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Comedy Forum Expo: Fall 2012

Comedic Federation iBrowisaduck

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112 replies to this topic

#41 Offline Voltex

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Posted Oct 20 2012 - 06:33 PM

Wait, a third story in that trilogy?I am gladly awaiting it.Also waiting for the LoZ spoof. I rather like your spoofs SB.Now then, it's already the 21st in Australia, but I'll wait another five hours.

Yes, or even 10 hours. =P It's only 7:30pm where I live, and I imagine it's around same for most of us.-ibrow

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CHAPTER 3

 

Tune in for the most brutal death yet.

 


#42 Offline Onarax

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Posted Oct 20 2012 - 07:27 PM

@TNTOS: Yeah, I read the first two.@iBrow: Well I'd be probably sleeping by then.
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#43 Offline SkywardStriker16

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Posted Oct 20 2012 - 11:04 PM

Voltex, Rarity, and PB: Cool, can't wait to see you then.FRONT PAGED.ALSO finale of TAoT is up. Check it out!~MN~
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THE ASHES - The not-so-long-awaited-but-somewhat-appreciated sequel to The Fire Chronicles.

THE ANNIVERSARY EDITION OF TAHU - The rewritten-but-still-somewhat-original comedy that started it all.

Hey guys, sorry that it's been a while, but with the return of BIONICLE I couldn't resist coming back to my old home. Can't wait to reimmerse myself in this great place!

-Striker out

 

 

 


#44 Offline Rarity

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 12:32 AM

We're on the front page! :DHopefully we'll get a lot of people checking this out now!
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#45 Offline Phovos

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 06:53 AM

I'M SORRY!*sits in the corner, crying frantically*I haven't been able to get on BZP at all! This strange Cloud Flare kept on coming up every time I opened BZP or anything!I just read through all your stuff, and it's un-freaking-believable. The awesomeness levels in here are through the roof! And why am I pretending to be Scout? I don't know any more! Bonk!
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#46 Offline Onarax

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 06:55 AM

To laugh or not to laugh, that is the question:

Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer

The Memes and Gags of outrageous comedies

Or to take arms against the sea of clichés ...

Nononono not Hamlet! I don't want no Hamlet in my?!! ....

Alas, poor Hubert, I knew him well, Comedians; a fellow of finite jest, of most fabulous fancy; he hath written for me a million times; and now, how despised in my lacking imagination it is! My face is palmed at it. Here hung the nose that I have punched I know not how oft. Where be your snarks now? Your groaning? Your terrible rapping skill? Your flashes of annoyance, that were wont to set the table on a crusade for your death?

Ahem, anyway, as you may already know, I am the Ordinary Magician, but I also go by the name of Hubert. You may recall that it had been stated that today was the day when It's a Gundam! would be presenting his comedy, but I recently changed my name, so you will be seeing me instead. Along with a slight increase in the propensity to shoot lasers.

So, after a year of not writing any comedies whatsoever, with my only involvement here being one of the slightly more active Critics of the Comedies Critics Club (You should really request more criticism from us! We need more business!), I have decided to actually try writing another comedy.

To the surprise of many, it will not occur in the shared universe which most of my comedies are part of, not including the original 'BIONICLE: Sheer Awesomeness!'. This time, I wish to free myself from the baggage that comes with writing for that shared universe, which usually prompts me to add Zaphos and throw out overused memes that make absolutely no sense.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, I am reducing meme content by seventy percent.

Of course, all of you may be interested in what exactly I am trying to write, so let me explain. After stealing some of Lielac's bio-mechanical plot bunnies, I have come up with the genius idea of writing a Slice of Life story focusing on the minor Matoran that have only appeared in MNOG and MNOG2, and possibly in the CD-thingamabobs, because they need more love. However, I will not be setting such a story on Mata Nui, but on Metru Nui.

Because Metru Nui is perfect for Slice of Life.

