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thanks so much for all your feedback, staffies :D

here's Sky's updated profile:

 

Name: Skylor “Sky” Sparrowhawk

 

Character Type: Hero

 

Abilities/Equipment: Sky possesses a pair of kinetic propulsion units on her back which allow her to fly and swoop like a bird, including jumping into flight from a standing start. With this power she can soar and glide above the rooftops, although it is not without its limitations. This form of propulsion works using a series of jets - this means that Sky doesn't need to be over a nearby surface to fly, but it is very difficult to hover as to do so means constantly adjusting and changing the direction of these jets to stay relatively stationary. Flying takes about the same amount of effort as running, and going too high deprives her robot body of the oxygen needed for basic functions and cooling mechanisms. She also has a kinetic blaster powerful enough to knock medium sized enemies away, although if she fires it while in the air it requires some close attention to counteract the gun’s recoil. The gun also requires reloading with fresh chemical power cells after twenty seconds of firing, whether fired continuously or in bursts - she carries these power cells at any time that she carries the blaster. The blaster is relatively rapid fire, although there is a delay of between one and two seconds between each shot. In addition to this custom-made weapon, Sky also carries a generic taser - with a range of about a meter and enough spark to put a civilian on the ground. Sky’s build is slight, agile and quick, but only lightly armoured.  Her mind is wired to cope well in, and even enjoy, high adrenaline situations, making her reflex time uncommonly good. She is trained in marksmanship.

 

Appearance: Sky is average height for a hero, but of below average bulk and armour. What armour she has, as well as her frame, appears in varying shades of sky blue, accompanied by small sections of light silver, gunmetal and even white. On her back, the outstretched structures which her kinetic propulsion units are mounted on are shaped like the wings of a bird. They are rigid, but can angle and turn on ball joints, while the jets mounted on them can swivel themselves - all of this can be adjusted by Sky with a thought. The wings are coloured blue and white, with the colours of the ‘feathers’ alternating. All of her form is constructed in a streamlined way so that every component fits together gracefully. Her hero core and eyes are somewhere between gold and silver in colour, and glow. Sections of her body have been tattooed (although ‘graffitied’ might describe it better) with gold, silver and cyan writing and symbols - a touch she has added herself. Sky’s helmet is as streamlined as the rest of her, and includes a large transparent visor that can appear over her eyes - information about Sky’s environment can also be projected onto the inside of this visor. Like most hero helmets, Sky’s has a built-in communicator and can fold back into a more open mode when not in use.

 

Bio: Sky is a relatively new Hero, having served the Hero Factory for a little under six months. With large sections of the Hero Factory having been destroyed in that time, she missed a notable amount of the training which a hero would usually receive, and so is relatively inexperienced. To give her at least some exposure to the outside world, she was sent on a variety of relatively low risk operations around the city alongside more accomplished teams. From the start, she was a wild card, searching for excitement and intrigue in even the most mundane of tasks. Throughout her so far short life serving the Hero Factory, she has proved somewhat useful, but also unruly and unserious. Her rebellious nature (and she would laugh to hear it called anything so severe) has gone so far as to disobey (or ‘reinterpret’) direct orders on more than one occasion. At the moment, she still seeks adventure within Makuhero City.

 

 

things that have been changed include:

-clarification on how flight works

-clarification and balancing for the blaster

-reduction of number of weapons

-tweaking of backstory to make more sense 

Edited by The Silent King

.


Kathok

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Name: Jax Beemer

Character Type: Hero

Abilities/Equipment: Two small wings and a stinger, much like a bee’s, delivering a fierce poison to those it makes contact with. These all fold into a backpack-esque shape when undercover. A light fighter, used to quick punching. The wings are able to move Jax quickly around a skirmish or battle, but not long distances.

Appearance: CURRENT MOC: [http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?i=6404947(please note that this was built when I was 10 years old) Ignore the Thornax launcher. Will be rebuilt soon.

