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How Would YOU Write G2?


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I didn't mean it was G1 as in following the same storyline, I meant your story is a new story that's killed G1 like an Aztec priest and is now wearing its skin. Its not so much a reboot as a re-skinning, and barely that.

That's why I split everything up into three years. Also, a MNOG-esque game would be good to help with the other non-essential characters.....

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Finally, let's tackle the 'issue' of my jealousy. I am 24, almost twice TMS and your age. Am I jealous of something a 13-year-old wrot e in ten minutes and that another 13-year-old messed his pants over? No. Frankly, I've got bigger concerns.

 

Bigger concerns?  Like making sure your mom doesn't find out your on a forum for a kids toy line?

 

"but because he is a 13-year-old kid on the internet without life experience or real writing skill"

 

know ToaMarkSurge has a "life experience" and "real writing skill".  But what about YOU :glare: ?  What if your Mom knows that your BASICALLY on a kids site instead of exercising, have a job, or something?  I do exercising but no job(because I'm 13.  I'm not allowed to get a job yet) and I do Tae Kwon Do and all kinds of stuff.

 

You two are adorable. :D I just want to pat you on your heads and give you candy.

Isn't your mom calling you?

If you don't like people that use their head and stand up to bullies, then you may not like me because I deal with bullies head on!  

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Finally, let's tackle the 'issue' of my jealousy. I am 24, almost twice TMS and your age. Am I jealous of something a 13-year-old wrot e in ten minutes and that another 13-year-old messed his pants over? No. Frankly, I've got bigger concerns.

 

Bigger concerns?  Like making sure your mom doesn't find out your on a forum for a kids toy line?

 

"but because he is a 13-year-old kid on the internet without life experience or real writing skill"

 

know ToaMarkSurge has a "life experience" and "real writing skill".  But what about YOU :glare: ?  What if your Mom knows that your BASICALLY on a kids site instead of exercising, have a job, or something?  I do exercising but no job(because I'm 13.  I'm not allowed to get a job yet) and I do Tae Kwon Do and all kinds of stuff.

 

You two are adorable. :D I just want to pat you on your heads and give you candy.

Isn't your mom calling you?

 

*Pulls on chain leash*

No, bad MocMaker bad!

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Isn't your mom calling you?

Are you trying to make me laugh so hard that I suffocate? Because all you're doing is helping me picture a kid with school-short hair, at least one older, more popular sibling, and a need to sound more mature than his peers at all costs. Really, you should just stop before you really humiliate yourself.

 

TMS, leave him be. He's actually kind of entertaining.

 

Now, on topic, I'm considering what I'd do if I was given G2 from the beginning, rather than starting with what we have. I like the idea of elemental spirits as a contrast to the mechanical nature of the main characters... Cross Avatar:TLA with Terminator, perhaps? The robotic workers (villagers) escaped the grip of a tyrannical AI (Makuta), but their leaders struck a deal with the elemental spirits of the island, allowing them to fight back against the schemes of the MAIkuta? The six Toa would be champions of the tribes, though I'd probably replace one of Stone or Earth in favour of Lightning, who live in the mountainous region between Ice and Water where storms are a near-constant part of the climate. Have Pohatu replaced with Chiara, though the rest stay the same. Let me think about this.

:r: :e: :g: :i: :t: :n: :u: :i:

Elemental Rahi in Gen2, anyone? A write-up for an initial video for a G2 plot

 

I really wish everyone would stop trying to play join the dots with Gen 1 and Gen 2 though,it seems there's a couple new threads everyday and often they're duplicates of already existing conversations! Or simply parallel them with a slightly new 'twist'! Gen 2 is NEW, it is NOT Gen 1 and it is NOT a continuation. Outside of the characters we already have I personally don't want to see ANY old characters return. I think it will cheapen the whole experience to those of us familiar with the original line...

 

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Not sure about how I'd write it... but I wish that Lego would give fans a clearer look at Okoto. Like, through a video game or something. Wasn't there a 3D Mata Nui Explorer thing once upon a time? I want something like that, but for Okoto.

 

What happens next??? Who knows? But it will almost certainly involve death, edginess, and terrible writing.

 

Ah! The best way to make a quick buck!!

