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TheGeekIgnika

Honest Trailers: BIONICLE

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This is a tribute to the amazing Youtube channel Screen Junkies.  Please watch them.  Just know, if you are under 12 years of age, it might be a little too inappropriate.  Please fix if you are better at humor than me.

 

In a world where biomechanical beings live their life serving a giant robot that they call home, until an apocalyptic event causes them to move to the surface, where they start being menaced by the same being that caused the apocalyptic event, until bigger biomechanical beings defeat him and escape back to the workplace, where they work for a dead robot they call home, and new bigger biomechanical beings go off on a journey to make the dead robot alive, and they go underwater, and the original biomechanical beings end up actually doling the saving, and the bad guy is the giant robot, and the true robot gets sent to a post-apocalyptic planet, where he becomes another giant robot, kills the other one, and everyone lives happily ever after.  Whew!  That's a complicated story!  Wait, what?!  That was a SIMPLIFIED version?!  Oh, geez.

 

BIONICLE.

 

Team up with our arrogant fire-wielding hero.  Or our heroic light-wielding hero.  Or our naive fire-wielding hero.  Or our amazing fire-wielding hero.  Or our original arrogant fire-wielding hero who had some character development and became a heroic hero.  Or our wise/unknowing life-wielding outcast, as they fight against the evil Makuta Teridax, whose name reveal caused people to partially hate the guy who did it, and yet they suddenly love him when the story stops.

 

A franchise so beloved and creative, it sparked a slew of fanfics, MOCs, creative analyses, and entire new websites, only to be given the axe in favor of another franchise geared towards 8-year olds that is already running out of ideas.  I mean, seriously? Underground monsters?  You've got to be kidding me.

 

Witness the peril.  Witness the danger.  Witness the romance that everyone loved, but was de-canonized.  Come on, Greg!

 

This epic storyline is spread over nine whole years!  Including...

 

The one that began the "chronicle".

The one that started the theme of re-used characters.

The one with the underwhelming savior.

The flashback.

The totally-not-a-ripoff-of-Star-Wars-3.

The dark and scary one.

The unnecessary underwater one.

The epic one where the most epic stuff comes from online only.

The one with the kinda bad movie.

And the one that left me crying like a newborn.

 

Starring:

 

You know what, I refuse to do this part.  There are way too many.  Ugh.

 

The Best LEGO Theme Ever.

 

So if this is so good, why was it cancelled?  To save packaging?  They're cheap.

Edited by TheKanohiIgnika
  • Upvote 12

TheGeekIgnika, the caffeinated cyber-ninja.  Or just some idiot with a computer.  You choose.


 


If I sounded like a geek in this


 


post, you are correct.


 


"Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection.  It means never having to play it cool about about how much you like something.  It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult.  Being a geek is extremely liberating." - Simon Pegg


 


99% of BZPower has grown out of this pointless fad. If you're part of the 1% willing


to cling to it out of an irrational pseudo-nostalgia, copy and paste this into your signature!


 


Everybody is entitled to an opinion.  Even me.

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This is great! Please make an actual video of this.

 

Slightly off topic, is it sad I read all that in the honest trailers voice? :P

Same at least for the second part. I'm having trouble finding the pacing in the first paragraph.

Edited by CrunchbiteNuva

"I could have been a Protector but then I took a stud to the feet."

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I think it was rather short, It would be great if it explained a bit more so as to make more jokes about some of the storylines or characters, nice work anyway!

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I read this in his voice as well. Really funny. You should have done a quick run through of the years, just to make it a bit longer. However, you totally nailed the style of their script and it was quiet fun to read!



“We all change. When you think about it, we're all different people all through our lives. And that's okay. That's good. You gotta keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be."

-The Doctor

 

 

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You should have done a quick run through of the years, just to make it a bit longer. However, you totally nailed the style of their script and it was quiet fun to read!

Thanks!  I just edited it with that added.

This is great! Please make an actual video of this.

Good idea!  I will once I get a Youtube channel.