Bio: Jax “The Bumblebee” Beemer is a loose-wire veteran fighter who is on extended order to roam the star systems near the Makuhero Rim. He takes care of local problems so that the rest of the Factory can focus on threats outside the local periphery. Once created, he immediately tore out of the Factory and went vigilante. Once the Factory finally got their hands on him (after about 6 months of Beemer's illegal hero work), the Factory decided that it would be best to let Beemer go alone most of the time.

 
Beemer and the related profiles look mostly fine, but "fierce poison" is a little vague. I just want to clarify - what effects does the poison have, does it only work on organics, or does it have some component that effects robots as well? 

 

Salty emo biscuit Rune approved 2/3.

 

Sometimes, I really don't like you people...  <_<

Embers - a new Bionicle Epic - Coming 2024 

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With Echo, the moral thing... Uh, well, I thought that was all part of a big twist. See, the conspiracy that Focus heard about wasn't to remove some random excess moral set from Heroes- it was to remove ALL morals, from what I understand. This was misinterpreted as some extra set of morals instead of the morals themselves, and then Focus would have been guilty and horrified to see his friend twisted into a moral-less being.

 

Heroes don't have an extra, oppressive set of morals- their morals seem to be on the same line as their personalities. You have Heroes that turn against or even attempt to murder other Heroes of their own accord. You also have Heroes with differing opinions on what is wrong or right- for example, Breez's dedication to not hurting innocent animals. If someone removed Echo's Hero morals, he'd end up with no morals at all.

 

Beemer: While I love this bizarre bee man so much (I'm hoping the stinger is exactly where it should be on a bee) I'm gonna have to say pending approval too. If this guy went out and broke the law for six months, it's more likely he would be(e) arrested rather than regarded with a shrug and a "keep out of trouble, sport". Maybe make it an overzealous wild goose chase or something?

 

The ship and reporter are approved and I hope we get Beemer approved ASAP so I can finally have a character here I can make Bee Movie references about.

 

EDIT: Also what Nato said about poison.

Edited by ZippyWharrgarbl

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


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See, the conspiracy that Focus heard about wasn't to remove some random excess moral set from Heroes- it was to remove ALL morals, from what I understand. 

 

As the engineer of said conspiracy, I'd just like to clarify - their intent was to free heroes from moral restraint.

 

They'd still be able to recognise the difference between right and wrong, but those morals would no longer hold them back from being more pragmatic, doing what was necessary rather than what was right. 

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See, the conspiracy that Focus heard about wasn't to remove some random excess moral set from Heroes- it was to remove ALL morals, from what I understand. 

 

As the engineer of said conspiracy, I'd just like to clarify - their intent was to free heroes from moral restraint.

 

They'd still be able to recognise the difference between right and wrong, but those morals would no longer hold them back from being more pragmatic, doing what was necessary rather than what was right. 

 

 

Exactly. You worded that so much better than I did in the profile.  :P

"It doesn't matter how big your first bite is. It matters how many bites you take." -Mool the Wanderer

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Huh. Still, that doesn't sound like it would leave one with a stronger sense of morality- in fact that sounds like something that would turn Heroes into Villains, essentially; they know something's right and other things are wrong, but they don't hesitate to do the wrong thing to get what they want.

 

In Echo's case, Hero morals differ like everyone's morals differ. If you took those away, you would have a very noticeable effect on the individual's morality, same as if you took away any civilian's morals.

 

EDIT: Rylinth posted before I finished this. If Echo's meant to be "still knows if something's wrong but simply doesn't care", that makes much, much more sense than "we removed his morals and now he has a strong sense of right and wrong", and I'll put that down as a misunderstanding/miswording deal. If that's what you meant- that he has that sense, but no longer cares about breaking them, then fair enough and approved.

Edited by ZippyWharrgarbl

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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Okay, let me try to explain this with an example. 

 

Let's say someone's managed to capture a villain who'd killed loads of innocent people and was notoriously good at escaping prisons. A regular hero would do their job, follow the hero code, and escort said villain to prison... even though they'd inevitably escape to kill again. 

