about just what was going on. One thing was certain, though: he'd have an interesting story to tell his friends when he got back to the island.

 

Finally, after an unusually long time (7 nanoseconds, up from the usual 2.18563929), the boat pulled up to the dock outside BZ-Nui. He stepped onto the shore and walked up to the gates separating the dock from the Home Page. As usual, the gates appeared open and inviting.The moment he approached, however, the gates abruptly slammed shut. Another Board Message smashed down onto his hand, which was odd: Board Messages were never present on the Home Page, only within the forums. Even more shocking was the message displayed on the newly closed gates. He blinked and rubbed his eyes (not an easy feat when you're wearing a Kanohi mask), hoping that this was all just some terrible nightmare.

 

Lewa0111 had been banned.

 

TO BE CONTINUED...

 

Next: Allies and Enemies!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 03 2014 - 06:15 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#4 Offline Toa Gabriella0111

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Posted Oct 28 2011 - 11:33 PM

Hi, everyone, I'm back to the forums! I showed up the first day they were back, then got distracted for a while...but Lewa# reminded me that he's reposting this comedy and that I need to repost my old chapters too! So, here goes! The BZ-Nui Hack WarsA BIONICLE comedy by Lewa0111!Gabriella Chapter 1: Invasions, Investigations, Instigations, Inventions, And Other Things That Start With 'In'The next morning, Toa Gabriella: Toa of Music woke up in her Offline Dormitory, in the exact same place where she had gone to sleep the night before. This was absolutely expected and ordinary. What was not expected and ordinary was the fact that...well, okay, there wasn't really anything that was out of the ordinary about that morning whatsoever. Deciding that this was probably a good thing, she prepared to enter the Home Page. Passing a newsstand with a headline proclaiming that BIONICLE: The Legend Reborn was slated to be released in about a year, right next to a stand selling pirated copies of BIONICLE: The Legend Reborn, she entered the forums, arriving in her usual location of the New Member Q&A Forum. She spotted an open topic and decided to enter it to see if she could be of some help.[quote name='Some noob]TOPIC TITLE: Wut???Topic Subtitle: need help pleasehow do u maek a noo toipc???// help me!!11 :o :pirate: :tohu:[/QUOTE]"You obviously can make a topic if you posted this' date='" said the first reply. About eighty-six more posts said things that were no more helpful than this. One post, by Burnmad: Toa of Emoticons, read, "If you scroll to the top or bottom of the forum, you will see a button labeled, 'Add Reply.' Click it and you can make a new topic." A few more posts offered nothing of any more value.Gabriella sighed and smacked the Report Button, which whisked her off to the Moderation Chamber of -Windrider-. "State your report," said -Windrider-'s secretary, a Ga-Matoran by the name of Some Random Blue Girl Who No One Cares About."The topic is full of spam replies that are mostly restating the obvious. The topic should be locked.""Fine. -Windrider- will take care of it soon; however, the Moderators are all very busy at the moment owing to recent circumstances.""Recent circumstances? Like what?""I don't know, I'm just a secretary."Shrugging, Gabriella left the Moderation Chamber and was redirected back to the New Member Q&A forum. Seeing no other open topics, she left and made her way down to the Library District, entering the Comedies Forum. Here, she finally spotted something unusual: there had been hardly any updates at all since the night before, and none whatsoever from Lewa0111. This in and of itself was odd, but the popular author's comedies '2009 Theories' and 'Ask Matau!' had also been closed. A sinking feeling began to come over her. "Hey, what are you doing in here?" demanded the captain of the submarine that she had somehow wandered into. "We're getting ready to sink! Get out!" He then kicked her out of the submarine, where she landed back on firm ground inside Comedies.She began breaking into a run toward the closed comedies, driven by a desire to find out what exactly was going on. When she was about halfway there, she collided headlong into another member. "Sorry," she apologized, picking up her Personal Messenger that she had dropped. Then she looked up, only to see the familiar face of Mesonak: The Shadow Warlord! "Mesonak! Sorry for running into you like this...""It's okay. I'd been hoping to talk to you; have you seen Lewa0111 around lately? The [i']real[/i] Lewa0111, I mean.""No, why? And what do you mean by 'real Lewa0111?'""I got a rather bizarre threat message via PM from him the other day, or at least it said it was from him. When I visited his profile, there was some noob impersonating him instead, though, so I reported him. I haven't seen the real Lewa0111 in a while. When did you see him last?""Just yesterday. Did you notice, though?" She pointed behind Mesonak to the ominous forms of the two closed comedies. "Lewa0111 wouldn't intentionally break rules in his comedies, and he would never ask for them to be closed. Something smells fishy.""I think that's probably him," said Mesonak, pointing to a random Matoran walking by, eating a large salmon. "But I still think we should check things out.""We could start by interrogating this 'impersonator' of his. Maybe he might provide some answers. Actually, come to think of it, I've seen quite a few impersonators around lately. I wonder what they're up to?""No idea. Let's grab a hyperlink." The two members then entered 'Ga-Metru School Musical' (which thankfully had not been closed yet) and used the link in Lewa0111's post to arrive at his profile.Gabriella looked around. "I don't see the imposter...or anyone else, for that matter." She strode over to the comments box and opened it. "Huh?""You could have just :huh: ed," Mesonak pointed out. He looked at the comments as well, many of them demanding Lewa0111 explain why he had sent threats and disturbing images to members he had never even had any contact with whatsoever."This doesn't make any sense," voiced Gabriella, obviously growing more concerned by the moment. "This is BZ-Nui. Things like this don't happen around here." Then, she caught a flash of brilliant pink out of the corner of her eye. "What's that?" When she saw what it was, she emoticonned, " :OMG: "Group: Banned Members"Mesonak...look."Mesonak looked. "WHAT THE KARZAHNI!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?" he screamed. Pohatu attempted to appear, but since Lewa0111 was banned, he found himself blocked off from BZ-Nui. "How could--how did--when did--impossible!""I was thinking the same thing," Gabriella agreed. "Something's very wrong here.""Indeed it is," said a voice from behind them. The two members turned around to see a cloaked figure wearing a poorly drawn cardboard cut-out of a Pakari Nuva, wielding a strange keyboard-like device and a Tuurahk staff. Around his neck, he wore a sign that read, 'i iz a member ov BzP!1!11one.' "My name is...well, I have many names. All you really need to know is that I really, really dislike people who snoop around banned members like this. Lewa0111's loss was oh so tragic, and it wouldn't do to have people like you defiling his profile." His voice dripped with sarcasm."Lewa0111 WILL return!" shouted Mesonak, sending a blast of shadow toward the figure, who dodged it with ease. "You're outnumbered and alone, you creep!"Mesonak's next blast was countered with a shield projected from the keyboard-looking device. The cloaked figure ran forward, thrusting with the staff as Mesonak dodged it and quickly pulled out a keyboard, typing out a joke involving pie. A pie then materialized in his hand, which he smashed in his foe's face. Before he had time to recover from the sticky mess, Gabriella leaped forward, calling her constant companion Photok to her side from where he had been busy not existing in this comedy. The diminuitive toy-sized Matoran jumped to the ground and pulled out a tripwire, wrapping it around the enemy's feet while Gabriella kept him busy with repeated bursts of obnoxiously loud music from her music-note-shaped blade. Their foe pivoted to engage her, knocking her blade out of her hand with his staff and sending her flying backward while Mesonak attacked from behind, using his Personal Messenger to send several questions to their foe:[quote name='Mesonak's PM]Questions for Ask Mysterious Cloaked Guy!1. Dear Mysterious Cloaked Guy' date='Do you like tacos?--Anonymous2. Mysterious Cloaked Guy,Eat viruses!--Bob the Pirate :pirate:3. MCG, what do you want? Are there more than one of you?--Signed, Mesonak4. To: MCGFrom: TavaPIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PIPIEPIPUIPI!!!!!!!!!1!1Pie = 3.14159265358979323! I WUB PIEZ! :br:5. To Mysterious Cloaked Guy,Are you and your organization the same ones who impersonated Lewa0111, sent me a threat message, and got Lewa0111 banned? If so, why?--Signed, Mesonak6. Mysterious Cloaked Guy, AKA MCG:What is the square root of applesauce?7. MCG,You look like applesauce! I think I'll eat you! OM NOM NOM!~Toa of Applesauce[/QUOTE']The mysterious cloaked guy looked at his PM system in horror. "I AM NOT RUNNING AN ASK COMEDY, YOU STUPID--!" Before he could finish his sentence, Photok had finished tripping him with the cable, and he crashed to the floor. Mesonak and Gabriella glared at him. "Yes. You are now," said Mesonak coldly. "Get ready to do some answering."TO BE CONTINUED...Next: "Ask Mysterious Cloaked Guy!"ToaG Productions, Inc. (in association with Lewa# Studios)~Toa Gabriella
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My three favorite things are Bionicle, High School Musical, and Lewa0111. Guess what? They're all in one topic! Or, visit my comedy: The Story of Toa Gabriella
Hey, I'm a Toa--a Toa of Music, that is! But hang on, wasn't I a Turaga before? Something seems backwards...


Are you a fan of any or all of Lewa0111's comedies? Then please, help me with making a wiki for them! Just search "Lewa0111 Comedy Wiki" on any search engine to find it (since I can't link to sites with forums!) Thanks a ton! ^_^

#5 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Oct 31 2011 - 02:45 PM

Thanks for posting, Gabriella! Next chapter's mine, coming up now!

 

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 4: The Horrors of Karzahni The Lego Message Boards... :fear:

 

Toa Zaxvo: NO EMOTICONNING IN COMEDIES! DOUBLY SO IN TITLES!!

 

Lewa0111: Get out of here. I'm the author, I can do what I want!

 

Toa Zaxvo: No wai!

 

Lewa0111: Ya wai!

 

Toa Zaxvo: O RLY?

 

Lewa0111: YA RLY!

 

Toa Zaxvo: LOL?

 

Lewa0111: LUK BEHIND U!

 

Toa Zaxvo: I don't think that response worked...

 

Lewa0111: No, seriously, look behind you.

 

Toa Zaxvo: Why, what--

 

*The BZP member O RLY? appears, bops Toa Zaxvo over the head with a rubber mallet, then disappears*

 

 

 

Okay, now back to the actual chapter at hand.

 

 

 

"Excuse me!" shouted Lewa0111, pounding a katana on the Board Message blocking his way into BZ-Nui in frustration. Why BZ-Nui was in frustration, Lewa0111 didn't know, and anyway, he had more pressing matters to deal with--such as his apparent banishment. "Please! There's been a misunderstanding!"

 

"Get out of the way, you lousy banned loser!" grunted a pair of Raptors who were passing by, trying to get into BZ-Nui. "We real members who follow the rules need to get to the Forums!"

 

"But I have followed the rules; I've done nothing wrong," explained Lewa0111 desperately.

 

The Raptors would hear none of it. "Get out of the way and let us through or we'll call the Moderators."

 

"Fine. Call them. I swear I'm innocent!"

 

"I don't think we'll bother with that. Just move."

 

"But--" Lewa0111 sighed, seeing as a large crowd of BZ-Nui inhabitants began to crowd in front of the blocked entrance. "Fine. By the way, welcome to BZ-Nui, all you new Inhabitants! It's nice seeing so many new members joining at once." He reluctantly stepped away from the entrance, at which point the Board Message blocking his entrance retracted, allowing the others to pass through. Once everyone had entered, he approached the gates once again, but the Board Message returned, slamming shut with a SLAM.

 

"Redundancy is redundant!" exclaimed the same random Matoran from the first chapter, who happened to be riding by on a unicycle.

 

With a :blink:, Lewa0111 left the dock, entering his boat and speeding off to another location, where he hoped he might be able to find more answers. "To BIONICLE-Nui!" he proclaimed, and the boat sped off to the other island.

 

One Batman-style transition with a boat instead of the Bat-symbol later, Lewa0111 and his boat pulled up to the dock at BIONICLE-Nui. This island was even more crowded than BZ-Nui was, although much less well-maintained and mainly rampant with advertising for various BIONICLE and LEGO products, with bridges everywhere connecting it with the other islands of the LEGO Archipegalo. Near the entrance, a short movie was playing advertising the Glatorian, narrated by a narrator with an annoying voice. Display cases featuring the new sets and their features, bios, and stats were arranged neatly in the Museum nearby, next to similar cases featuring older sets, near which hundreds of spectators stood, examining them and passing judgements on whether or not the blue and red axle pins clashed horribly with the rest of the color schemes. Beyond this, there were roads leading to other various places on the island, including the Shopping District and the Bioniclestory Library. Bypassing these, Lewa0111 took the long, twisting, overgrown pathway that spiraled down a steadily declining hillside, leading deep into the underground caverns where the Lego Message Boards resided.

 

He took a deep breath. He always avoided this horrible place if he could help it, as it was rampant with the feared, obnoxious Noobs and Trolls, along with constant Spammers proflierating thanks to the low moderation. However, at the moment he knew he had no choice, and occasionally some brave BZ-Nui residents would venture down here in attempts to restore order. These usually failed, but if there was a chance of running into other BZP members down here, he would have to take it. He descended into the caverns.

 

Immediately he was greeted by the loud, obnoxious sounds of people screaming, the shouting of random words such as "LOLZ!" and "BINOKULERZ" (the latter probably being a misspelling of BIONICLE), and the splats of pies flying everywhere. It was chaos. Moderators holding giant post filters tried to maintain order, but there were so many Noobs, Trolls, and Spammers that they were overwhelmed and gave up trying to filter every single post made. "This is madness," muttered Lewa0111, pushing his way through the crowds and trying to make his way to some other cavern-topics, where hopefully he would find a BZP member or two and escape this insanity.

 

"Madness?" asked a Noob. "What? No! THIS...IS...BINONICKLES!!111!"

 

" :talk2hand: " Lewa0111 emoticonned simply, pushing the Noob out of his way and entering another topic. On the way, he marveled at the fact that he could still use BZ-Nui's emoticons even after being banned. He then DCed at the fact that he could still use BZ-Nui's emoticons even after being banned, so as not to upset the DC Comics people for his deciding to use Marvel exclusively.

 

When he entered the next topic, entitled "DO U LIEK TE MOVIEE??/," he heard someone banging a gavel on a randomly appeared podium and shouting, "Order! We shall have order!"

 

It was a large, massive, gargantuan huge robot that towered over everything. Somehow, despite this, it was managing to hold the small gavel normally. "Redundancy is redundant!" proclaimed the random Matoran from BZ-Nui, who was standing beside him.

 

"Can we all be quiet? What's going on?" demanded the robot. Since he was so big and large, massive and bulky, towering and--okay, you get the idea--no one was going to argue with him, and the topic got quiet at once.

 

"We have found...a PIRATED MOVIE!" proclaimed a noob nearby. He then brought forward a video link that appeared to be a combination of the sneak peeks from BIONICLE.com and Amazon for TLR, all taped together with duct tape and with "PIRATED" in red letters over the top. Someone had also managed to fit an eyepatch and parrot on the movie's cover. "IT SHOULD BE DESTROYED IMMEDIATELY!"

 

"Who is responsible for creating this PIRATED MOVIE?" asked the robot.

 

A Toa of Elements was brought forward. "Elemental Nova is his name," said the noob, "and he is responsible for this PIRATED MOVIE! He must be imprisoned here for life!"

 

"No I didn't!" protested Elemental Nova. "You guys just took a bunch of preview clips and duct taped them together!"

 

"Now then. How do you know this is a PIRATED MOVIE?" asked the robot.

 

"It's got an eyepatch and parrot on it!"

 

"You put that on there!" protested Elemental Nova.

 

"Well...okay, I admit I put that on there," said the noob sheepishly. " :baaa: " he emoticonned. "But still! It's a released version of a movie that won't even be out for almost a year!"

