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The Bionicle Mary Sue Litmus Test Remix


Kevin Owens

2,579 views

I created this test for one very, very simple reason

To break you

The Bionicle Mary Sue Litmus Test ReMIX Ft. Prince Janus and Friar Tuck



If you are going to post your results then only post the relevent parts and not the whole test!!!!


Please read these disclaimers. First, the title is a little bit deceptive. This is not quite a Mary Sue test, but a cliché test and power. You will be gain Points for being cliché and intensely powerful. Now how this test works. The test proposes a simple yes or no question. If you answer yes, you take the designated Point count. If you answer no, you go onto the next question. Some questions do not have a designated Point value. That's because I honestly couldn't think of a Point value to assign them and often it's relative. You should take it with a grain of salt, and assign the Point value you think you deserve.

ALSO, if your character has access to a power by abnormal means, count the Points for the normal means. For example, if you have a Vortix that can control gravity through some kind of magical power, then you would take the three Points that you would normally get for having a Toa of Gravity. This goes for all mask powers as well.

If you have an ability here that is not listed but you think you should take Points for, please go ahead and make up a Point value for it and I will consider adding it to the test.

I am also aware that I am not taking into account any of the post '08 stuff. That is because I am not as familiar with that as I am the Matoran Universe. Furthermore, I have no intention to pursue post '08, so very likely there will not be a section with that.

That said, this will not be easy to get a passing grade on. This test is a tool that you should use to brutally tear apart your character in order to locate and identify potential weak Points. This is not a test that you take, get a good score on, give yourself a pat on the back, and go about your marry way because you think you have a unique character. Do not be upset if you come close to, or even go several Points over the fail line. This is especially true of RP characters that have been around for any extended period of time, such as 5+ years. This test was originally intended for character concepts or characters that were relatively new. So don't sweat it if you pick up a dozen Points because you've saved the island multiple times.

That said, experience does not excuse you for cliché ridden and overpowered characters. If you are a pirate captain who wields a katana while sailing on the good ship S.S. Doom Rider then you need to take a huge step back and reconsider your character.

And I feel like I need to state this again, but this test is meant to viciously tear apart your character. It is meant to break you. Please do not get upset at me because your perfect character failed because he flies around with wings, backhands makuta on a regular bases, and is a Toa of twilight. This is a test. A tool. Feel free to disregard the results if you think I'm full of it because your totally awesome character whom all your friends love fails this test.

Tired of the disclaimers? Well then let's get started.

Who are you?


What's in a name?
-Does the character share the Author's/Player's name? (This can be their first name, middle name, or the name they go by in chat or an online forum.) 10 Points. Yes, 10 Points. This is actually pretty mild; most Mary Sue litmus tests will automatically flunk a character for this. I admit I'm tempted to do the same.)
-Does the character have a really cool name, like Hunter, Killer, or Death? (2 Points. 4 Points if the name sounds like an AOL user name or a fourteen-year-old wannabe hacker's handle.)
-Does the character's name include the name of a weapon? (Darksword, Gunbot, or just being called Scythe) (1 Point)
-Does the character have more than one name (i.e. a nickname or a pseudonym)? (1 Point for each name)
-Does the character's name have anything to do with disease? (Plague, Virus, Pox, that sort of thing.) (1 Point)
-Is the character's name based on an existing character's name? (Mega Tahu, that sort of thing. If the name is based on more than one character, such as "Gopaka", count the Points for each character.) (2 Points each)
-Is the character's name based on or include a musical term? (1 Point)
-Does your character's name include a color? (1 Point)
-Does your character's name include a title that you use constantly such as Father, King, or Warrior? (2 Points)
-Does he have a name that sounds like an occidental trying to sound Oriental or American Indian (i.e. "Midnight Tiger")? (1 Point)
-Did the character choose his name himself?
-Do you ever, even just to yourself, refer to the character as "me" or "I"? (10 Points. Do not count this if you write from first person.)

Is your character the leader of a major organization?
-A leader of a group of Toa? (1 Point)
-A leader of a group that fights evil? (2 Points)
-A leader of highly trained mercs that kill people for money? (2 Points)
-A leader of a major political power? (2 Points)
-A leader of a group that kicks puppies because they're evil like that? (3 Points)
-A leader of a group of power hungry people who want to rule the city/world/universe/space-time continuum? (3 Points)
-A leader of a group of people who want to rule the city/world/universe/space-time continuum for the lulz? (4 Points)
-A leader of highly trained ninjas? (6 Points. If your men are stealthy and specialize in assassination then count this towards them.)
-Is said organization part of some kind of resistance against a power greater than itself? (2 Points. Note: Six Toa against a Makuta does not count. Six Toa against the government and its Vahki do.)

What is your character?
-A Matoran? (0 Points. If he has Toa powers count him as a Toa)
-A Toa (1 Point)
-A Rahkshi (1 Point)
-A Bohrok (1 Point)
-A support unit (rahi or something similar)? (0 Points)
-A some other species (Krekka, Vortixx, etc.) (1 Point)
-A Toa/Matoran/Rahkshi/Other with powers beyond the norm (5 Points)
-A hybrid of two or more things (2 Points, hordika are exempt from this rule)
-An alien from another planet/galaxy (3 Points. Note: Going from Bara Manga to the Matoran Universe counts as this)
-A Makuta with limited powers and abilities (5 Points)
-A Makuta with regular powers and abilities (7 Points)
-A Makuta with regular powers and abilities, and then some (10 points
-A cosmic and/or supernatural being such as a god, great being, great spirit, or an old one (Honestly, this isn't the test for you. Gods tend to surpass regular beings to the Point they automatically fail)

What's your character's origin? (Choose all that apply.)
-The usual, I guess; nothing to write home about (0 Points)
-A Matoran turned into a Toa by Toa stones (1 Point)
-A Matoran turned into a Toa by some other means? (2 Points)
-From the future (3 Points)
-From the past (2 Points)
-From another dimension (1 Point, if he is from one of the universe above in the hanging out question, count those Points)
____That just happens to closely resemble, or in fact be, modern-day Earth (5 Points)
____Where the universe he's in now is fiction (5 Points)
-Did your character suffer a traumatic effect in his/her past?
-Was an ordinary Matoran/toa until Something Happened (2 Points, and see below)

Does your character undergo any physical or metaphysical transformation in the story or back-story? (i.e., was he something else before?)
Note: MAJOR upgrades count, but most "normal" upgrades don't. A Matoran to Toa would not count. Toa to cyborg that shoots lasers out of his eyes does.
-Genetically enhanced? (1 Point per aspect. Speed. Strength. Etc.)
-Specifically, a Toa/Matoran into a robot/cyborg/similar? (2 Points)
-If so, did they die before being "rebuilt" as a robot/cyborg/whatever? (5 Points)
-Do you wish you could be transformed into something like the character? (2 Points)
-Does the character angst and/or complain about his new form, despite it being more powerful than his old form? (1 Point)
-Or, conversely, does the character just cheerfully accept it and move on like nothing happened? (2 Points. There *is* a happy medium for this sort of thing, you know.)

What do you do?

Tell me, what is your day job?
-Fight Evil (1 Point)
-Own his own lab? (1 Point)
-Sit around all day for no good reason? (1 Point)
-Travel the world as a wanderer? (1 Point)
____In order to get revenge on an enemy? (2 Points)
-Work for a BoM of OoMN? (3/4 Points respectively)
-A pirate? (2 Points)
____A Pirates of the Caribbean esque pirate who really has a heart of gold? (4 Points)
____A pirate that uses a katana? (Automatic failure. You can try to justify it all you want, but I refuse to accept any excuse for this)
-A Ninja (3 Points)
-Kill people for money? (3 Points) (If your character is a bounty hunter, assassin, Dark Hunter, or mercenary, answer "yes.")
-Have an established character (i.e. Taipu) as a student/flunky? (3 Points, 5 Points if he happens to be a major character such as Makuta)
-Hang out with characters from wildly different games/cartoons/movies/TV shows?
____Sonic? (10 Points)
____Mario? (5 Points)
____Megaman? (3 Points)
____Kingdom Hearts? (10 Points)
____ Naurto/Bleach/some other generic anime show (12 Points)

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)
-Can't fight (-2 Point)
-My own two fists (0 Points)
-A typical zamor launcher (1 Point)
-A cordak blaster (2 Points)
-A firearm(3 Points)
-A *really powerful* firearm (4 Points)
-Telekenesis (2 Points. 1 Point if this is your only offensive technique besides fists.)
-Explosives (3 points for regular grenades sized explosions. 5 points for medium sized explosions. 10 points if you can take out a base with your explosions)
-A staff or whip (0 Points)
-A knife(1 Point)
-A spear, mace, flail, morning star, or some other kind of medieval weapon that is not a sword (3 points)
-An Exo-Toa or similar robot (5 Points)
-A sword (3 Points)
-A Katana or some other ninja weapon? (5 Points)
-I don't lift a finger. I just use my INCREDIBUL POWURZ (15 Points. note, Toa/Mask powers do not count as this, but stuff such as huge magical beams do)

