The Bionicles Try To Run A Nation, The sequel to the Bionicles try to Run a House! Options

[Toa Zehvor MT]

Still hoping this comedy will pick up the popularity it once had eventually, here's the next chapter

Chapter 15: The Piraka Take Over

Tahu Nuva: Well, that's that. I've officially become the first president to be impeached out of a job.
Tahu: You mean..
Tahu Nuva: Yep. I'm no longer the president.
Tahu: Well, that means the end of the comedy is near, doesn't it.
Tahu Nuva: Probably. Unless we find some way to...hold on...
Tahu: What are you thinking about?
Tahu Nuva: Yeah, we can do something with that...
Tahu: Listen, you just got kicked out of a job, not to mention the most important one in the nation, no need to make things worse...
Tahu Nuva:
Tahu: Too late.
Back at the house...
Hahli Inika: You're home!
Tahu Nuva: We're home. They got mad at me for robbing a bank in California..
Pohatu Nuva: And I saved you!!
Tahu Nuva: More or less. And I got impeached and lost. But they gave me a free pick at who got to be president after me!!
MT: Since when does that happen?
Tahu Nuva: So I chose...
Back at D.C.
Speaker: And presenting, your new president of the United States of America...
(lights dim and "stupefied" begins playing)
Nocturn: HERE HE COMES TO SAVE THE DAY, IT'S MIGHTY-
Gadunka: GGGAAAAAADDDDDUUUUNNNNNKKKKKAAAAAAAA.....
Nocturn: (grabs the microphone) He he is, from the 2007 storyline brought to you directly by TOYS-R-US!! Barraki killing, mask of life wanting, always hungry, and yelling his own name, your new president...
Gadunka: GGGAAAAAADDDDDUUUUNNNNNKKKKKAAAAAAAA.....
(strobe lights flash and music gets louder)
Nocturn: Who's the killing king of the ocean?!?
Gadunka: GADUNKA!!
Nocturn: Who's the biggest guy around?!?
Gadunka: GADUNKA!!
Nocturn: Who's a little pansy?!?
Gadunka: GADUN-.......(looks savagely at Nocturn)
Nocturn: Uh, I mean, who kills all the pansies in Makuta's flower garden?
Gadunka: Gadunka? (Makuta has a flower garden?)
Back at the house....
*RRIIINNNNGGGG!!!!!*
Tahu Nuva: Yes? What? You don't want that substitute? He's break dancing on the floor with strobe lights flashing and playing Disturbed? Oh, well, you wanted a new president. What? They're too bad? Well, you impeached me. You sincerely apologize? Yeah, I understand. Sure. No, I can't do it now, give me a month's break. I'll send some more substitutes over.
(puts down the phone)
MT: What was that?
Tahu Nuva: Apparently they want me back. Gadunka is the worst president ever.
MT: Well, at least he hasn't robbed any banks yet.
Tahu Nuva:
MT:
Tahu Nuva:
MT:
Tahu Nuva:
MT:
Tahu Nuva: That last one made no sense at all.
MT: Oh well. So who's taking your place?
Tahu Nuva: Well, they just escaped from the pool, so...
In D.C....
Speaker: Here is your new president of the United States...Zaktan the Piraka!!
(clapping)
(Zaktan comes onstage and does a lot of poses)
Speaker: Vice president Hakann...
(clapping)
Speaker: Treasurer Thok...
(clapping)
Speaker: Secretary Avak..
(clapping)
Speaker: General Vezok...
(clapping)
Speaker: And...Rapper Reidak?
Reidak: Yeah fools, listen all here, this Reidak 429, and I'm here to say, I'm 100% gansterified!!!
Zaktan: Oh no...
Hakann: I can just tell this is going to go great...

Can this country survive being ruled by the Piraka? Find out next chapter(s)

-MT

[Toa Zehvor MT]