 

"Is it the full movie?"

 

"Well, no, it's only 20 minutes long. But it has clips in it that aren't from BIONICLE-Nui! It must be pirated!"

 

"You got those clips from Amazon-Nui!"

 

"Did you?"

 

"Who cares? It's still pirated!"

 

Lewa0111 sighed. This was all beginning to turn into a very odd Monty Python spoof. "Now, then," said the huge robot, "we need to figure out whether or not this actually is a PIRATED MOVIE. Everyone, what do PIRATED MOVIES do?"

 

"tEy Dsiaplay Slpolixerz!!11" said the noob.

 

"They steel peoples money!" added a Troll. "Money that ought to be spent using my special formula to get rich by investing only 3 Widgets a Day!"

 

"They ruin The Lego Company's sales!"

 

"They pillage and plunder!"

 

"We're talking about PIRATED MOVIES, not pirates," reminded someone else.

 

"They violate the law!"

 

"They insult GregF!"

 

The robot pointed at the noob who had said the last suggestion. "Exactly. Now, then, what else insults GregF?"

 

"Bad color chemes!"

 

"Poor reviesws!"

 

"ppl who dnt liek te name treridax!!111!"

 

"C.A. Hapka's existence," proclaimed Lewa0111, stepping forward.

 

Immediately, a hushed silence fell over the group. "Exactly," said the robot. "So, by that understanding, if this video weighs the same as C.A. Hapka, therefore...?"

 

"A PIRATED MOVIE!"

 

"That...makes...no...sense," Lewa0111 said.

 

A large scale then appeared out of nowhere. The duct-taped video was placed on one side, and C.A. Hapka (who had conveniently appeared out of nowhere), was placed on the other. The side with C.A. Hapka on it tipped down. "Hmm, they don't weigh the same," observed the robot. "Okay, Elemental Nova, you're off the hook."

 

"Wow, and I thought this was going to spoof Monty Python," commented Lewa0111 as the crowd dispersed away. "I'm Lewa0111, by the way. From the way you handled that situation, I'd guess you're a resident of BZ-Nui."

 

"That's right. You can call me -Blackout-."

 

"Blackout?"

 

"No, -Blackout-. The hyphens are important."

 

"Oh, I see. And who's this?" he asked, pointing to the random Matoran who had randomly appeared out of nowhere for no apparent reason randomly.

 

"Redundancy is redundant! Oh, and I'm Vorox Master. I control Vorox, and I also think redundancy is redundant." He paused. "And yes, I know that was also redundant. That's why it's funny. I'm also good with time-comedy warp portals, which explains why you see me appearing randomly whenever I feel like it."

 

"Well, I'm glad to meet you two. Do either of you know anything about what's going on on BZ-Nui?"

 

-Blackout- shook his head. "I haven't been there in a few days. I've been trying to maintain order down here, although it's a losing battle."

 

"Well, I'm not sure either, but something isn't right. I was banned for absolutely no reason at all; I haven't broken any rules, and I went to sleep in my Offline Dormitory and woke up on Google-Nui. I barely escaped a few Advertisements and a Scam with my life, and got back to the island only to find myself banned."

 

"Sounds suspicious," agreed -Blackout-. Then, suddenly, a low rumbling sound began to rumble overhead. "What's that?"

 

"Whatever it is, it was redundant," said Vorox Master.Then, a large tank suddenly crashed through one wall of the cave. On it was the symbol of a beige ferret stabbing Hapori Tohu with a cardboard foam cut-out of a BIONICLE weapon. "Join us, noobs of the Lego Message Boards!" proclaimed a voice from inside. "We are where the real power lies!"

 

"Noobs? We aren't noobs!" shouted Vorox Master. "Vorox, attack!" Several Vorox armed with Applenax Launchers (similar to Thornax Launchers, but these shoot exploding apples instead) appeared out of nowhere and charged at the tank.

 

A laser beam flew out of the tank and zapped the Vorox. "LoLz wAtz up?1/!///??/??????" they said, rolling around, misspelling things, and causing chaos.

 

"No! They've been noobified!"

 

"I'll handle this," said -Blackout-, picking up the tank and chucking it to Pluto. "Wow, that was easy."

 

"I think I've seen that marking before," said Lewa0111. "The Ferrets in Beige. We need to go investigate right away, immediately.""

 

Redundancy is redundant!"

 

TO BE CONTINUED...

 

Next: Something happens!

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 03 2014 - 06:38 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#6 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted Nov 01 2011 - 09:08 AM

Oh, how I remembered this comedy! I've been renamed once in the original story, from Vorox Master to Zeskii. Perhaps you could just tweak the ending script when I was renamed so I would be renamed Festus instead. Still, it's not that important. Just let me laugh back at all the jokes you've posted before, okay.
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It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#7 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Nov 01 2011 - 11:40 PM

@Festus: Sure, no problem. I'll incorporate your most recent name change into the story when I write the first new chapter after the uploads are finished.

 

The next chapter is another one of Gabriella's. Expect her to post sometime tomorrow with the chapter.

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 05 2014 - 03:53 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#8 Offline Toa Gabriella0111

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Posted Nov 02 2011 - 08:46 PM

As promised, here's my next chapter!The BZ-Nui Hack WarsA BIONICLE comedy by Lewa0111!Gabriella Chapter 2: "Ask Mysterious Cloaked Guy!"Gabriella and Mesonak, weapons out, marched their captive back into the Comedies Forum. Luckily, since the Moderators were all otherwise occupied, they failed to attract attention. Finally, they reached the Topic Creator and shoved him into it, jumping in alongside him.Ask Mysterious Cloaked Guy!, MCG: Get me out of here!Gabriella: Hi, this is my first comedy, (well not really) anyway, welcome to "Ask Mysterious Cloaked Guy!" Since this is an 'Ask' comedy, it will therefore be in script and full of low-quality, cliche humor, because as everyone knows, there is no such thing as a good 'Ask' comedy.Mesonak: Obviously no one's ever read Ask Tahu or Ask Matau!.Gabriella: And here's our host, Mysterious Cloaked Guy! Everyone applaud!Random Matoran #35: *claps weakly and gives up*MCG: http://www.bzpower.c...tyle_emoticons/default/mad.gif*The audience starts clapping furiously*MCG: That's better. Now let me out of here.Mesonak: Not until you finish the chapter! It's not 300 words yet!MCG: Who cares? 300 words is for noobs.Mesonak: Don't make me pie you in the face...MCG: Fine. *goes to a mysterious cloaked laptop* How many messages for me, Mysterious Cloaked Laptop?MCL: You have 8278390456797093286512308758726354082t7530872639475u4yt87qwt72638547676259847357938769716560459387696309584780769273645 new messages.MCG: :OMG: #@$&ing Spam! And did I see letters in that number? :blink:MCL: It's a rule that all 'Ask' comedies must have overused spam number cliches.MCG: Fine. Delete all spam.MCL: You have--MCG: And hate mail from Lewa0111 people who hate me.MCL: You--MCG: And threats from Moderators.MCL: You have 9 new messages.MCG: That's better. Display first message. [QUOTE]Mysterious Cloaked Guy,Please read the Ask Comedy Rules And Guidelines before continuing.--Toa Gabriella and Mesonak[/QUOTE]MCG: I don't want to! I'l just escape!*He tries to run away, but is restrained by the leash that Gabriella put on him*MCG: Dang it. Oh well. Fine. [quote name='Ask Comedy Rules And Guidelines]Rules for Ask Comedies:1. You must use computers with ridiculous spam cliches.2. The computers must talk. Also' date=' they must have an appearance similar to something about the host's personality or appearance.3. They must be in script. Who ever heard of a prose 'Ask' comedy, anyway?4. They should be chock full of hate mail and random viruses.5. Each chapter should have no plot whatsoever.[/QUOTE']MCG: Okay, these rules are stupid. Next question. [QUOTE]Dear Mysterious Cloaked Guy,Do you like tacos?--Anonymous[/QUOTE]MCG: This is a dumb question. Oh well, I suppose I won't give anything away about our evil plans by telling you that I hate tacos.Lewa0111: *pops in from nowhere* WHAT!? YOU HATE TACOS!!!!! DIE!!!!Moderator: style_emoticons/default/alert.gif:alert: Banned member! KILL!Lewa0111: style_emoticons/default/ph34r.gif:fear: *runs away*MCG: That was odd. Tacos are dumb. Next question [QUOTE]Mysterious Cloaked Guy,Eat viruses!--Bob the Pirate :pirate:[/QUOTE]MCG: What? No! I don't want to--MMMPH!*spits*MCG: Viruses taste terrible. Next question. [QUOTE]MCG, what do you want? Are there more than one of you?--Signed, Mesonak[/QUOTE]MCG: Our leaders and I want to get revenge on BZP's Administrators by causing chaos and horror among the forums and getting countless members banned for our actions. We love chaos! And yes,there are more than one of--HEY! You won't get me to reveal our secrets that easily!Gabriella: I think you just did reveal your secrets to us. Thanks!MCG: :glare:style_emoticons/default/glare.gif I hate you.Gabriella: Why thank you. Just keep going with the questions. [QUOTE]To: MCGFrom: TavaPIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PIPIEPIPUIPI!!!!!!!!!1!1Pie = 3.14159265358979323! I WUB PIEZ! :br:[/QUOTE]MCG: style_emoticons/default/blink.gif:blink: I hate pie too. This is spam. Mysterious Cloaked Laptop, please delete.MCL: Done! Next question. [QUOTE]To Mysterious Cloaked Guy,Are you and your organization the same ones who impersonated Lewa0111, sent me a threat message, and got Lewa0111 banned? If so, why?--Signed, Mesonak[/QUOTE]MCG: Yes, in fact, we are the same organization--the Ferrets in Beige! The greatest organization with the most horrifically evil name EVER! And as to why, well, it's quite simple: we just...WAIT A MINUTE! NO WAY AM I TELLING YOU!Mesonak: :sly:MCG: What are you emoticonning at, Mesonak?Mesonak: *snickers*MCG: WHAT?Mesonak: Ferrets in Beige...BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!Gabriella: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!MCG: It's not funny... style_emoticons/default/sad.gif:( Next question.Gabriella and Mesonak: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! [QUOTE]Mysterious Cloaked Guy, AKA MCG:What is the square root of applesauce?[/QUOTE]MCG: :blink: How should I know? Next! [QUOTE]MCG,You look like applesauce! I think I'll eat you! OM NOM NOM!~Toa of Applesauce[/QUOTE]MCG: No I don't! And what a dumb power to have anyway.*The Toa of Applesauce bursts into the topic*Toa of Applesauce: OM NOM NOM NOM NOM! *eats MCG*MCG: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo...END TOPICGabriella glanced down at where the Mysterious Cloaked Guy had just been eaten by the Toa of Applesauce owing to the randomness of 'Ask' comedies. "Well," she remarked to Mesonak, "that was interesting, to say the least.""We found out some good information on him, though. It sounds like this is a major issue."Gabriella nodded. "We need to warn the Administrators about what's going on right away. And find a way to contact Lewa0111."Mesonak grinned. "I know how to succeed at the latter, at least--I know a guy. The Toa of Real Life. He can find a way to connect you and Lewa# through use of Real Life."It's worth a try. I just hope we aren't too late.THE ENDNext: Gabriella meets Lewa#--IN REAL LIFE!?ToaG Productions, Inc. (In association with Lewa# Studios)~Toa Gabriella
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My three favorite things are Bionicle, High School Musical, and Lewa0111. Guess what? They're all in one topic! Or, visit my comedy: The Story of Toa Gabriella
Hey, I'm a Toa--a Toa of Music, that is! But hang on, wasn't I a Turaga before? Something seems backwards...


Are you a fan of any or all of Lewa0111's comedies? Then please, help me with making a wiki for them! Just search "Lewa0111 Comedy Wiki" on any search engine to find it (since I can't link to sites with forums!) Thanks a ton! ^_^

#9 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted Nov 02 2011 - 10:53 PM

@Festus: Sure, no problem. I'll incorporate your most recent name change into the story when I write the first new chapter after the uploads are finished.The next chapter is another one of Gabriella's. Expect her to post sometime tomorrow with the chapter. :mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:

Actually, there was this part in the story (one of Toa Gabriella's chapters) that changed my name from VM to Zeskii. I'm just asking if you could change it so it changed from VM to Festus instead.

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It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#10 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Nov 03 2011 - 12:18 PM

@Festus: Ah, I see. In that case, I'll talk to Gabriella and ask her to change it in her chapter. No problem!

 

THE BZ-NUI HACK WARS

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 5: The Front

 

"Where are we going?" Lewa0111 asked -Blackout-. The two of them, along with Vorox Master, were traveling in a hyperlink boat away from the Lego Message Boards after narrowly escaping a horde of spammers. On the horizon, a large, beige island rose up from the sea.

 

"Up ahead, right in front of us, and in our path," explained -Blackout,- "is a strange Island of Forums that appeared only recently. As soon as I saw that symbol on the tank that attacked us in the previous chapter, in Chapter 4, the chapter before this one, I figured that it must have some connection to the Ferrets in Beige you mentioned."

 

"Redundancy is redundant!" pointed out Vorox Master. "It doesn't seem to be very populated, at least, not last time I checked. But you never know."

 

"Well, it's worth a try. Especially considering that I have no way of getting back onto BZ-Nui at the moment."

 

Before long, the boat had arrived on the shore of the strange, nearly empty island. A single Forum Tower dominated the landscape, as quiet as the rest of the island. The beach featured the logo of a badly drawn ferret stabbing an equally badly-drawn cardboard cut-out of Hapori Tohu, identical to the one on the tank from Chapter 4. The three BZ-Nuians looked around at their bleak surroundings.

 

Vorox Master nodded toward the Forum Tower. "Well, it's worth a try, I suppose," he said. "I mean, what else is there to investigate?"

 

Lewa0111 and -Blackout-, seeing no other available options, agreed to this. The three of them walked toward the tower and opened the door, entering. Inside, two mysterious cloaked guys who resembled the MCG from Gabriella's chapters immediately blocked their path. "State your business," said Random MCG #1, in a surprisingly accurate impersonation of Metus from TLR, complete with a randomly appeared Vorox tail.

 

"Just a traveler, looking for the nearest--OUCH!" Vorox Master began, before -Blackout- smacked him upside the head for attempting to continue quoting TLR.

 

"Are you here to register for the...umm...Furrets out of Black?" asked MCG #2, apparently oblivious to the fact that not only is Furret a Pokemon and not a real animal, but that his made-up title was obviously a disguise for the Ferrets in Beige. His companion also smacked him upside the head for this entirely unoriginal name.

 

"Er, yes," said Lewa0111 before they could be questioned further. "We're here to create accounts."

 

"We don't get many new members," said MCG #1 suspiciously. "You aren't spies from BZ-Nui, are you?"

 

"If we were spies, would we walk through the front door?"

 

MCG #1 considered this. "Good point," he agreed finally. "Here's the signup form. All you need is a valid name, age, zip code, username, e-mail address, and flavor of cheese, and you can be signed into the forums immediately." He passed them each a large stack of papers. "Oh, and you also have to fill out a bunch of other stuff for the promotional survey we're running at the moment. But don't worry, it shouldn't take you that long. Come back here when you're finished."

 

The three BZ-Nuians, having no other option, agreed and left the tower. Once outside, they looked at their packets. "Let's see..." began Lewa0111. "Well, obviously we can't give them our real, accurate, authentic, valid names, so we'll just have to make some up."

 

"Redundancy is redundant! And that's a good idea. I think my name will be...umm...Zesk Servant."

 

"That's too obvious," interrupted -Blackout-. "I'm not going to go with anything dumb like ~Whitein~. Instead, I will choose 'Icky-Icky Lavalampman Handlebar Mustachio The Second!'"