The right stuff
-My weapon is huge like a claymore or a rail gun (1 point)
-My weapon is made out of protosteel (2 Points)
-My weapon is made out of a material stronger than protosteel (3 points)
-My weapon has laser atributes such as a lightsaber or a laser gun (4 Points)

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.
Count each element as a separate power. (e.g. Controlling both Gravity and Shadow would net you 8 Points. 5 from Shadow and 3 from Gravity)
-Does your Toa control a traditional power? (Fire, Earth, Rock, Wind, Water, Ice) (0 Points)
-Does your Toa control an unorthodox power? (Electricity, Plants etc.) (1 Point)
-Does your Toa control a custom power?
-Does your Toa control gravity or Iron? (3 Points)
-Does your Toa control Light/Shadow (5 Points. If you control both then take 10 Points)

What's your mask power?
Note: If your species can not use a mask or your character does not use a mask skip this section
-Elda (-1 Point)
-Kaukau, Rau, Ruru, Rode(1 Points)
-Hau, Miru, Akaku, Sanok, Iden, Arthron, Zatth(2 Points)
-Kakama, Paraki, Mahiki, Komau, Calix, Kandin, Huna, Volitak, Kulasi(3 Points)
-Jutlin, Avsa, Felnas, Mohtrek, Shelek, Crast (4 Points, 8 if a Toa)
-Olmak, Tryna(5 Points)
-Olisi, Krahkan, or Avohki(7 Points)

From here to there. How does your character move about?
-Walks? (0 Points)
-Ride a Kikalano or something similar? (1 Point)
-Takes a Boat/Airship? (1 Point)
____That He/She owns? (1 more Point)
-Fly?
____Via jetpack? (2 Points)
____Via wings? (3 Points)
-A personal hover bike ala Ussa-Nui or something similar? (1 Point)

If your transportation is mechanical, how customized is this thing?
-No bells or whistles or this thing. It's got default factory settings. (0 Points)
-I payed a little bit more for a few little doodads. Nothing spectacular. (1 Point)
-I bought a regular thing and then tooled it to fit my own style. (2 Points)
-I built it from scratch. (3 Points)

Take half Points if you're a Role Player for this next section.
All in a day's work
-Does the character save other character(s)? (1 Point.)
-The Koro/Wahi? (2 Points.)
-The island that he inhabits? (3 Points)
-The world? (4 Points)
-At the last minute? (1 Point)
-Do you fail? (-2 Points.)
-Using a newly-developed move which "takes a lot out of them?"
-Does he then proceed to pick himself up and repeat the move several times, taking less and less time to recover every time?
-Is said move capable of seriously damaging a robot with one hit (i.e. would do 50% damage or more if it was actually in real life)?
-Was that "newly-developed move" literally thought of in the last couple of seconds?
-Does said move kill your character?

Accomplishments:
Triple all Points for this section if your character just came into existence
-Is the character the son/daughter/creation of a standard character? (2 Points)
-Does the character fight/oppose an army of bad guys? (2 Points)
-And whoop them all with one hand?
-This time, is it personal?
-Does the character rehabilitate a villain?
-Any BoM/DH members? (1 Point)
-Roodaka, Lariska, any other established character?(3 Points)
-A Makuta? (8 Points)
-Does your character accomplish something single-handedly that others have not been able to accomplish, or have been able to accomplish only at great cost, such as killing a Makuta? (5 Points)
-Does your character die? (1 Point)
-Heroically? (2 Points)
-At the hands of the ultimate villain? (3 Points)
-Are the other characters deeply shaken by your character's death? (1 Point)
-Even though they're professional fighters, knew this sort of thing was going to happen sooner or later, and have probably lost comrades in battle before? (2 Points)
-Does the character return from death or apparent death? (5 Points per "resurrection")
-With more power than before? (5 Points. This is being generous. Really, this should make for an automatic flunk.)
-Does the character keep Makuta/The Shadowed One/Some other powerful character on a leash at home, untying them only to use them as training dummies? Do said training dummies enjoy it? (5 Points)
-Does your character's normal moves look like an ordinary game character's super moves? (Let's be perfectly honest, if your character's elemental attacks would be considered a nova blast by many, you should automatically fail.)
-Does the character magically learn an opponent's moves (and/or how to counter them) just by looking at them being used? (2 Points for each one that applies.)
-Does the character dodge everything that gets thrown at him, just 'cause?
-Does the character have really impressive sounding move names, such as "Blazing Super High-Speed Whirlwind Kick of Sudden Death?" (2 Point.)
-And does he/she shout them out in full during battle? (2 Points. Double Points if move names/shouts are in Japanese and your character's not Japanese. Points added at others' discretion if it's really poor, welfare, gutter Japanese that you learned from too much subtitled anime.)

Why do you do it?

Tell me about your parents.
-Does/Did your character work for the Dark Hunters? (1 Point)
-Does/Did your character work for the BoM? (3 Points. Note: Makuta should not count this)
-Does/Did your character work for OoMN? (5 Points)
-Does your character have a "dark past"? (1 Point)
-Does the character feel guilty about something from the past? (Not just forgetting to send a family member a Christmas card, but guilt over major events) (1 Point)
-Despite the fact that it wasn't really the character's fault? (5 Points)
-Does the character have amnesia at any Point in the story? (1 Point)
-Is the amnesia because of something in the character's past? (1 Point)
-Is the character cured of amnesia sometime during the storyline? (1 Point)
-Does the character wish that he hadn't been cured of the amnesia? (-3 Point. Note: This is only if you do it well. If your character is giving off major angst vibes because his past is grim 'n' dark, you don't lose any Points.)
-Have people close to the character died? (1 Point per death. By close I mean something like a good friend, not an acquaintance)
-Is the character primarily motivated by revenge for one or more of these deaths? (2 Points)
-Despite having had an active, strenuous lifestyle that would cause most lifeforms or machines to break down? (2 Points)
-Is your character easily provoked to anger and/or violence? (1 Point.)
-Especially after "being made fun of?" (1 Point.)
-Has your character ever killed someone after being provoked? (2 Points.)
-Does your character kill or destroy anyone/thing he pleases? (3 Points.)
-Does your character ever switch from good to evil, or from evil to good, without major introspection and self-doubt? (1 Point per switch)
-Has your character ever destroyed a fortress, Koro, or similarly major piece of real estate? Even if they didn't mean to? (2 Points)
-Is your character a 21st-century Earth citizen transported to the Bionicle world? (3 Points.)
-Must they stay in that world? (2 Points.)
-Is your character's history remarkably like the history of a canon character? (2 Points)
-Is your character the sole survivor of anything? (3 Points Point)
-Does your character get away with doing things that other people would get into serious trouble for? (3 Points)
-Does he or she make authority figures look like bad guys in the process? (2 Points.)
-Is your character undeservingly despised by the majority? (1 Point)
-Is your character adored by the majority, undeservingly or otherwise? (1 Points)

Why would you do something like that?
-Because it's what my mentor/bestfriend/loved one/dead dog/morality pet would have wanted/wants me to do (1 Point)
-Because I need to right the wrongs of modern society and/or to create a better world (1 Point)
-Because I have an overarching thirst for REVENGE!!! (2 Points)
-Because I need more power/wealth/personal goods/whatever (2 Points)
-Because I feel like it (3 Points)
-Because some things just need to be done. (3 Points)
-The lulz. (4 Points)
-The Evulz (5 Points)
-Reasons? You mean I actually need those? (5 Points)

Where did you learn to do that?
Note: This counts towards stuff like expert swordsmanship, accurate marksmanship, and power manipulation. I will allow you to skip this section if your skill tends to be general, such as going from working on automobiles to working on motorcycles. However this is not skippable if the two fields are related but different. For example, spears and swords are both used in combat, but the fighting styles are completely different so you can not justify going from an expert swordsman to an expert spearsman
-I taught myself after years and years of hard practice. (2 Point)
-I taught myself after a couple of years of hard practice (3 Points)
-I taught myself after a few months of goofing around (4 Points)
-I taught myself after a few weeks of goofing off (5 Points)
-I just picked it up and suddenly was an expert! (Automatic failure)
-I was taught by an expert in the field over many years (0 Points)
-I was taught by an expert in the field over a couple of years (2 Point)
-I was taught by an expert in the field over a few months (3 Points)
-I was taught by an expert in the field over a few weeks (4 Points)
-I was taught by an expert in the field and mastered the technique in a few days so that I surpassed the teacher and now no one can best me in the field (Automatic failure, and you should be ashamed of yourself)
-Does the character happen to be or has been a student of one or more of the major (or even minor) characters in the series? (2 Points)
-If your character has an established character as a mentor, are you deliberately mischaracterizing the mentor to account for her tutelage? (1Point per teacher; 3 Points if this includes the character actually having to not be dead.)
-Does said teacher/teachers respect said student, or even consider him their "successor" and/or newest "rival"? (1 Point (and one pint, too) per applicable teacher and quoted thingie that applies)