Chapter 16: Toa Nuva vs. Piraka

Zaktan!!!
Zaktan: Huh?
ZAKTAN!!!
Zaktan: What? Who is it?!
It's me, Hakann! There's something down here you might want to see!
Zaktan: All right. (comes down)
Hakann: Notice anything different?
Zaktan: Uh...grass, people, sidewalks, fountains, rogue tanks road-raging over my lawn. Nope.
Hakann: Repeat that last one to yourself.
Zaktan: Rogue tanks road-WHAT THE HECK IS THAT TANK DOING RUNNING OVER MY LAWN?!?
Hakann: That's what we need to find out.
Zaktan: Well, how do we find out?
Hakann: Think. Who in the world would steal a tank like that?
Zaktan: Uh.....of course.
Later....
*Ring! Ring!*
Tahu: Hello?
Zaktan: Uh, did you possibly steal a tank?
Tahu: No....why?
Zaktan: Well, some tank just went joy-riding across the White House's front yard today, and it's making all the news.
Tahu: What makes you think I did it?
Zaktan: The tank-sounding noise in the background.
Tahu: You're crazy. I'm not driving a tank.
Matoran in the background: Look out for that car!!!
Zaktan: Uh-huh.
Tahu: I'm driving a...uh....monster truck!
Zaktan: On the freeway?!
Tahu: Yeah. Sure, why not-
*RRRUUUUUMMMMBBBBLLLLEEEEE!!!!!*
Zaktan: Because it might collapse.
Tahu: I see. Let's get this baby onto an exit.
(Tahu runs over three McDonalds and blows up another one)
Zaktan: And another thing, if you really are driving a monster truck, how come you can blow up McDonalds?
Tahu: Uh.....we...
Zaktan: See?
Tahu: We're using a gravity manipulator. We're making the building twist around and then collapse.
Zaktan: Uh-huh.
Tahu: Well, gotta go.
Zaktan: No wait a minute! That's no way to talk to the President-
*dial tone*
Zaktan: Hello? Hello?
Hakann: What happened?
Zaktan: He hung up!
Hakann: Hmm.
Later...
Zaktan: I call this meeting to discuss what has recently happened. Tahu, it seems, has stolen one of our tanks. This very much upset me, and-
Vezok: Um, just a minute, how could Tahu, a 6 inch tall Bionicle, possibly pose a threat to the nation's safety.
Zaktan: We're not discussing the nation's safety, although based off of past references, I'd say the nation's safety is one our next concerns.
Avak: Well then, Mr. President, what should be our first concern, outweighing the concern of our nation's safety?
Zaktan: My rose bushes on the front lawn.
Reidak: You know, you other 4 are making yourselves look pretty stupid since you voted for him to be president.
Thok: Well, it was either this or hear you "rapping" all day.
Reidak: And which is worse?!?
Thok: Your singing.
Hakann: But Zaktan's ruling is a close second!
Vezok: Actually, no, not really. Not close at all. Swimming in Pirana infested waters dressed as a chicken leg, now that's a close second.
Hakann: Ah. See, we could have voted for Vezok here and had him educate us.
Avak: Nothing's worse than a smart mouth, Hakann.
Hakann: True...
Reidak: It's even worse than my singing?
Hakann: No.
Reidak: Aw...
Zaktan: Wait a minute, I have an idea on how to get the tank back! Vezok, go send Tahu a letter that the Mask of Patriots is located here.
Vezok: Mask of...
Zaktan: Patriots. Tahu loves the Patriots for some reason. Tell him that it's here.
Vezok: Oookkkk....
Days later...
Avak: Uh, there seem to be 6 Toa Nuva breaking into the White House.
Zaktan: Where's the tank?!
Avak: Not here.
Zaktan: ARGH!! Tahu must of known I wanted it back and sent the Toa Nuva!
Avak: I see. Well, you can always-
Zaktan: We must defeat them-
CHARGE!!!!!
Zaktan: Or we can just let Reidak charge them.
(On the first floor)
Reidak: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!
Tahu Nuva: Shields up!!!
Reidak: AAA-*BBBOOOOOIIINNNNGGGG!!!!*
Tahu Nuva: My shield's a little too rubbery today.
Reidak: Ow...reinforcements!!!
