BIONICLE The Abridged Series

[The UltimoScorp]

Now, before anyone gets all up in a huff, I know there's another topic called BIONICLE 2001 Abridged. This is my own thing, and is taken in a completely different direction, staying true to the characters, while maybe exaggerating their quirks, as well as following the story as we know it. With a few..... changes here and there for comedic effect.

 

So, here goes.

 

 

In the time before time, the Great Spirit descended from..... oh forget it, you know this bit already, Great Spirit, Matoran, Betrayed by his brother, Three Virtues, blah, blah blah. Let's just get to the story.

 

On the serene beach of Ta-Wahi, a silver canister washed ashore, pushed onto the lonely sands by the waves surrounding the island of Mata Nui. There was a hissing sound as air pressure equalised, and the top of the canister fell off, revealing roughly half of a biomechanical being and a myriad of what appeared to be it's remaining parts. The crimson being yawned, blearily blinking sleep from their eyes as they looked around. It was quite calm until they realised their state of unassembly. Quite reasonably, the red being began to panic. "Whaagh!" Scrabbling up into a sitting position on their one arm, they prompty smacked their head on the top of the canister, stifling a swear, as they scooted out of the silver pod. Still taking in shaky breaths, the being looked around. All the parts were still there.

 

Good. Okay. Maybe I can just.... reattach them....?  

 

That sounded somehow reasonable, and so they grabbed a hold of what they sincerely hoped was a leg, and with a painful sounding snapping noise, Popped it into place at their hip. And a scream of pain.

 

A short while later....

 

A triumphant red being now stood on the beach, everything reattached. It had only taken the better part of an hour. Still, it had worked somehow! They were whole again! But.... now other questions surfaced. Who were they? And where were they? And why were they....wherever here was? They had a sword, so maybe they were..... a warrior? That seemed to make sense. Yes, a warrior! Maybe even a soldier, here to conquer! Indeed, that made sense. After all, why else would they be in a strange land and armed? The being shrugged, and inspected the Canister once more, and discovered two things. One was a word, engraved on the outside. Tahu.

 

"Ta-hu. Huh. Cool. Is that my name? Or the name of this thing?"

 

The being decided he'd call himself that for now, at least until he could learn his real name. And besides, it sounded strong and noble. The other thing Tahu found was a mask. Red, helmet-like and imposing, Tahu found himself instantly drawn to it. It seemed to scowl up at him, with stern eyeholes. The perfect face of a warrior. Gleefully, He put on the mask, and felt an incredible surge of strength and power flow through him, like fire spreading through his very essence. To Tahu's surprise, that was indeed what it was, as flames erupted from his sword, charring a nearby rock. Wide eyed, he gazed at the now warm sword in awe. "I can shoot fire?! Nice!" There was now no doubt in Tahu's mind that he was here to fight. Though.... he still wasn't sure what. Letting his sword arm fall to his side, He looked around the empty beach. There was nothing. No one. Anger bubbled up inside of Tahu, and he scowled. "What am I supposed to DO?!" He shouted into the air. No one answered. He searched the area once more, and spotted a thin column of smoke coming from the distance to his left. 

 

"That seems like as good a place to find some answers as any..." he muttered. "After all, where there's smoke, there's.... fire....." He looked at his sword. No smoke. Just fire. That was confusing. Tahu shook his head and started for the source of the smoke. He'd gotten a fair distance when he could have sworn he heard a yell, and someone landing hard on the beach, but when he looked back, he saw nothing. With a shrug, Tahu continued toward source of the smoke, which he now saw was a charred forest.

[The UltimoScorp]

 In the Charred Forest of Ta-Wahi, Four Matoran were gathered behind a fallen log, quietly waiting for a Rahi to stumble into the clearing just beyond. Jala, Captain of the Guard of Ta-Koro watched intently, as something moved through the broken trees. He could not see it yet, but the telltale cracking of dead branches echoed through the dead forest. The contrast between these sounds and the otherwise silence of the forest was incredibly tense. Jala was so on edge that he nearly jumped out of his mask when One of the other Guardsmen....discharged behind him, leaving a small bit of dead grass aflame.

 

His fellows were quick to shush him, Jala in particular giving the gassy Matoran a stern look. "Kapura, keep it down," He said turning back to the clearing. Kapura simply grinned sheepishly through his Pakari as Jala turned.