 

Isn't your mom calling you?


Are you trying to make me laugh so hard that I suffocate? Because all you're doing is helping me picture a kid with school-short hair, at least one older, more popular sibling, and a need to sound more mature than his peers at all costs. Really, you should just stop before you really humiliate yourself.

 

This thread is fun

 

I like it!

 

Keep going at each other, guys! Don't leave us hanging!!

Edited by TheSkeletonMan939

 

 

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Finally, let's tackle the 'issue' of my jealousy. I am 24, almost twice TMS and your age. Am I jealous of something a 13-year-old wrot e in ten minutes and that another 13-year-old messed his pants over? No. Frankly, I've got bigger concerns.

 

Bigger concerns?  Like making sure your mom doesn't find out your on a forum for a kids toy line?

 

"but because he is a 13-year-old kid on the internet without life experience or real writing skill"

 

know ToaMarkSurge has a "life experience" and "real writing skill".  But what about YOU :glare: ?  What if your Mom knows that your BASICALLY on a kids site instead of exercising, have a job, or something?  I do exercising but no job(because I'm 13.  I'm not allowed to get a job yet) and I do Tae Kwon Do and all kinds of stuff.

 

You two are adorable. :D I just want to pat you on your heads and give you candy.

Isn't your mom calling you?

 

*applauds*

 

Bionicle is for kids, Regit. You'd think a bunch of kids would know better about how to write Bionicle than any of us jaded and sour adults. 

 

but try and refrain from giant robots

No. 

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I wouldn't write it any better, that's for sure.

 

Everyone complains about the focus on Tahu, but here's the thing: There's absolutely no room to fit in all six Toa.

 

I assume when LEGO went to Dum!Dum! to commission these animations, they were only given the budget to create the equivalent of the 17 minutes of animation we got. Splitting that into 9 serialized episodes is no easy task. Instead of telling a disjointed, even more rushed story by attempting to split the focus on the six Toa (and six Protectors? No way that would work) they opted to focus on the most popular character and mediate the events through his experience. All 6 characters and their Protector counterparts go through very similar trials and tribulations, so repeating that would not only be redundant but also a waste of time, as the story team has set story beats per month.

 

All things considered they turned out all right. Sure, they could have reduced the amount of recap time and possibly negotiated at least 30 more seconds, but overall it is extremely hard to write something solid in that extremely limited amount of time.

 

I don't even know how the rest of the year is going to pan out. I'm going to wait until the books and graphic novels come out before I judge the actual writing.

 

-NotS

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woah, hey, i think both sides here might wanna cool off a bit. wait, I'm not a mod, i don't say that.

 

but really, I kinda agree w/ Regitnui's criticism there, even if the tone was less than constructive sometimes. and idk, would it be too late for the opposition to maybe take some of that to heart? uh, i can't exactly word it much better myself, now that's it's in the heated state here but.... y'know?

 

yes? no?

 

EDIT: I think i'm gonna submit to the original poster's intent and go w/ the writing exercise:

 

Year one (2015): Creation

The Toa are called to okoto to deal with the Lord of Skull spiders and the Skull Spider horde (basically what we're getting now, it's p fine, so i wouldn't change it much) Lewa probably gets infected, and Onua Probably saves him. Later they face the zombie warriors in the ancient city to awaken the mask maker and stop Skull Grinder and the gang from abusing the Mask of Creation's unlimited creative power.

 

Year two (2016): Control

After the awakening of Ekimu, mask making returns as villagers start getting unique masks of their own, the Toa now have new powered-up (nuva-esque) masks, and all seems to be well, but Ekimu is worried, Makuta is still missing and so too, is his dangerous and powerful Mask of Control. so the toa search Okoto to find him, passing through many landmarks (probs named and pinpointed on a map, but i don't feel like naming them off the top of my head, okie?) until they reach the Hoarder's Tomb, a maze-like ruin with many traps to guard the slumbering Makuta, the Toa enter the lair and prepare themselves for danger...

