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Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries

Hydraxon Karzahni Velika

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#1 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Jan 31 2013 - 12:43 AM

A bit of something new for me. I wanted to try something like this a long time back but I didn't know what to do. Given a lot of the mysteries of the Bionicle universe, especially those from the serials, I think there is something to work with now in addition to some of the already existent ones from the main storyline. Here we go... And before you ask, with this particular case the host is covering, there are going to be constant updates, so this first case isn't finished yet, before anyone asks.

 

 

 

Hydraxon: In the eve of one cold night, there had been reports of various deaths that all had something in common. Tonight we investigate one of those deaths, which would be the death of Karzahni, as well as review the life of the deceased. I’m your host, Hydraxon, and I like wearing this trench coat. Join me, and you might be able to help me solve a mystery.

 

*Insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

 

Hydraxon: Sometime in the waking dawn on the newly reformed planet of Spherus Magna, a somewhat dull mission turned into a frightening experience when two lone Toa discovered the deceased body of the insane ruler known only as Karzahni at the bottom of Iron Canyon. From there, his body was brought in and examined by our team of specialists.

 

Tahu, fire expert

Tahu: I can definitely confirm he wasn’t burned. Trust me, I know these things. I like to burn stuff.

 

Gali, healing expert

Gali: Karzahni had seemingly fallen to his doom based on a large part of his injuries. To fall from Iron Canyon would yield great harm to one’s self alone, but it gets worse.

 

Hydraxon: The two witnesses who discovered Karzahni had this to say…

 

Kopaka, strategic specialist and loser in love

Kopaka: Not only did Karzahni fall to his doom, but he landed on this little knife thing that was somehow waiting for him at the bottom of the cliff.

 

Pohatu, weapon specialist, napkin collector, local athlete

Pohatu: Actually, that’s an air sword.

 

Kopaka: … Who carries around this little stub and calls it a sword?

 

Pohatu: >_>

 

Kopaka: Oh… right. But that’s different!

 

Pohatu: Anyway, this is the Air Sword, usually carried by Toa Lesovikk.

 

Hydraxon: Toa Lesovikk, as a fallen Toa, had personal issues with the demented tyrant and sought to personally bring justice with his own hand. However, several months earlier, he was robbed of that chance when Karzahni was arrested by the Order of Mata Nui, taken in by the member known as Botar. Unfortunately, we were unable to get an interview before his untimely demise, as Botar denied privilege for any questioning.

 

Pohatu: Lesovikk just wanted to take matters into his own hands, for what he feels would be retribution for a lost chance being a hero.

 

Kopaka: Personally I think he’s just out of his mind. Even if Karzahni was the way he is, why go out and push him to his demise?

 

Hydraxon: While imprisoned by the Order of Mata Nui, Karzahni sought institution to help aid his shattered mind, which was made more insane by the ruthless Makuta Teridax. We have recreated the scene with these non-paid interns cosplaying as those who were involved.

 

Karzahni’s mind shredding re-enactment

“Karzahni”: I know about you Makuta and now I’m going to instill fear into you. *makes noises, puts hands on box head meant to represent Kanohi Olisi*

 

“Teridax/Maxilos”: You made a big mistake Karzahni. I don’t have nightmares. I give them instead. So take this for your trouble! *he makes noises, holds out his broom and aims it at “Karzahni,” who falls over and starts yells in pain.*

 

End of recreation

 

Hydraxon: It was from there, Lesovikk himself wanted to take matters into his own hands as the tyrant made a hasty escape and tried to show him some pretty pictures with his kanohi mask power. From there, he was taken in by Botar and put into a mental institution. We managed to get a hold of some file footage straight from the Order as documentation of Karzahni’s progress on his mental health. Sessions did not go so well. A warning to some of our more sensitive viewers.

 

Session #1

Therapist: Why do you feel the need to run from conflict?

 

Karzahni: I never run away! I always stand and fight!

 

Therapist: And yet you quit everything else you’ve ever done. You know, you’re only a failure if you never try.

 

[awkward pause]

 

Karzahni: Retreat!

 

Session #7

 

*Karzahni is wrapped in a straight jacket*

 

Karzahni: The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round.

 

Session #15

 

Karzahni, still wrapped up: Have the lambs started, Clarisse?

 

Session #22

 

*Karzahni is locked up in a dark room*

 

Karzahni: Fergalicious definition make them boys go loco…

 

Session #28

 

Karzahni: Where’s my rubber ducky?!

 

Session #32

 

*Karzahni is standing on his head*

 

Karzahni: Who turned the world upside down?! I can’t take it anymore!

 

Session #38

 

Karzahni: Is that you, Carly Rae Jepsen?

 

End of footage

 

Hydraxon: It was because of this lack of progress, Karzahni was deemed a lost cause and later sent to the Pit to live out the rest of his imprisonment.

 

Turaga Vakama, wise elderly type figure

Vakama: He wasn’t really good at rebuilding Matoran, either. The other Turaga and I had to fix the ones he had in his realm after they were relocated. One more thing. Makuta actually named a plant after him, which tried to attack me. One more thing. He was meant to be a tale everyone said just to frighten one another. I never thought he actually existed.

 

Tahu

Tahu: His injuries are fake.

 

Gali

Gali: How do you explain that?

 

Hydraxon: Somewhere out there, the murderer is still at large and is evading capture. Some believe he has gone south, changed his name to Vesolikk, and tried to create a new life for himself. He is seven feet tall with orange eyes, and was last seen wearing a Kanohi Faxon and green armor. If you or anyone has seen him or have any information, please call us. Coming up next… a glowing red object in the sky known as the “Red Star.” What secrets are linked with it? Later on, we take a look at a closer encounter with the Zyglak kind. 


Edited by ShadowBionics, Feb 11 2013 - 12:44 AM.

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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#2 Guest_X-G.12_*

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Posted Jan 31 2013 - 10:31 AM

well, this is certainly a humorous story :D if I read correctly, it would be done as a TV series. love those descriptions of Kopaka and Pohatu :D. napkin fetcher....XD


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#3 Offline Disciple

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Posted Jan 31 2013 - 11:53 AM

This is funny stuff. I liked the humorous little glimpses you gave of Karzahni's therapy sessions. Karzahni seems crazier than ever when he's making pop culture references. And did you mean for Turaga Vakama to sound a bit like Uncle from Jackie Chan Adventures? 'Cause either way, that is a hilarious thought. :P

 

"Tahu! One more thing!"

 

Looking forward to reading what you have in mind for the Red Star.


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#4 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Feb 01 2013 - 01:29 AM

This is funny stuff. I liked the humorous little glimpses you gave of Karzahni's therapy sessions. Karzahni seems crazier than ever when he's making pop culture references. And did you mean for Turaga Vakama to sound a bit like Uncle from Jackie Chan Adventures? 'Cause either way, that is a hilarious thought. :P

 

 

"Tahu! One more thing!"

 

 

Looking forward to reading what you have in mind for the Red Star.

 

I'm glad you like it. Karzahni is one of my favorite characters to write about, so I couldn't resist having glimpses into his sessions. Also, yes, Turaga Vakama is meant to be like Uncle from Jackie Chan Adventures. Glad to talk to someone who also remembers that show. :) The Red Star case is going to be very odd yet interesting. I have some ideas and I just need to figure out how to put them together, considering so many beings have done things in relation to the Red Star.

 

well, this is certainly a humorous story :D if I read correctly, it would be done as a TV series. love those descriptions of Kopaka and Pohatu :D. napkin fetcher....XD

Yeah, this would be more like a TV series sort of story. Each "chapter" is going to be treated like its own episode segment, but there will be times when Hydraxon will go back and forth between cases whenever any "updates" come in. So like the Karzahni case isn't done just yet, and he will be going back to it.


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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#5 Offline Dapper-Sama

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Posted Feb 01 2013 - 08:38 PM

Dude, this is genius. Keep up thy good work!


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#6 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Feb 11 2013 - 12:48 AM

Episode 2 of Unsolved Mysteries up and ready now...

 

 

 

Hydraxon: Many reports have flooded in about sightings of an object known only as the “Red Star,” as well as reports of strange occurrences. Tonight we look into these sightings and determine just what the “Red Star” is. I’m you host, Hydraxon, and I like collecting stuff. Join me, and you might be able to help me solve a mystery.

 

*Insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

 

Hydraxon: In the early times of the island of Mata Nui, there were sightings of a glowing red object in the sky.

 

Kapura, sad strange little man

Kapura: So it’s like right there in the sky, see? And it’s just right there! It’s there! I’ve seen it! I’ve seen it so many times!