Vezok: Here I am!! Rock you like a Hurricane!!
Lewa Nuva: How they got to lead the nation is beyond me.
Tahu Nuva: Come on, let's finish this.
Reidak: We beat you once, we'll do it again!
Tahu Nuva: You defeated us in a book. We're going to defeat you in a comedy.
Reidak: Oh. Darn it. Well, prepare to be enslaved!!!
Tahu Nuva: I'm ready!
*BONK!!*
Tahu Nuva: Ok, first off, that didn't enslave anyone, it just made someone go into spasms, and second off, you hit Gali, not me.
Onua Nuva: You hit a girl!! How dare you!!?
Reidak: Uh, well, I'm a Piraka, so...
Onua Nuva: Excuses, excuses. You're getting a spanking!!
Reidak: NOO!!! ANYTHING BUT THAT!!! WAAAAAHHH!
*spank spank*
Vezok: This is getting too random for me.
On the 2nd floor...
Zaktan: Where's Reidak!??
Vezok: Onua spanked him after he took out Gali. Last I saw, he was crying after being shoved roughly.
Zaktan: Oh, come on, he can deal with that!!
Vezok: He was shoved into a 20 foot brick wall. And he was shoved through it.
Zaktan: Oh. Well, the battle's 5 on 5 now, so..
Pohatu Nuva: Charge!!!
Zaktan: Uh, quick Vezok! What do all Presidents do in times of trouble!?
Vezok: Well, they act like a man and fight!!
Zaktan: Hmm. What else do they do?
Vezok: Well, some of the cowardice ones ran away, but-
Zaktan: We'll go with plan B. (runs)
Tahu Nuva: Get Zaktan!!
Vezok: You will not get past me!!
Tahu Nuva: I'm warning you! My shield is very rubbery!!
Vezok: Let's see if it can stand up to this!! (double fist smashes the shield)
BBBBOOOOIIIINNNGGGGG!!!!! (Vezok flies off into the roof)
Vezok: Ow....
Tahu Nuva: Warned you. Two down. Up the stairs!!
On the third floor...
Kopaka Nuva: Hey, more Piraka. Four this time.
Tahu Nuva: I got Zaktan.
Onua Nuva: Very well.
(Avak and Hakann change into a Piraka combo)
Avak-Hakann: Muahahahaha!!!
Floor: *crack*
Avak-Hakann: Oh no.
Onua Nuva: Need some more weight? (throws a rock on top of the floor)
*CRACK!!*
Pohatu Nuva: Noooo!! You made it too heavy!!
(Pohatu Nuva, Onua Nuva, Avak-Hakann, and Kopaka Nuva fall)
Lewa Nuva: Darn. We lost our advantage in numbers.
(On the top of the White House...)
Zaktan: I knew you'd be coming!
Tahu Nuva: You must be physcic!! Now let's test something. Can you sense your death?
Zaktan: Uh, maybe.
Tahu Nuva: No, you can't. Because if you could, you'd be sensing it right now.
Zaktan: Why?
Tahu Nuva: Because I'm going to kill you!!
Zaktan: Oh. Actually, you aren't.
(They fight until Zaktan gets the edge and knocks Tahu Nuva out, and grabs him above the edge of falling)
Zaktan: No, my enemy. There are still agonies you have yet to taste.
Tahu Nuva: I'd much prefer to taste a large pepperoni pizza, if we could substitute.
Zaktan: How can you talk? You're knocked out!!
Tahu Nuva: Apparently not. Oh, and do you like rubber?
Zaktan: Somewhat...
Tahu Nuva: Well then, you'll love this. (turns shield on)
*BBBOOOOOOIIIIIIINNNNGGG!!!!* (Zaktan goes flying over the White House)
Zaktan: I knew I should've opted for that better health plan-*CRASH!!!!*
Tahu Nuva: 3 down with the shield.
Back on the 3rd floor...
Lewa Nuva: ...We quick-defeated the Rahkshi, so...
Thok: You beat Rahkshi, huh? (grabs one of Lewa's air katana and tries to snap it) I pick my teeth with-*HURGH!! URGH!!*-Rahkshi-ERRGH!!!!
Lewa Nuva: Not quite as strong as Reidak, are you? (kicks him through the hole that Onua Nuva and Avak-Hakann made)
Lewa Nuva: It just occurred to me that I'm going to have to go through that hole to get my katana back. Darn it. (jumps)
WWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHOOOOOOOOO-*WWWWHHHHHAAAAAAAMMMMMM!!!!*
Tahu Nuva: What happened to the floor?!? And where is everyone?
*crickets*
Tahu Nuva: Ah well. I guess I'm President again!