 

the winter story would leave off at makuta's empty sarcophagus, and the domed claws just off screen, maybe glowing eyes too, this is shown in the summer wave to belong to an elemental Destroyer, six hunched robots (sorta a rahkshi-bohrok thing, with elemental motifs and powers) sent out to pave Okoto for a new age utopia. The Toa cannot beat their elemental might, but instead must stall the superpowered beings while six brave villagers seek control towers throughout Okoto, the destruction of which will disable the Destroyers powers.

 

year three (2017): Ultimate Power

This time the small sets are villain sets, with a horde of nasty bugs called Kutrahk, Makuta's own personal underlings, each flowing with one of his six ultimate powers, it is clear he has returned, as the island cracks open to reveal their underground swarms, (they are silver or gunmetal, and have transparent bones corresponding with their element.) They lay seige to the villages of Okoto, spreading chaos and destruction that even Ekimu cannot turn, the only way to stop it is to find Makuta and destroy his Mask of Ultimate Power before Okoto is torn apart, and the elements seperated forever. (this time, for a sense of urgency, the toa don't appear until winter, so instead you get the Destroyers in their new Ultimate forms, Destroyer Ta, destroyer, Ga, Destroyer Ko, Destroyer Le, Destroyer Po, and Destroyer Nu.)

 

The Toa appear now in the summer, after falling in the first half of the year, they rise from the chasms of Okoto in their Elementally Overcharged forms, (Ultimate-Toa Name Here-) and join forces with the villagers from 2016 (on vehicle or steed sets maybe? idk if all six would fit) against Makuta, in the form of a massive titan of red-veined-obsidian, wearing the black-to-tr. red blend Mask of Ultimate Power.

 

feel free to critique this, it's probs a mess at least somewhere. :u

Edited by Rahkshi Lalonde
  • Upvote 5

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Bionicle is for kids, Regit. You'd think a bunch of kids would know better about how to write Bionicle than any of us jaded and sour adults. 

 Yea, like how the Bionicle Story Team is entirely composed of school-age kids. You can tell by the quality of the story and animations. :P

 

 

Mocmaker, Gipsy, Regit, knock it off with the (in MM and Gipsy's cases, poorly written) insults or I shall bringeth down the wrath of Mod upon thee.

I'll stop. Though... Is that what they were trying to do? I thought they were joking around.

 

 

woah, hey, i think both sides here might wanna cool off a bit. wait, I'm not a mod, i don't say that.

 

but really, I kinda agree w/ Regitnui's criticism there, even if the tone was less than constructive sometimes. and idk, would it be too late for the opposition to maybe take some of that to heart? uh, i can't exactly word it much better myself, now that's it's in the heated state here but.... y'know?

 

yes? no?

 

EDIT: I think i'm gonna submit to the original poster's intent and go w/ the writing exercise:

 

Year one (2015): Creation

The Toa are called to okoto to deal with the Lord of Skull spiders and the Skull Spider horde (basically what we're getting now, it's p fine, so i wouldn't change it much) Lewa probably gets infected, and Onua Probably saves him. Later they face the zombie warriors in the ancient city to awaken the mask maker and stop Skull Grinder and the gang from abusing the Mask of Creation's unlimited creative power.

 

Year two (2016): Control

After the awakening of Ekimu, mask making returns as villagers start getting unique masks of their own, the Toa now have new powered-up (nuva-esque) masks, and all seems to be well, but Ekimu is worried, Makuta is still missing and so too, is his dangerous and powerful Mask of Control. so the toa search Okoto to find him, passing through many landmarks (probs named and pinpointed on a map, but i don't feel like naming them off the top of my head, okie?) until they reach the Hoarder's Tomb, a maze-like ruin with many traps to guard the slumbering Makuta, the Toa enter the lair and prepare themselves for danger...

 

the winter story would leave off at makuta's empty sarcophagus, and the domed claws just off screen, maybe glowing eyes too, this is shown in the summer wave to belong to an elemental Destroyer, six hunched robots (sorta a rahkshi-bohrok thing, with elemental motifs and powers) sent out to pave Okoto for a new age utopia. The Toa cannot beat their elemental might, but instead must stall the superpowered beings while six brave villagers seek control towers throughout Okoto, the destruction of which will disable the Destroyers powers.

