Twas The Night Before World Domination

[Mad Scientist BioBeast]

Chapter 1

“Uh… BioBeast?” The Dark Chronicler said, hating having to deliver the bad news. “I got bad news. Ratings are tanking for World Domination 101. Nobody reads it.””Yeah yeah, I know.” BioBeast said, waving The Dark Chronicler off. “But wait until people see the new chapter I have! They’ll love it!”The Dark Chronicler sighed. “Bio…”“It has horses, and puppies, and rockets, and a few chimmichangas… chimmichangi… However you say that.” BioBeast continued, ignoring The Dark Chronicler. “People will have to form a line to read it, cause the page will lag due to so many people reading it!”“Bio.” The Dark Chronicler said, his tone getting a bit stern. “Nobody will read it. People just don’t want to read about Chronn, Miha, and Fiva any more…” he sighed again. “World Domination 101, is stopping.”“Stopping? I don’t understand…”“World Domination 101 is over BioBeast. It’s over. Finito. Kaput. World Domination 101 is now a retired comedy.”

World Domination 101 presents:

World Domination 102, The Final Chapt-.

BioBeast laughed. “Don’t say that. Of course it’s not over!”The Dark Chronicler looked at BioBeast strangely. “What do you mean? This is the part where we do some big storyline thing and try to save the comedy!”BioBeast shook his head. “Dark. You don’t get it. It’s Christmas time! We have to do a Christmas Special!”“What?!”

World Domination 101 presents:

Twas the Night before World Domination

BioBeast pointed at the sign that he had hung up. “See? Now we have to do something Christmas-y.”The Dark Chronicler just sighed. This was going to be a long Christmas... “But BioBeast, we don’t have any Christmas themed stories! How are we going to come up with any by Christmas?”It was BioBeast’s turn to sigh this time. “Duh. We find a few in the ‘Vault.’”“The ‘vault?’” The Dark Chronicler asked, scratching his head. “What Vault?”“The Vault.” BioBeast answered, walking into the writing room. “I’ll go get it.”“Uh… BioBeast? I hate to break it to you, but I don’t think we have a Vault.”BioBeast walked back into the room, carrying a pie. “Don’t have a vault? Don’t be silly.” He hefted the pie. “This is the vault.”“The pie’s a vault?” The Dark Chronicler asked, wondering when the comedy had lowered it’s self-esteem so low that it would allow Pie’s in it.“The pie?” BioBeast said, looking at the pie. “Naw, that’s just there for comedic effect.” He said, tossing the pie at The Dark Chronicler. He pulled The Dark Chronicler into the writing room. “It’s right there.” He said, pointing at Fiva’s Chimmichanga closet.“It’s in Fiva’s Chimmichanga closet?” The Dark Chronicler asked, now even more confused.“No, it is Fiva’s Chimmichanga closet.” BioBeast responded opening the closet. “Alright, let’s see what I can find…”

[Cadias]

A vault/ chimmichanga closet? Interesting. This being the introductory chapter, there isn't a lot to go off of. Can't wait for chapter two, though!

[Mad Scientist BioBeast]