-MT

[Kanohi mask of D...]

cant stop laughing

This post has been edited by Kanohi mask of DOOM: Jun 30 2008, 04:10 AM

[Toa Zehvor MT]

Uh, well, it is a Monday, so I suppose that makes my last statement true, although it is one Monday after I had planned to make the chapter.

Anyways...

Chapter 17: The White House Resistance Team

At the bottom of a very deep pit made by 3 floors collapsing in the White House...

Gali Nuva: What happened here?
Onua Nuva: What?
Reidak: Huh?
Gali Nuva: What happened-hey, you're the one that knocked me out!
*SLAP!!!*
Reidak: Ow!
Onua Nuva hits Reidak on the head
*BONK!!*
Reidak: Ow...(falls down unconscious)
Gali Nuva: Why is it you can knock people out and all I can do is slap?
Onua Nuva: I don't know. Everyone's here, Reidak, Lewa, Kopaka, Vezok, Thok, Avak-Hakann, you and I, and-where's Tahu and Zaktan?
On top of the White House...
Tahu Nuva: For the last time, Zaktan, give it up. You can't scale the side of the White House.
Zaktan(who is clinging to a wall of the White House at least 50 feet above ground): I'm still President! I can order a scaffold or something.
Tahu Nuva: This is getting ridiculous-what's that?
Zaktan: What? (looks down at his left hand and realizes his zamor sphere launcher is missing) HEY! LEAVE THAT ALONE!
Tahu Nuva: Oh, this launcher?
Zaktan: Put it down!!!
Tahu Nuva: Hey, this looks important.
Trigger: *pulls*
Zaktan: NNNNOOOOOOOO-*WHAM!!!!*
Tahu Nuva: Cool! I have enslaved Zaktan! Give me the title of president!
Zaktan: You may be president.
Random Reporters: *Gasp!*
Tahu Nuva: Yes! I am president! And I have one more order.
Zaktan: What is it?
Tahu Nuva: Let go.
Zaktan: Yes, my master. (lets go and falls 50 feet)
WHAP!!!
Tahu Nuva: I am President again! Finally!
Secret Service: What have you done with the President?
Tahu Nuva: I'm president now.
Secret Service member 1: *Gasp!* He threw him over the side!
SS member 2: Get Tahu!
Tahu Nuva: Wait, what? What are you doing? He let go! Watch it-
*BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!*
Hewkii Mahri: We've come to save you!!
Tahu Nuva: Yay! They stole Tahu's tank!
Secret Service: Ow...
Tahu Nuva: Death to the secret service! (pushes them over the side)
Lewa Nuva: That might be a bad idea, considering that they are going to protect you once you convince them you are president.
Tahu Nuva: Good point. Where are the rest of the Piraka?
Lewa Nuva: We defeated them with the help of the White House Nui Resistance Team.
Tahu Nuva: White House Resistance Team?
Lewa Nuva: Yep! There's Balsa', Garden, Peruke, Velvita, Kudzu, and Dali.
Tahu Nuva: You have GOT to be kidding me.
Lewa Nuva: Nope!
Hahli Mahri(at the foot of the White House): Well, we've got to be going!
Tahu Nuva: TAKE ME WITH YOU!!!!
Later....
Garden: Hello, Mr. President!
Tahu Nuva: Yes? You're one of the new resistance team, right?
Garden: Yes, I'm a Onu-Matoran who-
Tahu Nuva: Has a flowerpot on his head.
Garden: Yes, well, I like flowers.
Tahu Nuva: I see.
Garden: Anyway, I wanted to tell you that Brutaka has heard about the Piraka's defeat and has rounded up Gadunka, Nocturn, and the Barraki to go help him free the Piraka.
Tahu Nuva: Where are the Barraki?
Garden: We chained them to the room you sleep in.
Tahu Nuva: WHAT?!?!
Garden: Yep. We figured you'd want to look at them at night.
Tahu Nuva: And hear them arguing. Please move them to Lewa's room.
Garden: Yes sir. Anything else?
Tahu Nuva: Are the Mahri still here?
Garden: Yeah...
Tahu Nuva: Keep them here. We may need them to help fight.
Garden: Yes sir.
Tahu Nuva: Oh, and one more thing.
Garden: What is it, Mr. President?
Tahu Nuva: Take that stupid flowerpot off your head.
Garden: Yes sir....
Later....
Pohatu Nuva: Where are you going with those?
Garden: Me, Velvita, and Kazoo are carrying them to Lewa's room. Mr. President said he wanted them out of his room.
Pohatu Nuva: Poor Lewa.
Kudzu: It's not that bad, actually, and-
Pohatu Nuva: Is that a vine on your head?
Kudzu: Yes. It's not as bad as Velvita though. He has a piece of CHEESE on his head.
Velvita: Where there is a good burger, you will find cheese.
Pohatu Nuva:
Kudzu: And here I hate his riddles even more. Ah well, got Piraka moving to do.
Pohatu Nuva: I think I'm going to call the house and see if the real Voya Nui Resistance team can come.
To be continued...

-MT

[Toa Zehvor MT]

Sorry the next chapter's been taking so long. I've been really busy lately.

-MT

[Toa Zehvor MT]

Velvita: Mmm....(begins fighting Velvita)

how does someone fight themselves?

Other wise really funny MT! Keep up the good work.

Very good question. One I don't have an answer to.

However, I do have an answer to the question on your sig. A wise "Trauga" once said: "You spell it 'Turaga', stupid!!!" And then got kicked off a comedy for being insulting.

-MT

[Toa Zehvor MT]

New chapter time!