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Add the Points up for each character who qualifies.
Note: Major characters in RPGs such as Zyrul from the Academy count towards this.
-I don't know him (0 Points)
-I saw him once (0 Points)
-An acquaintance (0 Points)
-A good acquaintance, not quite a friend (0 Points)
-A friend (1 Point)
-A good friend (2 Points)
-A childhood friend (2 Points)
-I'd take a bullet for him (2 Points)
-He'd take a bullet for me (3 Points)
-He *has* taken a bullet for me (4 Points)
-A friendly rivalry (1 Point. Note: Any following Point values towards rivalries override this one)
-A friendly rivalry that he's winning (0 Points)
-A friendly rivalry that I'm winning (2 Points)
-A bitter rivalry over a woman (3 Points)
-A bitter rivalry that will only end in one of our deaths (4 Points)
-Look, the rivalry's bitter, okay? Don't ask why (4 Points)
-I...will...have...REVENNNNNNGGGGGGEEEEEEE!!! (5 Points)
-He respects my incredible skillz (6 Points)
(At this Point the override ends, and you start counting Points again)`

I fought my rival, and:

-I lost (0 Points)
-I won (1 Point)
-I lost, but it was a long time ago (1 Point)
-I lost very badly (0 Points)
-I lost very badly, just now (-1 Point)
-I won, just now (2 Points)
-I won, easily, and my opponent nearly died (3 Points)
-I killed him (4 Points)

Congratulations! You're finished! Now add up all the Points to see how you did.

0-10 Points
Most likely Not-Sue. Characters at this level could probably take a little spicing up without hurting them any.

11+
A character can go either way at this Point, so Authors should pay attention to ensure that their characters aren't getting too Sue-ish. For an RPG or original fiction character, however, you're probably perfectly fine.

16+
Fanfiction authors beware - Mary's on the loose. There's still a chance you can save this character with some TLC, though. Role-players, you should also strongly consider giving your character a workover.

21+
Fanfiction authors, you might just want to start over. Role-players and original fiction authors, at this Point your characters are likely to provoke eye-rolling and exclamations of "yeah, right!" from your readers. (Well, at least from me.) Immediate work over is probably in order.

26+
Kill it dead. Or make sure you read the instructions properly (some people don't do this, which causes freakishly high scores) and take the test again.

69 Comments


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Anavrin, BZPRPG version;

 

What's in a name?

Did the character choose his name himself?

 

Yes, but I'm putting it at 0 points, as she has to call herself something.

 

What is your character?

A Matoran? (0 Points. If he has Toa powers count him as a Toa)

 

What's your character's origin?

The usual, I guess; nothing to write home about (0 Points)

 

Never thought it out, so I'll leave it at this. However, she's natural, so it doesn't fit with the "Until something happened..." area. Just "how" she's natural, is what I'm trying to piece together XP

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight?

My own two fists (0 Points)

From here to there. How does your character move about?

Walks?

Fly?

-> Via wings

 

+3

 

Tell me about your parents.

Does your character have a "dark past"? (1 Point)

Is your character easily provoked to anger and/or violence? (1 Point.)

Especially after "being made fun of?" (1 Point.)

Has your character ever killed someone after being provoked? (2 Points.)

 

+5

 

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Add the Points up for each character who qualifies.

a good friend (2 Points)

 

+2

 

 

If my calculations are correct, Anavrin has scored a solid 10. But, she has only been around for like, six or so posts, which probably contribute to her rather low score XP

 

-Coupled with the fact that she doesn't have a history, presently.

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Ooh. I remember this one.

Djekkar from AHC.

 

What's in a name?

No points here

 

Is your character the leader of a major organization?

-A leader of a group of Toa? (1 Point)

-A leader of highly trained mercs that kill people for money? (2 Points)

Kind of inbetween those two. 1.5 points

 

What is your character?

-A Toa (1 Point)

Guiltyy as charged. 1 point

 

What's your character's origin? (Choose all that apply.)

-Did your character suffer a traumatic effect in his/her past?

1.5 point.

 

Does your character undergo any physical or metaphysical transformation in the story or back-story? (i.e., was he something else before?)

Nope, nothing here.

 

What do you do?

 

Tell me, what is your day job?

-Fight Evil (1 Point)

-A Ninja (3 Points)

-Kill people for money? (3 Points) (If your character is a bounty hunter, assassin, Dark Hunter, or mercenary, answer "yes.")

Again, he's not quite a mercenary, so I'm giving myself half points for that one. 5.5 points

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)

-My own two fists (0 Points)

-A knife, stick, or a Wolverine-esque claw (1 Point)

-A similar deadly melee weapon (3 Points)

Do nunchaku's count as that last one? 1-4 points

 

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.

Count each element as a separate power. (e.g. Controlling both Gravity and Shadow would net you 8 Points. 5 from Shadow and 3 from Gravity)

-Does your Toa control a custom power?

No points here. I've never heard of wishes as a power.

 

What's your mask power?

Note: If your species can not use a mask or your character does not use a mask skip this section

None here

 

From here to there. How does your character move about?

-Walks? (0 Points)

Or Teleports.

 

Take half Points if you're a Role Player for this next section. All in a day's work

-Does the character save other character(s)? (1 Point.)

-The island that he inhabits? (3 Points)

-Do you fail? (-2 Points.)

Do I have to take half-off that -2? .5 points

 

Accomplishments:

Triple all Points for this section if your character just came into existence

-This time, is it personal?

-Does the character rehabilitate a villain?

-Any BoM/DH members? (1 Point)

Yes, Yes, Yes. 3.5 Points.

 

Why do you do it?

 

Tell me about your parents.

-Does your character have a "dark past"? (1 Point)

-Does the character feel guilty about something from the past? (Not just forgetting to send a family member a Christmas card, but guilt over major events) (1 Point)

-Have people close to the character died? (1 Point per death. By close I mean something like a good friend, not an acquaintance)

-Is your character the sole survivor of anything? (3 Points Point)

With the Death thing: In story, or back-story? 'Cause that would be a 4 point difference. 6-10 points

 

Why would you do something like that?

Hurray for complex motivation!

 

Where did you learn to do that?-I was taught by an expert in the field over many years (0 Points)

 

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Add the Points up for each character who qualifies.

Note: Major characters in RPGs such as Zyrul from the Academy count towards this.

-I don't know him (0 Points)

-I saw him once (0 Points)

-An acquaintance (0 Points)

 

 

We fought once, and:

-I lost (0 Points)

-I won (1 Point)

-I lost, but it was a long time ago (1 Point)

-I lost very badly (0 Points)

-I lost very badly, just now (-1 Point)

-I won, just now (2 Points)

-I won, easily, and my opponent nearly died (3 Points)

-I killed him (4 Points)

Uh, I fought who?

 

Somewhere between 19.5 and 26 points.

Darn 7000-year old character.

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Bio D:

 

The points for the what do you do section were cumulative. You would have taken 3 points. 1 for being leading Toa and an additional 2 for leading mercs.

 

I'd need more info to judge where to put him in respects to being a mercenary. Care to tell me why you think he might fall there?

 

Nunchaku would count as a ninja weapon. Five points.

 

You mean to tell me that you have a Toa without an element or a kanohi?

 

And as for the island saving thing, you would take 2 points. 1+3-2=2

 

Backstory counts. You take 10 points.

 

I'm going to need you to state your character's motivation. I made that section to the point where you should have taken some kind of point value.

 

Adding up your new score: You get a 31.5, and that's not counting any additional points you might have taken for clarification on the mercenary issue, motivational problem, Kanohi or elemental powers. You have failed the test.

 

Edited the test. The We Fought Once has been clarified.

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Who are you?

Oh, which one should I pick...How about Kssndr...

 

What's in a name?

-Does the character share the Author's/Player's name? (This can be their first name, middle name, or the name they go by in chat or an online forum.) 10 Points. Yes, 10 Points. This is actually pretty mild; most Mary Sue litmus tests will automatically flunk a character for this. I admit I'm tempted to do the same.)

