Skyward Stooge: The Final Chapter

[ShadowBionics]

Since I don't enjoy writing this series anymore, but I still feel bad that I never finished it, I've made a compromise. Here is the ending just as I had planned it. It will be a one-shot that takes place after Nokama (Zelda) is abducted by Ghirahim at the Sealed Grounds. There will be no more Zelda-Bionicle spoofs after this as I no longer wish to write them, and it seemed for a long while no one really enjoyed them. I still want to finish it, so this is the best I can do. Here we go.

 

 

 

 

*After having lost Nokama to the now fully enraged Ghirahim and his merry band of misfits, Lewa, enraged himself, charged through the time gate in the Sealed Temple and wound up in the Temple of Hylia as it was in the past. He looked down to see Lariska down on the floor.*

 

Lariska: Lewa!

 

Lewa: Am I late?

 

Lariska: Are you going to ever let that go?

 

Lewa: Nope.

 

Lariska: Well, no time for that, you have to hurry! Ghirahim and his minions have gone outside. I tried to stop them, but I couldn’t hold them off.

 

Lewa: Still useless to the end, aren’t you?

 

Lariska: What was that?

 

Lewa: Nothing, I’m heading outside.

 

*Lewa went through the doors, just in time to be greeted with Nidhiki, Krekka, and the newly anointed Toa of Shadow Elitha.*

 

Krekka: Duh, I’m the captain. You shall not pass.

 

Lewa: Look, I wasn’t happy-amused by your antics the first time, and I’m still not now.

 

Nidhiki: You may as well give up, young one, for you have no hope left.

 

*Nidhiki signals below, where Lewa looks to see Ghirahim dancing the Macarena to a floating unconscious Nokama.*

 

Ghirahim: Soon, my master will be back once this ritual sees full fruition!

 

Elitha: It’s pointless, Lewa… you have lost. But you can still come over to the winning side, if you want.

 

Lewa: Elitha, I don’t know what happened to you, but I’m not joining you.

 

Nidhiki: Elitha! Stop chatting him up.

 

Elitha: But Professor, I should at least give him some option. He is the only one who was ever nice to me back on Skyloft after all.

 

*With that distraction, Lewa bolted through the two of them and made his way down, but not before Ghirahim intervened.*

 

Ghirahim: Good help is so hard to find these days.

 

*With the snap of his fingers, he created a large barrier that spiraled all the way down to the center of the chasm and a horde of the red squealy guys started to take form.*

 

Ghirahim: Go! All of you! I don’t care how many of you go down, I just need you to stall him for time! The Demon King will return!

 

Lewa: Oh, great, more of the red guys… Just what I wanted to see.

 

Fi: MEGAMAN MEGAMAN!

 

Lewa: Shut up, Fi!

 

*With little to no effort, Lewa plowed through the Bokoblin horde and in no time made it to Ghirahim.*

 

Ghirahim: Good help is really so hard to find these days. No matter. My mistake was showing you mercy all those times, thinking you would have the basic survival instinct to run away. Yet you showed up. Again. And again. And again. Well, no more. You could say I am a weapon of destruction, and this time there will be no mercy!

 

*As Ghirahim spoke, he enacted a transformation into what looked like an evil version of Fi, even with his own obvious weak spot to boot.*

 

Lewa: Are you at all bothered by this, Fi?

 

Fi: What do you mean?

 

Lewa: Mata Nui, you’re so annoying.

 

*Sadly for Ghirahim, his last stand was literally his last stand, as he was very easily whooped and thrown all over the place… and by that, I mean he kept falling off the floors he created for their fight.*

 

Ghirahim: I have not known anyone with such skill and power before. Boy, what are you?

 

Lewa: I’m just a guy who got woken up too early one day.

 

Ghirahim: Well, it matters not. You see, the ritual I began continued on, and now it is complete!

 

Lewa: What?!

 

*In horror, Lewa watched as the Imprisoned, still alive in this time line, arose from the ground, its monstrous whale form with feet and rows of sharp teeth marching right towards Nokama. It opened its mouth and began to suck the soul right from out of her, Nokama screaming in pain as it happened.*

 

Ghirahim: Can’t you see it? It’s all over now! You have lost!

 

*Nidhiki, Krekka, and Elitha arrived just in time to see the Imprisoned take on its true form… His true form. A large, hulking mass of armor stood before them, eyes glowing a deep crimson from the Kanohi Mask of Shadows he wore on his face. He tested out his body, moving his fingers and flashing a smile of such animosity. The Demon King had returned.*

 

Ghirahim: Welcome back… Master.

 

*The Demon King stopped smiling, flexed his arm outward and delivered an attack that sent Ghirahim falling backward. Then, slowly Ghirahim’s body rose by the power of the dark king. From the obvious weak spot, a hilt of a sword began to emerge. Ghirahim was laughing the whole time until the full weapon was ripped out of him and in the hand of the Demon King. Ghirahim’s body dissipated and merged with the sword.*

 

Teridax: You there. You three. Who are you?