Now then, I would not be able to leave you if I didn't let you all see a short snippet previewing the first chapter of my upcoming comedy.

~~~~~~

The Ordinary Magician presents ...

An Awesome Studios Work ...

Dr. Amaya: Or How I Learnt To Stop Worrying And Love Kanoka Disks

The hard thing about being a teacher, thought Amaya as she looked around her empty classroom, was that the students were too obedient. Sure, she enjoyed the peace and quiet along with the simplicity of teaching them, but she yearned for at least one of her students to follow the rules less rigidly and do something that could make her class less monotonous. It was incredibly boring teaching her class, and although they made her quest for the position of Exemplary Teacher much, much easier, there was no fun in teaching without any challenge.Oh how she wished to be in her colleague's situation; Nokama's class was passionate enough about studying, but were energetic and restless as well, disobeying their teacher at times. Although as she continued to think about her friend's class, she remembered Vhisola, Nokama's incredibly clingy and possessive student. She shuddered at the thought of having the other Ga-Matoran as a student; there was no way she could survive with such a person following her everywhere and nosing into her private life."I should be going to the Labs instead of moping around here," she sighed, packing up her things.Of course, that had been her plan until a certain Ta-Matoran student (a rather surprising thing, seeing that very rarely did those of Ta-Metru ever become students) of hers had decided to come in and interrupt what would have been an incredibly boring day."Hey there Amaya!" said Tiribomba cheerfully. "I have an awesome idea!"The teacher sighed as she turned to face her student. Tiribomba had a good heart, but his ideas were not very logical or good. At all. She shuddered as she remembered his last idea. She still hadn't managed to get the smell of Great Temple Squid out of her mask."I'm not interested," replied Amaya, heading towards the door of her classroom. "I don't want another repeat of last time.""That wasn't my fault! How was I supposed to know that Great Temple Squids could do that?" he protested."Nevertheless, it was your idea that lead to it.""Come on, at least hear me out this one time?"Amaya hesitated at the sight of Tiribomba's irresistible Hapaka-puppy expression. It had been said that he could tame even the Kanohi Dragon with such a face, and she did not argue with whoever had thought up the saying. Although it may have been illogical, using Tiribomba's face on the Kanohi Dragon was an untested approach, so it could be possible."Fine," she sighed. "What is it?"Tiribomba grinned. "We ... are going to find the super magical Kanoka Disks of Destiny!""... What?!"

~~~~~~

Well then, ladies and gentlemen. Dr. Amaya: Or How I Learnt To Stop Worrying And Love Kanoka Disks will be coming to the Comedies forum around Christmas, so make sure to keep an eye out for it! I apologise for the shortness, but I wouldn't want to spoil you guys too much wouldn't I?

So have fun reading it when it comes out!


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#47 Offline Voltex

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 09:03 AM

That looks pretty sweet. http://www.bzpower.c...tyle_emoticons/default/cool.png Also, yay, it finally went up! I kinda figured they would do it halfway, but hopefully we'll get some more traffic now.If we don't, BZPower doth not like us. :(However, that certainly appears to be an interesting comedy, and it'll be neat to see the characters that nobody uses get used in starring roles.-ibrow
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CHAPTER 3

 

Tune in for the most brutal death yet.

 


#48 Offline King of the Madness Isles

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 11:39 AM

Good stuff happening here, will check out the third installment of the Legend Trilogy, and everything else here.

Dr. Amaya: Or How I Learnt To Stop Worrying And Love Kanoka Disks certainly sounds like an original and great idea. Will read!


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"The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. No more half measures Walter."


#49 Offline MT Zehvor

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 12:04 PM

Looks good so far, everyone. Interesting sticking Hamlet into Bionicle-ism.-MT
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#50 Offline King of the Madness Isles

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 03:37 PM

By the way MT, as part of out CFE festivities, can you fix the link to Mad House in your sig? It currently leads to Almost There, and so does the Almost There link. There need not be two links to Almost There.
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"The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. No more half measures Walter."


#51 Offline Onarax

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 04:10 PM

Looks good so far, everyone.Interesting sticking Hamlet into Bionicle-ism.-MT

Nah, was just quoting Hamlet for fun. But seeing that it is interesting, I could stick some Hamlet in ...

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#52 Offline Scanty Demon

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Posted Oct 21 2012 - 06:51 PM

Well tomorrow is my turn, just need to prepare my speech and choose an excerpt of my comedy to post. Shouldn't be too hard, but this is actually the first time I'm confident about a comedy I'm posting (co writing with TNTOS helps too) and my first comedy in the new forums. Probably posted little after 4:30, wish me luck.
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#53 Offline JL Zehvor

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 02:22 AM

Dat last name....Is it russian?
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#54 Offline Scanty Demon