-Does the character have a really cool name, like Hunter, Killer, or Death? (2 Points. 4 Points if the name sounds like an AOL user name or a fourteen-year-old wannabe hacker's handle.)

-Does the character's name include the name of a weapon? (Darksword, Gunbot, or just being called Scythe) (1 Point)

-Does the character have more than one name (i.e. a nickname or a pseudonym)? (1 Point for each name)

-Does the character's name have anything to do with disease? (Plague, Virus, Pox, that sort of thing.) (1 Point)

-Is the character's name based on an existing character's name? (Mega Tahu, that sort of thing. If the name is based on more than one character, such as "Gopaka", count the Points for each character.) (2 Points each)

-Is the character's name based on or include a musical term? (1 Point)

-Does your character's name include a color? (1 Point)

-Does your character's name include a title that you use constantly such as Father, King, or Warrior? (2 Points)

-Does he have a name that sounds like an occidental trying to sound Oriental or American Indian (i.e. "Midnight Tiger")? (1 Point)

-Did the character choose his name himself?

-Do you ever, even just to yourself, refer to the character as "me" or "I"? (10 Points. Do not count this if you write from first person.)

0 Points

 

Is your character the leader of a major organization?

-A leader of a group of Toa? (1 Point)

-A leader of a group that fights evil? (2 Points)

-A leader of highly trained mercs that kill people for money? (2 Points)

-A leader of a major political power? (2 Points)

-A leader of a group that kicks puppies because they're evil like that? (3 Points)

-A leader of a group of power hungry people who want to rule the city/world/universe/space-time continuum? (3 Points)

-A leader of a group of people who want to rule the city/world/universe/space-time continuum for the lulz? (4 Points)

-A leader of highly trained ninjas? (6 Points. If your men are stealthy and specialize in assassination then count this towards them.)

-Is said organization part of some kind of resistance against a power greater than itself? (2 Points. Note: Six Toa against a Makuta does not count. Six Toa against the government and its Vahki do.)

Not a leader, so 0 points

 

What is your character?

-A Matoran? (0 Points. If he has Toa powers count him as a Toa)

-A Toa (1 Point)

-A Rahkshi (1 Point)

-A Bohrok (1 Point)

-A support unit (rahi or something similar)? (0 Points)

-A some other species (Krekka, Vortixx, etc.) (1 Point)

-A Toa/Matoran/Rahkshi/Other with powers beyond the norm (5 Points)

-A hybrid of two or more things (2 Points, hordika are exempt from this rule)

-An alien from another planet/galaxy (3 Points. Note: Going from Bara Manga to the Matoran Universe counts as this)

-A Makuta with limited powers and abilities (5 Points)

-A Makuta with regular powers and abilities (7 Points)

-A Makuta with regular powers and abilities, and then some (10 points

-A cosmic and/or supernatural being such as a god, great being, great spirit, or an old one (Honestly, this isn't the test for you. Gods tend to surpass regular beings to the Point they automatically fail)

She's other, so 1 point

 

What's your character's origin? (Choose all that apply.)

-The usual, I guess; nothing to write home about (0 Points)

-A Matoran turned into a Toa by Toa stones (1 Point)

-A Matoran turned into a Toa by some other means? (2 Points)

-From the future (3 Points)

-From the past (2 Points)

-From another dimension (1 Point, if he is from one of the universe above in the hanging out question, count those Points)

____That just happens to closely resemble, or in fact be, modern-day Earth (5 Points)

____Where the universe he's in now is fiction (5 Points)

-Did your character suffer a traumatic effect in his/her past?

-Was an ordinary Matoran/toa until Something Happened (2 Points, and see below)

I suppose she did suffer a traumatic event, as she didn't get her chains for no reason, so how many points is that?

 

Does your character undergo any physical or metaphysical transformation in the story or back-story? (i.e., was he something else before?)

Note: MAJOR upgrades count, but most "normal" upgrades don't. A Matoran to Toa would not count. Toa to cyborg that shoots lasers out of his eyes does.

-Genetically enhanced? (1 Point per aspect. Speed. Strength. Etc.)

-Specifically, a Toa/Matoran into a robot/cyborg/similar? (2 Points)

-If so, did they die before being "rebuilt" as a robot/cyborg/whatever? (5 Points)

-Do you wish you could be transformed into something like the character? (2 Points)

-Does the character angst and/or complain about his new form, despite it being more powerful than his old form? (1 Point)

-Or, conversely, does the character just cheerfully accept it and move on like nothing happened? (2 Points. There *is* a happy medium for this sort of thing, you know.)

0 points

 

What do you do?

 

Tell me, what is your day job?

-Fight Evil (1 Point)

-Own his own lab? (1 Point)

-Sit around all day for no good reason? (1 Point)

-Travel the world as a wanderer? (1 Point)

____In order to get revenge on an enemy? (2 Points)

-Work for a BoM of OoMN? (3/4 Points respectively)

-A pirate? (2 Points)

____A Pirates of the Caribbean esque pirate who really has a heart of gold? (4 Points)

____A pirate that uses a katana? (Automatic fail. You can try to justify it all you want, but I refuse to accept any excuse for this)

-A Ninja (3 Points)

-Kill people for money? (3 Points) (If your character is a bounty hunter, assassin, Dark Hunter, or mercenary, answer "yes.")

-Have an established character (i.e. Taipu) as a student/flunky? (3 Points, 5 Points if he happens to be a major character such as Makuta)

-Hang out with characters from wildly different games/cartoons/movies/TV shows?

____Sonic? (10 Points)

____Mario? (5 Points)

____Megaman? (3 Points)

____Kingdom Hearts? (10 Points)

____ Naurto/Bleach/some other generic anime show (12 Points)

1 Point

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)

-Can't fight (-2 Point)

-My own two fists (0 Points)

-A typical zamor launcher (1 Point)

-A cordak blaster (2 Points)

-Telekenesis (2 Points. 1 Point if this is your only offensive technique besides fists.)

-Explosives (3 points for regular grenades sized explosions. 5 points for medium sized explosions. 10 points if you can take out a base with your explosions)

-A knife, stick, or a Wolverine-esque claw (1 Point)

-An Exo-Toa or similar robot (5 Points)

-A sword (3 Points; 4 if it's a really big one)

-A similar deadly melee weapon (3 Points)

-A Katana or some other ninja weapon? (5 Points)

-A *really powerful* gun (4 Points)

-I don't lift a finger. I just use my INCREDIBUL POWURZ (15 Points. note, Toa/Mask powers do not count as this, but stuff such as huge magical beams do.)

She had a mace, so I'd assume that comes under deadly melee weapons. 3 points

 

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.

Count each element as a separate power. (e.g. Controlling both Gravity and Shadow would net you 8 Points. 5 from Shadow and 3 from Gravity)

-Does your Toa control a traditional power? (Fire, Earth, Rock, Wind, Water, Ice) (0 Points)

-Does your Toa control an unorthodox power? (Electricity, Plants etc.) (1 Point)

-Does your Toa control a custom power?

-Does your Toa control gravity? (3 Points)

-Does your Toa control Light/Shadow (5 Points. If you control both then take 10 Points)

She technically had two custom powers, so double whatever that's worth

 

What's your mask power?

Note: If your species can not use a mask or your character does not use a mask skip this section

-Elda (-1 Point)

-Kaukau, Rau, Ruru, Rode(1 Points)

-Hau, Miru, Akaku, Sanok, Iden, Arthron, Zatth(2 Points)

-Kakama, Paraki, Mahiki, Komau, Calix, Kandin, Huna, Volitak, Kulasi(3 Points)

-Jutlin, Avsa, Felnas, Mohtrek, Shelek, Crast (4 Points, 8 if a Toa)

-Olmak, Tryna(5 Points)

-Olisi, Krahkan, or Avohki(7 Points)

I used her twice and once she had a Kadin and once she had an Iden. That's probably 5 points

 

From here to there. How does your character move about?

-Walks? (0 Points)

-Ride a Kikalano or something similar? (1 Point)

-Takes a Boat/Airship? (1 Point)

____That He/She owns? (1 more Point)

-Fly?

____Via jetpack? (2 Points)

____Via wings? (3 Points)

-A personal hover bike ala Ussa-Nui or something similar? (1 Point)

Yes she flew, using her Kadin or under her own steam, so how many points is that?

 

If your transportation is mechanical, how customized is this thing?

-No bells or whistles or this thing. It's got default factory settings. (0 Points)

-I payed a little bit more for a few little doodads. Nothing spectacular. (1 Point)

-I bought a regular thing and then tooled it to fit my own style. (2 Points)

-I built it from scratch. (3 Points)

No vehicle, so 0 points

 

Take half Points if you're a Role Player for this next section.