 

Nixie, underrated character no one remembers

Nixie: I’ve done lots of research on this thing… but then I realize all my books were outdated. I’ve got to go book shopping more.

 

Turaga Matau, crazy old coot who’s supposed to be wise about stuff

Matau: It reminds me of the time I failed my astronomy test. I should’ve been nicer to that big-brain Nuju.

 

Kopeke, current chronicler and possibly eventual Toa

Kopeke: …

 

Hydraxon: Many inhabitants of the former island of Mata Nui reported these strange sightings time and time again, only for a majority of them to be either ignored of disproved as false.

 

Turaga Vakama, wise elderly type figure

Vakama: My friend Nuju has speculated time and time again about the existence of strange things like this. One more thing. I have a secret fear this Red Star might house unimaginable things not meant for us to know.

 

Hydraxon: It wasn’t until many years later and after the Toa Mata first arrived that anyone would start to learn anything else about the Red Star. When it started getting closer to when the Great Spirit would be awakened, it was Toa Gali herself who made this discovery.

 

Gali, healing expert, apparent astrologist

Gali: I was looking at the Red Star through the telescope, you see, and then… that’s when I could have sworn I saw beings living in the Red Star itself!

 

Tahu, fire expert, skepticism expert

Tahu: It’s totally fake.

 

Gali: What? How you do explain what I saw in the telescope then?!

 

Tahu: It was probably some prank the Matoran were playing on us.

 

Gali: Have you been talking to Turaga Vakama again?

 

Tahu: What does it matter?

 

Turaga Vakama

Vakama: One more thing… sometimes the Great Spirit works in mysterious ways… like when he played a really mean prank with the stars to make it look like my friends and I were never meant to be Toa. Never underestimate the Great Spirit!

 

Nixie

Nixie, face palm: I knew I should have bought the seventh edition, not the sixth. Mata Nui, I am so far behind on my studies! What else could I not be aware about?!

 

*Hydraxon is somewhat unsure about how to react to Nixie*

Hydraxon, somewhat confused: But is it really all an elaborate hoax? Another report comes in from the Toa Mahri, who share their experiences with the mysterious Red Star.

 

Jaller, bossy guy and self-proclaimed hero

Jaller: A few of my friends and I went off to Voya Nui to find the Toa Nuva. You know, because the Turaga were being all annoying and “One more thing!” about stuff. When we got there, we got shot by lightning that came from the Red Star! And it made us into Toa! And it was awesome!

 

Hewkii, local athlete and part-time jazz musician

Hewkii: I looked like lightning hit me. I mean, who ever heard of a Toa of Stone who wasn’t at least some shade of brown?

 

Jaller: Awesome!

 

Hydraxon: Upon the recreation of Spherus Magna, new light was shed onto this mystery by some of the helpful Agori.

 

Tarduk, Indiana Jones idolizer

Tarduk: I went on this incredible journey to find out about the Red Star. You know, ‘cause I can see it dimly in the sky? I found this dusty old map outside of the arena and it looked like something having to do with that Red Star thing. Like it was some sort of… factory. Whoa. I never knew stars were made in factories. It like, blew my mind. It also made me question my own existence? Are like, we all made in factories? What does it mean to be alive? And can we all just get along?

 

Crotesius, vehicle rider and guy with an impossible name to spell

Crotesius: Tarduk dragged me and another Agori named Kirbold along his field trip. It didn’t really go all that well. First off, we got attacked by Iron wolves. Not fun at all. Granted, we met some crazy wizard who held them off, but still, you know? After we met some guys who could control the elements, I got outta there as fast as I could, no questions asked.

 

Kirbold, not to be confused with the guys who ride the Kaxium

Kirbold: Crotesius was out of there faster than you could shout his name… which is saying something. After we met these weird elemental guys, we eventually got lost in this weird place and then ended up back to where we started… meaning our whole adventure was completely pointless.

 

Hydraxon: Is there more to the Red Star than meets the eye? Many reports have been made and a lot of have been dismissed due to lack of evidence, and yet there are those who still believe. Could this star be a supernatural phenomenon or an elaborate hoax? If you or anyone may have information, please call us. Coming up next, we look at an encounter with some bizarre creatures known as Zyglak. Then the disappearance of a wicked Southern Belle shrouded in mystery. Later, an update on the murder of Karzahni, as well as another murder and a disappearance linked to it. That’s all coming up next.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jaller: Awesome!


Edited by ShadowBionics, Feb 16 2013 - 09:27 PM.

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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#7 Offline Dapper-Sama

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Posted Feb 11 2013 - 02:00 PM

Another hilarious chapter. The character descriptions multiply your Funny Index by 3. Jolly Good Job!


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#8 Offline Disciple

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Posted Feb 17 2013 - 02:06 AM

Good laughs from the second chapter. Any particular reason Jaller kept saying "Awesome!" so much? :P

 

And I, for one, do remember Nixie! I like how you made her such a book nerd.

 

Hope chapter three comes out soon.


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#9 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Feb 22 2013 - 12:00 AM

Glad you liked all liked the chapter. No particular reason why Jaller kept saying "Awesome!" every so often, I just thought it'd be random and funny. I'm glad someone else remembers Nixie. For random reasons when I was younger, I paired her with Takua... I was younger, don't look at me. Look at the younger me! It's him you want!

 

Anyway, here is the third chapter, probably one of the lengthiest ones as of now since there was so much stuff I wanted to cover. Well, here you go.

 

 

 

Hydraxon: Many know about the objects known as Krana, but what really goes into the process of their creation? More so, what happens when this process goes terribly wrong? Tonight, we look at some of these mistakes known only as “Zyglak.” I’m your host Hydraxon, and I enjoy eating pizza in my spare time. Join me, and you might be able to help me solve a mystery.

 

*insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

 

Hydraxon: Over a millennia has passed since the Great Beings mysteriously vanished and left us with their wisdom. While that is a story for another day, we look into one of the mysteries they left behind for us. As part of a massive experiment, the Great Beings used some raw material and exposed it to Energized Protodermis. Upon doing so, the material would become the leech-like creatures known only as Krana. However, things didn’t always go right, and at times the experiment resulted in the creation of savage beings known as Zyglak.

 

Toa Orde, Guy with a lot of issues

Orde: Yeah, so it was up to me to go and calm ‘em down, right? See, thing is I don’t do no babysitting for a bunch of pointy-faced freaks. I got a real bad temper, you see? So I don’t like doing stuff like that. It gets on my nerves. And apparently that’s why all Toa of Psionics are all female… I don’t get that. Man, I’m tired of being an outcast!

 

Hydraxon: Because of the nature or their origin, the Zyglak grew to hate all of Matoran kind, as well as the Great Beings and anything associated with them.

 

Velika, whimsical rhyming genius/nutjob

Velika: Listen here to the words I say. Upon seeing the Zyglak, you must stay away. In strange ways, they commune… all about how to bring us our doom! Beware!

 

Hydraxon: Around the time the first team of Toa was instated, disaster struck. Upon going about a routine mission, the team met a wandering tribe of Zyglak, who went out to slaughter the Toa… all except for one Toa Lesovikk.

 

Sarda, Toa Lesovikk fanboy

Sarda: It wasn’t his fault the Zyglak killed them! He just hesitated and didn’t know what to do. Please, he’s a good person inside. He’s just got issues!

 

Hydraxon: It was this incident that would lead to Lesovikk’s downfall and spiral to villainous deeds and his questioning of the the title of “Toa.” This wouldn’t be the last time anyone would hear of the Zyglak. Many years later, after the Great Cataclysm, another tribe of Zyglak would be encountered by none other than the Toa Inika, shortly before their transformations into the Toa Mahri. We managed to get interviews with these Toa, including an interview with Toa Matoro before his untimely passing.

 

Jaller, bossy guy and self-proclaimed hero

Jaller: We needed to go down through this place called “The Cord” beneath Voya Nui. You know, because Matoro lost the Mask of Life.

 

Matoro, reluctant hero

Matoro: Jaller blames me for losing the Mask of Life, but it wasn’t my fault. The mask chose me to be its destined wearer, and it just wasn’t time or place for me to use it yet. So we went through the Cord to go beneath the waters of Voya Nui.

 

Hahli, not Lesovikk

Hahli: Matoro’s been through a lot. I worry about him, you know. Don’t tell Jaller I said that. Anyway, while that was all going on, we ran into Vezon.

 

Kongu, meticulous

Kongu: What was Vezon doing there, anyway? Wasn’t he stop-frozen in time or something?

 

Hewkii, athlete and part-time jazz musician

Hewkii: Vezon came around and he just flat out challenges us to a rematch. Too bad he was kind of powerless without the Mask of Life on him.

