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whoookay, here goes.

 

 

Let's start with the easy stuff. First off, there's a reason double sided maces don't exist. They'd be too heavy and too short to be wielded in any effective manner. If you want something like that, a staff with weighted ends would serve the same general purpose. I'm not entirely sure why it has hooks in stead of regular spikes or being a bladed mace, either, if you could elaborate, that'd go a long way to an approval. If the intent is to hook opponent's limbs, then I'd suggest an axe, as that's a weapon that has historically been used for such things. in addition,. not sure why or how he'd use a mace for carving when he seems to have proper tools, but that's just me and doesn't actually effect the approval.

 

On to the more....complex things. I'm not sure how this scraper works, but it doesn't seem like a conventional rock tumbler, in that it uses metal blades rather than grit sandpaper and powder, and that it can apparently easily shred a metal hand apart. So I'm not too keen on that.

 

Good at hiding is sorta subjective, and I'm iffy on it, but if demonstrated properly I have no issues with. key word being properly. I expect research to be done.

 

Demeanor of a toddler.... What does that mean? Why is it there? You've already described him as friendly, and having an overall good demeanor. Was childlike the word you were looking for? Because toddler to me at least brings images of temperamental, mood swinging small children. Not that all toddlers are temper mental or moody, but the wording is just..... odd.

 

Being good enough to hide from fifteen separate people for over an hour? Noooot gonna fly. also iffy on that being enough to level him, given that from what I'm gathering he just..... stood really still and blended in somewhere for an hour?

 

In all, Tombstone is not approved, and needs some serious work.

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whoookay, here goes.

 

 

Let's start with the easy stuff. First off, there's a reason double sided maces don't exist. They'd be too heavy and too short to be wielded in any effective manner. If you want something like that, a staff with weighted ends would serve the same general purpose. I'm not entirely sure why it has hooks in stead of regular spikes or being a bladed mace, either, if you could elaborate, that'd go a long way to an approval. If the intent is to hook opponent's limbs, then I'd suggest an axe, as that's a weapon that has historically been used for such things. in addition,. not sure why or how he'd use a mace for carving when he seems to have proper tools, but that's just me and doesn't actually effect the approval.

 

On to the more....complex things. I'm not sure how this scraper works, but it doesn't seem like a conventional rock tumbler, in that it uses metal blades rather than grit sandpaper and powder, and that it can apparently easily shred a metal hand apart. So I'm not too keen on that.

 

Good at hiding is sorta subjective, and I'm iffy on it, but if demonstrated properly I have no issues with. key word being properly. I expect research to be done.

 

Demeanor of a toddler.... What does that mean? Why is it there? You've already described him as friendly, and having an overall good demeanor. Was childlike the word you were looking for? Because toddler to me at least brings images of temperamental, mood swinging small children. Not that all toddlers are temper mental or moody, but the wording is just..... odd.

 

Being good enough to hide from fifteen separate people for over an hour? Noooot gonna fly. also iffy on that being enough to level him, given that from what I'm gathering he just..... stood really still and blended in somewhere for an hour?

 

In all, Tombstone is not approved, and needs some serious work.

1. It has hooks to catch opponents, mainly, on exposed bits of flesh, if there be any. And the idea of a mace instead of a hooked spear or an axe was for carving, specifically mashing off larger parts of rock that didn't need to be part of the model. I'll cut that second end off the profile.

2. I'm not too fondly attached to scraper. If it proves too problematic for the approval I'll cut it out.

3. "The toddler years are a time of great cognitive, emotional and social development." Hence demeanor of a toddler. I'll reword that if it's going to be confusing for everyone.

4. I'll be honest, the backstory was the only part I really debated putting in, only in lack of a better one did it make it there. Ill scrap it and come up with something better in the next couple days.

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Carving stone is a fairly precise work, even large chunks are removed with hammer and chisel. 

 

The weapons enthusiast in me is saying no to that.... thing you're calling a mace. if you want to hook, stick with weapons designed(or at least by virtue of design) for it.

 

A mace is for crushing, or delivering a lot of force to a small area, hence the spiked or bladed mace. Hooks would just get caught in things, leading to not only your weapon being very easily taken from you unintentionally or it getting caught in things you don't want it caught in. Arguably less of an issue since we as characters don't wear clothing, but the point stands.