 

*The trio looked at one another, confused. Before any words could be exchanged, Elitha found herself being lifted and drawn right to the Demon King himself.*

 

Teridax: You wear my Mask of Death. Are you the one? The one fit to by my herald?

 

*He held his hand over his face, fingers sprawled.*

 

Teridax: I see. You are the one.

 

Elitha: I’m not really into the whole levitation thing, so if you could--

 

Teridax: Silence. Mademoiselle. I present to you an offer. Willingly become my herald, or be cast into the shadows where you will forever spend the rest of your days. Mademoiselle. What is your answer?

 

Elitha: Why? I don’t even know who you are! I was told I would be free to do as I pleased once this was all done and over with!

 

Teridax: A pity. Truly a pity.

 

*Before Elitha could argue, the Demon King reduced her body to loose atoms, leaving only behind the Mask of Death she wore. The mask was lifted to face the evil king, who laughed to himself.*

 

Teridax: Elitha’s Mask. Yes… may you serve as a Horcrux to my purpose, and be cast into the very shadows you refuse to serve!

 

*In an instant, the mask was phased out from view, gone to places unknown. The evil king then turned to Nidhiki and Krekka, unleashing a shadow hand and then pulling them both into his body, absorbing them fully.*

 

Teridax: Quite the appetizer… So, this is the form the mighty Hylia has taken for herself. Truly a pity. This pales in comparison to the beauty and magnificence of her previous form.

 

*Teridax sent her flying away, and before Lewa could react, he could hear a familiar voice calling out to him. There he was, running at full speed down to their location…*

 

Matau: Don’t worry, Lewa, Matau’s got this!

 

*Nokama landed right in Matau’s arms as they both fell over.*

 

Matau: Lewa… I caught her! She’s all right!

 

Lewa: Phew… Now to take care of you.

 

*Teridax gave a cold, harsh laugh that rang throughout the chasm. He then put his legs into a triangle pose, bent his left arm in front of him, and pointed his right hand at Lewa.*

 

Teridax: You and that other fool dare to stand against me? How amusing, to think the cowards I fought those years ago begot such fools like yourselves. Very well. Since you seem so eager to meet your demise, I propose a challenge for you. I shall create a place worthy for such a challenge. There, I will wait for you for a short time. If you so choose, you may try to meet me or you may run away and enjoy what little time of life you have left. And when you lose, the world will become mine and mine alone.

 

Matau: Give him a what for, Lewa! Oh, and listen up, Granny told me it’ll take some time for him to fully absorb Nokama’s soul! There’s still time to save her! All you have to do is beat that grease wad before it happens! You’ve got to do it! You’re… all she’s got now.

 

Lewa: I’ll accept your challenge. And I’ll make sure Nokama gets her soul back.

 

Teridax: Very well.

 

*He lifted his sword skyward and dark energies from the sky began to flow into the blade.*

 

Teridax: Follow me to where you will meet your most untimely demise, and witness the reign of a true king!

 

*And with that, he was gone, only a portal standing where he once stood. Lewa took a few steps forward, took a deep breath, and raced right through it. There, he was transported to a dark, cavernous place.*

 

Teridax: Good to see you made it. Now, I will unleash the power of those two miserable fools I absorbed tenfold!

 

*Teridax’s body began to shapeshift and grow until he resembled something that looked like an enlarged Krekka, but slightly deformed and with the upper body of Teridax growing out from behind the head. He transformed into Bizarro-Teridax, a true abomination of form and power.*

 

Lewa: Then let’s get it started. I’ve fought monsters way bigger than you, and you’ll be no issue.

 

Bizarro-Teridax: Your words are strong, but how are your skills?!

 

*He began by launching attacks from Krekka’s arms that were meant to poison and blind Lewa, but Lewa managed to parry and dodge them. Bizarro-Teridax then used Krekka’s arms to make a grab for him, but this allowed Lewa to grab onto his arms instead, running quickly up them to the Teridax half, and delivered some precise sword slashes to him, disrupting his form.*

 

Lewa: What is it with you guys and obvious weak spots?

 

Teridax: GRRRH! Then let’s see you try this!

 

*Teridax began to shapeshift again, this time with a body resembling the lower half of Nidhiki fused with a swirling vortex and the upper body of himself with eight wings and a Nidhiki claw. Safer-Teridax was readily sending various shadow-based magic attacks at Lewa, catching him a few times, but not deterring him.*

 

Safer-Teridax: You foolish little whelp! Do you truly think you have a chance against me?!

 

Lewa: Your overconfidence is your weakeness!

 

Safer-Teridax: Your overabundance of courage is yours.

 

*Sadly for Teridax, to keep that form he required constant energy, which he continuously burned through with each attack.*

 

Teridax: What?! No! Fine. We settle this by the matter of the sword.

