 Torhu's Corner, Review my stories here... |
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 May 1 2002, 10:48 PM
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#1
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  Death of the Great Spirit  Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142 
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Here's the corner to discuss any and all of the fics I may post in here. Currently it's only Te Mutunga, but I may write more some other time.
Also...for any first time viewers. Be carefeul reading here, as it may contain spoilers. And you never want a Torhu Fic spoiled.  So have fun discussing. I can't wait to see what people have to say. (Edit: Addendum officially added...name pending) Current Project: Rebirth Of Fusion Te Mutunga Saga: 1) Te Mutunga (Epic) 2) Little Ami (Short Story) 3) Kuga's Story (Short Story) 4) Proving Grounds (Addendum) - 1st Place: Epic Contest 5 Other Serious Works: 5) The Alliance (Epic) 6) Kopaka Warms Up (Short Story) 7) Everybody's Fool (Short Story) - 1st Place: Short Story Contest 3 Geo-Parody: 8) Geo-Parody (Short Comedy) 9) Geo-Parody: Round 2 (Short Comedy) Other Comedies: 10) Makuta's Press Conference (Short Comedy) - 2nd Place: Comedy Contest 1 11) Two Sides To Everything (Short Comedy) - 2nd Place: Comedy Contest 2 12) Torhu Hybrid And The Holy Grail (Epic Comedy) This post has been edited by T-Hybrid: Nov 25 2006, 02:11 PM -------------------- |
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May 2 2002, 04:01 PM
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#2
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 Stalwart Defender  Group: New Members Posts: 440 Joined: 2-April 02 Member No.: 1087
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well you never finished the first enounter
-------------------- He is my Rock and my Salvation.
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May 2 2002, 04:26 PM
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#3
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 Fluidic Master Nuva Group: New Members Posts: 1304 Joined: 21-October 01 Member No.: 967
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You can put Tahuna in it...
-------------------- I am Tahuna.
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May 2 2002, 10:30 PM
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#4
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Uh... no!
That's not even a real character.... ANd yes, I never finished it..but that's because it is an epic...I'm going to post what I have and slowly add more. -------------------- |
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May 8 2002, 03:22 PM
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#5
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 Conqueror of the Swarm! Group: New Members Posts: 716 Joined: 26-August 01 Member No.: 810
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Hey, I like this story so far
 I can't wait for more 
-------------------- It's Your Density
Imitation Is The Highest Form Of Flattery  |
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May 14 2002, 08:15 AM
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#6
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 Defender of Mata Nui  Group: Prem Forum Leaders/Reporters Posts: 2105 Joined: 15-October 01 Member No.: 102
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One word: Oy.
Te Mutunga, or at least your first 7 chapters, only gets more and more unsettling. How much longer until it bottoms out for the Toa? Or will the DTotA simply manhandle the Toa from cover to cover?  -KIE -------------------- "...when all is said and all has come undone
restore the promise I made when I was young now unto Him who can keep us from falling and present us faultless before His glory...." Newsboys Breathe (benediction) [2nd verse]     |
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May 19 2002, 12:45 PM
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#7
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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That is actually the most common response this fic got when it was back in its original forum.
It's kinda weird huh. I guarentee you'll love it as I go. -------------------- |
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May 28 2002, 03:29 PM
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#8
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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I've added about 5 chapters to the story.
Take a look...things are about to get rather interesting. -------------------- |
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May 28 2002, 03:43 PM
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#9
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 Emerging Defender of Mata Nui Group: New Members Posts: 2065 Joined: 17-March 02 Member No.: 99
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The training should be entertaining.
Onua
I guess you are right, maybey whenua doesn't like onua's new atitude. -------------------- *Hath just realized that he's member number 99...how time flies. Has it been that long ago?*
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Jun 4 2002, 07:32 PM
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#10
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 Conqueror of the Swarm! Group: New Members Posts: 716 Joined: 13-March 02 Member No.: 319
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Well I think this is a really great fic. Mahi turning into a Turaga was a big surprise, and I am interested to find out more about Rangi. Can't wait for more!