 

" :blink: " emoticonned Lewa0111. "Good luck remembering that. I'll just put mine down as...umm..." He looked around at his surroundings. The first thing he noticed was a cluster of Bread Bushes (in the Internet, bread grows on bushes!). Then he spotted a banana tree, the staircase leading up to the Forum Tower's door, and Vorox Master's Kanohi mask. "Bread Bananastaircasemask! It's perfect!"

 

"Let me guess, you just went with the first four things you spotted?"

 

"Kind of..."

 

"Right, anyway, next question. A valid age? What kind of question is that? What kind of age is invalid, anyway?" asked -Blackout.-

 

"I'll put down '99,' said Vorox Master.

 

"Negative 26 seems like an okay age," said Lewa0111 with a :D.

 

"And I'm a robot, so my real age is 40 billion. But I don't want to put my real age, so I'll just say '2.' Okay, next question is zip code. How about 01011? That's my name in binary! Or maybe I just made that up."

 

"123456!" put in Vorox Master.

 

"Six numbers? For a zip code? Remind me never again to go undercover with you," said -Blackout.-

 

"And I just put 26359. Five completely random numbers."

 

 

 

...Several hours later...

 

 

 

"Finally!" exclaimed Lewa0111. "Now we can get into that tower."

 

The three of them took their now-completed packets of entirely useless and made-up information and entered the Forum Tower. The same two MCGs stopped them at the entryway, complete with TLR quote, but this time, they presented them with the packets. MCG #1 took them and looked first at -Blackout-'s:

 

Name: Icky-Icky Lavalampman Handlebar Mustachio the Second

Age: 2

Zip Code: 01011

Username: RockinRobot341

E-mail Address: FiBsux@rewopzb.com

Flavor of Cheese: Swiss

Favorite Species of Whale: Beluga

1+1: 2

What is love?: A heart

How many talking chickens do you own?: 3

Do any of them play the oboe?: No

No?: Yes

Yes?: No

Dog?: Green Eggs and Ham

Height: 40 billion feet

Weight: 1 lb

Shoe size: 3.14

Pie or Pi?: Pi

Is this a question?: Umm...maybe?

Snooping as usual, I see?: 8

 

"People these days and their wacky names," muttered MCG #1. "Everything looks to be in order here. You can go through." He waved -Blackout- through, as he next looked at Vorox Master's form:

 

Name: Zesk Servant

Age: 99

Zip Code: 123456

Username: RedundantRedundant2222

E-mail Address: vmaster@rewopzb.com

Flavor of Cheese: Cheddar

Favorite Species of Whale: Grey

1+1: 11

What is love?: 'evoL' backwards

How many talking chickens do you own?: 500

Do any of them play the oboe?: Most of them

No?: Maybe

Yes?: Not really

Dog?: Cat?

Height: 5'8"

Weight: 42 lbs

Shoe size: 17.5

Pie or Pi?: Pie

Is this a question?: Yes, it's got a question mark after it!

Snooping as usual, I see?: Umm, what?

 

"Hmm..." muttered MCG #1. "It seems a bit uninspired. Are you sure that's actually your favorite flavor of cheese?"

 

"Umm, yes?" answered Vorox Master.

 

"I doubt it. Cheddar is the obvious answer. No one REALLY likes cheddar cheese! Take him in for further questioning. We'll get to the bottom of this."

 

As MCG #2 grabbed Vorox Master roughly by the shoulders and began to haul him deep into the building, MCG #1 turned his attention back to Lewa0111, who was about to help his friend if -Blackout- was not holding him in place. "And you? Will you check out as valid?" He looked at Lewa0111's form:

 

Name: Bread Bananastaircasemask

Age: -26

Zip Code: 26359

Username: TheBannedOne

E-mail Address: randomman@rewopzb.com

Flavor of Cheese: American

Favorite Species of Whale: Orca

1+1: Window

What is love?: Baby don't hurt me/Don't hurt me/No more (Dadadada dadadada)

How many talking chickens do you own?: None

Do any of them play the oboe?: N/A

No?: False

Yes?: True

Dog?: God

Height: 7'0"

Weight: 470 lbs

Shoe size: 14

Pie or Pi?: Tava

Is this a question?: No

Snooping as usual, I see?: No

 

"Surprisingly, you pass as well," MCG #1 said to Lewa0111, who sighed in relief. "That Zesk Servant wasn't a friend of yours, was he?"

 

"No, we just happened to arrive at the same time," said -Blackout-.

 

"Good. Then you're free to proceed. Have a nice day." MCG #1 stepped aside, allowing Lewa0111 and -Blackout- to enter. Vorox Master was already nowhere to be found.

 

Lewa0111 looked around hoping for a sign of his missing friend. "Now what?" he asked -Blackout.-

 

"We try to find out as much as we can here. And find Vorox Master."

 

"Good idea. But where to start?"

 

"It doesn't seem like there's much here; I'm guessing since this place wasn't exactly hard to find, this isn't their real hideout. It must be a front for their organization."

 

"The Ferrets in Beige, obviously. Luckily, they aren't very good at thinking up good alibis."

 

"And neither is Vorox Master. I'm guessing there's a hidden link somewhere that links directly to their actual hideout, which is probably where they've taken him."

 

"Good idea. Let's go into the forums and see if we can't tease it out of any loose-lipped "Furrets out of Black" members."

 

Together, they entered a link taking them to the "Welcome" forum.

 

TO BE CONTINUED...

 

Next: Bad timing! Real Life! And stuff!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 05 2014 - 04:17 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#11 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted Nov 03 2011 - 07:15 PM

Oh, yes. I remember this chapter well! It's one of my favourites, see. I guess it's because of the fake signup forms, always a good laugh. I wonder where the rest of your readers ran off to, though.
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It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#12 Offline Darth Jaller

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Posted Nov 06 2011 - 03:38 PM

I can't believe I never read this before. This comedy is wonderful! In fact it's so good, I'm a bit at a loss for anything else to say about it right now XD I love the entire concept of this one ^^...seems I broke the rules of Ask Comedies numerous times in the past, though... :lookaround: Especially the script one XP

Edited by Darth Jaller, Nov 06 2011 - 03:39 PM.

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#13 Offline Toa Gabriella0111

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Posted Nov 09 2011 - 10:14 AM

Hi, Darth Jaller! Glad to have a new fan of this comedy here...anyway, next chapter's mine, so here it is!THE BZ-NUI HACK WARSA BIONICLE comedy by Lewa0111!Gabriella Chapter 3: Talk About Inconvenient Timing OR The Toa of...Real Life!?"By the way, I love exclamation points and question marks together!" exclaimed Pohatu, randomly jumping into the title booth.Photok blasted him with light and shoved him out of the booth. "DON'T USE THAT JOKE!!"Then, the Toa of Lawyers appeared. "That joke is copyrighted by Lewa0111! You can't use it!" he protested with an http://www.bzpower.c...tyle_emoticons/default/mad.gif, before I reminded him that since this is a Lewa0111 comedy, I can use his jokes all I want. Disappointed, he vanished, followed by an equally disappointed Keetongu. And now back to the actual chapter."Where are we going?" asked Gabriella. Mesonak had been leading her all the way to the western edge of BZ-Nui, far from the Comedies forum, and much farther than she had ever traveled on the island before. BZ-Nui was vast, and very few members had ever spent much time in all of its forums and sub-forums. On the way, they passed the home page, noticing a newsstand advertising the spoiler policy concerning leaked images of the Glatorian, right next to a random Matoran selling the Glatorian sets themselves, which had been released in stores worldwide for a month already. Strangely, no one commented on the redundancy of the situation."You'll see," said Mesonak. Before long, the two of them had entered a large archway with the title "NON-BIONICLE FORUMS" in capital letters across it. "If you're looking for a Toa who controls dimensions, like this one, you need to go somewhere where the border between Real Life and the Internet is already weakened. It would stink to be him, in my opinion. He can't leave this forum, but at least he has the power to get you where you need to go."Gabriella looked around at the mass of topics, most of which were "Official" and upwards of 200 pages long. She passed an "Official Pokemon Topic," "Official Mario Topic," "Official Neopets Topic," "Official Pictures Topic," "Official Australia Topic," "Official Island Topic," and "Official Topic Topic." Spotting an "Official High School Musical Topic," she pulled away to go inside, but Mesonak grabbed her arm and pulled her away. "Oh, right," she said reluctantly. "We have a job to do."Five seconds later they passed the "Official HSM 2 Topic."Several hours later, they had finally made it to "The ToRL's Official Dimensional Service Topic," with Mesonak's arm getting sore after having to drag Gabriella away from the "Official HSM2," "Official HSM3," "Official HSM4 Speculation," "Official HSM5000.312," and countless other similar topics. "Well, about time," he muttered, gazing up at the entrance to the topic before them. "We're here."They stepped inside the link to the topic. There, they were greeted with a large welcome screen with a prominent banner featuring a picture of the Toa of Real Life. Behind the banner, the actual Toa of Real Life sat on a plush armchair. He was a tan-and-Mata-blue Toa Newva wearing (naturally) a tan Olmak. In one hand he held a large magnifying glass and his other hand clutched a GENERICALLY STANDARD REQUISITE LAUNCHER. "And you are?" he asked the two upon their entry."I'm Mesonak - The Shadow Warlord, and this is Toa Gabriella: Toa of Music," Mesonak introduced. "We need some help. One of our friends was banned and his account taken over by an impostor, claiming to be from an organization dedicated to ruining BZ-Nui forever. The Ferrets in Beige. Have you heard of them?""Can't say I have. You're sure he wasn't banned on purpose? Helping banned members is a major crime these days."Gabriella rolled her eyes. "Do we look like criminals to you? He's a good friend and a well-known member. He would never do anything to get himself banned. We need your help.""Help, huh? I might be able to do something for you. But I'm gonna want something in return. I want out of this dump. You have to take me with you," said Kiina." http://www.bzpower.c...tyle_emoticons/default/blush.png " emoticonned the ToRL. "Whoops. I forgot I left that on." He then pulled out a remote control and hit "Pause," pausing the DVD player behind him that had been playing BIONICLE: The Legend Reborn. He then turned his attention back to Gabriella and Mesonak. "If you're sure he's been wronged," he told them, "then I'd be able to help you, but I don't work for free.""Payment?" offered Mesonak. "We have plenty of Guest Star positions, even a PGS position, available in our comedies, and of course we'd be willing to vote as many times as possible in any BZP contests..."" :uhuh: " came the reply. "Nothing like that. If I'm sending you to Real Life, I want something back. Lewa0111 has two Onua Mirus. In return, I want one of them.""How do you know he has them?" asked Gabriella. "What if he doesn't?"The ToRL gestured to his Kanohi. "I'm the Toa of Real Life! Of course I know what kind of Kanohi Lewa0111's real life version has!""Well, I suppose it's worth a try, then," said Mesonak. "Gabriella?"She considered for only a moment before replying. "Deal.""Great. Good luck, Gabriella. I'll be waiting here.""Mesonak, you're not coming?""Nah. We need someone on the inside we can trust. I'll still be able to send you PM's from here, and I'll be able to let you know if any new developments arise."Gabriella shrugged. "I guess that makes sense," she admitted reluctantly. "Okay, what do I do now?""Nothing," the ToRL answered. "Just stand still." She complied, and the Toa of Real Life placed his magnifying glass's lens in between her and his Olmak, and focused....Meanwhile, in the poorly-disguised forums that were actually a front for the Ferrets in Beige, Lewa0111 and -Blackout-, or Bread Bananastaircasemask and Icky-Icky Lavalampman Handlebar Mustachio The Second as they were known to the adminstrators of the Forum Tower, were rifling through past forum posts. "Why do I need this?" asked Lewa0111, tossing aside the rifle. They had been looking through information for the better part of a day, and could tell that they were getting close to unearthing vital information about the location of the FiB's actual headquarters.Then, suddenly, alarms began to blare all throughout the tower. Armed guards, most of whom looked like large human men in ferret costumes, began to surround them. -Blackout- readied his weapons, and at the sight of his intimidating form, the guards slunk back. "I'll distract them," he whispered to Lewa0111. "You go and find Vorox Master. We know how to get there now.""Right," Lewa0111 said. Then, suddenly, a bright tannish-blue light began to surround him. Within moments, he was gone."You've got to be kidding me," groaned -Blackout.-THE END ToaG Productions, Inc. (In association with Lewa# Studios)~Toa Gabriella~
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My three favorite things are Bionicle, High School Musical, and Lewa0111. Guess what? They're all in one topic! Or, visit my comedy: The Story of Toa Gabriella
Hey, I'm a Toa--a Toa of Music, that is! But hang on, wasn't I a Turaga before? Something seems backwards...


Are you a fan of any or all of Lewa0111's comedies? Then please, help me with making a wiki for them! Just search "Lewa0111 Comedy Wiki" on any search engine to find it (since I can't link to sites with forums!) Thanks a ton! ^_^

#14 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Nov 17 2011 - 12:13 AM

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 6: The Mandatory Villain Chapter

 

" :fear: " emoticonned -Blackout-, after Lewa0111 had inconveniently disappeared. "Umm...bye?" He then teleported away, in order to think of a new plan that didn't revolve around Lewa0111 not disappearing at bad times.

 

"He's gone..." said Henchman #4, disappointed. "Oh well. Let's go report back to The Bawsz."

 

"Fine," agreed Henchman #17. The other henchmen followed them through the corridors of the base. Finally, they reached The Bawsz's profile, which was hidden beneath a massive wall of Pop-Up Windows, Survey Scams, and Obnoxious Video Ads.

 

"Swordfish," said Henchman #4. Since the password is always swordfish, the wall opened, revealing a straight path to The Bawsz's profile. "Let's go."

 

"You go. We'll wait here and...umm...guard...stuff," said Henchman #17.

 

"Stuff? What kind of stuff?"

 

"Umm...that dust bunny...down there. It's a very important dust bunny."

 

"Really... said Henchman #5. "Why is it so important?"

 

"Because!" stammered Henchman #17. "It's...the...Chosen Dust Bunny! The one...that...umm...brings light to...the...something...and...umm...yeah..."

 

"Fine. I'll go talk to The Bawsz myself." With that, Henchman #5 walked into The Bawsz's profile, leaving the others to guard the 'Chosen Dust Bunny.'

 

Henchman #5 entered The Bawsz's profile, where the shadowy, mysterious figure wearing a beige ferret costume was seated behind a jet black desk. "Enter," seethed The Bawsz, in a deep, dark, hissing voice that sounded basically like what everyone immediately thinks of when they think of an evil villain's voice.

 

"Umm, I already did that. This is the part where you say "Report.""

 

"Oh, sorry. Report," corrected The Bawsz.

 

"Zesk Servant has been successfully captured. Bread Bananastaircasemask disappeared from existence for no apparent reason, and I doubt that he will be a threat. Icky-Icky Lavalampman Handlebar Mustachio The Second teleported out of the building. I can only assume that he will try to infiltrate once more."

 

"Well done. Excellent. Place their profiles on the Permanently Banned list. Have you been able to link them to BZ-Nui in any way?"

 

"No, sir. We've checked their list of members, and there was no Zesk Servant, Bread Bananastaircasemask, or Icky-Icky Lavalampman Handlebar Mustachio The Second to be found. I think they may just be wanderers who have stumbled upon this place by accident."

 

"Perhaps they used false identities."

 

"Oh, please. Who does that nowadays? Everyone knows that's the easiest and oldest trick in the book, which is why no one in their right mind would actually do that anymore. I assure you, they will no longer be a threat."

 

"Well done. Excellent. Carry on with our vaguely established evil plan to do something evil. I will remain in my profile, doing evil things. Is that all, then?"

