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You're Only Right If I Agree With It


Opinions are like noses. Everyone has one, but just because someone's is different than yours doesn't mean there's something wrong with it.

 

Our opinions are one of the things we treasure most. Probably because they're pretty much what forms us... if we didn't think anything about anything or anyone, things would be pretty bland. Though on the plus side, since no one would like or dislike, the human race could eat dirt. Think of all the time we'd save not having to cook! We could just run out in the backyard and munch on a big handful of mud! Although a lot of professional chefs might be a little irritated with their sudden lack of a job...

 

...Wait, where was I going with this? :blink:

 

There's a difference between someone saying, "Ugh, I hated that movie... the plot dragged on longer than the time spent in the doctor's waiting room and all the characters sounded like Mickey Mouse speaking Arabic," and "Ugh, your nose is so ugly and it looks like a dead mushroom."

 

It can be really hard to answer, though (the former, that is -- we won't even go into the nose statement). When you personally adored that movie and thought the Mickey Mouse voices added great depth to the character development, it's easy to take that statement as an attack on your likes and dislikes and possibly your development as a human being.

 

So one thing that I wonder when that happens is, "Wait, why would you make a statement like that? You should have worded it more nicely!" And, as you will see in many cases all over the internet, the first reaction is to shake that in their face, inform them where they're wrong (because it's impossible for the plot to be too long if you think it's perfect!), and march off the battlefield, leaving them as a defeated shell of a being in the smoldering wreckage.

 

And then the other person's all, "Dude, what's your problem!? It's not my fault if you take offense at my 'rudeness'! And you know what, only a person with a bowl of rice for a brain would like that stupid movie! There!"

 

But -- what!? How could they say that!? You need to show them the error of their ways before it's too late and they're condemned forever to a death of eternal doom! But they refuse to accept what you offer! And then you know there's nothing left to do but pull out the guns...

 

"Yeah, well your mother's so deserving of derogatory comments that oranges laugh! And she wears army boots!"

 

"But your mother's going to bald more in her old age! Oh, and your uncle eats napkins!"

 

...

 

And all of this (well, most of it) can be avoided by controlling the only person you will ever really be able to control. All you have to do (if you say anything at all -- not replying is an option (although that's hard to remember D=)) is state your opinion with just a little bit of wording changed.

 

"Movie critics all over the world agree with me! Just read this site and this site, and you're insensitive and Mickey Mouse hates you too!"

 

Versus...

 

"I personally thought the voices added a lot to the characters. I guess they can grate on the ears, but I thought regular adult voices might have clashed with the smiling lollipops flying in the background and the Happy Healthy Hippo's theme song."

 

Taking a moment to consider what the person said... actually addressing them... and being sure to make it clear that this is what you think and you are not stating it as fact. Even if that's not the courtesy they gave you, you can win respect from them by giving them attention, not taking offense easily, and considering that what they're saying could in fact be true.

 

And even if you don't win respect or friendship, you can walk away knowing that no "your mama >=O" fights will be initiated in your territory today.

 

...

 

Opinions are like noses... but unlike noses, your opinion can be (inexpensively!) altered/reworded.

 

Also, this entry isn't directed at anyone in particular except myself. I don't know about you, but when I find myself or one of my alternate personalities getting out of hand, nothing works better than a nice blog entry scolding to bring me into line. I'm already cowering in a corner begging me for forgiveness!

 

 

Turakii

20 Comments


Recommended Comments

Vezok's Friend

Posted

My nose is running...

 

<<

 

>>

 

...as far away as possible!

 

PS: So young and already so wise...how'd you do that?

Takuma Nuva

Posted

Okay, Turakii, well said, but I still say that Taylor Swift sucks. :)

 

«Takuma Nuva»
Laughing Man

Posted

Okay, Turakii, well said, but I still say that Taylor Swift sucks. :)

To add on to this, I still say that Lady Gaga, Nickelback, and Groundhog Day suck. :)

Eyru

Posted

Okay, Turakii, well said, but I still say that Taylor Swift sucks. :)

To add on to this, I still say that Lady Gaga, Nickelback, and Groundhog Day suck. :)

HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT YOU'RE JUST BEING RIDICULOUS!!! :burnmad:

 

Er, I mean... I disagree with your opinion. I respect that you don't like Nickelback, but I really enjoy their songs and they are one of my favourite bands.

 

[/lessonlearned]

-SZ-

Posted

"You know the golden rule, the one with the gold makes the rule!"

 

:evilgrin:

 

...

 

ahem.

 

Also yes. Good entry. The internets are full of flamers. They be inconsiderate...at best. Reform. Yes. Mwaha.

 

>.>

 

Just do to other as you want them to do to you. I mean, how hard is that for people to understand these days? And don't say I love being flamed, because, if you do, YOU'RE CREEPEH! >=O

 

...

 

also weird post is weird

 

-SZ-

Comment Expired

Posted

Opinions and arguments and debate are all great things. Every time you clash with something different, you change and grow.

 

Flaming people and attacking them isn't good though.

delta48

Posted

Long entry is long. My brain hurts. ;-;

what he siad

Lara White

Posted

The only thing is: you can dislike your own nose, but you can't disagree with your own opinion. :P

 

:w:

bonesiii

Posted

Sure you can, Lloyd. I meet people on BZP all the time who apparently disagree with their own opinions. :P

 

Very wise words, Turakii.

 

In truth, learning to respect others' tastes is easy -- although admittedly pride can be a difficult hurdle. It's as simple as realizing that we all are interdependant on each other, and those different tastes actually represent uniquely different talents, which helps society as a whole survive.