 

A hero freed from moral restraint, as the conspiracy envisioned, would probably just shoot that villain in the head and get on with their day, because that would guarantee that the villain in question wouldn't be able to kill or escape again. 

 

Basically, the conspiracy thought that heroes were too soft, and needed to take a harsher stance. 

Edited by The Old Master

Embers - a new Bionicle Epic - Coming 2024 

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BZPRPG Characters - Minnorak, Kain, T'harrak, Savis, Vazaria, Lash

BZPRPG Mercenary Group - The Outsiders - Description - History - Base

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Okay, let me try to explain this with an example. 

 

Let's say someone's managed to capture a villain who'd killed loads of innocent people and was notoriously good at escaping prisons. A regular hero would do their job, follow the hero code, and escort said villain to prison... even though they'd inevitably escape to kill again. 

 

A hero freed from moral restraint, as the conspiracy envisioned, would probably just shoot that villain in the head and get on with their day, because that would guarantee that the villain in question wouldn't be able to kill or escape again. 

 

Basically, the conspiracy thought that heroes were too soft, and needed to take a harsher stance. 

 

This is also where Focus differed from other heroes, as he tended towards a more pragmatic approach anyways, and this caused tension with some of the Factory's higher-ups.

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Okay, let me try to explain this with an example. 

 

Let's say someone's managed to capture a villain who'd killed loads of innocent people and was notoriously good at escaping prisons. A regular hero would do their job, follow the hero code, and escort said villain to prison... even though they'd inevitably escape to kill again. 

 

A hero freed from moral restraint, as the conspiracy envisioned, would probably just shoot that villain in the head and get on with their day, because that would guarantee that the villain in question wouldn't be able to kill or escape again. 

 

Basically, the conspiracy thought that heroes were too soft, and needed to take a harsher stance. 

 

Yes, this a perfect example of what I meant.

Oh yeah, and before I forget again,

Crowley, Mr. Vyle, and Saracen Rune all Approved 3/3

(Please tell me I'm not the only one here who actually likes Rune?...)

"It doesn't matter how big your first bite is. It matters how many bites you take." -Mool the Wanderer

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We love Rune. He's just a mopey child.

 

That... sounds like it just loosens their morals a bit. I get what Nato's saying, and also that can very quickly go to villain territory so it sounds like a cool concept, but in Echo's case, he was claiming to have the Hero Factory morals erased, and yet still have a strong sense of right and wrong.

 

Rylinth has since clarified that this is not the case and that something else entirely has been done to Echo. If he clarifies that Echo lost moral inhibitions rather than morals- saying they are Hero inhibitions wouldn't be accurate, as most people in general would have those inhibitions- then that's fine. It even sounds like a cool concept to explore, either in Focus' reaction or Echo himself, if he remembers his past.

  • Upvote 1

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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We love Rune. He's just a mopey child.

 

He's a 40 year old, loyal servant of Hero Factory who happens to be in a place of mental insecurity right now because he kept repeatedly losing to the railroady antics of overpowered NPC enemies. 

Embers - a new Bionicle Epic - Coming 2024 

Class Is Out - A Farewell To Corpus Rahkshi - Chapters/Review

BZPRPG Characters - Minnorak, Kain, T'harrak, Savis, Vazaria, Lash

BZPRPG Mercenary Group - The Outsiders - Description - History - Base

Ghosts Of Bara Magna - Ash Tribe - Precipere - Kehla, Somok, Skrall, Gayle, Avinus, Zha'ar

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Reworking Kaiba

 

Name: Kaiba Blader

 

Character Type: Villain (anti-hero)

 

Appearance:U9ruUQp.png?1

 

Abilities/Equipment: Titanium carbide katana and wakizashi, remote boomerang blades, Strength and speed 3x that of an average hero, sensor fins(One LADAR(Basically Radar, but with a laser rather than radio waves), one Seismic), cold fusion power core, electromagnetic palms and feet.