 

"The rest of my henchmen are outside. Henchman #17 informed me that they have discovered that the Chosen Dust Bunny, which will 'bring light to the something,' was hidden inside our base. They are now guarding it dilligently."

 

"Well done. Excellent. I'll have to give him a promotion for his excellent foresight and grasp of tactics."

 

" :huh: " emoticonned Henchman #5. "I'll just go now." He turned and left the room.

 

When he had gone, The Bawsz activated his evil computer, checking over his evil databases and evil Web sites and E(vil)-mail. When he had finished with this, he opened his evil word processor and typed an evil letter to his evil mom, complimenting her on the evil cookies that she had sent him the previous week and asking her to send him some evil money to help him with his evil plot. When he had finished printing this on his evil printer, he sent the letter in his evil mailbox and then played some evil solitaire for a while. After losing 122 times in a row, he turned around and stared out of his evil window at the evil island that he had evilly had built for him by FreeWebs-Nui. As he stared, he began to have an evil flashback.

 

 

 

FLACKBACK!

 

 

 

Ignoring the fact that the writer had spelled 'Flashback' wrong, The Bawsz remembered a time when he had not been so evil. He had been a child of 452 years when he had found himself abandoned on the island of BZ-Nui, then still the two separate islands of KanohiPowerland and BZone-Nui. The kind people of KanohiPowerland had adopted him, giving him a profile, a membership, and a name: Awe Bzhst. They had been nothing but kind to him, allowing him to stay there forever, and giving him all he had ever wanted.

 

But then he grew older, and as a teenager, he was stereotypically rebellious and rude to everyone. This caused them to be defensive and slightly less kind in return, until eventually, he decided he wanted to post a comedy for some reason. He posted this comedy, but it was only 299 words long. This was an unpardonable crime in those days, so the topic was not only locked, but erased forever, and he found himself banned, having done nothing wrong except break the word filter at least seven hundred times in each of his sixty letters to the various moderators. He had also started three separate flame wars, started an alternate account called 'king at the sok factoree' with which to spam up the forums with unintelligible gibberish, and posted hundreds of insulting topics and comments, but that was all done in fun. The 299-word comedy, however, was the thing that had gotten himself banned in the first place. He left the island forever, eventually finding his real parents, and vowing revenge on the Comedies Forum forever.

 

Despite this, he had not really done anything, per se, to progress on his revenge. That all changed when one day, he opened his alternate account to enter BZ-Nui and the Comedies Forum once more. He had only intended to see how much things had changed, but what he saw changed him instead. A very popular author had emerged onto the forums, one who had written dozens of comedies, almost all of which had attained constant praise and acclamation, without even breaking a single rule. Indeed, the member in question had even gained a Proto Point for submitting a news article, and had not broken any rules whatsoever, not even insulting the moderators! This member's name was Lewa0111. Awe Bzhst knew that he had to destroy and defame this rising star, and the only way to do that would be to force him to become banned.

 

For that, Awe Bzhst needed much more. He comissioned his island base and hired a bunch of randomly-numbered henchmen to assist him. He also changed his name, to something that sounded slightly more evil than his original one: The Bawsz. And then he had succeeded. Lewa0111 had finally become banned...somehow, he wasn't quite sure how: the flashback apparently left out that part.

 

 

 

END FLACKBACK!

 

 

 

Again, he ignored the typo in the above sentence. The Bawsz's next phase in the plan was going perfectly: soon, not just the Comedies Forum, but all of BZ-Nui would have to surrender and bow before their new master: he, The Bawsz, would become the new Great Admin. " :evilgrin: " he emoticonned, as he headed downstairs to make himself some evil toast in his evil kitchen.

 

He would really have to give Henchman #17 a raise.

 

Next: Stuff! More stuff! And other stuff!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 05 2014 - 04:24 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#15 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Nov 18 2011 - 12:08 AM

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 7: The Insanity of "Real Life"

 

"Ow," groaned Lewa0111 shortly after he had materialized in the dimension of Real Life...upside-down and floating in midair 50 feet above the ground. He clambered to his feet and looked around. "Where am I? Is this some new attack?"

 

He heard a voice laughing from behind him. He turned around to see that the voice in question belonged to a short girl with curly brown hair standing nearby. "Of course not," she said. "It's me, Gabriella. By the way, my real name is--" As she said her real name, a conveniently placed jet plane flew very low to the ground, drowning out her words.

 

"It's nice to meet you, --" As he said her name, a semi truck drove past, despite the fact that there were no roads. "My real name is--" A foghorn blew from out of nowhere.

 

"This is getting kind of annoying with all of these conveniently placed objects appearing to keep us from revealing our real names on BZP," the girl pointed out. "Why don't we just use our usernames to refer to each other? It would be easier."

 

"Good point," agreed Lewa0111. "So, where are we, Gabriella?"

 

"We're in Real Life. Mesonak and I were trying to find a way to get in touch with you, and so we found the Toa of Real Life in COT who was willing to transport us here to talk. We can go back to wherever we were before anytime. The only payment in return that he wants is one of your Onua Mirus. Apparently you have two."

 

" :blink: " emoticonned Lewa0111. "How did he know?"

 

"He's the Toa of Real Life. Duh."

 

Lewa0111 shrugged. "Good point. So what exactly has been going on in BZ-Nui? I just woke up one day and found that I couldn't get into the gates."

 

"You were banned."

 

"Thanks, Captain Obvious."

 

"You're welcome!" said Captain Obvious, who was randomly standing behind him, before flying away.

 

The two BZP members stared after him. " :blink: " Gabriella emoticonned. "Anyway, why don't we sit down. There's been something very strange going on lately. Apparently an organization called the Ferrets in Beige is trying to do evil stuff. We found a Mysterious Cloaked Guy on your profile impersonating you, but Mesonak and I managed to defeat and interrogate him by shoving him into an "Ask" comedy. He told us their name and the fact that there are many of them, but he wasn't too clear on the details about what they are planning to do--I get the feeling there isn't a real plan involved."

 

"That checks out with what I've discovered. I went to the Lego Message Boards--"

 

"And you're still alive!?!?!?" exclaimed Gabriella. "Wow." She shoved Pohatu back into his time-comedy warp portal before he could say his line.

 

"That's not the point. I went there and met up with two other BZP members: Vorox Master and -Blackout-. The three of us went to a new Forum Tower on an island, the headquarters of an organization apparently called the "Furrets out of Black," obviously a front. We snuck in, but Vorox Master was captured. -Blackout- and I were fighting our way out when you inconveniently teleported me away."

 

"Sorry," said Gabriella sheepishly. " :baaa: "

 

Lewa0111 shrugged. "It's not important. Anyway, we need to find out more information. I can't exactly do much at the moment since I've been banned, and everyone who'd be willing to help me are BZP members themselves. Do you think you could organize some kind of group to try and convince one of the Great Admins to repeal my banishment? Once I can get online, I can help drive the Ferrets in Beige out of BZP forever."

 

"That sounds like a plan. Well, at least there we're one up on the FiB--they don't seem to have any sort of plan other than just being vaguely evil. I can already think of a few members who'll help: myself and Mesonak, of course, plus Vakama Montana, -Blackout-, Neelh, Takuma Nuva, maybe even Gerlicky. But what will you do while we're trying to unban you?"

 

"I hadn't really thought of that. I suppose I'll just spend my time going around to different islands and having randomly hilarious adventures."

 

"Great! Well, it's time to go back now. Do you have that Onua Miru?"

 

Lewa0111 slapped his forehead. "I forgot about that! And we need a facepalm emoticon."

 

"Yeah, I know. Let's find your house."

 

* * *

 

"I love those transitions," Mesonak said as Gabriella warped back into existence inside The ToRL's Official Dimensional Service Topic. "Oh, hi there. How'd it go?"

 

"Fine." She held out her hand, inside which was the promised Onua Miru. "Sorry about this, something went weird with the transit and the mask got zapped inside my hand. It's kinda painful."

 

The ToRL looked at it. "Whoops, my bad." One application of Olmak power later, the Miru had been moved from inside her hand to on it. "I'll take that, thanks! Glad I could help." He then turned his attention to the next customer as Gabriella and Mesonak left the topic.

 

 

 

"So, tell me more about what you've found out," Mesonak said as they walked through the CoT forums.

 

"Well," she answered, "it was pretty much just like we expected--he just woke up one morning and found himself banned. Apparently he went to the Lego Message boards and returned...yeah, I know," she added at Mesonak's stunned expression, "and he and two other BZP members discovered an important--OMG OFFICIAL HSM5 TOPIC MUSTGOMUSTGOMUSTGO!! :happydance: " she shrieked suddenly as she ran off toward the topic in question.

 

Mesonak stared after her, exasperated. "But the fourth isn't even out yet!" he protested as he reluctantly ran after her. This would take a while.

 

Next: A much longer chapter, I promise! The group is formed! Plans are created...well, sorta!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Jul 05 2014 - 04:40 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#16 Offline Elrond of Rivendell

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Posted Nov 30 2011 - 10:20 PM

The plot thickens!!!! Since I never read this comedy (I wasn't a member until recently) I wonder how it's going to end??-The Bane!!!! :updown:
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Gentlemen, it's time to spread the word. And the word is: Panic

 

life is not a question of how long we live, but what we do with the life we have



BZRPG profiles


#17 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Nov 30 2011 - 10:55 PM

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 8: The BZ-Nui Justice League, uh...Lewa0111's Angles, I mean...Mongeese in Teal, no, wait...BanBusters...Look, just pick a name already!

 

Mesonak could safely say that this was the first time in his life he had spent an entire session on BZ-Nui doing nothing but using his BZ-Nui Personal Messenger System. No, wait, his mistake: it was the second time in his life. It was better not to think about the first, which was a result of an event that had involved several Krana, a dishwasher, and copious amounts of orange juice. This time, however, he was sending Personal Messages to everyone he knew on BZ-Nui, telling them the situation and asking for their help. Beside him, Gabriella was doing the same. All of their messages ended with the same request: "Meet us at Lewa0111's Profile in one hour." It was a reasonable enough request: meeting in person would be the best way to explain everything and begin formulating a plan to rescue Lewa0111 from his horrific fate of being banned. Then Mesonak realized something.They had sent the first few PM's asking the recipients to meet them in one hour...an hour ago.

 

 

* * *

 

 

One haphazard sprint to Lewa0111's Profile later, Gabriella and Mesonak arrived, out of breath, as they looked around at the assembled crowd. Most of the members there were people they recognized: Alaki, -Blackout-, Gerlicky, ibrow, Jovan2, Neelh, Vakama Montana, and Valkor the Valiant. There were also several random Matoran that no one really cares about and who will never again be mentioned in this comedy. Mesonak shook his head. He knew he was going insane when he started putting people in alphabetical order in his mind. Then again, he had never been sane to begin with. "Well, uh, hi everyone," he said to the assembled members. "I'm Mesonak. I'm guessing you all got our PM and came here to help."

 

"I just wanted free food," said one of the random Mator--HEY, I thought we weren't mentioning them ever again! It hasn't even been ten sentences yet! Geez.

 

"Uh...yeah, okay, whatever," Mesonak continued. "Anyway, MOST of you are here to help Lewa0111, so here's the situation. There's an evil group of evil people doing evil things as part of their evil plan to evilly get Lewa0111 evil banned."

 

Gerlicky raised his hand. "Excuse me," he asked, "but are you by any chance channeling Paragraph 23 of Chapter 6?"

 

"No breaking the fourth wall," Mesonak answered back. "Anyway...Gabriella, you're a better speaker than me, why don't you give it a try?"

 

Gabriella stepped up to the conveniently placed podium. When she had finished, the situation had been explained in a much better way than previously. "So," she said to the assembled BZ-Nui members, "what do you think we should do first? We've got the beginnings of an organization, so..."

 

Everyone started talking at once. Alaki, who had had the foresight to be carrying around a rather large megaphone at all times for whatever reason, was the loudest. "We should make a name for ourselves."

 

"Good idea," Mesonak agreed. "We could start by doing something incredibly heroic, and getting everyone to notice us, and then scaring off the FiB through pure intimidation. Great tactic!"

 

" :uhuh: " Alaki emoticonned. "I meant literally. As in, our organization needs a name. We can't just call it "The Large Disorganized Group Of Various BZ-Nui Members Working Toward The Goal Of Un-Banning Lewa0111 And Driving Out The Ferrets In Beige," now can we?"

 

"Or TLDGOVBNMWTTGOUBLADOTFIB, for short."

 

"Whatever. Anyway, anyone have any ideas for a name that doesn't involve a ridiculously long acronym that even Smeaju would have trouble using?"

 

There was silence for a while. Then, Vakama Montana raised his hand to break the silence. However, this failed, as raising a hand does not create sound, and therefore cannot break silences. It was Gabriella who actually broke the silence by calling on him. "Yes?"

 

"How about "The BZ-Nui Justice League?" I mean, it fits: we're a group of BZ-Nui members, and we're fighting for justice, and 'league' sounds cooler than 'group.'"

 

"You got that by reading the title, didn't you. Anyway, it's too cliche," protested Neelh. "I say we call ourselves 'Lewa0111's Angels,' since we're fighting on Lewa0111's behalf. We should have his name in the title."

 

"But most of us aren't girls," -Blackout- pointed out. "And most of us aren't humans, either." His massive robot body made that point clear.

 

"Fine. Then let's make a typo and call ourselves 'Lewa0111's Angles!' Since we're all biomechanical on BZ-Nui, that fits, because our armor is sharp and angled."

 

"OBJECTION!" phoenix wrighted Valkor. (Yes, I just made "Phoenix Wrighted" a verb. So there). "'Lewa0111's Angles' is the stupidest name ever. It isn't cool or intimidating."

 

Neelh sighed. "I suppose you have a better idea, then?" she taunted.

 

"As a matter of fact, I do. We're fighting against a group called the 'Ferrets in Beige,' and what eats ferrets? Mongi! And what color isn't beige? Teal!"

 

"What's a 'mongi?'" asked Alaki, speaking through the same megaphone from earlier. Mesonak, who was unfortunate enough to be standing right in front of it, covered his ears.

 

"Plural of 'mongoose.'"

 

"No, it's 'mongooses.'"

 

"Silly Alaki! Everyone knows the plural of 'mongoose' is 'mongeese.'"

 

"Okay, fine. 'Mongeese in Teal.' Happy?"

 

"Um, no," Gabriella said. "Two reasons: A) it just sounds ridiculous, and B-) we don't want to associate ourselves with the thing we're fighting against."

 

Takuma raised his hand. "Why are you wearing sunglasses?"

 

"Whoops, my mistake," Gabriella said as she pulled off the sunglasses. "I always forget trying to make lists like that makes sunglasses appear. Silly BZ-Nui physics..."

 

"Well, anyway," Takuma continued, "I have an idea. I got it from my own comedy, Toast Busters...since we're a group dedicated to undoing Lewa0111's ban, I vote we call ourselves the 'Ban Busters!' We would even have our own theme song! "Who ya gonna call? Ban Busters!""

 

"But what if Lewa0111 wants to make a comedy about these events someday? Then he'd get accused of plagiarizing you, since it's very similar to your copyrighted comedy, "Toast Busters©."

 

"Bad move," muttered Mesonak as a very angry one-eyed yellow Rahi jumped through a time-comedy warp portal and started chasing after Gabriella, as he has copyrights copyrighted.

 

Neelh smiled. "It's good to know that even with Lewa0111 gone, his jokes live on. Randomness is the spice of life, after all."

 

"Mah boi, this randomness is what all true members strive FOR!" said ShadowBionics, who had, in fact, been there all along but had been completely forgotten by the author up until this very moment.

 

"...I'm not a BOI..." Neelh said with an :unsure:.