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 03:28 PM

Mr. Dzerzhinsky stepped onto the stage, the audience was looking around worriedly because he said he had his agents all around them. He seemed to take no notice of this though as he stepped up to the podium. He brushed his suit and straitened his hat before he spoke."Good afternoon comedy goers," he said with a slight Polish/Russian accent "I know you are very excited to see what I have and should look at this as a privilege. You see when I took over this profile, I exiled the original person who owned this profile. Looking through his things, some of which I found to be quite odd, but one thing I found was this comedy. I liked it so much I decided to contact this person, TNTOS, who he was working with, and asked him he wanted to continue with me." Dzerzhinsky gave a small wave to TNTOS, who waved somewhat nervously back. He tried to leave his seat but was stopped by one of Dzerzhinsky's agents who held out a pair of realistically looking vultraz's feet. Mr. Dzerzhinsky continued "When mr. TNTOS agreed (with a little persuasion) I sent some Cheka agents of mine to look for this....er interesting fanfic, most did not comeback sane. So in order to fight this the original co-writer of this "mst" decided to do that do something special to it. So I studied every detail of the exiled person to get his personality right. Thus we created something that we hope you find amazing."What have we done you ask? Well in the comedies section there are two ways to write a comedy. One is the use of script format which is quite popular and prose form which occasionally do better but are harder to write. What we have done is something that the comedy section has seen, we have done something I say revolutionary. We have combined these two forms of comedy writing into a single comedy. This is something called MSTing named after the popular tv show Mystery Science theater 3000. The format is where characters riff and remark on bad movies here it applies to fanfic. Now we will demonstrate this revolutionary concept me and Mr. TNTOS hope to bring to the comedies." Felix turned to the large projection screen behind, and with a simple hand gesture the screen lit up to show... slide show in Russian (If one were to translate it'd say "The Revolution and you. Why you should stop worrying and just relax). However with another hand gesture the slide changed. The title read: A New Destiny by Katuka. Then the room darkened and the comedy began.New DestinyBy Katuka*Hi! Im Katka, this is my third fanfic so no flamez. Bonicle was my fav toyline til lego was stupid and ended it and replacedit with Hero Faitry. Bring it back LEGO!!!!!1!!1!1 Here's my fabfic. Original charter dont steel. Enjoi.Nuhrii: Her character must be very special indeed if she's warning us not to "steel" it[/sarcasm]Muharin: well anyone who does is seriously lacking in brain power indeedChapter 1 Life changinMuharin: Wow who knew the number one could change lives?Nuhrii: I always liked the number 2 better, myself Katuka Serenity sat in her algebrs 2 class and sighed. Mr. Stenso was teaching the clas about logarithms, she aready new this. She was 17 years od but looked 21, she also the prettiest and smrtest girl in school. Every1 in the school said she sould be a model but she aways told them she'd be a veteran ironNuhrii: What do you have to do to be a "veteran iron"?Muharin: Date a Toa of Iron? Her stuning sliver locks reflected the sunlite shining through th windo. every boy wanted to date her but the way thy looked at looked at he disgustd her. 1 feature that was the most stuning bout her, beside her goddess body, was her urple eyes no one else she had them.Nuhrii: I had purple eyes once, but my doctor told me it was a resurgent childhood illnessShe always wondred why she had them. Her parents never told her y she had them Sense her rents died wen she was 4 years old.Muharin: Honey I don't think they died.Nuhrii: She probably has purple eyes because it's a resurgent childhood illness."Who can tel me wat the answer to log8(X-7)=log8(X+4) is?" Mr. Stenso asked looking around the class. Katuka raised her hand, Mr. Steno saw it. "Okay Katuka, what is th answer to this question.""X=11," she repled cofindent she was right.Muharin: Unfortunately the class was blinded by Katuka's lock of hair, so they were unable to answerNuhrii: I'm no math wiz, but I have a feeling that's not the right answerMuharin: Same here"Sorry Katuka its X=11/2," Mr. Stenso replied "But that was a good try." Katuka began to brek into tears, she new it was the rite answer Mr. Stenso was wrong. Shr would 1 day show him he was wrong.Muharin: (katuka) YOU WILL PAY!!Nuhrii: Holding petty grudges? I'm liking her alreadyMuharin: I did that onceNuhrii: Yeah, what was it for?Muharin: I'd rather not say *starts crying* don't throw me again!Nuhrii: O_o okay let's move onThe bell ran and the class left th room "Rember class pages 112-113 2-34 evens for homework tonite," Mr. Stenso called to the class as the class left.Katuka walked passed the students til she got to he locker wiping her tears. Next to her locker to boys were talking about only th most populer and greatst toy of there generatin,Muharin: Gundam? Roboriders? Exo-Force?Nuhrii: I know! Galidor! It has to be Galidor!boinicel. It was the beast thing sense sliced bread, there was no one on eart who didn't have them.Muharin: DarnnitNuhrii: *sniffs* I wanted it to be Galidor . . .
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#55 Online Endless Sea (still alive)

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 04:16 PM

This would be incentive to restart MLWTB if I could actually get Tempo to notice me. T_T
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I'd actually have something of substance to say here, but I'm too lazy to think of anything.  >_< Er, have some BZPRPG profiles, I guess?