 

Nuparu, an inventor

Nuparu: He slammed Matoro’s head into a wall! It got intense!

 

Vezon, no description needed

Vezon: I wasn’t too happy when I found out the mask wanted to abandon me for Matoro. No… just didn’t settle with me. So after I got to my feet, I said good-bye to my friend Kardas after we agreed we had separate paths to follow. So to make my point, I slammed Matoro into a wall. I mean, I needed to get their attention somehow, right?

 

Jaller: But while that was happening, we ran into some Zyglak. And it wasn’t awesome!

 

Hahli: They told us a little bit about themselves. They weren’t happy to see us.

 

Nuparu: So we held them off as best as we could.

 

Hewkii: Eventually, we drove them off. I bet they didn’t like that too much.

 

Kongu: And then as if it wasn’t weird enough, they Zyglak just snatch-grab Vezon and run off!

 

Matoro: Personally, I was okay with seeing Vezon go. My head still hurts from when he hurt me… They took him away and ran and we never saw them again… until we went back up and saw the Piraka killed them all.

 

Vezon: At first, I was scared out of my mind! I didn’t know what they were going to do! Turns out they just really liked me and wanted me around. They even put me into a hot tub and made me their king! At least… until I found out it was a pot. And they were just really hungry. They all left to get some ingredients and never came back. I didn’t think  I was that bad company.

 

Hydraxon: At a later date, Vezon himself was recruited into a rag-tag team of misfits who went on a mission to find and free Makuta Miserix. During this mission the rogue Makuta Spiriah took it on himself to cause a mutiny and enlisted the help of the Zyglak.

 

Vezon: Take it from me… don’t make deals with Zyglak. They aren’t good. When Mr. “I think I’m so handsome” tried to cause a mutiny, it wasn’t a happy time for me. Oh, and I guess it wasn’t for everyone else either. I think Roodaka was the most angry.

 

Hydraxon: Numerous other encounters have been noted within the Pit. However, upon the evacuation to Spherus Magna, there have been no such sightings of the Zyglak. Are they so bitter, they would rather remain away from Matoran society, or are they still out there in places we cannot find them? If you or anyone you know has any information, please contact us. Coming up next, we take a look at the life and times of a Toa of Water who went wrong, as well as her disappearance. Then, an update on the murder of Karzahni, as well as a second murder and the mysterious disappearance of two witnesses. All this and more coming up next.


Edited by ShadowBionics, Feb 22 2013 - 12:05 AM.

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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#10 Offline Disciple

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Posted Feb 26 2013 - 12:04 PM

I liked how Chapter Three explored some of the unused ideas from the Mahri Nui story arc. Always wanted to see that scene where Vezon slams Matoro's head into the wall (I even made this animation back in 2007 :P). The lines you gave Vezon are spot-on. The portrayal of Sarda as a Lesovikk fanboy made me laugh too.

 

Do I sense a chapter on Tuyet coming up? This viewer is staying tuned.


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#11 Offline Watcher on the Walls

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Posted Feb 27 2013 - 11:03 PM

This is really funny. I mean: Vezon, no description needed. I don't even want to find out what it is.
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#12 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Mar 10 2013 - 01:40 AM

I liked how Chapter Three explored some of the unused ideas from the Mahri Nui story arc. Always wanted to see that scene where Vezon slams Matoro's head into the wall (I even made this animation back in 2007 :P). The lines you gave Vezon are spot-on. The portrayal of Sarda as a Lesovikk fanboy made me laugh too.

 

Do I sense a chapter on Tuyet coming up? This viewer is staying tuned.

A lot of these still leave me puzzled to this day. Granted, I know we got information from Greg and the encyclopedia I never bought, ,but still. I wish we did get a BL#7: Invasion to go into it better. 

I've been practicing my portrayal of Vezon for a long time, and even studying movies and looking through the old Bionicle story material for inspiration. 

And yes, there will be one of two Tuyet chapters coming up after I finish replying.

 

This is really funny. I mean: Vezon, no description needed. I don't even want to find out what it is.

Well, what can you say about Vezon? He's got his own mode of thinking and his own style. Words can't really describe that, so I didn't use words.

 

 

Here is episode 4. Like the Karzahni case, this one is going to be more than one episode, so there will be another one sometime down the line. Here we go.

 

 

Hydraxon: It was a dark time in the city of Metru Nui when a string of murders were reported and investigated by Toa Lhikan and Toa Nidhiki. Tonight, we take a look at the perpetrator of this string of murders, Toa Tuyet. I’m your host Hydraxon, and I dislike math. Join me, and you might be able to help me solve a mystery.

 

*insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

 

Hydraxon: It all began on the eve of a summer night, when Toa Lhikan and a group of Matoran gathered around the body of the deceased… We were lucky to get interviews with both Lhikan and Nidhiki before their untimely deaths at the hands of an obese madman.

 

Lhikan, voted world’s best hero ever

Lhikan: There was no doubt something was up, but I just couldn’t understand it. There were safeguards to prevent this kind of thing, you know? I didn’t want to think it was murder, but there was no other explanation. Nidhiki, as “charming” as he is, didn’t hold back when he told me his thoughts.

 

Nidhiki, hates creepy crawlies

Nidhiki: “It’s murder, Lhikan. Deal with it.” That’s what I told him when he was there all panicking and talking with Turaga Dume about it. Frankly, Turaga Dume isn’t that much help. I mean, have you seen him lately?

 

Dume, hasn’t been institutionalized

Dume: I wasn’t paying attention at the time because I needed to worry about something more important: Zombies. I know this is an explosive issue, but you all need to understand that the heat of the moon causes the dead to rise… or is it the Red Star? Or is it the bagel?

 

Nidhiki: Anyways, as we kept looking, some of those annoying Vahki with their stupid-looking heads veered our way and I told them to back off. They’re just cold, unloving machines anyway. Like they know what it’s like to be alive? I don’t think so.

 

Lhikan: As I looked closer, I noticed there was some writing on a tablet, and it said “Toa Tuyet.”  So I went and questioned her.

 

Hydraxon: Upon questioning, Toa Tuyet denied knowing any Ta-Matoran, let alone having interaction with them. She claimed to have been in Ga-Metru and not having left for days.

 

Toa Nokama, brainy bookworm

Nokama: Tuyet helped me out with some stuff in the lab. I couldn’t get much help, and Vhisola was too busy staring at me all weird to really help me. It was… disturbing.

 

Vhisola, Nokama worshipper

Vhisola: She is my hero! Is it my problem that I worship the ground she walks on?? I even have a life-sized poster of her, which is my most prized possession. None of you can have it! None of you! *maniacal laughter*

 

Lhikan: Since the other Toa were gone, it was just us three there left to protect the city. I won’t lie, but I was scared out of my wits.

 

Nidhiki: So that’s when I figured it was up to me to knock some sense into him. Not literally, of course, or else he’d have gotten mad at me or whatever. I reminded him about the tablet…

 

Hydraxon: It wasn’t long before another murder took place, which was reported by Kongu after he stumbled on a deceased Le-Matoran who fell to his demise. There was another notable clue with him: another stone tablet bearing the name “Toa Tuyet.”

 

Lhikan: We split up to go after Tuyet. I personally went to Ga-Metru to see her home quarters, and there she was, waiting for me.

 

Hydraxon: Security camera in the paranoid Tuyet’s home caught sight of some of the confrontation. However, upon intensifying, the cameras were knocked offline.

 

Tuyet’s Security Camera 12

 

Tuyet (Southern Accent): I’ve been waitin’ for you, sugar.

 

Lhikan: There's been another death. Tuyet, I know you don't like Nidhiki, so I told him to go fly a kite. You and I have been friends for thousands of years. We've traveled together, fought together, worked at Burger King together, and once almost died together. If you know something about what's going on, you have to tell me.

 

Tuyet: Oh, whatever do you mean, Lhikan? If I did know something, then I’d be puttin’ you in danger, sugar. And could you imagine what’d happen to ‘lil old me?

 

End of tape

 

Hydraxon: Unfortunately, Tuyet cut the recording before anything else could transpire. However, thanks to the testimony of the Toa, we have been able to make connections.

 

Lhikan: After I let my guard down and told Tuyet one of my innermost personal secrets, Tuyet told me about something called the Nui Stone the Dark Hunters were after.

 

Nidhiki: I knocked some heads with them before Lhikan arrived. It was kind of fun.

 

Lhikan: After I got there, I spoke with Nidhiki, and yet I felt like we weren’t getting anywhere. None of those numbskulls seemed to know anything either. That’s when it hit me like a ton of bricks. And trust me, I know what it feels like.

