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Ask Vezon (Unfortunately) TWO!

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It's Party Time!

 

 

 

Welcome, one and none, to Ask Vezon TWO, the comedy controlled by you, the suckers fans.

Now, before I hit to the story, here's the rules:

 

Rule #1: Go crazy with questions.

If you ask something reasonable, Vezon will kill you.

 

Rule #2: Obey all BZP rules, guidelines, and moderators.

Even if Vezon says no.

 

Rule #3: Obey all rules.

That is all.

 

 

 

 

 

Hit to the story

 

 

Vezon sat on the curb, plotting what to do with his "pitiful" existence. He had tried being friendly to that sap Ghidora131, but it failed. Slumping down, he figured he could stop playing with the dead canary now.

 

Snapping up straight, he had a brilliant thought: Why not go rule that loser Ghidora again? If it worked once it could work twice.

 

Three hours later, Vezon tore the door to Ghidora's small, humble establishment and screamed "I'M BACK, BRO!!! LET'S GET THE DISCO MOUNTED TO YOUR HEAD AND HAVE A PARTY!!!" Ghidora, being rather traumatized after the last meeting, promptly let out a tiny girly scream and fainted. Vezon proceeded to take over the entire dwelling, and this is where I am at now. Call the cops! He's eating all my tofu! HELP!!!

 

 

All right all you insanity lovers, This time around Vezon's working a little differently. You ask a question, it turns into a skit where Vezon tries to figure it out. Special characters will be appearing, each one a little different. Now and then, I will choose a random (Un)lucky member who has asked a question and personify them in one of Vezon's little temper tantrums.

Example:

 

Q: Can you really digest corn?

 

A: Vezon stared at the computer screen and stared at the computer screen and stared at the computer...

And then decided to try it out.

 

Then, Tahu (How he got there, I dunno) stopped Vezon. "Hold it! You've caused so many nightmares in little kids with your last ask series, and too many ears bled at the beginning of this intro? What are you intending now, you sick freak?"

 

Vezon spewed out some senselessness and then hopped in the car. Driving to the store, he proceeded to steal a corncob. He then drove to Ghidora's house once again and got out the vinegar. "You see, So and so, it's like this. Your filthy stomach is full of vinegar. When you pour the vinegar on the corncob..." The corncob proceeded to turn to mushy gunk. "And that is your food in your intestine. Now, we take the mush, and put it in the microwave." He placed the slop into the microwave. "Set it for four hours on high," He said, setting it for thirty seconds on low. Tahu, still disbelieving, butted in. "In actuality, corn is too full of chemicals due to modern farming methods to be actually considered as food by that human body of yours, and- Mmph!" He abruptly finished when Vezon stuck the goopy, scalding mess in his open mouth. "And that is how your body digests Corn!" He finished, while Tahu proceeded to barf on the floor.

 

Well, what ye be waiting for? Get to the asking!

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Just a quick reminder though: It's been a long while since the first Ask Vezon, so could you ask some zany questions to get me back up to date?

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Alright, I'll ask the first question.

 

Vezon, what would you do if an unstoppable force met an immovable object?

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Everyone is one choice away from being the bad guy in another person's story.


 


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Toa Smoke Monster, on November 1st, 01:55 P.M., said:

 

What would you do if an unstoppable force met an immovable object?

 

 

 

DINNER TIME

 

Vezon was on facebook, making artificial users and hooking them up to the mafia, when he heard a horrifying noise. A terrible, squashing, grinding noise. His stomach was growling. Bursting downstairs, he ran to the fridge and opened it up, foamy drool streaming from his maw. Just then, Matoro was going to make dinner. He stopped short when he saw the rabid Skakdi clone, and said "Vezon I'm going to get the dinner, okay? I'll have it done soon, prob-"

 

Vezon turned at a grinding pace, and locked eyes with the ice Toa. He would have to proceeded to eat the nervous warrior when his computer beeped, meaning he had a BZP reply. "Oh, pardon me." he said as he walked upstairs like a civilized person, as Matoro sighed and got out the mop.

 

"All right, smoky the Toa, here's what happens. I'm sitting here at the table with my food." He sat at the table while Matoro, in a maid's uniform, handed him his Smoked turkey sandwich on Italian white bread with a side of fries and a nice, piping hot Café Latte. "Now, let's get an immovable object."