 

I used to help Dominus Temporis with writing MLWTB back in the day, even if I was really terrible at it.  If anyone's in contact with him, could ya help me get in touch?   :)


#56 Offline Scanty Demon

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 06:05 PM

Dat last name....Is it russian?

Felix was born in Poland, but it was part of the Russian Empire at the time he was born. So it's most likely Russian and Polish, half and half.

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#57 Offline Voltex

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 06:36 PM

It certainly seems interesting - I'll check it out when it's released! Although hopefully the prose segment won't parody bad writing quite so much. =P-ibrow
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CHAPTER 3

 

Tune in for the most brutal death yet.

 


#58 Offline Scanty Demon

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 06:43 PM

iBrow, there will technically be two prose sections: one the bad parody section, and the one with way better writing which will be between a certain number of chapters. I only showed the bad prose admittedly, but I do have a good prose section that will be in the beginning a little in the middle, and in the end. So yes we have combined Prose and script hope it works out.
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#59 Offline MT Zehvor

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 07:20 PM

Excellent day, Herr Dzerzhinsky. Shall keep watch for Katuka to show up in official topic form. Should be entertaining.And with that, the baton appears to have passed on to me. Fun filled day tomorrow addressing the final season of Aftermath 2, the continuation of the TBTTRAH Series, and Oppen Turtle Style.-MT
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#60 Offline King of the Madness Isles

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 07:33 PM

Good job Felix and TNTOS, I'll check that one out. I love satire, and making fun of people who do things horribly. Endless sea, fancy seeing you here. I actually found a comment from Toga on the BZP Wiki and replied to it (I replied a while after he posted it though, don't know if he saw it). But if you could get in touch with him, I would love to see more MLWTB. Loved that comedy. Just wish I'd made an account before August 2010.And MT...Oppen Turtle Style? That sounds amazing. Please let it be a video.
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"The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. No more half measures Walter."


#61 Offline JL Zehvor

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 10:23 PM

It's Oppan. Lit. Big bro style.And that grammar....Half of me is interested. The other half asks to go kill yourself.
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#62 Offline Scanty Demon

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Posted Oct 22 2012 - 10:45 PM

It's Oppan. Lit. Big bro style.And that grammar....Half of me is interested. The other half asks to go kill yourself.

That's actually the point, also my inner writer attempted suicide multiple times, we stopped at 13 to save him.

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#63 Offline Onarax

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Posted Oct 23 2012 - 12:21 AM

Ah, MSTs.I LOVE YOU MAN.
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#64 Offline TNTOS

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Posted Oct 23 2012 - 09:12 AM

It's Oppan. Lit. Big bro style.And that grammar....Half of me is interested. The other half asks to go kill yourself.

That's actually the point, also my inner writer attempted suicide multiple times, we stopped at 13 to save him.

Unfortunately, my inner writer is on life support. Shouldn't have pushed him so hard.-TNTOS-

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#65 Offline MT Zehvor

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Posted Oct 23 2012 - 12:26 PM