 

Nidhiki: Is he talking about the time I dropped a ton of bricks on him for April Fools’ day? Well, it doesn’t matter. After we got rid of them, we went back, only to find yet another murder took place only a few minutes prior. Lhikan, being the goody-two-shoes he is, almost argued the logic with it, but I made him hush up. Personally, I thought Miss Southern Belle over there was hiding something, and I was determined to figure out what it was.

 

Hydraxon: Upon the capturing of the Dark Hunters, Lhikan and Tuyet went back into her dwelling, where Lhikan exposed her secret of the Nui Stone. Based on the testimony of the Toa, our team of unpaid interns have re-enacted the conflict.

 

Conflict with Tuyet Re-enactment

 

“Tuyet” (bad Southern accent): Oh, sugar, the countdown is over! Now we can go live happily ever after together, just you and me!

 

“Lhikan”: I do not love you, Tuyet, for I know your secret! *he reaches behind a curtain and pulls out a red marble.*

 

“Tuyet”: Dearest, whatever might that be?

 

“Lhikan”: This is the Nui Stone, is it not?

 

“Tuyet”: Okay, you caught me! I got the Nui Stone, sugar, and I’m going to rule the world.

 

“Lhikan”: I can’t let you do that, Tuyet!

 

*Suddenly, the door opens and out comes “Nidhiki” all happy and cheerful.*

 

“Nidhiki”: Honey, I’m home. *Laughs like Desi Arnaz*

 

*Laugh track/ applause track*

 

*While “Tuyet” is distracted, “Lhikan” takes the marble and steps on it, crushing it.*

 

“Lhikan”: You’re under arrest, Tuyet.

 

“Tuyet”: But I love you, Lhikan.

 

“Lhikan”: I never loved you. I like the more loyal, bookish type. Like Naho.

 

End of Re-enactment

 

Hydraxon: After the conflict, the friendship of Lhikan and Nidhiki grew somewhat sour, as Nidhiki was more than upset over the destruction of the Nui Stone. That night, Tuyet was confined in the Coliseum, but she would not remain there for long. There were reports of a large creature breaking in like a jolly prowler, taking Tuyet and leaving gifts, like some boxes of CDs by some blonde singer woman I am unfamiliar with.

 

Botar, never does interviews except for this one time

Botar: My job is my life. Without my job, I would have no life. Without my life, I would have no job. It was my duty to take the wrong-doer into custody and drop her off at the Pit to serve out her sentence. No questions asked. To keep others from catching on, I left some CDs by someone who sounds a lot like Tuyet. Her name is something like Britney Spears. They were gifts from my cousin who’s had his eye on my job for the last 14,000 years. I didn’t want them, so I figured it would be retribution for doing my job.

 

Hydraxon: But was this the last of Toa Tuyet, or would she return in some shape or form to haunt everyone who wronged her? Later on, it was reported that she attempted to escape from the Pit when the Great Cataclysm took place... Her current status is unknown. Toa Tuyet is seven feet tall with blue armor. She was last seen sporting a barbed broadsword and a mask of intangibility. If you have seen her or have any information on her, please contact us. Coming up next, an update on the murder of Karzahni, as well as two linked accounts of disappearances and a second murder. Later, we look into the downfall of Makuta Miserix. All this and more coming up next.


Edited by ShadowBionics, Mar 11 2013 - 12:48 AM.

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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#13 Offline Dapper-Sama

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Posted Mar 10 2013 - 11:00 PM

[color=rgb(40,40,40);font-family:helvetica, arial, sans-serif;] I even have a life-sized poster of her, which is my most prized possession. None of you can have it! None of you! *maniacal laughter*[/color]

Need I say anything? This is comedy at it's finest. *takes out notebook and pencil*


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Look at me, much gamer, so PlayStation, very achieve


#14 Offline Disciple

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Posted Mar 11 2013 - 10:51 PM

You and I have been friends for thousands of years. We've traveled together, fought together, worked at Burger King together, and once almost died together.

 

Best. Line. :lol:

 

I also like that Lhikan was voted "world's best hero, ever." To me, he is still the most legendary Toa, so I liked that bit. You gave Nidhiki a pretty interesting sense of humor too. Toa of Air are usually pranksters, and I like the idea of him messing with Lhikan. The part with the bricks made me think of Looney Tunes, BIONICLE-style. Tuyet's Southern drawl was a nice touch, and I liked the reference to Naho. By the way, Lhikan and I apparently share the same taste in women. :P

 

Ending it with Botar's speech about Britney Spears was a terrifically random way to wrap up episode four. I'm curious to see what the update on Karzahni will be like, since the serials didn't get that far.

 

Thanks for writing these. :)


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#15 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Apr 18 2013 - 12:31 AM

That part with the poster was one of my favorite parts. I remember reading somewhere Vhisola actually had a poster of Nokama. O_O I just played with that.

 

Well, Disciple, glad to hear you liked it. I thought it'd be fun to show a lighter side of Nidhiki. And I'm kind of the same way. Ironically, one of my Bionicle fan characters is a shy, reserved librarian girl. She (her name is Elitha), Nixie, and Naho could be study friends. Well, you won't have to wait for the update any longer. Although, Karzahni won't really be the main focus of the episode, ironically. He's still mentioned in there, but... you know what, let's just get on with the new episode. Sorry for the wait.

 

 

 

Hydraxon: In the eve of one cold night, there had been reports of various deaths that all had something in common. Tonight we investigate those deaths and try to uncover these mysterious motivations behind them. I’m your host, Hydraxon, and I am not dead. Join me, and you might be able to help me solve a mystery.

 

*insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

 

Hydraxon: The following information was provided to us by an anonymous tip. Upon the murder of Karzahni, another murder had been reported. It had been the murder of the original ruler of the Matoran Universe, the insanely hideous Tren Krom.

 

Mutran, insane pointy-headed lab geek

Mutran: The mere sight of him drove me insane. There was nothing I could do.

 

Kopaka, strategic specialist and loser in love

Kopaka: He was literally shattered into pieces when Pohatu and I found him. The murderer left practically nothing. I don’t even know if it was Lesovikk at this point anymore.

 

Pohatu, weapon specialist, napkin collector, local athlete

Pohatu: If it was Lesovikk, he would have needed something with a lot of fire power to not only one-shot kill Tren Krom, but shatter him into absolutely nothing.

 

Kopaka: But before we even found the remains, something hit us. It was like a mental picture. Or like a scream…

 

Pohatu: It still doesn’t make sense to me, no matter how much I look at it. I mean, it was this… big red thing.

 

Hydraxon: Unfortunately, we were unable to speak any further with our two correspondents, as no sooner did they finish their interview, they were spirited away by some unknown being who looked like a walking garbage heap. There are several eyewitness sketches on what this creature looks like.

 

*The screen then cuts to pictures of Trinuma, then Spiriah, then THE MIGHTY TUMA!!!, and then Christopher Walken.*

 

Hydraxon: The question is now a matter of who is behind the kidnapping, and what are their motives for doing so? It has also now become questionable as to who could be the real murderer who took down Karzahni and Tren Krom, as well as who are the next possible victims?

 

Toa Helryx, Order of Mata Nui Leader

Helryx: If you ask me, the murderer is obviously a deviant. They are most likely trying to either prove some warped point, or they point blank want to get rid of any powerful being who could stand in their way of domination and rule. That’s just me. I could be wrong.

 

Makuta Miserix, last survivor of Makuta race and total nutjob

Miserix: You wanna know how I got to look like this? Well, you see, I worked as a cashier at this little shop on the corner in my younger years. My boss always told me if I kept my head up, I might be someone someday. Well, one afternoon, this cute young girl walked in. She told me I had a great smile. She and I got to know each other for a little bit. But then… this insane robber guy walks in. He scares her, and I didn’t like that. So I tell him off, but know what he does? He orders me to give him all the money and he throws he into the back of the store. That… didn’t settle well with me. So I just…

 

*he puts his hands on his head, and moves it up to symbolize his increase in height. He then makes a jaw with his hands to symbolize his transformation into a giant reptile.*

 

Miserix: So then I hate him! And then I ate my boss because he came in and tried to hit me with a shovel. I looked over to the girl… she’s scared to death of me! She runs out, screaming and telling me to stay away from her! And now… now I’m always smiling.

 

Vezon, no description needed

Vezon: Really? Well, it’s about time someone realized how great I am! I mean, it only took you guys long enough. Wow, so you consider me a powerful being. You know, no one really cared about who I was until I put on a mask. And then they didn’t care about me until I put on another mask. Well, better late than never, I guess. Whoever this murderer guy is, I wanna meet him. I’ll be sure to give him a nice, big hug when I do!

 

Axonn, not Hydraxon’s Brother

Axonn, foreign accent: I say bring on the little baby man! I will personally take him down myself! And justice!