Chapter 2

"Oh!” BioBeast said, showing The Dark Chronicler a video tape. “How about this one? It’s an old video I made!”“If it shuts you up for a while I’m all for it.” The Dark Chronicler said, putting the VHS into the VHS player. “Wow, VHS? I’m not even sure half our readers know what a VHS tape is…”“Hush you unimportant secondary character!” BioBeast said, jumping onto the couch. “It’s starting!”Junkyard whistled as he strolled through the snowy streets of Junkyardia. The Makuta was happy, because it was Christmas Time. And Christmas Time meant that more people would need radioactive ‘Mace’ to spray others with while shopping. And, being the richest weapon supplier in all of Junkyardia, he intended to provide all the angry shopping masses with Radioactive ‘Mace.’He scuffed his shoes on the doormat as he entered his facility where he hired all the poor people to work on the Radioactive ‘Mace’ and headed on up to his office, where he planned to count the obscene amounts of money that he had.“$3,141,592,653, $3.141592654…” Junkyard counted, grinning at his wealth. He was about to put it all away, satisfied with his wealth when he heard a voice at the door.“Hello? Junkyard Sir?” a timid Toa of Fire named Virthee asked.“Yes, what is it?” the Makuta answered, bored with the conversation already.“I was wondering if we could take Christmas Day off.” Virthee replied. “Seeing as it’s a holiday, and that you keep us in the factories so long that we could have you arrested for enslavement.”Junkyard looked at Virthee strangely. “I’ve tried to be patient, and I’ve tried to be kind. Can you tell me what I’m doing wrong, am I loosing my mind? I didn’t ask for much, just complete devotion to me.” Junkyard took a breath and stood up, pointing at Virthee’s Mysterio costume. “I gave you a hat, I gave you a cape-““Actually, I still have this junk because The Dark Chronicler hasn’t finished his Halloween story.” Virthee interjected.Junkyard cleared his throat, glaring at Virthee. “I even let you eat little crackers topped with honey! And instead of saying ‘Thanks’ you say ‘No more work!’ Come on Virthee, do you think that’s funny?”“Umm… Is that a yes?”Virthee trudged back to work, sadly reflecting on his past. How did I end up working for Junkyard anyways? He thought back a bit, queuing a flashback.“Hey, dad.” Miha said, walking up to Virthee. “I maxed out your credit card trying to take over the universe. Now we’re bankrupt and you have to work for Junkyard.”“Oh yeah…” Virthee remembered, getting back to work.Junkyard grinned. Sales for Radioactive Mace had already increased tenfold. By the day after Christmas, Junkyard would have enough money to take over the universe!“Get on the stage!” BioBeast whispered furiously, pushing Kirgon towards Junkyard’s office. “That was your que!”“But I don’t want to do it! It’s embarrassing to go out in public in this silly ghost costume!” Kirgon shouted, trying to run away. “Why don’t you get a real ghost to play the ghost part?”“Back in the time when A Christmas Carol was written, all the ghost’s parts were played by people!” BioBeast replied in a whisper. “It’s tradition!” He finished with a shove that pushed Kirgon into the office.“You’re going to get letters from my lawyer about this!” Kirgon snarkily replied, turning to Junkyard.“Who are you supposed to be?” Junkyard asked, looking at Kirgon strangely.“Hark!” Kirgon said, reading his lines. “O’ mylord! I come with disparaging news!”“Can it wait?” Junkyard asked. “I’m becoming ruler of the universe tomorrow, and need my beauty sleep.”“The people! They are starving! There is not enough time in their schedule for them to prepare a nutritious meal! Meanwhile, you feast on nutritious breakfasts every day! This is rottenness in the state of Denmark Junkyardia!”“And this concerns me why?” The Makuta queried, yawning.“Tonight, you will be visited by three ghosts, and we’ll see if we can’t teach you to be a bit more merciful.” Kirgon said, fading away. “GHOST KIRGON IS OUT! PEACE!”Junkyard shrugged. “Why do the loons decide to visit me?” he asked himself as he lay down in his bed. “Meh, doesn’t matter anyways. I don’t think the ghosts can bother me if I’m asleep.” And with that the large Makuta fell asleep.“Well darn.” Moylan, the Ghost of Christmas Past said. “How are we going to pester him if he’s asleep?”“We could beat him up.” Dreenan, who was the Ghost of Christmas Present said, shrugging her shoulders.“I don’t know. But whatever we’re going to do, we have to do it fast.” Aurix, Ghost of Christmas Future said, shrugging his shoulders. “I have some Ping-Pong balls on the stove in the future afterlife.”“Ping-Pong balls? You cook Ping-Pong balls?” Moylan asked, poking Junkyard with a stick in an attempt to wake him.“Yeah! Ping-Pong balls are delicious! They’re white rocks with a kind of yellowy stuff in them that you can cook and eat.” Aurix said, a large grin on his face.“Really?” Moylan asked. “We called those things eggs back in my times.”“Ugh…” Junkyard said, having woken up due to the constant prodding. “What is going on here?”“I’m the Ghost of Christmas Past. You know, and avenger of the souls that you’ve harassed.” Moylan said, rolling her eyes. “I would take you on a trip to your past, to show you your horrible past… But you had a great life and have no reason to be as rude and obnoxious as you are now. So… Shame on you.”“My turn!” Dreenan said, taking Moylan’s place infront of Junkyard. “I’m Dreenan, ghost of Christmas Present. And no, not the present that you open. Now let’s see… You’ve ruined your creator’s life, enslaved all the people in a town that you renamed after yourself…” Dreenan looked at Moylan and Aurix. “I don’t get it. What did he do wrong?”Aurix rolled his eyes. “Can't read your lines? Well fine. I’ll be short also. I’m Aurix, Guest Star of this comedy. I’m taking a break from the RPG to come and tell you what your future is like.”“Really?” Junkyard questioned. “Is it a deserted wasteland?”“Yep. It’s actually pretty great. But most people don’t like that, so I got hired to tell you that you should stop making radioactive mace. And to appear in this.”“So wait, Radioactive Mace caused the world to be destroyed?” Junkyard asked, a grin creeping across his face. “Great! Thanks guys! If I ever need any help destroying the world, I’ll be sure to call you!”