 

Bio: One of 100 prototype hero robots who were decommissioned long ago, Kaiba was given a full refurbishing following his actions on Mechna, details of which are hard to find, much less confirm. Now working vigilante work, he occasionally shows up to help in an unofficial fashion when not working his own cases.

Edited by Strider!
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I'm inclined to agree with Dane on this one. While it is canon that Hero Factory has previously allowed reformed criminals to come work for them, I'm not sure they'd let someone who is still actively breaking the law train their rookies. 

 

Given that, and in spite of the negative connotations the term carries, I still think Kaiba would fall under the classification of villain. 

Embers - a new Bionicle Epic - Coming 2024 

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BZPRPG Characters - Minnorak, Kain, T'harrak, Savis, Vazaria, Lash

BZPRPG Mercenary Group - The Outsiders - Description - History - Base

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Other issue would be he wouldn't be training/helping Heroes because he's a villain, and breaking the law. Also he's still a Huge Dork.

 

I'm not sure what a LADAR does but my first thought was "detects lads". I don't want to be corrected.

 

It looks like the Blader one we approved earlier but changed to be a civilian, so I can't see any other problem. Just either change the backstory to suit his type, or change the type and backstory.

  • Upvote 3

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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I'm not sure what a LADAR does but my first thought was "detects lads". I don't want to be corrected.

 

Too bad.

Embers - a new Bionicle Epic - Coming 2024 

Class Is Out - A Farewell To Corpus Rahkshi - Chapters/Review

BZPRPG Characters - Minnorak, Kain, T'harrak, Savis, Vazaria, Lash

BZPRPG Mercenary Group - The Outsiders - Description - History - Base

Ghosts Of Bara Magna - Ash Tribe - Precipere - Kehla, Somok, Skrall, Gayle, Avinus, Zha'ar

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Why must you ruin my dreams

 

Anyway, thanks for changing to Villain. But by "help in an unofficial manner", do you mean "turns up to fights to help the Heroes and then disappear into the night" or "unofficially works for Hero Factory"? The former's fine, but the latter wouldn't work. Remember- he's broken the law. The Heroes would want to arrest him to serve his time, not get him on the payroll.

Edited by ZippyWharrgarbl

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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 The Heroes would want to arrest him to serve his time, not get him on the payroll.

 

I agree that it's unlikely, but it's also not completely impossible. After all, the Hero Factory of this game has/had a Black Ops team, an assassin, an entire branch dedicated solely to hunting down rogue heroes. I don't see why the Factory, especially in its current state, wouldn't consider employing a trustworthy agent who isn't directly associated with the Factory. 

 

Plenty of rulers throughout history had private spies and assassins that their councils and cabinets were unaware of; I could easily imagine Makuro or Fortis quietly keeping someone like Kaiba on retainer. 

Embers - a new Bionicle Epic - Coming 2024 

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For a start, neither the assassin team nor the black ops team have been made up of villains currently with an arrest warrant.

 

Second, Fortis I'd deem more likely for that. Makuro's seriously more of a clueless inventor who wants to do good, and while I could nod along with Fortis being behind the assassins and the Black Ops, that seems a bit too dark and scheming for Makuro. Either way, if they needed someone, then they would likely go for someone not currently being sought for arrest.

Edited by ZippyWharrgarbl

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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Another angle that could be taken with Kaiba is the one utilizing the six-month time gap; something like a rehabilitation program within that time could have reaffirmed his loyalties to the Factory for his and the other Heroes' benefit. All it would take for him to be a free bot after that (I think) would be for a few higher-ups in Hero Factory to believe in him. Just an idea.  :)

"He who loves his brother most hits him hardest." -Vicarath.

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Vicarath's would be more likely. "We really should do something about this guy, but he's really kinda helpful at times so w/e" isn't really a thing that makes sense. If he's breaking the law, he doesn't get a free pass by helping Heroes fight villains sometimes when he's not breaking the law and he's in the mood for it. If you want him doing good, I'd suggest Vicarath's (really good, so give him a medal) idea- since he was already arrested by Hero Factory, maybe his compassion for his friend led Makuro to suggest a lighter sentence, if he assists them at Hero Factory. Something like that, maybe?