 

Later, Matoro stood on the sidewalk with food in hands, while Vezon went to the opposing side of the planet. He then called Matoro on the phone and told him to whisper "Vezon, I'm throwing you dinner away." After he did so, Vezon flew into a berserk rage and began tearing his way through the planet itself, ending up on the roadside near Matoro. He then grabbed his food. And while the planet began to erupt into flames, Vezon finished the statement:

 

"Well, that's what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object! Now, I'm going to have dinner." and he began to chow down, while the rest of the world began to die around him, and people ran around in circles.

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Ok..

 

1.) What do you think about all of my BFTGM entries?  I think the Exo-Skakdi might suit your fancy!

 

2.) Is Vezok= Vezon+ Sanity2?

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Add me on 3DS: 0516-7750-0068

Add me on Wii U: Boidoh

 

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 4: Never Trust a Snake

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 44: Corridor of Elders

Like, Comment, And Subscribe for Nintendo Content - NinBoidoh

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Boidoh, on November 1st, 08:32, said:

 

1.) What do you think of all my BFTGM entries? I think the Exo-Skakdi might suit your fancy!

 

2.) Is Vezok squared=Vezon squared+sanity squared?

 

 

 

 

 

 

BUCKETS AND MATH

 

 

 

Vezon had just finished scamming members of the Government when he got an e-mail from BZP. Thinking it was the enclosed check he was ranting for a while about, he immediately opened it, and screamed. Racing to the bottom of the stairs, he burst through the bathroom door, and found Kongu scrubbing the floor. "Some freak named Boidurrh or something like that just sent me pictures of monstrosities! You have to see them!" and he bolted up the stairs, Kongu muttering something about mental psychopaths owning comedies. At the computer, Kongu and Vezon looked upon the MOCs made by Boidurrh or something like that. "How monstrous... How hideous... They're... They're beautiful!" And he hugged Kongu and cried. Kongu groaned, pulled Vezon off him, and said "Goodbye." and walked back downstairs.

 

"Wait, wut's dat?" Vezon peered towards the screen to see: Vezok Squared = Vezon Squared + Sanity Squared

 

"Whaaaaat!?"

 

 

"Okay, math lesson, Boidurrh or something like that. You see, Vezon = Vezok + Sanity + wittiness + Intelligence + Good looks + Charm + Swag + Munies + Rare blood + Getspawnedfromsomeonelesserthanyou + Cute. It was probably a mistake this time, but it had better not happen again, because:

 

"Anyone who lowers me down so ever again gets a Mango fused with Mint leaves up their left nostril while Ballet dancing in an afro in front of the entire Skakdi race and Gadunka's rotting corpse!"

 

 

 "Well, thanks for coming! (frilly flowers) :D

Edited by ghidora131
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OK... 

 

Vezon, since you can hop between dimensions, have you ever visited Termina?

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Add me on 3DS: 0516-7750-0068

Add me on Wii U: Boidoh

 

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 4: Never Trust a Snake

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 44: Corridor of Elders

Like, Comment, And Subscribe for Nintendo Content - NinBoidoh

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Vezon,

 

If the moon was going to crash into the earth, Majora's Mask style, what would you do to stop it?

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Everyone is one choice away from being the bad guy in another person's story.


 


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Vezon, since you can hop between dimensions, have you ever visited Termina?

 

Vezon,

 

if the moon was going to crash into the earth, Majora's mask style, what would you do to stop it?

 

 

 

 

 

GRAB A SANDWICH

 

 

(Special "guest" Boidoh!)

 

Vezon had just finished raking his yard, using his staff. As he left the trench-filled grass pile and came inside, he saw Boidoh reading the newspaper. "Check this out, Vezon! Apparently there was a game known as Majora's mask! It looks really cool!" Vezon peered towards the paper and saw the word "Termina". After a few seconds, he teleported away, only to return an hour later in the sky with a ham sandwich, and the moon from Termina. He had saved link's world, but done something much worse.

 

Vezon landed like a graceful little butterfly, and greeted Boidoh. "Wow, termina is lame! At least I grabbed some lunch while I was over there."

 

"VEZON, YOU DOLT, YOU'RE GOING TO DESTROY THE EARTH!!!" screamed the good Boidoh  and the entire townspeople began to panic. Vezon thought quickly, and fused the mad-faced moon to the real moon. Now the whole moon had a tiny face, and was heading right towards the earth. It had also gained some mass, and Boidoh was about to blow his top once again. Vezon suddenly knew what he had to do. He ran towards the hardware store.