 

Brutaka, should be on probation

Brutaka: Sparklies!!! The Sparklies are everywhere! Mata Nui is just a giant robot! Makuta’s real name is Teridax!

 

Toa Tuyet? Wait, why isn’t she dead?

Tuyet: Hey, y’all. It’s mighty sweet of you to say I’m a powerful being. Lhikan and Nidhiki never saw it that way. I’m kinda sad to hear they’re both dead. I really did want to see them again. That way I could get back at Lhikan for tearin’ out my heart! How dare he treat me after I gave him the best years of my life! But that’s all done and gone. Well, whoever this bandit is, I only hope he knows who he’s messin’ with. ‘Cause this time, I ain’t messin’ around.

 

Hydraxon: After talking with possible candidates for victims, we asked around about anyone who might have known about Karzahni. We spoke to Makuta Mutran before his untimely demise and have preserved part of his interview when he contacted us about reporting something strange.

 

Mutran

Mutran: I saw the universe. I discovered the secrets. Our fearless leader was nothing compared to this guy. He probed my mind. He shared his wisdom with me. And then he threw me into a dumpster. So I told Teridax exactly what I learned. I never saw Tren Krom again.

 

Gali, healing expert

Gali: I have only heard whispers and rumors about him, but I’ve never actually seen him. You know, we sent Lewa out to find him, but he has yet to actually return to us… I personally thought he was a mysterious mythological creature wrapped in an enigma.

 

Tahu, fire expert

Tahu: A what?

 

Gali: How about “it’s fake?”

 

Turaga Matau, crazy old coot who’s supposed to be wise about stuff

Turaga Matau: It reminds me of the time I was interviewed on Unsolved Mysteries

 

Turaga Vakam, wise elderly figure type

Turaga Vakama: Contrary to popular belief, Tren Krom is in fact real. One more thing. The mere sight of him will drive you insane beyond repair. So I highly advise to never look at him directly, unless you wish to throw away your mind and sanity.

 

Velika, whimsical rhyming genius/nutjob

Velika: I didn’t kill them! I, uh… I mean… hey, kids, who wants to follow me to the creepy statue?

 

Hydraxon: What could this red object be in the vision shared by Pohatu and Kopaka? Who or what is this mysterious being who spirited them away? Are we alone in the universe? Who is the real killer of Karzahni and Tren Krom? So many questions with answers we know so little about. If you or anyone has anything to report, please contact us. Coming up next, the tragic downfall of Makuta Miserix. How did it happen and who was in the coup that brought him down? Later, the return of a fugitive Toa thought to have been long gone. All that and more coming up next.

 

 


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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#16 Offline Toa of Gallifrey

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Posted Apr 22 2013 - 06:36 PM

Very awesome comedy! Every single line is memorable. I especially loved the bit with Vhisola. It's a shame Vhisola's obsession for Nokama was never touched after the Metru animations.


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"Now what will come out of this? A new mask of power? Some tooth-claw creature? A Matoran marching band?" - Toa Lewa, Endgame

"I demand to be incarcerated in the Tower of London with my co-conspirators: sand shoes and granddad." - 11th Doctor, The Day of the Doctor

"Looks like Team Rocket's signing off again!" - Jessie, James and Meowth, Mewtwo Strikes Back


#17 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Jul 28 2013 - 12:46 AM

Hydraxon: No one ever saw it coming, nor did they know what would transpire afterwards. It happened so suddenly, and yet there were the tell-tale signs that foretold these events. Tonight we look into the tragic downfall of the leader of the Brotherhood of Makuta known as Makuta Miserix. I’m your host Hydraxon, and it’s just a rumor. Join me, and you might help me solve a mystery.

 

*insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

 

Hydraxon: The following information was provided to us through interviews provided to us by the Makuta of the Brotherhood before their untimely deaths. It all happened so long ago that some details were hazy within the memories of our interviewees.

 

Mutran, insane pointy-headed lab geek

Mutran: There’s nothing I can do.

 

Spiriah, narcissistic freak

Spiriah: Miserix was not very effective in running the Brotherhood, to be honest. About the only thing he did right was allow me enough time to admire me and everything good about me. He understood that. But when it came to anything else… he was lost. He also did a lot of yelling. And story telling.

 

Archived Footage

 

Miserix: You wanna know… why I look like this?

 

Icarax: No! Stop! Anything but that! No!

 

Miserix: Well, you see, my mother and I had jobs at the circus, you see. I would pick up and feed the animal acts. The ring leader was nice enough to give us jobs. The ring leader had a very nice daughter. She always told me she thought I had a nice smile…

 

end of footage

 

Hydraxon: Members complained that Miserix was ineffective as a leader and a few of them even thought of overthrowing him. Unfortunately, not many of them ever prevailed. All except for one…

 

Antroz, always being set on fire

Antroz: The Brotherhood got into real hot water after that whole civil war in Metru Nui broke out. Ironically, that was when one of our ranks became a war hero. He was a trusted lieutenant to Miserix. His name was Teridax. He had a lot on his mind and plans he wished could go through.

 

Chirox, pointy-headed lab geek and judger

Chirox: So after Teridax becomes a war hero, Miserix gets this “brilliant” idea that we should all watch over some assigned area. Teridax of course got Metru Nui… lucky… the rest of us got areas no one cares about. Except Kojol and Icarax, they got big heads after landing Artakha and Karzahni respectively. And it was so convenient that Miserix “forgot” to assign himself an area to watch over. His reason was that he wanted to run the Brotherhood from Destral. Oh, come on, do you expect me to believe that?

 

Gorast, love-crazed evil woman

Gorast: Teridax was so ambitious, something a girl just can’t ignore. His personality was so electrifying and charismatic, you couldn’t help but want to hear more and more from him. Oh, how I could just listen to him all day talking about anything. I don’t care what he talks about, I just wish I could hear his voice one more time. *forlorn sigh*

 

Hydraxon: Um… There was eventually a split between certain members in the Brotherhood, much to the ignorance of Miserix. It was then that Teridax called a Convocation on Destral.

 

Bitil, voted most like Eeyore

Bitil: No one ever called a Convocation before. No one aside from Miserix. It’s not difficult to imagine how angry he was. It’s also not difficult to imagine he would give us another one of his stories. I hate his stories. They all end the same way.

 

Krika, desperately needs to be institutionalized

Krika: For thousands of generations, the Brotherhood of Makuta was the protector of peace and justice under the leadership of Makuta Miserix throughout the universe. Before the dark time. Before the Plan. A young Makuta called Lord Teridax hunted down and destroyed all those who opposed him. Teridax was seduced by the dark side of the force…

 

Hydraxon: Upon calling the convocation, Teridax was met with Miserix’s wrath, and a short battle followed afterwards, ultimately ending in a stalemate. 

 

Kojol, master of sarcasm

Kojol: In one corner we had Miserix the Mammoth Mouth, and in the other we had the living tub of lard himself Teridax. I would be lying if I said I was not excited to watch the fight. My money was riding on Miserix, though. He might be kinda dumb, but at least he’s not all fat and slow like Teridax. I mean, have you ever seen how he walks? And when he takes a step, it sounds like a machine. I’m surprised he never had tail lights installed on him.

 

Vamprah, watch out for the quiet ones

Vamprah: …

 

Mutran

Mutran: It didn’t help that I shared with Teridax the knowledge Tren Krom shared with me. It really went to his head. There was nothing I could do.

 

Hydraxon: Some sided with Teridax and other sided with Miserix. And some had to keep their mouths shut in order to survive.

 

Icarax, total moron

Icarax: I may have only up to a fifth grade education, but I know when to shut up. He became the boss. And if the boss knew you went against him, you were out. And I mean OUT. He actually made me and Gorast take care of a lot of the twerps who didn’t agree with him. Personally, I hated his plans and junk, but I wanted to stay alive, so I just went with it until I knew the time would come when I could just rush in and take over. It was only a matter of time.

 

Gorast

Gorast: Kurse all SeeDs!

 

Tridax, stereotypical redneck/scientist

Tridax: Of course I hated Miserix. He never let things get done around here. I need to get things done, you know. I have to do all kinds of science-y stuff!

 

Spiriah

Spiriah: Unfortunately it wasn’t long before some of us had other interests. I wanted to go and experiment on these brutish creatures called Skakdi to make them more fabulous. I only ended up making them even more unfabulous than when I started off… they didn’t want me back.

 

Icarax

Icarax: It was kind of funny when Kojol got murdered. I mean, his armor was eaten up and his essence destroyed?? How unlucky can you get?? If I didn’t know any better, I’d think someone was out to get him. Well, at least I’m still alive and in one piece, and that’s something Kojol can’t take away from me.