 

year three (2017): Ultimate Power

This time the small sets are villain sets, with a horde of nasty bugs called Kutrahk, Makuta's own personal underlings, each flowing with one of his six ultimate powers, it is clear he has returned, as the island cracks open to reveal their underground swarms, (they are silver or gunmetal, and have transparent bones corresponding with their element.) They lay seige to the villages of Okoto, spreading chaos and destruction that even Ekimu cannot turn, the only way to stop it is to find Makuta and destroy his Mask of Ultimate Power before Okoto is torn apart, and the elements seperated forever. (this time, for a sense of urgency, the toa don't appear until winter, so instead you get the Destroyers in their new Ultimate forms, Destroyer Ta, destroyer, Ga, Destroyer Ko, Destroyer Le, Destroyer Po, and Destroyer Nu.)

 

The Toa appear now in the summer, after falling in the first half of the year, they rise from the chasms of Okoto in their Elementally Overcharged forms, (Ultimate-Toa Name Here-) and join forces with the villagers from 2016 (on vehicle or steed sets maybe? idk if all six would fit) against Makuta, in the form of a massive titan of red-veined-obsidian, wearing the black-to-tr. red blend Mask of Ultimate Power.

 

feel free to critique this, it's probs a mess at least somewhere. :u

This isn't that bad, actually. It's simple, takes the parts of G1 that work and puts a new spin on them, and can be quickly absorbed by new fans. The third year is a great riff on the Bohrok and the Bohrok-Kal that doesn't feel like it's directly copy-pasting, The idea of the swarm coming back but as a even greater power makes sense as a natural escalation of the Skull Spiders. The 'lieutenant bugs' also echoes the Toa in Year 1, and I'd like to imagine there'd be similar combo models between the Kutrahk and their same-element Destroyer-Nui.

 

But, the second year seems a little lame. Building control towers to shut down the destroyers is a strange solution. I would have the villagers/Protectors back up the Toa rather than have a 'deus ex machina' like the towers. We don't have any evidence (So far) that building massive electronic towers is within the Okotoans capability, and they also cause a minor problem with the Destroyers' return six month later. Do the Kutrahk target and destroy the towers first? That's the most plausible option, though the villagers should have built the towers somewhere defensible...

 

Let's just give the whole thing a B overall, where TMS was a C+. Lest people claim I'm being unfair, both of mine are probably B+ at most in terms of concepting.

  • Upvote 2

:r: :e: :g: :i: :t: :n: :u: :i:

Elemental Rahi in Gen2, anyone? A write-up for an initial video for a G2 plot

 

I really wish everyone would stop trying to play join the dots with Gen 1 and Gen 2 though,it seems there's a couple new threads everyday and often they're duplicates of already existing conversations! Or simply parallel them with a slightly new 'twist'! Gen 2 is NEW, it is NOT Gen 1 and it is NOT a continuation. Outside of the characters we already have I personally don't want to see ANY old characters return. I think it will cheapen the whole experience to those of us familiar with the original line...

 

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-snip-

 

eh, that's a fair rating, since I hastily thought of, like 50% of that on the spot in the middle of the night. :b

 

(also, mild confusion it seems, the towers were to be made by makuta and disabled by the villagers, then presumably re-abled by the MoUP in year three as metallic Ultimate Power Control Towers, which i also just thought up on the spot, but is so fun to say!)

 

I definitely tried my hardest to keep the atmosphere the same as we've gotten on Okoto thus far, but also that it didn't feel boring or overly repetative, notable is that i left out a lot of details on what the Toa's new looks each year are, and, as said before, the names of locations. There would be presumably longer webisodes focusing on the travels between ruins and battles against enemies, no story would be left in obscure side-media! :U

bnnrimg1.pngbnnrimg2.pngbnnrimg3.pngbnnrimg4.pngbnnrimg5.pngbnnrimg8.png

 

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I would change one thing, give the toa qualities like the G1 such with Tahu as the fire element is part of him (not generated by the mask) and the mask is a mask with protective abilities.

Seriously if a Toa Okoto would lose one of their most important fighting abilities(element abilities) by losing their masks or getting it knocked off then they'd be weaker than most G1 Toa.

 

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I would change one thing, give the toa qualities like the G1 such with Tahu as the fire element is part of him (not generated by the mask) and the mask is a mask with protective abilities.

