Jaysii Posted January 11, 2013 Share Posted January 11, 2013 Feel free to review my story "Pitch White" here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tommy_ Posted January 11, 2013 Share Posted January 11, 2013 Cool, is it going to be really long?Nice start, certainly makes me curious about the rest of the story! Oh and there's a small problem you should fix: First it says he hears the doorbell, but then he goes to see 'who knocked'. Quote I turned out to be exactly the grown-up I wanted to be.A child - but with a credit card.Kanohi upside down = epic beard.We've all tried it, don't deny it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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