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Delva-Nui: Shadowed Review Topic


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4 replies to this topic

#1 Offline The Root

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Posted Nov 28 2011 - 11:11 PM

Okay, here it is! Tell me what you think of my epic here! Tell me what you like and dislike of it. I'm listening!

Edited by Sybre, Nov 28 2011 - 11:12 PM.

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#2 Offline Chroma Champion JiMing

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Posted Dec 24 2011 - 10:15 PM

So wait, were you the legendary hero who founded Delva-Nui?And I think your epic is good, but perhaps you could work on better formatting. Just a suggestion.
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#3 Offline The Root

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Posted Dec 24 2011 - 11:04 PM

So wait, were you the legendary hero who founded Delva-Nui?And I think your epic is good, but perhaps you could work on better formatting. Just a suggestion.

Eh, mostly. But I made up Delva-Nui long before I came up with Sybre. I even drew a map or two of it. I even remember what it looks like! And formatting?

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#4 Offline Chroma Champion JiMing

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Posted Dec 24 2011 - 11:15 PM

What I meant is that maybe instead of just one large paragraph, you could split up the chapter into different paragraphs to match the tone of each scene.
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#5 Offline The Root

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Posted Jan 01 2012 - 04:49 PM

What I meant is that maybe instead of just one large paragraph, you could split up the chapter into different paragraphs to match the tone of each scene.

Oh. I get it.

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