The End

“…That’s it?” The Dark Chronicler asked, wondering what on earth he had just watched.“It seemed funnier in my memory…” BioBeast said, heading towards ‘The Vault.’ “Maybe the next one will be funnier…”

Edited December 26, 2011 by Noble Knight BioBeast

[Mad Scientist BioBeast]

Chapter 3

Every single Toa and Matoran liked Christmas a lot

But Miha, who lived up in her room, did not.

For when Christmas came, the noise levels were absurd!

She couldn’t even hear herself think even a word.

They’d sing, and they’d laugh, then again they’d sing sing sing!

Their singing was what made Miha hate this Holiday thing.

Then, the evil Matoran got an idea,

An awful, spite fueled idea.

“I know what I have to do today!” she said, mimicking a TV show,

“I’ll steal Christmas! Everything but the snow!”

And with that, the small Matoran sneered,

For the festivities were almost here.

She donned a red hat and suit,

She was ready to give Christmas the boot!

She clamored onto her roof, hookshot at the ready,

Poor Link was tied up, (Thanks to Navi he was mentally unsteady.)

When Santa flew by, his Naughty/Nice Meter in hand,

She hook-shotted onto the sleigh of the large man.

“Hello.” Miha said, rubbing her foot as she had landed on a burr.

“My name is Miha, and you’ve ruined my Christmas, you cur!”

With that she tied up the poor fat man,

And took off in the sleigh, ready to finish the second part of her plan.

All the windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air.

All the villagers were dreaming sweet dreams without care.

Miha quietly snuck into her house, an empty bag in her fist.

She looked at the presents on the ground, grabbed them, then struck her house off her list.

As she left her house, planning to rob the other’s.

Something made a noise, so she looked around. What did she see but her brother?

“Santa?” the poor Toa of Ice asked, rubbing his eyes.

“Why do you take our presents?” he asked, “Why why why?”

But Miha was smart and slick

She thought up a lie, and did so very quick.

“These presents were delivered to the wrong house.” She said, her voice filled with guile.

“Your father wouldn’t approve if you took other’s presents.” She finished with a smile.

And with that she patted the Toa on her head,

Then kicked him until he got into his bed.

She visited the other houses on the block.

Robbing them of everything, even the clocks.

And when Christmas came, Miha waited,

For the despaired cries of the townsfolk her breath was baited.

But the noise she heard was not sad,

In fact it sounded glad!

And as Miha listened to the happy townsfolk

Something deep inside her awoke.

And as Miha felt something deep within herself stirring,

The reformation of her conscious was occurring.

And that new conscious told her what to do,

*Insert Record Scratch Here*

“Wait a second!” The Dark Chronicler yelled, interrupting BioBeast’s narration. “Are you saying, that all of the stories in our vault, are just carbon copies of regular Christmas Stories?”“Umm… Maybe?” BioBeast answered. “It’s what everybody else does.”“I cannot believe this!” The Dark Chronicler yelled. “I expected more from you BioBeast! Something original!” The Dark Chronicler turned towards your screen. “If you want to see how this story ends, just go read ‘How the Grinch Stole Christmas.’ Goodnight!”

[Cadias]

“Yeah! Ping-Pong balls are delicious! They’re white rocks with a kind of yellowy stuff in them that you can cook and eat.” Aurix said, a large grin on his face.

Nice Navayak reference. :PThe end of chapter three was definetely unexpected, and the same with chapter two. A little odd, but they weren't carbon copies, which is always nice. Are there going to be more chapters?

[Mad Scientist BioBeast]

@CadiasYes, there's one more. The one I'm posting now. Also, thanks for reviewing.

Chapter 4

“This one’s called ‘Twas the Day of Christmas.’” BioBeast said, holding up a poem.

“Sounds like another parody of ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas.’” The Dark Chronicler responded with a sigh. “But I’m sure you’ll use it anyways…”

BioBeast cleared his throat before saying, “Alright, here we go.”

Twas the Day of Christmas, and all throughout the office

There wasn’t a noise, for Chronn wasn’t conscious

He was asleep, his feet resting up on his desk

(For those not in the know, this is a burlesque)

He woke with a start as the bell on his door rang

But settled down when he saw it was Fiva, using some slang

“Yo dog,” Fiva said with a grin

“You missed the great ole’ shindig!”

“We did the Macarena, and the Line of Conga”

“And guess what? There was even a chimichanga!”

Fiva exclaimed all this with an eager attitude

Chronn however was not in the mood.

“What are you doing?” Chronn questioned with a glower

“We don’t have the money to spend on your parties.” he finished, his tone very sour.

“You spend Christmas partying day and night,””But never realize that on Christmas there’s always a fight.”