 

The Captain of the Guard was even more surprised at what he saw. A tall figure, With burning eyes stalked into the clearing, saying something incomprehensible. In one hand was a flame shaped sword. It was like nothing the Matoran group had ever seen. Jala just hoped the trap Kapura had rigged would hold it.

 

As it stepped into the clearing, Fresh wooden poles, contrasting the blackened husks around them, erupted from the ground, surrounding the tall being.

 

Jala Grinned, crying out, "Got it!" As he hopped up on the log, spear in hand. The others followed suit.

 

The being in the cage looked at the wooden bars, then laughed. His eyes blazed and so too did his sword, lighting aflame as he cut a swathe through the wooden trap, leaving only ashes in the sword's wake. The tall being laughed again, saying something about using wood to stop fire.

 

Jala was taken aback. One of the other Guardsmen leaned over, "Uh..... it just burned through the trap, Captain."

 

"Yeah, I can see that," Jala snapped. 

 

"What do we do now?" Asked Kapura.

 

"We.... we attaaack!" Jala shouted, hopping down and brandishing his spear as he started running at the flame powered being.

 

The other three Guards looked at each other, before shrugging and following Jala's lead, Kapura bringing up the rear as usual. As they neared the being, it looked surprised, but readied it's sword, clearly not willing to go down without a fight. Before anyone could swing a weapon, however, a voice rang out through the woods.

 

"Enough! Stand down, Captain!"

 

Tahu(because it was of course he), Jala, and the other Guards looked to see a stooped man with a Noble Huna walk out, supporting himself with a staff topped with a small flaming ball. 

 

Jala looked surprised, "Turaga Vakama? What are you doing out here?"

 

"I had a vision in the flame of the Toa arriving. Also I just happened to be out on a walk."

 

Jala raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. Who could fathom the mind of the elder?

 

It was one of the less tactful Guards that spoke up, "You go on walks? I've never seen you leave the village!"

 

Vakama huffed indignantly, "I too have my way of passing the time."

 

"Who are all of you?" Tahu interjected. "And what is a toe-ah?"

 

The Matoran looked shocked. How could this.... person not know about the Toa?"

 

Vakama sighed, "It is as I feared. Come, my friend, I will explain it to you on the way back to Ta-Koro."

 

"...Okay. Uh.... sorry about your.... wooden cage thing...."

 

Kapura simply grumbled as the group began to walk back through the forest.

[Onuki]

This is great! I like how you're parodying the original story without diverging from it!

 

These have been my favorite parts of each chapter:

 

There was a hissing sound as air pressure equalised, and the top of the canister fell off, revealing roughly half of a biomechanical being and a myriad of what appeared to be its remaining parts. The crimson being yawned, blearily blinking sleep from their eyes as they looked around. It was quite calm until they realised their state of unassembly. Quite reasonably, the red being began to panic. "Whaagh!" Scrabbling up into a sitting position on their one arm, they prompty smacked their head on the top of the canister, stifling a swear, as they scooted out of the silver pod. Still taking in shaky breaths, the being looked around. All the parts were still there.

 

Good. Okay. Maybe I can just.... reattach them....?  

 

That sounded somehow reasonable, and so they grabbed a hold of what they sincerely hoped was a leg, and with a painful sounding snapping noise, popped it into place at their hip. And a scream of pain.

 

A short while later....

 

A triumphant red being now stood on the beach, everything reattached. It had only taken the better part of an hour. Still, it had worked somehow! They were whole again! But.... now other questions surfaced.

 

...

 

"That seems like as good a place to find some answers as any..." he muttered. "After all, where there's smoke, there's.... fire....." He looked at his sword. No smoke. Just fire. That was confusing. Tahu shook his head and started for the source of the smoke. He'd gotten a fair distance when he could have sworn he heard a yell, and someone landing hard on the beach, but when he looked back, he saw nothing. With a shrug, Tahu continued toward source of the smoke, which he now saw was a charred forest.

 

Jaller was taken aback. One of the other Guardsmen leaned over, "Uh..... it just burned through the trap, Captain."

 

"Yeah, I can see that," Jaller snapped. 

 

"What do we do now?" asked Kapura.

 

"We.... we attaaack!" Jaller shouted, hopping down and brandishing his spear as he started running at the flame powered being.