Well...it appears to finally be MT Day. And with that, comes all sorts of fun things, involving a new installment in the TBTTRAH series, some heads up for the final season of Aftermath 2, and some general information involving the CFE for next Spring and the CF as a whole.First off, I promised a dancing turtle, and here he is...although his dancing was so terrible, he was instantly struck down and turned to stone.Posted ImageOh well. Rest in a Bizarre Pose, you crazy dancing reptile.Anyways moving on to Season 10 of Aftermath, Rise from the Ashes...I literally have absolutely no "sneak peeks" to show at all. I am just that lazy.However, this season, while it will indeed wrap up the main Xenon storyline with the Zehvor, will also focus quite specifically on the house and the Bionicle residents of it. Past characters who haven't shown up for quite a while will return in bizarre ways to lend a hand during both the Zehvor's final battle as a team, and the House's final battle against...well...against society. Bionicles hate society.Also, something will be occurring towards the end of this final season of A2 which will split the two story arcs. Afterwards, the TBTTRAH storyline and the Zehvor storyline will be separated into two different comedies: The TBTTRAH part going for the much more humorous, ridiculous style of the old TBTTRAH, and the Zehvor portion covering a bit more serious, epicomedy style that has been more prevalent since 2009.So with that, here is the official announcement of:THE BIONICLES TRY TO RUN A MANSIONWhich will be showing up likely around January of 2013, or whenever the last season of Aftermath 2 ends. To put it briefly, with no spoilers, some rather important event will have the Bionicles leave the house at the end of A2, and, to that end, they will end up settling in a mansion in Hawaii, with new surroundings, new situations, new faces, and, of course, old friends alike. Just a brief introduction to some of the numerous characters who will be appearing as a lead role in this comedy...=======TAHU: Toa of FireRuler of the Bionicles and Diplomat to the Hero FactoryPosted ImageCo-ruler of the House since 2004, he now takes on a bit more responsibility as the leader of an entire mansion.He also is not particularly fond of Hero Factory sets due to their antics in the past. Has developed a distaste for scented candles.=======XPLODE: Sarcastic Grape Juice FanPresident-Elect of the Hero Factory Sets and a Star in an HF ShortPosted ImageDespises the Barraki, and Pridak in general. Has acquired a liking of Grape Juice.A fierce fighter in the war against Tahu's extreme "Anti HF" policies.=======BLARGH: Poorly Designed MoC(Poorly) Trained Assassin working for the Hero Factory SetsPosted ImageAn MoC gone terribly wrong, Blargh now seeks revenge against the skill-less Bionicle MoCers.Also runs a Hot Dog Stand in his free time.========SAMUS ARAN: Artist (Un)ExtrordinareBounty Hunter taking down Hero Factory VillainsPosted ImageThe Samus action figure now earns her keep following Tahu's orders to take down the HF villains.Currently attempting to get a liberal arts degree from an online college.=======So there's a look at four of the main characters of TBTTRAM, which, as mentioned before, will likely be appearing in January.As for the Zehvor...there is still the matter of their story. What happens to them after the events of A2? Where do they go from there? And why do they leave the house?The answer can be found in two places. First, the end of Season 10 of Aftermath 2, and secondly, the continuation of the Aftermath series...AFTERMATH 3: A NEW CHAPTER OF TRIALS Set 24 years after the end of Aftermath 2, Aftermath 3 will star an entirely new hero, a once hero turned villain, and a cast of old characters attempting once again to save a planet from an undesirable fate.More details cannot be released yet, as it contains major spoilers for the end of A2, but this will be shown off in much more detail at the Spring Expo.Until then, guest star spots are still open. Feel free to send me a PM if you'd like in.========So that wraps up just about everything new from MT factories and associates. As for the direction that the CF will be taking this next year, we're hoping to get involved quite a bit more, perhaps with some comedy related RPGs or games in the G&T Forum.That's it, everyone. Thanks for taking the time to read this, and I'm looking forward to the next year of comedy writing.-MT

Edited by Toa Zehvor MT, Oct 23 2012 - 12:32 PM.

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#66 Offline Voltex

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Posted Oct 23 2012 - 02:17 PM

I can't wait for both comedies! When you first released Aftermath 2, I was excited to see the two storylines becoming more seperate, and was somewhat disappointed when they didn't. I think it'll benefit both to be free from the other for awhile.-ibrow
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CHAPTER 3

 

Tune in for the most brutal death yet.

 


#67 Offline King of the Madness Isles

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Posted Oct 23 2012 - 06:49 PM

Great job, MT. Will catch up with A2 and follow it to the end, and will definitely read Aftermath 3. Sounds like a dramatic...well, conclusion actually. I hope not, but at the same time, let a fitting finale be so. Still room for the spin-offs, right? Mansion looks great, can't wait for early 2013. Well, actually I can, because I don't want to miss Halloween or Christmas. But point is, good job.-PurpleBouncy (just to copy ibrow's post because I'm THAT horrible of a person)
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"The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. No more half measures Walter."


#68 Offline SkywardStriker16

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Posted Oct 23 2012 - 08:59 PM

TBTTRAM looks great. Certainly should be more comedic than A2.You really should make a simpler acronym though.A3 sounds cool too. Can't wait for that, but then again, who wants to miss Halloween and Christmas?(haha copied you PB)~MN~
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THE ASHES - The not-so-long-awaited-but-somewhat-appreciated sequel to The Fire Chronicles.

THE ANNIVERSARY EDITION OF TAHU - The rewritten-but-still-somewhat-original comedy that started it all.

Hey guys, sorry that it's been a while, but with the return of BIONICLE I couldn't resist coming back to my old home. Can't wait to reimmerse myself in this great place!

-Striker out

 

 

 


#69 Offline JL Zehvor

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 02:08 AM

Set 24 years after the end of Aftermath 2, Aftermath 3 will star an entirely new hero, a once hero turned villain, and a cast of old characters attempting once again to save a planet from an undesirable fate.