 

Inside, he stole bought:

 

A dozen screws

 

An air freshener

 

A D-battery

 

A circuit breaker

 

Duct tape

 

Racing back towards the house, Boidoh going unconscious, Vezon quickly grabbed the air freshener. He chucked it at the moon. It somehow reached space and collided with our lunar monstrosity. The entire thing defused, and the air freshner flew into space, followed by the Termina moon.

 

"And you see, kids, it liked the smell so much it followed the freshener when I threw it." said sir ego-Skakdi. "And that is how I save the world! Now, go away. I'm having lunch." and he began to chow down on the sandwich.

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Good Sir,

Can you check out the World of Annona's Doom to see how Annona is doing? Thanks...

Also, what would happen if the moon from Termina replaced Bota Magna, and Mata Nui reunited Aqua Magna, Bara Magna, and Termina's moon. If you don't know, just travel to Termina, take the moon, travel to an AU, then throw the moon at Bota Magna, knock it out of orbit from Solis Magna, make the Termina moon its own planet, wait until Mata Nui takes control of the prototype robot, fight teridax, reformation, happy ending, Spherus Magna has a face! Right?

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Add me on 3DS: 0516-7750-0068

Add me on Wii U: Boidoh

 

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 4: Never Trust a Snake

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 44: Corridor of Elders

Like, Comment, And Subscribe for Nintendo Content - NinBoidoh

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What would happen if the moon from Termina Blah blah blah right?

 

Vezon, what would you do if you ate the Mask of Ultimate power by mistake?

 

 

 

 

THE POWER OF FACE

 

 

Vezon checked his measurements again for the 28th time. He was 104% correct. "See, I told you toothpicks are electromagnetic!" he shouted, and grinned. The one he was shouting to went by the name Nidhiki. "Come on, can't we do something else? We've been sitting here for two hours arguing about-"

 

BZP replied. Vezon darted over and saw the question from his previous guest Boidoh. "Say what?" he questioned as he wrote everything down. "Hm. But the Termina moon is way too small to fit in the major hole in the side of the planet, so that would leak lava everywhere, resulting in the planet becoming a massive pile of smoldering ground! Man, I love it! Uggh, I'm hungry. Go make me a burger."

 

Grumbling downstairs, Nidhiki angrily cooked a hamburger. But as he got ready to prepare it, He saw the Mask of Ultimate power sitting casually on Vezon's shelf next to Stormer's head. He quickly swiped it and stared mouth open. He heard a creak. Vezon was approaching. Thinking fast, he slipped it under a lip in the tablecloth. But as Vezon emerged from the stairs, he realized that wasn't a tablecloth. That was the Burger bun.

 

"Yummy!" said Vezon and gobbled down the sandwich. He then proceeded to glow different colors, all while burping extensively. "Wow, (burp) I must have had too (burp) much air in that (burp) burger!) Nidhiki ran from the house screaming as Vezon tore through the roof, power flowing around him. He flew around the 2,683 times in one second. "I FEEL GREAT! I'M GOING TO CARVE THE MOON IN MY IMAGE!" And he concentrated, and the rock on the moon turned into the form of Vezon's head. Just then, his stomach finished digesting the Mask. He had a sonic burp, and fell to earth.

 

Later that night, people everywhere gazed at the moon, now with the face of Vezon, and questioned the sanity of this writer.

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Do you watch TTV?

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Add me on 3DS: 0516-7750-0068

Add me on Wii U: Boidoh

 

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 4: Never Trust a Snake

"I am Lloyd Garmadon, son of Lord Garmadon." - Lloyd, Episode 44: Corridor of Elders

Like, Comment, And Subscribe for Nintendo Content - NinBoidoh

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Do you watch TTV?

 

 

 

 

WORLD 2-4

 

Vezon was almost there. He was downstairs playing Super Marlo bro$ 4 and was almost to the end, just tackling the final boss, Howzer, king of the Borshts. And he was almost there...

 

(Dies)

 

"RRAAAAAGGGGGGGEEEEEE!!!" yeled the happy Vezon as he burst into a temper tantrum. Botar, sitting at the table eating cereal and taku eggs, jolted and backhanded Vezon when he came close. "For the love of Mata Nui, will you stop that ranting!? I'm trying to enjoy a peaceful morning without the interruptions of a maniac! Now can you do something else please?" Vezon shut the TV off and grumbled upstairs. He had a seat next to his computer and wondered what was on Twoyube, the online video site. He found something that said "Bionicle" and he quickly watched it. It was made by a group known as The Three Virtues and they were-

 

"Okay hold it! Now for my side of the story! Now, THEY said that Bionicle 2015 has 'been officially confirmed' and set pics are released as evidence! WELL GUESS WHAT Duh tree Vitruvius! I made those pics, masterminded everything at comiccon, designed the phony sets, and MADE THE ENTIRE FLIPPING WEBSITE, THAT'S WHAT! And I deserve full credit for also being the obvious villain In the series! Can you please get a life and let the guy who knows something SAY THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER!?"