All in a day's work

-Does the character save other character(s)? (1 Point.)

-The Koro/Wahi? (2 Points.)

-The island that he inhabits? (3 Points)

-The world? (4 Points)

-At the last minute? (1 Point)

-Do you fail? (-2 Points.)

-Using a newly-developed move which "takes a lot out of them?"

-Does he then proceed to pick himself up and repeat the move several times, taking less and less time to recover every time?

-Is said move capable of seriously damaging a robot with one hit (i.e. would do 50% damage or more if it was actually in real life)?

-Was that "newly-developed move" literally thought of in the last couple of seconds?

-Does said move kill your character?

The first three are all applicable, so 3 points.

 

Accomplishments:

Triple all Points for this section if your character just came into existence

-Is the character the son/daughter/creation of a standard character? (2 Points)

-Does the character fight/oppose an army of bad guys? (2 Points)

-And whoop them all with one hand?

-This time, is it personal?

-Does the character rehabilitate a villain?

-Any BoM/DH members? (1 Point)

-Roodaka, Lariska, any other established character?(3 Points)

-A Makuta? (8 Points)

-Does your character accomplish something single-handedly that others have not been able to accomplish, or have been able to accomplish only at great cost, such as killing a Makuta? (5 Points)

-Does your character die? (1 Point)

-Heroically? (2 Points)

-At the hands of the ultimate villain? (3 Points)

-Are the other characters deeply shaken by your character's death? (1 Point)

-Even though they're professional fighters, knew this sort of thing was going to happen sooner or later, and have probably lost comrades in battle before? (2 Points)

-Does the character return from death or apparent death? (5 Points per "resurrection")

-With more power than before? (5 Points. This is being generous. Really, this should make for an automatic flunk.)

-Does the character keep Makuta/The Shadowed One/Some other powerful character on a leash at home, untying them only to use them as training dummies? Do said training dummies enjoy it? (5 Points)

-Does your character's normal moves look like an ordinary game character's super moves? (Let's be perfectly honest, if your character's elemental attacks would be considered a nova blast by many, you should automatically fail.)

-Does the character magically learn an opponent's moves (and/or how to counter them) just by looking at them being used? (2 Points for each one that applies.)

-Does the character dodge everything that gets thrown at him, just 'cause?

-Does the character have really impressive sounding move names, such as "Blazing Super High-Speed Whirlwind Kick of Sudden Death?" (2 Point.)

-And does he/she shout them out in full during battle? (2 Points. Double Points if move names/shouts are in Japanese and your character's not Japanese. Points added at others' discretion if it's really poor, welfare, gutter Japanese that you learned from too much subtitled anime.)

She does technically oppose an army of bad guys, so 2 points

 

Why do you do it?

 

Tell me about your parents.

-Does/Did your character work for the Dark Hunters? (1 Point)

-Does/Did your character work for the BoM? (3 Points. Note: Makuta should not count this)

-Does/Did your character work for OoMN? (5 Points)

-Does your character have a "dark past"? (1 Point)

-Does the character feel guilty about something from the past? (Not just forgetting to send a family member a Christmas card, but guilt over major events) (1 Point)

-Despite the fact that it wasn't really the character's fault? (2 Points)

-Does the character have amnesia at any Point in the story? (1 Point)

-Is the amnesia because of something in the character's past? (1 Point)

-Is the character cured of amnesia sometime during the storyline? (1 Point)

-Does the character wish that he hadn't been cured of the amnesia? (-3 Point. Note: This is only if you do it well. If your character is giving off major angst vibes because his past is grim 'n' dark, you don't lose any Points.)

-Have people close to the character died? (1 Point per death. By close I mean something like a good friend, not an acquaintance)

-Is the character primarily motivated by revenge for one or more of these deaths? (2 Points)

-Despite having had an active, strenuous lifestyle that would cause most lifeforms or machines to break down? (2 Points)

-Is your character easily provoked to anger and/or violence? (1 Point.)

-Especially after "being made fun of?" (1 Point.)

-Has your character ever killed someone after being provoked? (2 Points.)

-Does your character kill or destroy anyone/thing he pleases? (3 Points.)

-Does your character ever switch from good to evil, or from evil to good, without major introspection and self-doubt? (1 Point per switch)

-Has your character ever destroyed a fortress, Koro, or similarly major piece of real estate? Even if they didn't mean to? (2 Points)

-Is your character a 21st-century Earth citizen transported to the Bionicle world? (3 Points.)

-Must they stay in that world? (2 Points.)

-Is your character's history remarkably like the history of a canon character? (2 Points)

-Is your character the sole survivor of anything? (3 Points Point)

-Does your character get away with doing things that other people would get into serious trouble for? (3 Points)

-Does he or she make authority figures look like bad guys in the process? (2 Points.)

-Is your character undeservingly despised by the majority? (1 Point)

-Is your character adored by the majority, undeservingly or otherwise? (1 Points)

Just the guilt thing, so 1 point

 

Why would you do something like that?

-Because it's what my mentor/bestfriend/loved one/dead dog/morality pet would have wanted/wants me to do (1 Point)

-Because I need to right the wrongs of modern society and/or to create a better world (1 Point)

-Because I have an overarching thirst for REVENGE!!! (2 Points)

-Because I need more power/wealth/personal goods/whatever (2 Points)

-Because I feel like it (3 Points)

-Because some things just need to be done. (3 Points)

-The lulz. (4 Points)

-The Evulz (5 Points)

-Reasons? You mean I actually need those? (5 Points)

A bit of "right the wrongs" and "things need to be done". 4 points

 

Where did you learn to do that?

Note: This counts towards stuff like expert swordsmanship, accurate marksmanship, and power manipulation. I will allow you to skip this section if your skill tends to be general, such as going from working on automobiles to working on motorcycles. However this is not skippable if the two fields are related but different. For example, spears and swords are both used in combat, but the fighting styles are completely different so you can not justify going from an expert swordsman to an expert spearsman

-I taught myself after years and years of hard practice. (2 Point)

-I taught myself after a couple of years of hard practice (3 Points)

-I taught myself after a few months of goofing around (4 Points)

-I taught myself after a few weeks of goofing off (5 Points)

-I just picked it up and suddenly was an expert! (Automatic failure)

-I was taught by an expert in the field over many years (0 Points)

-I was taught by an expert in the field over a couple of years (2 Point)

-I was taught by an expert in the field over a few months (3 Points)

-I was taught by an expert in the field over a few weeks (4 Points)

-I was taught by an expert in the field and mastered the technique in a few days so that I surpassed the teacher and now no one can best me in the field (Automatic failure, and you should be ashamed of yourself)

-Does the character happen to be or has been a student of one or more of the major (or even minor) characters in the series? (2 Points)

-If your character has an established character as a mentor, are you deliberately mischaracterizing the mentor to account for her tutelage? (1Point per teacher; 3 Points if this includes the character actually having to not be dead.)

-Does said teacher/teachers respect said student, or even consider him their "successor" and/or newest "rival"? (1 Point (and one pint, too) per applicable teacher and quoted thingie that applies)

2 points

 

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Add the Points up for each character who qualifies.

Note: Major characters in RPGs such as Zyrul from the Academy count towards this.

-I don't know him (0 Points)

-I saw him once (0 Points)

-An acquaintance (0 Points)

-A good acquaintance, not quite a friend (0 Points)

-A friend (1 Point)

-A good friend (2 Points)

-A childhood friend (2 Points)

-I'd take a bullet for him (2 Points)

-He'd take a bullet for me (3 Points)

-He *has* taken a bullet for me (4 Points)

-A friendly rivalry (1 Point. Note: Any following Point values towards rivalries override this one)

-A friendly rivalry that he's winning (0 Points)

-A friendly rivalry that I'm winning (2 Points)

-A bitter rivalry over a woman (3 Points)

-A bitter rivalry that will only end in one of our deaths (4 Points)

-Look, the rivalry's bitter, okay? Don't ask why (4 Points)

-I...will...have...REVENNNNNNGGGGGGEEEEEEE!!! (5 Points)

-He respects my incredible skillz (6 Points)

(At this Point the override ends, and you start counting Points again)

I fought my rival, and:

-I lost (0 Points)

-I won (1 Point)

-I lost, but it was a long time ago (1 Point)

-I lost very badly (0 Points)

-I lost very badly, just now (-1 Point)

-I won, just now (2 Points)

-I won, easily, and my opponent nearly died (3 Points)

-I killed him (4 Points)

0 points really. She was only ever an officer.

 

That comes to 22, not counting the parts where I didn't know the score. Seems kind of high considering how little she got used in Truth and Fracture. Perhaps because she was in two and i was testing both...