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Time to go to work...

Simply for the record, ditto on Luffy being an expy. Kri, on the other hand, gets an extra approved x3.

 

Hm, I'm tempted to take advantage of the reopening of profile approvals to flood this game with more pointless evil siblings. 

 

Go ahead. I'll just start smiting and reposting them all over in the HF RPG Discussion Topic for you to deal with later. :evilgrin:

 

Name: Tombstone

Variation: Magnetism

 

Level: 2

 

Gender: Male

 

Gear: He wields a massive double-ended metal mace which he uses mostly for carving jobs. It has twisted hooks instead of spikes, and streaks from wear. Two or three of the hooks have worn off from heavy work. He also has a set of carving tools, consisting of a worn dagger, an iron spike with a flat end, an odd stone used for sanding, a strip of leather for smoothing, and a satchel to hold them in. He also has a device called Scraper, a wooden box, which uses three manually-powered metal discs and water to smooth round stones to incredible levels. Get your hand caught in it, however, and you won't have much of a hand left. He's also incredibly good at hiding, and it would take a very keen eye to spot him out of a forest. A very keen one.

 

Appearance: Taller than most, more muscular than most. A flat gray, the colour rubbed out of his armour from experimentation. Large, powerful hands, worn with working on stone. A charming and keen face, betraying how good of a fighter he is.

 

Personality: He's tall, dashing, friendly, creative, inspiring, cheerful, loves to learn, and making new friends! everything you could ever want in an ally- of course, he's no good for any Makuta, that's for sure. He doesn't like to fight, he likes to carve and create, but he'll fight if he has to. And he's got a demeanor to match a toddler, but a brain to match the greatest sculptors of all time.

 

Bio:
Tombstone was a problem for Krika the moment he was made. He had the workings of a fighter - a good one, too - but he tried to avoid it whenever he could so he could smash rocks together. Thinking his spawn was mentally ill, he searched one day for him to put him in an experiment, but had to resort to using his powers to find him for how well he was hidden. He trained Tombstone's deceptive abilities to the fullest, training him to hide almost anywhere, which he proved in combat by deceiving a group of fifteen level ones for a full hour. This was the point he turned into a Level Two, and was shipped off with special care to Corpus Rahkshi - if you can find him.

 

Again, Strider beat me to the punch on pretty much everything related to this so far.

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Name: Rōzu
Variation: Darkness
Level: 2
Gender: Female
Gear: A couple of ornate fans with sharp edges that can be used for combat. Also has a long katana which she reserves for special circumstances.
 
Appearance: Vibrant rose red armour with black undertones. Her eyes are completely black and even seem to emanate darkness. Her armour also has shallow ornate carvings on it that add a certain oriental flair while not compromising its structural integrity in any serious capacity.
 
Personality: Rōzu is enigmatic and sheltered, and will not speak unless she has reason to. She seems to go by a code of honour, abstaining from using any more violence than needed, but will not hesitate to use lethal force if she deems it necessary.
 
Bio: Rōzu was born to an honourable makuta who controlled a chain of islands. How ever, one day, her makuta was murdered by another makuta who then proceeded to slaughtering her siblings and taking over her makuta's lands and resources, leaving her without a home. She eventually found her way to Corpus Rahkshi, vowing vengeance upon the makuta who wronged her.

Edited by Champion of Kaon

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DOES LUFFY GET NO LOVE?!

Just kidding.

Thanks for the constructive criticism, guys.  I'll get to fixing up Luffy right away; because it looks like there are still some problems.  Hopefully, by the time the day is out, he'll be approved and ready for use.  Key word "hopefully."

On a side note, how many approvals do we have to get before we're allowed to play as a character?

 

EDIT: OK, I got rid of the straw hat, made him less "super happy let's be friends everything's cool," removed the bit about accidental death, and fleshed out that one incident with that one Rahkshi with the sword.  Can I get another look at Luffy now?

Edited by capMARVELOUS

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Three approvals from our three GMs I would assume.

Edited by Champion of Kaon

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Name: Rōzu

Variation: Darkness

Level: 2

Gender: Female

Gear: A couple of ornate fans with sharp edges that can be used for combat. Also has a long katana which she reserves for special circumstances.