 

"That's it!" Gabriella exclaimed, after finally stuffing Keetongu back into his time-comedy warp portal. "What does Lewa0111 represent? Randomness done well. And that is the soul of the Comedies Forum! Take that away, and we get stuck with badly done randomness, which just leads to the decline of our fair forums. So we shall call ourselves...the RANDOMNESS WARRIORS!" Conveniently placed thunder rumbled in the background as she said this. Remarkably, not one single member phoenix wrighted to this statement. "Well, then, Randomness Warriors it is."

 

None of the newly-christened Randomness Warriors noticed the Slightly Less Mysterious Cloaked Guy spying on them from the ceiling as they filed out of the profile, happy with their new name and the beginnings of their quest.

 

Next: The RW actually do something for once!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Aug 08 2014 - 12:06 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#18 Offline Jovan2

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Posted Dec 01 2011 - 03:06 PM

"You got that by reading the title, didn't you. Anyway, it's too cliche," protested Neelh. "I say we call ourselves 'Lewa0111's Angels,' since we're fighting on Lewa0111's behalf. We should have his name in the title.""But most of us aren't girls," -Blackout- pointed out. "And most of us aren't humans, either." His massive robot body made that point clear.

Actually, angels aren't human, and they weren't girls until the Victorian era.Anyways...LET'S GO DO SOMETHING!

Edited by Jovan2, Dec 01 2011 - 03:19 PM.

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#19 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted Dec 02 2011 - 09:11 AM

I think this is where I stopped reading. Nice, this was also the chapter where I was supposed to have the name change >_< Oh well, maybe my memory is just terrible. It's still good, going strong.
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It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#20 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Dec 04 2011 - 12:13 AM

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 9: Bought It On E-Bay

 

It was another beautiful morning inside the Forum Tower of the "Ferrets in Beige." Despite Icky-Icky Lavalampman Handlebar Mustachio The Second having managed to escape somehow, thanks to the magic of BZ-Nui's Personal Messaging System, The Bawsz was still evilly pleased with himself. His minions had luckily managed to arrest the so-called 'Zesk Servant,' and 'Bread Bananastaircasemask' had somehow teleported away. He ignored this. Randomness seemed to flood recent events, almost as if they were all trapped inside one of those so-called randomness-filled "comedies" that were so popular on BZ-Nui. Maybe even one of Lewa0111's...No. He was just being paranoid. Lewa0111 was banned, after all.

 

He strode evilly through the basement of the Forum Tower, through the topic marked "Official Interrogation of Prisoners Topic." Two of his henchmen (one of whom, coincidentally, happened to be Henchman #5 from a few chapters go) accompanied him, standing aside as he entered the cell in which the so-called 'Zesk Servant' was being held. Passing through the cell membrane, he pushed aside a mitochondrion and found a seat on the nucleus. "So, Zesk Servant," The Bawsz said in a sterotypically evil villain voice, "if that is even your true name, I am going to ask you three questions. You will answer them. Is that clear?"

 

"Yes, sir," the prisoner replied.

 

"Do you understand that any attempts to escape or harm me will be met with fierce retribution from the Random Henchmen outside?"

 

"Yes, sir."

 

"And so that means that I will have your full cooperation?"

 

"Yes, sir."

 

"Very well," said The Bawsz, pleased. "First question: why did you come to our Forum Tower and try to gain entrance?" Strangely, the prisoner remained quiet. "You were cooperative a minute ago; ANSWER ME!"

 

"You told me to answer three questions. I answered them."

 

"WHAT!?!?!?!?!?" demanded The Bawsz. "I only asked you one, and you wouldn't even answer that one!" Pohatu appeared. "And you're not helping!" Pohatu was angrily shoved back into his time-comedy warp vortex.

 

The prisoner shrugged. "Actually, that was question number four. In order, the questions you asked me were: 1) 'Is that clear?' 2) 'Do I understand that any attempts to escape or harm you will be met with fierce retribution from the Random Henchmen outside?' 3) 'And so that means that you will have my full cooperation?' and 4) 'Why did I come to your Forum Tower and try to gain entrance?' So you see, I don't have to answer that last one."

 

The Bawsz was about to protest when he realized that 'Zesk Servant' was right. "Curse you, exact words!" he shouted in frustration. "Fine. I'll be back tomorrow." And with that, he and his two henchmen left.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Meanwhile, Lewa0111 had returned to Google-Nui after his...interesting meeting with Gabriella in the dreaded dimension of Real Life. He had decided that, while he was stuck outside of BZ-Nui, he might as well do what he could to look up more information on the Ferrets in Beige. Approaching the Search Bar, he approached the Search Bar.

 

"Redundancy is redundant!" screamed Vorox Master from his cell in the FiB Forum Tower, somehow managing to be heard all the way on Google-Nui. This reminded Lewa0111 that his friend and ally was still held captive, a fact that had conveniently been forgotten for the last several chapters. He didn't know what had happened to him, but he figured that he couldn't have been hurt if he was still able to shout his usual running joke at the presence of redundancy. As for -Blackout-, Lewa0111 had no idea what had happened to him. He immediately tried to contact Gabriella to ask for her help, but then remembered that his Personal Messenger, along with everything else, was no longer available to him as a Banned Member. It didn't matter. There were, after all, other ways...

 

"Google Search: Ferrets in Beige"

 

"Google Search: Ferrets in Beige Location"

 

"Google Search: Ferrets in Beige Security"

 

"Google Search: Freewebs-Nui Security"

 

"Google Search: Mysterious Cloaked Guy Halloween Costumes"

 

"Google Search: Infiltrating Evil Bases for Dummies"

 

Having gone through several fruitless searches, Lewa0111 had finally found a connection (and several bunches of bananas) in the final two searches. Both the costumes and the book he was after could, apparently, be found in the same place, somewhere he had never hoped to have to visit: the Expansive Baffling Auctioning Yodel, also known by its abbreviation: EBAY.

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Hello?" asked Lewa0111 tentatively, docking his boat at the Welcome Area. Almost immediately, a large, red-yellow-green-blue Greeter was in his face, talking in extremely fast, incomprehensible gibberish. "Slow down, slow down! I don't understand a word you're saying!"

 

The Greeter slowed its speech. "Hello, and welcome to EBAY! You don't have to worry about a thing, if you don't understand it that's okay, just accept and be on your way!"

 

"Did you rhyme that on purpose?" asked Lewa0111 with a :huh:.

 

"Perhaps I did, or perhaps not. Just come on in and find a slot!"

 

"I'll take that as a 'yes.' Just tell me how I can buy the book 'Infiltrating Evil Bases for Dummies' and a Mysterious Cloaked Guy Halloween costume so I can be on my way."

 

"Don't be hasty, silly pup. First you must sign yourself up!"

 

" :glare: " Lewa0111 emoticonned. All of the rhyming was beginning to get on his nerves. "Just tell me what I have to do!"

 

"One step at a time, my friend of lime. Have you yet been to PayPal-Nui?"

 

"Umm, no," said Lewa0111. "And that last thing didn't rhyme! Gotcha!"

 

"I hadn't finished yet...uh, 'shooie.'"

 

"That's not even a word!"

 

Ignoring this, the Greeter continued, "If Paypal-Nui you haven't seen, then EBAY can't accept your green!" The Greeter then shoved Lewa0111 back into the hyperlink boat, which immediately began to sail directly to Paypal-Nui. While in the boat, Lewa0111 noticed that something was in his hand: the Greeter had given him a piece of paper with the instructions on how to successfully sign up for EBAY. After signing up at PayPal-Nui, which itself required a whole host of other steps, he would then need to visit Google-Nui, the Island of E-Mail, the Account Control Tower, and five additional islands before returning to EBAY. And that was just step 1.He sighed. This...would take a while.

 

Next: Back to the RW!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Sep 14 2014 - 03:36 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#21 Offline Elrond of Rivendell

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Posted Dec 05 2011 - 06:28 PM

What is this now!?!? The wizard of Oz??? Just kiddding! This is great!!-The Bane!!! :pahrak:
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Gentlemen, it's time to spread the word. And the word is: Panic

 

life is not a question of how long we live, but what we do with the life we have



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#22 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted Dec 09 2011 - 06:15 AM

Oh, I remember this part! Yeah, I got the chapters jumbled up, didn't I -_-I always did hated these long sign up sequences, especially if I needed to go to the website fast. Nothing good is gonna account from this, am I right?
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It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#23 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Dec 15 2011 - 10:14 PM

Wow, time sure flies, doesn't it? We're finally at the last reposted chapter of The BZ-Nui Hack Wars. The next chapter will be a brand-new written chapter by me, and this story will finally continue! As before, please resend Guest Star forms if you were in the original comedy, since I don't have access to your PMs in the new system. Also, I've talked with Gabriella (who is finally back on BZP regularly again) and she has agreed to resume co-writing, so look for her posts as well as my own.

 

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 10: To the Adminmobile!

 

“Alaki! Alaki!” exclaimed ShadowBionics, running toward his fellow Randomness Warrior. Alaki had been in New Member Q&A, keeping tabs on the number of topics created about the recent Ferrets in Beige attacks and the banning of several members in addition to Lewa0111. “I was just speaking to -Blackout-, and he told me that Zeskii is still trapped in the Ferrets in Beige’s Forum Tower. If they interrogate him, they might figure out what we’re trying to do.”

 

“What?” said Alaki, turning the attention away from two Noobs who were busily getting themselves banned for leet usage. “Who’s Zeskii?”

 

“He used to be called Zesk Master. He’s the guy who hung out in the News during the first couple of chapters saying ‘redundancy is redundant.’ Remember him?”

 

“Wait, wait, wait, whoa, whoa, wait, whoa! You mean one of those running-joke-spouting characters is important to the plot!?!?!?!?” said Alaki with an :OMG:. Pohatu popped up, but before he could say his usual line, ShadowBionics sat down on top of the time-comedy warp vortex, accidentally closing it.

 

ShadowBionics nodded. “I know, right? Anyway, I think we should let Gabriella know about this. We can’t have him being interrogated by the Ferrets in Beige.”

 

:huh: ” emoticonned Alaki. “But how could he know anything about the Randomness Warriors if we only just formed two chapters ago? I’m pretty sure he would have already been imprisoned by that time.”

 

“Maybe he doesn’t know about the Randomness Warriors, but he knows that -Blackout- was snooping around their Forum Tower, along with Lewa0111, who’s supposed to be banned. They used fake names, but if Zeskii reveals who they really are, they’ll trace him back to the Randomness Warriors, and from there derive our goal from Lewa0111’s involvement.”

 

“Good point. Do you know where Gabriella is now?”

 

“No, but I have a hunch that she won’t be too hard to find….”

 

 

* * *

 

 

In COT, ShadowBionics and Alaki found Gabriella in the very first place they looked: the “Official HSM 9,321 Topic.” The fact that this number was identical to the number of floors in the Nuva Inn was, naturally, a complete coincidence. To their surprise, Mesonak and Takuma were already there. “Oh, hi there,” said Alaki. “I had no idea you all liked HSM this much. Except you, of course, Gabriella,” Alaki added with a :P.

 

“You wouldn’t believe this, but before today, I was the only member in this topic, could you imagine?” said Gabriella. “I know, ridiculous. Anyway, I took advantage of that to use this topic as a secret meeting place and headquarters for our group. I also changed the topic title from ‘9,322’ to ‘9,321,’ so that it could fit Lewa0111’s favorite number.”

 

“So the number wasn’t just a coincidence,” observed ShadowBionics. “ :o The narrator lied to us!”

 

“What narrator?”

 

“Never mind. I don’t know what would happen if I break the fourth wall in a comedy that is itself a breakage of the fourth wall.”

 

“Something tells me it would be similar to dividing by zero,” muttered Mesonak. “Anyway, Takuma and I have been at Lewa0111’s profile, trying to figure out what’s been happening with the bans and letting people know that he was framed.”

 

“And…?” offered Alaki.

 

“It didn’t go well.”

 

“How so?”

 

“Well, we ended up attracting the attention of the legendary Gold 14, who promptly warned us that we would be permanently banned if we talked about banned members. Which seems kind of unfair to me. Lewa0111’s banning was a mistake, and how are we supposed to convince anyone that he’s innocent if we can’t even talk about him?” He shrugged. “BZ-Nui’s administration is starting to make less sense than the randomest of comedies.”

 

Takuma :huh: ed. “‘Randomest?’” he asked. “Is that even a word?”

 

“It is now,” Mesonak retorted. “Anyway, I’m not sure what our next move should be. We can’t risk contacting Lewa0111 via Real Life anytime soon; the Toa of Real Life was banned yesterday. The Ferrets in Beige set him up.”

 

ShadowBionics shook his head. “They’re on to us. The Ferrets in Beige, I mean. They know our goals already. We might even be too late!”

 

“Too late for what?” asked Gabriella.”

 

“The thing we were originally going to tell you about before we got distracted talking about Gold 14. Zeskii is still a prisoner in the FiB Forum Tower.”

 

“Who’s Zeskii?”

 

“Vorox Master. He changed his name recently.”

 

“That reminds me,” Mesonak added, “my name seems not crazy enough. I’m thinking about changing it.”

 

“Well, let me know if you do; the last thing we need are two of our members changing names on me.” Gabriella sighed. “So where is this Forum Tower, again?”

 

“I can lead you there. What did you want to do?”

 

“Rescue him, duh. We look after our own!”

 

Takuma raised a hand. “I might be mistaken, but I’m pretty sure Zeskii was already a prisoner during the formation of the Randomness Warriors. So he technically isn’t ‘our own.’ We should rescue him anyway, though…”

 

“He’s an honorary Randomness Warrior,” Gabriella decided. “Anyway, we should call together the entire Randomness Warriors group. Mesonak, would you do the honors?”

 

Mesonak, who had apparently decided to become the Personal Messenger for the group, nodded and pulled out his Personal Messenging system to write Personal Messages with his Personal Messenger. “Redundancy is redundant!” they all heard Zeskii shout, from miles of hyperlinks away in his cell in the Forum Tower. He called all of the Randomness Warriors to meet in their new headquarters and sat back and waited.

 

A vaguely indeterminate amount of time later, the rest of the Randomness Warriors, including Neelh, -Blackout-, Gerlicky, ibrow, Vakama Montana, Jovan2, and Valkor. “Hey! SENTENCE FRAGMENT!” shouted Nuju angrily, before the combined might of the Randomness Warriors pushed him back out of the comedy with a shout of “Nerd!”

 

“So, does this mean we actually have a plan?” asked iborw. “Hey, my name is spelled wrong!”

 

“Can I join the Randomness Waridkors tew?” asked the Rahkshi of Letter Control.”

 

“NO!” Gabriella insisted, pushing him out of the topic. She turned to look at the rest of the Randomness Warriors. “Right, plans. Anyway, I’ve just learned from ShadowBionics, who just learned from -Blackout-, that the member Zeskii, formerly known as Vorox Master, was captured by the Ferrets in Beige after infiltrating their Forum Tower along with -Blackout- and Lewa0111, and is still being held prisoner there, facing possible interrogation; they might be able to figure out our goals and objectives from him, although they may have already done so, since our main line of communication with Lewa0111, the Toa of Real Life, was framed and subsequently banned by the Ferrets in Beige.”

 

Gerlicky just stared. “That has got to be the longest, yet still grammatically correct, sentence I have ever seen in my life.”