 

Bitil

Bitil: After Miserix was disposed of, Teridax made Krika do the dirty work of killing him. He came back after a few days. If I cared, I’d have asked him why it took him so long.

 

Krika

Krika: Here comes me!

 

*Krika gets off from his stool, pushes over the cameraman, and makes a run for the door. In hot pursuit of Krika, the crew follows him where Krika runs into Gorast…*

 

Gorast: What are you doing here?!

 

Krika: Don’t worry, Miss! I’ll save you from this burning building!

 

Gorast: Can someone get him under control? I don’t want my Unsolved Mysteries interview to look bad.

 

Krika: I must give her mouth-to-mouth resuperfication!

 

*Krika takes Gorast and starts making out with her.*

 

Icarax: What are you doing?

 

Krika: I think your boyfriend is onto us.

 

Gorast: Get off me!!!

 

Hydraxon: It was later told by Krika after he calmed down that he refused to kill Makuta Miserix and instead imprisoned him on an island where nobody goes. It was there that Miserix would live out the rest of his life to go insane and go through an evolutionary process that forced him to continuously absorb mass.

 

Antroz

Antroz: Teridax had no problem taking over, really. He was kind of annoyed hat having to move out a lot of Miserix’s stuff from the leader suite. He was especially annoyed when he found Miserix’s notebooks filled with fanart of a cute yellow winged creature called a Fluttershy. What’s a Fluttershy?

 

Hydraxon: Uh… Um… Was this really the last anyone would hear of Makuta Miserix? Or would this all come back later on to haunt the Brotherhood? Coming up next, a Toa of Water thought to be long gone suddenly seen alive again. Later, a mysterious coincidence or an intentional murder? All this and more coming up next.


Edited by ShadowBionics, Jul 26 2014 - 01:12 AM.

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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#18 Offline Disciple

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Posted Jul 29 2013 - 11:32 AM

It returns! :lol:

 

The list of Gaardus lookalikes had me cracking up. Were you by any chance imagining Arnold Schwarzenegger for Axonn's voice? 'Cause it totally makes sense. Also funny how we see Velika so briefly at the end, even though he's been the real murderer all along.

 

I like the shift to focus on Miserix and his downfall, since I always found that a cool part of the story. Being a Joker wannabe probably doesn't make the guy too popular among his fellow Makuta. And you know, Bitil makes a pretty good Eeyore. I guess it works, since he never had much going for him in the story.

 

Looking forward to more of these unsolved mysteries...


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#19 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Aug 04 2013 - 05:44 AM

It returns! :lol:

 

The list of Gaardus lookalikes had me cracking up. Were you by any chance imagining Arnold Schwarzenegger for Axonn's voice? 'Cause it totally makes sense. Also funny how we see Velika so briefly at the end, even though he's been the real murderer all along.

 

I like the shift to focus on Miserix and his downfall, since I always found that a cool part of the story. Being a Joker wannabe probably doesn't make the guy too popular among his fellow Makuta. And you know, Bitil makes a pretty good Eeyore. I guess it works, since he never had much going for him in the story.

 

Looking forward to more of these unsolved mysteries...

Yeah, I was kind of going off of other members' reactions to Spiriah and Trinuma from the old forums. Like how one of them asked "Where's Spiriah? Is he behind that jumble of pieces?" was inspiration for both this and for Spiriah in general. And yes, speaking of the old forums, Axonn was always Swartzenegger, everything he said and did was mostly based off him. 

 

I kind of wished they delved into that a little more, I thought it was a cool story point and I wished they'd expanded on it more, but alas it did not happen. And that's just how I make them, Miserix is a Joker wannabe and Bitil is depressed all the time. The downside of 2008 was the lack of character depth for the Makuta, they could have had such potential, but oh well. I'll do the character expanding here.

 

Well, here's another one then. This one I have been looking forward to writing for the longest time. As such, I think this one is now the longest one at this point in time.

 

 

 

Hydraxon: She vanished mysteriously in the coldest night anyone could remember without a trace. But was this really the last anyone would see of Toa Tuyet, or could she still have been out there? Tonight we continue looking into the case of the sadistic murderer known as Toa Tuyet. I’m your host Hydraxon and I hate shellfish. Join me, and you might be able to help me solve a mystery.

 

*insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

 

Hydraxon: Upon her apprehension, Toa Tuyet was imprisoned in the Coliseum of Metru Nui to await further trail. However, she was mysteriously spirited away by the being known as Botar to a prison where only the worst of the worst dwelled. I should know as I also serve as its jailer. However, very few knew exactly what happened to her and it remained a mystery to everyone.

 

Lhikan, voted world’s best hero ever

Lhikan: There was absolutely no chance of redemption for her. I eagerly awaited her fate. I was shocked when I was told she was gone and there was nothing but a bunch of CDs from some Britney Spears character left.

 

Nidhiki, REALLY hates creepy crawliesNidhiki: Honestly I don’t get why people hate on Britney Spears. Between you and me, I personally like her music and think she’s kinda cute… wait, this going on live isn’t it?? Stop filming me!!

 

Naho, shy little bookworm

Naho: Tuyet was always kind of pushy and mean at times. I actually question how she became a Toa. She didn’t really care about the Matoran, nor did she really do her job with enthusiasm as Lhikan and I did.

 

Archived Footage

 

Naho: Um, hello? Tuyet?

 

Tuyet: What is it, sugar?

 

Naho: The Vahki have reported a disturbance in the lower sector. I think we ought to scurry on over there.

 

Tuyet: Look, hun, I think you can handle it on your own just fine.

 

Naho: But, well, that’s not what I mean.

 

Tuyet, giggles: Stop worring so much there, darlin’ or else you’re gonna make yourself more tighter than a porcupine.

 

Naho: Ugh…

 

End Footage

 

Naho: It also made me uncomfortable whenever she referred to me as “sugar” or “darling” or anything of the sort, as if she was indicating we were close friends. Honestly, we were never that close. If anything, I wished I could get as far away from her as possible. 

 

Nidhiki, lover of Britney Spears

Nidhiki: Hey, don’t think I'm not aware of what you’re saying right now! Quit fooling around! As for Tuyet… I don’t know if she liked me or not for sure. I mean, she would always back me into a corner and look at me with a sly look in her eyes. She would also sometimes say things like, “Sugar, someday I’m gonna just kiss you without a sound.” But that doesn’t necessarily mean she has a thing for me, right?

 

Greg Farshtey, Writer of Bionicle lore, Ninjago, Hero Factory, and esteemed Lego employee

Greg: For the record I would like to make it very clear that romance in Bionicle is non-canon and not at all possible. So to say that Toa Tuyet had feelings for Toa Nidhiki would be false and not true to the actual Bionicle story.

 

Lhikan

Lhikan: I wasn’t sad to see her go. I honestly don’t know her anymore. If I ever see her again, it would be too soon.

 

Hydraxon: Shorty after being taken from Metru Nui, she was dropped into the prison known only as The Pit, where she was sentenced to spend the rest of her days… Although in a turn of events, it seems there is still more to this story. Upon further investigation, it was discovered Toa Tuyet wasn’t taken directly to The Pit.

 

Helryx, Leader of the Order of Mata Nui

Helryx: I gave Botar specific instructions to inform her exactly about what she had done and about the power she held. The Nui Stone is a very powerful and dangerous object, and that no good little Southern Belle had the nerve to try and take it for her own. Apparently when Toa Lhikan broke it, shards of it were embedded in her armor, and that just made her even more of a risk to keep around.

 

Botar, refuses to give interviews

Botar: …

 

Trinuma, crazed Viking Warrior

Trinuma: Personally, the whole thing was just absurd. I just wanted to do something funny with her voice box. But our leader wanted to have her studied. At the same time, though, we still needed to do something about what would happen if anyone knew she was missing.

 

Hydraxon: The Order wished to examine Tuyet and the shard embedded in her armor with the secret desire to possibly produce more. In order to do that, Tuyet had to be isolated away and no one outside the order could ever know. At that point, a Tuyet from an alternate universe was plucked out and placed in the main dimension’s Tuyet, even having false shards embedded in her armor. For the next 1,500 years, the real Tuyet would remain as a test subject in an alternate universe where there were no Toa, as to avoid making her even more of a risk factor. Meanwhile, the decoy would take her spot so no one would ever know she was missing.

 

Trinuma

Trinuma: Simply put: If everyone thought Tuyet was locked in The Pit, no one would question it. And then we could get our research done. She was guarded by our immovable guards either way.