 

 

Oh and:

You mean to tell me that you have a Toa without an element or a kanohi?

He had the element of wishes and the mask of desires. The element would probably be a custom power, but you don't have a section for custom masks

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Oh man, TPTI, please do not quote whole sections of the test, let alone the whole thing.

 

For custom elements and powers, you assign the points you think they deserve. However if your character can control the element of life and you only take a single point for it, I will call you out.

 

And the ability to fly was counted in your Kandin points. You would not take additional points for being able to fly. That section was meant to be used for those with the ability to fly without a mask.

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Haha, okay next time I just quote what's applicable :P

 

I used Kssndr in two RPGs though, and in the variation where she wore an Iden instead of a Kadin she could fly under her own steam

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Scoring Astatiel.

 

What's in a name?

Nothing, what's what. :P

 

Is your character the leader of a major organization?

-A leader of highly trained mercs that kill people for money? (2 Points)

You said we get full points for being the ex-leader, but I still find it odd, considering it was a fight he lost.

 

What is your character?

-An alien from another planet/galaxy (3 Points. Note: Going from Bara Manga to the Matoran Universe counts as this)

 

What's your character's origin? (Choose all that apply.)

-From another dimension (1 Point, if he is from one of the universe above in the hanging out question, count those Points)

 

Does your character undergo any physical or metaphysical transformation in the story or back-story? (i.e., was he something else before?)

Nope!

 

Tell me, what is your day job?

-Travel the world as a wanderer? (1 Point)

Also, you misspelled Naruto. ;)

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)

-My own two fists (0 Points)

 

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.

-Does your Toa control a custom power?

I'm gonna say 1/2 points, because he has (very!) limited Chaos powers, meaning he can create portals but that's it.

 

From here to there. How does your character move about?

None of the above.

 

All in a day's work

None of the above.

 

Accomplishments:

Nada. Technically he died, but I consider that a different character.

 

Tell me about your parents.

-Does your character have a "dark past"? (1 Point)

-Does the character feel guilty about something from the past? (Not just forgetting to send a family member a Christmas card, but guilt over major events) (1 Point)

Note: I can't include some things here due to spoilers, but rest assured it has no effect on the test as a whole.

 

Why would you do something like that?

None of the above.

 

Where did you learn to do that?

This one confuses me. He's had his powers since he came into existence, but learning took a while. Also, I haven't delved into that part of his backstory much.

 

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Add the Points up for each character who qualifies.

Note: Major characters in RPGs such as Zyrul from the Academy count towards this.

-A good acquaintance, not quite a friend (0 Points)

Something like this for Kyrole.

 

I fought my rival, and:

He has a rival?

 

Final score is...

 

9 1/2

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Guest kopakanuva13

Posted

So just for clarification -- does the "relationships with other characters" section mean for literally every other main character? For instance, if you have a very character-based epic it's pretty difficult to make all the close-knit main characters just acquaintances =\

And if they have a few friendships or good friendships/rivalries that boosts the character up a good 4-10 points. I think it'd be much more mary-suish if a character was all indifferent to everyone else, if you know what I mean.

~debbie

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Who are you?

I’m choosing Yuki, my character from the BZRPG.

 

What's in a name?

-Does the character share the Author's/Player's name? (This can be their first name, middle name, or the name they go by in chat or an online forum.) 10 Points. Yes, 10 Points. This is actually pretty mild; most Mary Sue litmus tests will automatically flunk a character for this. I admit I'm tempted to do the same.)

It doesn’t have that last syllable. :P But seriously, I only changed my name to this long after she was created. So no.

 

Does the character have more than one name (i.e. a nickname or a pseudonym)? (1 point for each name)

Yup. Tsuka, though she won’t be using that again.

 

Is the character's name based on a musical term? (1 point)

No, but why is this a question? It doesn’t seem that common.

 

1 point.

 

Is your character the leader of a major organization?

No. I guess hanging around in the background and not taking any initiatives counts for something.

 

What is your character?

-A Toa/Matoran/Rahkshi/Other with powers beyond the norm (5 Points)

She’s a hybrid and an alien too, but I figured this would cover it...

5 points. Ugh...and there not even the usual “powers beyond the norm”.

 

What's your character's origin?

 

-A Matoran turned into a Toa by some other means? (2 points)

Yar. Silly crystal thing, or whatever that was.

 

-From another dimension (1 point, if he is from one of the universe above in the hanging out question, count those points)

Well....um...she’s technically existed in every universe, which would make me flunk this test with infinite points right now. Aww...whatever. I’ll just give myself a point.

 

-Was an ordinary Matoran/toa until Something Happened (2 Points, and see below)

I actually considered adding this too, but she had a rather interesting childhood, and she wasn’t ever technically normal, so I’m not.

 

3 points.

 

Does your character undergo any physical or metaphysical transformation in the story or back-story? (i.e., was he something else before?)

Note: MAJOR upgrades count, but most "normal" upgrades don't. A Matoran to Toa would not count. Toa to cyborg that shoots lasers out of his eyes does.

Yup. But the tranformation was mainly metaphysical, so I don’t really thing the rest of this stuff applies.

 

-Do you wish you could be transformed into something like the character? (2 Points)

Not really. Since people can’t actually read minds, I have no reason to want to protect myself from them. :P

 

0 points. There’s something later in the test that applies better.

 

What do you do?

 

Tell me, what is your day job?

 

-Fight Evil (1 Point)

I suppose.

 

-A Ninja (3 Points)

She’s a sort of samurai, so that’s about the same.

 

-kill people for money? (3 points)

I gave myself half points because she does this only briefly, not to mention the money wasn’t the motivation. She was actually looking for ways to kill people who weren’t innocent.

 

5.5 points

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)

 

-A Katana or some other ninja weapon? (5 Points)

A Katana and Wakizashi. Like I told you, she’s a samurai. XP

 

7.5 points. (Ow....)

 

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.

Count each element as a separate power. (e.g. Controlling both Gravity and Shadow would net you 8 Points. 5 from Shadow and 3 from Gravity)

 

-Does your Toa control an unorthodox power? (Electricity, Plants etc.) (1 Point)

Crystal, though I don’t see why “unorthodox” powers like electricity and plants would be an more powerful that fire. And iron should be at least as powerful as gravity.

 

1 point.

 

What's your mask power?

-Elda (-1 Point)

-Kaukau, Rau, Ruru, Rode(1 Points)

-Hau, Miru, Akaku, Sanok, Iden, Arthron, Zatth(2 Points)

-Kakama, Paraki, Mahiki, Komau, Calix, Kandin, Huna, Volitak, Kulasi(3 Points)

-Jutlin, Avsa, Felnas, Mohtrek, Shelek, Crast (4 Points, 8 if a Toa)

-Olmak, Tryna(5 Points)

-Olisi, Krahkan, or Avohki(7 Points)

Her mask power is invented, and I suppose it’s a little less powerful than a Kadin, but she hasn’t discovered it yet, so I’m not going to give myself any points.

 

 

From here to there. How does your character move about?

-Walks? (0 Points)

Yes! *happydance* I luv walking.

 

No points.

 

Take half Points if you're a Role Player for this next section.

All in a day's work

-Does the character save other character(s)? (1 Point.)

Not actually. I don’t ever recall her saving anyone...wait...there was the telling everyone to retreat before the island went kabloi. Darn.

 

-The world? (4 Points)

She has a part in it. She doesn’t do it on her own. Not at all. So I’m not taking points. *arms cross*

 

.5 points.

 

Accomplishments:

 

-Does your character die? (1 point)

Yeah.

 

-Heroically? (2 points)

I’m pretty sure being killed by a somewhat-friend on your request because your can’t commit suicide in an alleyway with nobody else watching is not heroic.

 

-Are the other characters deeply shaken by your character's death? (1 point) No, I think they were more worried by the fact that Takrah flew off the handle and killed her that her actually dying. And I guess Takrah was depressed, but that was only for like an hour, and he’s usually like that anyway.

 

-Does the character return from death or apparent death? (5 points per "ressurrection")

*headdesk* ONCE. That’s a lot less than some people.

 

With more power than before? (5 Points. This is being generous. Really, this should make for an automatic flunk.)

*grumbles* I suppose so.

 

7 points. *winces*

 

Why do you do it?

 

Tell me about your parents.

 

-Does your character have a "dark past"? (1 Point)

Not to mention insanely complicated.

 

-Does the character feel guilty about something from the past? (Not just forgetting to send a family member a Christmas card, but guilt over major events) (1 Point)

Uh...yeah...

 

-Despite the fact that it wasn't really the character's fault? (2 Points)

Fudge cookies. :(

 

-Does the character have amnesia at any Point in the story? (1 Point)

Um...technically she does. But that’s just a result of not knowing her past life. That doesn’t count, does it? Otherwise I’m screwed.