Edited by TheKanohiIgnika

TheGeekIgnika, the caffeinated cyber-ninja.  Or just some idiot with a computer.  You choose.


 


If I sounded like a geek in this


 


post, you are correct.


 


"Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection.  It means never having to play it cool about about how much you like something.  It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult.  Being a geek is extremely liberating." - Simon Pegg


 


99% of BZPower has grown out of this pointless fad. If you're part of the 1% willing


to cling to it out of an irrational pseudo-nostalgia, copy and paste this into your signature!


 


Everybody is entitled to an opinion.  Even me.

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"A franchise so beloved and creative, it sparked a slew of fanfics, MOCs, creative analyses, and entire new websites, only to be given the axe in favor of another franchise geared towards 8-year olds that is already running out of ideas." 

 

Sums up BIONICLE perfectly... best quote from this work! :)

  • Upvote 1


“We all change. When you think about it, we're all different people all through our lives. And that's okay. That's good. You gotta keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be."

-The Doctor

 

 

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Capital execution! I read this all in the trailer voice!

 

But about the cast list...actually, they did a "Starring" list for ALL 151 Pokemon for their Honest Pokemon trailer, which was honestly the funniest part of the trailer. So here are a few (mediocreish) examples? Of course, limiting the cast list to characters with sets might be a good idea, too.

 

Onua Nuva: Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Roodaka: Bewbs (Another running Honest Trailers gag)

Turaga Dume: Doom

Morbuzakh: Audrey Two

Gadunka: More Teeth than the Osmond Family

 

Yes, those are pretty bad, but keep in mind that EVERYONE in the Starring lists is treated like this. And there are a LOT of references.

  • Upvote 1

Do NOT bypass the filter. -B6

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What if it were only the canister sets and titans?

 

Starring:

My Hand is on Fire

Captain Hooks

Grinning Axe Murderer

Four-Eyes

Soccer Player

Underground Wolverine

Giant Bugs

Giant Scorpions

Giant Crabs

Treadmill Tiger

Rock-Em Sock-Em Dragons

Bakugan 

Left Hook

Jaeger

Category 1 Kaiju

Lava Surfboard!!!

Propeller Hands

Are Those Supposed to be Wings?

Huge Ice Skates

Football Player

Texas Chainsaw Massacre

More Bakugan

Definitely Bad Guys

Airplane Bird

Some Kind of Crab Maybe

Futuristic Sled

Evil Guy

Ultimate Frisbee

Fish Head
Ok, These are Wings
Spiky Waffle Irons
Head is a TV
This is not a Drill
Insecticons
Rhino Kangaroo
Half a Scorpion
Spare Parts
Bird With a Guy Stuck in it
DOOOOM!
Robot Mutants
More Giant Bugs
Gas Mask
Cyclops
Bewbs
Lizard Gangsters
Laser Guns
Perpetual Expression of Surprise
The Hulk... With an Axe.
Guy On Roller Skates
This isn't Even my Final Form
(This is)
Red Cthulhu
Anorexic Underwater Mantis
Too Many Spikes
Shark Fin Soup
Crab-Man
The Thing from Beneath the Sea
The Other Thing from Beneath the Sea
Cannon Crab Sidekick
Winged Scuba Diver
Trigger-Happy
Slouchy
Axe Face
Riot Shield
Made of Knives
Underwater Dog Sidekick
More Teeth than the Osmond Family
Futuristic Sled No.2
What is Even Going on Here
 
 
...Ok, I'm out.
  • Upvote 4

( The bunny slippers hiss and slither into the shadows. ) -Takuaka: Toa of Time

What if the Toa you know best were not destined to be? Interchange: The epic begins

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Capital execution! I read this all in the trailer voice!

 

But about the cast list...actually, they did a "Starring" list for ALL 151 Pokemon for their Honest Pokemon trailer, which was honestly the funniest part of the trailer. So here are a few (mediocreish) examples? Of course, limiting the cast list to characters with sets might be a good idea, too.