I know who the main enemy of Aftermath 3 is. It's.........MT! !!!!TBH, I've enjoyed having more separate storylines. I found myself liking it more during 2009, 2010 and 2011 Pre-Downtime stuff where the Zehvor would go on adventures while the house guys would go housing, and usually the mingling stuff happens on road trips which ends with a big Xenon boss.2 separate stories sound good! Of course, they'd intercross over at certain points, with the same set of chars appearing, but I'm guessing that the POV is different.As for the all new hero, it's probably Spazdok. Or whatever his name is.

You really should make a simpler acronym though.

PREPOSTEROUS!

Edited by Jl1223 X, Oct 24 2012 - 02:09 AM.

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#70 Offline Onarax

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 04:04 AM

Oh good, once you get onto Aftermath 3, I will be given enough time to index every chapter of Aftermath 2 and Aftermath.Then ... I SHALL GET TO WORK ON AFTERMATH 3.
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#71 Offline King of the Madness Isles

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 03:25 PM

Yes, Hubert! INDEX! INDEX UNTIL YOU CAN'T INDEX ANYMORE!Oh, and JL, you broke the ibrow copying chain.-PurpleBouncyEDIT: Oh, this is my 350th post. What a way to make your 350th post.ANOTHER EDIT: Ooh, I'm a "Steely Visionary".

Edited by PurpleBouncy, Oct 24 2012 - 03:26 PM.

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"The moral of the story is, I chose a half measure when I should have gone all the way. I'll never make that mistake again. No more half measures Walter."


#72 Offline bioniclehero01

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 03:30 PM

Tis' is my turn now? Yey! So, I'm going to skip right to the meat and potatoes here and then get to the announcements;Fun with Taka & Tahu (Remake Preveiw)"Would you like fries with that, sir?"This was one of life's great contemplations.No, this question is not about making bad eating decisions. It’s much, much deeper than that. Instead it’s about how far we've gotten in life. It's about where we're going. It's about our future…And if you've been asking that question everyday for the last eight years, then you know your future is pretty well going nowhere."Uh… What kind of fries are they…""The fried kind. You want them or not?"The fat man just stared at the menu being held up by the ugly clown statue, the Toa at the drive through window just staring out into nowhere, bored with his life."Uh…" the fat man finally said, "Do they come with ketchup?""They come with whatever you want as long as you get out of here quickly. I need to get home and contemplate where my life went wrong.""Uh…""Just take the fries.""Nah, goes straight to the hips ya’ know. Just give me onion rings instead."Too bored to even bother pointing out how entirely idiotic that logic was, Taka just sent the man on his merry, cholesterol filled way.What had happened to his life? He was once a big shot actor! He was the star of his own show! Of course its budget consisted of an old pickle jar full of quarters and a wallet they found in the back alley, and sure it only came on during the middle of the night because they couldn't afford any real time slots, but still… It was sort-a his show. Even if it did kind-of stink.But who was he kidding? His life always stunk like left over fish left out overnight.So, here he was. Five years later. And the most he had to look forward to was waking up every morning to come to a job he always hated, with a boss who hated him almost as much as he hated himself."Taka…" a voice from the drive through window said, kind of creepily mind you, "Is that you?""Teridax?" Taka said, almost laughing at his luck. Out of all the things he missed about his old life, Teridax was not one of them."Actually, it's two 'r's now." Terridax corrected, "I'm so filthy rich one 'r' wasn't doin' it for me."Him? Rich? Is he having another nightmare again? Sometimes it was hard to tell the difference."I just got back from buying an island." Terridax continued, pointing out New Zealand on his globe, "You may have heard of it." Why’d he keep a globe in his car?"You're rich? How on Earth did you get rich? Last time we saw each other you still had to have help getting your shoes tied.""Ah…" the arrogant rich Makuta remembered the days nostalgically as Taka noticed the pile of Benjamin's buckled in the passenger seat, "I miss those days… Remember that time I almost lost a finger trying to open that sandwich bag?""That was your assistant. And he did loose it. Two of them, actually.""Really? Are you sure?""Yeah. You stomped on his hand so hard the doctor's had to amputate them."Terridax just started laughing, tossing hundred dollar bills in the air carelessly as he did so. A large portion flew out the windows to the gleeful surprise of the cars behind him. "Guess that’s my memory for ya' huh pal?""Yeah, sure." Takanuva said annoyed, "Just tell me what you want. You're holding up the line, and, honestly, I'd rather talk to anyone but you right now. So please, just order."Terridax didn't even pretend to hear Taka, too busy playing with his money. "Well, I better be goin'. Places to go, money to throw away, you know how it is. If you ever want a job, I just bought like a bunch of businesses. Just head on down. I'm always glad to give out charity."Taka, steaming, just let himself imagine punching Terridax in the face as he took the business card. Oddly it didn’t make him feel better. Also just thinking it made his hand hurt… Hitting an ego that big could put a person in the hospital."I would ask if I could come over sometime, but honestly, I don't want to be seen anywhere near your place. The ‘hood’ ain’t exactly kind to my image, y’know? Anyways, I’m gonna go buy Bill Cosby now. See ya’!”Taka just stared in his wake as Terry drove off in his sports car, money blowing out the windows as he drove away screaming something about pancakes, IHOP, and something about the Cosby show. :tohu: :tohu: :tohu:Some things… Some things you just do not talk about.Take this for example. Say you were, hmm… A psychotic serial killer. Okay, now keep that in your mind. You wanna' kill someone, right? 'Cuz you’re a psychotic serial killer and killing people is kind what psychotic serial killer's do. It's their place in this world, in a really disturbing sort-of way.Okay, now let's say you're out one night. Right? Minding your own business, looking through possible prey. So, where would you go? The park! That's where you'd go! No one's gonna' notice a missing hobo nearly as much as your neighbor suddenly disappearing. So? What do you do?You stroll through the park wearing creepy emo clothes.This was their train of thought. Only, they're morons."You sure this is gonna work?" Hero asked, scratching because the polyester gave him a rash."Of course it will, we're dressed the part." Ingeitum corrected as he struggled with his afro."Really? I mean, look at us...""Duh. Only sociopaths would dress like this.” Ingeitum reminded his friend as they walked through the dark canopy of the trees, of course during the afternoon 'cuz late is when the weirdo's come out. Ingeitum pointed to a woman who was just staring at them like they'd just broke out of a mental health facility. "C'mon? Look at that woman? She's afraid of us, why? Not just because we no she's up to no good, but because she's doin' somethin' illegal.""She's taking her kids to the playground.""Well then what's the container for…?”"That's a stroller.""You're so naïve." Ingeitum just shook his head, disappointed in his old friend, "Just listen. I'm gonna' go shake the suspect up.""Wait… What?""Do you know nothing of cop lingo?""I used to be a cop." Hero exclaimed, "Pretty sure we never said that.""Fine. Just stay here while I go crack this whip."Hero just watched in horror as Ingeitum approached the poor soccer mom. Suddenly he remembered the reasons he never took him to the suburbs. Last time… Well let's just say it involved a sprinkler, a weenie dog, and a couple dozen bullet shells and just leave it at that."Hey, you, we need to have a chat cat."The woman looked at him, noting his odd attire. "Why are you dressed like hippies?""Don't sass me." Ingeitum said sternly, "Or my hip attire, dog.”"Sorry to break it to you, but disco died a couple decades ago.""You think I'm stupid or something?" Ingeitum, offended, struggled to recover his fake toughness, "I was at the funeral. It was sad too. Rock n’ Roll never showed up and Pop was consistently trying to steal the spotlight from everyone else. Now, tell the truth, what're you doin' here at this time of the day…""I promised my kids…" the woman replied, trying to figure out if Ingeitum was crazy or… Well, yeah, just crazy. “Kind of regretting that decision now.”"This late?""It's two in the afternoon.""I said no sassin'!" Ingeitum warned, waving a Nerf gun in the air, "Now tell me! What're you up to here…?"The woman just stared at him a long moment, Hero off in the distance pretending he didn't know either of them. "Look, buddy. I don't know who you are, but you're either leaving now, or -"Out of a nearby brush, a hobo wearing an 'I'm with Stupid' t-shirt jumped out screaming something about fried chicken and dumpsters, then ran up to the woman and stole her hat before speeding off. And, worst of it all, he was running like a blind man on hot coals."Did you see that!" the woman exclaimed, "He stole my grandmother's hat! Do something!""Don't change the subject!"Hero just facepalmed, and found himself running after the hobo. And the sad part, this was his daily routine. Only instead of hobo's it was usually the pizza man, who was in turn chasing Ingeitum because he didn't tip.Now, what was that I was saying about psychopaths?Now, for Announcements!First and foremost, the preview you just read there was from a remake of the original T&T. My basic idea here is to improve upon the original without changing the concept too much. I just want to give the best quality I can, and just don't feel the original was that. I want to add a more focused, thought out plot with more well-rounded, fully developed characters with a lot of character development. Which brings me to the next announcement;I intend on featuring a lot of new characters in the story. Especially regarding the B-Team. For those unfamiliar with the old comedy, or just needing a little refresher, the B-Team was essentially a parody of you're heist gangs/action heroes (think Oceans Eleven crossed the A-Team and you got a good idea). The original featured these as nearly all guest stars, mostly as I wanted to have some form of an audience involvement. But now I will be completely re-imagining that team with entirely new, original characters.The most important aspect of this though is that Teridax will no longer serve as main villain. He's still in the story and the plot still revolves around trying to rob him blind, but a completely new character will be introduced as the antagonist. I don't have much on the new character yet though, so I won't say much there as more than likely I'll change a lot later. But I might update this post later tonight with a little more details here, but no promises.And last but not least, this will be an entirely pre-written comedy. Meaning it might be a couple months before it's posted, but when it is you'll get updates on a good regular basis without any delays. But for a good estimate as to when you'll probably see it; think sometime around February as it'll probably end up shorter than it's predecessor too.So, give me you're opinions on the preview and tell me what you think I could add to improve upon the original. If you read it, were there anythings you would like me to leave out of the remake? Things you'd like more of?P.S. TO THE NUIMOBILE 2.0!! :tohu:

