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holiday hours are the devil's work. nobody should be stuck in a mall until 11 because christmas.


least of all me

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I can call them up and mention that you've killed me repeatedly, if that will help. 


"Yes uh hello. My name is Portalfig, and I'm calling to let you know that one of your employees, Xaeraz, has brutally murdered me multiple times and is such an cool dude."


brilliant plan for getting out of working til 11

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k i'll just need your full name, the phone number for where you work, any and all credit cards you may own and a letter from a president giving you a sick day.


my brilliant plans are not cheap

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We in the US need to really change our culture regarding holidays. I get it, sales are nice, and you want to give people you love something really nice. But the desire for good shopping shouldn't overshadow the fact that these holidays are supposed to be (or at least should be) about spending time with family, friends and loved ones. (Or yourself, I guess, if that's your thing.) We need to get rid of Black Friday madness and stop this ridiculous notion that shops should be open until midnight on Christmas Eve. If you haven't shopped by then, that's your own darn fault.


But what do I know. I don't work in retail.

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