 

Onua Nuva: Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Roodaka: Bewbs (Another running Honest Trailers gag)

Turaga Dume: Doom

Morbuzakh: Audrey Two

Gadunka: More Teeth than the Osmond Family

 

Yes, those are pretty bad, but keep in mind that EVERYONE in the Starring lists is treated like this. And there are a LOT of references.

 

 

 

What if it were only the canister sets and titans?

 

Starring:

My Hand is on Fire

Captain Hooks

Grinning Axe Murderer

Four-Eyes

Soccer Player

Underground Wolverine

Giant Bugs

Giant Scorpions

Giant Crabs

Treadmill Tiger

Rock-Em Sock-Em Dragons

Bakugan 

Left Hook

Jaeger

Category 1 Kaiju

Lava Surfboard!!!

Propeller Hands

Are Those Supposed to be Wings?

Huge Ice Skates

Football Player

Texas Chainsaw Massacre

More Bakugan

Definitely Bad Guys

Airplane Bird

Some Kind of Crab Maybe

Futuristic Sled

Evil Guy

Ultimate Frisbee

Fish Head
Ok, These are Wings
Spiky Waffle Irons
Head is a TV
This is not a Drill
Insecticons
Rhino Kangaroo
Half a Scorpion
Spare Parts
Bird With a Guy Stuck in it
DOOOOM!
Robot Mutants
More Giant Bugs
Gas Mask
Cyclops
Bewbs
Lizard Gangsters
Laser Guns
Perpetual Expression of Surprise
The Hulk... With an Axe.
Guy On Roller Skates
This isn't Even my Final Form
(This is)
Red Cthulhu
Anorexic Underwater Mantis
Too Many Spikes
Shark Fin Soup
Crab-Man
The Thing from Beneath the Sea
The Other Thing from Beneath the Sea
Cannon Crab Sidekick
Winged Scuba Diver
Trigger-Happy
Slouchy
Axe Face
Riot Shield
Made of Knives
Underwater Dog Sidekick
More Teeth than the Osmond Family
Futuristic Sled No.2
What is Even Going on Here
 
 
...Ok, I'm out.

 

These are both great suggestions!  Mind if I use these?  Also, Akavakaku, can you put a guide as to what characters you're referring to?  That would be great.

Edited by TheKanohiIgnika

TheGeekIgnika, the caffeinated cyber-ninja.  Or just some idiot with a computer.  You choose.


 


If I sounded like a geek in this


 


post, you are correct.


 


"Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection.  It means never having to play it cool about about how much you like something.  It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult.  Being a geek is extremely liberating." - Simon Pegg


 


99% of BZPower has grown out of this pointless fad. If you're part of the 1% willing


to cling to it out of an irrational pseudo-nostalgia, copy and paste this into your signature!


 


Everybody is entitled to an opinion.  Even me.

Share this post


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What if it were only the canister sets and titans?

 

Starring:

My Hand is on Fire

Captain Hooks

Grinning Axe Murderer

Four-Eyes

Soccer Player

Underground Wolverine

Giant Bugs

Giant Scorpions

Giant Crabs

Treadmill Tiger

Rock-Em Sock-Em Dragons

Bakugan 

Left Hook

Jaeger

Category 1 Kaiju

Lava Surfboard!!!

Propeller Hands

Are Those Supposed to be Wings?

Huge Ice Skates

Football Player

Texas Chainsaw Massacre

More Bakugan

Definitely Bad Guys

Airplane Bird

Some Kind of Crab Maybe

Futuristic Sled

Evil Guy

Ultimate Frisbee

Fish Head

Ok, These are Wings

Spiky Waffle Irons

Head is a TV

This is not a Drill

Insecticons

Rhino Kangaroo

Half a Scorpion

Spare Parts

Bird With a Guy Stuck in it

DOOOOM!

Robot Mutants

More Giant Bugs

Gas Mask

Cyclops

Bewbs

Lizard Gangsters

Laser Guns

Perpetual Expression of Surprise

The Hulk... With an Axe.