 

Appearance: Vibrant rose red armour with black undertones. Her eyes are completely black and even seem to emanate darkness. Her armour also has shallow ornate carvings on it that add a certain oriental flair while not compromising its structural integrity in any serious capacity.

 

Personality: Rōzu is enigmatic and sheltered, and will not speak unless she has reason to. She seems to go by a code of honour, abstaining from using any more violence than needed, but will not hesitate to use lethal force if she deems it necessary.

 

Bio: Rōzu was born to an honourable makuta who controlled a chain of islands. How ever, one day, her makuta was murdered by another makuta who then proceeded to slaughtering her siblings and taking over her makuta's lands and resources, leaving her without a home. She eventually found her way to Corpus Rahkshi, vowing vengeance upon the makuta who wronged her.

 

Seems okay to me.

Approved x1.

 

On a side note, how many approvals do we have to get before we're allowed to play as a character?

 

Three approvals from our three GMs I would assume.

 

Pretty sure you only really need 2/3. Unless I'm mistaken, that is, in which case, I'm off to a great start. Hopefully, someone else will either confirm or deny.

Speaking of which, I just took another look at Luffy, and, aside from the issues that were fixed, it's my professional opinion that he's spent enough time in the de-expyfication chamber as well. Approved x1.

Edited by Timageness

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Yeah, it requires each GM's approval.

 

Luffy looks good to me now, approved x2. I'm still not taking into account possible expyness though.

 

Tombstone, I too share Strider's concerns about.

 

 

Rōzu is approved x2.

Edited by Sergei Rahkmaninoff

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Name: Tombstone

 

Variation: Mind Reading

 

Level: 2

 

Gender: Male

 

Gear: He wields a massive metal mace which he uses mostly for carving jobs. It has several short, wide spikes on its surface, He also has a set of carving tools, consisting of a worn dagger, an iron spike with a flat end, an odd stone used for sanding, a strip of leather for smoothing, and a satchel to hold them in. He also has a device called Scraper, a wooden box, which uses three manually-powered stone discs clothed in leather - and a good source of water - that does a much better job of polishing and smoothing that the leather strip. Sadly, though, it's not very big, and the majority of what he makes can never fit inside.

 

Appearance: Taller than most, more muscular than most. A flat gray, the colour rubbed out of his armour from experimentation. Large, powerful hands, worn with working on stone. A charming and keen face, betraying how good of a fighter he is.

 

Personality: He's tall, dashing, friendly, creative, inspiring, cheerful, loves to learn, and making new friends! everything you could ever want in an ally- of course, he's no good for any Makuta, that's for sure. He doesn't like to fight, he likes to carve and create, maybe sometimes hunt - but he'll fight if he has to. And although his appearance is overly friendly and unassuming, he has a brain to match the greatest sculptors of all time.

 

Bio:

Tombstone was a problem for Krika the moment he was made. He had the workings of a fighter - a good one, too - but he tried to avoid it whenever he could so he could smash rocks together. Thinking his spawn was mentally ill, he searched one day for him to put him in an experiment, but had to resort to using his powers to find him for how well he was hidden. He trained Tombstone's deceptive abilities to the fullest, training him to hide almost anywhere, making him a brilliant hunter, strategist, hopefully to make up for how much he refused to compete. Eventually forcing him into combat without a choice in the matter, he proved well enough to earn level two and get shipped to Corpus.

If there's any more issues there, shout them out. Also, changed variant to mind-reading, because I'd probably find a way to screw up Magnetism.

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Speaking of which, I just took another look at Luffy, and, aside from the issues that were fixed, it's my professional opinion that he's spent enough time in the de-expyfication chamber as well. Approved x1.

Luffy looks good to me now, approved x1. I'm still not taking into account possible expyness though.

That's two for Luffy.  Come on, Strider, please say yes...

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Yeah, it requires each GM's approval.

 

Oh. Huh.

So what happens when one of us wants to introduce a new (student) character? Do they automatically start off with a +1 and only need two approvals? Because that really doesn't seem all that fair to everyone else...

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Idk, seems fair enough to me. So long as you guys don't start some kind of elitist clique, we should be good. 

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Sorry for the contradiction Timageness, I got that post off in rush on mobile and didn't see that you'd kapura'd me with a different answer. If I had I probably would have spoken differently.

