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Boyfriend Wanted


Kaleidoscope Tekulo

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BEHOLD ANOTHER CREEP-TASTIC BLOG ENTRY FROM TEKULO!

 

Will it be super awkward and uncomfortable? COUNT ON IT!

 

Tekulo is currently so desperate for human contact that he's taking applications for a long-distance relationship online boyfriend. BECAUSE WHY NOT?

 

Perks include:

 

-Me getting someone to vent to about whatever random drama

-Conversations filled with smiley faces, heart emotes and *hugs* typed for hours on end

-Lots of cat pics

-Even more cat pics

-Pokemon nerd-fests

-Accepting Eevee as a religion

-Always having someone to talk to, but being safely out of reach just in case the other person is a total creep (ahahahaha...HAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

-Complaining about obnoxious sports fans and the patriarchy

-Complaining about literally everything else in the world

-Random compliments on your appearance even though we'd have no idea what the other looks like

-placing your hand on the monitor to pretend we are holding hands/highfiving.

-Crying alone at night when the other person goes offline. 8D

 

Send in your application via snail mail sent to Santa Claus at the North Pole because who knows where those things end up anyway.

 

Are you also terribly desperate and have given up in all faith of humanity? Tekulo wants YOU (unless I don't).

 

Please note that this entire blog entry is not to be taken seriously. This entire idea sounds terrible and this would probably never work out anyway. You could totally do better. The only reason I typed all of this out is because I have like three hours to kill. I can't go outside because it's raining and this gave me a small chuckle in my mundane and dull life. If you haven't run away from this entry screaming by now, then kudos.

 

~Lapis

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There's an app for that.

 

Technology is a dangerous thing.

 

...he says via his networked computational device.

 

-L

  • Upvote 3
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There's an app for that.
 Technology is a dangerous thing.
...he says via his networked computational device. -L
Shhh

 

eevee isn't a religion
Don't tell me how to live my life.

 

I'm straight and I'm tempted, shouldn't be a long wait. =P 
-
:burnmad:
Aww, shucks. ^///^
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:kaukau: Wait Tekulo, didn't we already get married that one time in Vegas?  Why would you ever want a boyfriend?

 

And also, touching my monitor won't work for me.  I have a touch screen, and it would do obnoxious things.

 

24601

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I would respond to your ad, but in about a month I'll be doing this with my current girlfriend for about two years time. There's only so many emotions I can spare.

 

Granted we know what each other looks like, but still....

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