Guy On Roller Skates

This isn't Even my Final Form

(This is)

Red Cthulhu

Anorexic Underwater Mantis

Too Many Spikes

Shark Fin Soup

Crab-Man

The Thing from Beneath the Sea

The Other Thing from Beneath the Sea

Cannon Crab Sidekick

Winged Scuba Diver

Trigger-Happy

Slouchy

Axe Face

Riot Shield

Made of Knives

Underwater Dog Sidekick

More Teeth than the Osmond Family

Futuristic Sled No.2

What is Even Going on Here

Tahu, Gali, Lewa, Kopaka, Pohatu and Onua Mata

Nui-Rama, Nui-Jaga, Manas, Muaka/Kane-Ra, Tavakara

Bohrok, Boxor, Exo-Toa, Bahrag

Tahu, Gali, Lewa, Kopaka, Pohatu and Onua Nuva

Bohrok Kal, Rahkshi, Gukko/Jaller, Takua/Pewku, Takanuva/Ussanui, Makuta

Vakama, Nokama, Matau, Nuju, Onewa and Whenua Metru

Vakhi, Lhikan/Kikanalo, Nidhiki, Krekka, Dume/Nivawk, Ultimate Dume

Toa Hordika, Visorak, Sidorak, Keetongu, Roodaka

Piraka, Toa Inika, Brutaka, Axonn, Umbra, Vezon/Fenrakk, Vezon/Kardas

Kalmah, Takadox, Ehlek, Pridak, Carapar, Mantax, Nocturn

Jaller, Hahli, Kongu, Matoro, Hewkii, Nuparu Mahri

Hydraxon, Maxilos/Spinax, Gadunka, Lesovikk, Karzahni/Sarda/Idris

Anyone who wants to add 2008-2010, go ahead.

  • Upvote 1

( The bunny slippers hiss and slither into the shadows. ) -Takuaka: Toa of Time

What if the Toa you know best were not destined to be? Interchange: The epic begins

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Thanks a lot!


TheGeekIgnika, the caffeinated cyber-ninja.  Or just some idiot with a computer.  You choose.


 


If I sounded like a geek in this


 


post, you are correct.


 


"Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection.  It means never having to play it cool about about how much you like something.  It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult.  Being a geek is extremely liberating." - Simon Pegg


 


99% of BZPower has grown out of this pointless fad. If you're part of the 1% willing


to cling to it out of an irrational pseudo-nostalgia, copy and paste this into your signature!


 


Everybody is entitled to an opinion.  Even me.

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Thank you so much to everyone who helped out.  I will include all your names in the credits of the video.   :)


TheGeekIgnika, the caffeinated cyber-ninja.  Or just some idiot with a computer.  You choose.


 


If I sounded like a geek in this


 


post, you are correct.


 


"Being a geek is all about being honest about what you enjoy and not being afraid to demonstrate that affection.  It means never having to play it cool about about how much you like something.  It's basically a license to proudly emote on a somewhat childish level rather than behave like a supposed adult.  Being a geek is extremely liberating." - Simon Pegg


 


99% of BZPower has grown out of this pointless fad. If you're part of the 1% willing


to cling to it out of an irrational pseudo-nostalgia, copy and paste this into your signature!


 


Everybody is entitled to an opinion.  Even me.

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This is hilarious!  There were so many funny things, from the "simplified" version of all the ridiculous giant robot plots to the part about Makuta's name reveal to the part about Bionicle's (lack of) romance! :P And there are too many characters. :P

 

Great job! :)

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What if there was also a mask list?

 

mask of introvertedness(Crast)

 

mask of flashlight(Ruru)

 

upgraded Miru (Kadin)

 

mask of what is that?!?(Mistika Kaukau)

 

not-Vahi(Pantoka kakama)

 

mask of Ant man(Pehkui)

 

rip-off Huna(Volitak)

 

mask of messed-up timestreams(Mohtrek) 

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