 

The other three Guards looked at each other, before shrugging and following Jaller's lead, Kapura bringing up the rear as usual. As they neared the being, it looked surprised, but readied its sword, clearly not willing to go down without a fight. Before anyone could swing a weapon, however, a voice rang out through the woods.

 

"Enough! Stand down, Captain!"

 

Tahu (because it was of course he), Jaller, and the other Guards looked to see a stooped man with a Noble Huna walk out, supporting himself with a staff topped with a small flaming ball. 

 

Jaller looked surprised, "Turaga Vakama? What are you doing out here?"

 

"I had a vision in the flame of the Toa arriving. Also I just happened to be out on a walk."

 

Jaller raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. Who could fathom the mind of the elder?

 

It was one of the less tactful Guards that spoke up, "You go on walks? I've never seen you leave the village!"

 

Vakama huffed indignantly, "I too have my way of passing the time."

 

Your humorous versions of Tahu's assembling himself and of Tahu's meeting with Vakama and Jaller are great! I think we all thought it was weird that Vakama just happened to be next to the Rahi trap when they found Tahu.

 

Nice work. I'm looking forward to the next chapter!

[The UltimoScorp]

This is great!   I like how you're parodying the original story without diverging from it!

 

I'm glad you're enjoying it!  This is mostly a side project, so expect going to be slow, but without further ado, I present the next section!

 

 

​On the glacial peaks of Mount Ihu, a white and grey Toa moved easily through the snow covered slopes. A Great Akaku Sat on his face, and in one hand he carried a sharp blade, white as the snow. In his other hand was a small shield. His Name was Kopaka, Toa of Ice, and he was searching for Kanohi masks. Having found his own village with much less hassle than a certain Toa of Fire, he'd learned his purpose, to find all of the Great and Noble Masks, and defeat some faceless evil called Makuta, to awaken the Great Spirit, Mata Nui.

 

Frankly, much of it went over Kopaka's head, but at the very least it gave him something to do. To be perfectly honest, Kopaka didn't care. Turaga Nuju spoke only a strange bird language, which once translated by Matoro was no more helpful and vague. 

 

"Some great Destiny I have," He remarked bitterly to the wind.

 

His musing was interrupted by a yell, a rumbling and then an immense crashing noise as several tons of rock and earth rained down upon him.

 

"Geronimoooo!!!!"

 

Kopaka looked up in time to be buried by several large boulders. which was disconcerting in its own right, but moreso was the brown and tan being that stood atop said boulders, rubbing the back of his head and grinning sheepishly.

 

"Sorry about that!" He said in a most honest and apologetic tone. Kopaka could not help but to consider forgiving the stranger.

 

"Please get off my chest." He spoke evenly.

 

"Huh? Oh! Right, sorry," Spoke the bronze one, hopping down. "My name's Pohatu, here lemme help you-"

 

"I'm fine I can get it myself."

 

Pohatu cocked an eyebrow and simply tapped his foot against the ground, causing the boulders to raise off of the Toa of Ice.

 

"You were saying?" he said with a grin.

 

Kopaka frowned, then got up and stepped aside of the boulders, which Pohatu let fall with a ground shaking thud.

 

"Thanks, I suppose."

 

"See, was that so hard?"

 

Kopaka could feel the traces of a smile touch his lips. This brown stranger- Pohatu, had he said?- certainly had a way with words.

 

"Definitely easier than what I had in mind. You're a Toa, then?"

 

"That's correct! Pohatu, Toa of Stone and athletic good looks at your service!" He gave an exaggerated bow.

 

Karz, there was that smile again. 

 

"Kopaka. Ice," He offered in return.

 

"Not much for conversation, huh?" Pohatu asked with a grin and a wink.

 

"Not so much, no." Still, he had to admit, it was less boring searching for masks with someone to keep him company. And a handsome someone to boot.

 

He frowned. Handsome? Where had that come from? No matter, he had more important things to worry about. 

 

"Come my large thighed friend, I'm hunting for masks and could do with the company."

 

The two continued up the mountain together.....

 

 

 

 

 

********************************************

 

And edited with the rest! Next up we'll cover Gali!

Edited October 20, 2015 by The Other Other Alex

[Onuki]

That was a pretty funny version of Kopaka and Pohatu's first meeting! I like how you portrayed Kopaka as vastly more competent than Tahu. The Tahu-Kopaka rivalry should be funny to work with!

[confused piraka]

the first installment of this was great 'loses mask' 'socket cracks'