 

Botar appeared behind Vezon and growled. "What did I tell you, worm?... I... Said... QUIET!!!" He hoisted Vezon by the back of the neck and threatened to crack it, when he saw the screen. "Ooh, Bionicle 2015! I had rumors about this... It's confirmed? Wow! I gotta call LEGO and ask them for a returning roll!" And as he dashed to the downstairs phone, Vezon leaned on his desk and grumbled.

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Vezon,

 

would you prefer that you left arm be a regular arm or an Ax arm?

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Everyone is one choice away from being the bad guy in another person's story.


 


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Would you prefer that your left arm be a regular arm or an axe arm?

 

 

 

 

THE TRAMFORMERS

 

 

Vezon looked at the cartoon on Twoyube, the one made by HARSBO. One of the main characters spoke up. "I am Optimist prime, leader of the Helpfulbots. We fight an eternal war against Pessimitron and the Nohelpfulcons." The doorbell rang. Vezon grumbled downstairs and opened the door. Macku was there with Hahli, the Toa of water. "Hello," spoke Macku. "I am from the Ga-koro scouts baking group and we are here to sell you some cookies!" Vezon stared at Hahli. "Then why bring a Toa?" Macku immediately spoke up. "Um, the headmasters thought you were especially Dangerousl-"Hahli slapped her hand over the Ga-Matoran's mouth. "Friendly! Yes, dangerously friendly! Right, Macku?" Macku nodded, and was able to breath again. "All right, all right, i'll take two boxes."

 

Macku grabbed two Yummy Yums! boxes and handed them to Vezon. Vezon spoke like a full grown liar. "Oh, I'm so sorry, but I don't have any more money left. Will you accept some free... Punch instead?" Hahli grabbed her weapon. Macku said "Yes!" in the most naïve tone ever. Vezon went inside and returned with two glasses of punch. Macku took one, and Hahli demanded cold hard cash. Vezon gave her cold hard punch. "Let's see the neighbors fix that wall now!" Vezon said as he closed the door and munched away on Yummy Yums!. Suddenly, the door burst open, and Hahli growled angrily. "We sold you those, and you give us nothing but a whack in the jaw and a quick drink!?" Vezon swallowed the full mouth of Yummy Yums! he had, and grabbed an axe. He proceeded to realized he had no clue how to wield it, as it was heavier than him. He fused it to Hahli's arm, and it weighed her down. Grabbing a phone, he ordered six jumbo pizzas. Then, he unfused Hahli. The fusing/unfusing process had left her wide open, and he gave a falcon punch! and watched the roof of the house across the street implode. He closed the door.

 

And as he walked upstairs, he said: "Gee, I wish I never had an axe for an arm. How would I type?"

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say, I'd like to answer multiple questions at once, so if someone else is waiting to ask a question, don't wait! Ask away!

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You want another question? I can give you one.

 

Vezon, what would happen to you if you used the Spear of Fusion on yourself to split into two beings? Would you be even more insane, if such a thing were possible? Or would you be just two halves of current self?

  • Upvote 2

Everyone is one choice away from being the bad guy in another person's story.


 


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Vezon, is it true you are actually Vezok? and is it true you have a glowing medium azure tounge?

 

Vezon, what would happen if you used the Spear of Fusion on yourself? Would you be even more insane, if such a thing were possible? Or would you just be two halves of current self?

 

Has Tahu ever ate your lunch?

 

Vezon, what would you do if I entered you in BFTGM? and then broke you up into tiny pieces and used them to build something else?

 

Why do you assume Starbucks* and Subways* exist in the Bionicle universe?

 

How come so many of the posts have likes?

 

 

 

 

 

LISTEN TO MY FIST

 

Vezon came back from robbing shopping at the grocery store. He had lemons, sugar, roast beef, bread, a purse full of cash, a police car, a handgun, twenty-five fyrebush berries, and a hat. He proceeded to walk inside his (Ghidora's) house and dump all the cash from the purse on the table. Tahu, who was still there (for some reason) was hungry. He saw Vezon make a sandwich. Vezon proceeded to swipe all the cash and walk upstairs.