 

“So, which of you would like to volunteer to go to the FiB Forum Tower and rescue Zeskii?” asked Gabriella, ignoring this comment. Surprisingly enough, 17 members of the Randomness Warriors volunteered, despite the fact that there were only 12 members to begin with. “Well, we can’t all go,” she said with a sigh. “We also need volunteers to get in touch with Gold 14 and work to get him to reverse Lewa0111’s un-banning.” Again, the entire membership of the Randomness Warriors volunteered. “And we need volunteers to search the forums for an alternate method of contacting Lewa0111 with the Toa of Real Life banned.” All of the Randomness Warriors once again volunteered. “Look, I appreciate your enthusiasm, but unless you can all pull a TNI Gali and split into multiple people, we can’t all do everything. We need groups of people.”

 

“I should go to rescue Zeskii,” pointed out -Blackout-. “I’ve been there before and would make a good guide.”

 

“Finally, we are starting to get some actual coherence,” Gabriella commented. “Great. Anyone else?”

 

“I’ll go with him,” ShadowBionics stated.

 

“I’ll volunteer to get in touch with Lewa0111,” Vakama Montana offered. Valkor and Neelh both agreed to join as well. “I’d be happy to take that mission.”

 

ibrow shrugged. “I guess I’ll go with the group to rescue Zeskii.”

 

“I should probably speak with Gold 14. Gabriella, Mesonak, I think you should go, too. Between the three of us, we know BZP well enough and have enough of a reputation in Comedies and elsewhere to pull some weight,” Gerlicky suggested.

 

Gabriella agreed. “Seems reasonable enough. Takuma, want to come with us too?” Takuma Nuva nodded his assent.

 

“I’ll go rescue Zeskii too,” offered Alaki.

 

“That leaves me for the communication mission,” Jovan2 observed. “About time we accomplished something!”

 

Gabriella looked around at the assembled teams. “Great job, everyone! Now, the other two groups can take Hyperlink Boats from the Home Page. -Blackout- knows where to find the FiB Forum Tower. Vakama Montana, you and your group are on your own, unfortunately, but you’ll do fine. We should all meet up tomorrow evening at 7:00 BZ-Nui time, back here. Is that clear?”

 

“Hey, that rhymes!” pointed out Vakama Montana. “Have you been an EBAY Greeter recently?”

 

“Stop referencing events we shouldn’t know about yet!” she protested. “Anyway, let’s just go!”

 

They did so.

 

Next: The Randomness Warriors’ missions!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Sep 14 2014 - 03:42 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#24 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted Dec 16 2011 - 08:45 AM

Whoo! The final chapter! This is it, the moment we've all been waiting for! The moment... for new chapters! Oh yeah, what do you want to be included in that GS form?
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It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#25 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Dec 20 2011 - 04:49 PM

@Festus: Right, GS form. The original topic never really had one, and I'm not going to have a formal form either. Just give me your BZP member name, and any specific information you want me to know about your character self. Nothing too specific is needed but you're welcome to add details if you want!

 

And now, presenting, the continuation! Finally!

 

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 11: Name Changes and Other Randomness

 

Shortly after the Randomness Warriors' meeting, the three teams left CoT to go their separate ways. -Blackout-, ShadowBionics, ibrow, and Alaki boarded a Hyperlink Boat to head for the FiB Forum Tower, while the other two teams remained on the island. “So, how do we get to the Forum Tower?” asked ibrow.

 

-Blackout- shrugged. “Easy,” he answered. He leaned over the boat’s terminal and typed in FERRETS IN BEIGE FORUM TOWER. Immediately, the boat sped off in the designated direction. “See? No problem!”

 

“Umm, then why did we even need you to lead us there in the first place if that’s all we had to do?” asked ShadowBionics.

 

“BECAUSE I SAID SO K THANKS BYE!” shouted –Blackout- randomly.

 

With a :blink:, the other members on the boat just watched as the boat continued across the water. In no time at all, the ominous shape of the ominously ominous Forum Tower loomed ominously over the ominous horizon. A shout of “Redundancy is redundant!” coming from a location somewhere inside the tower gave them no doubt that this was where Zeskii was being held.

 

“Quiet, Zeskii!” came another shout from the same location shortly thereafter.

 

The boat pulled to a stop on the beach and the four BZ-Nui members emerged. Immediately, two more Mysterious Cloaked Guys appeared in front of them. “State your business,” said one, in a perfect impression of Metus from The Legend Reborn. “Are any of you by chance named Icky-Icky Lavalampman Handlebar Mustachio The Second or Bread Bananastaircasemask?”

 

“No,” –Blackout- lied.

 

“Okay, good. You’re free to go.” The two Mysterious Cloaked Guys pogoed away somewhere on randomly appeared pogo sticks.

 

:???: ” emoticonned Alaki. “Who’s ‘Bread Bananastaircasemask’ and ‘Icky-Icky whatever that weird thing was?’”

 

“Lewa0111 and myself,” explained –Blackout-. “Don’t ask.”

 

:blink: ” the other three members emoticonned.

 

“Whatever, it’s a long story. ShadowBionics, any chance you could figure out where the prison area is located?”

 

“Sure,” said ShadowBionics. Then, to no one in particular, he stated rather loudly, “I am randomly acting randomly random!”

 

“Redundancy is redundant!” came the expected shout from somewhere in the Forum Tower, followed by another, “Quiet, Zeskii!” This was now followed by another shout: "I changed my name, it's Festus now!"

 

“Okay, I’ve got it,” ShadowBionics said. “Zeskii--err, Festus--is right over there. All we have to do now is sneak in. Any chance we could just make more fake member accounts like you guys did back in Chapter 5?”

 

“Stop breaking the fourth wall, and no,” answered the leader of the team. “They’ll obviously be expecting that after the first time. I have a better idea, though…anybody good at being Spider-Man?”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

Meanwhile, Vakama Montana’s group were scouring BZ-Nui for clues to help them locate a way to get in touch with Lewa0111. Their first stop had, naturally, taken them to Lewa0111’s Member Profile, with the ominous pink “Banned Members” logo taking up much of the area’s space. Neelh walked over to the different links for parts of Lewa0111’s profile and was jumping up and down on them excitedly. “This is fun!” she exclaimed, switching the profile from Posts to Topics to Comments to User Info and back again with each jump.

 

“Stop that! You’re making us nauseous,” Vakama Montana said as the whirl of information behind him got faster and faster.

 

“Sorry,” said Neelh sheepishly. “ :baaa: ” she emoticonned, stopping and growing wool randomly.

 

“That was weird,” observed Jovan2.

 

“That has got to be the understatement of the millennium…”

 

“A-HEM!” shouted Vakama Montana. “Can we please get back on topic? Neelh, as long as you’re over there, do you mind switching back to User Info so we can see if he left any clues behind? E-mail addresses or anything?”

 

“Sure,” Neelh said. Unfortunately, she somehow managed to trip over the hyperlink, scattering information everywhere. Several random words bonked Jovan2 in the head. “Whoops, sorry…”

 

“It’s okay, looks like there wasn’t anything useful there anyway; his website address just pointed back here,” Valkor observed. “Vakama, what do we do now?”

 

“We use the mask powers the Great Spirit gave us!” quoted a randomly appearing Whenua before Vakama Montana whacked him upside the head and sent him back through the time-comedy warp vortex.

 

Vakama Montana strode over to the profile, which, thanks to Neelh’s tripping, had ended up on the Profile Comments page. “Huh,” he mused, as he glanced over the comments. “I had forgotten that Lewa0111 was in college; the same as Gabriella, in fact. And everyone knows that everyone in college has to have some kind of social networking profile. We may not know his real name, but he knows his own screenname, and sooner or later someone has to notice a post about Lewa0111. This place is pointless, let’s go somewhere else! Let’s go…to #####!”

 

“#####?” inquired Jovan2. “How do you even pronounce that?”

 

“The same way you pronounce emoticons, probably…” muttered Neelh.

 

“That’s weird. Let me try saying that again. Let’s go to #####!” The other Randomness Warriors laughed. “Hey, what gives?”

 

“Word filters,” Valkor observed. “We aren’t allowed to talk about most other social networking or video sites here.”

 

“Oh, good point. Well, what about fake stand-ins for real sites?”

 

Valkor shrugged. “I don’t see why not. It’s worth a try, anyway.”

 

“All right then. Let’s go…to ‘Facetwitspaceupontumbtube!’”

 

“That’s even less pronounceable than #####,” Neelh observed.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Toa Gabriella, Mesonak, Takuma Nuva, and Gerlicky zoomed through a link chute on BZ-Nui, headed straight for the profile of the legendary Administrator, Gold 14. Strangely, the chute was even more crowded than usual, owing to the recent influx of Noobs and Newbies bombarding the moderators with questions. The recent attacks by the Ferrets in Beige had, in addition, driven even more members to ask questions, ignoring the Q&amp;A Forum for some random reason. Due to the overcrowding, the four members of the Randomness Warriors found themselves bumped, jostled, and just generally bruised up after they finally emerged from the chute to land in an undignified heap on the floor of the profile.

 

“Well, this is awkward,” stated Mesonak, who had landed in a position perfectly balancing on his head. “If I move, I’ll fall…”

 

The others pulled themselves to their feet. “Here, I’ll help,” Gabriella offered, bodily lifting Mesonak and flipping him into the air. This time, he landed on his feet. “There you go!”

 

“When did you get so strong?”

 

Ignoring this, Gabriella looked around the profile. The entire area was crowded with a mob of pushing, shoving, and cramming members, all shouting random questions aloud, such as “ARE YOU REALLY A GOLD NUMBER 14?” and “WHY DID YOU MINUS PROTO FROM ME” and “R U HAPRPY TOFU IN DISGUISE???”

 

Gold 14 himself was standing at the head of the profile, safe behind 14 walls of protosteel with a small communications link between his location and the outside of the walls. Since he could only answer questions one at a time, a rather large line had formed leading from the communications link all the way to the entrance to the chute, where Gabriella and the others were located. Unfortunately, the line was moving so slowly that it would most likely take several decades for Gabriella and co.’s answers to be questioned…er, I mean, questions to be answered. Stupid Rahkshi of Letter Control.

 

“Great. Now what do we do?” inquired Takuma, looking around the profile with dismay. “There are newbies and noobs everywhere!”

 

“Easy,” said Mesonak. “This is an emergency, right? And we’re relatively well-known members, right? So just do this!” He cleared his throat and started singing the RickRoll extremely loudly. Immediately, everyone covered their ears and started screaming at the torturous music, quickly clearing out of the profile. When everyone had left, he stopped singing.“You could have just let me do that,” Gabriella pointed out. “I’m a Toa of Music, after all.”

 

“But where’s the fun in that?” said Mesonak with a :D.

 

With the profile cleared, they walked up to the front of the profile, standing right next to the communications link. Gabriella was the one to speak. “Excuse me, oh great Gold 14,” she began, “but we are upstanding members of the BZ-Nui community wishing to alert you to a grievous injustice performed upon our fair island.”

 

“Stop using those fancy medieval words, I don’t understand them! Speak English, please!”

 

“Oh, sorry.” Gabriella stopped and started again, this time speaking normally. “Gold 14, we wanted to let you know that there was a mistake. Somebody banned Lewa0111, and he didn’t do anything wrong, he was hacked. He should be allowed to come back to the island, and—”

 

“WE DON’T TALK ABOUT BANNED MEMBERS!!” screamed Gold 14 rather abruptly. “ :alert: ” he emoticonned. “All moderators, attack!”

 

A large number of Moderators began pouring in from the chutes, drawn to the area by the alarm ready to arrest the heroes. How an alarm could arrest anyone, Gabriella wasn’t sure, but she didn’t have time to react. “Come on! Let’s go!” she exclaimed, grabbing Mesonak and Takuma by the hands, with Gerlicky trailing behind, and leading them all down a conveniently placed ventilation shaft that easily allowed them to make their escape. Behind them, the Moderators could be heard combing the area, but thankfully, no one noticed the blatantly obvious vent.

 

After moving through the twisting, winding corridors for several moments, the four of them emerged somewhere in the long-disused BionicleSector01 forum. Cobwebs grew on the few topics in the area, and not a member was in sight. “We made it,” gasped Takuma. “That was close.”

 

“Who would have thought they’d get so upset about our protesting a banning?” asked Mesonak. “How are we supposed to help if they won’t even let us talk about him?”

 

Gerlicky shrugged. “I don’t know. What’s more important, though, is how come you two got to hold Gabriella’s hands back there, and not me?”

 

Gabriella rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. I don’t have three hands, obviously, and you just happened to be standing farther away from me. Does grabbing someone’s hand to pull them in a certain direction automatically signify romance or something?”

 

“Yes,” agreed the entire BZPower shipping fanbase.

 

She sighed. “You people are ridiculous. Especially since, this being a comedy about actual BZP members, showing relationships between the characters isn’t allowed in this comedy.”

 

“Good point,” agreed Gerlicky, Takuma, and Mesonak.

 

“Let’s just go. I have another idea as to how to protest Lewa0111’s banning…”

 

As they walked off toward the exit to the abandoned forum, a mysterious figure watched them from above…a member of the Ferrets in Beige.

 

Next: Lewa0111’s plan!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Sep 14 2014 - 03:51 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#26 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted Dec 22 2011 - 08:23 PM

Ooh, three team split ups! I have this strange feeling... the feeling that everything is going to go very, VERY wrong. Let's just hope no one does anything that culd cause the destruction of the entire group... knowing this as your comedy, everything WILL get screwed up.
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It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#27 Offline V.M.Torious 4.0

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Posted Dec 31 2011 - 08:34 AM

So here are my two cents about this comedy: it totally rocks! Why? Well, I was laughing out loud on the references to the old BZP forums (from 2009), as well as the jokes about the internet, as well as the BZP and Lego forums too! This comedy really brought back some memories of 2009, but here's one thing: I've changed my username from Vakama Montana to V.M.Torious 4.0, so you guys might want to add the name change starting with the next chapter, but please drop the "4.0" from "V.M.Torious 4.0" so it looks like "V.M. Torious". And regarding your chapters, Toa Gabriella, I really enjoyed it! You're great at writing script-style comedies, too! Happy New Year and keep up the good work! ~ :haunu: VM4.0 :haunu:
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Vakama Montana's Chronicles: The Official Blog of V.M.Torious 4.0!
BZP Member V.M.Torious 4.0 (formerly Vakama Montana0111), a.k.a. Lego Club/MLN Member Vakama4688.
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#28 Offline CrasherDasher

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Posted Jan 03 2012 - 12:48 PM

Was it ever figured out why someone was getting people banned? :huh: Great job on the comedy! :lol:
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#29 Offline Jovan2

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Posted Jan 07 2012 - 09:48 AM

Was it ever figured out why someone was getting people banned? :huh: Great job on the comedy! :lol:

Well, the comedy itself is based on the Maori Controversy, where an actual hacker was wreaking havoc with our forums. But in this comedy, it is all part of the evil plot of the Bawsz, who wants to get revenge on Bzpower for banning him years ago.

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#30 Offline CrasherDasher

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Posted Jan 07 2012 - 10:16 AM

Was it ever figured out why someone was getting people banned? :huh: Great job on the comedy! :lol:

Well, the comedy itself is based on the Maori Controversy, where an actual hacker was wreaking havoc with our forums. But in this comedy, it is all part of the evil plot of the Bawsz, who wants to get revenge on Bzpower for banning him years ago.

Thanks.

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#31 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Feb 10 2012 - 05:04 PM

@Crasher92: Actually, you're half right. The comedy is actually based on the MiB Hackings, which occurred in Spring 2009, much later than the Maori one, which happened before I joined. During the MiB hackings, I myself fell victim to it and was (temporarily) banned. However, the part about The Bawsz was correct. XD.

 

And now, after a long hiatus due to a variety of obnoxious things conspiring to keep me off of BZPower, it's finally time for a new chapter!