 

So varied tastes is a good thing, and once we grasp that, it becomes easy to not just respect others' tastes, not just tolerate them, but even to be curious about them and even come to enjoy them too! And live with joy, instead of constant frustration. ^_^

 

I'd add that it's helpful sometimes to remember there's a big difference between personal taste (which we usually cannot help; is genetic and stems from our own unique talents), and other kinds of opinions (which we can change, like an opinion that dogs aren't smart can change when you spend a lot of times around dogs, for example). I know a lot of people would even get huffy at your second-to-last paragraph; that might clarify it for them if so. :)

 

*is forced to dig up approval banner after lazily neglecting it for too long*

 

skull_of_approval.gif

 

Use of this image is valid only when posted by bonesiii. High quality content is requisite. The blog entry itself wins the award. If you win multiple times, you are permitted to say so whereever you display the award.

Jordboy1

Posted

There's still such a thing as being wrong though. :P

 

-Jordboy1 :miru:

Catra

Posted

There's still such a thing as being wrong though. :P

 

-Jordboy1 :miru:

HAHAHA YOU ARE SO WRONG IT'S AMAZING JUST GO AWAY

 

wait what

 

 

also Turakii deserves this

CyclonatorZ

Posted

If I had an approval image that I actually liked at the moment, this entry would have won it. :P In all seriousness, fantastic entry Turaki. It boggles my mind why some people on this and other sites can't seem to understand this basic truth of discussion. If we all did, I think the world would be a whole lot better place to live in. :)

Edit: Nevermind, now I do have an approval image that I approve of. :P

blogapprove.png

~~END~~
Toa Xenronn

Posted

Very true, Turakii. Except for the part about chefs (har har aspirations), I agree. I see too much of this stuff; not only online but just in society in general. I try to think and find out why people are so harsh towards each other, but each time I try I come up empty-handed, no explanation whatsoever. How people can be so venomous to each other is beyond me - it doesn't accomplish anything and usually leads to more of the same. The more I see of it in society, the more is on the internet, and the other way around. Maye they're connshnected? (connected, for those of you who don't slur your words on purpose :P )

 

Human nature is to have your own personal opinion and way of acting around others, and I know that people don't sometimes like the way I act. (trust me, I'm different offline.) But there's no need to get up-in-arms about it, we can work through disagreements as easily as a knife cuts through water. Simple calm discussion is all that is needed, and that's really the only thing I never see anymore.

So really, all of us could be nice, caring individuals. Humans in general, I mean. Instead, we all seem to be fighting for what we think is right, when really it's up for debate that every single thought in the world is both right and wrong at the same time, depending on the angle you look at it from. I try to do that with every bit of info I hear(which is tons), and so maybe that's why I have this particular opinion.

 

The simply put version: people are too mean to each other both on-and-offline these days and, like Turakii said, it's not getting us anywhere. Calming down and just talking is the key here I think, and it doesn't help that anyone can deny a claim they think is wrong if they're creative enough.

 

Whoe. (that's a short, hard breath outwards).

I think that speech had been locked away for years! speaking of something else locked away for years....

(this literally took forever to find):

sealoftruth.png

And your post deserves this, T.1

 

_Xenronn of Moon

Jonah Falcon

Posted

Guys, why are you giving Turakii approvals when she doesn't have an approval block.

 

oh btw, i agree with turakii

Catra

Posted

Guys, why are you giving Turakii approvals when she doesn't have an approval block.

 

oh btw, i agree with turakii

actually yes she does, lurk moar

Jean Valjean

Posted

:kaukau:I think this all got solved when I read bonesiii's Terms of Debate blog entry. Once I learned how easy it is to distinguish between tastes are different than opinions, it was very easy to respect the tastes of other people.

 

Now, I would like to say, however, that someone's only right if I agree with them, because I am, after all, Logic.

 

Your Honor,

Emperor Kraggh

Lazzy the Spazzy

Posted

Much easier on the eyes than Bones's equivalent. I'm almost averse to going back to the blog post that directed me here in the first place.

 

On your content. I can only agree. Your blog post seems to be mostly observation, and an insightful and accurate one at that.

 

However, people will always have a sense of pride -- none of us has 100% humility. Expressing our opinions is good and all until it starts treading on and stifling others' opinions, but while it is a problem, it is one that is here to stay and that cannot be changed. At least, not in our lifetime.

 

Yes, we can tone down our arrogance, our angst, our incredible capacity to place ourselves on a pedestal, but unfortunately, 1) the internet, with its gift of relative anonymity, tempts us to give into our egos and forget about all sense of responsibility, and 2) the biggest trouble-makers are probably the ones that have not read your blog or even know that it exists.

 

Pride is a problem that will eventually be resolved -- and by that, I mean over our lifetimes individually and over generations as the human race. But for now, it might be best to accept that there will always be those who like to feed their egos, and move on.

bonesiii

Posted

Well, Multivac, 1) As long as people are limited to individual member accounts (and we have our ways to check that ;)), the anonymity might "protect" people's actual personal identities, if they are careful not to give out personal info ----- but everybody's actions DO reflect on their member accounts. Including reputation. :)

 

And of course, anonymity on the internet is largely a myth, anyways. All actions leave a trail. Not that relevant for most actions on here, though.

 

But 2) true, but if it ever gets to the point that staff need to give a warning, we could always link here as advice if we wanted. ^_^

Lord Kaitan de Storms

Posted

There's still such a thing as being wrong though. :P

 

-Jordboy1 :miru:

 

I dunno what happened to my comment, but this paraphrases what I said in it.

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