 

-Have people close to the character died? (1 Point per death. By close I mean something like a good friend, not an acquaintance)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. It’s like seven people D: But they aren’t detailed in the storyline...

 

-Is the character primarily motivated by revenge for one or more of these deaths? (2 Points)

Not primarily motivated by them, no. *wipes brow*

 

-Has your character ever killed someone after being provoked? (2 Points.)

No, all her killing has been decidedly unprovoked. XD

 

-Does your character ever switch from good to evil, or from evil to good, without major introspection and self-doubt? (1 Point per switch)

Nope. Plenty of self doubt/introspection. Not to mention she sort of switched to neutral more than evil.

 

-Is your character the sole survivor of anything? (3 Points)

I hate you.

 

-Is your character undeservingly despised by the majority? (1 Point)

-Is your character adored by the majority, undeservingly or otherwise? (1 Points)

No. The majority is very ambiguous about her. I’m not sure if they even know she exists.

 

4.5 points. I’m really, really glad she’s an RP character. I ended up only counting her parents because let’s face it, a character probably looses a ton of people close to them if their a sole survivor of anything.

 

Why would you do something like that?

-Because it's what my mentor/bestfriend/loved one/dead dog/morality/pet would have wanted/wants me to do (1 Point)

-Because I need to right the wrongs of modern society and/or to create a better world (1 Point)

 

Like most real people, she’s motivated by different things at different times. Honestly, if I ask you what motivates you right now, would you be able to answer? 1 point.

 

Where did you learn to do that?

 

-I was taught by an expert in the field over many years (0 Points)

Haha. I was actually realistic about this. Started learning it when she was about four.

 

-Does said teacher/teachers respect said student, or even consider him their "successor" and/or newest "rival"? (1 Point (and one pint, too) per applicable teacher and quoted thingie that applies)

He’s her father, for goodness sakes. He’s gonna be a bit biased. But I don’t think he considered her his “rival” no.

 

.5 points

 

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Add the Points up for each character who qualifies.

Note: Major characters in RPGs such as Zyrul from the Academy count towards this.

-I saw him once (0 Points)

Zyrul.

 

-A good acquaintance, not quite a friend (0 Points)

Saeras, probably.

 

-A bitter rivalry that will only end in one of our deaths. (4 Points)

Loki. I probably get more points for the “former lovers” thing. *dances around masochistically*

 

(At this Point the override ends, and you start counting Points again)

I fought my rival, and:

 

-I lost very badly (0 Points)

And got killed. Several times.

 

2 points.

 

 

37.5....DAISHIPAI 8D!

 

This is why these tests bother me.

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Edit: Hm, seems I didn't read the introduction as carefully as I thought, as I missed the part where you said this was more of a cliche and power test and less of a Mary Sue test. :rolleyes:

Heh, bonesiii would have a field day with this if he knew about it. FYI - the guy doesn't believe in Mary Sues - which is rather suprising, considering that he's also a very good writer. :P

But, in all honesty, I'm not sure I really agree with the way this test is done. Perhaps its because it seems to confuse "mary sue" and "cliche," which I've always understood to be totally different things. While many of the questions relate to the former (especially the ones about powers and heroic deeds), the ones relating to the less extravagant details like motivations and relationships between other established don't seem to relate to the general idea of a Mary Sue as much. The term cliche would probably fit some characters that fail this test better, especially if their failure has nothing to do with their power or statue in life and more because their personality has been used so many times in various forms of media.

But, then again, I wouldn't necessarily say that a character being cliche or even a Mary Sue is bad, just because they are one or the other. The reason why cliches are cliches are because the ideas behind them simply work well, not because they are bad and shouldn't have ever been used. And as for Mary Sues - well, I think part of their appeal (especially in sci-fi) is that if all characters in a story were average and nothing special, they wouldn't be really that interesting. Heck, most villians in media (including the likes of Darth Vader, Sauron, and other classics) are probably Mary Sues, but that does't stop them from being entertaining, as the entertainment comes from them being big and imposinng.

I think the big problem is that the term Mary Sue has taken on a negative meaning due to the barrage of poorly written fanfiction that the internet has recieved, despite the fact that a Mary Sue can be enjoyable if written well. The big defining factor to me is less about the powers of the character and rather how they are used in the story. Just because a character has incredible powers and has done incredible deeds does't necessarily mean that they are as boring as watching grass grow - especially if they are coupled with an interesting personality and conflicts. The trick is that you have to give them realistic emotions and put them in situations that still pose a challenge to them.

So just for clarification -- does the "relationships with other characters" section mean for literally every other main character? For instance, if you have a very character-based epic it's pretty difficult to make all the close-knit main characters just acquaintances =\
And if they have a few friendships or good friendships/rivalries that boosts the character up a good 4-10 points. I think it'd be much more mary-suish if a character was all indifferent to everyone else, if you know what I mean.


This is what bothered me most about the test, because my stories are both largely character driven and feature a large amount of characters. Factoring in the relationship section, I fear my characters would all come dangerously close to failing just because they live in the same village and know each other fairly well. :blink:

~~END~~
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First and foremost, some clarification on the relationship thing. If you go back and look, I specifically mentioned established characters. That means people like Takua, The Shadowed One, Zaktan, and other canon characters. It would not apply to your own custom characters. Sorry if that wasn't clear.

 

Yukiko, before I go through and address some off your, and my, concerns about the test, I would just like to thank you for not shying away and being honest about your character. I really do apreciate it.

 

As for your concern about the musical term, I was trying to cover all the bases for cool for cools sake names. That's why music names were included.

 

As for the alternate universe question, that would only apply if your character from an universe alternate to the one he currently resides in. You might not have taken a point for that.

 

Instead of giving yourself points for the unorthodox power control, you would have gone with the custom power. However I'd say that 1 point is fair, so the point is moot. And yeah, Iron should be up there with gravity. I honestly haven't put as much thought into the element tiers as I have the Kanohi tiers.

 

You would not have taken points for the amnesia question.

 

I hate you.

;_;

 

As for the over motivation thing, you would go with what most applies to your character.

 

What about this test bothers you? I would like to know so that I can improve upon it.

 

And in all honesty, you were gimped by personal pet peeves of mine. Returning from death with more powers than before has never set well with me, which is why I have it count for so many points. Another pet peeve of mine has been the whole ninja obsession that seems to exist in our culture, which is why I have it count for so many points especially when the case is that the character is a ninja because its 'cool.' You probably would have scored less if I wasn't such a sadist. =P

 

Also, how many years have you been playing Yuki? That might clear up a few issues of mine

 

Zarkan, there are many, many things wrong with your post, but I'd like to ask you one very simple question.

I think the big problem is that the term Mary Sue has taken on a negative meaning due to the barrage of poorly written fanfiction that the internet has recieved, despite the fact that a Mary Sue can be enjoyable if written well.

 

Care to cite an example?

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Remielle Reveria, Villainous

 

What's in a name? None of these apply, skipping

 

Is your character the leader of a major organization?

-A leader of a major political power? Yes

 

What is your character?

-A Toa/Matoran/Rahkshi/Other with powers beyond the norm Toa with wings

 

What's your character's origin? (Choose all that apply.)

-The usual, I guess; nothing to write home about Yes

 

Does your character undergo any physical or metaphysical transformation in the story or back-story? (i.e., was he something else before?)

Note: MAJOR upgrades count, but most "normal" upgrades don't. A Matoran to Toa would not count. Toa to cyborg that shoots lasers out of his eyes does.

-Genetically enhanced? Toa with wings

 

What do you do?

 

Tell me, what is your day job? Again, nothing there, skipping

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)

-A sword Two actually.

-A *really powerful* gun A regular gun

 

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.

Count each element as a separate power. (e.g. Controlling both Gravity and Shadow would net you 8 Points. 5 from Shadow and 3 from Gravity)

-Does your Toa control a traditional power? (Fire, Earth, Rock, Wind, Water, Ice) Yes

-Does your Toa control an unorthodox power? (Electricity, Plants etc.) Yes

-Does your Toa control a custom power? If answering yes to the above means yes

 

What's your mask power?

Note: If your species can not use a mask or your character does not use a mask skip this section

-Kakama, Paraki, Mahiki, Komau, Calix, Kandin, Huna, Volitak, Kulasi Yes

 

From here to there. How does your character move about?

-Walks? Yes

 

All in a day's work Once more, nothing here

 

Accomplishments Nothing

 

 

Why do you do it?

 

Tell me about your parents. Nothing

 

Why would you do something like that? None of these fit, so once more nothing

 

Where did you learn to do that? Never asked, as I've not actually fought once yet, other than pointing a gun at a stalker.