Chapter 20: The Toa Nuva Travel to San Diego

Tahu Nuva: Well, that's good. You guys are back. Now we can begin to plan my campaigning trips! Where shall we go first?
Pohatu Nuva: I don't know. How about you pick someone to choose where we go?
Gali Nuva: Chesapeake Bay.
Kopaka Nuva: Top of the Himalayas.
Lewa Nuva: Amazon Forest.
Onua Nuva: I'm pretty sure there's no one there to hear.
Tahu Nuva: Ok, this isn't working. Everyone's choosing a place that would suit them best. How about someone neutral chooses? One of the guest stars?
MT: Ok. I'll pick.
Tahu Nuva: Good.
Later, at a Starbucks.....
Lewa Nuva: *grumble* Why did he have to pick the Toa of Coffee?
Kopaka Nuva: This is a really poor substitute for the Himalayas.
Onua Nuva: I think we should all forget campaigning and go cave-exploring.
Lewa Nuva: I think no one agrees with you.
Pohatu Nuva: Let's just listen. Tahu's about to speak!
Tahu Nuva: (walks up to a microphone) Hey, um..uh...(looks up at the microphone) HEY!! AHEM!!!
Lewa Nuva: Oops. (flies over to the microphone and drops it several levels)
Tahu Nuva: That's better. Now, hello fellow Americans! Starbucks customers...
Gali Nuva: There are no customers here.
Tahu Nuva: Ok then, employees.
Gali Nuva: They've all left. The shop is empty.
Tahu Nuva: Ok, you know what? This sucks. Next time, I'm brining the GSs with us and then THEY can explain their stupid idea.
Back at the White House...
MT: All right. Since Tahu isn't around, we have to run the White House until they come back. So...what do you want to do?
Mr. Matoro: Zzzzz.....
GF: Zzzzzz.....
MT: All right. Since you seem to be so inventive...
Later...
Mr. Matoro: *Yawn!* Hey, GF, are-WHAT THE FRICK?!?
GF: What? What is it?
Mr. Matoro: Why is there a Starbucks shop outside?!?
GF: A what..oh. I think we know how that got there.
Mr. Matoro: Yep.
GF: So what do we do now?
Mr. Matoro: We take advantage of it...
Elsewhere....
Tahu Nuva: All right, so the Starbucks was a stupid idea. Where are we going next?
Lewa Nuva: The Amazon!!
Tahu Nuva: Lewa, no one else wants to go there.
Lewa Nuva: I'll give whoever sides with me $1000!
Kopaka Nuva: I'll go.
Tahu Nuva: Bribery could get you in jail for the rest of your life.
Lewa Nuva: So?
Tahu Nuva: Next to a Toa of Stone.
Lewa Nuva: Ooh.
Pohatu Nuva: Yeah, you wouldn't want to....wait....
Tahu Nuva: We're wasting time. Where are we going to go?
Gali Nuva: I have an idea. Let's see where we're SUPPOSED to go on the agenda, and then go there.
Onua Nuva: Doesn't sound so good. Who ever does that?
Gali Nuva: The actual presidents.
Onua Nuva: Well, Tahu's a president, and he's not doing it.
Tahu Nuva: Oh, yes we are. We're going to San Diego!!! In the limo everybody!!
10 hours later....
Tahu Nuva: Maybe the West Coast was a bad idea...
Pohatu Nuva: I hate road trips I hate road trips I hate road trips.
Lewa Nuva: Cheer up. It's not so bad.
Pohatu Nuva: I hate sadistic Toa of Air I hate sadistic Toa of Air I hate...zzzzz...(falls asleep)
Lewa Nuva: Thank goodness he's asleep.
Driver: We're here!
Lewa Nuva: And now..does this mean I have to carry him?
Tahu Nuva: Yep!
Lewa Nuva: Darn. Well, come on. Wait, why can't Onua carry him? He's got the mask of strength. Or we could go buy an RC Car and ride around in it.
Tahu Nuva: It makes you stronger.
Lewa Nuva: Hmph. Pretty convenient how whenever I build muscles, he saves 20 bucks.
Later....
Mr. Matoro: Hey, uh, MT. How's your coffee shop going?
MT: MY coffee shop? I asked for them to deliver a cup of coffee. They delivered a whole shop.
Mr. Matoro: So...there's no evil plan to foil?
MT: No. Why?
Mr. Matoro: Darn. Golden Flame, you can come out now. And you can leave the flares, generator, and electric fan behind.
MT: I don't even wanna know. Well, who wants to run a coffee shop?

To be continued...

-MT