bonesiii Posted December 23, 2014 Share Posted December 23, 2014 (edited) Welcome to voting for the seventh Storyline & Theories contest: Memoirs of the Dead! First, please vote in this poll before voting here. With that out of the way, make sure you read the entry in this category before voting. The voting will close on Thursday April 30, hopefully giving plenty of time to read the entries if you haven't already. [uPDATE: The administration has decided to reduce the amount of time for voting due to little activity since the initial voting. The new deadline is Thursday, March 5.] Note that not every category will have a winner; see the linked poll for details.Entry #1 -- Three on Three by Makuta Matata Edited February 16, 2015 by bonesiii The Destiny of Bionicle (chronological retelling of Bionicle original series, 9 PDFs of 10 chapters each on Google Drive): Part 1 - Warring with Fate | Part 2 - Year of Change | Part 3 - The Exploration Trap | Part 4 - Rise of the Warlords | Part 5 - A Busy Matoran | Part 6 - The Dark Time | Part 7 - Proving Grounds | Part 8 - A Rude Awakening | Part 9 - The Battle of Giants My Bionicle Fanfiction (Google Drive folder, eventually planned to have PDFs of all of it) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ALVIS Posted December 29, 2014 Share Posted December 29, 2014 While I liked some aspects of this story, I ultimately voted against it. The dynamics between Hydraxon and the Barraki seemed a little off to me; looking at "his" interactions with Pridak in Hydraxon's Tale, I doubt he would have ever bothered to share a story about unity and teamwork with his prisoners. The dialogue between the Toa Mata felt a little stale as well. "You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant." -- Harlan Ellison Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RahiSpeak Posted January 7, 2015 Share Posted January 7, 2015 (edited) I really liked your story; very well written; excellent variation in sentence structure and vocabulary. To me, the interaction between the Barraki and Hydraxon was actually quite nice; the way you articulated it and added details to the exchange. Perhaps the Toa's feelings about participating in Hydraxon's challenge were a little awkward, but I think you did a good job of smoothing it over. That was style. As for actual content, I liked your decicion to go over Hydraxon's trainor days rather than his time in the Pit. You also characterized Hydraxon well in that he is strong and tough, but with a gentler, even wiser side as a member of the Order should have. All in all, this was, and is, a surprisingly good story. You have a vote. Edited January 8, 2015 by RahiSpeak Bionicle Story Group (BSG) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts