The Corrupt-A-Wish Game!

[Jobber]

Granted, but they're covered in katnip cream cheese.

 

I wish to be lord of BZP.

Edited April 9, 2015 by Anonymous User

[IcarusBen]

Granted. However, the island of Bzp is both barren and unpronounceable. TROLOLOLOL.

 

I wish that D5 can never eat bagels again.

[Onaku]

Granted. Five sided dice can now no longer eat bagles... not that they could ever do so in the first place.

 

I wish I knew how to fly

[Petewa]

Granted. You know how to fly into the engine of an airplane, good job,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish not to die until I grow old as dirt.

[Onaku]

Granted. You live for ever, but you don't stop ageing. This may seem like a stereotypical corruption of the 'live forever' wish, but consider the fact that by the time you're as old as dirt, you yourself will have become dirt.

 

I wish for dirt.

[Petewa]

Granted. You get the sapient pile of living dirt that is me,

 

 

 

 

I wish for a bagel,

[IcarusBen]

NO! NO MORE BAGELS! NO!

WISH NOT GRANTED!

 

Okay... I need to calm down...

 

I wish for sanity.

[Petewa]

Granted. But the sanity you get was stolen from someone who used to be called Red Hood,

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a bagel,

[Toa Doublebee]

Granted. Its Blagel, the evil Bagel champion from Jupiter! brother of that one Muffin I forgot the name of.

 

I wish for a bagel.

[Petewa]

Granted. It's Blagel's sidekick who somehow has arms and legs and a desire to Consume your soul.

 

 

I wish for amnesia,

[Onaku]

Granted. The videogame is packaged and delivered to your doorstep... wait, that's a good thing. Hmmm, how to make this work... OH! You also get localized amnesia that makes you unable to use the videogame.

 

I wish I knew how Petewa didn't see that delivering me himself as the living dirt was a good thing.

[Petewa]

Granted. I somehow still have control over my body and can kill you through dirt-things,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a bagel,

[IcarusBen]

You get a bagel, but it's lack of finality destroys your soul.

 

I wish for the worst thing ever.

[Petewa]

Granted. *insert graphically horrifying and terrific description of pain and dismemberment, the mention of which, causes Tohunga to die from fear*

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a Kaukau,

[IcarusBen]

Granted. Sadly, it's a Cowcow, so it's not a mask, but rather it's bovine.

 

Moo.

 

I wish for a fish wish.

[Toa Doublebee]

Granted. You wish for a fish. This wish is not granted.

 

I wish I could restart the day like in Tom Cruise, but I would't have to die in order to do so.

[evil_jaga_genius]

Granted.  You simply restart the day like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.  Over.  And over.  And over again.  Even when you put a toaster in the bathtub.

 

(Don't try that by the way...)

 

I wish for a Staff of Hunger.

Edited April 14, 2015 by evil_jaga_genius

[McNugget]

Granted, You get theater staff that hunger...

 

 

For your soul...

 

I Wish I had 1 million Dollars.

[Petewa]

Granted. It's counterfeit, you're arrested.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a bagel.

[IcarusBen]

NO! NO MORE BAGELS! You keep wishing for bagels, and I'm tired of it! WHY SO MANY BAGELS! ARGHHH---

Ugh.... Sorry. Granted, it's a poison bagel, you die, hooray.

 

I wish Petewa would just stop wishing for bagels.

[Onaku]

The wish has already been granted before, but since our wish granting power has no effect in real life, Petewa is free to continue wishing for bagels. I could just as well say granted, and add some corruption to the wish, but that wouldn't change this unfortunate fact.

 

I wish for Petewa to consider not wishing for any more bagels because it's getting old.

[Petewa]

Granted. I consider it, but in the end decide I need more fuel for my frankenstein device.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a bucket of bagels.

[Onaku]

You get a bucket with pictures of bagels printed on it. It is empty otherwise, although it's clear what it was used for prior to this (hint: human waste disposal)

 

I wish for a pie made out of bagels made out of muffins.

[IcarusBen]

Granted. You get a muffin made out of bagels made out of pie.

 

I wish for EXTREME ROBOT COMBAT!!

[Petewa]

Granted. You are both robots, the battle is to the death, both of you lose.

[Onaku]

Y u no wish?

 

I wish I were a big tree.

[Ghidora131]

Granted. Oh look! here comes Paul Bunyan!

 

 

I wish I could revive the aliens that SETI, the UN and HASBRO accidentally declared war on.

[Onaku]

Granted. They wage war on the human race, wiping everyone out (including you) with their overwhelmingly superior technology.

 

I wish for a meatball.

[Petewa]

Granted. A ball of live meat falls from the sky, lands on you, and cripples your body, you will soon suffocate if you don't eat your way out,

 

 

 

 

I wish for something interesting to do,

[Toa Doublebee]

Granted. massive paperwork.

 

I wish I had more time.

[Petewa]

Granted. You have all the time in the wold, and no one to spend it with but yourself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a better reputation,

[Toa Doublebee]

Granted. on 28/04/15 you stoped wishing for bagels, this has made you more popular among the members who frequent this thread by 20&.

 

I wish I had shorter pants. Most of my pants are too long for my hobbit legs.

[P~M]

Granted; your pants are so short that people can see your super hairy legs, and you're teased constantly.

 

I wish I had all the sets from the new Bionicle wave.

[Petewa]

Granted. But you were so desperate for them, you wound up resorting to petty theft and becoming as lost as the Marios in this: http://xkcd.com/1110/

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a better whip.

[Specter Knight]

Granted, but you have no clue how to use it and end up getting tangled in it,

 

I wish Super meat boy wasn't so dang hard.

[P~M]

Granted; instead, it becomes ridiculously easy and you get no satisfaction out of beating it.

 

I wish Lewa had better articulation.

[McNugget]

Granted, my Lewa 2015 set has better articulation. Thank you.

 

I Wish I Could unglue my face from the Computer.

[P~M]

Granted, but now you have glue covering your face and your computer, and you can't get it off either.

 

I wish Dragon11603 had some glue remover to solve all his problems.

[Petewa]

Granted. Though the remover could cause severe acne and destruction of glass, I advise against use on human skin or electronic devices.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish for a fedora,

[P~M]

Granted; wearing it makes all your friends shun you, calling you a "neckbeard" and a "creep."

 

I wish Target stocked Onua.