 

I think we, the GMs, should try to make decisions collectively. Meaning, rather than just each independently evaluating a profile and it passing if it gets enough approvals, we should discuss it (and I'll PM you about how we might do that) and decide if it passes or not. Which might mean one of us is initially the only one who has problems with a character, or the only one who sees nothing wrong, but they would accept the judgement of the other two.

 

Until we figure that for sure, though, I thought all three was the safer option.

 

And given we've been appointed GMs, I think we know how to keep a profile reasonable, and will fully intend to. (I hope so, anyways.) So our profiles can start with our own approval, since we're expected not to submit anything that wouldn't deserve it. The risk there is in bias, but I don't think any of us would stubbornly reject justified criticism of a profile.

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Sorry for the contradiction Timageness, I got that post off in rush on mobile and didn't see that you'd kapura'd me with a different answer. If I had I probably would have spoken differently.

 

I think we, the GMs, should try to make decisions collectively. Meaning, rather than just each independently evaluating a profile and it passing if it gets enough approvals, we should discuss it (and I'll PM you about how we might do that) and decide if it passes or not. Which might mean one of us is initially the only one who has problems with a character, or the only one who sees nothing wrong, but they would accept the judgement of the other two.

 

Until we figure that for sure, though, I thought all three was the safer option.

 

And given we've been appointed GMs, I think we know how to keep a profile reasonable, and will fully intend to. (I hope so, anyways.) So our profiles can start with our own approval, since we're expected not to submit anything that wouldn't deserve it. The risk there is in bias, but I don't think any of us would stubbornly reject justified criticism of a profile.

I'm against the idea of a collective opinion on the matter, mostly because real problems might get overlooked because of opposing majority vote. It's much easier to voice it to the player at your leisure, and see if 1. The player recognizes it is a problem and tries to fix it/defend it, or 2. The rest of the GMs point out the matter of it being an issue/not being an issue based on the initial judgement, and the process intended for pubic viewing is kept for public viewing.

 

That's my two cents on the matter, although take it with a spoonful of salt, because coins usually don't have many minerals.

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While I'd prefer if he had a different name, I see no glariung issues with Luffy overall, so approved x3

Aaaaand three.  Let the games begin.

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Name: Dahl

 

Variation: Dodge

 

Level: 2

 

Gender: Male

 

Gear: Dahl carries a pair of scimitars, as well as a pair of thick leather gloves, with spikes embedded into them, and a set of throwing knives.

 

Appearance: Dahl is a slightly taller than average Rahkshi, primarily colored black with his lower arms and legs silver. His faceplate contains heavier armor than the rest of his body, which is also silver. From his lower forearms to his wrists, he has wrapped lightweight chains around him(he claims that this helps him somehow, but more than likely, he's just trying to be stylish). His eyes are a brilliant shade of blue.

 

Personality: Dahl can best be described as eccentric. Randomly cracking (rather bad-humoured) jokes. He likes to overexaggerate movements, and believes sarcasm is a positive teaching tool. He considers himself a sellsword, and will do work... For a price. He is extraordinarily dexterous, and, with his powers, could stand toe to toe with most Rahkshi. However, he often gets cocky in a fight, and will often take damage he could have easily avoided. The one thing he absolutely loathes is a spear user, as he calls it "a cheap weapon with no style."

 

Bio: Dahl's history is pretty standard. He was spawned from a lesser known Makuta, and after a bit of training, was shipped off to Corpus.

Edited by Sassy Dalmation

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Name: Tombstone

 

Variation: Mind Reading

 

Level: 2

 

Gender: Male

 

Gear: He wields a massive metal mace which he uses mostly for carving jobs. It has several short, wide spikes on its surface, He also has a set of carving tools, consisting of a worn dagger, an iron spike with a flat end, an odd stone used for sanding, a strip of leather for smoothing, and a satchel to hold them in. He also has a device called Scraper, a wooden box, which uses three manually-powered stone discs clothed in leather - and a good source of water - that does a much better job of polishing and smoothing that the leather strip. Sadly, though, it's not very big, and the majority of what he makes can never fit inside.

