Onuki Posted August 26, 2015 Share Posted August 26, 2015 Rau Convention HeldMembers Discover Striking Similarity Lakeside Ga-Koro is still recovering from hosting its first official and third unofficial Rau Convention earlier this weekend. The prestigious event began late Friday night and reportedly only concluded after an ambitious all-nighter at sunrise on Sunday. Turaga Nokama, competent Turaga and mediocre President of the Alpha Gamma Rau Society, was seen hastily dropping the keys to the Koro in the hands of a bewildered Macku late Friday afternoon, distractedly muttering, “You’re on your own.” Reports streamed in all weekend testifying to the wide range of esoteric activities that took place behind doorways that had no doors to close. After a brief opening ceremony, Nokama allegedly called the gathering to order, enthusiastically shoving a disturbingly detailed sign-in roster under each member’s nose in turn. Following this, a mystical Reading of the Ancient Runes was held, with all members present engaging their masks in a pleasant if somewhat useless exercise of rune translation. “We only get together once a year,” explained prominent Rau Society member and occasional home appliance spokesperson Kotu. “If it weren’t for these meetings, none of Mata Nui’s crucial prophecy translation would ever get done,” she commented, citing a chief reason of Nokama’s laziness. At this accusation, Turaga Nokama was reported to gesture wildly and hurriedly explain that not even a timely prophecy reading could have predicted the recent sinking of Hahli’s vacation yacht. Saturday’s proceedings were reputedly filled with the Alpha Gamma Rau Convention’s traditional mindless festivities, among them idle mask-painting and “using Rau as surfboards.” It was not until the Great Sleepless Sleepover of Saturday night that members Nokama and Kotu allegedly discovered that they do, in fact, wear the same mask. As the society’s only current members, the two were delighted to realize the uncanny resemblance they bear to each other, leading some to speculate on the identity of a common ancestor. Sources reveal that the convention still came to a close Sunday morning with the traditional practice of swimming around the convention hut several thousand times, but not before Turaga Nokama and Kotu reportedly bonded to a new level in their professional relationship. Kotu thoughtfully concluded her account of the weekend: “You can spend so much time working and fighting with someone and never realize the things you have in common.” With the majority of the town’s chief officials thus occupied, Deputy Matoran Macku reportedly only just prevented the berserk villagers from sinking Ga-Koro before Monday. 8 Quote The Latest and Fakest in Bionicle News Wanted: Chronicler | Wedding Announced | Bohrok-Kal Miffed | Staring Contest Continues Hakuna Vakama | Rau Convention Held | Globe Circumnavigated | Carver Offers Advice | Parade Possible Onepu Characterized | Koli Ball Shortage | Le-Koro Discovered | Toa Don Disguises | Top Toa Tied | Ko-Koro Welcomes Tahnok Hakuna Vakama Animation | Macku Goes Missing | In the Ice | The 1000 Word 2001 Poem | Kopaka the Toa | Honest Bionicle Trailers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boxorak the Azure Noob Posted September 6, 2015 Share Posted September 6, 2015 (edited) It was not until the Great Sleepless Sleepover of Saturday night that members Nokama and Kotu allegedly discovered that they do, in fact, wear the same mask. As the society’s only current members, the two were delighted to realize the uncanny resemblance they bear to each other, leading some to speculate on the identity of a common ancestor. Sources reveal that the convention still came to a close Sunday morning with the traditional practice of swimming around the convention hut several thousand times, but not before Turaga Nokama and Kotu reportedly bonded to a new level in their professional relationship. Okay, that paragraph is probably the funniest in this entire thing. Also, have you considered putting all of these News Story-type comedies into one thread? Edited September 6, 2015 by Boxorak the Azure Noob 4 Quote Statements (Mouseover to view): <1> <2> <3> <4> <5> <6> <7><8> <9> My MOCs:Characters- Makuta Dys Makuta Kamazotz Lord Vladek The Helmsmith Protector OCs Skull Whaler Skull Warden Creatures- Verdelisk Lord of Skull Spiders BBC Contest #69: Kahu Oko Taku Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onuki Posted September 6, 2015 Author Share Posted September 6, 2015 Thanks, glad you enjoyed it! Also, have you considered putting all of these News Story-type comedies into one thread? I have; there are definitely reasons to do it either way. I'm opting to post them separately because they are technically all standalone works and don't require the reader to have read any previous installments. I used to write both long and short comedies and I know that people don't always want to sit through the long stuff. This way, people can click on titles that interest them without having to sift through an entire topic, which can be daunting. I also hesitate to post them all in one thread because I want to leave open the possibility of writing new situations or personalities that contradict what I've already written, although I admit that for the most part the personalities and overall perspectives have so far been the same. In the old days, the Comedies forum was so active that everything was bumped down the page quickly, multi-post or not, so I guess my way of doing it is also a holdover from those days. I think if I were writing them any faster now, I would seriously think about merging them into one topic. All that said, I will probably have to remake my library topic soon. 2 Quote The Latest and Fakest in Bionicle News Wanted: Chronicler | Wedding Announced | Bohrok-Kal Miffed | Staring Contest Continues Hakuna Vakama | Rau Convention Held | Globe Circumnavigated | Carver Offers Advice | Parade Possible Onepu Characterized | Koli Ball Shortage | Le-Koro Discovered | Toa Don Disguises | Top Toa Tied | Ko-Koro Welcomes Tahnok Hakuna Vakama Animation | Macku Goes Missing | In the Ice | The 1000 Word 2001 Poem | Kopaka the Toa | Honest Bionicle Trailers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonkle Posted September 6, 2015 Share Posted September 6, 2015 This is literally the best thing ever. 2 Quote I been away a long time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toru Nui Posted September 19, 2015 Share Posted September 19, 2015 (edited) Meanwhile, Ahkmou is protesting outside, claiming the convention is being [intolerant] by not allowing Makuta worshipers to join them. Edited September 21, 2015 by -Windrider- 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonkle Posted September 19, 2015 Share Posted September 19, 2015 (edited) Meanwhile, Ahkmou is protesting outside, claiming the convention is being [intolerant] by not allowing Makuta worshipers to join them.It would be like Ahkmou to argue for racism and not religious discrimination. Edited September 21, 2015 by -Windrider- 1 Quote I been away a long time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toru Nui Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 It would be like Ahkmou to argue for racism and not religious discrimination.Yes, he's kind of an idiot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naota Takizawa Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 How many characters have a Rau anyway? I think we need Tamaru at the convention. 1 Quote If you like Pingu & want to support a good project, click here. Also, I've rejoined the BZPRPG & I have a new profile for a new game. Click here to see it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petewa Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 It would be like Ahkmou to argue for racism and not religious discrimination.Yes, he's kind of an idiot.How many characters have a Rau anyway? I think we need Tamaru at the convention. They're being racist for not allowing anyone who's not blue into the convention, just think of the white, black, brown, red, and green children out there with Raus who could've come to this thing if not for the racism of a few Ga-Matoran. 1 Quote Mataru Nui, an Interactive Adventure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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