 

Hydraxon: A statement that would later be proven false. What would happen to the decoy Tuyet was another question. While she was meant to stay put where she was, things did not go as planned. It was on that day a horrific event took place, one that I think that everyone knew where they were when it happened. I myself was in the Pit where many criminals took advantage of the chaos and escaped. Unfortunately, I was attacked from behind and fell unconscious for a very long time, thus having no further recollection of events.

 

Nocturn, not very bright

Nocturn: Nocturn saw Hydraxon die. Nocturn not sure why being interviews for stupid show hosted by Hydraxon. Nocturn also saw pretty lady escaping from cell, but Nocturn not sure what she doing. Nocturn hear sayings that she try to help Hydraxon. Nocturn thinks she stupid if that what she doing! Then also hear she escaping like rest of us. But poor pretty lady did not make it out alive. Nocturn thought she very pretty. Nocturn also thought pretty lady had voice like sweet butter on summer day.

 

Hydraxon: Uh…? Hmm… From then on it was assumed Tuyet was killed for good. Whatever the intentions of this decoy, whether it be escaping for her own nefarious deeds or to serve on the side of justice, we may never fully know. Sadly, this fallen Toa wouldn’t be able to have a final resting place.

 

Matoro, reluctant hero

Matoro: I honestly hate this mask power. Know what it does? It reanimates the dead. When Makuta was trying to take me under his wing, he wanted me to bring back Toa Tuyet so he would use the Staff of Artakha to fix the Nui Stone. He got it from this really big moron who was wearing Makuta’s mask. Not sure how Makuta felt about it. The fun didn’t stop there, however. Oh, no, it got worse. It turned out Karzahni followed us there, and he also brought along his little helper elves and some lunk who had a mask like Hahli. Makuta got into a huge fight with Karzahni, and while it might sound like the match of the century, it wasn’t fun when I got involved. Upon getting attacked, I… kind of slipped up on the whole Zombie Tuyet thing. Karzahni then killed Zombie Tuyet. I wanted to get out of there, if I can be honest.

 

Takanuva, hero for hire

Takanuva: Like, I know it doesn’t really deal with the whole “main dimension” Tuyet, but I met an alternate version of her in another universe. I got sent around this dimensional voyage all because of that dumb head Brutaka, GOSH! I met this version of Tuyet who was still alive and ruled this empire with Nidhiki. She had Lhikan’s Hau displayed on a mantle like a trophy, GOSH! I mean, what is wrong with her?! I went into tell her off, but then she started seducing me and telling me I was cute and whatever. Then she put on Brutaka’s mask and said she was slipping into something more comfortable, but I thought it just made her look so stupid! She kept telling me she wanted me to be her king and we would rule forever. You know, at first I got annoyed by her accent and whatever, but then I figured she was kind of cute once you got past that. Unfortunately for her, I was already in the process of leaving, so like a total dumb head, she reached after me and begged me not to leave her. She got cut in half when the dimensional gate I opened closed on her. Why does this always happen to my love life? GOSH!

 

Tuyet, obvious Ranamon wannabe

Tuyet, evil giggle: I never really thought I would ever get out. But my patience paid off in the end. All I had to do was use my feminine charm on that guard, and just like almost every other guy I’ve met, he fell for me faster than an apple tree in a thunder storm! *squeals in delight* I mean, no one can resist the ‘lil cutie pie that is the one and only me!

 

Hydraxon: It was on that day Order of Mata Nui member Trinuma was forced to eat his words. The guard Tuyet had spoken to, now wanting nothing more than her approval, helped her escape.

 

Tuyet

Tuyet: All he had to do was fake and explosion, and I was outta there faster than a cute ‘lil ol’ jackrabbit. I almost wish I could have seen the expression on that other guard’s face. I don’t think I wanted to see the expression on the face of the first guard, as I promised him a date. Well, you win some, you lose some. He lost while I won! It was so fantastic! It took me a long time, but I finally made it back home. And let me tell you, that ol’ dump had seen better days! I’ll admit, it did bring me down to hear Lhikan and Nidhiki were killed by that rusty ol’ fat guy in the dirty mask… *squeals in disgust* I don’t miss Naho, though. The ‘lil darlin’ was just no fun!

 

Hydraxon: Tuyet questioned the inhabitants of Metru Nui as to the state of the universe following the hostile takeover orchestrated by Makuta Teridax. She then hatched a plan of her own for her own dastardly agenda.

 

Tuyet

Tuyet: I did not want to keep my adorin’ fans a-waitin’ for me. Lucky that all that time I was gone, the Nui Stone was fully recharged and ready to go! So my message for Makuta Teridax?

 

*Tuyet gets up, does some twirls, and makes a cute pose*

 

Tuyet: I’m comin’ for you, sugar!

 

Hydraxon: What exactly would Tuyet’s challenge to Teridax be? More importantly, how believable was her escape? All that and more later on. Next up, we take a look into the murder of Makuta Kojol, plus a small string of murders that followed. Coincidence or planned? Later, who is the being known only as Artakha? All that and more coming up next.


Edited by ShadowBionics, Jul 26 2014 - 01:20 AM.

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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#20 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Jul 26 2014 - 01:23 AM

Hydraxon: Throughout the Matoran universe, many beings were either vanishing or being murdered before anyone could bat an eye. Tonight we go deeper into these cases of elimination and analyze what could have been the reason behind them. I’m your host Hydraxon and I look extremely handsome in this trench coat. Join me, and you might be able to help my solve a mystery.


*insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence.*

Hydraxon: All throughout the universe, many were being killed or taken from their homes. The perpetrator or perpetrators behind these cases left no trace of their dirty work. This begged the question of who and why? One of these more well-known murders was the one of the ill-famed Makuta Kojol.

Mutran, pointy-headed lab geek
Mutran: Did I like Kojol? No. I hated that guy. He never did anything to help us. He was always throwing around sarcasm and insults. Don’t even get me started on the ruthless barrage of fat jokes me made towards our leader.

Archived footage

Teridax: Kojol, bring me my tools.

Kojol: You mean your knife and fork?

Teridax: Why you little--!

Kojol: Have you seen yourself? You’re just asking for it, you know.

Teridax: Wait until I get over there!

Kojol: Oh, good, then I’ll have a good 3 days to do whatever.

Teridax: That’s it! Why do I even keep you around?!

Kojol: I know where Artakha is, that’s why! You’d never find it without me! 

Teridax: When I get my hands on you--!

Kojol: Please don’t get too close! Or else I’ll forever be trapped in your gravitational pull!

Teridax: You are so dead!

*Teridax chases Kojol around, who is laughing with joy.*

end of footage

Hydraxon: At first glance, it was more than reasonable to assume Teridax wanted Kojol dead for many years of torment and insults. This was later denied by one of his flunkies that Teridax did not murder him and was nowhere near the scene of the crime.

Mutran
Mutran: Sure, Teridax wanted him dead, but he didn’t actually do it. Come on, that’s just crazy. He was right here with us the whole time. In fact, Gorast spent most of the day of Kojol’s death clamped onto Teridax’s left leg like a leech. If she were here for an interview, she would probably further testify to Teridax’s innocence.

Hydraxon: Exactly what happened that day and where did everything go wrong? Kojol was called into action on Xia on what seemed to be just a regular mission to request a rather harmful virus for special weaponry. Somewhere along the line, something happened. Upon going about his business on Xia he requested the virus, but it then escaped its containment and devoured his armor whole. As Makuta where merely a strange substance within armor, Kojol’s essence was left subject to incineration by the blazing inferno in the Xian foundry. 

Bitil, voted most like Eeyore
Bitil: Mutran and I never really trusted him. He had a big head. Both figuratively and literally. He thought he was such hot stuff because he knew where to find Artakha, and he kept to himself a lot. We relied heavily on him despite this, because he knew so much. He took it on himself to lead a raid on Artakha and stole the Mask of Light, which is probably the stupidest thing ever created in the history of forever.

Hydraxon: With a new lead on the case, it was from there a common link was discovered amongst the other victims who met with terrible fates. All of them knew the location of Artakha’s legendary island. None of them were with a certain alignment, as several members of the Order of Mata Nui were killed as well. This further begs the earlier question of who did it and why. Some members of the Order were hardly ever seen, so for them to be killed could only mean one thing: The murderer already knew who they were. Thusly, the murderer was in the Order already. A list of suspects was drawn up upon this new information and carefully reviewed.