“On Christmas crime runs rampant,”

“But when it comes to stopping it, you seem to be absent.”

Chronn lectured the poor Toa of Fire

Fiva, stood there, enduring Chronn’s ire.

When it was apparent that Chronn was going to say no more,

Fiva began to speak, his face grim, his feet on the floor

“Although you are right, crime runs rampant all night,

And on Christmas there is always a fight,”

”I do party with my friends, Miha and Icarin,

And the fireworks we use, do a lot of sparkin’

I do this in the spirit of Christmas, Chronn don’t you see?

There’s another party tonight, won’t you come with me?”

Chronn’s will, oh how did it waver,

Then it steadied, just like Charles Xavier’s

“Go to a party?” Chronn scoffed at the idea,

“I’d just as soon go to the Capital of North Korea.”

Fiva walked towards the door, leaving Chronn behind

He headed towards a party, up for which he had signed.

On his way, he passed a hefty man in red

The man’s breath smelled of Garlic Bread

Fiva and friends partied for an hour

Then they all went home, needing a shower

Fiva however headed to the Police Department,

Hoping to find Chronn, and maybe some Fire Retardant

When he reached the door a strange sight he beheld

There were Reindeer, most of which smelled

There were one, two, three… Eight, no wait nine!

That was about the number of Reindeer that Fiva did find

He looked beyond the Reindeer and there in the snow,

A great sled, and inside a burrito to go

Fiva grabbed the burrito, and scurried into the office

And there was Chronn (This time, he was conscious)

Chronn was glaring at the large red man, who gave him a smile

“Who are you?” Chronn demanded, his tone quite vile

The Fat Man laughed, “Ho-Ho-Ho!” giving a verbal tic,

“Santa Clause, Father Christmas, Saint Nick.”

“I go by all those names,” Santa said, his belly shaking

“Right,” Chronn said, his head aching

“We have a mental institute, run by Zygad,”

“Don’t worry, I’ll take you there, the place’s not half-bad.”

Santa laughed, then extended towards Fiva his arm

“Do you believe I mean you no harm?”

Fiva shook his head, confused at the matter,

“I don’t know, right now my brain’s as gooey as pancake batter.”

Santa sighed, disappointed in Chronn’s lack of Christmas Spirit,

“Chronn my dear boy, you just got to shear it,”

Santa continued, noting Chronn’s confused face that made him look like a clown.

“Your barriers, your walls, that let no one in. You must take them down.”

“Take down my barriers? You gotta be joking!”

Chronn exclaimed, his ears now smoking.

“Those barriers keep me safe,

From criminal’s that like to strafe.”

“They protect me from deceivers and scum,

and especially pirates, and their rum.”

Santa’s face fell, his smile now a frown,

“Maybe the only way you can change is with the help of this clown.”

With that he pointed to Fiva,

Whose drool was frozen, making a stalactite of saliva.

“He’s the only one who can change you now,

He’s also the only one who would talk to a cow.”

Santa stormed out the door, and jumped in the sleigh,

“C’mon Dasher, Prancer, and Cupid, let’s get a move on, sometime today!”

And with that the sleigh lifted, and flew away

But in the distance you could hear St. Nick say,

“WHO TOOK MY BURRITO?” he yelled into the night,

Fiva just chuckled softly as he took another bite.

“Come Chronn,” Fiva invited,

“The party’s waiting.” He finished, excited.

“No.” Chronn said, refusing again.

“How many times do I have to pound this into your brain?”

Fiva sighed and put his hand on Chonn’s shoulder

“Your heart couldn’t get much colder.”

He said this, his face filled with sadness

“I know, I know, the streets are filled with badness.

But year after year, you leave your friends that you hold dear”

Chronn tried to interrupt, but stopped when Fiva gave him a leer.

“Yes, you give presents of, money, and toys

And even little action figures for those rowdy little boys,

But the one thing that you do not do,

Is allow your friends to enjoy the present that is you.”

Fiva said this, poking his finger at Chronn’s chest,

Chronn started to argue, then the fighting spirit just left,

He sighed, and hung his head

For what he was about to say, filled him with dread.

”You said there was a, party at Virthee’s and Miha’s?

I’ll go get my suit, just wait here, or play on the See-Saw.”

Chronn said this as he left the room,

Then came back, dressed, and well-groomed.

Fiva laughed as Chronn came out, a laugh that was hearty

And with that, Fiva and Chronn left for the party,

And if you listened closely as they walked out of sight,

You could hear Chronn mutter, “Merry Christmas to all, at least for tonight.”

“…That one wasn’t so bad.” The Dark Chronicler said with a grin. So, are we done now?”

BioBeast nodded. “Yep. G’Night! Have a Merry Chirstmas everybody!”

END