 

Tahu didn't care. He bolted to the table, and scarfed the sandwich down. He still had it in his mouth when he realized something. It tasted Terrible. He quickly snached it out of his mouth and threw it on the table.

 

Vezon arrived shortly after, only to find Tahu hacking out air and asking him "What was in that thing!?" Vezon smiled. "I made it for you! It's a purse lemon juice sandwich with a hat bun!" Tahu groaned, and saw Vezon holding a glass. "At least I made you this." he handed Tahu the glass. "Gee, thanks for the lemonade." said the Ta-Toa. "Silly Tahu, that isn't Lemonade!" said Vezon "It's Motor oil from the police car!"

 

Tahu spit repeatedly and rubbed his tounge off. "I have a LIFE, yah know!" He angrily protested, while pulling out his fire sword. "Too bad you won't, after I'm through with you for what you've done!" Vezon grabbed his staff of fusion. "Well, at least you're considerate." Tahu roared and flew at the ego-maniac. Vezon tried to fuse him, but instead shot the mirror. The blast defied physics and hit Vezon. He defused.

 

Both Vezons stared at one another. they tried speaking, but one only knew Swahili. They paced around each other, and then started to try to communicate to each other. The English half was suddenly different from before. It was intelligent. It immediately understood Swahili sign language, and communicated to the other one, while Tahu looked on amazed. Suddenly, both Vezons jumped him.

 

They tangled with him for a while, and then he grabbed the staff of fusion. The Toa aimed at the English Vezon. "I'm going to turn you so small, you'll be nothing but dust!" English Vezon shouted to Swahili Vezon "I say leap to me, old bean!" The two Skakdi touched as the staff fired on them. Vezon was whole once again.

 

He swiped the staff from Tahu and bonked him on the head repeatedly. "Bonkle bonkle bonkle!" he said as he raced upstairs and locked the door. He got on the computer, and after he stopped sitting on it, he looked at it. BZP had replied 22,000 times and almost all of them were discussions on how to ban Vezon. "They can't stop thinking abou-Hm?" he said as he saw a Battle for the gold mask entry: Vezon, master of lameness.

 

"What a terrible idea" he said and, hacking BZPower, he changed the entry to Vezon, king of the universe. There was a video included that showed someone crushing Vezon and making a Bionicle toilet out of his parts. He edited it to show a cartoon of Vezon turning the guy into a toilet. "Ha! maybe next time you wont doooo that!"

 

He also saw several questions asked to him, one being: Why do these posts have so many likes?

 

"Simple" answered Vezon "Like likes! AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA ZELDA JOKES AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!! So funny!"

 

 

 

 

 

"Laugh."

 

 

The next question was: Why do you assume Starbucks* and Subways* exist in the Bionicle universe?

 

"Oh, that's that sick freak Ghidora who assumes so. I KNOW they exist."

 

 

The final question was the most incredible: Are you actually Vezok? and is it true you have a glowing medium azure tounge?

 

Vezon stuck out his rainbow-chrome-fiery-magnificent-awesome-swagmaster tounge,and looked it. "No, I don't think so. And it is time you all find out the sad truth to this comedy." He grabbed the back of his false rubber mask and tore the whole thing off.

 

 

 

 

 

 

"I'M ACTUALLY..."

SPOILER ALERT

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"VEZON!!!"

 

*Starbucks is the property of Starbucks inc; and Subways is the property of Subways inc. This is placed here so they don't burn us up in their fiery rage :P

Edited by ghidora131

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Vezon is Vezon! Wake up, sheeple.

 

 Vezon, why don't you have a spine? Also, can you juggle planets made of lego parts while sitting on a rotating mirror, eating haggis and blowing your nose? (or lack thereof!)

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I HATE SCORPIOS


 


~Pohatu Master of Stone, 2015

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Vezon is Vezon! Wake up, sheeple.

 

 Vezon, why don't you have a spine? 

 

No one cared who he was until he put on the Olmak.

 

-Tyler

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whats up doc

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Intentional, yes. And I don't see how upvotes have destroyed this comedy, as people keep asking questions, waiting for this "sociopath" to answer them with corny humor and ridiculous scenes. I was warned well ago that this review would prove insulting, degrading, and make people not want to participate, but I wanted it anyway.

 

My stories have not defeated me, but they simply place my name; I wish to have these skits to continue but the original much more successful version had to be closed. It seems people prefer straight answers to skits.

 

And I intend to run Ask Vezon TWO for as long as it remains open, or until I can continue it elsewhere.

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