*Hydraxon cuts over to the list of suspects, which was actually just pictures and names of Order members. This list included Brutaka, Trinuma, Johmak, Tobduk, the four-armed guy named Jed who no one cared about, some fan art of Hydraxon happily holding hands with Sailor Mercury, and some fan art of Hydraxon hugging Fluttershy. Hey, wait a minute!*

Hydraxon: -_-

*The now blushing Hydraxon takes the time to walk off camera, and no sooner than he does, there is some sounds of a fight going on. Any by fight, I mean someone was getting beat up and not putting up a fight at all. Hydraxon then walks back to where he was and adjusts his coat.*

Hydraxon: After further questioning amongst the VALID suspects… only one of them admitted to these heinous crimes.

Tobduk, hates anything that moves
Tobduk: Yeah, I killed Kojol. And I’d do it again! I’d do it as many times as I wanted to! If I could, I’d have cloned him. Then I’d kill all his clones! Then I’d laugh at their pain! After that, maybe I’d go watch Finding Nemo and laugh at the part where his mom dies! Any yeah, I killed off all those other guys, too. I personally didn’t like them anyway. I was more than happy to answer Artakha’s plea to kill off anyone who knew where his island was. I personally whipped up the virus that killed Kojol. I was more than happy to see my result worked as I wanted. Then I stole it back and I used it to kill that redneck scientist Tridax! It was almost like killing Kojol again! It was so much fun! 

Hydraxon: Upon admitting to his harmful lifestyle, Tobduk was apprehended and later imprisoned, finally putting these murders to rest. However, there are still some unsolved murders like those of Karzahni and Tren Krom that have yet to be resolved. But coming up next, who is the being known only as Artakha? Later, what was the fate of Turaga Dume during the time of the Great Shadow? All that and more coming up next.


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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#21 Offline RahkshiToa88

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Posted Jul 26 2014 - 01:01 PM

The Nocturn part cracked me up!


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If you use correct grammar in your posts (or try hard to), place this in your signature. Join Myst's campaign for correct grammar usage on BZPower!

:smilepohatunu: :smilelehvak:


#22 Offline ShadowBionics

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Posted Aug 01 2014 - 04:08 AM

Hydraxon: A man. A myth. A legend. Who is the being known simply as “Artakha?” Is he a mere figment of the imagination, or is he as real as any of us? So many questions left unanswered. Join us, and you might help us get to the bottom of it all. I’m Hydraxon, and this is Unsolved Mysteries.

*Insert “Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries” title sequence here.*

Hydraxon: Since the beginning of the time before time, there have been legends of two brothers, twin creations of the Great Beings. One was said to have ruled a land of paradise, and the other a land of condemnation. The latter was the insane tyrant, Karzahni. The other was a divine-like creator known simply as Artakha. Alive even before the Great Spirit, their names eventually faded into myth and legend.



Hahli, not Lesovikk
Hahli: Oh, they are real, all right. Anyone who says they aren’t obviously isn’t of the world or up to date on their history. Karzahni’s realm is an actual location just south of Metru Nui. I should know, considering my friends and I had to go through there.
 
Nixie, underrated character no one remembers
Nixie: Artakha’s realm exists, but the problem is there’s no one who knows where it is. Anyone who did is not alive anymore. There’ve been some written poems describing the land of Artakha, calling it a beautiful paradise and industrial wonder. How this is possible, is beyond me.
 
Turaga Whenua, historical scholar, PhD
Whenua: Artahka himself is considered to be the greatest creator of all time. I’ve heard some legends saying if someone were to just leave materials for a desired object at his doorstep and leave, then said someone could just go back the next day and whatever desired object would be there, completed.

Turaga Dume, hasn’t been institutionalized
Dume: Just like a Genie!!

Hydraxon: Just as Artakha’s realm is shrouded in mystery, the ruler himself is an even larger mystery. While there have been beings who have seen the location for themselves, there hasn’t been anyone who has seen Artakha in person.
 
Toa Helryx, Order of Mata Nui Leader
Helryx: The Order of Mata Nui has done business with him before, mainly after the Brotherhood of Makuta did a surprise raid and he wanted his island to essentially “vanish” from the memories of everyone. Tobduk was tasked to take down everyone would possibly knew the location of the place. I think he enjoyed the job too well. However, Artakha communicates telepathically, so to see his face is unspeakable. 
 
Brutaka, should be on probation
Brutaka: I hear he’s a huge germophobe and he doesn’t want anyone getting near him. I hear he even has his own supply of air that only he’s allowed to breathe and no one else.
 
Tuyet, obvious Ranamon wannabe
Tuyet: I’ve heard that his face is just so handsome, that no common people are even allowed to THINK about seein’ it. An’ if that’s the case, all I can say is I’m not gonna rest until I get me a peek at this ultimate handsome man!
 
Vezon, no description needed
Vezon: Well, if he’s anything like his brother, I can think of a few good reasons why he’s locked up where no one can see him. When I was in prison with Karzahni, I tell you, it was something I won’t forget. He offered me a slice of pizza he kept in his pocket. I mean, what’s wrong with you?! Why would you offer me that? And I heard he was in the ocean for about a week, so do you have any idea how moldy and curdled that pizza slice might be?! I’d rather not have anything to do with Karzahni or his brother, if that’s the case.
 
Axonn, not Hydraxon’s Brother
Axonn: I personally believe it is because he is so absent minded and so into his insane inventions that he doesn’t even remember how to go outside. He might also be so antisocial that he does not know how to communicate face to face with someone.

Hydraxon: Never the less, the great creator’s physical appearance remains a great mystery, and yet so many of his inventions and creations have been circulated into our world. One of these creations would be the team that would eventually become the Toa Nuva.
 
Onua, reliable hero at the last minute
Onua: Before we got sent off to Karda Nui and before Kopaka and Pohatu vanished mysteriously, we all got summons to go there. It was weird and we were just teleported there. I’m guessing he was still touchy about the whole “secret base” thing. He gave us some fancy new armor and then zapped us to Karda Nui.
 
Lewa, bad boy who brushes with danger
Lewa: After we completed our destiny, I had to way-find Artakha’s island, out of fear the Makuta would do something terrible. Sadly, I got there too late and Artakha himself was swarm-conquered by Makuta and his minions. I wished to help him but he instead quick-sent me to this bizarre being called Tren Krom. It was very unpleasant, as he force-swapped minds and left me for dead. Luckily, Artahka himself later reversed this.

Hydraxon: Just beneath Metru Nui, deep in the central processor unit, there was a major quarrel between so many powerful beings alike. It was then that Artakha made himself shown to stop everything.
 
Helryx
Helryx: He was an interesting sight.
 
Brutaka
Brutaka: His voice hurt my ears.
 
Axonn
Axonn: He is no little girly man.
 
Makuta Miserix, last survivor of Makuta race and total nutjob
Miserix: The sight of him almost left me blind because he was so shiny. Hey, you wanna know why I look like this?
 
Vezon
Vezon: Know what? I take back whatever I said when I was initially interviewed about him. I wanna make him my new best friend!
 
Tuyet
Tuyet: He’s gorgeous! I’m sorry, Lhikan and Nidhiki, but I’ve found a new man to crush on!
 
Artakha, universal wizard and man of mystery
Artahka: Um… hello. I am Artakha. I… like to make stuff… and I used to make stuff for everybody. The reason I chose to show myself at that moment was because those insane freaks were arguing so loud, it was getting on my nerves, so I went in there to shut them up. Plus, when I sent Lewa to see Tren Krom, I was hoping he’d try and help us. You know, considering he ruled the universe at the very start? Instead, I was shocked to find out he tried to bail out on us. True, he did send Mata Nui some special message, but I didn’t like how he swindled Lewa out of his own body. And if everyone is just so darn curious as to WHY I never showed myself, it's mainly because I was so busy with everything on my DVR that I had no time to go out and socialize. About the time Makuta was attacking my island, I was watching reruns of That's so Raven. An unfortunate side effect is that I now have a mad crush on Anneliese van der Pol. Um… I’m normally not comfortable with cameras pointed at me like this… So can we wrap up this interview segment?

Hydraxon: Unfortunately, chaos would ensue as Makuta Teridax, the ruler of the universe at the time, decided to eject them into space. Toa Lewa’s quick thinking saved them, as did Vezon’s quick use of the Kanohi Olmak. The group would end up on Bota Magna, but Lewa would end up lost… Coming up next, what was the fate of Turaga Dume during the time of the Great Shadow? And later, he saved a rambunctious group of misfits and Artahka, but what happened to Toa Lewa? All that and more coming up next.

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The Dimwit of Time Saga
[Skyward Stooge] [The Dimwit of Time] [The Moron's Mask] [Twilight Delinquent] [The Wimp Waker]

[Lewa's Mask Chronicles]

 

[Bionicle: Unsolved Mysteries]

No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!


#23 Offline Akavakaku

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Posted Aug 01 2014 - 06:26 PM

This series is so great! What should we imagine Artakha's voice as?
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