Toa United, Review Topic Options

I really like this epic. I saw you posted a new chapter a couple of days ago and I was like 'Another epic by JG?! Yay!' and then I read it that night and the next morning. I just haven't be on the computer until now [yeah, I printed it up]. Anyway, I really like the whole idea of a training camp. I also love Kopaka's character. He's his normal 'cold' self, and yet does have a 'warm' side in which he shows for Lewa in helping him. I also love how Pohatu is a 'little brother' to Onua

With all the compliments aside, I have one critique: The battles toward the beginning of the story could have used more description - much more. Not trying to sound rude, but you did just go from one to the other, quickly going through each battle. However, the last two chapters were much better, since they were written later and I am confident that your skills have improved. I mean, my first Short Story was an absolute fail, where my Prologue for The Chronicles of Velox was much better in my opinion.

So, I eagerly await the next chapter - it's become very interesting. I must say that I'm extremely glad I wasn't around when you stopped posting chapters - all that waiting would have killed me

Good job again! You are truly a stunning author. I hope to see more great works from you soon! [In fact, I'm thinking of having a Short Stories contest in my blog soon (after BBCC #50 Unofficial of course)]

-TV