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Review Topic--The Return of the Toa

Toa Return Megazordman1 The review

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#1 Online TheMegazordman1

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Posted Jul 28 2014 - 12:11 AM

Hello this is the Review topic for my Epic , The Return Of The Toa. 

 

This Story is about 3 matoren that are pushed in to a adventure when the Makuta Returns to plague the world again but this time with 12 new allies .

 

number of parts so far 2

 

Characters  

 

Ry- A Po-Matoren with a love for adventure and building things he has  a great interest in the legends of the toa told by the turaga and wishes that he could some day be one if they really ever existed.

 

14587556417_9506ed26bd.jpgReturn of the Toa mocs by The MegazordMan, on Flickr

 

 

Asa-  A Ga-Matoren who is Ry`s best friend and room mate since their time in school they both work at Kardi labs  her job being a tour guide to field trips of young matoren and Igori .  She does not believe in the legends of the Toa and is very protective of Ry.

 

14773668722_3bcef5652a.jpgReturn of the Toa mocs by The MegazordMan, on Flickr

 

Tor- A Ta-Matoren that Works as a security guard at Kardi Labs and  a crack shot with his plasma pistol . He  has been trained by the New Metru Nui task force a team of highly trained professional warriors and guards  .

 

14770900421_d9bb326c43.jpgReturn of the Toa mocs by The MegazordMan, on Flickr

 

Idure-A fellow scientist to Ry at Kardi labs. He discovered  a strange green glowing stone and found that it housed great energy  and in his quest to use this energy he lost his mind to the power and became The makuta known a Iduran .

 

14587493737_1693f5c5bd.jpgReturn of the Toa mocs by The MegazordMan, on Flickr

 

Makuta Iduran - The Mutated form of Idure  he has powers not seen in thousands of years and due to damage done to him by Tor he has a damaged kanohi revealing a horribly mutated face beneath it .

 

 

 

This post will be updated as the series go`s on including new characters and new episodes . 

 

So Feel free to tell me what you think and don`t hold back . I can take it .


Edited by TheMegazordman1, Jul 29 2014 - 12:48 AM.

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#2 Offline LordofBionicles

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Posted Jul 28 2014 - 10:28 AM

I think it's a nice story, I´m sure you'll reveal more of what happened in the last act in future chapters so there is still much to discover, I do recommend you to develop a little more your character Idure, you should show a bit more of his motivation towards what he has decided to do so that we can understand him better.


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#3 Online TheMegazordman1

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Posted Jul 28 2014 - 05:09 PM

I think it's a nice story, I´m sure you'll reveal more of what happened in the last act in future chapters so there is still much to discover, I do recommend you to develop a little more your character Idure, you should show a bit more of his motivation towards what he has decided to do so that we can understand him better.

I will most certainly do so mostly in flash backs but also with conversations between him and other characters  .


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#4 Online TheMegazordman1

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Posted Jul 29 2014 - 06:18 PM

new scenes up now .


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