P.S. You double posted! Sorry, couldn't help it. --------------------  The credit goes to the Panda King |
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 Jun 5 2002, 11:18 AM
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#11
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 Emerging Flying Force Group: New Members Posts: 2228 Joined: 14-April 02 Member No.: 1053
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Te Mutunga was fantastic! I hope you write more!
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Jun 6 2002, 02:54 PM
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#12
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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You're in luck. I only had time during the summer to write this...but guess what time of the year it is!!
Hopefully this summer will see a conculsion... *crosses fingers* -------------------- |
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Jun 11 2002, 08:43 AM
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#13
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Just so you know...Part 21 is up.
With school out I should be able to finish this baby off. *crosses fingers* -------------------- |
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Jun 16 2002, 06:59 PM
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#14
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 Anti-Physicist  Group: Forum Administrators Posts: 6291 Joined: 15-December 01 Member No.: 504
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Wow, Torhu, you're really doing a spectacular job on this! It is a gripping tale; I can't wait for the conclusion! Keep it up.
-------------------- Kaiapu: Small gifts, given and received. Strange words, spoken and heard. Now turbo-powered! |Kaiapu Gets Engaged!|Kaiapu's Stories|    |
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Jun 17 2002, 07:21 AM
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#15
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Fluidic Master Nuva Group: New Members Posts: 1316 Joined: 2-April 02 Member No.: 717
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It's totally cool!!!I really like it because:
1.It's cool. 2.It's cool. 3.It's written by a almighty Mod. Did I mention that it's cool? -------------------- ~KA, the guy with the stupid name, reborn from the dead. June 7, 2005~
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Jun 17 2002, 01:33 PM
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#16
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 Encountering Protodermis Group: New Members Posts: 850 Joined: 7-February 02 Member No.: 630
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I love it! It would be interesting to see what would happen if the Toa were defeated.
 Why don't the Toa have all their masks if Te Mutunga takes places after Makuta?
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Jun 30 2002, 03:02 PM
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#17
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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It's kinda a simple explanation really. Te Mutunga was started at the earliest days of Bionicle (back in July of 2001) This was before much was known about the masks (including the Gold Masks) So I didn't know the Gold Masks would come...and I didn't know that collecting the masks would be something that would play such a large role in the story. Te Mutunga follows this background...The Toa have collected some...but not all their masks...so they don't have their golds at this point. -------------------- |
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Jul 24 2002, 10:21 AM
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#18
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Defender of Mata Nui Group: Prem Forum Leaders/Reporters Posts: 2105 Joined: 15-October 01 Member No.: 102
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Not to give everyone asthma with the dust I'm blowing off by posting here, but Torhu, when are you going to post the next chapter? You said you should be able to finish this off this summer.
-KIE -------------------- "...when all is said and all has come undone
restore the promise I made when I was young now unto Him who can keep us from falling and present us faultless before His glory...." Newsboys Breathe (benediction) [2nd verse] |
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Jul 24 2002, 11:45 AM
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#19
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 Illusion of the Past Group: Outstanding BZPower Citizens Posts: 8030 Joined: 20-December 01 Member No.: 189
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KIE, I haven't seen you to much lately!
Good story Torhu! -------------------- Jun-9: Chapter 3 is up!
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Jul 25 2002, 03:22 PM
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#20
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Sorry about that... I didn't anticapte two vacations and a whole lotta work involving PSEO and an actual job. Hopefully I'll be able to find some time to continue work on it...but currently and opprotunity has not shown itself. -------------------- |
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Jul 28 2002, 12:25 PM
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#21
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Emerging Flying Force Group: New Members Posts: 2228 Joined: 14-April 02 Member No.: 1053
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I used to read Te mutunga all the time, but now I don't because Torhu doesn't put up any updates anymore.
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Dec 4 2002, 09:35 PM
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#22
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 Mata Nuian Protector Nuva Group: Banned Members Posts: 1746 Joined: 24-December 01 Member No.: 40
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Great story! I love the action and suspense! 19/10.
Hmmm... maybe Torhu can grant those who review well PE...  .
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Dec 4 2002, 11:20 PM
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#23
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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I could....but I probably shouldn't.  Thanks for posting too. Glad to see that I didn't have to revive this to get attention 
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Dec 5 2002, 06:37 AM
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#24
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 A Curling Wisp of Mist, Here then Gone Again  Group: Premier Forum Leaders Posts: 5879 Joined: 11-October 01 Member No.: 93
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Great story, Torhu. I feel like I'm right there in the middle of all the action! And I really like that you built characters first, and then wrote about them. It's what I did in Mata Haru.
:thumbsup: -------------------- I've got a black hole in my mind.
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Dec 6 2002, 05:56 PM
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#25
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Rangi and Khultak actually made it into the story by accident.
I hadn't planned for it to happen...but then I came across a problem...and realized I could use my two Toa to fill in the gap. -------------- By the way....the new season is up and going. Hopefully I'll be able to post new Chapters every few days or so. -------------------- |
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Dec 6 2002, 08:57 PM
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#26
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A Curling Wisp of Mist, Here then Gone Again Group: Premier Forum Leaders Posts: 5879 Joined: 11-October 01 Member No.: 93
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NO!!! Not Onepu... :crying: He's my favorite Tohunga! *SOB!*
Great update, Torhu. I hope the villagers don't kill each other! Edit: Torhu, the Pahrak-Kal is the next level! Cool! This post has been edited by Makuta Master: Dec 6 2002, 08:59 PM -------------------- I've got a black hole in my mind.
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 Dec 6 2002, 10:14 PM
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#27
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 Seeker Group: New Members Posts: 249 Joined: 25-October 02 Member No.: 2452
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That was an awesome story, or at least the part I read... but why does everybody have to die. I mean, if you are trying to represent Pestilence, Death, Famine and War, you can have lands destroyed and creatures killed, but NOT tohunga, turaga, toa etc. I'll probably get all my proto energy taken away for saying that, but I liked Pohatu and all those characters that had to be killed...and if you killed Onepu, BEWARE THE WRATH OF ME!
 ! (This is not a threat)PF was here -------------------- Elzaban says, "Anyone who reads this will instantly fall in love with it."
Israeli toa calls it, "magnificent." Haunuva's first comments were, "Oh...my...dear...god." Hailed by writers like Israeli toa and Nova nuhvok, is the epic Dasaku the warlord. I was the first to use quotes from my review! Smart ol' me! God bless America! |
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Dec 7 2002, 01:13 AM
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#28
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Let me talk again about the Death.
----------------- I don't kill randomly, Kopaka was all part of their plan....Pohatu was just an added bonus. Hopefully I've gotten across that the DTotA are ruthless monsters. These aren't just some out of control wildlife. They ARE evil. And there is a method to all this...and I hope the pieces start falling together as the fic moves along. And since it seems I've irked the Onepu fans a bit. Let me assure you that I've still got big plans for the little guy. (And know they didn't change to appease you...I've actually had this planned for a while) I have a feeling this next chapter may by quite interesting indeed.... This post has been edited by Torhu: Dec 7 2002, 01:15 AM -------------------- |
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Dec 7 2002, 01:56 AM
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#29
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 Tahnok-Kal Overloaded  Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 4442 Joined: 3-September 02 Member No.: 2021
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I like your story Torhu. When will the next update be?
-------------------- "My name's the Doctor and we're in a library... look me up!" - The Doctor; Doctor Who - Silence in the Library.