 

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 12: Metal Gear Solid, Lewa0111 Edition

 

"Finally!" gasped Lewa0111, after returning to EBAY-Nui for the 9827634962985th time. He had spent the last several days traveling back and forth between different locations, filling out countless forms, and paying way too many widgets in cover charges, all while fighting off Scams, Advertisements, and other monsters of the Internet, but at last he had completed all of the steps necessary to go onto EBAY-Nui. "Okay," he said, sighing and gazing at the search bar, "I need a Mysterious Cloaked Guy Halloween Costume and the book Infiltrating Evil Bases for Dummies."

 

Instantly, several options for each item appeared around him, with their prices listed below. Lewa0111 looked around at the various options for the Halloween costume, ranging from mint condition (literally, the costumes were made out of mint leaves) to really-great condition, to sorta-okay condition, to barely-recognizable-as-a-costume condition. He spotted a really-great condition costume at the front of the options, priced at only W0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000001! "Wow, this is crazy! Best deal ever!" he exclaimed as he selected it. "Wait...there's gotta be a catch."

 

Lewa0111's suspicions were confirmed when the Shipping and Handling box appeared: W9123876489025923987648279867801680347987628962340856. "What? How--This is Cyber Magna! Everything just gets instantly teleported to you! Why would I need to pay that much for shipping and--oh, forget it." He backed out of the option room and looked around for a more reasonably priced costume.

 

After several hours of fruitless searching, he had finally found a costume in All-Right-I-Guess condition for a decent price, and the costume even came with a free apple. "Well, that took long enough," he muttered. Then he paused. "Why am I talking to myself all of a sudden? Guess this is what happens when you only have one character in a scene." With a :ziplip:, Lewa0111 stopped talking to himself and just proceeded to search for the second item on his list without any more talking to himself. After searching through many absurdly priced and horribly beat-up conditions of the book he was looking for, he found that one as well.

 

At long last, now armed with all of the necessary equipment, Lewa0111 was able to leave EBAY-Nui for the final time. He stepped onto the Hyperlink Boat with his new costume and book, put on the costume and adjusted it tightly, and input the phrase "FERRETS IN BEIGE FORUM TOWER" into the boat's terminal, speeding off for the forum tower.

 

 

* * *

 

 

"State your business," said the familiar Metus-impersonating guards at the base of the Forum Tower. Lewa0111, safe in his Halloween costume, was indistinguishable from a member of the Ferrets in Beige. Upon further inspection, the guards noticed this. "Oh. You're a Mysterious Cloaked Guy. Never mind, you're free to go!"

 

"And if you hear anything about somebody named Bread Bananastaircasemask or Icky-Icky Lavalampman...et cetera, let us know!" the second guard called after him as Lewa0111 walked onward into the tower. Inside, the building was filled with a confounding maze of cavernous hallways. Luckily for him, Lewa0111 still remembered the basic layout from the previous time he had been there, and so he was able to avoid getting lost. Stealthily, quietly, he crept through the hallways, trying his best to avoid making obnoxiously loud echoing steps. Several times, he passed calmly by other Mysterious Cloaked Guys, Random Henchmen, and other members of the Ferrets in Beige without any undue confrontations.

 

Unfortunately, when he arrived at the entrance to the prison subforum and was about to congratulate himself on a job well done, Lewa0111 was confronted by a Random Henchman. "What are you doing here, Mysterious Cloaked Guy? Get back to your post!"

 

Lewa0111 was taken aback to be confronted on this side of the top of the base. "Umm...right," he stammered. "I just left my post for a moment because...umm..."

 

"Stop making direction puns already! Just explain what you're doing in the prison subforum! Can't you read?"

 

The guard pointed to the top of the area, where a sign read, "PRISON SUBFORUM. PERMISSION RESTRICTED TO ALL NON-HENCHMEN OR THE BAWSZ."

 

"Oh," said Lewa0111. "Well...umm...I just had to...go to...the shoe store and...iron...a duck, bye!" he exclaimed, and quickly ran off.

 

After the Random Henchman had finished puzzling over this completely bizarre excuse, he shouted, "Hey, who are you? Get back here!" and started chasing after him.

 

Lewa0111 rounded a corner and changed out of the encumbering costume, now that he had been discovered. Then, he quickly re-squared the corner to cover all traces that he had rounded it. He sprinted off and hid behind a conveniently placed muffin just in time before the Henchman arrived. He stooped down and picked up the limp, discarded costume. "What's this?" he asked. "I'd better report to The Bawsz immediately." With that, the Henchman continued onward, all thoughts of the intruder forgotten.

 

With a sigh, Lewa0111 emerged from behind the muffin. "That was close! I wonder who this 'The Bawsz' he spoke of is?" Mentally filing that information away for later, he walked back toward the Prison Subforum, which was now unguarded. Carefully, he crept inside, noticing a large number of prison cells lining the walls. "Hello? Anyone?" he called out, glancing warily around for more guards as he kept his katanas held at the ready. "Zeskii?"

 

"Lewa0111? Is that you?" asked Zeskii from inside one of the cells. "The name's Festus now, but anyway...what are you doing here?"

 

"Rescuing you, of course!" he said to Zesk--err, Festus. "Stand back!" Lewa0111 charged at the cell door and swung both his weapons with all of his might. Surprisingly, they were not strong enough to break the bars, and Lewa0111 went flying backward to land with a crash against the far wall. "Ouch. Stupid bars!"

 

"Look out!" Festus cried out, just in time for Lewa0111 to turn and block an attack from a large number of Ferrets in Beige members, drawn to the subforum by the sound of the crash.

 

Lewa0111 just shook his head. "Oh, come on," he groaned. "How in Hapori Tohu's name am I supposed to fight off this many Random Henchmen and Mysterious Cloaked Guys alone? Worst odds ever."

 

"Because he's NOT alone!" shouted Alaki from outside. Just then, -Blackout- and company from the previous chapter swung in on randomly appeared Spider-Man webs through the window and landed next to Lewa0111. "Luckily for you, we got here just in time. Looks like you could use a little help!"

 

"But what are you all doing here?" Lewa0111 asked. "Why?"

 

"Looking for you. And it looks like we succeeded."

 

"Well, actually, we were rescuing Festus, Neelh's group are looking for you--ouch!" said ibrow, before ShadowBionics bopped him upside the head.

 

"Technicality," muttered ShadowBionics. "Now, who's ready to fight some Ferrets?"

 

Next: An Awesomely Awesome Fight Scene, and other stuff!

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Sep 19 2014 - 02:51 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#32 Offline Elrond of Rivendell

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Posted Feb 13 2012 - 11:57 AM

Fight Scene!!! Get ready for randomly flying rubber chickens :sigh: Anyway, loved this chapter for what it was leading up to, otherwise, it's bland in comparison to your other funny randomness.Not trying to be critical, I thought the E-*message blocked due to using the name of well known auction website* scene was funny.-Bane :pakari:
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Gentlemen, it's time to spread the word. And the word is: Panic

 

life is not a question of how long we live, but what we do with the life we have



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#33 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Feb 15 2012 - 11:23 PM

...What? Somehow almost the entire chapter didn't post. I had the whole thing written out, but all I got was the first few lines. Especially frustrating since I didn't have the chapter saved anywhere else. *sigh*

 

@Rocka: I realize that this type of "plot-based" comedy isn't as purely funny as the more random comedies like TNI. It's one of the problems with having a plot and especially the prose style: a lot of space has to be devoted to setting up future scenes, so as a result it's a bit more serious than otherwise, which is one of the reasons I called this an "epic comedy." Though I'm glad you liked the EBVAY minus V scene.

 

And, today is Wednesday, so that means it's time for a new chapter! Hopefully I will remain on a regular schedule again...

 

The BZ-Nui Hack Wars

A BIONICLE comedy by Me!

Chapter 13: The Most Epically Hilarious Fight of the Century Begins

 

"Hey, cool! That's the subtitle of the original topic!" Festus exclaimed upon seeing the chapter title.

 

" :glare: " emoticonned Lewa0111, as he dodged a flying clump of spam from one of the FiB's weapons. The spam slammed into the wall, writing "lolz hi kutgw 10/10" on the wall. "Is this really the time?"

 

"Yes!" exclaimed Festus with a :D.

 

"Eat pies, BZP members!" growled a Mysterious Cloaked Guy. Thinking quickly, Lewa0111 pulled out a computer keyboard and typed into it. A split second later, Tava appeared and ate the rapid-fire barrage of pies fired from the MCG's pie launcher.

 

ibrow dodged another pie and whipped out a hyperlink to BZPower's Rules and Regulations, shoving a Random Henchman into it. "Nice Tavashield!"

 

"Thanks!"

 

"Look out, both of you!" Alaki called out, pointing to behind the swarm of MCG's and Random Henchmen. Lewa0111 glanced over to see a Slightly Less Mysterious Cloaked Guy (incidentally, the same one who had been interrogated by Gabriella and Mesonak several chapters ago) typing into a computer terminal. "It looks like he's trying to hack--"

 

Just then, the SLMCG pressed one last button, and a glowing light surrounded him, pulling him into the computer. At the same moment, Alaki froze. Alaki's eyes then turned an evil shade of red (Evil Red! Available now in specially marked boxes of Limited Edition Crayola crayons, buy yours today!) and the voice was augmented with one of those extra-voices-demon-reverb-audio effects. "Muahahaha!" laughed Hacked Alaki. "I have hacked this pathetic BZPower member and gained access to all of this form's powers! Now, with these powers, I shall bring all of you pathetic BZP members to meet your ultimate doom and destruction, and cause you to enter a world of pain and suffering..."

 

ShadowBionics leaned over to Lewa0111. "You know what?" he whispered to him. "I wish I had a video recorder right now. 'Alaki In G Major' would get so many views on that unmentionable video website!"

 

"You're right," Lewa0111 answered. "Those videos are hilarious! I love that effect!"

 

" :superfunny: " all of the non-hacked BZP members emoticonned.

 

"YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE COWERING IN FEAR!" demanded Hacked Alaki. "I'm evil! I'm elaborating on how you're all going to meet a horrific doom, and you're laughing? How dare you!?!?!?!?!?" he said with an >:( .

 

ibrow shrugged. "Oh, please. That evil red eyes of doom effect is so cliche, and the G Major audio demon voice is hilarious! Hey, can you sing us a song? Maybe the Sparta Remix?"

 

"Oh, for the love of the beige ferret itself...Mysterious Cloaked Guys! Random Henchmen! Destroy them!"

 

After this brief intermission, the battle was joined once again. A Mysterious Cloaked Guy charged toward Lewa0111, launching globs of [POTTY HUMOR REMOVED] at the former BZP member, intending to get him censored from the comedy. Lewa0111, however, just stood there calmly, remembering that he had already used the exact same joke in his comedy Pokerahi. Because of this, he was immune to its effects. The MCG just became enraged and threw a randomly appeared rubber banana at the comedy writer instead.

 

In another part of the battle, ibrow was desperately trying to force a Capitalization Staff wielded by a Random Henchman away from his face. He strained, knowing that if the staff touched his face, it would force him to capitalize his name. Luckily, ShadowBionics arrived just in time, jumping on the Random Henchman from behind and twisting him into a position so that his weapon was pointed back at its owner. ibrow finished the job, forcing the staff down into the Random Henchman's face. Upon impact, it turned the opponent into a RANDOM HENCHMAN. The RANDOM HENCHMAN quickly ran off into a deeper part of the fortress, looking for a way to uncapitalize his name. "Thanks," ibrow said.

 

"No problem!" answered ShadowBionics as he turned to engage another Random Henchman.

 

Lewa0111 shoved a Random Henchman out of his way and jammed a :mirunu: emoticon onto a MCG's head. Just then, he noticed Hacked Alaki sneaking stealthily around the battlefield, attempting to flee away from the scene. "Oh, no you don't, get back here!"

 

Hacked Alaki, seeing this, broke into a run. The owner of the run kicked Hacked Alaki back out, and he landed back in the battlefield. Quickly, Lewa0111 typed into his keyboard, materializing Grahu's Sword of Punctuation in his hand. With one swipe of the sword, he! created! a! barrier! of! exclamation! points! in! front! of! Hacked! Alaki! preventing! him! from! escaping!. "Stand and fight, you coward!"

 

"What are you going to do to me, pest?" asked Hacked Alaki. "Destroy me?"

 

"Nah. All I have to do is keep you from escaping."

 

Hacked Alaki laughed, an interestingly hilarious sound with the demonic audio effect. "What do you think that will do? Nothing you can do here will unhack your friend's profile."

 

Lewa0111 shook his head. "I don't plan to. That's his job."

 

He pointed to the computer terminal from earlier, where -Blackout-, who had been ignored in this chapter up until this sentence, was busily typing very quickly into it. " :howdy: " emoticonned -Blackout-.

 

"NO!" Hacked Alaki demanded. "Where did he come from!?"

 

"You gotta love the power of accidental comedy character ignoring!" gloated Lewa0111.

 

"STOP!" shouted Hacked Alaki, but -Blackout- was too far away to be stopped, even without the! barrier! of! exclamation! points! standing! in! the! way!. -Blackout- finished his hacking and pressed the "enter" key, and suddenly Hacked Alaki collapsed to the ground. The SLMCG materialized on the floor, unconscious.

 

Alaki groaned. "Where am I? What happened?"

 

"You were hacked and--LOOK OUT!" shouted -Blackout-. A Mysterious Cloaked Guy ran at Alaki, screaming incomprehensible gibberish and taking aim with an Internet Launcher. Alaki ducked as -Blackout- pointed at the enemy and exclaimed, "Power of Typos!" The blast of typos hit the Internet Launcher, turning it into an Internet Lawn Chair, and so Alaki was merely bonked on the head with a flying lawn chair. However, since this was a reused joke from another Lewa0111 comedy, it did no damage.

 

"You know what? Enough of this," muttered Lewa0111. Then he exclaimed in an extremely loud voice, "Finally! Here come our reinforcements!"

 

" :???: " emoticonned ibrow. "But we don't have any reinforcements..."

 

Lewa0111 grinned. "No, but they don't know that," he said. Sure enough, after this exclamation, the MCGs and Random Henchmen began retreating, leaderless and realizing that their attacks weren't having much effect. Before long, the prison area was devoid of anyone other than the BZP members.

 

Festus stood up and looked around. "They're gone," he pointed out. "Now what?"

 

"They'll probably be reporting to The Bawsz, who's apparently their leader," said Lewa0111. "Then they'll come back after realizing we don't really have any reinforcements. I say we get out of here while we still can."

 

"No problem, I work fast," said Alaki, randomly quoting Kiina. "We brought Instant Spider-Man Webbing to get in here." All of the members of -Blackout-'s team produced spray cans of Instant Spider-Man Webbing. "We can just get out the same way."

 

Soon, everyone had attached the webbing to the outer wall of the fortress and began to swing down, with Lewa0111 riding on -Blackout-'s back. "Umm, guys?" Festus called out. "Did we forget that we hadn't actually set me free yet?"

 

" :blush: " Lewa0111 emoticonned. "Whoops..."

 

 

* * *

 

 

Meanwhile, Vakama Montana had led his group of Randomness Warriors to the social networking site Facetwitspaceupontumbtube, which was totally not a mixture of several real popular websites that aren't allowed on BZP. He led the group to his own profile, titled [CENSORED], since real life names aren't allowed on BZP either. "Okay," he said once everyone had settled down (and Neelh had stopped bouncing around randomly). "I suggest we make a post asking for help unbanning Lewa0111 from non-BZPower members as well as asking for him to get in contact with us if he can. Any suggestions?"

 

"How about starting it with 'Dear Lewa0111,'" suggested Jovan2.

 

Vakama Montana shook his head. "Too cliche, for one, and also we aren't just addressing him. We want other people to read this, too."

 

"'SUPER URGENT INFORMATION READ THIS NOW K THANKS BYE!'" suggested Neelh.