Seriously if a Toa Okoto would lose one of their most important fighting abilities(element abilities) by losing their masks or getting it knocked off then they'd be weaker than most G1 Toa.

I think it's the mask that gives them complete control or a greater well of energy to use. They're not completely helpless without the masks, just weaker, much like G1 Toa were dizzy and weakened without Kanohi.

  • Upvote 1

:r: :e: :g: :i: :t: :n: :u: :i:

Elemental Rahi in Gen2, anyone? A write-up for an initial video for a G2 plot

 

I really wish everyone would stop trying to play join the dots with Gen 1 and Gen 2 though,it seems there's a couple new threads everyday and often they're duplicates of already existing conversations! Or simply parallel them with a slightly new 'twist'! Gen 2 is NEW, it is NOT Gen 1 and it is NOT a continuation. Outside of the characters we already have I personally don't want to see ANY old characters return. I think it will cheapen the whole experience to those of us familiar with the original line...

 

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"Let's just give the whole thing a B overall, where TMS was a C+. Lest people claim I'm being unfair, both of mine are probably B+ at most in terms of concepting."

 

Is there any point in grading these. This isn't a school assignment, just ideas that will never become a reality.

 

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"Let's just give the whole thing a B overall, where TMS was a C+. Lest people claim I'm being unfair, both of mine are probably B+ at most in terms of concepting."

 

Is there any point in grading these. This isn't a school assignment, just ideas that will never become a reality.

 

 

i dunno, some people just like getting feedback, and some people find it easiest to give solid feedback when associating it with an easy-to-read grading system. :0

bnnrimg1.pngbnnrimg2.pngbnnrimg3.pngbnnrimg4.pngbnnrimg5.pngbnnrimg8.png

 

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Adding to my previous post:

 

  • Badguy to Goodguy ratio is 3:1, but Goodguy's win 51.46% of the time.
  • Marvel/DC crossovers in the comics.
  • Tripple the amount of elements, including some unique one. Such as Space/Time.
Edited by Marvel Nui

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"Let's just give the whole thing a B overall, where TMS was a C+. Lest people claim I'm being unfair, both of mine are probably B+ at most in terms of concepting."

 

Is there any point in grading these. This isn't a school assignment, just ideas that will never become a reality.

 

 

i dunno, some people just like getting feedback, and some people find it easiest to give solid feedback when associating it with an easy-to-read grading system. :0

 

 

I'm probably the closest thing this forum has to a qualified literary critic, and you're very unlikely to understand when i start using varsity-grade literary criticism, so I boil it down to Letter Grades. Don't worry, they won't have any effect on your life.

 

 

Adding to my previous post:

 

  • Badguy to Goodguy ratio is 3:1, but Goodguy's win 51.46% of the time.
  • Marvel/DC crossovers in the comics.
  • Triple the amount of elements, including some unique one. Such as Space/Time.

 

 

Now that your spelling mistake has been changed let's take those points one at a time.

  • Um, that's a rather mathematical percentage. DO you go around calculating how much the heroes of (say) the MCU win whenever they're confronted with their antagonists of enemies? In my opinion, you let the plot decide who wins and what they lose to do so, rather than a mathematical percentage. And a Bad/Good ratio? Really? Nobody I've spoken to does that when they write.
  • No. Horrible Idea. We'd have enough problems explaining who Vezon was if he showed up in G2, let alone some random schlub like Firefly or Mister Sinister. What do you think having Iron Man show up mid-animation would add to the story? Here's a simple answer; confusion.
  • Again, no. We can't have six elements without two of them overlapping (Stone and Earth, BTW), how much overlap are we going to have when one of the villains is wielding crystal and lava as elements? In short, fight locations would become critically important to the story, with the results of your chosen terrain causing one side to completely curb-stomp the other. Take our crystal-wielding bad guy. He could only attack in a salt-refinery or a jewel mine if he wanted to use his powers, whereas Onua could just earthquake all of his crystals into deep volcanic chasms. 

     

    Not to say terrain considerations aren't a bad thing to include in fantasy. I quite fondly remember a fight between a blue mage and a red mage ending when the red mage sank all the islands on a waterworld, thereby depriving the blue mage of mana. But in Bionicle, not a good idea. even if the vast majority are once-off OP 'fabric of the universe'-type elements. It just wouldn't work.