Edited by Mr. Chicken, Oct 24 2012 - 04:07 PM.

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Nothin' to see here folks. Just keep movin' along.


#73 Offline Voltex

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 03:38 PM

I am excited and wish to have a part in this. Release it soon or I kill something with RAAAAGE.I must see more.I'm not sure there are ways to adequately express my excitement.-ibrow
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CHAPTER 3

 

Tune in for the most brutal death yet.

 


#74 Offline SkywardStriker16

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 05:34 PM

Oh...so you're the author of FWT+T...I was wondering who that was.That being said...this remake looks awesome.Will defintely read it.Tomorrow's PB, right?~MN~
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THE ASHES - The not-so-long-awaited-but-somewhat-appreciated sequel to The Fire Chronicles.

THE ANNIVERSARY EDITION OF TAHU - The rewritten-but-still-somewhat-original comedy that started it all.

Hey guys, sorry that it's been a while, but with the return of BIONICLE I couldn't resist coming back to my old home. Can't wait to reimmerse myself in this great place!

-Striker out

 

 

 


#75 Offline Voltex

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 06:31 PM

Yes. And then I kick everyone's butts, because I have four new comedies I'll be releasing, plus a bunch of awesome promotional stuff.-ibrow
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book_2_logo_v2_small.png

 

CHAPTER 3

 

Tune in for the most brutal death yet.

 


#76 Offline SkywardStriker16

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 08:13 PM

FOUR WHAT?!?!?!?!?Well, that's just nuts. Good luck, PB.~MN~
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THE ASHES - The not-so-long-awaited-but-somewhat-appreciated sequel to The Fire Chronicles.

THE ANNIVERSARY EDITION OF TAHU - The rewritten-but-still-somewhat-original comedy that started it all.

Hey guys, sorry that it's been a while, but with the return of BIONICLE I couldn't resist coming back to my old home. Can't wait to reimmerse myself in this great place!

-Striker out

 

 

 


#77 Offline Onarax

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 09:02 PM

Hail the Comedic Overlord of Doom.
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#78 Offline Scanty Demon

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 09:11 PM

Ah, MSTs.I LOVE YOU MAN.

Thanks, love you too. I thought BZP could use an MST or two ;)

It's Oppan. Lit. Big bro style.And that grammar....Half of me is interested. The other half asks to go kill yourself.

That's actually the point, also my inner writer attempted suicide multiple times, we stopped at 13 to save him.

Unfortunately, my inner writer is on life support. Shouldn't have pushed him so hard.-TNTOS-

Him, whoops, I still send him get well soon cards. He is in our hearts.

I am excited and wish to have a part in this. Release it soon or I kill something with RAAAAGE.I must see more.I'm not sure there are ways to adequately express my excitement.-ibrow

Four? You maniac, you utter maniac! You will doom us all with your comedies. You maniac!

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#79 Offline MT Zehvor

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Posted Oct 24 2012 - 10:47 PM

Four? You maniac, you utter maniac! You will doom us all with your comedies. You maniac!

That's it. You've crossed the line, iBrow.I was willing to put up with your sociopathic, homicidal tendencies when they were in your comedies......but now that they've spilled over here...it's very clear to me what kind of person you are.He is...the kind of sick man...who sends babies to preview his comedies.-MT

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#80 Offline JL Zehvor

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Posted Oct 25 2012 - 12:22 AM

Four?I dunno, You can just create a "iBrow's one shots' and then write 10 one shots there.So, tmrw is some IAMH?Finarry.
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