 

Appearance: Taller than most, more muscular than most. A flat gray, the colour rubbed out of his armour from experimentation. Large, powerful hands, worn with working on stone. A charming and keen face, betraying how good of a fighter he is.

 

Personality: He's tall, dashing, friendly, creative, inspiring, cheerful, loves to learn, and making new friends! everything you could ever want in an ally- of course, he's no good for any Makuta, that's for sure. He doesn't like to fight, he likes to carve and create, maybe sometimes hunt - but he'll fight if he has to. And although his appearance is overly friendly and unassuming, he has a brain to match the greatest sculptors of all time.

 

Bio:

Tombstone was a problem for Krika the moment he was made. He had the workings of a fighter - a good one, too - but he tried to avoid it whenever he could so he could smash rocks together. Thinking his spawn was mentally ill, he searched one day for him to put him in an experiment, but had to resort to using his powers to find him for how well he was hidden. He trained Tombstone's deceptive abilities to the fullest, training him to hide almost anywhere, making him a brilliant hunter, strategist, hopefully to make up for how much he refused to compete. Eventually forcing him into combat without a choice in the matter, he proved well enough to earn level two and get shipped to Corpus.

If there's any more issues there, shout them out. Also, changed variant to mind-reading, because I'd probably find a way to screw up Magnetism.

 

 

Seems okay now. Approved x2.

 

Name: Dahl

 

Variation: Dodge

 

Level: 2

 

Gender: Male

 

Gear: Dahl carries a pair of scimitars, as well as a single falchion. In addition to these blades, he possesses a pair of thick leather gloves, with spikes embedded into them, a set of throwing knives, and a Matoran-sized Avelyn. The Avelyn does not have the capabilities to do any serious damage to a Rahkshi, and is prone to malfunctioning.

 

Appearance: Dahl is a slightly taller than average Rahkshi, primarily colored black with his lower arms and legs silver. His faceplate contains heavier armor than the rest of his body, which is also silver. From his lower forearms to his wrists, he has wrapped lightweight chains around him(he claims that this helps him somehow, but more than likely, he's just trying to be stylish). His eyes are a brilliant shade of blue.

 

Personality: Dahl can best be described as eccentric. Randomly cracking (rather bad-humoured) jokes. He likes to overexaggerate movements, and believes sarcasm is a positive teaching tool. He considers himself a sellsword, and will do work... For a price. He is extraordinarily dexterous, and, with his powers, could stand toe to toe with most Rahkshi. However, he often gets cocky in a fight, and will often take damage he could have easily avoided. The one thing he absolutely loathes is a spear user, as he calls it "a cheap weapon with no style."

 

Bio: Dahl's history is pretty standard. He was spawned from a lesser known Makuta, and after a bit of training, was shipped off to Corpus.

 

Technically, this is mostly just a collection of various traits from across the Souls games that've been rolled up into a single character, so I don't think we can justifiably classify this as an expy.

The problem I have here is with the sheer amount of weaponry this guy is packing, along with the specifics of said weapons in question. As of right now, he has 5 - 7 currently on him (depending on whether or not you group the scimitars and gloves into one individual slot, respectively), including one which arguably relies on above-average tech and offers no explanation of how it came into his possession. To be perfectly honest, anything exceeding the 3 - 4 range should really only be acquired in-game.

 

Sorry for the contradiction Timageness, I got that post off in rush on mobile and didn't see that you'd kapura'd me with a different answer. If I had I probably would have spoken differently.

 

I think we, the GMs, should try to make decisions collectively. Meaning, rather than just each independently evaluating a profile and it passing if it gets enough approvals, we should discuss it (and I'll PM you about how we might do that) and decide if it passes or not. Which might mean one of us is initially the only one who has problems with a character, or the only one who sees nothing wrong, but they would accept the judgement of the other two.

 

Until we figure that for sure, though, I thought all three was the safer option.

 

And given we've been appointed GMs, I think we know how to keep a profile reasonable, and will fully intend to. (I hope so, anyways.) So our profiles can start with our own approval, since we're expected not to submit anything that wouldn't deserve it. The risk there is in bias, but I don't think any of us would stubbornly reject justified criticism of a profile.

 

Fair enough, I suppose. Three for three works until we can get everything else sorted out.

I'll be holding off on submitting stuff for my own personal use until then, though.