  • Upvote 1

:r: :e: :g: :i: :t: :n: :u: :i:

Elemental Rahi in Gen2, anyone? A write-up for an initial video for a G2 plot

 

I really wish everyone would stop trying to play join the dots with Gen 1 and Gen 2 though,it seems there's a couple new threads everyday and often they're duplicates of already existing conversations! Or simply parallel them with a slightly new 'twist'! Gen 2 is NEW, it is NOT Gen 1 and it is NOT a continuation. Outside of the characters we already have I personally don't want to see ANY old characters return. I think it will cheapen the whole experience to those of us familiar with the original line...

 

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  • Badguy to Goodguy ratio is 3:1, but Goodguy's win 51.46% of the time.
Well, this will necessitate there being a multiple of 5000 altercations. Should be quite the epic endurance match, for characters and fans alike!

 

~B~

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I would change one thing, give the toa qualities like the G1 such with Tahu as the fire element is part of him (not generated by the mask) and the mask is a mask with protective abilities.

Seriously if a Toa Okoto would lose one of their most important fighting abilities(element abilities) by losing their masks or getting it knocked off then they'd be weaker than most G1 Toa.

I think it's the mask that gives them complete control or a greater well of energy to use. They're not completely helpless without the masks, just weaker, much like G1 Toa were dizzy and weakened without Kanohi.

 

I just think it will be a big letdown if bionicle wont have classic mask powers though, that's a huge reason i liked bionicle in the first place.

I did understand the weakening concept in G1 but with 2015, but having masks that are based on and look a lot like a Hau and a Akaku it'd be really annoying that they ditched classic mystical mask powers the masks were known for and only used as some "elemental focusing batteries".

 

Edited by ---Kopaka Nuva---
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I would make it similar to Gen1 but not the same.

And there you've glanced off, if not directly hit the nail on the head. This is the reason why we don't have matoran, turaga, kanohi powers and 10 years worth of backstory. G2 is "similar, but not the same".

:r: :e: :g: :i: :t: :n: :u: :i:

Elemental Rahi in Gen2, anyone? A write-up for an initial video for a G2 plot

 

I really wish everyone would stop trying to play join the dots with Gen 1 and Gen 2 though,it seems there's a couple new threads everyday and often they're duplicates of already existing conversations! Or simply parallel them with a slightly new 'twist'! Gen 2 is NEW, it is NOT Gen 1 and it is NOT a continuation. Outside of the characters we already have I personally don't want to see ANY old characters return. I think it will cheapen the whole experience to those of us familiar with the original line...

 

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I would write it through a series of CGI-animated movies and tv shows with polybagged sets similar to good guy and bad guy to support it.

 

That is all, I am done.

I cannot tell if you're being serious or not... I'm erring on the side of joking.

:r: :e: :g: :i: :t: :n: :u: :i:

Elemental Rahi in Gen2, anyone? A write-up for an initial video for a G2 plot

 

I really wish everyone would stop trying to play join the dots with Gen 1 and Gen 2 though,it seems there's a couple new threads everyday and often they're duplicates of already existing conversations! Or simply parallel them with a slightly new 'twist'! Gen 2 is NEW, it is NOT Gen 1 and it is NOT a continuation. Outside of the characters we already have I personally don't want to see ANY old characters return. I think it will cheapen the whole experience to those of us familiar with the original line...

 

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I'd write it with style! B-)

 

I would probably handle the story the same way the current team is doing it, but I would try to focus a bit more on the Skull Spiders. I know there's no room for this in the animations, but in the books I'd have Lewa be taken-over by a Skull Spider on his quest for his gold mask and fight the Protector of Jungle. Later, during the fight with LOSS, I'd have the Toa lured into a maze where LOSS begins picking them off one by one. Something slightly more threatening than how he is currently portrayed.

  • Upvote 1

-O Knavery

Most vile, O trick of the Empire's basest wit.

A snare, a ruse, a ploy: and we the fools.

What great deception hath been plied today--

O rebels, do you hear? Fie, 'tis a trap! -Admiral Ackbar

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