 

 

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Nothing gain

 

I fought my rival, and: No rival. So far I'm the only one who's decided to make a religion.

 

18, not as bad as I thought I'd do.

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While I don't entirely agree with the scoring, you have succesfully destroyed me, and I admit Djekkar as a character was pretty generic :P

Also, I've checked the other test, and you've really made this one tougher.

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Quick reply, then back to cramming for my CLT test. Necro, I'll break yours down this weekend.

 

Bio D: So you agree with the results, but not the scoring? The test says that your character is generic. You agree that the character is generic. What's the problem?

 

And this is what the test was originally meant to be. The original was meant to break people, but I was too lenient. I cranked the difficulty for the ReMIX up to 11, and it is breaking the ones who are being honest about it.

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Guest kopakanuva13

Posted

Ahhhh, makes much more sense now about the relationship thing. I just tested one of my characters and apparently he's either underpowered or just right =\

Either way the thing was more character-based with only like two battles per say in the whole thing so I'm not even sure if this even applies, buuuut...

 

Iaja

Name

>0 points

Leader

>0 points

What is your character?

-A Toa +1

>1 point

Origin

-Matoran to Toa by Toa Stone +1

>2 points

Transformation

>2 points

Job

-Travel the world as a wanderer +1

>3 points

Fighting

-My own two fists (and elemental power on occasion) - Iaja only fights two characters if I remember correctly +0

>3 points

Power

>Unorthodox power (iron) +1

>4 points

Mask Power

-Custom Mask of Influence, which is much like the Komau +3

>7 points

Transport

-Whatever kind of boat he happens to find +1

>8 points

Mechanical transport

-Iaja uses the same boat for a while, with some doodads +1

>9 points

Day's Work

-Saves a few other characters I suppose +1

-Also, lol at that last part. Doesn't happen with Iaja but this is seriously reminding me of "Bleach" XD

>10 points

Accomplishments

>10 points

Why

-Korym was somewhat close to him and died +1

-Kraahua was his mortal enemy but they fought to save the life of one character together so I'll +1 this

>12 points

Motivation

-Trying to figure out what the heck is going on, but there's no point scale for that :\

>12 points

Skills

-Iaja honestly has no skill. He finally manages to control his element and find his mask power by the epic's end so I doubt such novice skill counts :\

>12 points

Relationship with established characters

>12 points

Fought a rival

-Fought Kraahua (an enemy), lost +0

>12 points

 

Total: 12

 

So apparently Iaja's either not a Mary Sue or just not a cliche anime character x3

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Amended the test. Changed the point value for not feeling guilty over an event in the past despite it not being the character's fault. Honestly, it's the most sueish thing on the test, and it isn't fair that you take more points because you use a katana. Added Iron to the 3 point elemental power list.

 

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Who are you?

 

What's in a name?

0 points.

 

Is your character the leader of a major organization?

0 points

 

What is your character?

10 points.

 

What's your character's origin? (Choose all that apply.)

0 points.

 

Does your character undergo any physical or metaphysical transformation in the story or back-story? (i.e., was he something else before?)

Note: MAJOR upgrades count, but most "normal" upgrades don't. A Matoran to Toa would not count. Toa to cyborg that shoots lasers out of his eyes does.

0 points.

 

 

What do you do?

 

Tell me, what is your day job?

1 point.

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)

5 points.

 

Count each element as a separate power. (e.g. Controlling both Gravity and Shadow would net you 8 Points. 5 from Shadow and 3 from Gravity)

5 points.

 

What's your mask power?

Note: If your species can not use a mask or your character does not use a mask skip this section

4 points.

 

From here to there. How does your character move about?

0 points.

 

If your transportation is mechanical, how customized is this thing?

0 points.

 

Take half Points if you're a Role Player for this next section.

All in a day's work

2 point.

 

Accomplishments:

Triple all Points for this section if your character just came into existence

0 points.

 

 

Why do you do it?

 

Tell me about your parents.

2 points.

 

Why would you do something like that?

4 points.

 

Where did you learn to do that?

Note: This counts towards stuff like expert swordsmanship, accurate marksmanship, and power manipulation. I will allow you to skip this section if your skill tends to be general, such as going from working on automobiles to working on motorcycles. However this is not skippable if the two fields are related but different. For example, spears and swords are both used in combat, but the fighting styles are completely different so you can not justify going from an expert swordsman to an expert spearsman

0 points.

 

What other kinds of relationships does your character have with established characters, if any? Add the Points up for each character who qualifies.

Note: Major characters in RPGs such as Zyrul from the Academy count towards this.

0 points.

 

I fought my rival, and:

1 point.

 

 

Total: 34 pts.

 

 

 

I feel crazy. :P Better go in and rewrite this character.

 

-SK

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Can you list what specific ones you got? I can help you identify which ones you should have actually taken if I knew.

 

Also, amended the weapons section. And by amended I mean revamped it completely.

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Honestly, it's not the specific test that bothers me, it's rather the nature of tests. You can take all the Litmus Tests you want, but really the only way to tell if your character is original and well thought out is by reading your stuff. These things do provide a good benchmark though.

 

As for the "dying and coming back to life thing"...well, I admit it's been overused, especially in the BZRPG.

 

I started playing in the Academy in October of 2006. Back then, Yuki would have probably passed the test with flying colors. She was a normal Academy toa with powers below average and a plain staff for a weapon. The only extraordinary thing about her was that she was a good crystal carver and she was actually a spy for a matoran organization. But as things went on, she sort of developed in response to other people, and well...it got complicated. She only go her speshul powers quite recently, but that's a story for another day. And she's a samurai, not a ninja XP.

 

I'm pretty sure most of my other characters could get by this test, though.

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I agree, that there's only so much a test can tell you, and if you write a character well enough, you can disregard the test. I've just noticed that those who tend to be pirate toas of darkness who fly around on wings and wield Katanas tend to not be that well written. As I've said, this test, in fact any mary sue litmus tests is a tool to help you evaluate your character. If you think that you're justified in how you write your character, then by all means go ahead and use him/her. Just know that having a high point value is a reason to take a step back and reevaluate a newly created character.

 

And that's only for newly created characters. I actually had a long and fun talk with Tuck about how characters that have been around for several years in an RPG will naturally score higher on this test. That's why I put that disclaimer at the top, which really should read a few years rather than +5.

 

And I understand that she's a samurai, but considering that many Asian things are hip and trendy nowadways, the market tends to be saturated with it. I've read some of your posts, and really, you're perfectly fine. You're not who this test was intended for.

 

I actually have what I consider to be a fairly good reason for this test. I feel as if that in my last one, that people were getting passing scores with characters that should have failed the test. That's why I cranked the difficulty up on this one.

 

And as stated in the intro, feel free to disregard this test as you please. As I've said numerous times, it's a test. It's not the end all be all character test. =P

 

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I won't list the ones I didn't choose anything on, but here are the ones I did choose:

 

What is your character?

-A Makuta with regular powers and abilities, and then some (10 points)

 

What's your character's origin?

-The usual, I guess; nothing to write home about (0 Points)

 

Tell me, what is your day job?

-Own his own lab? (1 Point)

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight?

-A Katana or some other ninja weapon? (5 Points)

 

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.

-Does your Toa control Light/Shadow (5 Points)

 

From here to there. How does your character move about?

-Walks? (0 Points)

 

All in a day's work.

-The island that he inhabits? (3 Points)

-At the last minute? (1 point)

 

Tell me about your parents.

-Has your character ever destroyed a fortress, Koro, or similarly major piece of real estate? Even if they didn't mean to? (2 Points)

 

Why would you do something like that?

-The lulz. (4 Points)

 

Where did you learn to do that?

-I was taught by an expert in the field over many years (0 Points)

 

I fought my rival, and:

-I won (1 Point)

 

So that's it. The ones I didn't answer meant simply that none of the answers suited my character. ;)

 

-SK

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Everything seems in order. I can't really tell anything you should add or remove. However you would not have taken the five points for shadow powers due to the fact that you're a Makuta. You still have a fairly cliche character on your hands though.

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What's in a name?

Sonbi

~0 Points

 

What is your character?

Vortixx (+1)

~1 Point

 

 

Does your character use some kind of weapon to fight? (Multiple weapons are cumulative.)

A Katana or some other ninja weapon? (+5)

~6 Points

 

 

Because there's nothing cooler than shooting fire from your fingers.

Does your Toa Vortixx control a custom power? (+3)

~9 Points

 

Where did you learn to do that?

Does the character happen to be or has been a student of one or more of the major (or even minor) characters in the series? (+2)

~11 Points

 

Not too bad right now, but that's probably because I have not done much of anything.

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