SIR! I HAVE SOME IDEAS, SIR!

5000 LIMBLESS PUSHUPS, SIR!

BENCHPRESS THE USS ABRAHAM LINCOLN, SIR!

ACID-FILLED OBSTICLE COURSE, SIR!

KP DUTY ALONE, SIR!

ACID-FILLED OBSTICLE COURSE, SIR!

REQUIRE SPELLCHECK TO BE USED, SIR!

ACID-FILLED OBSTICLE COURSE, SIR!

REQUIRE SPELLCHECK TO BE USED, SIR!

MY COMPUTER DETECTS NO ERRORS, SIR!

ACID-FILLED OBSTICLE COURSE, SIR!

REQUIRE SPELLCHECK TO BE USED, SIR!

MY COMPUTER DETECTS NO ERRORS, SIR!

USE THE GOOGLE, SIR.

Free candy and soda and video games, SIR!

Yes drill Sargehnt! Will do drill sargehnt! Will that be all drill sargehnt! How about scrubbin the toilets with dumbells drill sargehnt!

RIDING ON THE BACK OF A LOBOTOMIZED ROBOTIC COCKROACH THROUGH LANDMINE-INFESTED SNOWDRIFTS IN OUR UNDERGARMENTS, SUH!

SHOVELING SIDEWALKS TO BUILD CHARACTER, SUH!

READING ALL OF WUTHERING HEIGHTS IN ONE SITTING, SUH!

ATTENDING A VOGON POETRY SESSION, SIR!

BEING TAKEN TO THE TOTAL PERSPECTIVE VORTEX, SIR!

BEING STUFFED IN A ROOM WITH ALL OF MY PRESONALITIES, SIR!

Taking a special six-week class over summer vacation from drill sergeant Barbie.

Taking a special six-week class over summer vacation from drill sergeant Barbie.

RUN BAREFOOT THROUGH A TRENCH OF ANGRY WOLVERINES, SIR!

TEAR DOWN A BRICK WALL WITH OUR BARE HANDS, SIR!

HEAD-BUTT A TWO-BRICK-THICK WALL BRICK WALL, SIR!

End the G.I Joe fad would be my worst nightmare.

Not.