  • Upvote 2

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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Went back over the earlier profile; it all looks fine to me. Shade Approved x2, The Scalpel x1. 

 

 

While I'm also a little iffy about his excessive arsenal, I'm going to give a tentative Approval x2 to Morphos. It's worth mentioning, however, that in order to dissociate ourselves somewhat from the alterations our former GM made, we're planning to use a version of Mechna that's more in line with the Mechna that exists in canon. Story-wise, I think the excuse we were going to use is that the evil Mechna came from the mirror world, and has since been swapped back with the real Mechna.

 

 

No issues with your hero, so Ruby Approved x2.

 

 

Now, I do have some concerns about Night Stalker. His profile says he possesses a radar that allows him to detect incoming objects, yet I distinctly recall a situation in the previous iteration of the game where it was being used more like some kind of omnipotent sonar, to track the movements and actions of unseen opponents with very high accuracy. Likewise, his acid is described as being only mildly corrosive, yet it was being used to kill armoured NPCs near-instantly, and collapse entire buildings. So while I am going to give an Approval x2 to Night Stalker, it comes with a polite warning to stick to the limitations you've given him. 

 

Thanks for the feedback guys!

 

For Morphos, I changed it to only two pistols instead of four, one of each.

 

For Night Stalker, I clarified his radar ability.  When I wrote that part of his profile I meant that in addition to functioning as a normal radar (tracking objects and basic area mapping reliable only within 50 ft) it would also warn him of approaching objects, in the event that he was not paying attention.  Sorry for the confusion.

 

As for my going over the limits of his profile, that is partly the fault of me originally using him on the Lego Message Boards HF RPG, which involved characters who were essentially gods.  Meaning that version of Night Stalker could wipe out this entire RPG single handedly.  Thanks for the warning and I will do my best to stick to his profile.

 

 

Did I miss the third approval or did you guys miss this?

Edited by Vestak
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I'm building my character profiles asap. 

Name: Jax Beemer

Character Type: Hero

Abilities/Equipment: Two small wings and a stinger, much like a bee’s, delivering a fierce acid to those it makes contact with, corroding metal and organic substances. These all fold into a backpack-esque shape when undercover. A light fighter, used to quick punching. The wings are able to move Jax quickly around a skirmish or battle, but not long distances.

Appearance: CURRENT MOC: [http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?i=6404947] (please note that this was built when I was 10 years old) Ignore the Thornax launcher. Will be rebuilt soon.

Bio: Jax “The Bumblebee” Beemer is a loose-wire veteran fighter who is on extended order to roam the star systems near the Makuhero Rim. He takes care of local problems so that the rest of the Factory can focus on threats outside the local periphery. Once created, he immediately tore out of the Factory and went vigilante. Once the Factory finally got their hands on him (after about 6 months of Beemer's illegal hero work and an overzealous wild goose chase), the Factory (after jailing him for a bit) decided that it would be best to let Beemer go alone most of the time.

 

Name: Sarah Sylver

Character Type: Civilian

Abilities/Equipment: A drone camera retro-fitted by Jax with defense mechanisms such as two short-range electric bolts; a microphone; a tablet.

Appearance: Typical newscaster person; basically the character from the original shorts.

Bio: An on-scene reporter who travels with “The Bumblebee” to document his escapades and help with surveillance/intel. Very intelligent, yet snarky. Her sarcasm is legend.

 

Name: Athena

Ship Size: Small

Pilots/PCs: Piloted by Jax, with Sarah able to move about the ship. A small cell has been put in for detaining petty criminals.

NPCs: Sarah’s drone acts as a sort of astromech droid within the ship, constantly checking ship functions and specs.

Communications: Is able to connect with HQ from anywhere unless communications are somehow jammed or blocked.

Navigation & Drive: A VR navigations system in the cockpit piloted by Beemer. The traditional dashboard was completely removed in favor of the VR system to save space… and because Beemer thought it looked neat.