 

"That seems a little...extreme. Anyone have any better ideas?" Silence. "Fine, then I guess we're going with Neelh's idea." Vakama Montana opened a new post and began it with "SUPER URGENT INFORMATION READ THIS NOW K THANKS BYE!". "Okay, what next?"

 

"We should describe what's going on, as concisely as possible," said Valkor. "Maybe mention something about the Randomness Warriors' goal, and add something like 'now recruiting?'"

 

"Good idea." Vakama Montana wrote a very long and detailed paragraph describing the situation, the FiB's attacks, and the Randomness Warriors' formation, and also describing Lewa0111 and where to look for him. "There! Finished! Now we just need a title."

 

"UNBAN LEWA) !!! JOIN THE PETITION" suggested, (who else?) Neelh.

 

Jovan2 glanced over at her. "You might want to let go of the shift key when typing the numbers in his name."

 

"Oh, whoops..."

 

Vakama Montana added the overly-hyper title. "Finally, done! Now to click save and--" He was interrupted by the clatter of letters from behind him. He looked to see that Neelh had started randomly bouncing around again, accidentally knocking over a pile of letters and scattering random letters all over the post. "NEELH!"

 

"What? ...Sorry."

 

"Here, I'll help," said Valkor. He picked up an erase tool and attempted to erase the spilled gibberish. Unfortunately, he accidentally grabbed an erase all tool instead, deleting the entire post.

 

" :facepalm: " emoticonned Vakama Montana, forgetting in his frustration that this was not a real emoticon. "We're gonna be here all day."

 

Next: Gabriella's Quest! (Hopefully written by Gabriella herself...)

 

~Lewa# Studios

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Sep 19 2014 - 03:15 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#34 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted Feb 18 2012 - 06:16 PM

Huh, no replies yet? Oh well.

 

This is just a quick update to let everyone know that there won't be a new chapter of Hack Wars today, even though it's Saturday. Gabriella's working on the next one but she's very busy, so her chapter won't be posted until Wednesday. The schedule will then continue as normal.

 

Sorry for the inconvenience! However, to make up for it, my posted chapters of The Nuva Inn and Mata Nova will both be extra-long today.

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Sep 19 2014 - 03:15 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#35 Offline Elrond of Rivendell

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Posted Feb 20 2012 - 12:48 PM

Sorry about the lack of recent replies, I haven't had much time to be on BZP. Anyhooo,

ShadowBionics leaned over to Lewa0111. "You know what?" he whispered to him. "I wish I had a video recorder right now. 'Alaki In G Major' would get so many views on that unmentionable video website!""You're right," Lewa0111 answered. "Those videos are hilarious! I love that effect!"" :superfunny: " all of the non-hacked BZP members emoticonned."YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE COWERING IN FEAR!" demanded Hacked Alaki. "I'm evil! I'm elaborating on how you're all going to meet a horrific doom, and you're laughing? How dare you!?!?!?!?!?" he said with an http://www.bzpower.c...tyle_emoticons/default/mad.gif.ibrow shrugged. "Oh, please. That evil red eyes of doom effect is so cliche, and the G Major audio demon voice is hilarious! Hey, can you sing us a song? Maybe the Sparta Remix?"

It really is soooo cliche, why not evil blue eyes, or green, brown, black.....Back on topic, I think this is one of the funniest posts of the bunch. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.-Bane

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Gentlemen, it's time to spread the word. And the word is: Panic

 

life is not a question of how long we live, but what we do with the life we have



BZRPG profiles


#36 Offline Toa Gabriella0111

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Posted May 08 2012 - 12:43 AM

Hi everyone, I'm back! Sorry for being late but it took me a while to finish this chapter, I wish I was like Lewa# and could write a chapter in a few hours but, unfortunately, I'm not. So, sorry for messing up the schedule (though Lewa, you've let the schedule slip plenty of times before too remember...) Plus, the forums suddenly going down didn't help matters either. Oh well. New chapter, finally!The BZ-Nui Hack WarsA BIONICLE comedy by Lewa0111!Gabriella Chapter 4: Escalation OR The Protest"So, remind me what we're doing here again?" asked Takuma, as Gabriella's group of Randomness Warriors walked briskly through the streets of BZ-Nui.Gabriella sighed. "Did you forget already? We're going to start an island-wide protest of the FiB and Lewa0111's banning, of course! With enough BZPower members on our side, and enough awareness of the situation, Gold 14 will have to listen to us no matter what the banned member policy says!""Well, yeah, I knew that already. Thanks.""But if you knew that already, Takuma," Mesonak asked, "then why did you ask her to remind you?""Because it's been a while since the last time the comedy focused on our group, and readers might have forgotten, so I figured it would make a nice recap."" :blink: " emoticonned Mesonak, Gabriella, and Gerlicky.Takuma just shrugged. "What? Breaking the fourth wall is fun!""But this comedy itself already breaks the fourth wall...and didn't we already have this discussion several chapters ago?"Luckily, they were interrupted from breaking the fourth wall any more times by their arrival in New Member Q&A. "Quiet," whispered Gabriella. "We're here."All around them, the forum was a flurry of activity. Newbs and noobs ran everywhere, the former asking many legitimate questions of the other helpful members and the latter just asking dumb things such as "how do u use emetionz???//" or "what is hapree tofu? is he a tofu?" A scattering of more experienced members and staff tried to answer these questions as best they could and keep order, but the forum was rapidly degenerating into something that would almost put the dreaded Lego Message Boards to shame. "What's going on here?" asked Takuma. "This is bad even by Q&A standards, and that's saying a lot."Immediately a noob came up to the Randomness Warriors. "hi yuou look exprineced so tell me wats a blog? it is like a log but wif a b??/""No," answered Takuma, "a blog is a feature for Premier Members that allows them to make blog entries about any appropriate subject, comment, share images, and other things. Anyone can comment on someone's blog, but only Premier Members can make their own.""k thanks, so wats premir mean?""You have to pay money to become a Premier Member, which gives you certain perks like blogs or rank images.""can i pay wif wigdts?""No, you need to pay with real money.""ok i don't have any monee i m a hobo on the stert bye!"The noob scampered off somewhere. "Nice job, Takuma," Mesonak said. "I don't know if I could have stayed rational having to deal with him. I probably would have just ended up chucking a Report Button at him in frustration.""If you answer their questions, they go away eventually," Takuma said. "But now what? The forum is still horribly over-infested with questions. Where are all the members who used to frequent here? They should be helping out...""Beats me."Then, a much more rational-seeming member walked up to them. "Takuma!" he called out. "I am so glad to see you! We're horribly understaffed, help us answer some of these questions! The noobs and newbs are everywhere!""Sorry, but we don't really have a lot of time," Gabriella said. "We're here to ask questions, not answer them.""But why is this place so overcrowded? Where are all the experienced members?" asked Takuma. "This place wasn't nearly as bad last time I was here..."The BZP member sighed. "Well," he explained, "surely you've heard about the hackings going on lately. Lots of members are being hacked and sent weird PM's, apparently from some organization calling themselves the Ferrets in Beige. Have you heard of them?"The four Randomness Warriors looked at each other. "Yeah, we kinda noticed...""What does that have to do with NM Q&A, though?""Well," he explained, "Gold 14 and the other Moderators tried to stop the hackings the only way they knew how: by banning everyone who's been hacked, most of whom were important, prominent members. So now there's a huge influx of newbies and too few experienced members to control them. Even worse, it doesn't seem to be helping, since about half of the new members are actually more hacked FiB members in disguise. BZ-Nui is dissolving into chaos."Mesonak shrugged. "So?""Even more chaos than usual," the member clarified." :OMG: " the Randomness Warriors emoticonned."Yep. Well, I can't stay, I need to help attempt to keep this forum orderly. Bye now!" The random BZP member left as randomly as he had come.Gabriella shrugged. "Well," she said, "now what? Things have gotten a lot worse than I thought.""It's more important than ever that we get our cause out there. The FiB must be stopped." Takuma turned and strode over to the "Create New Topic" button and activated it. Inside, he wrote:

Hi, everyone. I know I'm not exactly a "new member" but I have a question: what exactly is being done so far to stop these Ferrets in Beige hackings? Besides banning all of the innocent members who were the victims of the hacking, I mean. Thanks!

"Now what?" asked Mesonak.Takuma pointed over to the giant "refresh" button on the ground at the front of the forum. "We jump up and down on that button until we get a reply, of course!"Script-speaking Spongebob Narrator: Five hours later...Of the group of four Randomness Warriors, only the somewhat overly-hyper Gabriella was still jumping up and down. The other three were just sitting down next to it, watching wearily. "This is taking forever!" complained Gerlicky. "Why won't anyone reply?""Maybe because you three aren't trying hard enough! Come on, keep jumping!" shouted Gabriella excitedly."How in Hapori Tohu's name are you still so hyper? It's been five hours according to the Spongebob Narrator!" protested Mesonak."How are you so lazy?""Touche..."Suddenly, much to everyone's surprise, when Gabriella jumped on the button again, a reply materialized beneath them. "Wow, cool, a reply! It's about time..." muttered Takuma."Let's read it!" Together, the four Randomness Warriors walked to the low end of the topic and read the reply. It said:

Don't worry. Additional measures are being prepared to deal with the Ferrets in Beige. In the meantime, though, we will try to stop them quicker by banning even MORE members! :D--Some Random Moderator

" :mellow: " emoticonned all of the Randomness Warriors.Takuma shrugged. “Somehow, that wasn’t exactly the response I was expecting. Don’t they get it? The banning is only adding to the problem, not fixing it!”“I guess they’ve never had to deal with a large-scale attack like this before. One spammer here or there is easily dealt with, but a group that can continuously hack existing members’ accounts? BZ-Nui just doesn’t know how to handle this,” Gerlicky explained.“That reminds me of something that’s been bothering me for a while,” put in Gabriella as the four of them moved toward the exit of New Member Q&A. “Yes, we’ve had attacks on the forums before, but all of those times, it typically involved a person or a group making their own accounts and spamming or flaming using those before eventually being banned. Yet, somehow, the Ferrets in Beige are able to take over existing members. How? No one else has ever been able to do that as far as we know.”Gerlicky shrugged. “Good question, I haven’t the slightest idea. I suppose the first thing we ought to do is work on making ourselves, and the other citizens of BZ-Nui, more secure. It’s the best we can do until we figure out a way to discover how exactly they are doing this hacking.”“More secure? How?”“By changing our passwords, obviously.”“ :???: ” the others simply emoticonned.“Well, seeing as that’s how we connect to our profiles in the first place, I’d say it’s a good place to start. I mean, I know most of us don’t really think about it, having our profiles remembered permanently since it doesn’t make a lot of sense not to, but under the circumstances…” The others just stared, looking more confused than ever. Gerlicky sighed, realizing that no one else but him even knew what he was talking about. “You know what? Never mind that. Let’s just focus on our original plan instead.”“Which was…?”The entire group just stared at each other blankly, having gotten so distracted by the events in New Member Q&A and Gerlicky’s bizarre conversation about profiles and passwords that they had all completely forgotten what their original plan even was in the first place. “I don’t know,” Gabriella admitted. “I forgot. Maybe we should PM the leaders of the Randomness Warriors and ask them to remind us.”“ http://www.bzpower.c...tyle_emoticons/default/annoyed2.gif ” emoticonned Mesonak, Takuma, and Gerlicky.“What?”Takuma began to use the :facepalm: emoticon before remembering there was no such thing. He settled for actually facepalming instead. “You. ARE. The. Leader.”“What? Oh, right. I kept thinking it was Lewa0111.”“He’s banned! That’s the whole purpose of the organization in the first place, unbanning him! Seriously, did you get bonked on the head recently or something?”“Leave her alone,” Mesonak chimed in. “She’s just confused. My mind is still boggled by that whole dissertation Gerlicky gave about profiles. I bet hers is, too.”“Why are wind chimes randomly chinging above your head?” asked Gerlicky.Mesonak glanced up to see a group of wind chimes. “Huh. Weird. I guess that’s what happens when you ‘chime in,’” he observed.“Whatever. We still don’t know what we’re supposed to be doing, and since even Gabriella can’t remember, that doesn’t exactly help us,” observed Takuma. “However,” he added with a :sly:, “I think I may have a solution…”THE ENDToaG Productions, Inc. (In association with Lewa# Studios)~Toa Gabriella~

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My three favorite things are Bionicle, High School Musical, and Lewa0111. Guess what? They're all in one topic! Or, visit my comedy: The Story of Toa Gabriella
Hey, I'm a Toa--a Toa of Music, that is! But hang on, wasn't I a Turaga before? Something seems backwards...


Are you a fan of any or all of Lewa0111's comedies? Then please, help me with making a wiki for them! Just search "Lewa0111 Comedy Wiki" on any search engine to find it (since I can't link to sites with forums!) Thanks a ton! ^_^

#37 Offline Lewa0111 Nuva

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Posted May 09 2012 - 01:14 AM

Nice chapter, Gabriella. My constant nagging finally got to you, I see!

 

I particularly liked Gerlicky's random discussion of profiles and passwords, and the crew's reactions to it. Also, I think this is the longest chapter of anything I've seen you write yet. Nice job! You're starting to write more and more like me every day, weird... :blink:

 

Now I don't have an excuse for neglecting this comedy any more. I'll try to get the next chapter up within the next few days, provided BZP doesn't crash again or anything.

 

:mirunu: Lewa0111 Nuva :mirunu:


Edited by Lewa0111 Nuva, Sep 19 2014 - 03:30 AM.

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My Script Comedies: | The Nuva Inn Remake | Ask Matau! Remake (ACCEPTING QUESTIONS!) |
My Prose Comedies: | The BZ-Nui Hack Wars | Mata Nova |

 

"You know what? We haven't checked on the three running the Inn in a while. (Ha ha, "inn in!") I wonder how they're doing?"

 

"IS THIS REALLY THE TIME!?"

 

--Lewa0111 and Matau, The Nuva Inn, Chapter 33

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lewa# Studios Holiday Series continues with A Thanksmatau Day Feast!


#38 Offline Toa Sonis

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Posted May 09 2012 - 03:23 PM

Wow...a Lewa0111 comedy with a plot! I like how it still manages to retain its random flavor, though. Hilarious!
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I shall be saying this with a sigh
somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by
and that has made all the difference.

-Robert Frost, The Road Less Traveled

#39 Offline Festus Flare

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Posted May 29 2012 - 12:28 PM

Well, looks like the Randomness Warriors are in a terrible jam. Also, why do I get the feeling the story is both going to end soon but is still a long way from being completed? Weird.
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Posted Image

It's the city of New New York! Strictly speaking, it's the fifteenth New York since the original, so that makes it New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New-New New York

~The Doctor~


#40 Offline Endless Sea (still alive)

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Posted Jun 26 2012 - 09:05 PM

Good thing revival is allowed for Library topics, I guess. Holy Artakha, I'm in a comedy? Without even having to do any work? This is made of SO MUCH WIN I don't even know what to do with all of it.Right, I suppose re-introductions are necessary? Endless Sea, formerly Alaki Nuva, at thine service. Glad to see this comedy's going again, 'cause now I have that much more incentive to actually post on BZP. Woohoo!(Interestingly, the way I envision my virtual persona, his powers include, among other things, MASSIVE MENTAL BARRIERS like the Order of Mata Nui has, but, like, SO much stronger, so any method of mind control besides hacking would pretty much not have worked. Coincidence? I THINK NOT except yeah it totally was :P )
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I'd actually have something of substance to say here, but I'm too lazy to think of anything.  >_< Er, have some BZPRPG profiles, I guess?

 

I used to help Dominus Temporis with writing MLWTB back in the day, even if I was really terrible at it.  If anyone's in contact with him, could ya help me get in touch?   :)





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