Edited by Timageness

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That's not at all what I was going for.

 

The only two things I'm pulling from Dark Souls is the Avelyn(which I can remove easily) and my intense dislike for spears in those games. Everything else... I've had the idea for this character for a surprisingly long time. A quick-fingered, nimble mercenary who has a taste for bad jokes. Playing as someone with no alliances but to themself has always been fun for me, and I thought that curved blade weapons would fit him more, what with his nimbleness.

 

As for him being a Dark Souls expy... A) Characters in Dark Souls have an incredible variety in weaponry, and B) he would literally have no personality, as the characters barely show any emotions during the sparse cutscenes.

 

In the end, I know it's your choice, but those are just my two cents on the issue.

 

EDIT: just saw the post above. Avelyn is gone.

Edited by Sassy Dalmation

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coincidences happen, I suppose. As to steps to approval, I'd agree his gear is a bit much. Getting rid of the crossbow is fine, but I'd also say to pick either the scimitars, or the falchion.

 

Or one of each. The gloves seem pretty standard fare, and the knives are fine, too. 

 

(I'd get into the argument about Dark Souls and character weaponry but it's a bit off topic so I'll leave it at I'll be watching the character closely once he's approved.)

 

Make those changes and you'll have an approved x1 from me.

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Tombstone looks okay now, approved x3. Just remember that his ability to hide isn't going to match that of a Chameleon Rahk.

 

Dahl's individual weapons are not unreasonable, but I agree that he just has too many for a new arrival. Like Scorp said, removing at least one of the three swords would be a good idea. If you must have more later for some reason, Corpus does have an armory.

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Ah. Sorry for the confusion, then.

Reading and posting while I'm on the verge of passing out obviously doesn't agree with me. Dahl approved x3.

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IC:

 

SWOOP

 

Right past Rōzu's head, swerving into the hall, and skidding onto the stone floor. I love this kind of thing.

 

I looked up with an expression of pleasure. I was finally here! After all this time of waiting... But there, the one I flew over. What could she want? Well, no point in standing around.

 

"Hello, sorry if I gave you a bit of a scare." I tried to smile. "You are?"

 

OOC:Interacting with Rozu.

 

Ghidora, did you forget to put your character's name into the IC? Who the heck are you playing there? 

 

Edited by Champion of Kaon

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Considering that the character in the post is a new arrival, and we've only approved one character for him recently, I think it's safe to assume that he's playing as Tombstone.

It probably just slipped his mind, due to the fact that it's been a while since any new profiles were approved. Personally, I'm still amazed at how long it's been myself.

Edited by Timageness

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Ghidora, did you forget to put your character's name into the IC? Who the heck are you playing there?

Considering that the character in the post is a new arrival, and we've only approved one character for him recently, I think it's safe to assume that he's playing as Tombstone.

It probably just slipped his mind, due to the fact that it's been a while since any new profiles were approved. Personally, I'm still amazed at how long it's been myself.

It's a habit of mine to start off new character's first posts without their names in the beginning of the post, although if they begin interaction in the first post I put their name in the OOC portion. I just forgot to this time; sorry.

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I feel like the situation in the Library is going to end with Grim rapidly getting ###### at Malady. Any bets?

I'll place 20 widgets on it.

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Wow, I go to sleep and wake up to find that my self-indulgent scuffle has broken out into the biggest bout of interaction this game has had in recent memory. I should make my characters argue more often...

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Wow, I go to sleep and wake up to find that my self-indulgent scuffle has broken out into the biggest bout of interaction this game has had in recent memory. I should make my characters argue more often...

That's what happens when absolutely nothing goes on for a long time

 

Pretty much anything would make people excited

 

Especially with these clowns in particular

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Wow, I go to sleep and wake up to find that my self-indulgent scuffle has broken out into the biggest bout of interaction this game has had in recent memory. I should make my characters argue more often...

Consider yourself the catalyst for getting this game back up and running.  I was just looking for someone to break me into the game, and you happened to start a fight with yourself.  So, thanks.

 

maybe it's just me returning to the game that's made this happen, you never know

Suuuuure it's just you, Miras.

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Woo, character development for Draco.

And then comes the part where Icarax hears his thoughts of rebellion and puts him on KP duty

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