Weapons & Armor: Two karz-lance guns on the tips of the wings and two miniguns in front of the cockpit. A light energy shield but fairly weak metal plating once the shield is down.

Propulsion: What it lacks in armor, it makes up for in speed. One of the faster ships in the Factory, the ship can accelerate to incredible speeds and perform many maneuvers.

Landing: It can land on anything safely, with one landing strut in the front and two in the back.

Image: https://agngw.files.wordpress.com/2014/12/wpid-wp-1418670855872.jpeg

I fixed Beemer. His poison is now acid and his run ended in a short probation. A lot of this probably needs clarification because all of this is copy-pasted from something I wrote a while back for a LEGO magazine HF building contest.

"Remember when the comics forum had a lot of good stuff? Let's make that a thing again." -Kazi the Matoran

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The issue with that is that Kaiba still doesn't support Hero Factory's ideals. Or, at least what he perceives them to be.

 

and for the most part, he's doing more good than harm despite not having any legal obligations to fight crime or fight villains.

 

i guess the issue is that I don't like having him directly associated with a group he still distrusts

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That could be fun/interesting, though he'd still need to have found a way out of HF custody within six months. He was kind of on a spaceship and classified as a villain the last time we saw him.

 

edit = grammar corrections

Edited by Vicarath

"He who loves his brother most hits him hardest." -Vicarath.

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The civilian militia would have to be secret, I think. You can do more good than breaking the law, but if you're breaking the law, that doesn't get cancelled out by good deeds.

 

If he stopped breaking the law, sure, this is viable if he did some jail time first. They can't just give him a clean slate, since he's been breaking the law. Even if he did some good, that doesn't get cancelled out by good deeds. But you've mentioned that he keeps doing illegal things, which means that he would not be allowed to dance around teaching civilians. Just because he's a PC, doesn't mean he's excused of all consequences.

 

If you don't want to work for Hero Factory, you'd need him to do some time anyway. He was in custody, as Vicarath says.

 

Also, in regards to Beemer: as Roadhog says, a bit of jail would probably also mean he was fired, since he went out and directly disobeyed Hero Factory to break the law for six months. I have no idea what he was doing that was illegal, but you've mentioned it was. You added my thing about a wild goose chase, but I feel like you misunderstood- I meant you could include that instead of having what he was doing be outright illegal.

 

Vestak, someone'll get on it soon. It's a bit hard for me to peruse pages in a phone.

 

EDIT: Oh hey Skyler's profile is on this page

 

Well, the only thing I have any issue with is the weapon, but that's only because I'm not sure if 1-2 seconds is long enough. But that could just be me, and everything else looks really good! approved.

Edited by ZippyWharrgarbl

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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Wait, we can post?

 

No, they posted the game topic so that they can ban people from posting.

 

That's all topics are good for nowadays, everyone knows that. [/s]

 

(in all seriousness though an actual announcement in this topic along the lines of "PEOPLE CAN POST NOW" would have been helpful)

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@Dallior: Eh, depends. If a Hero's walking down the street and sees a mugging, they don't need Hero Factory's express permission to stop it. But, since it was six months of presumably not reporting in to Hero Factory and just doing whatever, that'd be illegal, I think. Which brings us back to "there is a much better chance that he'd lose his job". Poor bee man. :c

 

This all said, if you put him down as a villain who just keeps protecting Hero Factory despite being fired and eluding all attempts to arrest him, that could work, and also makes me laugh a lot. They keep trying to arrest him but he just buzzes off to protect Hero Factory another day, despite multiple restraining orders and arrest warrants. I believe in him.

 

@Roadhog: If your character's approved, yeah. Which reminds me, I should get on that.

Memoirs of the Dead entry: The Unknown Turaga, a tale from the late Chronicler Kodan's journal.


Strakk's Best Friend, the story of a confusing yet somehow canon friendship.


Terrible Comics, a collection of comics that are terrible.

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