 

*Teridax brandished the Dark Master Sword and Lewa in turn brandished the Master Sword himself. The cavernous area gave way to a white voice with nothing but water and clouds, which suddenly turned gray and gave way to a thunderstorm that raged. Teridax lifted his sword, allowing a lightning bolt to hit it, and sent it flying at Lewa, catching him off guard.*

 

Lewa: What?

 

Fi: MEGAMAN MEGAMAN! You skyward strikes will not work here!

 

Lewa: Can you give me some actual good news for once?

 

Fi: My analysis confirms you may substitute the skyward strike in a way similar to the Demon King’s methods.

 

Lewa: If Ghirahim is the evil version of you, does that mean he’s just as annoying.

 

*On the other side of things.*

 

Ghirahim: Master, my analysis confirms that you are indeed looking FABULOUS today and have no signs of wearing down.

 

Lewa: Sorry I asked. Well, if that’s the case…

 

*Lewa lifts his sword skyward, as does Teridax, but with great timing, Lewa caught a lightning bolt first, powering his sword, and he sent it flying right at him, knocking him over. Then with one last ditch effort, he delivers the final blow.*

 

Teridax: Do not think this is over, fool… A curse shall follow those like you and the girl forever and eternity. The blood of the goddess and the spirit of the hero… My hatred is ever-lasting, and an incarnation of my hatred will live on. There are others out there like me… You will never escape your fate!

 

*As his body weakened, he dissolved into a green substance that was pulled into the Master Sword. He, Fi, and the Dark Master Sword were teleported back to where they once were. The Dark Master Sword itself stopped responding, as if no spirit inhabited it. Like with Teridax, Ghirahim’s spirit was also banished to the Master Sword.*

 

*Lewa walked into the Temple of Hylia, where he overheard Nokama and Lariska talking.*

 

Nokama: Please, come with us, Lariska!

 

Lariska: No, young one, I have my duty at this temple.

 

Nokama: Aw… *She took one of her bracelets and put it into Lariska’s hands.*

 

Lariska: Don’t worry, Nokama. You will see me again. And next time, you will not see it coming.

 

Matau: Hey, great works guys in this little adventure I’d like to call “The Legend of Matau.”

 

Lewa: Sure, keep telling yourself that.

 

Fi: Master, a moment of your time?

 

Lewa: What is it now, Fi?

 

Fi: My mission has been fulfilled. Even now I feel my consciousness fading.

 

Lewa: What do you mean?

 

Fi: It is time for you to plunge the Master Sword into that pedestal where I can be at rest and guard the remains of the Demon King.

 

Lewa: So, you’re saying it’s time for us to part and we will never see each other again?

 

Fi: That is correct.

 

Lewa: Okay. Later!

 

*Without warning, Lewa strikes the pedestal and Fi is sent into her never ending slumber… that is until a young, much happier dimwit who also went by the name Lewa found the sword, but that’s another story for another day. With that, the three of them went through the gate, which fell apart, never to be used again. They turned to see the old woman waiting for them. It was then Nokama noticed the bracelet she had given to Lariska was on her wrist.*

 

Old Woman: See? I told you that you wouldn’t expect it.

 

*Nokama was overjoyed, but then overcome with sadness as the Old Woman’s body began to fade. She, too, had fulfilled her duty, and now she was gone as well.*

 

*After the bit of mourning, there was much rejoicing now that the Demon King and the threats on the surface world and Skyloft were no more. It was not long however before Lewa and Nokama made the decision to remain on the surface as destiny called them. And at that point on, the land of Metru Nui was founded by the first King and Queen.*

[MetaStriker]

For the record, as a huge fan of Zelda and BIONICLE I've always appreciated your works, and this one was no exception. While I'll admit it's been a long time since I originally read ​Skyward Stooge​, this final chapter was still humorous and a great conclusion to a great comedy.

 

Furthermore, I give you a lot of credit for wanting to give the story a proper write-off, as that's how I've felt in regards to my own series of comedies. I do wish we were getting a Breath of the Wild-spinoff, but if you're done, you're done and that's okay. Thank you for the memories.

 

(excerpt from ​Tahu's Consequence​, Special 2, posted June 30th, 2017)

---

Narrator: You know, it’s weird. I can see Comedy City right above us.

 

TSO: What? I can’t see it.

 

Narrator: Although it does look somewhat barren. I don’t know, I remember during The Fire Chronicles the city was bustling with content. MT Tower, Voltex Productions, The Lewa0111 Nuva Inn, ShadowBionics Skyscraper...gosh, I don’t know what happened.

 

TSO: From what it sounds like, I guess times have changed.

 

Narrator: I don’t even understand how you hear me. You don’t have ears.

 

TSO: Respect artistic liberties, dude. But I mean, the best you can do is keep those memories close to you. And embrace the new ones.

 

Narrator: (looks up to Master Inika Center, which stands tall in the air with NAW) You’re right. For once. I’ll never forget the memories we had together.

---

See you around the forums.

~MetaStriker