Currently on the lookout for a Copper/Bronze Level 5 (last Kraata needed!). Big rewards offered! |
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Dec 7 2002, 10:39 AM
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#30
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Hopefully sometime today. Keep an eye out on the top of Epics. (It's gonna be coool!) ------------------------------------------- (Edit: The new chapter is now up!) This post has been edited by Torhu: Dec 7 2002, 11:37 AM -------------------- |
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 Dec 7 2002, 01:05 PM
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#31
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Descending into Protodermis Group: New Members Posts: 1088 Joined: 25-September 02 Member No.: 1946
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Great story!
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Dec 7 2002, 01:11 PM
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#32
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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You'll be glad to see that Onepu has a substantial part in Chapter 26. -------------------- |
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 Dec 7 2002, 02:53 PM
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#33
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 Ice Warrior Group: New Members Posts: 1984 Joined: 24-November 02 Member No.: 2661
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Yay, you finally updated the story. I seriously thought you wern't going to continue it for a while. I was a guest when I saw the first post of this story. I was too chicken to sign up.
-------------------- "Mr. Brady, it is the duty of a newspaper to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable." -E.K. Hornbeck
"My god, it's full of stars."- David Bowman All posts and MOCs dedicated to Kit Siero, 2000-2002, and to all my pets "Fandom is a state of mind... not how big your wallet is."- Raptoa Song of Bzpower Told you it would still be there.  |
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Dec 7 2002, 03:21 PM
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#34
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Mata Nuian Protector Nuva Group: Banned Members Posts: 1746 Joined: 24-December 01 Member No.: 40
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WOW!!! Great chapter!
You really developed the Dark Toa better! Great job!!! 10000/10!!! -------------------- |
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Dec 8 2002, 03:13 PM
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#35
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Oh yeah. Character developement for these four was needed in spades.
And I REALLY like Pakanga.... ------------------ The DTotA are actually shaping up better than I thought they would...I was afraid they'd come off TOO stereotypical. Oh well....I'm gonna have some fun with these four before the stories done. -------------------- |
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 Dec 8 2002, 04:10 PM
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#36
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 Nuhvok-Kal Attacks!  Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 3051 Joined: 2-December 02 Member No.: 2933
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Cool
This stuff is so cool I just finished reading it, and it's great When will there be more? 
This post has been edited by Inuyasha: Dec 8 2002, 04:11 PM --------------------  "The world is not beautiful, and that, in a way, lends it a sort of beauty." -Kino's Journey |BZP Reference Desk||BZP's Chief Rules||Sig Guidelines||New Member FAQ||!! Pictures Topic !!||CoT Official Topic and RPG Guide||BZPower Lexicon| |
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Dec 9 2002, 12:57 PM
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#37
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Emerging Flying Force Group: New Members Posts: 2228 Joined: 14-April 02 Member No.: 1053
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I have to say Torhu, this a great saga! I just hope Onepu will come out good again...
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Dec 10 2002, 08:20 PM
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#38
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Mata Nuian Protector Nuva Group: Banned Members Posts: 1746 Joined: 24-December 01 Member No.: 40
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The New chapter is great!!! I hope that the next one is action based
 at least... I hope
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Dec 10 2002, 11:53 PM
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#39
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Death of the Great Spirit Group: Premier Outstanding BZP Citizens Posts: 17759 Joined: 31-July 01 Member No.: 142
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Yeah...I figured we needed some character and story advancement. Just be warned...I'm going to do that occasionally. Action is good, but the DTotA have a plan...and I want to make sure that they don't seem like just another villian. I always hate when the Ubervillian is never around... -------------------- |
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Dec 11 2002, 09:29 PM
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#40
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Ice Warrior Group: New Members Posts: 1984 Joined: 24-November 02 Member No.: 2661
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So.... Should we expect a huge battle of good and evil? *Everyone nods*
-------------------- "Mr. Brady, it is the duty of a newspaper to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable." -E.K. Hornbeck
"My god, it's full of stars."- David Bowman All posts and MOCs dedicated to Kit Siero, 2000-2002, and to all my pets "Fandom is a state of mind... not how big your wallet is."- Raptoa Song of Bzpower Told you it would still be there. |
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